5 Reviews Found

Review #1, by marauder5 

8th April 2015:
Reading Tor's conversation with Theo just got me thinking about how much has changed since the start of this story. It's just getting so much darker (fits well with the chapter title!) and it's also getting more and more interesting. As things get more and more serious outside the school, the same things happen in Tor's life and you've portrayed that perfectly, not just in that conversation but in the overall tone of the story in the recent chapters.

And then, of course, you balance it out perfectly by having Griz Goyle trip and show her granny pants. Perfect!

I absolutely loved the little antidote of Flitwick having to let in a group of students who were forced to sleep in the corridor. JKR is an expert at making up little stories like that and this one would have fit right in one of her books. Brilliant!!

Honestly, I marvel over and over at how beautiful your writing is at times. Those paragraphs starting with "And I wish the story could end there." were just so well written, and I definitely felt what Tor was feeling right then. Wouldn't it have been wonderful if Dumbledore would have been around to help here? It all might have worked out for her and Terry.

It was so interesting to see experience the night Dumbledore's dies from a different perspective. It must have been hell, sitting down in that common room and not knowing what was going on, which must have been what that night was like for most students at Hogwarts. Of course, in Tor's and many of the Slytherin's case, they know the Death Eaters up there fighting. It was perfectly written and I have to tell you again how amazed I am by your writing each time I read a chapter. Your descriptions are absolutely perfect and I'm SO happy that I found this story and I can't thank you enough for writing it. You're amazing x

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Review #2, by Teddy1993 

22nd September 2014:
I prefer Greenboot :)

Amazing chapter! It's always interesting to see events from the books through other eyes in these kind of stories and you handled that perfectly here. I didn't even think about what Dumbledore's death means for Tor before I read this... Maybe Dumbledore confided in someone else about her (Snape, perhaps?). At least Ginny can still vouch for her, but the question is how much she can do.

This story is absolutely incredible. The more I read, the more hooked I am. You are an amazing writer.

Author's Response: I like Greenboot too! :D Or maybe Bootgrass? Hmm.

Thanks!! :D I'm glad you like seeing Tor's perspective on canon events, it's one of the things which both helps to structure the story but also challenge it. Dumbledore's death represents the death of hope or protection for Tor, kind of like how it represents the end of childhood for Harry in the books. Ginny is limited as she is a kid and still considered as such by many adults, but she does change a lot in the coming months as well.

Wow, thank you, that is such amazing praise! ♥ I just don't know how to thank you!! :)

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Review #3, by nott theodore 

15th August 2014:
Hi again, love!

Oh my goodness! I know that I probably should have expected something like this when I saw the chapter title but I didn't think that things would deteriorate so quickly and turn so dark! I feel so sad now!

I really like the way that you manage to move the narrative along in this story by using the canon events and placing Tor within them, because it really helps the pacing since we already know the sort of time of year that this happened. It makes sense that the spin on the Harry and Draco duel would appear differently in the Slytherin common room, especially with Pansy Parkinson milking it for all she's worth. It was great to see the talk between Pyxis and Theo as well, because I've kind of missed the Nott boys. I think that Pyxis is probably even more reluctant than Theo to get involved in everything, especially now that he knows that Tor could be caught between sides. That's what I'd like to think, anyway - at least, he didn't seem happy with Theo and Theo's clearly nervous and scared about what's coming. I can only hope that since Draco will be back at school the following year, Theo will be too, but I can't help remembering the line that two of them would be dead, and now I'm more worried than ever!

It was lovely to see some more light and happiness in this chapter, though! I have the feeling that it's going to be the last of it we see for quite a while. It was great to see the way that Tor was happy for Ginny and she's changed her mind so much that she's more appreciative of the love that she can see than anything else. I really like the friendship that there is between Tor and Ginny and even though it's going to be really difficult, I'm hoping that they manage to stay friends through the next year at Hogwarts, as I imagine that it would really help Tor. Maybe she'll even be part of the resistance that the DA are leading...

Aw, when Tor told Terry that she was going to work for Dumbledore and do her best to protect them all, the scene was absolutely adorable! You write their relationship so well and I just kind of wanted to stop reading there because I knew that something was going to happen soon that would stop them from getting their happy ending. It's so heartbreaking to see them because they really deserve to be happy, especially when Tor's prepared to risk so much to protect them and their relationship, but it's just not possible and that's so sad.

I loved the way that Tor addressed the reader directly (a little like Jane Eyre, actually) because that just changed the tone of the whole chapter, it was so ominous. When she said that I realised that you'd included all of the clues already but I hadn't been picking up on them till that moment.

I thought the way that you kind of predicted the ending of the chapter but then went into a scene which was relatively happy in comparison was really effective. The contrast shows just how much there is to be lost from what they've got already. And it's really interesting to see it from another perspective. I can't help but be a bit relieved that the Ravenclaw boys didn't answer the call on the DA coins, because it would have been so dangerous for them. I can understand that they wouldn't have realised that it was actually necessary too, from the way they were laughing and joking about it.

Aw, all the cuteness between Tor and Terry was so adorable and just made me smile so much! I really wish it could have continued for a little longer, but I can't help but think it's actually really good that Terry didn't walk Tor back to the Slytherin common room, as they'd doubtless have been caught then if he had!

Ugh, the scene with Greyback was so chilling! You wrote the confusion and chaos of that scene so brilliantly and it was really scary to watch as Tor encountered the Death Eaters without them actually realising who she was. I'm really glad that Draco spoke up for her, because it takes a lot to do and I can't imagine him not standing up to stop something happening there - especially when we know that Tor and Draco will marry eventually. But it was so terrifying to read as Tor thought she might get hurt by them, until they realised who her father was. In a way, it's good that she still had that sort of protection because if not, I'm sure Greyback wouldn't have had any qualms about hurting her.

I thought the final part of the chapter, when Tor rushed into the common room and confirmed what was happening, was great. It makes sense that the other students started realising that something was happening in the castle, but that they were so scared they chose to avoid it and not to get involved. Pyxis was really quick thinking to disarm Tor before she could leave as well, and I'm glad that he managed to do it without giving away her secret! I'm hoping that he'll continue to protect her secret about Terry for as long as possible, but I'm getting so apprehensive now that I know the prologue scene is coming up so fast.

Oh dear, that last line in this chapter! It was so poignant and upsetting because there'd been so much hope earlier on and it was really nice to think that Tor and Terry might have a chance to live happily, but then Dumbledore is killed and there's no chance for her to escape from her family the way that she wanted to. I'll be back for some more soon, but I've not got many characters left so I'm going to finish this now :P

Sian :)

Author's Response: Hey Sian! :D Okay, I'm realizing how many reviews you left me on August 15th, and they're all so long and thoughtful too. How do you do it?!! :P

Things really did take turn for the worst, didn't they? (And it's all downhill from here for a while :P). I'm glad you liked the effects of the fight between Harry and Draco, it felt right that it would have a great impact on the Slytherins in general. Pansy is just so annoying but entertaining to write. :P I missed the Nott boys too! Theo has been going through a really slow and quiet change behind the scenes from the beginning of the story, and Tor hasn't been paying him enough attention lately to see what's been happening to him.

I'm glad you liked hearing about Ginny! Tor is happy for her and she remembers how Ginny has helped her in the past, which really has made this bond between them even if they don't spent all that much time together. I'm glad you found that moment with Tor and Terry cute, they are very sweet together. :)

That's so neat that you compared what she says to Jane Eyre as I had just read it at the time of writing this. :P It's something that I've sort of picked up from my 19th century lit classes especially with how the narrator talks to the audience and seems like they're in the future looking back in telling their story.

I'm so glad you thought I wrote the chaos well! I was worried about it seeming too dramatic and unrealistic but Tor has a knack for getting into the wrong place at the wrong time. Draco really does step up in helping her here, which he sort of had to do. Tor has gotten away with a lot because of who her father is, so she is lucky in that way.

In a place as large as Hogwarts I was wondering how the students would know something was going on, so this felt like a realistic way to do it. Pyxis does want to protect Tor as much as he can but it's not always easy, and he is still upset with her for her actions.

Dumbledore was really the easiest way for Tor to get everything she wants. Like with Harry, Dumbledore's death signifies how she has to do things on her own and not just wait around for an easy solution.

Thanks so much for another absolutely wonderful review, dear! ♥

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Review #4, by marauderfan 

21st January 2014:
Just so you know, I am reading this in the airport and reviewing on a tablet so apologies in advance for spelling weirdness and the fact that its a short review. Anyway aaa! The beginning of this chapt3r definitely felt like the calm before the storm. I loved Tor's optimism and happiness but i could tell it was short lived :( and I loved her conversation with Ginny as well! It was so happy that it was just too good to be true. But it was really nice seeing the two girls interact again, I think they could have ben good friends.

and then the second half :( nnot when everything is finally goingso well! It was so sad. I'm glad Draco stood up for her though. It was really obvious he doesn't like the side he's on. I wish i could say more but I''m really having issues typing on this keyboard. Anyway it was a lovely chapter!!

Author's Response: Hello! :) Ah, safe travels! :D

It definitely was the calm before the storm - of course something had to happen to ruin Tor's hopes. Poor girl. :( I'm glad you liked seeing Ginny again, and how well they get along. They actually have quite a lot in common, in some ways, and I really love writing both of them.

Gah! :( I'm glad you liked Draco here- he did try to be a little noble instead of just wimpy all the time. This is when Draco really sees the consequences of his actions so I'm glad he was there for Tor. You're right, Draco is completely regretting his side right now, the poor kid.

Thanks for the lovely review, I really appreciate it! :D You're awesome!

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Review #5, by greenbirds 

21st January 2014:
this was so painful to read.
"dumbledore is dead, and my hopes of escape, a future away form the death eaters, of a chance to forge a new life, are dead with him."
why would you do that?! i'm honestly shaking. tor is so good, and her conversation with ginny just made my heart swell with happiness; i genuinely though it was all going to start looking up! i was envisioning tor living with tonks' mother and becoming a friend of the weasley's and all that jazz; until the last line!
i'm happy we saw a little bit more humanity in pyxis and daphne. i a;ssume we'll see more of pyxis in the upcoming chapter, and he really is one of my favourite characters! theo irritates me more and more with every chapter, and the descriptions of crabbe and goyle sitting there during the night's events "puffing out their chests and surrounded by a circle of older student" made my blood boil. how annoying! it's just kind of like. lol can u not x fanx x
your narrative runs so smooth; your writing just gets better and better to the point where now, i'm speechless- it reads like a genuine, published book. the lack of dialogue in this chapter compared to other chapters really highlighted how dramatic the events were.
another thing i'd like to compliment you on is just how well you write canon! you got draco SPOT on- you go girlfriend. and it aallwwaayyss makes me smile, hearing about "potter" from a slytherin's point of view, because you know, i've always only really thought about the harry potter stories from harry potter's perspective.
my heart bleeds for tor, and if things don't shape up i'll cry. again.
bea xx

Author's Response: Hello! :)

Ah, I'm sorry! :( I'm glad you liked theGinny conversation, and I'm very sorry for building up everyone's hopes like that. I know, things were looking up, but this really does change everything.

I want to include more Daphne in the coming chapters, and Pyxis as well. It's lovely to know you like him, he's one of my favourite characters as well! :D Haha, Crabbe and Goyle are just my favourites in how awful they are. :P

Thank you! :) You're so lovely, it really means a lot to hear those comments about my writing. And it's really amazing to hear you thought Draco was well written - he's tricky! Haha, I imagine Harry would be quite notorious around the school and not necessarily popular among the Slytherins. :P

Thanks so much for the lovely review! :D It really made my day. ♥

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