10 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Libbypotter 

23rd March 2017:
True love never did run smoothly. I am so sorry for him though

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Review #2, by Roisin 

19th March 2015:
BAHAHAHAHA. "I'm not angry, I'm disappointed" is such a mum line, and it's SO great to apply something so banal to such an extraordinary situation. Extraordinary is kind of their mundane, isn't it?

HAHAHAHAHAHA, oh man! Harry and Ron chipping in was BRILLIANT. Like, such a cute mate-moment, it gave me fuzzies. I can really see them off to the side on Hermione's end. LOVE!

(Also, the 'you'd be just as angry if Al--' thing, because the implication is that he WOULDN'T. It really reinforces Al's previously mentioned Complex).

ĎI think in my husbandís eyes that makes him a wise man,í--*snort laugh*

SUCH good timing on Hector Flynn! AH! You are a genius craftswoman of storytelling!

It's good that, just as Hector wakes up, Rose is genuinely more concerned with his well-being. She's allowed to like Scorpius, but of course she wouldn't wish ILLNESS upon her current boyfriend.

'Malfoy kept scoring and it was bloody awfulí--so, so clever.

Rose's guilt is really well done, and you do a wonderful job of putting her in an impossible situation. Like, of COURSE she wouldn't want to tell him and break up with him while he's still bedridden. There really isn't any easy solution for her.

'it was a good ten minutes before she wiped her eyes'--nice. I like that you imply that she was crying after-the-fact rather than describing it head on.

ĎI canít! Or, if you want to nitpick, I wonít. And Iím not going to lie to him, eitherí--everything about this line gives me a huge amount of respect for Rose. I really like that I totally understand where both of them are coming from, and yet there is still a conflict that is impossible not to exist.

Oh man, the 'looking like a Malfoy' thing stings! Well done with that.

And Scorpius being horrible to Methy and Selena is kind of brilliant--like, he's being HORRIBLE, but you give us enough reason to understand where his head is at that it doesn't make us lose sympathy. Plus, there's that whole 'serving the story' business you have going on. His ranting about why she's stupid is another example of your brilliant use of multiple POV--it reinforces what the reader thinks is valuable about her and Methy's alliance. And I just really like how 'whatever, shoo' she is about it.

GUH, Scorpius' agonizing angst is so well written. He's so self-loathing/effacing/destructive. SO MANY FEELS HAVE I.

His conversation with Albus is great, because no character in this story ever feels like a prop for a Main Character. Like, they are talking about one thing, but each of them are /really/ talking about different things. In every interaction, each character is bringing something to the table rather than just being a sounding board for the others.

SO GOOD *mashes hands on keyboard*

Author's Response: Certainly by now, there is no such thing as mundane for the Wotter brood. And Hermione has to use the weapons in her arsenal, especially when undermined by Harry and Ron off-screen.

I forgot I had even Al's parents knowing he's such a goodie-two-shoes. Poor kid.

Rose is in a rubbish spot. I'm not really sure what her right thing was supposed to be, and I put her in this situation. Also, it was easier to describe her coming out of a well-deserved bursting into tears than explaining it blow-by-blow. Though that would have been a bit redundant, I guess. We all know why she'd cry. She cries. She needs a good cry. She picks herself back up again.

Scorpius' worst trait is lashing out at people when he's upset. He is absolutely a petty child when this happens, and it's just as well Selena can see it or she might have actually been affected by his words. But she can tell he's just throwing things around to try to regain some control of the situation, so she's not having ANY of it.

Odd/good that you say no character is a prop for Main Character, because Albus was created so much as Scorpius' foil that I do get accusations of him being under-developed and the least interesting of the whole cast. I like to think he's just subtler, and this is one of those conversations where what's going on under the surface with him does come into rumbling play.


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Review #3, by Siriuslover177 

20th June 2014:
Why... why? Why did Scorp have to do that... the one person who has ALWAYS been there for him. He is so stupid... how did he think that was going to end up? There is only so much Al can put up with, and he just had to mess it all up.

And Rose? Why couldnt she judt do it... well, I know why. But still. And then she just had to fight with him...

And I thought this chapter was going to be when they finally really get together):


Author's Response: Scorpius, when hurt, lashes out. Hurts others so they can share his pain, hurts others before they can hurt him. It's a juvenile thing to do, but it's what he does, regrettably. He may learn, some day, to curb it, but for now he's made his life worse.

Rose is in a terrible situation. Though she's not handling it IDEALLY. I'm not sure what the ideal is, mind.

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Review #4, by rozen_maiden 

30th October 2013:
Huh... Despite what Scorpius thinks, the scene with Hector and Rose had me completely on edge with worry that she was going to tell Flynn about her and Scorp. Not really the time or place, and I'm glad that she didn't. But, Scorpius was upset about it, a lot, which brings me back to the huh and thought of Miranda and Flynn ... His clear hatred towards Hector *does* go beyond that schoolboy rivalry, and I if I remember correctly, you may have mentioned before about Miranda cheating on Scorpius with Flynn ..?
Hmm, a hard situation for the young Malfoy. So very different from his father and grandfather, yet clearly a Malfoy - and I love that. I love that you haven't just made him completely different and better than what his ancestry is. He slips between brave and bitter fluently, and, man, did it really come out in this chapter. As I was reading the Jones, Selena and Scorpius scene, I was just cringing with the anger he was unleashing .. But Selena: "Did I stutter, Malfoy?" Ha! What a girl. She surprises me every chapter.
Ugh, and the part with Albus. That is sad ... I just hope that Scorpius can look back and see what Albus was trying to say about himself always being there for Scorp.

As much as I love the romance in this story, I really feel like it back burns with the amazing plot, and the curious - exceptionally curious - appearance of Thane. I can't even begin to guess his intentions or goals... He is the perfect picture of a psychopath without the title to go with, and barely knowing anything about him, I'm hesitant to say he's a psychopath. Though they have been through his file, I still feel like I know nothing about him. And to top it off - though it is probably completely irrelevant - I find it curious that he looks like a Malfoy. I know it is probably nothing, but it makes me uncomfortable nonetheless.

And the name Miranda! Honestly, I would never have picked up on that, as, like you said, they are completely different women. And I am more of a Dragon Age girl myself, but I had to sate my curiosity and ask nonetheless :)

Anyway, awesome as always. I'll be sad when it is over, but if you do write more, I'll be on that as fast as a cat on a mouse. In the meantime, I still have half the novel to go, so all is well :)

Author's Response: Rose can be thoughtless and unkind with it, but she's not quite that hapless. She wouldn't want to do that to Hector if she could help it. Not that she's in an ideal situation.

Scorpius has his reasons, which will get elaborated on in the future. I have, indeed, tried to find the ways in which he is a Malfoy to the bone, and then shift him around in others. While I don't think there are many Scorpiuses like my Scorpius, I shouldn't think he's completely alien to a lot of interpretations. For now he's intent on not being his father, his grandfather; some day he might see the positive aspects of his heritage, but... not yet. That's a WAY off, he has to become his own man first.

I'm glad Selena surprises. She, above all of them, is meant to have more to her than meets the eye! And yes, poor Albus gets much maligned in this chapter and we finally see him have enough of it.

I like romance, as you might tell, but I need my romance to be alongside a meaty plot to push the characters in extreme directions, and also to give them more to their lives than just the mushy. Characters in a romance must, for me, be complete individuals with their individually complete lives, and it's easier for that to happen with a firm plot. And I like plot!

Thane has his own motivations. You might question the psychopath assessment... we'll see! As for his looks, well. He does remind Scorpius of himself. A dark mirror, or something more sinister? We'll see.

I shan't lie, I'm more a DA girl too, but ME provided a solid source of inspiration for a three-act epic, the trilogy form and character and plot arcs which come with. We'll see if I can pull it off.

Plenty more to come! Thanks for reviewing.

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Review #5, by Penelope Inkwell 

23rd October 2013:
Well, ouch. I knew something was going to happen, but that was particularly awful. And the truth is, I canít really blame Rose. Itís been hinted that the person Miranda cheated with was Flynn, but Rose doesnít know that. She doesnít know how that makes it the worst possible romantic scenario for Scorpius, because heís hidden it (and again, he had his reasons). But it would make it hard on her.

As for Scorpius, I canít blame him for being upset with her, either. She did know what she was doing, and she might have a good reason, but considering that he *does* know Flynnís background, I can see why that would hardly be enough.

Finally, Albus. I feel for him. He really does mean to be responsible, but he gets so many mixed messages about that. And heís obviously had a lot of patience with Scorpius. However, I still think he was a bit unfair. Obviously heís the sort of moral paragon of the group, and heís let a lot roll off without a word, and Scorpius did pick the fight. But at the end of the day, even with his doubts, Albus is in a much better place than Scorpius is, and feeding his doubts about his self worth was just so awful, and unworthy of Al--he can do better than that. Sure, Scorpius started it, but I still think Al hit harder in the end, because Scorpius hasnít had a loving family to brush aside his doubts; they run deeper. But then, we all do reach a breaking point, and I suppose having such a long fuse only means that the explosion will be worse, when it comes.

Anyway, those are just my feels. So convoluted. Everyone is right. Everyone is so, so wrong.

Hopefully we can only go uphill from here?

Author's Response: Ooh, you picked up on the hints re: Miranda/Flynn! I'm so happy. It's not meant to be obvious, of course, but it was seeded. But, Rose doesn't have much of a choice. Her situation is pretty awful and she loses either way. But Scorpius, of course, is going to take this as badly as possible!

This was, yes, meant to be a time when Albus shows his weaknesses. It's disappointing, and he IS unfair, but he's pretty much at the end of his tether and has put up with a lot, and now Scorpius is taking something that has nothing to do with him, out on him. Also, poor Al has had to protect Scorpius basically for years and is feeling a little taken for granted. You're right, indeed. The long fuse does make the eventual fallout worse.

This is indeed one of the worst points it gets emotionally. But not THE worst, I fear. Thanks for reviewing!

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Review #6, by min 

22nd March 2013:
This chapter was great! You've made me a new fan of this pairing. This story is the first I've read in which Scorpius was written in such a realistic fashion. I can't wait to read more!

Author's Response: I admit I had to write a story where Scorpius wasn't the amazing, charismatic sex-god. This one just likes to think he is. Thanks for reviewing!

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Review #7, by water_lily43175 

20th March 2013:
"I'm not angry, I'm disappointed." Is there ANYTHING worse in the world than to be told that by a parent? But Rose handles the situation marvellously here. Of COURSE it's unfair that Hermione can have all of her misdemeanours turned back on her as Rose's excuse for doing something stupid ... but it IS rather like the pot calling the kettle black for Hermione to expect her daughter to sit safely in the castle instead of DOING something. It's just like Hermione, and indeed ANY mother, to ask that. Likewise, it's entirely in Ron and Harry's nature to congratulate Rose for being successful!

Aww, the trio thanking and congratulating Scorpius as well. That's cute. I love that Ron commends Scorpius for being scared of the big nasty spiders.

HAHA Lockett's going to try curing Hector. Well THAT'S not going to be awkward.

"I think those were my nightmares, actually, Malfoy kept scoring and it was awful..." Oh Hector. You have no idea.

BUT. Symptoms have been alleviated by this concoction, which can only be a good thing. Just a shame that Hector was one of the bunnies. Of COURSE Rose can't tell him RIGHT NOW that she wants to end things with him and hook up with his worst enemy. But that's not the answer that Scorpius wants to hear.

Oh, Scorp. The poor kid breaks my heart, he really does. He doesn't know how to help himself! I feel for him here ... but at the same time, he's being a total moron. He's just so used to people thinking badly of him that he's dependent upon never upsetting or disappointing Albus who's the only person who sees him for who he really is, and NOT just for being a Malfoy - and so poor old Albus thinks that he's being neglected or forgotten or even taken for granted when Scorp is just trying not to disappoint him. Aand of course, Scorpius fights fire with fire (appropriate metaphor methinks - is it a metaphor? Yikes, I feel as though my knowledge of the English language always falls apart around you!) and turns a bad situation into a TERRIBLE one. Not to MENTION his jibes at Methuselah and Selena. Way to alienate almost everyone still conscious in one fell swoop, Scorp. He's going to have a rough time of it next chapter, that's for sure. :(

BUT. I like how tensions are escalating within the group. Bad for Scorpius but certainly juicy for us readers - and besides, it's inevitable that things won't run smoothly with five teenagers all holed up in the same place with so little other company, especially with the rampant sexual tension and friendship insecurities thrown in to boot. Love it. LOVE IT.

Author's Response: Jeez I've been terrible at responding to reviews for months. *ploughs through backlog* Hermione is a hypocrite for telling off Rose for doing exactly what she did. That said, Hermione's also a mother now, and understandably wants a BETTER life for her children. Unfortunately, she's not getting it.

Poor Rose is in a bind in this situation. It even amuses me was the writer, because I'm really not sure myself what the morally right thing to do. Any option she takes will hurt someone, either by actively lying or more directly.

Thanks for reviewing!

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Review #8, by AriesGirl40 

20th March 2013:
If I were in Rose's shoes, I wouldn't have been able to do it either. That boy looked at her with hope of getting well with her on the job.
I can also see where Scorpius is coming from. He's been alone in this for so long, a loving shoulder to lean on could help alot right now.
Albus pegged Scorpius right. Scorpius needs to vent, but with lack of good candidates, Al is his stand in.
Loved the chapter, see you again soon!

Author's Response: Yeah, Rose is in a stinker of a position. So's Scorpius. It's rather hard to say what the right thing to do in that situation would have been. Can't say I know it myself, but that's the fun of the story! Thanks for reviewing.

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Review #9, by missdagane 

20th March 2013:
The xhapter was amazing, worth the wait. poor Scorpius, even if he deserves Al's reaction I feel sorry for him. PS: would you continue to post on other sites?

Author's Response: I do post this elsewhere and TRY to keep it up to date. Hopefully there shall be no more waits from here on! Thanks for reviewing.

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Review #10, by MadiMalfoy 

19th March 2013:
Wow that was intense!! The fact that Hermione didn't necessarily condemn Rose for going out and fetching the Acromantula skin without approval but merely scolded her and grudgingly conveyed Ron' and Harry's approval for her and Scorpius made me smile. It showed that Hermione trusts her daughter to an extent and realizes that Rose is nearly of age and is able to make most decisions for herself without getting into too much trouble. The touching scene between Rose and Hector and then the strain between Rose and Scorpius was brilliant! Before I continue rambling on about what you already know, phenomenal job with this chapter! :) I'm excited to see how everyone else reacts to the potion and what will happen if it counteracts Pheglethon and they all wake up! Ahh, fantastic job, once again! xx

Author's Response: Hermione would rather Rose didn't get herself into these disaster life-or-death situations. But she does, overall, accept that this is where she is and that Rose is smart and, well, that she couldn't have been stopped at her age.

Thanks for your kind words and for the review!

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