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Reading Reviews for Ignite, Chapter 1: Steam Out
  
25 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Libbypotter 

17th March 2017:
I stopped reading fanfic after I saw Cursed Child. A couple of weeks ago I tried again and found so many 2 dimensional characters and nearly gave up. Then I thought about rereading some of my favourites. Your story was top of my list.

Your characters are so well rounded and believable. I love them all, well probably not Hector

Thanks again

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Review #2, by Shanna18 

24th November 2016:
Hey, since I've been read first chapter I've said in my mind: "Oh, my god, I MUST translate it!"
Well, let me explain: I'am a Italian fanfiction writer, I go to School Languages and I LOVE, ADORE translations. So, if you permitt me, I would like translate it into italian. Don't worry, beacause I'll give you all your dirict, and i'll translate for you your reviews. and, also, I'll insert all your comments.
So, can I?
Shanna

Author's Response: You absolutely have my permission for this! It'd be fabulous if more people could get the chance to enjoy (or heckle) my work! Thanks a whole bunch!

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Review #3, by MercyWaters 

19th January 2016:
This is GREAT. Absolutely love how you've characterized them all. Can't wait to read more!

Bri, xx

Author's Response: Glad you're enjoying it! Plenty to read from here. Cheers!

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Review #4, by The Basilisk 

16th December 2015:
I decided to ssstop by and give a review to sssomething of yoursss. I figured there was little better than to look into what ssso many othersss have enjoyed. Clearly you have made a mark by earning a Dobby and I can sssee why.

I was instantly charmed by your wordsss. You have made very clear and well rounded charactersss that are full of life. I love how you filled Ssscorpiusss with wit. His humor highly amused me. I like his quipsss and how he just juggled thingsss and rolled with the punchesss as it were.

I think though I knew I was going to like thisss ssstory when I read the line about how Hufflepuffsss hunt in packsss. It is ssso true! You have a very good grasssp on the charctersss and houssse traitsss.

With your comedic touch and way of making the charactersss real along with having a good narrative voice, I look forward to reading more of your ssstory when I get the chance to return.

Author's Response: I am lucky indeed to get so much Basilisk attention! You are a little hissier than in past days, so I hope you're well-fed. I don't want to be marauded by a hungry Basilisk.

Scorpius has always been a hoot to write, and really is the cause and source of most of the comedy of the series. So it's just as well people like him, or they'd doubtless find my writing hard to stomach!

Not that I want you to really stomach anything about my writing. Or me. Let's, in fact, forget I used the word 'stomach', and I'll just thank you and we'll move on and I'll invest in some mirrors?


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Review #5, by TreacleTart 

20th September 2015:
Hi there!

I'm making an effort to review all of the Dobby nominated stories and that led me here. Congratulations on your nomination!

To be honest, I'm not really sure how I haven't read your stories before. I've heard nothing but positive reviews of them and just the summary of this story alone was enough to convince me that I'm going to like this.

I was immediately drawn into your story by Scorpius wandering through the train station on his own. I wondered where Draco and Astoria were and why they wouldn't accompany him on his departure for school. It's kind of sad that he feels like it's less complicated if they aren't there. I wonder if that's because somethings wrong with Draco or because Scorpius is the normal embarrassed teenager.

Your characterizations really stood out to me. I adore Scorpius as the snarky, quick as a whip, sort of socially awkward boy. I also enjoyed Albus as calm and collected. I think the way you wrote the friendship between the two of them creates a really nice balance. They seem to sort of feed off each other.

There was one thing that I really loved and it was a minor detail, but something that stood out, was the fact that Ron was nice to Scorpius and even laughed at his jokes. I literally have never seen anyone make Ron amicable towards Scorpius, but I'm so glad that you did. I always liked to think that Ron had a good sense of humor and was a nice guy and I think after all of those years he might be able to move past his own problems with Draco. The part about Hermione's last name made me giggle a bit too. That seems exactly like something she'd do.

Rose was quite the pistol and I'm not sure why she hates Scorpius so much. To me it almost seemed that he's really into her, but since she isn't into him, he's decided to drive her crazy so at least he gets a bit of attention.

As for Rose's boyfriend, he seems like a tool. I know Scorpius was looking to start problems, but there's just something about him that grates on my nerves. Maybe it's his inability to keep up with the witty repartee.

I thought what Harry said to Scorpius was really sweet. Of course, Harry can relate to being alone at the train station and it was really kind of him to let Scorpius know that he was there for him if he needed it. I know Scorpius felt awkward about it, but I think deep down it means more to him than he's letting on.

This first chapter really was very enjoyable and did a great job of introducing each character. I feel like I now have a clear sense of who each of them is and what's going on in their lives. I can't wait to see them develop and to see where this plot goes.

As far as CC goes, I did notice one tiny little typo, but that's it.

And w’’ve had this conversation over and over.’ - we’ve

All in all, a very solid start. I'm truly eager to read more. In fact, I think I'll head to the next chapter right now!

~Kaitlin

Author's Response: I have been terrible at replying to reviews. *cough* I'm glad you've heard good things! And gladder you're here now!

Scorpius is a pretty normal embarrassed teenager in some ways, but his relationship with his parents is, to say the least, rather fraught. But he and Al work well together; this Al could do with someone to make him brighten up, and this Scorpius definitely needs people to calm him down!

I kind of hate the trope of Ron being antagonistic to Scorpius. I can see him never wanting to be nice to Draco (maybe able to be a Polite Adult but never more than that), but I don't see him actually judging Draco's child without reason. And Ron is good enough to his family that Scorpius being Albus' friend is a reason to be NICE. But then, I am very protective of Ron.

I couldn't see Hermione taking her husband's name at the best of times; I absolutely can't see her wanting to be called, "Mrs Weasley." No way!

Scorpius' actions are a little bit 'pulling pigtails' for attention, yeah. Also a lot retribution for Rose being mean to him - but also over the years it's become a bit of a chicken-or-egg rivalry, with poor Albus in the middle.

Hector's mostly just on the mean/selfish end of teenage boy. Which is pretty bad sometimes tbh.

I hadn't intended on the Harry/Scorpius connection when I planned the story, but it became very obvious once I realised! So while Harry hasn't known how to approach Scorp, despite being Albus' friend, he still wants to reach out for him on his own terms.

Curses! Typos even after all this time and editing!

Thanks for reviewing! Glad you enjoyed the chapter.


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Review #6, by HeyMrsPotter 

13th September 2015:
Hello! I'm here on a quest to read the Dobby noms! Congratulations on your nomination :D

‘Hey, Mister Potter, Mrs Potter. Little Potter.’ when I first read this I had to do a double take because of my username :p

I think this is a great opening chapter. You've given just enough away so that I know where we are in the next-gen lives, what houses they've been placed in and such. I'm liking the personalities that you've given them so far, though I'm not keen on Flynn at all, Rose needs to dump him asap :p Harry was also perfectly in character by asking Scorpius if he could help at all, that was a nice moment between them.

On to the next!

Dee

Author's Response: Well, your username makes me want to sing, so making you double-take is the least I can do. ;)

I'm pretty proud of this chapter as an intro, so I'm glad you enjoy it, glad it works for introducing everything. Flynn's a pretty flawed guy, and Rose could do a lot better (unfortunately she has Scorpius). I hadn't intended originally on making a thing with Harry and Scorpius, but the similarities between them became impossible to ignore!

Thanks for reviewing!


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Review #7, by Penelope Inkwell 

11th September 2015:
Hello hello! I know I really enjoyed this story, but apparently I failed, when first reading through, to leave a review on this first chapter. But that's about to be remedied!

Ugh, Rose, break up with this guy. He's not even worthy of an adjective. Just an...ugh.

I liked Scorpius' characterization right from the start. You can tell that he uses humor as a shield, yeah, but it's also a central component of his overall personality. He's incorrigible, but you can't help but like him (unless, maybe, you're Rose. Or a scorned Hufflepuff). I enjoyed his awkward interactions with the Potter-Weasley parents, as everyone tried to figure out what to make of him and how to be polite.

Oh, Methuselah. Reading about him all the way back at the beginning gives me many emotions!


CC:

And w’’ve had this conversation over and over.’
--"w''ve" is short an e and has an extra apostrophe.



Your characterization is as excellent as I remember. Really good work, and congratulations on your Dobby nomination!

--Penny

Author's Response: Yay more reviews.

Aww, poor Hector - nah, he's not great. He is, however, a teenage boy and thus not beyond redemption. Rose is using him for his pretty face anyway.

Scorpius emerged in my head fully-formed and demanded I write a story about him. So I can't lie, right from the beginning, it was easy to get his personality down. I haven't had as... determined a manifestation of a character in a while.

Gah, typos, even after all this time. And thank you for the congratulations! Cheers for reviewing.


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Review #8, by AvadaKedavra1 

8th February 2015:
At last, finally, a next-gen story that doesn't blow chunks. Very well written chapter, I don't know what to think yet.

Author's Response: Ha, thank you. Glad you enjoyed the chapter, hope you try more and that you continue to enjoy it! I assure you, there's, like, plot and everything, not just high school romance shenanigans. Cheers!

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Review #9, by EmmaGM 

1st February 2015:
That was a very good first chapter. I loved how you wrote the characters of Scorpius, Albus and Rose. You did a great job introducing your main characters and making the reader love them immediately. Very good writing!

Author's Response: Thanks, I'm quite proud of this as a first chapter. Glad you're enjoying the next gen guys here! Cheers!

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Review #10, by libbyptter 

23rd January 2015:
yours are the only fanfics i re_read. your Al, Rose and Scorpius are simply the perfect characterisations

Author's Response: :D Thank you so much. I headcanon that Scorpius would probably be less of a clown, that Albus probably wouldn't be the huge, good-natured type... er, Rose is much as I headcanon she'd be... but I couldn't write any other versions of these guys. It would feel wrong.

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Review #11, by roisin 

23rd October 2014:
GAH I LOVE THIS! I really REALLY love this!

All of your characterizations are just excellent. You manage not to take anything for granted, which I really appreciate. I think the epilogue left most of us with some sort of base headcanons for what nextgen relationships would be like, and I really enjoy how you flesh it out here, without just kind of summarizing it. And then, at the same time, you have some really fresh interpretations (Albus), that still very much make sense.

I really loved the voice here, and there's a real easy wit to your writing. So many excellent turns of phrase! Scorpius' humor is just tremendous throughout, and you write everyone's interactions really well. And also, it has the more poignant element of being a kind of defense mechanism.

Also, I commend you a lot for gently weaving in a lot of information. Scorpius' family situation, that Hector character (I'm getting bad news vibes off that one - mostly because Albus doesn't seem to care for him, and Albus seems a very solid and level headed individual).

I wish I had more useful or specific things to say, but I enjoyed this so much that I just kind of read all at once without stopping to take notes!

EE! On to the next!

Author's Response: I'm very proud of this first chapter; it's one of those which fell into my head and the writing came quite naturally. So I can't take too much credit, in some ways; I -wish- it was the product of hard work and delicate crafting, but it was one of those times the stars aligned.

I agree that a lot of people have had headcanons after the epilogue, and a lot of those headcanons have matched up in broad terms. I've tried to not deviate from those, because I'm not massively trying to subvert expectations. This story is a pretty Campbellian Monomyth in many ways, so working with audience expectations is necessary. And then I try to shake up individuals like Albus, because he makes a useful heroic foil for the more trickster-hero Scorpius.

I should have considered the weapon here: if I don't want the audience to like someone, I should make Albus dislike them. That's a powerful tool I shall have to bear in mind.

I will never object to people being too swept away by the reading to not make tiny notes. Thanks a bunch!


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Review #12, by mymischiefmanaged 

12th September 2014:
Hello!

I've read this before but I didn't review as I read, and it's one of the best stories I've come across on this site so I thought I should fix the fact I didn't tell you how much I enjoyed it at the time.

This is a really great first chapter. I like how you take the time to introduce all your characters in their normal world before introducing the main plot. It says something really good about your writing style that you prioritise your characters and their development rather than the big dramatic plot points.

I really love Scorpius. I get the impression he might be your favourite to write? He seems more fully developed than your other main characters (although all of them are wonderful). The moment here with Tim is heartbreaking now that I know what's coming.

It's actually really interesting to come back to this chapter now that I've read the rest of the novel. I'm hugely impressed by how consistent all of your characters are, and to get the reminder of how well they all develop over the course of the novel (most notably Jones).

Thank you for writing this. It's a really great read, and I'm sure I'll be back to review your other chapters :)

Emma xx

Author's Response: Hi! Always happy for folks to come back and review; glad you've been enjoying the story anyway!

I admit I'm quite proud of this chapter, and very lucky because a lot of it just sprung into my head quite fully-formed and became the platform from which the rest of the story just rolled. While Ignite has a hefty plot, I'm all about the characters - the plot serves to advance THEIR story, in my preferred storytelling techniques.

Scorpius is, yes, my favourite. He was also the first character to be 'built' for the story, the one who rocked up fully-formed in my head and demanded the tale be told. The others, I knew where they started, and I'm happy with their developments but Scorpius' tale and conflict were in place right from the beginning. Admittedly, I knew how Methuselah's tale would end the moment the story began.

Poor Tim. I can be quite cruel, and I get surprised myself by how carefree this chapter is when I look back on it, knowing what's to come. Regardless, again, very glad you've enjoyed the story, and thanks a bunch for the review!


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Review #13, by Siriuslover177 

19th June 2014:
This was a really nice first chapter.
I felt bad for Scorp when he was with the Potters and Weaslys. He was so awkward with them. And then when Harry talked to him about his dad, he was awkward again.
although I feel bad for Scorp, I mean, his parents didnt come to see him off, and his dad doesnt like him playing the guitar.

I do not likr Rose's boyfriens, he seems like a bad person, and is probably going to throw some huge fit about Scorp and Al.
And I cannot believe Scorp wrote the wrong name!! He is dumb, he deserved to be yelled at, but I feel bad that it was in front of all the parents.

The Rose and Scorp fighting is funny. I cannot believe she threw a chocolate frog at him! That was great.

I felt bad for Scorp having to be with that Jones fellow. He seems really weird, and not fun to be around. I am glad Al is here to save him now.

Altogether, I really like your writting style, and I am excited to read the rest.


~Sarah
10/10

Author's Response: Scorpius has a hard time with the Potters and Weasleys! He wants to make a good impression, but isn't sure how to. He's got a hard lot in life, with Harry to make things awkward and his absent parents.

Hector's definitely trouble, though we'll see more from him. Jones, however - there's a little more to him than meets the eye. We'll see.

Thanks for reviewing!


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Review #14, by kayleefrank 

25th May 2014:
Just wanted to tell you I absolutely love this story. This is the second time I've read it. Going to start starfall after I'm done refreshing myself with this one. Great job! This also was the first fanfiction I ever read and is a huge part of why I can't stop reading them. Its all your fault lol.

Author's Response: Can't argue with someone doing a re-read. :D It'd probably help coming to Starfall if you're refreshed on the incidents of Ignite!

I have no remorse if I helped drag you into fanfiction. I hope you continue to enjoy it. ;)


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Review #15, by CambAngst 

8th May 2014:
Tagging you from the Review the Person Above You thread in the common room.

So I confess: I saw your username and I thought that you were probably a new member. Imagine my surprise when I discovered how long you've been around and how much you've written! I feel fortunate that you tagged me because I read the first chapter of your completed novel and I really enjoyed it.

I really like the version of Scorpius you've created. He seems to do whatever he's able to do in the world in order to vex his father. It's interesting to me that it seems like he inherited a bit of his father's patronizing sense of humor, only without the arrogance and cruelty. I guess arrogance and cruelty were things that Draco learned, however, so there's definitely a family resemblance here that goes beyond their physical looks.

There's an old southern saying, something about not letting your alligator mouth get your hummingbird behind in trouble. Scorpius definitely has that alligator mouth, and he chooses to exercise it in mockery of somebody much bigger than him. Oh, look, the muscle-bound guy is also Rose's boyfriend. Swimming! Good thing Albus is there to keep Scorpius from getting pummeled. Already, I like some of the things you're setting up. Rose's boyfriend is, at some level, a bully, but she obviously doesn't see that in him. I can almost see the tiny threads of "I hate you so much that I'll like you when everything goes horribly wrong" forming between Rose and Scorpius.

So I get the feeling that the reasons Harry acts awkwardly around Scorpius are not the reasons that Scorpius thinks. It doesn't seem like it's so much the fact that Harry is put off by Scorpius's family, but rather the fact that Harry sees some parallels to his own childhood. That's Harry for you. Still trying to save the world, even if he has to do it one person at a time.

Rose is quite convinced that she knows it all, isn't she? I can see so much of her mother in that one, although I think Hermione wasn't quite so pushy by her sixth year. I can also see some of her father's "I can't admit that I might be wrong" streak. She's a pretty well-rounded character, I think. Plenty of nuance and I'm sure that will only get better. When she throws the chocolate frog, that was pure Hermione, though.

Lastly, there's Albus. This is definitely the first story I've ever read where he wasn't written to be scrawny. It's going to be a challenge to get my head around Albus, the Gentle Giant. I love the way you wrote his interactions with other characters, the effect that he has on them.

For a pretty long chapter, this flowed really well. It had a nice pace to it and I moved through it with ease. I also liked the way that you didn't waste any time dumping extraneous back story on us in this chapter. Instead, you took the reader right into the plot of the story and only delivered the details as they were needed. I remember things much better that way.

Great job! Cheers!

Author's Response: Ha, not a new writer, just one who didn't get involved in the forums until recently.

This story started with a couple of compulsions - one to write an epic adventure, but the other was to write this Scorpius. He's the guy who burst into my head and demand I write about him now, right now, and as you can imagine he was not inclined to take 'no' for an answer. While different to his father, and trying to be different, I have tried to keep him with those certain Malfoy traits. He isn't devoid of arrogance, but it's an arrogance of a different sort; nor is he devoid of cruelty, but it's usually pettiness towards people who have 'wronged' him (rightly or otherwise).

That is an awesome saying. And very true of this Scorpius. He certainly couldn't have counted on Albus saving him from Hector, but he would refuse to let himself be intimidated into silence, even if it made things worse. And, belligerent tension with Scorpius and Rose? Say it ain't so! No, it's not a surprise, is it? :D

I hadn't intended to have Harry see himself in Scorpius, but then I wrote the scene and saw the parallels, and realised Harry HAD to see them, too. And his instincts to save a kid, save the world, AND to do his son's friend a good turn - those would run rampant.

Rose has, in some ways, inherited the WORST of her parents. The good traits are there, too, but she's right now an arrogant know-it-all who never went through the harrowing experiences her parents did which made them question themselves. Her father's pride and the self-importance her mother had at a young age have made a dangerous cocktail. While I'm glad you see her as well-rounded in this chapter (I mean, I'd like to think she is, and she has one of the most robust maturing arcs of all the characters), I am surprised. Most readers found her thoroughly unlikable, to the extent I had to specifically write a Rose-centric chapter to give some introspection and sympathy for her.

I don't fully know why I wrote this Albus as the Gentle Giant. Mostly, I suspect, as foil to Scorpius, which is his primary purpose for a lot of the time. Poor kid takes a while to find his own stride.

I'm quite happy with this chapter as an introduction of most of the major cast, and the minor-but-important-but-not-often-seen cast (ie, the parents - they influence the characters tremendously but won't be in the story). I'm not sure I could replicate this feat of introducing all I wanted it to introduce in one smooth swoop, though there would be more details to come in future chapters.

Anyway! Glad you enjoyed it, and thanks for reviewing!


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Review #16, by Ravenclaw333 

28th April 2014:
I am honestly so glad I jumped on your status in the forums - finding this story has got to be one of the best things I've done on HPFF recently. I love your characterisations and the relationships you've established between characters - and your Scorpius is nothing short of inspired. And 37 chapters plus a sequel? The gods have truly smiled upon me!

Author's Response: I'm glad you're enjoying the story! It's been in the works for coming up on two years now, so plenty of writing here, and plenty more to come.

I'm rather fond of my Scorpius, too. He's pretty much the reason this story even got written. He sprouted in my head, fully-formed, and demanded to be the centre of attention.

Cheers!


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Review #17, by MeByAMile 

28th January 2014:
This is my second time reading the beginning of this story, but I haven't actually finished reading all of Ignite yet, but I loved this story so much I thought I'd come back and review.

Easily my favorite next generation story. Scorpius is wonderful, I've never seen an incarnation of him quite so entertaining, he accomplishes being a jerk but most of the time doing it in a way that makes you want ruffle his hair like he's a little puppy dog, yet other time throughout the story I honestly wanted to smack him upside the head.

I love the comparison of Scorpius and Harry, how they both think of Hogwarts as their true home,(Harry's probably moved from that thinking by now, though I think he will always asociate the place with his childhood), It's also interesting to see how the hand life dealt them affected them differently.

Al and Scorps friendship is great, their energies play off each other well. Al being the long suffering best friend. You can tell the to are really close, finding brothers of the unrelated sort runs in the family I guess. A part of me really badly wants to see them as little kids, but I think I'd die of cuteness overload.

Why do I feel the need to watch Albus go to Prague possibly with his family, and be culturally enlightened?

Interesting Scorp seems to think Rose would blame Hector for any altercation they might of had, that or he's just trying to verbally insult Hector as much as he can.

Just how many times has Scorp been put in a headlock by Al?

'Only to realise he’d made a pass at her in front of her parents. His smile faltered.' One of my favorite lines.

Hugo made Quidditch captain at fourteen?! I just realised that. Wow.

Rose would dislike Quidditch wouldn't she? I can just imagine Ron trying to get her to appreciate the sport with her little brothers and cousins. I can also imagine him going into complete over-protective dad mode as Rose is starting to date.

Scorp writing Miranda's name on the chocolates seems strange since she cheated on him, is it supposed to be a Freudian slip of some sort?

I'm trying to figure out just who Scorpius and Rose were to each other before everything went mental.

Scorpius annoying and making passes at her seems to be the norm between the two. Scorpius seems to have a bit of a a crush.

Rose however hates him, or at least says she does for mostly petty reasons. She doesn't seem to give him too much thought other than the guy that helped tear her and her cousin and best friend away from her.

Something that greatly upsets me about the Scorpius-Albus-Rose friendship triangle is that had things gone differently they'd be the best of friends by now, and as fandom speculates the next trio.

Oh little Tim Warrick, why does your story have to be such a sad one?

'He’d been off to a bad start when his parents had named him “Methuselah”, which wasn’t a name you gave a child unless you wanted them to sprout fully formed and aged eighty from their mother’s womb.' Loved this line so much.

I liked Methuselah from the get go, but I initially had a very different impression of him both appearance and personality wise. At first I thought he was trying to be a superior git, but then I realized for the most part that's just how hes wired. I also imagined him to look like Abed from Community.

'Not to mention that the course is entirely unnecessary with sightings of Dark Wizards or Dark Beings at a record low.' Oh, irony.

I have no idea why but I this desire to meet Diarmuid at some point. Any words on him?

'It was shaping up to be an all right sort of year.' She says now.

Overall great introduction to the story!

Author's Response: I had a nice reply for this all written then my computer crashed... anyway, thank you for going back to review, it's thoroughly appreciated. I always like coming to a big review!

I'm fond of my own Scorpius - of course. There are basically two reasons why this story got written: the first was that I wanted to write a big, epic adventure for the Next Gen, something cinematic and sweeping. The second was that Scorpius walked into my head, fully-formed, and demanded my attention. The similarities with Harry were not planned but once they started interacting they were impossible to overlook. Albus came soon after as an inevitable counterpoint; a Scorpius like this would have to have a fairly laid-back and supportive best friend. Alas, I'm rubbish at writing little kids, so no flashbacks any time soon. Al probably put him in a headlock back then, too.

Hugo did make Quidditch Captain at fourteen - bear in mind, Wood was a fifth year in Book 1. He's good at the game and the vacancy opened up with James leaving school, plus there's merit in having a Quidditch Captain who's going to have several years in the role. Also it kind of depends on his competition, a little bit. But yeah, kid's good at what he does.

Secret: Rose doesn't dislike Quidditch as much as she pretends she does. She just likes being uppity and awkward at this stage in her life.

Scorpius would have just been absent-minded while writing the card for the chocolates - distracted and writing out of habit, or sulking about Miranda, results in not paying attention and her name coming onto the card without him noticing.

Scorpius and Rose basically fought like cats and dogs for five years. Rose STARTED it, yes, because of viewing him as having 'stolen' Albus from her, but Scorpius gave as good as he got, and so it was impossible for Rose to grow out of the habit - Scorpius just reinforced every bad impression she'd had of him, and Scorpius found winding her up too amusing and satisfying to give up on. He does seem to have had a little bit of a crush on her, albeit unknown to him; he found it satisfying to get a reaction. That said, Rose was rather fixated on HIM - while Scorpius would wind her up, Rose was the one who would notice what Scorpius was doing even when it had nothing to do with her! So that kind of hateful obsession went both ways. They do have a chance, of course, to set things right.

Poor Tim. I'm pretty mean.

Ah, Methuselah. You can tell the character developed in the writing, as he comes across a wee bit different here to how he does in later chapters, but in many ways that can be treated as a depiction of how he was perceived. Everyone did think he was pompous and self-important when, in truth, he just failed at dealing with people on a very fundamental level.

Diarmuid? Nobody asks about Diarmuid! I think he's possibly a long-suffering Ravenclaw (did I specify him as a Ravenclaw?) who means well but isn't quite bright enough or assertive enough to cope with an irritable Rose on any given day, and doesn't deserve the hand he's been dealt. Think a slightly nicer and more dim Percy.

Thank you for the big review!


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Review #18, by 800 words of heaven 

3rd November 2013:
OMG! This is such a fantastic start to your story! Consider me very hooked!

You have some mad skills with introducing and establishing your characters. Already, I feel like I know a lot about Scorpius and Rose and Albus! Your supporting cast of the Potter-Weasley clan was also fantastic to read. I am looking forward to seeing more of ALL your characters.

On that note, I love everyone's characterisations. They're so different and fresh to what one usually finds in Next Gen stories. I am so excited to see where you take these characters in the following chapters!

I have trouble with description, so I'm always on the lookout for it - and I found no complaints here! Whilst reading this, I was like, I should be taking notes on how to structure my sentences. These are fantastic!

Obviously, I loved the beginning of your story! Be back soon for more!

Author's Response: This first chapter did take a while to write; I wanted to balance exposition and character introduction without just dumping information at a reader's feet. I'm most of all glad the characterisations feel different whilst still being believable; I didn't want to depart from the logical assumptions people made, but I wanted to do something new.

Thank you very much for your kind words, the review, and I hope you continue to enjoy the story!


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Review #19, by soufflegirl99 

21st October 2012:
This story is fantastic - I love it!!
It's definitely original, and the third person POV works brilliantly with this story.
The character of Scorpius is very well developed - the depth, flaws, thoughts and emotions are explored and make him very realistic and relatable.
I love the way you describe all the different relationships and characters he has - the best friend, the annoyed lover, the fierce enemy, it has all the components of a fambubblybumshus story.
Overall, a pure delight to read, and I'd like to see a lot more of it!! :)

Author's Response: Thank you! I've tried quite hard to make this Scorpius both recognisable as what fandom has envisioned him to be, and different enough to be something new. I feel this chapter sometimes gets a bit frantic with all the characters and ideas it introduces in one go, so I'm glad that's proven to work, to be coherent, and to be compelling. Plenty more of it's still up here, and there's plenty more to come.

Thank you for reviewing!


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Review #20, by cathilde 

21st August 2012:
Scorpius Malfoy is one of my favourite characters ever. He deserves the adoration of mankind.

Author's Response: Scorpius would definitely agree on that. Thanks for reviewing!

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Review #21, by bomberchica 

16th August 2012:
Great start to this story!!! It's new, and different to me. I've read a lot of ScoRose stories, and Scorpius seems to definitely be in character more so than other ones. I like the interaction between Harry and Scorpius too. It seems like they're going to adopt him into their family, whether he likes it or not. :D

Author's Response: I'd say it's hard to judge Scorpius to be 'in character' when he's literally never said a word in canon, but there IS a certain assumption of his characterisation which I have not endeavoured to go against the grain of. Though I think my Scorpius is SILLIER than most. But I'm glad you like him!

Yes, Harry is projecting ALL OVER Scorpius. Scorpius just doesn't realise why yet and is thus just a little freaked out.

Cheers!


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Review #22, by SONofBEEDLE 

8th August 2012:
Funny start. I really liked your versions of the characters. A well-built Albus is something you don't see everyday. Good thing. Your sarcastic Scorpius is also awesome. I just love smartasses xD

I hope the action develops soon. 9/10

Author's Response: Thanks! Yeah, Albus as a big guy isn't something I've seen elsewhere, but it suits this particular Al's personality to have a big presence despite his fairly soft-spoken niceness. And he goes well, I like to think, with our snarky Scorpius, who's a whale of fun to write. Action shall be coming along soon, don't worry! Thanks for reviewing!

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Review #23, by justcause 

27th June 2012:
Ahhh! I like it! Please keep going, your summary made me super interested to see how this is going to pan out!

Author's Response: There will be more! I have several more chapters done and progress is good. I'm glad you've enjoyed what you've read so far. Thanks for reviewing!

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Review #24, by Cap 

27th June 2012:
Terrific first chapter! Really loved all the interactions at the platform! I like the way you write. I hope you keep going with this story - I will look for it. Soon enough other people will read and review too.

Author's Response: Thanks, it's an important chapter for introducing the characters and their relationships and the interaction. I'm very glad that it worked and I'm glad you enjoyed it. There will be more of this, I assure you.

Thanks for reviewing!


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Review #25, by water_lily43175 

25th June 2012:
ACK. Just read, and am going to the pub in like two minutes if my lift is on time! But I want the first review, haha. I'll provide a more detailed review later, but I LOVED this, fantastic first chapter to introduce us to everyone. Love Scorpius and his daddy issues - I notice that he likes the legs, he'd get on well with my Jimmy - love Harry and his niceness, Hermione and her modern subversion of traditional family roles, and of course love the UST. Witch!Lily confuses me though, haha. Noticed the name Doyle ... coincidence? But overall, BIG LOVE and I'd like more NOW please!

Author's Response: Accursed pub! Glad this chapter worked well for the introductions as Almost All of the key faces are at least shown or referred to in this and I was kind of worried it was a bit much to take in. The horde of Potter-Weasleys, so many! So many! And they're all nothing more than secondary characters at best! But four out of five or six of our main cast are in place now.

Harry having a soft spot for a boy with little family support befriending his son struck me as logical, even if Harry has NO real idea how to go about being supportive of Draco Malfoy's son. But he's trying, bless him. And the Hermione stuff only came up because... it was weird calling her 'Mrs Weasley'. Like, SUPER weird. But we have discussed this! Doyle is no coincidence. You'll see. ;)

Glad you liked! It might be a little while now before there's more, but I wanted this out there 'cos I'm kind of nuts. But there will, indeed, be more. Cheers for reviewing!


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