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20 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Veritaserum27 

7th May 2015:
Hey there, Dan! Iím attempting to make up for my apparent absence from this story. Iím so, so sorry! But I LOVED this chapter. It took me forever to read through it - and then I realized why. Nine thousand words is a lot - even for you. However, I think it was totally worth it - there wasnít anything that you could cut out. I feel like so much happened here and, at the same time, you laid out some details that are important to the mystery.

I love the way you describe the magic of the castle. It is spot on with what J.K. depicts with the special enchantments - and how Hogwarts has so much magic within it - that the powers and the depth of the spells exceed the abilities of any one wizard.

HmmmÖ Professor Astor - a secondary character that is briefly mentioned and comes back in the end orÖ someone truly trustworthy?

If he was being completely honest with himself, she had more than a few legitimate reasons to be angry with him.

What happened?

Iím not sure what to think of Esme. On one hand, she might be the kick in the pants that Harry needs right now. Heís still in a really dark place. On the other hand - she seems to enjoy instigating - and she seems to be a bit stubborn in her own right. Sheís carrying around a forty-five year old grudge.

Esme seems visibly upset about Ginnyís death. Could it be an act? She is an auror in a nearby country - and Harry Potterís wife is murdered and he is put on trialÖ Is she hiding what she knows? Either way, she seems to be an extremely competent Auror. She is smart and quick.

Great job describing the memory forgery. Iím picturing the wizarding version of photoshop :)

About six years ago, she resigned and simply vanished.

Ö and then came to work as the British Minister of Magicís secretary???

Octavia sounds like a real piece of work. I love her. She reminds me of her motherÖ And she seems to be extraordinarily gifted. Haha - Scorpius canít remember if Arithmetic and Arithmancy are the same - and he knows his daughter is smart enough to tell if heís faking it. Iím loving the interactions of these two. Much of his parenting seems to be done on the fly - but I guess thatís best when dealing with a clever daughter!

Ah! So Lady Tenabraís name is known amongst the pure bloods? Do the Aurors know yet - who the leader is?

And I almost feel sorry for the way you turn Daphne into a clown. Almost.

I can see the point of Rose and Scorpius not wanting to hide Octavia away - especially when the other Weasleys are not in hiding. BUT - things are much more dangerous for Draco and Astoria in Britain. Staying out of things might become a bit tricky for the Malfoys.

Poor Hermione. Sheís worked so hard to build a career and a reputation and to have it crushed to smithereens while she fought to protect others is downright adding insult to injury. Of course she takes her solace in research and books.

Great job with your minstrel poem! Like everything youíve done with this story - it is clever and rich in text.

And I love the scene from Ronís POV. It was brilliantly characterized. I giggled throughout this entire scene. And while I couldnít entirely disagree with Ron, I was greatly amused at the same time.

Romantic mishap - haha. I wonder if weíll ever get to know what really happened :) And Iím tearing up over the tender Ron and Hermione moment.

And - of course Harry is bungling things up again. I canít exactly fault Esme for being irritated at this one. You would expect someone with his credentials to be less clueless at the age of sixty-five!

Hermys is awesome. And so loyal to Harry.

Holy cow. I did not see this coming. I guess I really should have - based on the document that Lady Tenabra forged in the last chapter, but I didnít think things would move so quickly. Yikes - this sounds so eerily familiar - the ministry disregarding laws so that they can ďkeep the peace,Ē the muggle-borns being threatened and everyone afraid to speak out for fear of unknown retribution. This is not going to be solved quickly.

I really thought Harry was telling Hermys to get the invisibility cloak - and I couldnít remember if it was at Hogwarts with one of his grandkids - didnít Harry ask Arthur if he could borrow it?

Anyway, THIS WAS SO MUCH BETTER! Holy cow. The things you come up with! It was clever and funny and really, really effective. I mean, those guys didnít know what hit them. And just when I thought it was over, you send ANOTHER insane booby trap at them. The ďsnotty batsĒ felt a little like an homage to Ginny. I wonder if she had some say in the houseís protections or if Harry added them after her death, as a way to remember what an amazingly powerful witch she was.

Ah! So I guess Esme is with them now. It seems a bit odd - Iím so used to the trio being one unit. I felt like Harry was being a bit dramatic at first - but then I realized, heís the only one who is reading the situation for as dire as it is.

Time to call in The Order.

♥ Beth

Author's Response: Hi, Beth! I'm going to skip the formality of apologizing for the fact that it took me forever to respond. When in doubt, assume I'm sorry. ;)

The is the second chapter in a row that somehow ended up a lot longer than I'd planned. I thought about splitting this one, but I couldn't figure out where. It felt like all of this needed to stay together.

I'm glad you liked my thoughts on what makes Hogwarts so magical. It always felt to me like the castle was sort of like a living thing with a mind of its own.

You'll find out fairly soon what happened between Harry and Esme. It's complicated and the details come out gradually over the next few chapters. All I would say about Esme is that there are reasons why she behaves the way she does. Hopefully that will all be cleared up for you soon. She wasn't so much upset that Ginny died; the two characters never met. She was more upset when she realized how insensitive she was being. Whatever other personality traits she might have, she is a professional.

You'll hear a lot more about the forged memory. I'm glad you liked the concept and I hope you'll continue to like it.

Rose and Scorpius are feeling a lot of conflicting loyalties at this point. Of course they want to do what's best for Octavia and of course they feel some level of loyalty to both families. They're caught in the middle.

Whew! I'm still not sure whether I like the poem, so I'm glad you like it! Fun fact: I didn't mark it as original work the first time I submitted it and my chapter got rejected. I guess you're not the only one who thought it sounded authentic.

I enjoyed writing every bit of the cocktails and dinner scene. Ron's PoV made it even more fun, but it would have been entertaining no matter who was observing. The interplay between the characters worked out better than I could have hoped for.

Lady Tenabra takes her plan to the next level at the end of this chapter. She fully intended to eliminate Harry, Ron and Hermione, but she left the execution of the plan in less than competent hands. If she has one weakness, it's that she tends to play puppet-master a little too much.

I had a blast writing all of the house's defenses. "Snotty bats" was definitely homage to Ginny.

You're right, Esme has joined in the adventure. We'll soon see how that works out. Like I said, she's an Auror. She's used to being throw together with a team on a mission with an uncertain outcome.

Interesting you should mention the Order. Read on...

Thanks so much for reading and reviewing!


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Review #2, by GingeredTea 

27th January 2015:
I somehow submitted my last review before I meant too - I didn't get to talk about Hermione's struggle at work or Lucy, or some key points of Percy's issue, among other things. Anyways, the last chapter had me on the edge of my seat.

Okay, onto this one...

Esme Osinalde; I think you're teasing us with this blond hair. just really, I think you are. I'm seeing her everywhere and wondering at every turn!

The scene with Esme made me second guess myself a bit...but then I wondered, was Harry's "oh crap" about him thinking she thinks he's interested, or because he's a little suspicious?

We haven't seen Ocatvia much but I really think she's hilarious! Of course, being bullied isn't funny, But Scorpius losing control of his magic was and her reenactment was both funny and terrible.

Astoria is good for Draco, obviously.

That was a bit tense with Esme there for a bit, and then it got way worse. I have to say though, James Potter would be proud of Harry's defenses. They were very prank-like. LOL

I was surprised Esme agreed to go with them, but after all of that tension you managed to make me laugh with Hermys' thoughts about Harry's grandchildren.

Author's Response: Ugh. On the one hand, I get the point of not being able to edit reviews after they're submitted. The drama potential is off the charts. On the other hand, it's awfully inconvenient sometimes.

I didn't realize just how many blonde witches were running around this story until somebody pointed it out in a review several chapters farther along. I also slipped up and changed Esme's hair to brown later. I'm grateful that I have reviewers to point these things out.

Harry is worried that his past with Esme will make it so that she's unwilling to help solve Ginny's murder. Or that she'll hex him. Possibly both.

You'll see Octavia quite a bit more as the story wears on. Keep an eye on her, she's central to the plot.

Draco would be completely lost without Astoria. Literally would not know what to do with himself.

I like to imagine James, Sirius and Remus all smiling down on Harry's accomplishments. Particularly the ones he unleashed on Ministerial Security in this chapter.

Esme agrees to go with them because she sees it as the most interesting way to spend her remaining time in the UK. She doesn't really think it's possible that she's putting herself in danger. She's an Auror and a foreign national. She probably thinks that the worst that could happen is she'd be sent back to France on the first available portkey.

I love Hermys. He's another character that I wish I could have worked into the story more.

Thank you so much for all of the awesome reviews!


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Review #3, by APerkins 

23rd October 2013:
Yay. Action! Adventure!

To busy reading to leave a decent review. :)

In itself is a compliment ;)

Author's Response: Read on, my friend, read on!

Thanks!


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Review #4, by Courtney Dark 

27th July 2013:
Do you know that feeling when you're sitting with your laptop in the sun and every little bit of dust in the world seems to be sticking to your laptop screen? Yep, that's what I'm going through right now (sigh) so I'll make this review nice and quick - sorry for putting you through my me-rant, by the way.

Anyway, so much happened in this chapter that I don't really know how to begin! Esme...hmmm, I'm not sure whether I like her yet or not. She definitely has huge potential as a character and I am looking forward to finding more out about her. Her relationship with Harry is certainly...interesting, to say the least.

I enjoyed the dinner scene, as well. Oh, Ron!

I always enjoy the scenes from Scorpius' point of view and this one was no exception. I particularly liked the line about Scorpius being quite proud of his parenting skills - that me laugh. And Octavia is absolutely adorable!

That poem was really well written - I absolutely suck at things like that! I tried to write a sorting hat song and a short rhyme for one of my stories and failed miserable, so nice work on that!

Oooh, the last scene was great! (I've just now realized that this review is talking about scenes in a complete random order.) I wish I could say something more interesting about it, but my brain is feeling a little confuzzled right now, so I'll just say that I'm looking forward to the next chapter and that Hermys rocks! And sorry for yet another random, waffly, incoherent review.

Courtney:)

Author's Response: I have that feeling with the monitor for my desktop computer all the time. It's a little old, so it's not the brightest any more and the room is kind of dusty and the lighting is bad. Suffice it to say, trying to watch a really dark scene in any video is a complete waste of time.

I hope Esme grows on you. She'll be around for a while. She's not a bad person, really, just very blunt and sarcastic and she has quite a grudge against Harry. Why, you may ask? You'll soon find out...

The dinner scene was a blast to write. I'm glad you liked it. Tipsy Ron is probably my favorite PoV to write in the entire HP fandom.

Scorpius is never going to win any Father of the Year awards, but the poor guy does his best. Nothing in his life before Rose prepared him to function while surrounded by so many females packing Weasley genes. It really isn't fair. I'm really glad you like Octavia. She is fairly central to the story.

Augh, the poem! I've recovered from the trauma enough to be able to talk about it coherently now. Suffice it to say that when you write your own poem, you're well advised to put that in your author's notes. Otherwise, there could be... misunderstandings.

Hermys is pretty awesome, isn't he? I love house elves. They're so much fun to have in a story!

Yay! You're into the really heavy action now. Lots of crazy stuff coming soon! Thanks for reading and reviewing!


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Review #5, by TheHeirOfSlytherin 

7th February 2013:
I'm not so sure how I feel about this Esme woman. Then again, Harry... What where you thinking? I kinda agreed with Ron when he wanted to hurt him. :P

This was such an exciting chapter, with the men having to fight their way in and getting a little bit closer to the woman, if it is the same one as the woman Esme talked about. I've learnt not to think about things much when I read this, make assumptions - so many twists and turns and surprises. I like that. :D

And now they're, like, on the run. Again. It's so awesome, the action and what's to come in this story, not necessarily the running again. Harry and Hermione talking about it not being like the war because they'll be ready this time must have brought back more memories.

Amazing chapter!

Sam.

Author's Response: Hello, again!

So I'm rather pleased that you feel ambiguous about Esme. She's definitely not the type of character that you warm up to right away. She and Harry have a very complicated history, strongly affected by some of the things that Harry was dealing with in his life around the time they met. Perhaps I'll write that story someday.

This chapter was definitely long on action. I've always loved the idea of Harry being sort of paranoid because of the things he survived as a teenager. So I enjoyed dreaming up all of the booby traps he sets up in his house. My imagination really gets to run wild where his paranoia is concerned over the next few chapters.

So, yes, once again the trio is on the run. And they are much better prepared, although Hermione isn't really any happier about it.

Much to come. Hope you enjoy it.

Thanks for reading and reviewing!


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Review #6, by NearlyHeadless_Nick 

30th October 2012:
Bat bogeys bottled, an impromptu skating rink, just happening to keep a boggart... why would anyone be dumb enough to fight the dude who gave Weasley's Wizard Wheezes their seed gold on his own turf?! Great chapter, as per usual.

Author's Response: True, attacking Harry in his own home wasn't a very good idea. The gauntlet has been thrown down in earnest now.

Thanks for reading and reviewing!


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Review #7, by academica 

10th August 2012:
Hi Dan! I'm back with another requested review!

ESME. I love her. She's got spunk and spirit and I think a woman would have to in order to keep up with Harry Potter. I love this twist, and the way that it implies that Harry had another 'encounter' before really settling down with Ginny. I also like how she's multidimensional, alternately spiteful and kind. In my opinion, she's a very good OC.

The interaction between Scorpius and Octavia was just darling. She's always a bright spot for me in your chapters, and I loved his awkward way of handling parenthood. ("If Calliope transfigured her head into a melon, would you do it, too?" - that made me chuckle.) It's nice to see the Malfoys and their extended family interact in a softer way, and I do fear for them when they return home.

That bit about the poem was interesting! (Nice work, by the way.) I hope Hermione can figure out how the wizard in the poem healed himself so that she doesn't have to be wheelchair-bound forever.

I really loved the scene in Harry's house. Dinner was really funny, especially with Ron stumbling over himself to keep up, and I liked watching Harry and Esme trade barbs at one another. (Poor Hermione, always the peacekeeper!) Things escalated so quickly once that knock on the door came, but I think you pulled it off well. I like that Harry has all these secret defenses, and sometimes I feel like Dobby has been reincarnated in Hermys. He always seems ready and able to help Harry out.

Nice work! I hope this review is helpful :)

Author's Response: Hello, again!

So Esme was one of my proudest accomplishments in this story. I really enjoyed crafting a back story for her and Harry and then gradually evolving their relationship from that rather acrimonious last parting. Yes, Harry did have some, er, "experiences" with other women before he and Ginny were finally married. He's only human, after all, and a famous human at that.

I think of Scorpius as a parent who's trying really hard but is ultimately out of his depth. Octavia is such a precocious child and Scorpius's understanding of how a father relates to his young child is a haphazard attempt to average together the only two role models that he remembers: Draco, who was cold and distant, and Harry, who was doting almost to a fault.

Ah, that poem! Caused me grief with validation. I am very glad that you liked it, because it gave me sleepless nights.

Everything that I wrote in Harry's house was tremendous fun. There's a reason this chapter ended up being so long. I just couldn't help myself. Ron seemed like the perfect narrative voice. As a wise author once wrote, "when in doubt, tell the story through the eyes of the character who knows the least."

Thank you very much for another great review. They are always helpful!


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Review #8, by Pixileanin 

4th June 2012:
I really liked Bill's forward thinking about the spells, redirecting them instead of taking them down. That was a clever move so as not to alert the persons responsible for the monitoring spells.

"Anything that happened prior to the moment her portkey arrives today is going to be a sore spot, Ron. There isn't time to scratch the surface."

Egads! That is not the way I would want to be warned about a meeting with an ex.

Octavia was really cute with Scorpius in this scene. And Astoria seems like a sensible woman. I guess they'll be alright one way or another.

Hermione's new find is very interesting. At least she has something to work with now, however unlikely the source.

"It was really quite miserable..."

Yes, we all believe you Harry. The dialogue that came after was really hilarious. It's funny how time clouds memories of things. Having Ron and Hermione in the room with them, awkwardly listening in as a captive audience made it all the more fun. Hermys to the rescue! Great effect of having the unwanted visitors find all of Harry's defense spells in place.

Fun chapter!

Author's Response: Hello, again, stranger!

I think of Bill as being very wise by this age. He has so much experience as a curse-breaker that he's highly sought-after in situations like this.

Yes, escorting Harry to meet Esme was the worst kind of close encounter for Ron. He held himself together pretty well, I think.

I'm really glad you liked Octavia. She's a precocious child, but not without her problems. Astoria is a very sensible woman. And strong. Her family would be in deep trouble without her.

Hermione keeps chipping away at the mystery, little by little. The information she unearthed in this chapter actually turns out to be quite important.

Ha. Seems that Harry is not the completely naive, innocent guy that most people think of him as. There is quite a story that goes with him and Esme, and it plays out over the next few chapters.

I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter. Thanks for reading and reviewing!


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Review #9, by Janner 

4th June 2012:
I'm amazed at how you maintain the high quality of your writing.
I guess Harry has reached his tipping point.

I would love to see a flashback of Esme and Harry in the mountains. I'm already fond of Esme. Is it too soon to be thinking of her as Ginny's successor?

Great stuff. Keep it coming!

Author's Response: If I ever decided to tell Harry and Esme's story from the Pyrenees, it will have to be as a one-shot. I'm sure it was an interesting, contentious situation.

The entire story has reached a tipping point. Harry, Ron and Hermione are about to go back underground, returning to their roots, as it were.

And I think it's probably too soon to think of Esme as The Next Ginny. Possibilities exist, but they're only that.

Thanks for reading and reviewing!


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Review #10, by Jchrissy 

1st June 2012:
You started me off in a very good mood with this chapter, I have a Bill obsession. I think you may be trying to trick me with Professor Astor, but Iím not taking the bait! Or you arenít trying to trick me, and you are leaving a hint... uh oh. This is another thing I love about your writing style and CoB, I really never know where you will take it. Nor do I think ANY of the characters should feel safe with you at the keyboard! I love the transition into the Esme issue, and am really excited as to what part (other than helping with the memory) she will play in this.

ďAs the lift doors closed, Ron turned to him. ďSo, since you have this history with her, are there any subjects I should avoid? You know, sore spots?Ē


Harry pondered the question for a moment. ďAll of them.Ē It seemed like the only adequate answer.Ē- This could be one of my favorite lines of your story so far. I donít know what it is about it, but I really could not stop laughing. It was just so... Harry.

I also like the conversation that takes place about Ginny. Iím sure Esme has every right to be mad at Harry (but being a woman, I do believe that we have right to be mad at a man for whatever reason we see fit, with the anger lasting an undetermined amount of time, so I might be biased) and he probably deserves the remarks heís getting from her. I think you did an amazing job with Ronís reaction to Esmeís Ginny comment. He really doesnít have a reason to be angry with her in my opinion, hurt, maybe.. but not angry, but itís Ron. We know he doesnít handle emotion well, and heís a bit of a tiny. I think that entire scene was absolutely perfect.

I love that you described what she was doing with the memory, without necessarily retelling it. We know they are in it, we know whatís going on in it, and describing exactly what part she was stoping and doing what at, would have seemed unnecessary. I think you did this flawlessly.

And here we have another clue to the mysterious Lady T... woohoo!

The scene with Scorpius and Octavio is great; the note from Rose and the way father and daughter interact is such a good reminder that itís not one huge family, but a big one built of individual ones. They are their own unit in part of the Weasley/Potter company. I also love that you have made Astoria over all, the one in charge. I think of Draco Malfoy as having that deep down urge to let someone who loves him and cares for him make some of the decisions. I have seen a lot of fanfics pair him with the sweet, precious types. Your character is much more realistic and believable.

The pre dinner scene with the 3 of them really makes me feel like they are back at Hogwarts. Ron angry at Esme for no real reason, Hermione laughing at Harryís lack of knowledge with this subject, and Harry pretty much just clueless.

I love how you continued with Ronís ĎI will not let her take Harry away from Ginnyí attitude. I have praised you mainly for Harryís characterization, but Ronís is just as accurate and perfect.
Iím not sure about my thoughts of Harry cheating on Ginny, though. I hope it will end up being an on a break type thing. They were gone for months Iím sure, and I can see Harry and Ginny having a very fire to gasoline type of relationship, but cheating is still a betrayal. I donít see him ever committing any kind of betrayal against someone he loves. Iím hoping weíll learn that they were on a break or something along those lines ;)! The entire play out of their banter was still hilarious, I like that she brings out the more hot tempered Harry.

And now we are getting into some fast paced action... You better hope for your own safety nothing too bad happens! ;)

Author's Response: Hello, again!

So this chapter was probably the most fun to write out of any so far. It's not that the subject matter was light, per se, but there were a lot of really entertaining moments and a great chance to let Ron be his goofy, loveable, slightly confused self.

I'm glad you enjoyed Bill's appearance in this chapter. Unfortunately, I wasn't able to work him into the story all that much. But he's great to have around when you need that really sage character who's a master with wards and other protective spells.

And then Esme arrives. I wanted her to come into the story with a bang, and I think I was able to achieve that. She does have good reasons to be mad at Harry, although she's not completely innocent in the great scheme of things, as you'll see later.

The Scorpius and Octavia scene served two purposes, really. The first was just so that readers wouldn't forget about them. They're fairly important to the story, especially Octavia. The second was to add a bit of levity. I'm glad you liked them.

Everything that happens in the last scene was just a blast to write. It's funny, I went into it with this picture in my head of Kline and his team getting chased out of the house by Harry's defenses. It was this huge spectacle, replete with noises and fire and crazy things happening all over the place. But in the end, I didn't enjoy writing that nearly as much as the awkward dinner scene. About halfway through the process of writing it, I went back and changed the PoV from Hermione to Ron and it was one of the best decisions I ever made.

Did Harry cheat on Ginny? Sort of. The circumstances were... well, unique. This gets explored in a lot more detail 2 or 3 chapters down the road.

The pace definitely picks up from here on out. I'm really glad you're still enjoying the story. Thanks so much for sharing so much of your time and insight with me!


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Review #11, by shadowcat2 

29th April 2012:
I absolutely loved the way Ron got angry when he found what really happened between Esme and Harry. But Harry cheated? I had a feeling this happened while Ginny and Harry were on a break or something. Oh well. Although I don't like Esme her addition is definitely entertaining. And the vanishing with style thing sort of reminded me how Dumbledore once escaped when Ministry came to arrest him. Anyway, it's pretty late now. But i think i will read one more chapter before I go to sleep.

Author's Response: Ron is probably justified in being upset. Even though the events in question happened forty years ago, they certainly weren't Harry's proudest moment. I personally imagine that Harry and Ginny's path to the altar wasn't always smooth, and a cursory reading of the fan fic on the topic seems to agree with my thought. So given that Harry would have been sent on some long, lonely assignments as the Aurors tried to round up the remaining Death Eaters, I thought it was probably a very human thing to stray a bit.

I don't know that I even liked Esme to begin with, but she's grown on me. Perhaps you'll start to like her more as the story goes on.

I really enjoyed writing their escape. Dumbledore's escape from Fudge and Dawlish was definitely my main inspiration for this scene, although there were some others.

Thanks for reading and reviewing!


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Review #12, by agenth 

29th April 2012:
Hey I was rereading a few chapters,
and I have 2 questions:

1) why does Ron feel guilty about Ginny's death? He wasn't present, was he? I thought only Octavia was?

2) I thought Harry and Esme only kissed,
but in a later chapter Esme implies that they had sex, so which one is it? :D
And I guess Harry never told Ginny about Esme?

Author's Response: I'll do the best that I can.

Ron feels immensely guilty about Ginny's death. He's her older brother, by one year. The two of them grew up together, and he's always been the one to step up and try to protect her. More over, he's an Auror. He feels a duty to protect everyone. His feelings of guilt are different from Harry's, but no less real.

I deliberately left the extent of Harry and Esme's physical relationship vague. You could read a lot into what's said in this chapter or just a little. It's really up to what you want to believe, but it is apparent that it went beyond just kissing. And, no, Harry never told Ginny about Esme. He never told anybody before the night in his study when he, Ron and Hermione were trying to decide what to do with Percy's memory.

Thanks for the questions. If you have more, you're always welcome to post them in my Meet the Author thread!


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Review #13, by Elenia 

25th April 2012:
Almost 9000 words?! Wow! Although it didn't feel like it at all! I could've kept reading easily!

But boy was there a lot going on in this chapter! Hopefully I'll remember all I want to say!

Okay, let's start with the first scene. Interesting news from Hogwarts! That's one of the things I'm most anxious to find out. How does it fit with the main plot? Also, you made me suspicious about this Professor Astor. I don't know, it was just disregarded so easily so it made me wonder. Oh well, I'll just have to wait and see (:

Then onto meeting Esme. That was a funny scene. Both her and Harry are quite stubborn for not getting over something that happened so many years ago (x anyways, loved all the dialogue in that scene, it was amusing to read. One thing bothered me a bit though. I would've wanted to know a bit more about Esme's appearance. We learned that she's petite, blonde and has hazel eyes, but that's it. You always describe everything so well, so I would've wanted to know a bit more about her. Like did Harry think she had changed a lot from the way she looked when he had seen her before. That sort of things.

The scene with the pensieve was also excellent! Loved how you managed to guide us through it without repeating the whole thing. That was really good! Also loved the little details about the way Esme worked with the memory, that was all really clever. Also, loved their discussion after Ron left, it was brilliant.

The scene with the Malfoys reminded me of Octavia again and I became even more interested in her character. Somehow she will end up mixed in all this, won't she? Oh, and she was there when Ginny died, wasn't she? Or do I remember it completely wrong?

Loved the poem! Again, clever way of moving that part of the story forwards. The whole scene was done really well, and I think you've done an excellent job on Hermione's character!

Haha, the discussion over dinner was brilliant! Their reactions were just perfect, especially Ron's! His sister may be dead, and all this happened years and years ago, but he will still stand up for her anytime! Well done! And ooh! Harry's been a bad boy! You really need to tell us more what really happened between them! I can't believe Harry would cheat on Ginny! Oh, and Hermys! It was brilliant how he resolved the fight!

And then all the action started! Was not expecting that! It was amazing, the way you described it all. I practically bit my nails because of all the excitement! One of the best scenes of this story, I really, really loved it!

And then again with Hermys! He's adorable and I hope we get to see more of him! Ooh, I bet he will help to solve things in Hogwarts!

This is my new favourite chapter!

Take care!

~E

Author's Response: Hi, there!

Yes, the length on this chapter was kind of brutal. I thought a lot about breaking it up into two chapters, but I couldn't think of a logical way to do it.

Hogwarts always seems to be central to any canon story, doesn't it? The significance becomes apparent near the end of the story, but suffice it to say that something very important will happen there.

Esme is a firecracker. I thought about going into more detail on her appearance, but the chapter was already so long that some things had to be sacrificed, unfortunately. Maybe when I edit this some more.

I love memory magic. It's such a fascinating aspect of the books. So I've tried to play it up as much as I can. It seems like such a great tool to have at your disposal, especially for Aurors.

You are correct. Octavia was present when Ginny died. The significance of this fact... well, let's just say it's significant. Any more and I'd be giving too much away.

The poem got this chapter rejected the first time though because I forgot to note it as original work. So it was part of an overall painful learning experience. That said, I really like it and I'm glad you did, too.

The dinner discussion was so much fun to write. Ron is such an amazing character when he gets a head of steam going on a subject. I'm really glad you enjoyed it. And Hermys is awesome to have around for moments exactly like this.

The fight scene was one that I was really concerned about, so I'm really happy that you liked it. I had this very different picture in my head when I first began to write. Harry's house was almost coming alive with all of these different spells going off all over the place. The end product wound up being kind of spartan compared to my original thoughts.

Your review made my day. This chapter really begins the downhill run into the big ending. Thanks for reading and reviewing!


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Review #14, by ginerva_molly_weasley 

25th February 2012:
Right, first of all, I decided I wanted to review this chpater even though it was over 8,000 words because I do love the story so much!

I like the whole pace and flow of this chapter because whilst there is a lot of action, a lot of tension and rather a lot of word abuse in this chapter it seemed to have all the elements in it which it needed to make it a good chapter!

The whole meeting with Bill about the enchantments was very interesting as it showed that something sinister was going on inside Hogwarts by one of the staff or pupils. It showed that someone had gained enough power to make sure that Hogwarts was no longer safe and secure. Also the idea of diverting the spells was genius. It made the section more believable and showed how good Bill was at his job because he hadn't alerted anyone to the fact that anyone was aware of the fact that people had found the enchantments giving them more time to try and act against them.

The meeting with Esme was boardering on hilarity mainly because of the tension and awkwardness especially when she mentioned Ginny. It then became obvious that she had once liked Harry quite a lot by the phrase 'Stole 'arry's 'art' which I quite liked, although I am surprised how well Harry did manage to handle it and also by the fact Ron didn't react worse than he did!

The confirmation that the memory was a fake gave a whole different element to the story as even though we already knew that it was a fake, the confirmation showed that Percy had lived with so much guilt although it wasn't needed. I also liked the idea of going through the people who were capable of it as it gave suspects to the investigation so they had more to go on. BY implanting the idea in the aurors minds that it was created by a girl who had left the auror programme gave an air of authenticity to it but also an idea of who Lady Tenebra was.

The story with Scorpius and Octavia was a nice break with the angst situation set before. It was a nice change to see that wizarding children or adults for that matter were not always in control of their magic but also the idea of Harry having to cover it up was humourous as it was something that was beliavable and he would have gone through the situation himself so he'd have known how much easier the situation when he'd been found on the rooves would have been if someone was there to cover it up.

I liked the idea of inviting Ron and Hermione to the dinner with Esme as in a way you could sense that something was going to go wrong when they were there so it was nice to try and speculate what it would be. Then when the action unravelled I was like okay Wow I was not expecting that.

It was interesting to see a side of Harry which had cheated on Ginny. I had never imagined him to do that but the way it was said was perfectly believable especially as he defended his actions by saying the conditions they were in. The crude references were also subtly referred to which I really liked because they weren't said blatently (even though that may be in violation of TOS- I will have to review the rules soon!)

Ron's reaction to the information was very well written as was Hermione's because obviously no one had thought Harry was capable of cheating on Ginny particularly because they'd been so happy once upon a time before she'd died. No-one had probably even contemplated the idea of anything happening.

I also liked the idea of the interuption of the hit wizards (btw i LOVE the name hit wizards!). It was inevitable that it was going to happen at some point and because of the foreshadowing you had done in the previous chapters it wasn't hard to see what they were going to get arrested for. I also love the way you had made Harry so prepared for this interuption and the others knew the protocal if someone was to interput. It was very believeable and I just think it was simply so well written.

Hermys was just the cutest character ever in this, I must admit!

Author's Response: Hello, again!

Goodness, where to begin... First off, thanks for waiving your 8,000 word rule. I really thought about breaking this chapter up into two, but it all fit together so well that I couldn't figure out how to do it. It was a marathon to write, and I don't plan on having any more this long.

The monitoring spells inside Hogwarts are indicative of the central role that the school will always play in any attempt to control wizarding Britain. It's at the heart of the entire society, the one thing that all qualified British witches and wizards have in common. At least that's how I see it.

Harry has become more mature in many ways than the character we remember from the books. He doesn't automatically take the bait every time somebody provokes him. But Esme does know how to push buttons. She is also very, very good at what she does, as you can tell from how she figures out the memory. And, yes, poor Percy is carrying a lot of guilt for a crime he did not commit. Soon, we'll find out why...

You nailed it with Scorpius and Octavia: just something to lighten the mood a bit in an otherwise very heavy chapter. I also wanted to make sure that readers didn't forget that they exist, along with Draco and Astoria. We hadn't heard from them in a while.

I'm not sure that Harry **cheated** on Ginny so much as he just strayed a bit. I guess it depends on where you draw your personal boundaries. Regardless, Esme has a very legitimate reason to be angry with Harry, and we'll learn more about that in the chapters to come.

And Ron, oh, Ron. When I first started writing this, I have to admit that I was very intimidated by the prospect of trying to write in Ron's voice. He doesn't have the strong personality of a Harry or a Hermione, so it's tough to make him sound just right. But I've really come to enjoy it. He's so straightforward and down to earth and just a bit goofy. It's fun.

Hit Wizards actually come from Canon. In PoA, it was a squad of Hit Wizards who arrested Sirius Black after he was framed by Peter Pettigrew. And yes, Harry was very well prepared for them. His general paranoia will be explored a fair bit over the next few chapters.

Glad you like Hermys. His role in the story is also not over.

Thanks so much for such a long and detailed review!


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Review #15, by Remus 

6th February 2012:
Hello! About time I showed up, no?

This will be one of those reviews that I'll be reading along and reviewing at the same time.

I have NO idea if this has been pointed out but in the part where Bill says: ď'Iíve spent fifty years working with protective enchantments,Ē Bill answered gravely. ďand the spells...'" I guess you forgot to capitalize 'And'. Things happen.

Esme's first line, I absolutely loved it. I also enjoyed Harry's nervousness about meeting an old fling. Glad that you had Harry explore other 'options' before marrying Ginny because it feels more realistic that way. She definitely sounds bitter towards Harry and hope to find out why exactly. 'Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned'. That entire conversation between Harry, Ron and Esme was fantastic, however, the one person I felt bad about was the Customs officer. Poor guy was in such an awkward position.

When Harry is explaining about the people who were his family he stated that his only family were three muggles who hated him. In the end, though, it was only two as Dudley grew up and didn't see Harry as a waste of space.

I'm glad to see Scorpius again! The reaction he had about his daughter was being bullied hit me close to home considering how my own father would get mad the same way (minus setting his pants on fire part) at the boys who would teas me and call me names. Octavia asking for candy is such a grandchild thing to ask, made me giggle. I love the characterizations you give everyone. For example Octavia's reactions to being bullied and her affections towards her grandparents feel very real by just the way you've written her.

I find it intriguing how you wrote how they had never disclosed (save for a few people) about Voldemort and his Horcruxes and the Elder Wand. It's true though, however, shouldn't the information be released to not let history be repeated? Perhaps through Harry's memoir? The poem was very neat. You definitely have a way with words.

Ron, oh Ron. Yeah, I can totally see him getting mad at the fact that there could be another woman in Harry's life. Kudos points for you for acknowledging that a woman will try to befriend a guy's friend in order to get in his good graces. The dinner scene was great, definitely made me chuckle...until the Ministry people came.

Can they be tried again? Wouldn't double jeopardy come into play? Then again the Blood Order seems to be very...powerful and would do anything to stop Harry and co. One thing though, wouldn't the portraits of his family say something instead of wave and smile? Specially Lily who would at least tell Harry to be careful.

Hermy's last section was absolutely cute. Nice ending and a great fast paced chapter! I have to go workout now and then eat so I hope I get to read the next chapter tonight!

--Perelandra

Author's Response: Hello, again! Always nice to see you back. No rush. Your reviews are worth the wait.

Yeah, that bit of Bill's dialog is a typo I need to fix. It's meant to be a comma, not a full stop.

Esme's quite a pistol, no? Harry has good reason to be nervous. As the next few chapters unfold, we'll get to see a lot more of Harry and Esme's story. And, yes, the poor guy from customs probably regrets coming in to work on that day.

I guess you have a good point vis-a-vis Dudley. Different fics have portrayed Harry's future relationship with him differently. I've sort of left it blank. Harry is an old man explaining himself in this situation, so I'll let him have his moment of angst.

Boys used to tease you and call you names? I think my wand just set my pants on fire! Seriously, though, I can relate. I was a very nerdy kid. Got picked on a lot. I didn't really hit my stride socially until college. You know what they say, though: the best revenge is to live well! And Octavia will certainly get there someday.

I've always thought that Dumbledore only shared the secret of the horcruxes and the Elder Wand with the trio for a very good reason. If those secrets - and the power of the Elder Wand - were to die with them then Dumbledore believed that they would be gone forever. Naive? Perhaps. It wouldn't be the first time he was misguided about something. But that was his plan and I believe that the trio all feel like it's a good one. At least in my world, they do.

The dinner scene was a blast to write. Once I figure out the right way to introduce Ron and Hermione to the scene, it just rolled off of my fingertips. As far as double jeopardy, it turns out that even ordinary British allows prosecutors quite a bit more leeway to retry a defendant than U.S. law. I believe the standard is "material, new evidence." Combine that with the fact that every wizarding trial in the books is portrayed as basically a drumhead and I didn't find it to be too much of a stretch.

Thank you so much for the review and especially for all the ideas and reactions. You have no idea how valuable this kind of feedback is. It gives me a really good feeling for what I'm doing well and what I could do better. I hope you had a good workout!


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Review #16, by Beeezie 

3rd February 2012:
Hey, this is Beeezie, finally here with your review. :) (Sorry it's been way too long - life has been stressful and busy, and I need to stop it with the graphic making already. Though on the bright side, I'm getting decent ish.)

Anyway.

First section (Harry)

A few mechanical points:

Third paragraph: "and the spells that protect the castle" should start with a capital letter, since you finished the previous sentence.

Sixth paragraph: Neville's face stared toward it's missing feet. There are two problems I have with this sentence. First, while I understand what you were trying to do, I felt like talking about Neville's face rather than Neville himself was a bit awkward, especially once you started talking about his face's feet. Second, "it's" should be "its" - "it's" should only be used in place of "it is."

The paragraph starting "Thank you, Ron" and "Look, Esme, let's keep this professional" are only a few paragraphs apart, and you use "interjected" in both. Not a huge deal, but it felt a bit awkward.

The paragraph starting, "That does not sound like the wizard" - shouldn't it be 'imself, not 'isself?

Those aside:

I really enjoyed your bringing those quotes from the movie into the story. It was a nice little touch, and added a bit of levity to the scene. My only comment is that I would have liked to see a little more detail about how they were saying it, especially from Neville - as it is, I have no idea how the lines were delivered. I assumed that Neville was a bit sarcastic, but I wanted to see you spell it out more. Does that make sense?

I thought that you thought out Bill's reaction to the monitoring spells really well. The kneejerk reaction is always going to be, get rid of them, and I was glad to see you introduce the ambiguity and caution that they have to use. In particular, I liked the detail about how it might be mistaken for the castle's magical protections - that was a terrific touch.

I did feel like the question of Professor Astor was dropped a bit too quickly, however; Harry in particular has got to be feeling so paranoid and suspicious of everyone right now, and I'm not sure that he'd accept it that easily. Perhaps he wouldn't challenge Neville, but I'd expect him to worry about it a bit more rather than just accept it - especially since being a half-blood doesn't necessarily mean that you're not a dark wizard. Look at Voldemort.

I also felt like the scene with Esme started out feeling a little... I don't want to say disingenuous, because that's not quite right, but it just didn't feel like they were the adults that they actually are. I mean, god, after fifty years, you'd expect them both to move on, you know? I thought that Esme herself was actually fine, on the whole, because I could understand why she felt irritated and resentful of his bringing her there. Harry, on the other hand... ugh, I'm having a hard time putting my finger on it. There's just something in the lead-up and the initial exchange that felt a bit off to me.

That said, it really was just the beginning - once Esme starts in on Ron, and especially once she learns that Ginny has died, the scene really fell into place and began to feel much more natural (including Harry's jinxing Ron - that was perfect). The memory in particular was done very, very well - you didn't walk us through the entire thing again, but you managed to convey in a very small amount of space just how much more she knows than they do, and it felt completely plausible (which I was also a tiny bit worried about).

My other major comment about this section - and I touched on it before, I think - was that I wanted to see a little more about what Harry was thinking and how he was feeling, particularly about Esme and Ginny. Toward the end, when he and Esme start really talking, I saw more of that, but before that, it felt a little lacking. It didn't even feel like Harry was just blocking the feelings out, which would have worked well. They just felt absent. Does that make sense?

However, on the whole, this section was great, and I'm really excited to see what you do with Esme and what she knows about this entire thing! (You're going to motivate me to get all my review requests done a lot quicker so I can get to the next chapter, haha.)


Second section (Scorpius)
So when I write reviews, I jot down notes to myself as I read and then later compile them into something more coherent than a jumbled mess of words. However, when I looked at my notes for this section, I had literally written nothing down.

That sounds like it could be a bad thing - like, "oh, so boring, I couldn't find anything to say" - but I don't mean it that way at all. This was just a really terrific section. It was relevant to the story as a whole, you spent an appropriate amount of time on it, and your characterisation was spot on. Octavia really intrigues me, and I wonder how you're going to continue to develop her as a character. I know that she's just a kid, but part of me feels like you've been alluding to her being a bit more important than the other next-next gen kids. Maybe I'm just imagining it, though.

Really excellent job here, and I'm sorry that my comments on the section are so underwhelming.


Third section (Hermione)
Short, sweet, and to the point. This was perfect. Again, literally no issues with it.

Hermione's character here feels spot on - proactive, productive, and thorough. One of my favourite things about the chapter as a whole was where she found the answer - you did an amazing job of depicting the potential fallout from a dark wizard's reign in finding information about them, and poems and stories are exactly where it's likely to sneak through.

Author's Response: Oh, how I love waking up to find one of your reviews waiting for me! It's like Xmas morning.

Thanks for all of the grammar/typo fixes. The queue just stays so backed up these days that I hate to waste the validators' time on edits. Some day, I'll come back and fix all of this stuff, I swear...

A lot of your comments revolve around additional topics you would have liked to see explored, and I can relate to nearly all of them. This chapter just wound up being so-o-o-o lo-o-o-o-o-ng. If I had it to do over, I very well might have split it in two, because it really does cover a lot of ground. In order to keep it one chapter, I made quite a few cuts along the way.

Harry has some very good reasons to feel very uneasy about Esme. Some of those get explored in future chapters. I can understand how his reaction seems a bit odd and out of character in this one. Again, his feelings about her are something that I didn't make room to explore here, so I've tried to fill it in later on. I think (hope) that you'll get your desired fix of Harry's inner thoughts on Esme and Ginny over the next three chapters.

The section with Scorpius and Octavia, to be completely honest, was mostly just fluff. I love both characters and I felt like it had been a long time since we'd seen Draco and Astoria, so I wanted to wedge them in here. And it was a lot of fun to write. If I were to say that it had any real purpose, it would be to add some levity to an otherwise serious chapter.

I'm really glad you liked Hermione's solo section. That poem caused me so much grief because I didn't realize I had to A/N it as original work when I first submitted it. Good news/bad news: the validator apparently thought it was good enough to be something that I'd quoted from a published source, but it still got the chapter rejected. :-/

On to part two...



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Review #17, by Ashling586 

28th January 2012:
Another wonderful chapter. I did notice one grammar issue towards the beginning of the chapter. Since there is a period after Bill says gravely then the And in the dialogue should be capitalized. Other than that I didn't notice any other grammar problems. I felt that the flow was great and I really liked the different point of views through out the chapter. I thought that Octavia impersonating the boy she hexed was funny and the dinner scene was hilarious. The wall of flames reminded me of how Dumbledore escaped his office in the fifth book. I thought all the bobby traps in the house was pretty cool.
I thought that you did a really good job on the poem portion as well. I have written poetry in the past and understand how much work it takes to make sure that it rhymes and flows well.

Author's Response: Hi, there!

I'll take a look at the typo. I probably meant to put a comma instead of a full stop. Thanks for pointing that out.

I tried to put a lot of levity into this chapter, since the overarching plot developments were all very dark and unpleasant. The dinner scene was a lot of fun to write, and the section with Scorpius and Octavia was almost pure fluff, but I enjoyed it immensely. She's so cute it's sick.

The scene with Dumbledore escaping from Fudge and the Aurors in OoTP was obviously my big inspiration for that whole event. I'm glad you thought of it. And the poem... oh, the poem. It was very hard to write, then it got the whole chapter rejected because I didn't note that it was my own original work so the validator thought I was breaking the 3 line rule. I just hope it's worth it in the long run, because it caused me no end of difficulty.

Thanks again for reading and reviewing!


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Review #18, by dirtydeedsdonedirtcheap 

10th January 2012:
I was not planning on reading this in one sitting, let me tell you that. This chapter was so good, I forgot I had something in the microwave and everything in it just literally melted. So much happened! Sorry for the late review, I'm taking an two week intensive design class and it's hours everyday, so it's been hard to really catch up with all my reviews!

So, first I have to point this out:

"Well, Harry was always pretty thick where women were concerned," Hermione said. The way she smiled at him gave Ron the distinct impression that Harry might not have been the only one she found to be a bit thick.

Starting from the moment Ron and Harry went to meet Esme, well, that was just pure comedy. I found myself laughing at her rudeness. I could really hear her voice in my head as well, it was all thanks to the way you wrote out her speech, I felt very posh reading about her.

Of course I have to give it up to my man Hermys. The best house elf next to Dobby. Defense plan Chinese Fireball? Well, Harry really keeps his house under lock, doesn't he? He sounds so paranoid and I love it because I'm convinced that Harry would have been paranoid after the war and even years later when he really accepted what happened and not moved but make the transition in his life where he could say 'It happened, it was a bad time but I'm happy now.'

And my heart swelled for Octavia. I can't stand bullies and the topic of kids picking on other kids has what I've been watching on the news all week. It's just a story but I really wished I could have reached through my computer screen and hug her as she revealed what was going on in muggle school to Scorpius. She really is a spitfire though, needs to control herself. Draco was a nice addition to the chapter as well, he didn't seem out of character, still himself but a much wiser version of himself.

I'm not sure if this is another war though, I really don't feel like it is. Everything that is happening, I feel like it's kind of a 'cold war' still, even though people have been attacked. I'm guessing there's going to be a tragedy of somesort that really makes things escalate into a full fledged war between the divisions in the magical community, most notably against Harry. Can he save everyone again? I'm not sure and just because he's older, that doesn't mean he's wiser. I feel like Hermione and Ron would follow him without any questions but I'm not sure if that's a good thing and I don't trust Esme either because she seems like the type to turn on Harry because he rejected her all those years ago and blew up at her today.

Harry was quite the randy man, wasn't he?

Another excellent chapter, everything is getting so exciting! I really thought that passage was written by someone else and I was pleasantly surprised that it was your original work. This story could really be worked into original fiction, it would make a good movie! That's all I'm going to say.

Happy New Year and congrats on 100,000!

Author's Response: Hey, it's my favorite marathon reviewer! Nice to see you back again. I hope your class is going well. I still feel bad about disrupting your studies the first time around.

OK, I must be really dense or something. Is there some spelling or grammatical error in the passage you quoted that I just can't see. I had some issues getting this chapter through validation, so I stared at every line of it much longer than normal. I think I'm blind to mistakes at this point. Please PM me if there's something I'm missing.

Esme has been fun to write so far. She can be very serious, but she can also add some levity. She also gives me the possibility -- and I haven't really decided what to do with it yet -- of a love interest for poor, grief-stricken Harry. Her speech originally had a smattering of French exclamations and insults, but I didn't feel like translating them all in the A/N, so they had to go.

Hermys is, as he would say, a good elf. And, yes, Harry had been anticipating this day for a long time, hence the house's profound ability to defend itself.

I had been looking for a good chance to bring Octavia back, and I have to say I'm quite pleased with how that section turned out. Getting her and Draco together in the same place was also good, as it sets the stage for things to come.

There definitely is not a war... yet. But the bad tides are rising. Ron and Hermione will, of course, be there for him. Esme, well, she's still an unknown quantity.

And, yes, Harry was a bit of a horndog in his carefree, younger years. Who knew?

Thank you so much for sticking with the story. I enjoy all of your reviews thoroughly! If they ever make a movie out of this -- and let's just say that I haven't bothered to retain an agent or anything -- I will make sure you get a part.


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Review #19, by Roots in Water 

8th January 2012:
It's Roots in Water here with your review!

I really enjoyed reading this chapter. Things really do seem to be picking up in the Wizarding world!

I think that you did a great job with Esme. The little changes you made to her speech patterns to show that her native language is not English were subtle enough that they didn't interfere with the reading of the chapter at all. As well, I liked the way you had her insulting Harry right off the bat- you truly did depict her as a "woman scorned". The way she changed, however, after she learned that Ginny was dead, showed that she wasn't overly mean or insensitive, just hurt by Harry's actions.

The argument that erupted before the dinner was served was quite amusing to read because everyone seemed to want to get involved in it. While Harry and Esme were fighting about sunsets and the placement of their body parts, Ron was getting enraged about Harry's infidelity to his sister and Hermione was in danger of swallowing her napkin (I loved that line). I just loved the way everything built up and up until Hermys had to take their wands away.

As well, I liked how you have built the plot because now the readers know that they are once again being arrested for the murder of Edwin because of something Lady Tenebra had set in motion a few chapters ago. It makes it exciting (and occasionally frustrating/difficult) to know things long before the other characters.

The defense mechanisms of the house were well done and quite amusing to read. They were quite clever because they allowed Harry and co to escape to another room while making it look like they had left the country. The aurors that had come to arrest them would have been so fed up by the house itself that they wouldn't take the chance to look elsewhere, allowing Harry the necessary time to collect his things before leaving. And now they're on the run... I wonder what they will accomplish while they're out there and where they will hide. I don't they will be staying in tents in forests again.

A quick thing: with "itís missing feet", did you mean "his missing feet"?

All in all, I think that you did a great job with this chapter. It was very interesting and intriguing and it makes me look forward to the next chapter. Thanks for re-requesting and I hope my comments were helpful! Congratulations on reaching 100 000 words!

Author's Response: Hello, again!

Just to get your quick thing out of the way, I *think* the way it's worded is correct, because Neville's face is the subject of the sentence, not Neville. I agree that it reads a bit awkward, though. Maybe I'll revise that.

Esme went through a few revisions to get her just right. My first draft wasn't angry enough, so my beta reader sent me back to the drawing board. She's great that way. She is definitely a woman scorned, although we'll soon discover that she's not entirely without fault in the situation.

The argument over dinner was a lot of fun to write. I'm glad you enjoyed it. I'm also really glad you liked Harry's home defenses. I had this image in my head of that part being this gigantic cacophony of crazy magic and it turned out rather flat by that standard. But I couldn't figure out how to make it any crazier, so that's how it turned out.

You'll soon see where they all wind up. It's a place I promise you'll recognize.

100,000 words... Doesn't seem possible. Your comments are always helpful! Thanks so much for continuing to read and review!


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Review #20, by CloakAuror9 

6th January 2012:
Loving this story more and more by the minute!

As I read your story I felt like I was reading the Deathly Hallows again, only had more new information into it. It's just so realistic that I had too keep reminding myself that this was not Deathly Hallows as I read it.

Something I really like about you and your story is that the way its canon. I like fanfictions that are canon, and I think that plays a big part on your story because imagine if you disregarded DH and just went with this story...it's unimaginable.

The plot by itself is very complex and I am utterly amazed by each chapter that gets published. Now, don't get me wrong or anything but sometimes you will have doubts about this story. I had them for the first few chapters, I kept thinking 'How is he going to mange to pull this off?' and other doubtful thoughts that you would be shocked if you knew but let's keep things smooth on my review. But that all came to pass soon enough and I am now very definite that this story will end with something interesting.

This chapter was rather long but I loved it. Hermys disapparating to Hogwarts was a hot and cold topic for me. I love the idea of him bringing food and other things the next next 'Wotter' Generation but I thought you can't apparate to and from Hogwarts unless you're headmaster? This is the only 'issue' I have against this chapter but other than that everything went perfect.

Esme and Harry's 'relationship' I found quiet funny! The dialogue and how it went was really rather amusing and I don't know if we're supposed to take the dinner scene seriously or not but I didn't so is that a crime? I do feel quite sorry for Esme since she got 'rejected' by Harry but can you really expect that he loved someone else other than Ginny? I think not.

The characterisation is going fantastic as well, I don't really know how this chapter improved their already deep characterisation but I guess something did happen.

The scene with Kline was pretty much a killer-joy thing for me since everything was so amusing and all and then suddenly it's not amusing any more. And there's Rose, Scorpius, Octavia, Draco, Astoria! Do I really have to say how amazing you are for including them in this story and not just putting them on the background?

Overall, I cut this review short since I really don't want you to be reading this essay review for you story. I think you did a great job on this chapter and I thought Hermys was rather adorable, weirdly enough.

Sorry for the lengthy review,
CloakAuror9 xx

Author's Response: Sorry? I love long reviews! By the way, this happened to be the 200th review for Conspiracy of Blood, so thank you for being part of this special occasion!

The comments about Deathly Hallows... wow, that's high praise. I'm not sure I feel worthy of if, but I'm pleased as can be that you feel that way.

I was always under the impression that House Elves could pretty much apparate and disapparate anywhere. For instance, Dobby is able to apparate into Malfoy Manor in spite of its wards. I haven't read anything that suggests that Hogwarts is different in this regard. If it really troubles you, let's just imagine that he apparated to whatever service entrance the elves use and then walked inside. ;-)

Esme and Harry have a troubled past. At one point, she had fallen for him, and in a time of loneliness and isolation, he led her on quite a bit. He's not proud of what he did, hence his discomfort around her, but at the same time he's sure that he made the right choice by staying with Ginny.

This whole chapter felt really grim, so I added the scene with the Malfoys at the last moment. I really needed to bring them back into the plot flow, anyway, and this seemed like a good way to do it.

As I said, I love long reviews, so don't ever feel like you have to cut yourself off on my account. I'll read as much or as little as you have to say!

Thanks so much for reading and reviewing!


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