20 Reviews Found

Review #1, by FAFan 

17th August 2017:
Hahahaa when she suggests a pensive that makes me laugh so much. I'm re reading old chapters I swear there used to be a scene with the gryffindors and James tensing up as Fred announces albums is going some where with effy did you take that out? It was so good!!

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Review #2, by Alena 

26th March 2017:
OH MY GOD I am so jealous of your characterization. Seriously, they just seem to pop off the page and come alive in my head as I'm reading about them. I love how quickly you can sketch out a character - sometimes with just a few descriptive words and some dialogue - until they are already so memorable.

Most of all your dialogue is incredible. I'm basically crying with envy right now. It's so natural, so zippy, so bright and has so much realistic rythm. You just are so brilliantly able to capture the vagueness, the speed, the redundancy, the idiosyncracies and the pure ridiculousness of most human conversation. Instead of feeling like outlets for exposition, your dialogue moves the plot forward while also revealing character and being funny.

Also, side note, I love how much mention there is of school work so far. I hate it when fanfics just completely ignore the fact that students have classes, to the point where homework, teachers, etc. are never even brought up. Also, since they're Ravenclaws I feel like this makes even more sense and is even more important for the characters.

Anyway, I can't wait to read more and I definitely think you deserved those Dobbys!

Author's Response: thank you, thank you, thank you! what an overwhelmingly lovely review- you're waaay too kind & ironically your description within this review totally outshines mine in the story itself! do you write?

anyway, i've found myself speechless. you've picked out everything i wanted to achieve when writing FA- realistic teen dialogue, realistic teen life- including (especially) an abundance of work- and its relation to the characters as ravenclaws. thank you SO much!

you're the absolute best. thank you infinitely. xoxox

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Review #3, by scintillated 

26th February 2017:
CONGRATS ON YOUR DOBBYS! They were so well deserved - this story is absolutely AMAZING & I'm typing this on my phone so this review is going to be short but congratulations again! FA is great and one of my absolute favorite stories on this site; your writing is so enrapturing and Effy is so real it makes for an amazing story.

(Also this chapter was really nice; Effy crushing on Al seems like a realistic way for her to meet James, and your writing is as great as always!!)

Author's Response: thanks so SO MUCH! i am also SO sorry with how late this reply is, how long its taken me to sit down and type out a response. your words mean everything to me & i cannot thank you enough !! all my love ♥

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Review #4, by nott theodore 

6th March 2016:
Hi again!

Oh my goodness, I've just realised that I spelt Effy wrong in my last review and now that's so embarrassing - please forgive me! :(

Ah, this chapter went in a direction I wasn't expecting from the first one, so I'm really intrigued to see what happens from here. If Effy likes Albus now but is going to end up with James, it could be really messy with the two brothers and I hope that doesn't happen because it would be so awkward and difficult. Anyway, it's exciting for Effy that Albus seems to like her back at the moment and I'm really curious to see what's going to happen next.

One thing I didn't mention yet was the humour that runs throughout these chapters. It's just so entertaining to read this story, and there's so much humour threaded through the narrative that it makes me smile. JJ Fletcher is a very amusing and vivid character (I can imagine how awkward it would feel for Effy to have him obsessed with her) and the thoughts on the History of Magic chapter were so relatable. It's such a disappointment that a subject with so much potential is taught by such a terrible teacher.

The friendships so far are great, too - I loved the way you wrote the conversation between Mikey and Effy, because it seemed really realistic and natural. And the gossip about Dalia and James was certainly interesting - though of course Effy has no idea it's actually about her...

Sian :)
For the HPFF Review-A-Thon

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Review #5, by Sowersdithers 

2nd March 2015:
Rereading this whole thang because YOU HAVENT UPDATED so I decided to review for the first time on my favourite chapter and hope that u feel sorry for us peasants that are addicted to your royal like holy grain equivalent words
I literally feel like Macbeth and your lady Macbeth and u could tell me to kill Duncan and I totally would commit regicide for a chapter 11
If you haven't noticed I am PASSIONATE about flourescent adolescent like I ship jeffy so hard and the whole story is like a jumble of everything I want in a story (and my life)
You make me genuinely happy when I read about effy's life
Everything Is so reluctantly perfect and real and you may thing I'm over sucking up to you for a next chapter but I honestly think that if you wrote a book people would get a new perspective on how the simple and basic things in life are the most beautiful and wow I have a massive english assessment thing to hand in which is so important but I dont care because I need to review and express how good of a fanfiction and author u are. I'm scared youve given up on this story and thought it isn't good enough or youve for writers block of whatever this is PLEASE JUST REALISE THE MAGIC U GIVE US the sort of Magic I felt when I read the real Harry potter
I'm sorry if this review was a little crazy but honestly I hope you see this soon and don't abojdon this story because IT is the best THE EPITOME OF LITERATURE (okay Defo over doing it now) but you know what I mean
Well wishes;)

Author's Response: i'm so so sorry this reply is coming so late, and i'm so sorry the next chapter update is even later! i can actually not believe you haha, are you for real? thanks again- i'm so overwhelmed!!

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Review #6, by lalaland 

28th February 2015:
“How do you spell communism in Mermish?” I asked.


a rather exceptional line
mermish may be my favourite thing that has ever been created in fan fiction thus far love it love you
can't wait to read chapter 3

Author's Response: thank you so much! i hope c3 doesn't disappoint :)

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Review #7, by MissMoneypenny 

28th October 2014:
"can you stop being so fascist, thomas?"
can you stop being so hilarious please
no but seriously this chapter made me laugh out loud on more than once occasion and i love love love the way the plot is developing aLSO jj oh my god jj is on point
and you represent people so well!! and school!! like idk if you're british or not but this is actually what british schools and teenagers are like and just tHANK YOU for getting it across because it's something you don't see often

Author's Response: im just so so glad you're liking this as i've kind of forgotten about FA but it's honestly reading this which is making me question why i ever left this story to begin with! i'm still in the british secondary school system so everything i write truly is from experience, i really dont think british school gets the media and tv etc coverage it should be getting apart from skins and waterloo road which is suuch a shame so yeah im just so happy you're liking this. thanks so so so much for the review xxx

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Review #8, by hedera 

6th July 2014:
Hello again! Here's another House Cup 2014 Review!
Okay first off I feel like I have to comment on your Chapter Image; Cute boy + Cuter dog= happy Astrid. I also love the chapter title, so I feel like we're starting on good terms!
Your writing continues to be very strong! I think it's actually quite difficult to give you a longer review because a.) there's very little to criticise and b.) there's a lil voice in my head going 'read on to the next chapter... do it... do it now... stop with this incoherent typing learn more about EFFY' but I must NOT do that! I really want to leave you a good review and I'll probably end up leaving a mediocre one but, y'know...
I really liked her attitude to History of Magic at the start of the chapter- how she was interested in the subject but the teacher wasn't that great, that's something that I feel a lot so I could definitely somewhat identify with her there.
Also I laughed at the 'you'll always be a solid 8 in my eyes' line- definitely something I can imagine a lot of my male friends saying!

Author's Response: hey! welcome back!
urgh, your reviews kill me. i so do not deserve this. you are definitely too kind. yeah, mikey is based off my guy friends- i'm glad your male friends are the same! like, it's relatable.
i hope the next chapter doesn't disappoint! thanks again for another gorgeous review xxx

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Review #9, by icingonmycake 

13th June 2014:
Hey! This won't be a long review because I literally have a train to catch, but let me just say that I am very excited to see where this story goes. I really love the addition of new characters. I like thedetails you put in. Now my mother is about to murder me, goodbye

Author's Response: have fun!! thanks again for reviewing, and i hope you like the next chapters as much as you've like the first two! xxx

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Review #10, by DoctorUnderwood 

4th June 2014:
I'm really interested in seeing where this is going. Obviously it's a James/OC ship so Effy (also, love the name) won't be with the younger Potter...

Good chap!

Author's Response: I actually really like the name Effy too! But that's probably just down to my obsession with the Skins series. Thank you so much for reviewing, means a lot!!!

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Review #11, by Lycanthropelupin 

22nd April 2014:
Omg a hahahahaha mermish that made me laugh so much I can just see all these students being forced to learn mermish and wailing and stuff like we have to learn Spanish and German haha that's really creative
Well done your a great writer and I love this story! More James/effy scenes please!! I want her to make him jealous It would actually make me squeal haha! Lots of love coxoxooz

Author's Response: ahahaha yeah it was all based after a terrible french lesson! thank you so much for your generous comments, they made my day! plenty more james and effy coming up lol xx

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Review #12, by darkvadersdaughter 

18th April 2014:
i ship effy with so many people omg
i love her with james the most obviously
but you should so make james jealous with another character like liam or indigo it would be amazing
or even albus?
james is my favourite character ever and jealousy on boys is just too cute

Author's Response: ahaha thanks for that- and thanks for the review :)

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Review #13, by DumbledoresArmyOfOne 

14th March 2014:
Ah I love how realistically you write highschool like literally every scene you describe I'm like, yeah, that could happen. So yeah, thanks for actually making what you write plausible and for these awesome characters.
Can Oscar be my best friend?

Author's Response: i'm so glad you think this is accurate- i'm still in the british high school so all i write is experience (as experienced as i can get, because i don't go to boarding school and i'm not magic hahaha) but yeah ahhh so happy it's relatable!! bea xx

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Review #14, by Zqad 

9th January 2014:
I am giddy! *squees*
These too chapters were just all sorts of fun. I love Effie and I think you're doing a solid job of fleshing out all the side characters too.
I will confess I am SO glad this is not going to me a 'triangle' tale, couldn't bear with poor Al having his heart broken not to mention I think love triangle's are just a load of needless angst.

Only one scene with James and already the chemistry was fantastic. Can not wait for the next chapter so please update soon.

Author's Response: omg that is such a nice review, thank you for your lovely words!! ahh!! i'll update it once it's finished, i'm sorry i'm just so awfully slow at everything! thanks again- bea xxx

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Review #15, by LightLeviosa5443 

31st December 2013:
Hi! I'm here with your requested review. I'm so sorry that it took me so long to get back to you!

This was a really good chapter, I think you have really good characterisation and you keep your OC's very close to the personalities you initially established with them.

Interesting, so James might like Effy, Effy might like Albus, Albus might like Effy. I'm interested to see what you do with this, without making it a love triangle. It'll definitely be unique!

I just have one question, was does former mean? You say it in regards to what year people are in all the time. I just don't know what it means so I was a tad confused.

Anywho, this was a great chapter, aside from a couple of misplaced commas or periods, well done! Can't wait to read the next chap!

xoxo LL

Author's Response: thank you so much!! it's fine, honestly.
former means before- so, "troy and gabriella were both students, the former being a basketball player" would mean troy ahaha. sorry, i'm just watching hsm right now :')
thanks again! xx

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Review #16, by lilyandscorpius 

29th December 2013:
so good. please write more :)

Author's Response: thank you so much!

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Review #17, by lea_ 

23rd December 2013:
So many topics to cover!

1) I love little hints in stories, they kind of make my day so of course my favorite sentence in this chapter is: "He says that on the morning of our argument he had encountered a girl who had really caught his eye..."

2) Then I got really sad when I read everything Al because a little annoyance of my mine is the surge of Al/OC/James stories because I think they're kind of weird. Like, I love my ex-bf's brothers but I could never imagine myself dating or kissing one, ya know? AWK.

3) But then all was redeemed when I read that this would not be a love triangle (THANK YOU).

4) But THEN I'm like, but what if it was a triangle? Am I Team Al or James? Because James is a bit of a tool at the moment but I could see him very redeeming as his character develops, but I really like Al right now... So I decided I'm Team Oscar because he's fabulous.

5) [more of an irrelevant side-note] 80s movies, what up! say anything has been, and will always be, my favorite movie in the world.

I love it & Happy Holidays!!

Author's Response: I JUST LOVE YOU. YOU'RE SO COOL. YOU RESPONDED TO THIS IN EXACTLY THE WAY I WOULD and also i just love "i'm a keeper"! okay so anyway ha sorry
effy is such a babe like do i need to say anything else and she's too pre-occupied eavesdropping on the two girls that she hadn't even registered that they were indirectly talking about her like good one effy
this so is not a love triangle urgh i was really hesitant putting in this sub plot of this chapter because i don't want people to be turned off at this story so early into it because of her brief thing with al! but it's so not a big thing THIS IS NOT A LOVE TRIANGLE
oscar is fab, i love him, oscar for president and all that jazz. but idk i love mikey he's a babe
and in regards to 80's movies no r u okay clueless is where it's at
thank you again! happy christmas xxx

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Review #18, by xTimexTurnerx 

22nd December 2013:
Here I am, back for chapter two!

I like all the interactions between people, but I feel like I'm going on a bit of a character overload. We've so far been introduced to: Effy, James, Albus, Oscar, Aspen, Danny, Mikey, Josh & Lucy Wood, Lara, Scorpius, Liam, Diala, Ophelia, Tommy, Benjamin, Callie, JJ, Jasmine, Pheobe Anderson, Professor Campbell, Professor Binns, Professor Longbottom, Theo, and Rose. Granted, some of these are minor characters but that's a lot for a reader to know! I'm getting a bit confused because I'm trying to keep everyone straight! I don't want the volume of characters to impact your ability to characterize them.

I'm liking the way information travels, always second hand or he heard or she heard, it's interesting because I feel like the matter of truth or validity will come up.

I felt like Effy's interest in a boyfriend came up very quickly, but I mean she's a teenage girl so, hormonal mood swings are to be expected.

I find the relationship between Effy and Mikey interesting, and he seems like a typical bloke but I wonder if he has any feelings for her or will again??

Off to a great start! Thank you for requesting reviews and I hope you re-request when the next chapter is up!!!


Author's Response: hi! thanks for your second review!
i wanted to write a book which reflects teenage life and to be frank, there are a lot of people in the average teenager's normal day. some characters- such as dahlia moss and mikey lancaster- will be developed, but others are just there for a scene or two as just faces and names. i hope it's not too confusing; maybe i'll go over it and aze some of them.
like you said, effy is a teenage girl and she's spent the past year in the shadow of her best friend's relationship being a major gossip source for the student body. i think she's been feeling this for a while but only now has she been able to vocalise it.
mikey is one of my favourite characters! i suppose you'll just have to see what happens between the two.
thanks again! bea xx

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Review #19, by Infinityx 

20th December 2013:
Hi again!

So there's not much I can say here. The flow is excellent and your writing style is something different and refreshing.

I found a couple of sentences in the beginning which were too long. You'd typed in commas in places where semicolons or full stops would have been more suitable. It's a minor issue, but if you feel like you want to change that then read through your chapter once, or PM me if you have any questions. :)

Other than that, it was a really good chapter.
Happy writing!

- Erin

Author's Response: thanks so much for reviewing this again; i'm honoured that my writing is different and refreshing, i'm assuming this is a good thing? i'm taking it as a good thing!
i was in such a rush to have this published before the queues closed i suppose i didn't go over the beginning properly. now i'm reading it again, i see what you mean; thanks for pointing that out!
thanks again xx

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Review #20, by Ashley Lovegood 

20th December 2013:
gahhh update soon please!!!

Author's Response: wow thank u!!

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