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19 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Just some guy. 

29th June 2014:
Snape down like that? Seriously? I thought he wasn't supposed to be stupid like all the trillion Jily stories out there :(

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Review #2, by marauder5 

20th April 2013:
I liked this round of the Runs better than the first one. I thoroughly enjoyed reading it, from the first word to the last. I don't think I've mentioned this before, but the idea of having the rounds take place in memories... wow. Hats off to you. It's absolutely brilliant. It was nice to see you tying the story together with historical events, like the Goblin Rebellion.

As ever, your writing is brilliant. You've added the perfect amount of detail to this chapter - it makes everything so vivid, but also leaves a little bit for the imagination (just how I like it!!)

As for the events of the chapter, you've surprised me. I had this theory that Snape would be the one to die, but he's out already! And Peter... I'm glad he didn't get the chance to cause any more pain.

I'm really worried about who'll end up in the final round. Don't let it be James! It would break my heart if it was him - he's the one who's been waiting for all this time to meet Harry when he gets there... I'll have to keep reading :)

Author's Response: Out of all five races, the second and fourth ones are my personal favorites, so I'm quite pleased that you liked this one.

Having the setting of duels take place inside of memories gave me limitless options, so I had to carefully pick and choose different types of races to depict. This one was more action-y in the sense that the game changes often. You have to pay close attention to see who's winning and who's losing because it changes so fast.

Thank you for reading and reviewing!


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Review #3, by x3CherryWatermelonx3 

26th January 2013:
Oh goodness! I was not expecting that to happen in Snape's case! When I finished reading that portion, my jaw fell in shock. Quite the trickster you are!

I'm assuming though, that this was Peter's plan in the long run, being eliminated before the final round showed up. Then again, I don't know why it wouldn't be when he didn't want to enter in the first place and certainly has no reason to go back to earth for twenty-four hours.

Quite intriguing, as usual, along with being a wonderful chapter! Can't wait to get to the next one! :)

Author's Response: That's the best reaction I could possibly ask for. XD

Yep, this was definitely Peter's plan. He has no intention of making it any farther than this, because then the risk of him ending up in Round Five and possibly dying is super high. He has nothing left on earth, anyway. He was bound to weasel his way out somehow.


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Review #4, by justonemorefic 

2nd January 2013:
I NEVER KNOW HOW TO REVIEW ACTION CHAPTERS but already everyone is soopa action hero. and the setting is so terrifyingly grim and war-like and I felt rather chilled knowing the goblin could never crawl out of the valley alive. The one with the memory is /dying/ /in/ /there/. puddles of MAROON. jeepers creepers sarah D:

COLIN OMG YOU ARE SO ADORABLE. ok I am placing my bets on a peter-colin finals. Tonks and Snape will be second to last.

ohohoho Snape you think you are so tricky. BUT I HOPE YOU AND JAMES GET TO TALK BECAUSE EVEN IF I THINK YOU'LL BE ETERNALLY DEPRESSED, I LIKE TO HAVE HOPE??

LOL EVERYONE ACCIO'ING Y'ALL ARE AMATEURS. Gotta be like Sev and stuff his own flag into Colin's shoe. I am totally getting Triwizard feels from Cedric and the hydra.

ohhh THAT'S LOW TONKS. YOU DID NOT MORPH INTO A WEASLEY.

SNORT: And heíd splinched himself, leaving behind the hand that was holding onto Jamesís flag. YOU ARE SUCH UNEXPECTED COMEDY, CRABBE.

NOT SNAPE ANYMORE OMG THAT WAS. THE BEST WAY. TO END THIS. OMG OMG OMG. LOL ALSO NOT PETER, I'M TERRIBLE AT GUESSING. ok so colin's going to die to find out what's on the other side now, because there's no one else on the other team that should die die. So I think it'll be Tonks-Colin, with Tonks winning.

LALALA HERE'S ANOTHER THING TO RESPOND TO~ I EXPECT POETRY IN SOME FANCY FORM AND IT BETTER HAVE THE RIGHT AMOUNT OF SYLLABLES. AND NO RHYMING ABOUT LIKE IT'S A-BOOT.

Author's Response: lolol forever at all the capslock in your review, which I attribute to it being a duel chapter. God I am so glad I don't have to write duels anymore.

Somewhere out there, while all the contenders are zipping around trying to off each other, this goblin is just dying a slow and painful death and CREY. You almost wonder what would happen if one of them were to stumble upon him and fix him. NEW TIMELINE.

Peter-Colin finals, eh? And Tonks and Snape as second to last. Oh my, I do enjoy seeing predictions. I just sit here behind my computer cackling. I feel like Bellatrix.

EVERYONE ACCIO'ING EVEN THOUGH IT CLEARLY DOESN'T WORK. ♥ Cedric and his hydra. I had to give him that moment. Poor Ced, making it through the Triwizard Tournament with very little help and when he finally wins he just gets shot in the face with the Killing Curse. IT REALLY SUCKS TO BE A MINOR CHARACTER IN THIS SERIES.

Everything goes wrong for Crabbe.

Hehehehe, Peter is out and there goes your prediction. And Snape - THAT IS WHAT HE GETS. Oh boo I forgot about the poetry. NEXT ONE WILL BE A POEM.


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Review #5, by maskedmuggle 

20th October 2012:
First off, a big congratulations on the TWO dobby awards that you won! This story is most deserving of it - I'm enthralled chapter after chapter and the action in this was definitely top quality.

YOU ARE SO CREATIVE! I loved the memory, the setting and the rules of this round! I think the thing I actually loved most was all the different individual approaches to winning and all their different motives. I thought Tonks hiding her flag in a tree and Fred transfiguring it to a ring was really clever! I also loved how both the people who were actually eliminated were eliminated kind of accidentally.

Your plot is actually quite complex and it all interweaves so well together! I loved Tonks using her metamorphmagus abilities, how Fred thought it was GeorgeÖ aww. And the James/Severus battle was intense! Poor Vincent disapparating and leaving his hand with James' cloth on it! Hehe. There was only thing I didn't understand - why Peter didn't put up a fight against Tonks? and i'm not quite sure why he was laughing manically at the end as well - is it because he knew Cedric had not eliminated Tonks but himself instead?

Apart from that, everything was completely perfect. ♥

Author's Response: Thank you!! I'm still over the moon about the Dobbys. :) :)

My favorite part of writing this chapter was the individual strategies - they were all different types of crafty. I wanted to keep readers guessing about who would win and lose up to the very end.

Good question about Peter! He didn't put up a fight because he secretly wanted to be eliminated. He's a coward at heart, and the only reason why he's in the tournament at all is because he was bullied into it by Remus, Sirius, and James; so he's using this as his ticket out. At the same time, he's all about the self-preservation, so that's why he was sitting there hiding in disguise. So when he found out that Cedric thought he was eliminating Tonks but was actually eliminating Peter, he was nothing short of delighted.

Thank you for reading and reviewing!


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Review #6, by Akussa 

19th September 2012:
That was a chilling chapter. I enjoyed it so much, I almost want to read it again (but I want to read the rest as well... hard decision...).

As much as I enjoy the slower, more introspective chapters such as the previous one, I have to admit that these action packed chapters you write are amazing. You were really creative, once again, when it comes to the characters' strategies to both win and protect themselves from the others.

I felt really bad for Fred in this chapter; Tonks' plan was very cruel to him. Anyone else would have been puzzled to find themselves facing a replica of themselves but Fred... I think he'll come out stronger from that though and that this will only be a motivation for him to win and get to see the real George once again. That's my theory now (I change with every chapter)!

Oh and I really loved the setting for this. Once again, this was original and so exciting! I feel like we've heard a lot about the goblin history through the books so it was a nice touch to use this moment in time.

Brilliant chapter, I really, really enjoyed it and can't wait to read the rest. On to the next chapter!!

Author's Response: Hey, Akussa!!

Out of all the chapters in this story, the duel ones were the hardest to write because I knew there would be certain expectations. This was good because it pushed me to write better, since I had built up to each round with three quiet chapters between them; I'm just endlessly thankful that people weren't let down by the duels. Capture the Flag was one of my favorite ones to write!

Poor Fred. :( You're right; if Cedric had found a replica of himself, he probably would have realized it was Tonks. But since it was Fred, it was only natural that he would see himself and see George instead. It definitely does serve as motivation.

Very happy that you liked the setting! I put a lot of effort into these, and into making each setting very different so that it wouldn't feel predictable or redundant. I've personally always had an interest in the goblin rebellion since hearing about it in the books, and so this was like a field trip for me to get to delve into that.

Thank you for reading and reviewing!


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Review #7, by shadowycorner 

21st August 2012:
Wow...just wow again. I have the odd feeling I left a similiar review back after I read the first round. Oh my God, all these flag misunderstandings! Why is Peter laughing? And well, Severus is still the cunning little Slytherin, that's interesting, especially how it turned around with the switching of the flags. That was one brilliant twist after another. Colin's alright, though, even though he fell into a bonfire, right? I hope so. I guess so, nothing can happen to you in Cliodna's Clock.

It was SO sad to see Fred think it was George. that must've really confused him. Oh gosh oh gosh, this entire chapte just took my breath away. A goblin rebellion! You are a genius.

Also, one thing I REALLY liked was how you described the magic happening, how it goes from the heart through the flesh and arm straight into the victim, both when James and Snape were performing spells. I love delving into Snape's perception of dark magic, it really brings out his fascination with the dark arts, not because he'd like to hurt and control people like Voldemort, but simply because even darker and sinister things can be fascinating. Those are the little details that make this amazing story even better. Wonderful job, again!

Author's Response: Peter's laughing because he's awful. Severus's Slytherin aspects put him at an advantage for a while, except it blew up in his face in the end, and yep, Colin's all right! Injuries sustained in the Pensieve disappear after contestants go back to reality. I find it highly amusing that readers were concerned about Colin falling into the bonfire but no one mentioned Vincent basically being eaten by a plant. XD Chuckling a lot about that.

Poor Fred. :(

Eee goblin rebellion! When Harry studied about History of Magic, I found it fascinating even though he found it boring. I would seriously read all of those textbooks if they were real.

I'm glad you liked the bit about magic coming from the heart before it comes from the wand, and about Severus's appreciation of how magic works. Even Dark magic, like you said, can be fascinating.

Thank you for reading and reviewing!


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Review #8, by MagicalInk 

23rd June 2012:
Merlin how I loved this chapter.
And I just noticed how this story doesn't have as much action as the title and summary would suggest, yet it isn't bothering. I mean, sure this isn't the best chapter to comment on this, but most of the story revolves around characterization. Which is lovely.

I loved your choice of location for this round, it was really original and angst-y with the statue burning and all :3 You may have already noticed, but my reviews for your story are more comments on the greatness of it as I really don't have a lot of CC to give.

I love Crabbe's thoughts particularly, he's just so naive and clumsy and grumpy. And Slytherin.
I don't know if I'd have cared if Peter lost his soul, my thought on him are pretty conflicted, but I loved how they were all carrying others flags and how it came all so convoluted.

Anyway, HA! Snape! I love the Snape/James hate, it was so real and I'll probably miss it. Actually, there'll probably still be some more in the next chapters and I hope Lily and Severus will come to something! Don't get me wrong, I'm certainly not talking about flowers or anything, but if they'd just speak and fix it all. I know James will never forgive him and it pains me (for James) but it's realistic and the can't stay like this forever.

I just love James so much. But I'm really rooting for Tonks to win. I mean, she even wrote a letter and got less time with her son than James. So please tell me you're eliminating him before he can die! I can't stand the thought of some of the characters I love losing their soul.

Personally, I feel Fred is slightly too conflicted to keep his mind focused and win, and Colin is too naive (just like Crabbe). As for Cedric, I don't know what to think of him. He's nice and I like him, but I feel like I missed something? His motivations? This is a character I'm waiting for 'streams of consciousness' as to why he's there and all. I wouldn't want him to loose his soul because I wouldn't want anyone but that's all I feel for him.

And I'm also looking forward to some Marauders' pranks or something childish :) And some tempered Lily.
And more founders!

Gaaah, guess i just love everything about this story.

Except the whole loosing-your-soul-forever(-or-not?) part.

;)

Author's Response: Haa, in the middle stages of plotting out this story I'd planned for it to largely focus on the duels, which would make the duels closer together rather than spaced apart by three intervening chapters between them, but decided that I wanted to describe the ordinary day-to-day life of everyone, so this has ended up being pretty characterization-driven. ^ ^

I was excited to write about this setting because I've always been interested in the Goblin Rebellion. I really wish JKR had the time and inclination to sit down and write out 1,000-page Potterverse textbooks about all of that rich history. I'm like Hermione in that I would devour Hogwarts: A History with my eyeballs.

Peter's out of the running now, which is half good because this means he can't get the prize, and half bad because this means that someone who's a better person might die in his place instead.

Snape, Lily, and James is a running plot point in the background. I promise to tie just about every loose end by the story's conclusion, so you'll have to keep an eye out for that. ;)

Ha, I love hearing your thoughts and theories! Cedric's motivations aren't as direct as the others': he's mainly just entering for something to do. He entered for the same reason that he entered the Triwizard Tournament; he likes a challenge and he wants glory. Cedric in a tournament is Cedric in his element.

I promise that there is something Marauderish in store as well as something childish, but whether or not both occur simultaneously, I cannot tell. :3 And you've definitely not seen the last of the founders! I have 31 chapters planned and I'm currently writing chapter 23, so there's a bit to go and lots of stuff left to include. :D

Thank you endlessly for reading and for your super awesome reviews!


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Review #9, by cazvalleygirl 

20th June 2012:
Hello, itís me again :)

This is without doubt my favourite chapter so far and that is hugemungus compliment by the way because every single chapter is fantastic! I loved the memory and I canít wait to read on and see what other memories you have chosen to use as settings for the duels.

Have I mentioned how bloody amazingly creative you are!!! Only about a million times! But itís so true. How you came up with this whole idea and have kept it going is amazing.

And SNAPEÖ.YOUÖGOTÖRIDÖBut I think his elimination will work in his favour. After all James is still in the game, and while heís off in the pensive in the upcoming rounds Lily will be alone. Maybe this will be Snapeís opportunity to talk to the love of his life? Iím glad to see the back of Peter; he makes me feel a little bit sick lol! His manic laugh was chilling!

I have no idea who I want to see in the final. My favourites are Cedric, Fred and Tonks but if they reach the final thereís a chance they might lose their soul forever, ARGH! Iím so conflicted!

The only reason I can comprehend why this story isnít on its millionth review is because it takes a certain degree of intelligence and patience to keep up with it and your brilliant writing! Itís so full of detail and the characters are so true to the ones J.K created.

Iím super excited to read the next chapter and hope to see more of the Grotta residents at some point : )

Well done, Charlotte x

Author's Response: Hi, Charlotte!

If you keep giving me such lovely reviews, I am going to get a massive ego. XD

Interesting thought about Snape. I won't say whether or not he tries that. :3 I don't think anyone's sorry to see the back of Peter, except that now this means that he won't be eligible to have his soul destroyed in place of someone else. Cedric, Fred and Tonks seem to be frontrunners in the favorites department! All three of them are such good people, it's not hard to see why you like them.

Baww, thank you. I like to think that this story isn't a super mindless read, and that it requires some thought on the part of the reader.

You will definitely see more of the Grotta residents at some point. :)

Thank you, as always, for reading and reviewing!


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Review #10, by Jess the Enthusiast 

19th June 2012:
Hi there! Sorry I didn't review before; I've been so behind on my reading this past week! That out of the way, THIS CHAPTER WAS AMAZING!!! The objectives for the rounds are so creative and so very interesting! I /loved/ how this was capture the flag, because in a way, that sounds like a lot of fun! Reading how the whole round played out was so cool as a reader and your detail, as always, was incredible!
I'm a bit bitter sweet when it comes to Snape and Pettigrew (it was really clever how you offed them, by the way) because they were a part of the group of people that it wouldn't, you know, /kill/ me if they were eliminated in the final round. Now all I have is Crabbe and he hasn't done much to reassure me except be so stupid that he may just last because no one views him as a threat. But you know what? It may not be much, but it might just be enough.
But anywho, I love James and I wish he wasn't already married to Lily so that he could marry me. I'm a bit disappointed in him for using an Unforgivable on Snape, but I'm willing to over look that.
I'm so excited for the next chapter to come out (I'm assuming that since tomorrow is Wednesday, it'll be out sometime during the day so yay for me!!!) Wonderful chapter :D

10/10

~Jess :)

Author's Response: Eee! Hi, Jess!

Yay yay yay, so pleased you liked it! I was pretty excited to post this particular chapter because it's one of the few ones that shows a lot of POV's in one short span of time, and it was fun to fly from one head to another and to imagine their various strategies.

lol Crabbe is the only person left that people are hoping will lose. Poor Vincent!

Baww James and his use of an Unforgivable. He was just a teensy bit angry with Snape, methinks. Still charming on the whole, though!

Yep, the next chapter's up tomorrow!

Thank you so much for reading and reviewing! I always love hearing your thoughts on this story and responding to your lovely reviews.

- Sarah


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Review #11, by pennyardelle 

19th June 2012:
Loved the setting for this round of the duel--so creative, just as the last one was.

I wasn't sure exactly what had happened with Fred seeing George--had Tonks transformed into Fred in order to lure Peter in, and then Fred saw her and assumed it was George? If so, that's really sad, but clever on your part. It kind of showed more of Tonks' Auror qualities than we saw in the books.

I couldn't believe Snape got eliminated! That was crazy how his plan backfired on him. I didn't expect Snape and Peter to be out this early, but then, I wonder if their own motivations weren't exactly enough to help them reach the end. Peter was basically forced to sign up, and what would Snape even do if he won? Would there be any reason that he'd feel compelled to revisit earth? He didn't give up in the duel, of course, but I wonder if it wouldn't have been enough as the rounds progressed.

Also just wanted to say that I really liked the conversation in the last chapter about the nature of the tournament, and whether it's fixed. There was definitely an undercurrent of discontent in it, which is intriguing. I wonder if it'll become a bigger part of the story as it progresses.

Now I'm getting legitimately afraid that it's going to be Tonks vs. James in the end. There is a small and rational part of my mind that sees how incredibly poignant and gripping that would be, but another part that says NO NO NO NO.

Another awesome chapter, and now that I've read them all, I'll be maniacally waiting for the next. :P

Author's Response: Hello again!

Yep, you're right about Tonks and Fred! Tonks was planning to attack Peter, but decided to pose as someone else so that if she successfully ran off with Peter's flag and he came back to look for her, he wouldn't be looking for /her/, because he would have thought someone else had taken it from him. And since the opposite team was invisible and Peter wouldn't believe it if she'd impersonated any of them, she could only choose between Cedric and Fred for other people to pretend to be; it was just by chance that she posed as Fred rather than Cedric. She had no idea that Fred saw her, or that he would think he had seen George. :( I feel quite bad for poor Fred. Being a Metamorphmagus has such amazing potential that I didn't feel was thoroughly explored in the books. If I had those abilities and was fighting in the Battle of Hogwarts, I would be morphing appearances every two minutes just to throw off my attackers.

Yeah, I don't think that there's really any incentive on Earth for Snape. He only wanted to win because of the competition between himself and James, but if James was eliminated I think he would be trying to figure a way out of the tournament. I don't think Snape has enough motivation to win.

So glad you liked this chapter! I update every Wednesday. :D

Thank you for reading and reviewing!

- Sarah


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Review #12, by peppersweet 

19th June 2012:
how do you even have this much imagination omg this is amazing

SNAPE. NO. omg.

so caught up in this can barelty type spelling everything wrong

AAAH

AAAH OMG

COLIN!

!!!1!1!1!!!11!11!

!!!

!
!!!

ASDGHHJHJDSHGDS!!!

sorry nope can't speak no words UPDATE SOON YOU, YOU THING. SDFDFSAH



Author's Response: LOOOL, you give me the lulz. For cereal, so excited that you're reading this story. SO AWESOME TO POP ON HERE AND SEE YOUR NAME EVERYWHERE, LEAVING ME CAPSLOCK AND ETC. So weee!

P.S. I update every Wednesday!

THANK YOU FOR BEING A LOVELY PERSON. ♥


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Review #13, by dirtydeedsdonedirtcheap 

18th June 2012:
I was not expecting those two to be eliminated so early! I really thought they would go for Tonks but now I fear what's going to happen next. Now I think it's going to be Tonks and James which would be horrible.

I think Cedric is a contender but him and Fred are friends and they are either going to have to save each other or let the other go on to the next round or just let Tonks win even though they would like to because they really wouldn't be able to defeat her. Then again Fred does know Tonks' weaknesses but it still doesn't seem like he could defeat her and really I think the thought of dying all together would scare him too much. Cedric would like to win but I think the thought of not having a friend or just having to move on when he just got a new friend is something he wouldn't want to deal with.

Crabbe, well, I'm not sure he really knows anything so honestly I have no comments about him. It would be quite the blood bath if you had James to be the final victim on the Mortuus side so that's why I think it could be him.

I don't know...because it really might not be Tonks/James. That would be obvious right? Hm...!

Author's Response: I love your theories! You're spot on about Cedric - he'd like to win for the sake of winning, but he'd rather stick around Cliodna's Clock with his new friends.

Crabbe, lol. I suppose that his real danger is that Salazar is whispering instructions in his ear.

Eeep, thank you once again for reading and for your lovely reviews!


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Review #14, by Ardeith 

18th June 2012:
This was such a great chapter! So much action, so many twists and turns! I don't know how you keep track of all the characters -- I would have to draw maps or something! I love how each character eliminated was not the one targeted.

As always, you add a dimension that takes it deeper. Several characters here were influenced by the fact that people in general and in specific were watching and judging their actions.

I forget ...are injuries incurred in the rounds real? Will Colin be suffering from his burns going forward or will he be back to normal once they get out of the Pensieve?

I'm so emotionally involved with the characters. There are people I want eliminated like now! And ones I hope win...I was so upset to see Severus eliminated and felt so bad when Fred thought he saw George. (Will Fred be haunted by that or will he realize it was Tonks?)

Author's Response: Hello, Ardeith! So pleased that you liked this chapter! I basically had to write a miniature version of this chapter beforehand so that I could follow them all more clearly, deciding who would do what and when. It was so much fun, planning it out. I am such a nerd. :P

Nope, injuries do not last outside of the Pensieve. I should probably mention that somewhere in the story... XD But no worries, Colin is perfectly fine. :)

I'm so excited about your investment! And I'm curious to know about who you would like to win and who you would like to lose.

Thank you so much for reading and reviewing!


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Review #15, by Hogwarts27 

14th June 2012:
Excellent chapter! Loved every bit of it, all the different strategies - it was brilliant, entertaining, exciting. I wasn't expecting Snape's tactic to work, but I also didn't expect it to not work like that. Terrific! Can't wait for more. I'm not even rooting for anyone in particular. It's entertaining enough just to see how this will go.

Author's Response: Thank you! I had so much fun writing this chapter, switching from POV to POV and getting into the heads of each individual person as they decided which strategy to use. Snape did a not-so-nice thing, thinking that if James attacked him and took his flag, Colin's flag would end up being the one that got destroyed. But it backfired on him! That's what he gets for being too clever for his own good. I find it very interesting that you're not rooting for anyone in particular. I imagine that that will make the winners and losers of each round more pleasant to watch, because you won't have to worry about favorites getting the boot.

Thank you so much for reading and reviewing!


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Review #16, by Rumbleroar goes roar 

14th June 2012:
I loved the non-stop action in this chapter! So exciting! I love how Snape got knocked out - being too clever for his own good there :)
Can't wait to see what happens next!

Author's Response: Hooray! I'm glad you liked it! I love writing action. ^ ^ Snape definitely got his comeuppance for being sneaky. That's what he gets for trying to mess with Colin! -shakes fist-

Thank you for reading and reviewing!


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Review #17, by WitnesstoitAll 

13th June 2012:
HOLY WOW WOMAN. WHERE DO I EVEN BEGIN?

You are so talented that you are literally blinding. Where do you cram all this imagination and creativity? Like, wow. Honestly, if I never read HP and was reading this, I'm pretty sure I'd love it just as much. This world, this concept, everything you describe is so fresh and vibrant and holy wow, pal. I may have said this before and not to discredit any of the other brilliant stories on this site, but this is one of the most engaging and well written stories I've ever read. This is such a fresh take on the world of afterlife fics and HP fanfiction in general.

Now that my squeeing generalities are through, let me actually get to this chapter. I think the thing that stood out to me the most was the very tangible sense of intensity. You changed characters at just the right time and flashed from scene to scene so well that I literally was leaning forward an inch from my screen trying to soak it all in. (eye sight, what's that even?)

It was so fascinating to see each character's strategy and how they approached this challenge. It really says a lot about them as a character. Snape is /SUCH/ a slytherin. I'm not going to bad talk him for Rachel's sake but I loathed him in this chapter and was so, so glad that his craftiness got him in the end. He just really needs to grow up and move on. geez. Tonks' tactics were clever, and not very noble, I suppose, but she at least didn't steal some poor adorable colin's flag. I felt so badly for Fred when he saw George standing there. I mean, I know how much he probably misses his brother and seeing his face, and to know it's really Tonks. gahhh. so many weasley twin feels.

The scene with the hydra was probably my favorite as far as description goes. I had seen a snippet of it before and loved it, but in context it was even better. Cedric, I am liking you more and more as this story goes on.

The end was fairly epic and a half. Homer who? Oddessey, what? The fact that the two knocked out were agaisnt what it seemed really spoke to the notion discussed in the past chapter about whether or not the tournament is fixed. Now here we are with Tonk, Cedric and Fred and James, Colin and Crabbe left in the tournament. All characters that we care about and one underdog. Of course it would come down to this. freaking cliodna. But then again it could also speak to a cruel sort of notion of fate. I don't know, but this was fabulous and you are fabulous and alsjfowiejfowiejfoweijf

(Had to add a good keyboard smash for good measure)

Love.

Author's Response: MEL MEL MEL ♥

Your review is so squishy and it fills me with feels, and it was doubly satisfying because I got to read your commentary on skype while you progressed through the chapter.

Your compliments are going to inflate my head so large that I will start to orbit the sun, I swear. You will be able to look through a telescope and see a giant Sarah head making her way around space, collecting a few moons here and there. I'M SO ENDLESSLY THRILLED THAT YOU LIKE THIS STORY. (hug)

Snape was very devious in this chapter. I kept picturing him like...oh my god I cannot think of his name. But he's the mask that everyone wears in V for Vendetta. With the big evil smile and all that.

Tonks wasn't exactly noble, no. I suppose she's taking a page out of Lily's book here and just operating on the desire to win. What I liked best about writing this scene was how so many of them defied Cliodna's expectations by almost breaking the rules, but not quite - switching flags, hiding them, and transfiguring them, but not exactly damaging them as the rules prohibited - because I like to think that this particular set of characters plays by their own rules.

I'm becoming quite fond of Cedric. A tournament like this is sort of tailored for his personality. When I was writing the hydra scene, I pictured it like a comic book strip - the hydra was huge and really disgusting and slimy-looking, and Cedric was super-beefy because comic book illustrators always make the heroes muscular beyond physical reason.

YOU ARE FABULOUS. Fact. ♥

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:D


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Review #18, by TenthWeasley 

13th June 2012:
This is going sound like the biggest of all exaggerations, but I felt this chapter, man. I'm all shuddery and I feel like I've just jumped off a bridge and I am torn between grinning like mad and curling up in a ball while blasting depressing songs. THIS CHAPTER, IT DID THINGS TO ME. All expectations of coherency, you'd best get rid of them right this very second. Right now.

Severus gazed down on James through half-lidded eyes, his upper lip curling with derision. -- AARGH DO YOU REALIZE HOW GOOD YOU ARE. Snape in particular in this chapter was just asdfghjkl; I cannot even type. Everything he does and says is just so canon and I can't even begin to fathom how you do it. You are going to teach me to write like this. And the best thing -- the best -- was that he and his arrogance thought he had it all figured out, didn't he? Using Colin to try and cheat his way out (except he was within rules but just barely). Oh, Sev. Sev. You are so brilliant, Sarah. There is no other way you could have written that. PERFECT.

Cedric. Cedric. ♥ ♥ No one else can write him ever. From the moment he came into the chapter with the fabric in his teeth AAGH I'M HAVING MOMENTS AGAIN. I could see so, so clearly -- more than any other parts of this chapter -- how you led him through this particular round, because it's exactly how I'd have done it. Not, of course, that I could write this; do not make me laugh with derision. But you've got all of his canon qualities here and I tried picking out a quote for him like I did for Snape, and I'd literally highlighted two straight paragraphs and was like, "Oh, better not do this." And I still have tears in my eyes, darn you, because he is the best and you are the best and I want to read more Cedric forever. ASDFGHJKL WHAT IS WRONG WITH MEEE.

And then some plot things happened and I can't function anymore because I've just spent all my energy mentally shaking Snape and mentally flinging my arms about Cedric whilst simultaneously waving a little pennant for him and his victory. ♥ I am so sorry for this is advance. Someday I will put our review side-by-side and you shall agree with me that mine suck 5ever because, oh, hey, point out one mention of plot in this. Nope, it's all blubbering. I CAN'T HELP IT, THIS STORY WRENCHES MY HEART.

Yarp. I cannot leave you coherent reviews anymore. Preeetty sure that's out the window. ♥ Oh God, this chapter. One of the best things (not chapters, mind, things) you've ever written. You're seriously one of the most inventive people I know and you just keep topping yourself time and again. I don't even know what to do anymore.

I WILL STOP TYPING NOW IF YOU PROMISE TO UPDATE IMMEDIATELY ON TIME NEXT WEEK. ♥ ♥

Author's Response: Argh your reviews! I love reading them and I dread responding to them. I always feel like I'm not doing them justice or conveying my appreciation properly. ANYWAY~

One of my favorite things about Snape is how underhanded he can be. He's very sneaky - I mean, he successfully lied to Voldemort's face many times over. One could wonder if, after so much of that success, Snape began to feel a little bit empowered, overestimating his abilities. I think sometimes he needs for his plans to blow up in his face so that he can stop being smug for a while. Using poor Colin. :( Very rude, Snape!

Aghh Cedric! As I keep telling you, I write him solely for you because I'm pretty sure that no one likes Cedric as much as you do. So when I wrote this chapter I wanted to give him some of his brawny roar-I-am-a-warrior spotlight. I think that out of all of them, Cedric would be the only one to have the guts to take on a hydra and kill it.

lulz, I wonder what you would have done if I'd made the final round Cedric vs Snape. You would probably kill me. Bahaha, at least one of them is safe now!

I WILL DEFFO UPDATE IMMEDIATELY ON TIME. ♥

Thank you so much for being you! ♥ (hug) You are such a wonderful friend.


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Review #19, by jellylegs2066 

13th June 2012:
Hi,

I've been reading this for a while and never written a review, which is really lax of me. I have to go back and write them, but I thought I'd start off at writing one for this chapter.

You have such a good grasp of the characters! Each of their strategies was very much in keeping with their characters, especially Severus. He was in Slytherin for a reason! He really does remind me of Salazar. I find it interesting that the Slytherin who is most in keeping with Salazar is the half-blood; it is almost as though the preoccupation with "pureblood" is not the most important Slytherin qualification-- that it is cunning which is /so/ much more important. Trying to make James off Colin! It's so much in keeping with him, and I find it so ironic that it ended up working against him. James has such a high moral code, that I think he would have been devestated to find that he had killed Colin, who is so much younger and so much more unexperienced than him. However, I also find it interesting that it is James who has removed both people from his team from the duel so far. James was thought to lack the personality that could do so-- yet in terms of averages, he's doing best out of everyone.

I love Tonks in this chapter. I wondered why she hadn't used her metamorphamagus powers much in the Clock, and it makes such sense that she would use them in the races. I was surprised she chose to impersonate Fred, I don't know why, but I was. Oh Fred! When he thought it was George... I felt so sorry for him, and I almost felt cross at Tonks! Surely since she knew both the twins she should have realised what would happen to Fred if he saw her as himself! Poor Fred :(

I can't believe Crabbe is still in it, though I think it's quite easy to underestimate him. Stupid he may have been throughout most of the books, but he /adored/ the Carrows' lessons. Surely he must have picked something up? Besides, Draco wouldn't have picked him as a lackey if it wasn't for his physical strength-- which would be quite useful in a task such as this, where magic wasn't always helpful. It did make me laugh though, that he actually managed to get James' flag (cruel James, wanting Severus to be knocked out of the races in the same way he died!) but then splinched himself and left it behind. I had this bizarre mental image of a crawling cartoon hand.

I don't know which type of your chapters I prefer- the more character based ones or the action of the duels. I love delving into your superb characterisations of them and well-thought out description of Cliodna's Clock. You have such a high understanding of it, it really is applause worthy. If you ever wrote a original fic, I would really want to read it-- your attention to detail is brilliant. On the other hand, the pace of this chapter and the previous duel chapter was amazing; it really drew me in and I wanted to know who went out so badly! I still have no idea who will be ejected in the end. It would be easiest for it to be Crabbe, yet that would probably lack the emotional sorrow. I feel that we haven't go to know Crabbe as well as the others yet, but his friendship with Goyle and to a lesser extent Draco, who he probably felt highly resentful of, could cause some sympathy for him. Poor Crabbe, always being made to feel so stupid! I never really liked him much in the books, but I feel he could be interesting to explore.

I just hope you don't make Tonks or Fred lose-- I love both of them so much. But then /James/. He just /can't/ go out; I think i'd cry. And Colin! But that leaves Cedric and I love Cedric... you're much too cruel to make us have to think of this! When characters die in normal fics, you at least have the idea of an afterlife; in this, they seem definitely gone. But then, like Dumbledore said, what is the proof that they actually disappear? Maybe all of the people Lily's knocked out are actually have a whale of a time bowing down to her for letting them getting into the uber-underworld, rocking party town ;)

10/10 for this and every chapter. Your spelling and grammar is wonderful, and each chapter is really well written, which makes the story ten times better. I can't wait to read more.

Author's Response: Holy wow, this review! I'm so intimidated to try to respond to it. You are just incredible.

No worries about going back and reviewing all the past chapters! Sometimes when I'm rushing through a story, I prefer to just marathon it without reviewing each chapter individually, and then I'll review the last posted chapter. It's just so much easier.

I agree on so many levels about the most prized quality in Slytherin house being cunning rather than blood purity. Like, Morfin and Marvolo were both pure blood Slytherins, and they weren't exactly brilliant. But then Snape, the half-blood, could arguably run circles around all of the other Slytherins because of how intelligent he is. In this case, though, Snape's cunning definitely backfired on him. If he'd just stayed put at the fire and allowed himself to be blown back, Colin's flag would have burned with him. I think that Severus's desire to win this round was due more to beating James than to winning any prize. He just wanted to show that he was superior. Oh Severus, when will you ever learn?! And James is a bit of a dark horse, isn't he, surprising everyone by winning both the first and second round?

Haha, I purposefully avoided discussing Tonks's metamorphmagus abilities in previous chapters just so that it wouldn't be on the brains of her opponents, and so that it would be more of a surprise. And since she was going to use being a Metamorphmagus to confuse her opponents, it would make sense that she impersonated one of them. It was either Cedric or Fred, since she was going after Peter, so she just so happened to choose Fred. I felt so bad for poor Fred there. :(

A crawling cartoon hand! Ha, that's an image I had as well! Actually, if you've ever seen the Addams Family, there is this little hand called 'The Thing' that kind of crawls around, and that image was nesting in my head while I was writing it.

I love seeing your thoughts on who might win/who should win vs. who you don't want to lose. All of them have merit, after all, even poor, dimwitted Crabbe. This review seriously made my month, and I'm so grateful that you took the time to leave such a thorough, wonderful review.

:)



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