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6 Reviews Found

Review #1, by patronus_charm 

19th April 2013:
Regina represents the person we fear yet admire at the same time. I could see what Rose meant about her commanding tone with the way she stood there, and immediately sussed everything out. Even though I don’t particularly like Regina, she did bring up an important point that Rose doesn’t really know all that much about Krum, then again, he is secretive so it isn’t really her fault.

They found Krum then! I’m guessing he’s hiding out in his house in Bulgaria, but I suppose I’ll find out soonish considering Rose is on a plane somewhere! This line seemed a little odd to me, I think it’s either missing a word or the structure’s a little off –‘It was the first time Rose ever had occasion to ride in an airplane.’ It may just be me, but I thought it was best to point it out :)

I’m glad that Rose had the courage to challenge Krum over why she was drawn to him and the whole mess was created. As Regina kindly pointed out to her, she seemed a bit more lenient towards men then Regina was, so I was proud of her that she was standing up for herself, and that Krum really wasn’t that ‘irresistible’.

You’re right about it being onward and upward, while I do enjoy a good bit of angst it was nice to see a happier and calmer Rose and Krum. I’m starting to get worried now, and that happier scene was just a bluff. First there was no sign of Heart, then her parents and then Krum not answering. What on earth could have happened? Ah Krum’s unconscious! I’m guessing it’s drug or alcohol related, and I do agree it is sweet that he wanted to protect Rose, or he’s just being a stubborn man and refusing to see a doctor.

I think I was as blinded as Rose about how bad Krum really was, I didn’t expect him to begin convulsing and doing that to himself. I suppose with people like him you never really know what they’re going to do, and it’s just good that she went and found him as I dread to think what it may have been like otherwise. It was so sweet when he came around though, and Rose was trying to care for him, and Krum was just like I’m fine trust me!

I spotted this here – ‘You saved me, remember? Everything’s going to be okay.”’ The remember went down to the next line, when it looked as if it could have been on the same one as ‘you saved me’. I just thought I should point it out :)

The mystery thickens with Krum being unable to remember what happened when he collapsed. I didn’t want him to be in that state due to him falling into his old ways, but other than just randomly fainting the only thing I could think of is him being attacked. But who would really want to attack Krum, the only really vindictive person is Regina, but she didn’t seem to hold that much hate towards him.

The hearing does sound a little optimistic with what Peter said about Krum keeping his nose out of trouble, as he has done that for the past two weeks. I hope he does get off, as he does seem to be more troubled than a real criminal. Another excellent chapter!

-Kiana :D

Author's Response: Regina is definitely one of those people who can make you doubt yourself. What she says is true, but somehow distorted, until she sort of backs you into a corner you can't argue your way out of.

I'm really glad you liked the way Rose stood up to Krum. Rose does let him get away with a lot, and he is sort of constantly seeing how far he can push things, but she'll only take so much before pushing back.

lol, I try never to let the characters get too comfortable. Just when they seem to be settling in... I wanted his overdose to be a surprise but still believable. Like you said, when it comes to people with his past problems, you have be prepared for this sort of thing.

haha! Well, I guess you know the ending now, of course. I think you might be the first person to suspect Regina at this point in the story.

Troubled is probably the perfect description for Krum. He isn't really a bad guy; he just makes a lot of bad decisions.

Thanks for pointing out those two errors. I'll make sure to go back and take a second look at them. And thanks for another lovely review!

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Review #2, by CambAngst 

18th March 2013:
Hello, again! It's Monday morning, so here's to a little reading and reviewing over yogurt and cereal...

It was really sweet to see Rose keeping vigil over Viktor. After what he did to himself, he probably didn't deserve such good treatment. The same way that I thought you did a great job writing Viktor's OD in the last chapter, I thought you managed to capture the essence of what it is to watch over an addict going through withdrawal in this one. Again, you didn't over-dramatize things. It's basically a lot of boredom punctuated by brief bouts of incoherent jabbering and scary physical outbursts.

When Viktor finally comes around, his reaction was mostly what I'd expected: somewhat humble, slightly macho and a tinge of regret for having put Rose through it all. It's really interesting to watch his demons and his pride battle with the good person who peeks out every so often. Regardless, it was a big step for him when he told Rose where to find the last of his stash and let her dispose of it. Well, assuming that was his only stash, anyway. Hard-core addicts usually have a Plan B. I'll choose to think the best of him at least for now.

These two lines, I thought, were another classic example of the intense conflicts inherent in Viktor's relationship with Rose:

"Then what is it you want me to say?" Rose asked with more than a hint of agitation coloring her voice.

"I want you to say vhat it is you’re thinking. You deserve that much, at least."

He wants her to be herself, on his terms.

And then they settle into what seems like a really nice little domestic routine. You really backed off of describing the physical aspect of their relationship in this chapter, which made sense to me. Viktor is still recovering, after all, and it seems like the two of them have moved beyond just physical infatuation. At times in this chapter, you could almost see the two of them acting like a married couple.

I loved the descriptions of the two of them walking outside in the fall leaves. I probably don't give you enough credit for the lovely way that you're able to evoke a mood through imagery and details in this story, but you're really quite good at it. This chapter was so wonderfully domestic. I can't help but feel like it's the calm before the storm...

I noticed a few typos that you might want to take a second look at, but nothing too major:

So you hedge your bets, pick the people you think will cause the least amount trouble and let them keep their freedom. - amount of trouble

Rose was enjoying their time away as well, though maybe not quiet as much as Krum. - not quite as much

October had arrived, brining with it a noticeable drop in temperature. - bringing

Krum’s brief escape to Bulgaria had thrown the press of their scent. - off their scent

That's all for this chapter, I'm afraid. Lovely job, as always. I'll be back soon!

Author's Response: Okay, it feels a little weird responding to this knowing you've already read the ending, but hopefully I can still be coherent.

While I wanted the OD to be dramatic, I'm definitely glad it didn't seem OVER dramatic. Hopefully the drama comes more from what it means for their relationship and him as a character than because of his physical symptoms.

I'm so happy you mentioned the part about him telling her where the last of his stash is. I personally saw it as a huge moment for him but no one else commented on it. He could have lied and she'd have been none the wiser, but it was meant as a show of good faith on his end, at least in my eyes. But I didn't feel I could really come out and say it since I don't think Rose, having no experience with an addict, would recognize it as that. Anyway, I'm glad it stood out to you enough to comment on it.

Okay, so I guess you know now that their physical relationship gets addressed again in future chapters, but I'm glad it seemed natural to back of it a bit at this point. I did try to have some measure of balance in their relationship. They don't really have a lot in common, and intellectually this isn't a great match, so I thought it was important that it was passion more than anything that brought them together initially. But at some point, most couples have to either settle into each other's lives or go their separate ways.

I'm off to fix the typos now. Thanks again for pointing them out.

I'm not sure if you plan on reviewing the other chapters since you've already finished the story, though I hope you do since I really enjoy your comments. But if not, thank you so much for reading the story. I'm one of those terribly annoying writers who never believes people when they say they like something I wrote, but I really hope you did enjoy at least some parts of it. And thanks again for all the reviews, particularly being number 150. I really wasn't ever expecting this story to get that many, so it's an extra special milestone for me.

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Review #3, by Dark Whisper 

14th February 2013:
Oh, dear... Krum would have some in the house, wouldn't he? I'm glad he told her the truth about it and even more happy that she got rid of it. But of course, if an addict needs more, they know where to get it. But him telling her the truth about it, really says something about his trust and his willingness to quit.

I believe him about not remembering. I think he is telling the truth, but why doesn't he remember it? Hmm. Interesting.

I'm glad Brooks is still on the case fighting for him. I do hope it works out.

And how cute is it that he is correcting a few things in her book? I like that he is reading it and even though she is busy, she should let him do this so that it is accurate.

Anyway, I'm glad that he is okay. And when she was laying with him, quietly crying for him, I really felt for her... and him, really. It was nice to hear him say 'sorry' too. I'm sure it is something that he isn't accustomed to saying. He probably feels extremely bad to have her see him like that.

;( And he actually might be shocked that she didn't run away and not come back. How many girls in his life witnessed it and ran? Instead, she was still there for him, through it all. So sad.

Excellent heart-gripping chapter,
Dark Whisper

Author's Response: You're the first one to comment on him having the drugs in the house. That moment was actually one of my favorites so I'm so glad it stuck out to you. I kind of thought it was telling too.

Awww, I'm so happy you liked the book part. Rose does want it to be accurate, but she could do without the reading-over-her-shoulder bit.

The scene in the bed was tough. Rose isn't a robot so I knew I had to give her some moment of emotional response to this, but I didn't want it to be over the top. I don't see Rose as very melodramatic. And I think there is a lot behind that apology...

Thank you once again for all these lovely reviews. I don't consider myself all that great at writing emotional scenes, so I'm so pleased that at least some of the feelings I was hoping to portray came through here.

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Review #4, by Ardeith 

16th January 2013:
Yay, two chapters for me to read!! And this was a great one. I loved how you depicted Rose and Krum's relationship here. It was so touching and so real. Rose is a better person than I am, I think...I would have been yelling "why did you do this?" as soon as he woke up.

These were some of my favorite parts:

The whole part where Rose holds Krum when he first wakes up and then she breaks down.

The whole part where they are working together/walking together/spending all this time together and ignoring the bigger issues. This:

"Rose would even go so far as to say she’d enjoyed spending so much time with him, at least once he’d gotten back on his feet. But there was still so much they hadn’t discussed. And now Rose was beginning to wonder if they’d ever get around to addressing all the things that remained unsaid between them."

Author's Response: Yea! I'm so glad you're continuing to enjoy the story. And those were some of my favorite parts to write, so I'm super happy you liked them. I just sort of loved the idea of them walking around, enjoying the weather and each other's company, even with all these big things hanging over their head. And I'm with you. Rose is a lot more patient than I would be. But the anger and the yelling will burst its way through eventually. Thanks, as always, for the R&R!!

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Review #5, by nmb 

9th January 2013:
Very different to anything I've read here. Very good!

Author's Response: Thanks so much. I'm glad you're enjoying the story.

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Review #6, by Jchrissy 

9th January 2013:
You are my favorite person ever. I didn't even have time to start nagging you about wanting a new chapter before this one popped up!! Eek!

Okay! So I finally have my first bit of CC. Although it revolves more around my opinion than anything, so it is very likely you'll just want to toss it out the window.

In the last 16 chapters you've built a very strong women for us to fall in love with. She's not hot headed, she's not a loose cannon, and she can come off as too young and fragile until you get to know her. But she's strong and she pushes back when something isn't okay with her. I feel like this chapter was a bit different, but that makes sense because right now she's just terrified of losing what she realized she wants so much to keep (Krum). So not outwardly dwelling on what happened to him, now forcing him to promise he won't do it again or anything makes a lot of sense with what you've built. But she just seems too.. Over it. I kept waiting for her to excuse herself to the bathroom or to a different room and just break down because she's so mad but doesn't want to risk him knowing that and pushing him (hehe) over the edge. So it's all just buried so deep and then it just breaks. Something like that to show that she is more torn up about what happened than she seems in this chapter. Again, that's clearly a complete opinion one and it only came after really trying to think of what this chapter could be missing that I could try and help on.

But the way Rose is committed to him.. How she doesn't just walk away and force herself never to look back, is such an amazing testimony to her strength as a person and her love for Krum. Then by the end of it, the two of them working in a sort of harmony pausing to break for walks outside in the fall weather.. Gah. You're cutting my heart open and I just want to run and hide because I know there's still a lot more to come. Please, please give me a happy ending? Please??

I love that Hugo wasn't too please with Krum, by the way. It was a small detail that just reminded us that Rose's family is loving her still, and will always be there for her if and when this ends badly.

ALSO. In regards to your last review response. Don't ever talk yourself out of PMing me to talk scenes! You know I'd love to be a bouncing board for ideas!

Your writing really was able to shine through in this chapter. You kept the scene the same, nothin earth shattering happened, we were very much in one room for an entire chapter. It would have been so easy for someone to let that feel slow... But it wasn't at all. It was just as intense as the rest as story and felt just as important, if not more because you're really bringing these two to a very raw point in themselves, as the rest of the story. That's such a huge compliment to your writing because it was how you crafted it that gave it such an important, necessary feeling. I think I'm turning green from jealousy. Almost sure of it.

Ps--- take that Momo! Review number one!! Wooot

Author's Response: Haha, well after such a long hiatus, it was the least I could do. Actually, I don't know how I managed to crank out a second chapter so fast. Best to not ask questions and just go with it, right?

Yeah, CC! I'd never want to throw it out the window. All feedback is helpful. Actually, I'm not surprised that you commented on the emotions. I've always warned you it wasn't my strongest point :P Though, to be honest, I was expecting more of the opposite reaction. I thought someone might say that Rose's breakdown in bed was too over the top. But I do totally see where you're coming from. My justification, if you want to call it that, is that she's scared to let it out. She's really not secure in this relationship and she thinks if she makes this too big of a deal, she'll run him off -- or worse, that it will be somehow her fault. She doesn't want to be like her parents and always be fighting. But I do see how that wouldn't preclude her from breaking down in private. *Spoiler alert* She won't be able to hold it in forever and there will be a confrontation eventually. I'll be anxious to hear if it addresses what you're feeling here. I hope that all doesn't sound like I'm trying to talk you out of feeling that this didn't read exactly right. It's great CC and I thank you greatly for it.

I'm so glad you liked the tidbit about Hugo. Actually, Krum is going to meet the whole family in another few chapters (another spoiler; wow, I'm full of them today!) and well, you know that won't go well.

And thank you for what you said about the writing in this chapter. This one was different for me because it was several little scenes instead of one or two big ones, and that pushes me out of my comfort zone. I'm glad it didn't bring the quality down to terribly much.

Thank you, as always, for being the best reviewer a person could ask for. I might just take you up on that PM offer. Really, you're too wonderful!!

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