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13 Reviews Found

Review #1, by dreamgazer220 

15th August 2015:
Another great chapter! You write Tor so well; I love the flashbacks that show a tougher side to her, but you don't forget to add things that make her seem like a fourteen year old girl. Her crush on Terry is adorable, and Goyle is a git (both of them). Keep up the great work!!

Author's Response: Hello! :D Thank you, I'm so glad you like the story!! The characters have all been so much fun to write, and it's amazing to get such lovely feedback! ♥

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Review #2, by Liana 

5th February 2015:
I was afraid the poor toad was going to explode. The Bat Boogey Hex is Ginny's signature move. She seems to practice it indiscriminately.

Author's Response: Ah, I know! Poor toad. :( Part of the reason I originally included Ginny in the story was so that I could have her cast the Bat Bogey hex, it just seems so awful but also hilarious.

Thanks so much! :)


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Review #3, by Secret Santa ;D 

5th January 2015:
I was literally JUST thinking that maybe Griz was just angry Tor rejected her brother so blatantly. Although, any self-respecting witch would have done the same.

I am so shocked to see Pyxis saying all of this to Ron and Ginny. I know he would say all of this, but knowing that is totally different from actually reading it, apparently. I am just clutching my pearls and gasping all through this scene.

I'm truly disgusted with Goyle here.. I wasn't much of a fan of his before, but this is a new low for his character. As if forcing himself on her is going to help his chances. I was panicking right along with her, that scene was terrifying.

I'm so happy that it's Ginny that came to her rescue! Especially with her signature Bat Bogey Hex! I'm really hoping they become friends of some sort, even though that would be difficult to pull off given who her friends are. It's so awesome that Ginny helped Tor out even though she didn't necessarily like her.

Tor is so transparent with the classic 'asking for a friend' excuse :P It's hilarious that Ginny totally knows. And her statement about Tor being 'just a kid' is exactly what I've been thinking this whole time.

I can't believe Yaxley used the Imperius Curse on his own daughter! And at such a young age too…that would have terrified me. I do really want to know what he did when he was under the Imperius Curse, if he found it particularly terrible. That can't just be anything, considering that he's a Death Eater and must have a higher standard for what constitutes terrible.

Tor's group is surprisingly friendly when contrasted with how they treat people they don't like. I'm not surprised that Snape doesn't harp on too much about her being late, he's almost had that bias toward his Slytherin students.

I was really worried when Demetria was shouting at Tor, mostly afraid of what she might do. Luckily she only cast Levicorpus. It seems as though she already isn't quite so mean as the other students in her house. And Ginny coming to save the day again is so cool, especially because this time, she's saving someone else from Tor. I'm loving the way she's used in this story so far. Excellent work as usual.

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Review #4, by Becky Johnson 

5th November 2014:
Hi Lululuna, No wonder this story is a staff pick. Amazing. I have avoided reading anything about other characters before but this one caught my eye. And I have started scores but usually can't get past the bad grammar or other syntax problems. But not only is your story well put together, it is exciting and very good. A great read! I know this take tons of work and I certainly admire you for all this effort.

Author's Response: Hello! :)

Ahh, thanks so much! :) I'm so glad that you like this and that it's one of your first reads into other characters - there's so many amazing stories on this site. I'm so glad you think it's well put together - thank you so much for all these wonderful words, it really makes all the effort and time I've put in worth every second to get such a wonderful comment! :)


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Review #5, by Jess the Enthusiast 

21st September 2014:
Oh I really want Ginny and Tor to be friends! But I guess that won't be happening anytime soon...

And I really want to like some of Tor's friends like they have moments where they're really nice and cool, but then they do things like this. Which is why they're really great characters! They make the reader feel as conflicted as Tor is probably going to feel at some point in this story.

Great chapter! I felt so sorry for those first years!

Author's Response: Hi again!! I'm glad you think so - in a lot of ways they are quite similar, between being the youngest, wanting to stand out but not necessarily knowing how, and having a lot of pressure on their shoulders at this point in the story. Maybe not any time soon, but there's definitely potential. :)

Ah, I know what you mean! I'm glad you like them and think that they're good characters even if they are confusing and up and down with their morals. I like how you as the reader can notice how they can be problematic even though Tor hasn't realized yet.

Aw, I did too! Poor ickle firsties. :( Thanks so much!! :D


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Review #6, by Teddy1993 

3rd September 2014:
Great chapter again. I was surprised to see Ginny turn up, but you handled it very well. She seemed perfectly in character. First consoling Tor and later hexing her when she saw her tormenting a first year. Seems just like her :)

Author's Response: Hi again! Ah, I'm so glad you like my Ginny - she's one of my favourite canon characters to write so it's lovely though thought she was in character. Thanks so much!

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Review #7, by MissesWeasley123 

6th November 2013:
It's the fact that I suck that has taken me so long to come back. I am so sorry! :(

GINNY! I KNEW IT. LET ME BASK IN MY NOT-SO-INTELLIGENCE. For once, I liked her. Usually, I don't. I found Ginny as a character funny sometimes during the books, but mainly just boring. And kind of annoying. A lot of this chapter was her and Tor, and I really liked it. I think they both can be really nice friends.

Goyle is so rubbish lol. He's really awful, I feel bad for Tor. Out of all the people in the world who could have had a crush on her... It was him. Part human, part troll, and part food too.

The flashback was very intriguing, and like always, I can't wait to see how it all ties together. Like, she was put under the Imperius curse by her own father... That's really concerning, but I understand that. Poor Tor! :(

A really good chapter, I liked it!

Author's Response: Nadia! Don't feel bad at all, I'm just happy to receive this lovely review. :)

Haha you're so clever! Yeah it felt right that Tor and Ginny might cross paths. I'm glad you liked her, and I know what you mean about her being boring, but I loved the sassiness she had in the last couple of books and loved writing her into the story. And yes, they may not have a lot in common but the potential to get along quite well.

Agh, Goyle. I sort of feel bad for doing that to Tor now. Sometimes. But he does provide some comic relief on occasion. Part food?! I've never heard it put that way before, yet it fits him perfectly.

The flashbacks (and flashbacks in general, they appear in all my stories) are some of the best parts to write, they're really fun. I'm glad you found it intruiging and a little disturbing, but could still see where her dad was coming from. When it comes down to it he was trying to prepare her.

Thanks so much for coming back and leaving me this great review! :D


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Review #8, by EnigmaticEyes16 

22nd September 2013:
zI'm intrigued by your Ginny Weasley, how she clearly thinks Tor is a pureblood snob and then helped and comforted her after Goyle tried to force himself on Tor. And then how she casts her jinx on her when she catched her aiding her friends in tormenting the first years. I'm curious to find out if they'll become friends on not or at least what kind of role Ginny will play in the future...

Again, great chapter!

xxEnigmaticEyes16

Author's Response: Hi! I'm glad you're interested in Ginny here, she's a great foil for Tor and a fun presence to write about. I think of Ginny as just being a very kind, noble person who helps out people in need even if she doesn't approve of everything about them, and she'll make more appearances as the story continues.

Thank you so much for the review, and for sticking with this story! :) I apologize for being so behind on review responses, but hope to be caught up soon! :D


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Review #9, by Calypso  

29th June 2013:
Ahahaha that ending made me laugh! (Although I probably should be feeling sorry for Tor. But then maybe not, because she was very mean to that Ravenclaw girl. So I don't know. So this story is confusing like that. But that's a good thing. :P)

I like that you've introduced Ginny a bit into this story. I think I've said before that I enjoy all the points of reference with the books, and as Tor and Ginny are fairly close in age, this seems realistic. You wrote them together really well, and managed to show how if they didn't have such different ideals, they could be friends- and how their alliegances are really the only that divides them. And then there was the contrast between their dislike of each others' backgrounds and their common ground over discussing boys...

Ooh I'm looking forward to Tor and Amaris' prank on Griz! I'm glad that you cleared up why she dislikes Tor so much too...
And Goyle really is awful! That scene was very vivid; I could really feel Tor's panic and you would not believe how relieved I was when Ginny appeared! Another thing you did well was actually showing the repercussions of Tor's encounter with Goyle, and how if affected her, so well done for that too!
One thing I wasn't sure about was whether Tor and her friends wouldn't refer to Crabbe and Goyle by their first names? Seeing as that's how they talk about most of the other Slytherins?

Yet another interesting flashback! I'm very intrigued by Yaxley's reference to the terrible thing he did... It's actually difficult to imagine what a dark wizard would perceive as a terrible thing, unless it's some kind of fraternisation with blood traitors or something...

Aww and I like Terry more and more! I really enjoy the eloquent, slightly sarcastic way of talking you have for him, it fits well with his house, and with what we've seen so far of his personality...

I found that final seen with the first-years very poignant- it actually did a great job of showing the power of peer pressure. I was virtually yelling at the screen for Tor not to do anything cruel, and I genuinely thought that she was going to do us proud and not curse them, but what actually happened was better, as it showed that Tor's pureblood pride is far from altered, and the power that her friends exercise over her actions...

All very interesting! I look forward to reading on! :)

-Bethany

Author's Response: Hello! :)

I'm glad you liked this chapter, and appreciated the ending! Really, Tor got what she deserved, and being confused about the reaction is exactly what I wanted to convey. I'm glad you thought it was better that she attack the first years, and yes, it shows how she's susceptible to peer pressure and still not able to assert any of her own beliefs, especially in front of the other Slytherins. It's that self-preservation quality, I suppose...

I'm glad you liked Ginny: I really wanted to try out writing her the way she is in the books which I always loved, and it does make sense since she and Tor are similar in age. Having canon characters do cameos in this story is always fun as well. :) I agree, they do have a lot in common and could be friends, and I'm glad you liked their little interaction!

The Goyles really do not have many redemptive qualities in this story! The prank comes up a few chapters down the road, but was hopefully worth the wait. :P I'm glad you appreciated the scene with Goyle, which I thought was quite awful as well.

I'm glad you're getting intruiged about Yaxley and his past as well, I really enjoy including his backstory in the flashbacks and sub-plots. Since Tor is close to her father, the way he acts and the things he has experienced definitely affect her as well.

Aw, Terry is so fun to write so I'm pleased you like him! :) I love how you described him as eloquent and slightly sarcastic, that really is a perfect reading.

Thank you for another wonderful review, I really appreciate it! :D


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Review #10, by Broken Butterfly 

24th May 2013:
EW! But well deserved, Good job Ginny. Tor was really not somebody to look up to in this chapter. You showed a good balance between her inner thoughts. she is stuggling to be good, but then she is also still concerned with her appearence to her peers and she struggles to find a place between it. Hopefully this chapter will help her to find a place on the better side of her self.

Author's Response: I'm glad you liked Ginny standing up for everyone! You're right, Tor really wasn't at her best, was she? Then again, she is very conflicted between what good and evil mean to her, and finding a place between them as you said. Thank you for the review! :)

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Review #11, by nott theodore 

20th May 2013:
THREE chapters? Even I'm impressed with myself right now!

So, I absolutely love your portrayal of the Weasleys here. Because we know the Gryffindor characters so well, it's very easy to fall into the trap of thinking that everyone in the school would have known who they were (of course, in the Next-Gen that's probably true, but not in Hogwarts era). Tor's vague recognition of who Ron and Ginny are is so plausible and authentic here. I also like the fact that it's started to give them some realisation of what the coming war might actually mean - it's very different from school rivalry.

Ginny, though - Ginny is fantastic. Seriously, the characterisation of her here is perfect for me. She's such a strong character and I hate reading her portrayed in a similar way to how she's represented in the films, because I really don't think that does her justice. I can easily see her attacking somebody like Goyle when she witnesses him trying to force Tor into something she doesn't want to do, even if she doesn't like her.

Of course, there's the role reversal in this chapter as well, with Ginny attacking Tor instead of defending her, or being verbally attacked by her. I can't say that she doesn't deserve it, because what she was doing was really mean, but I feel like it illustrates Ginny's character really well. It felt like things had kind of come full circle by the end of the chapter.

I also get the impression that Tor is starting to learn and realise a lot more, not only about the world and the war, but about herself. The way she was crying after Goyle kind of attacked her, whilst being totally understandable, demonstrates that maybe she isn't as strong as she thought she was. She is still a girl, after all, but in trying to emulate her father and make him proud, it's almost like she's trying to grow up far before her time. Of course, I think that's something most girls do, but with Tor I think it's in a different way to most others.

The ending of this chapter was a good demonstration of how easy it can be to succumb to peer pressure, and how often that can be the cause of someone doing something that goes against their conscience. Again, it's like Tor is making excuses; the spell doesn't hurt the little girl, so it's not as bad as most things she could have done. But at the same time, she knows that it's wrong for her to have done it, because I don't think she would have hesitated or chosen a harmless spell to use if their had been real malice or intent behind it.

I loved the way that despite the war and the ideas of blood status really taking centre stage in this chapter, it was still interspersed with elements of Tor's teenage character. Her insecurities about Terry liking her and the jealousy of other girls, and the confusion about who she is supposed to like - I really enjoyed it.

Another aspect that grabbed my interest was the dream that Tor had about her father. I can definitely believe that Death Eaters would have taught their children those sorts of spells at a young age, but it's still horrible to think that she was put under the Imperius Curse by her own father. It's like he's training her but also trying to protect her and warn her of possible danger at the same time. I'm so curious about what Yaxley did when he was under the Imperius Curse!

A couple of typos that I picked up on:
"Young Master was told my Miss Amaris" -- by Miss Amaris
"and I did a terribly thing." -- a terrible thing

Your writing style is so lovely to read; it's really natural and compelling. I'm looking forward to the next chance I get to read some more!

Sian :)

Author's Response: I am so impressed and thrilled with your reviewing spree! :)

I'm glad you liked how the Weasleys appeared, and how Tor and her friends don't really know who they are beyond knowing that they don't like them. Tor's version of Hogwarts is generally pretty separate from Harry's, though they do overlap on occasion.

I'm so glad you like Ginny! I loved her in the books and felt like she got overlooked in the movies for the most part, so it was really important to me to write her correctly! :)

You're just right, Tor's eyes are starting to slowly open and she's seeing what she hadn't wanted to in the past. And yes, she's definitely a victim of peer pressure and being pressured to behave in a certain way. While she didn't really want to hurt the girl, she also wanted to save her own skin.

I'm glad you thought the dream and the bit about learning the Imperius curse was interesting as well! He definitely wants her to be the best witch she can be, and also is grooming her to be a sort of tool for the future.

I'm really glad you're liking this chapter, and again thank you so, so much for these reviews and for all the lovely words! You're awesome! :D


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Review #12, by marauder5 

10th March 2013:
I love Ginny in this chapter, I absolutely love her! I think that you've captured the essence of her character perfectly :) Also, I found it so cute that Theo was worried about Tor when he couldn't find her. How will he react if Tor and Terry get together? (If he ever finds out, that is...) Very intriguing, indeed.

Author's Response: I'm glad you liked Ginny and her sassiness, she's kind of an unexpected but good influence for Tor. Thank you so much for reading and giving me these amazing reviews. You're the best! :)

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Review #13, by Your sistah 

25th February 2013:
You are a maestro of the manipulation of words. xox

Author's Response: Er, thanks?? haha you're a silly one. Please keep reading and reviewing, I'd love to know any suggestions and criticisms!!! :)

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