23 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Historyrepeats 

6th May 2016:
Love that last line.
Excellent chapter and I liked seeing Jinx whose is a favourite in this story!

Author's Response: Thank you so much! I love Jinks too :)

 Report Review

Review #2, by bittersweetflames 

20th June 2015:
I didn't say this in my first review (because I had so many other things to say. lol) but I absolutely LOVE the way you have Molly dress (and fix her hair, obviously). She's just so cool and she obviously doesn't care what other people think of her. I mean, she's fit, she's fab and she's definitely no wallflower. You just manage to endear her to us without her being a sweet, overly saccharine type. I love that. Okay, so I love that we start off with a scene with Roxanne. In this scene all the questions we had from last chapter was answered: Why would she go for the Portrees and leave the Harpies? Will she take that risk? Is she the type who likes challenges instead of the safe? And, of course, these are all things Roxanne basically asks her. Of course, I have no idea who Hilarion is and how he and Lucy got together but it doesn't matter because you got the point across... They're conversation is just so natural that you can see these two cousins really do love and care for each other very much. And, haha, I love that Molly is basically an obsessive compulsive organiser. I feel that. SO HARD.
Okay, so Fitz is really interesting to me. Since he's an OC we don't even have a background to work with (unlike Molly, who's father and extended family we know) so I love the way you're developing him. And then there's Jinks. Goodie, he's hilarious. I love that he'd still be asleep one HOUR after he was supposed to report to practice. I don't know how he could handle that..I get twitchy even when I'm just a minute late.
And finally.. CONFLICT! Hahahaha... Fitz is basically CLUELESS at the whole coaching gig and you can just see that Molly is itching to help him (and, yes, Micromanage) but I guess they've both gotta learn how things go. I can't wait to see it! Brilliant. I don't need to say it twice.

House Cup 2015 Amazing Race Part 2, Ravenclaw

 Report Review

Review #3, by slytherinchica08 

3rd May 2015:
I love how much the characterizations are really shining through in this chapter. You can really tell that Molly much prefers to have things all in line for her, everything planned out and just as it should be. Where as Fitz is much more a take things as they come, bitter personality. Of course, he definitely has reason to be bitter considering the one thing that he really loved and enjoyed doing was taken from him.

I definitely find myself sympathizing with both of them, Molly in that Fitz really seems to just kind of shove her by the side feeling like she is just trying to step on her toes when really she just wants to help devise the best plans for a winning team. And I also understand why Fitz feels the way he feels. He wants to prove himself as well and doesn't want someone to come along and do his job for him.

I'm very much interested to see where this story will go and how these characters who were thrown together with half the amount of training time will be able to pull through the season. It will also be very interesting to see how things will progress between our two main characters and how they will be able to put aside the bitterness that they both hold for each other at the moment. And it also seems like there is going to be another wild card in this story as well, in the shape of one of the reserve players.

Anyways, this was another great chapter and I really enjoyed it. I'll be along to read and review the next chapter soonish!


 Report Review

Review #4, by UnluckyStar57 

1st August 2014:
...Did I forget to mention that we're having a day in your honor to celebrate all the hard work you've done for HPFF? Well, we are! Don't think that it hasn't gone unnoticed by the QTR editors, Ravenclaw House members, and other people on the site at large. As such, you deserve parades and medals and things like that, because you keep things running smoothly. Like, I hardly know how to use a tad bit of HTML coding for posting stories; I have no idea how you can do so much on this big, mysterious internet-thing. But I am ever-so-grateful for it. :D

Okay, so in this chapter it's pretty obvious that Molly and Fitz are polar opposites. I probably didn't pick up on it before, but she's got some serious organizational skills--to the point of OCD, almost. The Harpies' scheduling and drill setting is what she's used to, but Fitz isn't giving her that. And so, instead of sitting around and doing nothing, she goes and does something about it. Yay for her! Fitz's future temper issues are definitely foreshadowed here in his annoyance about Molly's takeover of the first practice.

One of the best things about this story is the tone. You balance tension with lightheartedness very well, and it is already clear that while romance will play some role in the story, it will mostly be about the rebuilding of a Quidditch team. That's really brilliant, and it's cool to think about how far the team has come in nineteen chapters (since I've read them already...). Seeing them in their humble beginnings again is really fun. :D


 Report Review

Review #5, by patronus_charm 

1st August 2014:
Hi again!

Ok, I love the fact that you made Molly and Roxanne close friends in this story as these two never get any screen time in next gen stories, especially not together so this was really great. Another thing I really liked was just their general banter and how easily they bounced off of one another and I cant wait to see more of them later on.

This line Well, I won't be trotting off and marrying any musicians like you or professional Quidditch players like Lucy. I'm still chasing the same dream. Star Keeper. I'm just going to do it for another team, that's all. Woah Molly has some sass and I really love how her character is emerging. Another thing I liked was that though she seemed a bit chilled and relaxed now and then, when her thoughts turned to Quidditch she really was passionate about it which was nice to see.

So am I sensing some potential ♥ from Fitz in regards to Molly here? But anyhow, I really loved seeing them together and how Fitz wasnt quite sure how to deal with Mollys out there character and threat to go and round the others out of their bed.

Another fab line My family's rather large and 'Weasley' is so non-specific. ♥ I dont know why this was so great, it just was!

Anyhow, this was another fab chapter and I cant wait to read on :D


 Report Review

Review #6, by AlexFan 

24th July 2014:
Molly may have a mohawk that's brightly coloured but her colour coordinated clothes scream Percy Weasley to me. I love how even though she's really punk you can still see a little bit of family resemblence on her.

I can see why Molly is so unimpressed with Fitzroy. I get that he's he's nervous and he doesn't want to work with a bunch of newbies but come on, he needs to start pulling it together if he's going to make them a top notch team. I'm surprised that the man isn't a Gryffindor because he has an awful lot of pride standing between him and that colour coded schedule of hers that would probably help him out to be honest.

If he's going to work with Molly then Fitzroy is going to have to pick up his game because she's the daughter of Percy Weasley and we all know what Percy's like. I have a feeling that Molly is going to accidentally end up controlling the practices because she's going to be irritated with the way that Fitzroy runs things.

And on a side note, I smell a ship growing.

 Report Review

Review #7, by Veritaserum27 

12th July 2014:
Hello, hello!

Wow. Molly sure does like her color coding, doesn't she? She seems to be a bit neurotic - what with getting to practice so early, starting the team on drills without the coach and coming up with her own training schedule. I'm afraid her ambition is going to get her into trouble. Nobody likes a know-it-all. I was curious about this line referring to Roxie: Well, possibly married. There had been a wedding on a beach, but whether or not there had been a marriage license seemed an entirely different question.. Was that part of another story? It sounds pretty funny. I'll have to read it. I am very suspicious about Fitz's injury. It seems like there might be a bit of mystery brewing. Someone REALLY didn't want him to play and I'm wondering if that person is going to come back when they find out he is the head coach of The Pride of Portree. On to the next chapter!

House Cup 2014 Review

 Report Review

Review #8, by TidalDragon 

12th July 2014:
Hello again!

Ahh the clash begins! I had a sense that Molly's determination to succeed was going to collide with Fitz's fixation on proving himself. The good part is I thought the clash was realistic, taking place in their heads at the moment. I'm interested to see if the pair can learn together and to find out what happens with the captaincy - will he deny Molly that because of their budding differences?

While developing all that, I thought you did a great job depicting the attitudes and lackadaisical approach that individuals at a bottom-dwelling club might actually take. I think it's realistic based on the anecdotes you here about teams in our sports when they're not doing well. I used to have an old boss who pounded the saying "speed of the leader, speed of the pack" into our heads though, so I'm hoping that between Molly, Zara, and Fitz - they can get this ship straightened out.

I think my favorite part of the story so far is how authentic it feels. Honestly, it reads quite like a real book so far! Kudos on that!

See you next chapter!

House Cup 2014 Review

 Report Review

Review #9, by marauderfan 

10th July 2014:
Hahaha, I love that despite Molly's outward appearance, she is still rather Percy-like in her sense of organisation - like her compulsion to keep all the bottles properly colour-coded, and the sense that if she's later than ten minutes early, then she's late. I laughed at the part where she volunteered to go wake up the missing players who slept in late, as well - she definitely would make a no-nonsense captain who gets everyone in line, that's for sure!

What a disaster of a first practice :-/ Honestly though, I can't blame any of the characters for acting as they are (well... maybe except for Jinks, who is just lazy). Molly might have been undermining Fitz' position by ordering everyone else on the team around, but she also really just wants the team to succeed and this is finally her chance. And Fitz is struggling to keep some authority over his hodge-podge team and obviously wouldn't appreciate some entitled girl doing his job for him. You've set up a really great and believable conflict between your characters already and it's only two chapters in!

I am loving this story so far and would love to keep reading but it's quite late at night so I'll be back tomorrow :P

House Cup 2014 Review

 Report Review

Review #10, by nott theodore 

9th July 2014:
Hello again!

Ah, this was another fantastic chapter! Which is now making me question why I haven't read any of your work before, because I love your writing style in this. It's just so easy and enjoyable to read and I get sucked right into the story.

It was nice to see Roxanne there with Molly - supposedly helping her - at the beginning of the chapter, since I don't feel like she's a character we see often. And then it was good to get a hint of their relationship too, because Roxanne was obviously concerned for Molly and wanted to make sure that she was doing the right thing and hadn't just made a spur of the moment decision.

I loved the bossy side to Molly's personality that came through here - even if she is a bit of a punk, there are still elements of Percy Weasley in her! The colour coding of everything made me laugh, as did the fact that she turned up with an armful of training schedules for the coach to look at, even though she's only just joined the team. I feel like there's going to be a lot of tension between Molly and Fitz in future chapters, although admittedly, they probably need a better schedule than working one day at a time...

Sian :)
Gryffindor House Cup 2014 Review

Author's Response: Thanks so much! I'm glad you're enjoying the story and my writing :)

Roxanne and Molly both seem to be more uncommon as focal characters go in Next Gen. Lucy too. People love to write about Rose and the Potters. And Victoire and Dominique to some extent, though Rose, Albus, and James seem to be the big three there. Funny that. I haven't really written the Potter boys much, just as brief appearances, since there's already so much about them it seems unnecessary. At any rate, Molly and Roxanne both appeared in a few chapters of the Midnight Run stories and Rose notes they're besties, and so I continued with that here (and in Roxanne's story).

Molly is definitely a bit of her dad. She likes to be organized and neat and in general is borderline OCD about having things spick and span, and she's good at being in charge of things. She was definitely turning it up a bit with the training schedules, but yeah, Fitz is a mess at this point. He has no idea what he's doing as coach, poor guy, and no idea how to learn what to do.

Thank you for the review!

 Report Review

Review #11, by PolyJuice_ 

29th June 2014:
Aaah, I like Molly - she colour codes! But oh my, I was right. She and Fitz certainly have a little bit of tension. (And a little bit of UST, if I might add. She was totally checking him out.)

I really love this story. ;w; I'm totally supposed to be cleaning the house, but why do that when I can read amazing FF?

But seriously, Molly. Lay off the plans - you just got on the team, don't anger the coach. tut tut.

The bit at the start with Molly and Roxanne was cute, I love fluffy girl talk.

Amazing chapter~


Author's Response: She's a bit OCD. Big time. They are definitely feeling some UST here! I do love some romcom drama.

Cleaning is entirely overrated! I need to clean today too but I want to write instead. We'll be slackers together.

She jumps right into bossing people around, despite having just got there. That's Molly for you.

Molly and Roxanne are best buds. There's a similar scene between them in Sparks, from Roxanne's POV. I like writing friendship ;)

Thank you so much for reviewing!

 Report Review

Review #12, by LightLeviosa5443 

15th April 2014:
Hi again! (because what's a review without a proper greeting?)

This just gets better and better. I think I'm just going to keep reviewing the same way I did last time, because there's absolutely zero CC I have for this wonderful wonderful story. Plus, I think I love it too much to catch anything wrong, anyway. And it's an excuse to read it twice. ;)

Before I even start commenting on the story, I just want to mention that I love your use of minor next-gen characters. I'm guilty of not using enough of them, and I love that this wonderful wonderful story is featuring some. Okay. Story, right. That thing I'm supposed to be reviewing. I love that Roxanne in the beginning is making sure that Molly is doing what she wants to do. I'm really enjoying this loving, cousinly relationship between the two, and it's nice to see that Molly isn't hated. I also really really love that she's not helping, at all. Just watching Molly pack. So cute, that Lucy married the guy Roxanne wanted to marry, and Roxanne married his best friend, I feel like that happens a lot to people I know. So perfect.

Oh gosh. Laughing SO hard at the liquor comment. Priceless priceless priceless. Molly has a rational side, and I love it. I love that she's the Molly I've always imagined (head girl, prefect, etc etc), but she's also this quidditch loving, weird enthusiast who gets along with some of her cousins. Your characterization is just so lovely.

Ex-harpy but still mohawked. Perfect description. I love that he called her pretty. Or thought she was pretty. Whatever, you get what I mean! Oh, I just assumed that she got the captain position. I didn't think she had to earn it. That makes sense though, duh, people have to earn things. I'm interested in seeing how this goes down.

Awe, I wanted to hurt him when he got mad at her and yelled at her. But now that he's shown he's insecure and feels inadequate I just want to go give him a monster hug. And tell him to love Molly forever, but that's getting ahead of the story. (and I have no idea if that's even where you intend on going with it.) I am so nervous that he's NOT going to make her team captain. That would just be so upsetting and heart breaking!!

Ugh. I'm inlove with the potential ship here. I love the way both Molly and Fitz thing. They're both so sassy and stubborn and determined. I think it's great, I'm loving this dynamic, even if right now it seems like they're going to potentially kill each other. A real conversation? Oh man, I don't know if my heart can handle this. OH WAIT THE RESERVES ARE COMING IN TODAY AND THAT MEANS THAT THE GIRL HE DOESNT WANT BACK IN HIS LIFE WILL BE THERE. I'M AFRAID.

I was waiting for that argument. I knew a conversation was too good to be true. I'm still afraid for that girl to show up. And I'm determined that Molly and Fitz will be a thing (Mitz, Folly?) I'm also holding my breath and praying that Molly gets Captain and that Fitz doesn't not make her captain purely because he dislikes her. Because that would be evil and mean and I'd probably cry. Okay, maybe not cry... Probably.

Lovely chapter. Again.

xoxo LL ♥

Author's Response: Hiya!

I love a minor character. They're fun to flesh out from what we know of them, and I feel like there's less fanon bits stuck in your head, kwim? Albus and James are everywhere, but there are a lot fewer Molly and Lucy stories. Roxanne and Molly are BFFs, so of course she checks up on her favorite cousin when she's making a huge career change ;) while not actually helping her pack haha.

Molly has a bit of an OCD side, yes. Control freak. I feel like that's the Percy in her, she wants everything to be just right and sometimes goes too far with it. But she's also more of a "cool" type like Bill, with the mohawk and professional athlete and such.

Aw of course he thinks she's pretty! I love romance. This pairing is in my head now and I need to write them into togetherness. The fun is in getting there.

Poor Fitz, he doesn't know what he's doing and he covers it up with yelling and gruffness. And so of course he butts heads with control freak Molly.

Mariah arrives next chapter! Thank you so much for the review ♥

 Report Review

Review #13, by QkStephen 

4th January 2014:
I like it. your style is intruiging

Author's Response: Thanks very much! :)

 Report Review

Review #14, by Secret Santa-Claw 

17th December 2013:
Good tidings, momotwins :) Secret Santa-Claw back with another Yuletide review!

I'm loving your portrayal of Molly Weasley even more after this chapter. I saw more and more of Percy in her here - being so organised, punctual, particular and bossy... But I find her far more likeable than I found her father in the books :) I confess, I was a bit disappointed she had changed her hair back to it's natural red though, I was hoping she'd have made it purple (my favourite colour ;) if I was magical I'm sure I'd have supported the Prides just for their colour scheme hehe)

Hee, I really liked the interaction between Molly and Roxanne in the opening scene, it had me giggling :) I love that you have made the two of them close; in a short space you have portrayed a really strong relationship between them which is extra nice because I've only really seen Molly in fanfic as an outsider of the family. So, in my opinion, it is a refreshing take on the character.

Already we've got some of the backstory on Fitz :) yay! When I mentioned it in the last review I did not expect to see it so soon, I thought I'd be kept waiting. And the snippet of Roxanne's back story has made me want to read the Midnight Run trilogy :D *adds stories to her reading list* I'll finish what's up of this first though!

Going back to Molly, I loved that she was not impressed by Coach Slapdash - of course someone so organised would be less than enamoured by someone so unorganised and unprepared! The way she acted with him was great. I felt for Fitz in this chapter though; he is trying to find his feet and become established in his new role and then he has Molly trying to immediately take over and other team members being recalcitrant (that is a great word by the way, I had to look it up but now I have a new word in my vocabulary - which is always good ;)) that can not be easy for him!

This was another great chapter and I look forward to reading on :)

- Secret Santa-Claw ♥

Author's Response: Hi again! :) She really is a lot like Percy. Not a clone, but a lot of similarity. Her sister is much less so. And don't worry, the purple will make an appearance. She's removed the Harpies green but isn't totally sold on Prides purple yet.

Molly and Roxanne, in my Next Gen world, are BFFs, so in "Sparks" and the Midnight Run stories, they had a few scenes of their mutual-teasing sort of relationship. Molly is quite busy with her career but is close with her cousins - they're a tight-knit bunch in my version. Lucy's more of a loner, actually. After Victoire (as the eldest of the grandchildren and a natural earth mother type), Molly is the default leader of the group - it's in her nature to take charge.

Anyway, yes some of his backstory appears! Roxanne's backstory is only a little bit in the first two Midnight Run novels (brief mention in JAMR, and a few scenes in AWSOM), and mostly it's "Sparks". It's Roxanne's and Lucy's story.

Nope, Molly's obsessive need for order does not leave room for being impressed by Coach Slapdash. And he, being a fly-by-the-seat-of-his-pants person by nature, is not impressed with Molly's OCD organization or her urges to be in charge of everything.

Thank you so much for the review! I'm really glad to hear you liked these chapters, and I hope you like the rest! If you get a chance to finish reading, I'd love to hear what you think of the rest of the story. :)

 Report Review

Review #15, by CambAngst 

17th October 2013:
Hello, again!

I really liked the way you started to flesh out your characters in this chapter. At least one major conflict started to emerge and the team dynamic started to come together just a bit. To be so early in the story, it was impressive how much I felt like I learned.

Roxie was a great foil for starting to draw out Molly's obsessive need for structure and order. It's obviously not Roxie's style and the compulsive need that Molly seems to have for organization creeped her out a little. I absolutely loved the idea of Molly color-coding her liquor cabinet. It cracked me up to an almost irrational extent.

Moving along to the practice, it was pretty obvious that Molly and Fitz were going to butt heads. It's odd that even though I think Fitz is meant to be relatively young and very handsome, I have this mental imagine of a middle-aged man with a hang-dog appearance. I'm thinking Henry Winkler in The Water Boy, actually. It's mostly just because of Fitz's approach to coaching. He's in so far over his head, yet he's too proud and too stubborn -- possibly also too scared -- to accept help when it's right in front of him. For what it's worth, I have a premonition about who's going to end up being team captain and I don't think it's Molly.

You did a great job of using the dynamics of the team practice to start developing personalities for the other players. You can see all sorts of little conflicts that will need to be overcome for the Prides to be a good team. I'm wondering whether you watch a lot of sports movies in real life, because the set-up feels so familiar to me.

Once again, I couldn't find a thing wrong with your writing. Everything flowed beautifully and there wasn't a typo or grammatical problem in sight. Kudos for awesome editing!

Great job with this chapter. I'm really starting to enjoy this story!

Author's Response: I'm glad it's coming together! Writing sports stories is different for me, so I'm trying to just think of it as a romance only and cross my fingers and hope for the best when I start writing their games.

Roxanne and Molly are besties, and Molly featured several times in "Sparks". It was fun to show their continuing friendship, this time from Molly's POV. She and Roxanne like to tease each other. Roxy wasn't creeped out - Molly's colour-coding is sort of well-known among the Weasleys - she just likes to rib her about it. Molly famously colour-codes everything. ;)

I've never seen "The Water Boy". He's definitely a younger guy, in his late 20s. Molly's age. He really has no idea what he's doing as coach. He hardly got to learn anything from Rodan, who barely coached anyway, before Rodan was fired, and as a player, Fitz never paid enough attention to what anyone else was doing. He focuses too much on the Chasers as a result, since it's what he knows.

I can't say I've seen a lot of sports movies, but I've definitely seen a few. "Mystery Alaska" is one of my all-time favorite movies, though. I'm sort of challenging myself with this story, outside my comfort zone. Thank you so much for the wonderful review and kind words, it really means a lot!

 Report Review

Review #16, by Hope's Mom 

3rd October 2013:
Molly does need to shake him! Molly is offering to help him get organized - which he has not done at all yet! Some people would rather appear unprepared than accept help apparently. They will be interesting to watch (read). Will Mariah appear in the next chapter? Thank you!

Author's Response: He's a very prideful guy. He really should let her help, but he wants to do it all himself. If only he knew what he was doing! Thanks for the review!

 Report Review

Review #17, by TheGoldenKneazle 

2nd October 2013:
Ooh TENSION ♥ I am completely adoring this chapter with all the training and the sparks between Fitz and Molly. All the team players so far are so fabulous, I'm expecting funny things from them, and also you always manage a fantastic balance between muggle and magic on naming people (I struggle with it!) Plus, all Molly's neurotic tendencies are making me feel more normal :P I am so looking forward to more Molly and Fitz development next chapter (hopefully with less of their irritating each other this time eep!)

Author's Response: lol. Tension! I love me some romantic tension. Even if it starts out as "oooh you're a jerk" tension. ;) Molly is rather neurotic. And she and Fitz are bound to clash, such opposite leadership styles. Perhaps "leadership" would be a better way of putting it for Fitz, at least for now. haha. Thanks so much for the review!

 Report Review

Review #18, by navyfail 

22nd September 2013:
I love seeing Molly's organized and controlling side. It is very realistic and amusing. Also meeting the team and Roxanne was nice. They all seem to have different personalities.

Great chapter.

Author's Response: She's very type A. A bit OCD, even. Pathologically organized ;) I try to make sure everyone has a distinct personality, even when they've got a lot in common. Thank you so much for reviewing!

 Report Review

Review #19, by missdagane 

19th September 2013:
I love the midnight series and this fic make no exception. I love the humour, the way you describe the carachters and this universe. Can't wait to have news of the other characters of the serie, like Hyperion and others.

Author's Response: Thank you so much! :D I'm glad you're liking the series. I'm having a good time writing it so I'm glad to hear people enjoy it. There will definitely be cameos from the "Sparks" cast. Lucy is, after all, Molly's sister ;)

 Report Review

Review #20, by ThestralPrincess 

16th September 2013:
lol, I can imagine her shaking him anyway, whether there are witnesses or no. i love Molly's OCD, its so at odds with her fashion style, its hilarious.

Author's Response: Heh. She'd be really tempted to do it anyway, but she doesn't know the team yet and wants to look professional. She's so OCD. Her leather clothes are pristine ;) Thanks for the review!

 Report Review

Review #21, by Gryffin_Duck 

15th September 2013:
Molly is awesome. I am loving all the interactions between her and Fitz. I kind of feel sorry for Fitz, who clearly has no idea how to be a coach, but he ought to put aside his pride (pun totally intended) and let Molly help him. Together they could get the team into shape.

Yikes, injured by a fan. I hadn't expected that. It's one thing to get permanently injured from Quidditch, but from a fan? That's much worse.

I really like the team so far, especially the lazy Seeker. Can't wait to see how he reacts to Molly's training (because I have a feeling Molly is going to take charge despite Fitz's not wanting her to). Great chapter! :)

Author's Response: I feel bad for him, too. He really has no idea what he's doing, the poor guy, he just can't admit it. Molly's a naturally take-charge person, so she'll definitely be helping whether he wants her to or not. Jinks is growing on me ;) I'm glad you like him and the rest of the team. Thank you for reviewing!

 Report Review

Review #22, by MissesWeasley123 

14th September 2013:
Okay, Molly is now my favourite next generation Weasley.

She colour codes her drinks! That is so awesome. Literally, I was almost dying from laughter at that part!

Ahem, okay, I seem to have jumped into the middle of the chapter, so let me retrace my steps :)

I really loved your characterization of Roxanne. She, like Molly, is a little forgotten about and we don't typically get to read her a lot. But I loved this new angle you show her at: she reminds me of like a hardcore chick you would find in a all male biker gang... she's just so cool and literally awesome. I loved the quirks about her and Hilarion and his brother and how Molly was unsure whether or not they had actually gotten "married". That was hilarious!

It's good to see that Molly does have a bit of Percy in her, she's kind of bossy but still very cool. Her little outrage at having to "micromanage" the team was quite believable too.

Again, I think you're doing a fabulous job with this new WIP of yours, I always look forward to reading when I see you've updated!

Author's Response: Haha - Molly color codes everything she possibly can. She's rather type A. Pathologically organized. I originally wrote her that way because her cousin Rose is just the polar opposite, chaos incarnate, and when the two of them get together it's interesting (Rose's response to Molly's bathroom color coding, for example).

Roxanne is a writer. She's very boho hippie sort of type, though brash and sarcastic. She writes for the Daily Prophet and independent works. The story of Roxanne/Perry/Lucy/Hilarion is in "Sparks" ;)

Molly's definitely got the bossy gene. I think it's her grandmother as well, Molly the first, and her dad for sure. She's ambitious like Percy but all aimed at Quidditch rather than the Ministry. Not so much looking for power like Percy did, but looking for success. She didn't like being accused of micromanaging ;)

Thank you so much for reviewing! I'm really pleased you're enjoying it so far.

 Report Review

Review #23, by toomanycurls 

14th September 2013:
Really good fight between cousins. I like that Molly is pragmatic and focusing on her life as a quidditch player. I'm really enjoying the internal conflict as well as the character reveals you do here. This will sound weird, but the swearing you use is really good. Maybe it's because I'm from the US but I take two or ten tries at writing good insults that sound British.

The whole underdog team vibe is cool. I'm excited to see how the team develops in future chapters (or further in this chapter). Fitz and Molly have a ton of sparks between them (it's almost palatable).

I like seeing Fitz's insecurity and struggle to lead. It's very authentic.

"'weasley' is so non-specific" cracked me up

I really like their argument over training. They remind me of Bones and Booth (from the show Bones). The competitive but flirty behavior is awesome.

I'll keep an eye out for more of this!!

Author's Response: Heh. They do heckle each other. More of that is seen in "Sparks", from Roxanne's POV (and Hilarion's, who is rather afraid of Molly). Ah thank you so much - I'm American too and I try to make it sound British, though I know I will probably never manage to write like a native. That's ok, I make an effort.

Fitz is having a tough time. He knew how to be a star player, but he never had to lead a team without being able to demonstrate what they need to do. His shoulder is really a problem. More on that later. ;) I'm glad the sparks came across! I love a romance. They'd be flirty if they would stop butting heads. Maybe a bit flirty while they butt heads. ;)

Heh - Molly's a bit snarky. "Weasley" is rather non-specific though, there's so many of them. Thank you so much for reviewing!

 Report Review
If this is your story and you wish to respond to reviews, please login
Add a Review