7 Reviews Found

Review #1, by patronus_charm 

13th April 2013:
I really liked how you built the tension over what may happen to Krum. You could tell Rose is beginning to care for him with asking whether the book should go ahead or not, and whether Krum will be alright. She contrasts so nicely with Krum as she just seems to have this innocence about her, compared to the darkness Krum alludes.

It was interesting to learn about Krumís downfall from being a quidditch play at his peak. It sort of explains his current behaviour as it mustnít have been easy to have to give what had really been his life. Iím almost beginning to feel sorry for him now, even if getting himself locked up was his own fault. He really does have a lot of mystery attached to him. I really hope we get to find out more about his wives and why their marriage ended in divorce as if thereís an interesting story behind it.

I rather liked the questioning scene. Krumís so complex so it was a lot of fun to his reaction to everything. I almost thought he was going to have this childhood filled with horror like Rose was thinking, so it was a little disappointing finding that wasnít the case. I really like the hinting about them being together with the winking and Krum calling it a date; I canít wait to see what pushes them to be together.

Ooh so Rose doesnít know about what happened between Hermione and Krum then? Thatís interestingÖ I canít wait to see what happens when she finds out, and I wonder who will break it to her, Krum or someone else.

It had to be Albus! I like how you didnít make his life perfect. As Albus said the baby wasnít planned and they had broken up, so it canít be an ideal situation theyíre in. I dread to think what Harry and Ginnyís reaction to this was, as I canít imagine they would be too pleased with this happening. I really want to meet Amelia, as I have feeling sheís going to be quite a character.

Go Rose! I felt proud of her fighting back at Krum, as he does deserve as he hasnít been the nicest person around. Haha, I guess I can see what Krum may have thought when Rose went over to Al, but it didnít make any less funny for me! Ah she finally chose Krum! That ending was brilliant, it was so dramatic and tense, I was sitting here on tenterhooks.

It was all going so well, after that night, then for Krum to have a mysterious person over and claim itís no one. Iím guessing itís either a bailiff, probation person for either his crimes or drugs, or some other person whoís woven into Krumís story. Then not wanting her to come over again that night. Ah not knowing is starting to get very annoying now!

So we get to meet Peterís mum, that was exciting! She seemed so nice and normal, it was hard to think that she would fall for someone like Krum, then again, you wouldnít have thought Rose would fall for him. It was nice to know more about him in an earlier stage of his life, and how he had been nice. Itís cool how all the people in this story are interlinked like how Regina got Rose the job, yet they were both with Krum.

The secrets are starting to come out now, and I canít wait to find out more!

Author's Response: I'm so glad you're liking the contrast between the characters. I do think that there is a lot of natural tension when two very different people are pushed together for any reason. Hopefully it helps add a sense of uncertainty about how things will play out between them.

How to include all the back story was definitely a challenge! I knew endless scenes of Rose questioning Krum about his life would have gotten very tedious very quickly, but I'm really happy you liked most of this scene. I'm sorry his childhood felt like a bit of a letdown. I debated a lot on giving him a more troubled upbringing, but in the end decided against it. I didn't want to "force" the reader to like him because of what he'd been through as a kid or provide too much of an excuse for his later behavior.

Albus will definitely keep popping up throughout the story. I guess I do put him through the ringer a bit! But even though he doesn't really have his life together at the moment, I really like the idea that he can still teach Rose something about what love and family can look like -- even when it's complicated and messy.

Hooray! I'm so happy you liked Rose fighting back a bit. Krum can be moody and manipulative, and Rose can get caught up in it all. But I did want to show that she isn't completely at his mercy. Hopefully it makes the reader more comfortable with the relationship knowing Rose goes into it willingly.

Yikes! Sorry if all the secrets are getting annoying. I tend to unravel my stories pretty slowly. I guess I like keeping my cards close to my chest. I am glad you liked Liddy though. I love having characters cross paths in unexpected ways!

Thank you once again for another lovely review. I've really enjoyed reading all your feedback!

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Review #2, by CambAngst 

15th February 2013:
Wow! My hat is off to you. Very few writers have the skill -- or the courage -- to write stories for HPFF that pack real heat. It's such a tricky balancing act, keeping your writing ToS-compliant while conveying passion and realism. I thought you did a great job of dancing that fine, red line. The first section of this would make a great tutorial on how to write love scenes for HPFF.

I liked the mix of satisfaction and "oh, crap, maybe I shouldn't have" that you mixed into Rose's thoughts. She's obviously put herself in a very dicey position. Professional ethics would doubtless tend to frown upon biographers sleeping with the subjects of their books. At the same time, it seemed like she truly wanted this, in spite of the consequences.

At first I thought Krum's words and actions on the morning after seemed a bit odd. He worked pretty hard to land Rose, after all. He opened up a bit of himself that very few people probably ever get to see. But once I heard Libby's warning to Rose at the end, it cast Krum's actions in a whole new light. He seems like the sort of man whose mood can change at the drop of a hat. He also seems to have the ability to turn his feelings off and on like a light. Doubtless a very helpful defense mechanism when you're famous and surrounded by many people who pretend to care about you. I pity him, in a way. Compared to somebody like Rose, who's rapidly losing herself in her desire for him, he's missing an awful lot of the experience.

And now we have another mysterious stranger who has some interest in Krum. For a guy who hasn't been famous in a really long time, he sure seems to attract quite an entourage of shadowy characters.

I loved the entire conversation between Rose and Libby. You managed to add a lot of depth to Krum's character and introduce a whole slew of new questions at the same time. I'm starting to feel like I need an organizational diagram of some sort to keep track of who has what sort of past history with who. Krum is now tied into Brooks by marriage, Heart by way of his ex-sister-in-law and, oh, by the way, to Rose based on his very brief relationship with Hermione. I feel like you're twisting the different threads of your plot tighter and tighter together and something has to pop sooner or later.

This was my favorite line in the whole chapter: ďViktor is... like a flame. He burns bright and hot Ė drawing you in, filling the darkness. And then suddenly, itís gone...the warmth, the heat. And youíre left in the black, cold and alone.Ē

At the same time, it isn't easy to put the things that Libby said into a black-and-white context. There seems to be little doubt that she's a social climber. For her to be so warm and gracious -- not to mention very happy to spill -- toward Rose when her housekeeper clearly viewed Rose as a lesser entity, it made me question her sincerity just a bit. She was also so blase about their divorce. For the moment, I'm taking her warning with a grain of salt. I doubt that I'm going to find Regina McFey's observations much more credible, for some reason.

I was kind of impressed that Krum would give up his cigarettes for Rose. Then again, the man is a former pro athlete. He's used to sacrificing physical comfort to achieve a goal. You are doing quite an amazing job of keeping me guessing. Rose is the one person where I never feel the need to guess. For better or worse, she's found something that makes her happy. So she's going to enjoy that for as long as it lasts.

So I'm not even sure whether I'm allowed to point out the first typo I noticed in a 12+ review. I think I'm safe enough if I just say that it should have read "in the air" instead of "in there air". PM me if you need clarification. ;)

ďAll rightt,Ē she said, grabbing her purse up off the counter - not sure whether that extra t in rightt was meant for emphasis.

The spins of the books were perfectly aligned - spines

ďI wouldnít say the too are close now, but back then...Ē - two instead of too

This was another chapter that started off kind of slow and then once it got rolling I couldn't look away from the screen. You grab my attention and then pull me along for the ride. It feels like big things are about to happen and I'm really looking forward to it!

Author's Response: Thanks for the hat tip! I've been telling members for years there is a lot of room to play in the site rules. We just don't need an anatomy lesson ;)

I'm glad you liked Rose's mixed reaction. I tried very hard to keep the emotions here grounded. I mean, these aren't teenagers the morning after a party in the common room. Still, these things can be tricky at any age. Not to mention the added issue of the book. I hadn't thought of Krum's reaction as odd in light of how hard he had pursued Rose, but it's a good point. I guess I just saw him as keeping things close to his chest. Plus, it's been a while since he's spent the night with a woman he actually WANTS to see the next morning. Hopefully Krum's less than stellar ability to effectively convey his emotions will be a continuing theme.

I'm glad you liked the chat between Liddy and Rose. I thought it was important to let Rose and the reader see Krum in as many lights as possible, and Liddy was just a lot of fun to write. Krum keeps so much to himself, it was fun to have a character who just sort of lays it all on the table. I don't think she was lying here -- maybe a bit self-delusional about her own innocence, but she means well. And hopefully all the family connections aren't too over the top.

I love what you said about the story keeping you guessing but Rose being relatively constant. That makes me super happy. I want the change in her to be slow and gradual. If her character doesn't feel consistent, that would definitely not be good!

Thanks for the review -- and the typo spotting. I got the non-12+ one just fine ;) Thanks again!

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Review #3, by Dark Whisper 

13th February 2013:

I have to admit, the beginning of this chapter made me blush. His words teasing her... and now "every inch of him joined in the fun." Oh. My. Sweet. Goodness. And then waking to "begin the climb all over again." Jaw dropping prose. I LOVE IT!

And then... "Whatever insecurities he had, sexual prowess wasn't one of them." Perfect line.

You continue this vivid description of him as Rose practically studies his body... dense, tan, the tattoo that continued... *blush* You wrote that so vividly, I was standing in the room, enjoying the view along with her. Mmm hmm. Amazing description, even staying true to his age and being realistic. Fan-freaking-tastic!

And then... when he asked her if she was "all right." *Melts* And as far as her insecurities with him and worrying that it was a one night fling, was again... very realistic. You write what she is feeling so very well. Amazing job at this. Absolutely spot on.

And the 1st Mrs. Krum. I think I like her. She seems genuinely kind and obviously still cares for Viktor in helping him with his housing situation.

She does drop more than a few bombs though... the connections that Heart and Brooks never told her. I would be furious with them. Heart could've at least told her that Regina was wife 2. Urgh! It is a wonderful story that you weave here. More mystery has been injected and the truth is coming out. It makes me distrust the lot of them.

With Krum being a "serial heartbreaker," I would be heart-sick if I was Rose, the poor dear. She doesn't want it to be true, but knows full well that it is. ;(

And in the end, despite the warning, I would've let him in too. Tsk. Tsk. *nods in agreement*

Shamefully hooked,
Dark Whisper

P.S. Yeah, he is quitting smoking. One old vice for an "upgrade." *Squeals*

Author's Response: Yay! A little blushing is good. I thought it was important to address the *ahem* physicality of the situation, since it really does mark the start of their relationship, but I had no interest in pouring over the details. Hopefully this stuck the right chord.

As to Rose's insecurities, I hope that's something most people can relate to. I think we'd all like to think we can play it cool and be adults about this sort of thing, but opening yourself up like that really can leave you feeling vulnerable, especially with someone who can be as difficult to read as Krum.

I like Liddy too. She isn't perfect my any stretch of the imagination, but at least she, unlike Krum, will give Rose a straight answer. And in this case, tells her a bit more than she wanted to know...

The ending was fun to write, and I wish now that I'd slowed it down JUST a tad. I'm so glad you liked the line about the upgrade! Even his sweeter gestures have a little edge to them... at least that's what I was aiming for.

Thank you for another amazing review!

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Review #4, by maskedmuggle 

15th January 2013:
Ooh another chapter full of surprises! I love plot twists and this story has a lot of them :P Starting from the beginning - it was pretty much what I had expected to happen, though I was uncertain what would happen after it. I'm surprised by this: "She didn't believe him but she had no interest in spoiling their perfectly good night together by getting into a row.", surprised that Rose doesn't seem to really show any regrets or concerns, and doesn't want to fight for answers at all? She also seems surprisingly.. needy, with the "Shall I come back later then?" but I guess that could be more for the book than the relationship..

Onto Liddy.. a really surprising character. I wasn't sure why she would be attracted to Krum, but I'm glad you explained that to me with the money and with this absolutely perfect analogy: "Viktor is... like a flame. He burns bright and hot - drawing you in, filling the darkness. And then suddenly, it's gone... the warmth, the heat. And you're left in the black, cold and alone." However, I'm still a little dubious about Krum's intentions - it's strange to think that he would go for someone like Liddy, but then again, it's also strange that he's with Rose.. so again, dying to get in his head!

I found all those new family relationships a really curious revelation.. and I too, like Rose, am full of questions :P Especially about Gigi McFey - Krum has a second wife? Shock. I would have thought how many wives Krum has had (and even who they are) would have been common knowledge?

Anyway, I had a lot of thoughts on this chapter, but I did really, really enjoy reading it! And yet again, you end with something that leaves me wanting to know more - why is Krum at her home? :P

By the way, yay on 100 reviews! :) I'm sure the number will continue to grow. This is such a terrific story. ♥

Author's Response: Gah, thank you a thousand times over for being my very first 100th review!!

My intent with Rose's behavior in the beginning of the chapter was to show her less as needy and more as insecure in this relationship. She doesn't want to run Krum off by nagging him, so she let's things slide. This becomes a pattern for her throughout the rest of the story. But I can totally see how that one line for sure comes off as needy. She/I meant it to refer to coming back to work on the book, the same as they'd been doing all week, but I can see how it comes off the other way, like she can't stand not to be with him.

Liddy is an odd duck, for sure. Krum was someone she loved when they were both very young, and also someone she saw as a ticket to a better life. They were together way before his troubles really took off, so I think she thought life with him would be all glitz and fun. I mentioned in one of the little book snippets about Krum being married twice, and though I imagine Rose saw the name Gigi during her research, the last name would have been different since McFey is the name of Regina's second husband. So that's why she never put two and two together.

Thank you again and again for the R&R and pushing me to 100!!

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Review #5, by momotwins 

8th December 2012:
Hi! I picked up the story here since I'd read 9 and 10 during the beta process and I wanted to see what happened next :) And damn girl! That's some sexy writing there. And you did it in two paragraphs! People should take note: how to write sexy without writing graphic.

You have a really vivid style of description, which I love and greatly envy. I can picture every scene like it's a movie playing in my head. I'm kind of surprised Krum is in such good shape considering he seems to have been nursing a long-term drinking habit, but I suppose the history of a professional athlete is going to factor in there. And maybe I need to read the early stuff so I can see if it's as long-term as I'm thinking. But anyway.

And thank you for treating the subject of sex in a relationship as an adult. Such a relief to read ;) It *does* change things. That so often gets ignored in stories in the queue, you know? Ah grown-up experience *high-five*

I noticed a typo here:

I bet Krum's not being quiet as Ė shall we say helpful

Should be quite rather than quiet. And here:

at least they way Viktor tells it

Should be the rather than they.

And I got so fascinated by Liddy that I forgot to pick up real comments on the story. The scene at her house was totally entrancing, seriously. Also, I want to live in her house. Your line about her only falling in love with men with deep pockets, I kind of giggled. My best friend says she only, ahem, how can I rephrase this, she only feels attraction to men with money. I'll have to tell you in a non-12+ place some of her phrasing on it ;) But anyway, if you've ever seen Gentlemen Prefer Blondes, Marilyn Monroe's character asserts that it is just as easy to fall in love with a rich man as it is with a poor man.

Oooh and the last paragraphs, sexy again. Oof. I feel like I need to fan myself. All right, so I loved it, lots of interesting developments for the characters, and now I'm dying to read the next one.

And as an aside, I'm picturing how psycho Ron is going to be when he finds out his daughter slept with Viktor Krum XD I probably shouldn't laugh, but in my head his expression is priceless. I bet Hermione would roll her eyes at him while looking slightly smug. Heh.

Author's Response: Haha! Now there is something I never considered. Maybe I should put a note on my author's page: click here and see how to write sex scenes that don't make seasoned staffers want to gouge out their eyes with a fork!

Seriously though, thank you for this wonderful review. I can't believe there is anything about my writing that you find enviable, seeing as yours is so top-notch. And you're right. I may have indulged a *little* in terms of Krum's level of fitness, given the circumstances, though I did mention a few times in earlier chapters about him being a little more round in places thanks to years of neglect. And you're right too about the drinking, though at this point in the story, he's been sober for several years. But hey, at least there were no six-packs or soulful orbs anywhere in sight :D

Thanks for pointing out the typos. See what happens when I post chapters without a Beta?

If it doesn't sound too conceited, I'll admit I'm am rather happy with how the Liddy scene turned out. I really enjoy writing characters that aren't bad people, just flawed. And you'll have to PM me your friends phrasing some time. I've known more than a few girls in my day who only ever seem to fall for men with cash.

LOL, yes, I'll admit to the fact that the idea of Ron finding out his only daughter is sleeping with Krum may or may not have been a driving factor in casting Rose in this part. The moment itself takes place if chapter 13 if you ever fancy taking a look.

Thanks again for the review :D

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Review #6, by Ardeith 

19th September 2012:
Wow! I loved this chapter and the rollercoaster of Rose's feelings. It's so real -- it's just like that with a new relationship! Of course she'd have all these doubts, but I love that she let him come into her apartment at the end.

Author's Response: Three reviews in one day! I feel so special. I'm so happy you liked the chapter. Rose is on a bit of an up and down ride at the moment, but she just can't say no to Krum! Thanks for taking the time to review. I so appreciate any and all feedback :)

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Review #7, by Jchrissy 

13th September 2012:
I'v tried to hold off reviewing this until your next chapter is up but I just can't anymore.

I feel like I'm reading an actual story. To be totally honest I barely remeber they are wizards or part of harry potter half the time. Which is supposed to be a huge compliment because I still care about them so much. I care about the characters because you've created them that way, not because they belong to Harry potter. This is a story you could tweak a bit and it would be an OF. Okay, onto my thoughts on this actual chapter.

The way you eased Rose from her own self confidence and brought in the what if's. What if she is just a means to scratch an itch for Krum... The way she goes from knowing that's not the case to wondering if it is was done beautifully.

Agh and I want to hate the first Mrs. Krum so bad because Rose doesn't need to hear about the fire then ice... But I also love her for her perceptive nature and because she just seems like a BA. And I guess maybe it is good that Rose heard it from someone. How would Viktor react? If he knew about the interview would he understand because of the book (for some reason I think not) or will he be irate about the pow wow? Or will it not matter and he'll never even find out?

I loved that in the end Rose still made the decision to let him come in. The section where I can nearly feel her falling asleep with her clothes on and her heart too heavy was probably one of t favorites.

Okay, I am *patiently* waiting to see what happens and will try and resist talking you into pm'ing me just tiny bits of the next chapter. For another few hours, at least ;)

If I was in a book store and I picked this up and started reading it, I would buy it. And stay up all night finishing it. That's pretty much the best compliment I can give, haha.

Author's Response: First, thank you again for reviewing! Without you, my last two chapters would have big old goose eggs next to them! Second, thank you for commenting on how you care about the characters outside of the HP world. I didn't mean for this to sort of veer off into OF quite so much (and it may feel more part of the universe once I finally bring in Ron and Hermione), but the fact that you think the story stands up on its own is about the best thing anyone could say. For the last year or so, I've been toying with the idea of writing something I could send off to try and get published. I don't think my skill level is quite there yet but you're words give me hope I'm headed in the right direction.

To the chapter itself, I almost didn't put that little speed bump of self-doubt in, but in the end I couldn't resist. I think we've all been there to some extent in a new relationship, and knowing his reputation, it felt like it would just *have* to cross her mind. Introducing both ex-wives has been in the plan since chapter two. I'm glad you have mixed feelings about Liddy. That's exactly what I wanted. She's so open, she's hard to hate, and yet she has this thing for rich husbands -- and has an intimacy with Krum Rose hasn't matched yet. I enjoyed adding her dynamic to the story. I can't wait to hear what you think when you meet the second Mrs. Krum!

You are welcome to hit me up for hints anytime. It's the least I can do. I usually have about two chapters planned out in advanced, though I always end up surprising myself with something :)

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