Our website is made possible by displaying online advertisements to our visitors.
Please consider supporting us by disabling your ad blocker.





  
24 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Camille 

24th June 2012:
Good chapter. I don't think Rose has it in her to kill
someone. I'm really enjoying this story.

 Report Review

Review #2, by MorganAsh 

28th May 2012:
Bellatrix was Tonks' aunt not cousin. and Narcissa was also Tonks' aunt who married Lucius. sorry pet peeve when people write these and then get things like relationships and spellings wrong thought you would like it to be fixed if you were wrong i know i would. so far so good though the story is pretty good.

 Report Review

Review #3, by Renfair 

20th April 2012:
Well, good for Teddy teaching himself how to cook. I'm not surprised at all, Mr. Lupin. Personally, my husband cooks *much* better than I do (mostly because I lack practice because why bother when someone else who enjoys it will do it for you?) Cooking seems like one of those few things that Muggles might do better. Sure you can wave your wand and have a bunch of ingredients cook themselves, but cooking is also an art so if you don't put hard work into it, it won't be the same. I'm just a bit hesitant here because sure Teddy can cook...but can *Scorpius* cook?? And would he know Rose's favorite meal?? Perhaps Teddy is taking too much of a risk here in his desire to get Rose out of her room. Girls notice things like if a guy can cook or not. We'll see how it turns out... keep reading, right?

Or maybe she'll just take the food to her room like I would have done ;)

"Why is it that wizards are so against using muggle technology? "--THIS! I mean, I know we have the whole "magic messes with the electronics" thing...but wouldn't an encrypted e-mail have been a much safer way for the Order to pass info back and forth than owls when Voldemort came back to life?

"They had snogged but they still hated each other? Why was that?"-- Er, because they were teenagers? Isn't that just sort of what teenagers do? *mature, adult eye roll*

I'm glad you had the Malfoys go good. In canon, Lucius and Narcissa seemed like two people who thought they were better than everyone else and got themselves mixed up in some stupid stuff because they were young. Then they found out it doesn't matter how rich you are, Voldemort's still going to kill you if you try to back out. I would think having a baby would make them also very regretful of the choices they made, but then still had to live with them later when Voldemort returned. I would hope that in later years they would attempt to do some sort of penance and put the whole thing behind them. So it's nice to see you didn't keep them being all cliche evil just for the heck of it.

So Rose is turning out to be a hard nut to crack. That's realistic at least. Teddy's going to have go digging a little deeper in his detective tool bag and pull out something a bit better than a spatula.

 Report Review

Review #4, by A Phoenix Means Hope 

14th April 2012:
Muggle devices don't work around wizards because of magical interference

 Report Review

Review #5, by Teddylover 

4th March 2012:
Wow but they have made out! I wasn't expecting that. I guess that can explain part of the tension. Good chapter. I can't wait to see who did the killing. And what will happen. I can already see them getting together. I love your chapter images too by the way.

 Report Review

Review #6, by AC_rules 

2nd March 2012:
Hellloo! So, first off I'm a horrid person who takes forever with reviews. Appologise about that, I had a set weekened when I was planning to really go to town on a reviewing front here, but then this stuff came up and I ended up with about twenty minutes free time - which wasn't enough. So I'm really sorry this has taken forever! I was really excited to come continue reading this and it's definately been awhile.

I really enjoyed this chapter (not that that's suprising) but it definately hilighted the fact to me that this is a very very bad plan. Teddy has no idea what he's doing and I'm sure at some point he's going to muck things up big time.

Plus, I really don't know what's going to happen and I'm really intrigued. Anyway, this was another fab chapter - I love your characterisation of Rose and this fabulously insane plot (and I mean that in a good ohhh-my-gosh-what's-up-next sort of way)

AC

 Report Review

Review #7, by notreallyblonde44 

26th February 2012:
Hello Drue!

It's been far too long on my end, and I apologize for that, however I am finally here to give you one of the reviews I plan to give this story. We were paired together on TGS ages ago, and I wanted to fulfill my end of things. I'm dreadfully sorry for the delay and hope you can forgive me! *cookies?*

Anywho, I've gotten this far and figured it was high time to leave a review for the first few chapters. I think you have a strong narrative presence here with Teddy. His quirks are interesting, and sometimes funny and silly, even though he plays such a serious role in a serious case. A murder is no joke, yet you manage an element of comedic relief that is both necessary and in-character for Teddy. Which I applaud you for. This is a hard thing to do.

Overall, the story is very creative in terms of plot. I've seen a few "who dunnit" types and Minister murders afoot on HPFF, but nothing to this degree and extent. Choosing Rose, Scorpius, and Teddy definitely was the perfect choice for the leading roles. I'm curious to learn more about Rose/Scorpius history as well as see Rose/Teddy's future. Should be a very dynamic turn of events on the way. You set up the reader nicely for plot twists and a lot of mystery. Nice genre play here. Also, I don't trust Rose worth a lick. I want to see how her role plays out; should be a shocker on all accounts.

So, yeah, wonder where this is all going :) Thanks for sharing your fic with us!

--Ellie

 Report Review

Review #8, by Lillylover22 

17th January 2012:
This would be so confusing for teddy 9/10 : )

 Report Review

Review #9, by apocalypse 

5th November 2011:
Hey! This is apocalypse, here with your review!

First of all, I love how you've pulled off the first person idea with Teddy. Once again, good job on that! =)

Moving on the chapter, your paragraphs are linked very nicely. The were consistent and had the right balance.

The star-gazing and making dinner struck me as so mot Malfoy-ish. But then, it was also a plus point for you story as it shows how Ted can't help but be himself and be there for Rose as her big brother, or so he believes =P

Also, as it'from Teddy's point of view, I can't help but feel confused about the real Rose. Her image just seem to fit in my mind. The way she acts is different and the way he views her is totally on another scale so for second there, it was messing with my brain. I hope her character gets clearer as we move ahead. And I can't believe that Scorp and Rose actually snogged. How could she? =P

Then, the part where he describes her hair. Um, don't you think that's sort of unrealistic for a guy? Why would a guy notice so much that h actually sees whether her hair is frizzy or not? It just struck me as slightly odd and sort of out of character for Ted. On the other hand, this scene shows how much he actually notices her! And not only because it's his duty. He's already falling for her =P

Even though Rose's character was a bit foggy, I liked how she constantly forced him, albeit unconsciously, to remember that he's supposed to be acting like Malfoy and not Ted. She doesn't let him get carried away and be himself. I also like how she's not opening herself up to him. Not yet anyway. It's good that she recognizes her limits.

Overall a good chapter and really interesting read! =)

-Er, I feel really weird saying this but I've noticed that you haven't responded to my previous either. I just wanna request to do so as I want to know if I have been of any help or not =) hope you understand. =)

Author's Response: Thank you so much! That's some really helpful insight, and I will definitely take that into account!

You're right. There were a few things in this chapter that I guess I didn't look at too closely enough to make sure they were in Teddy's character!

Thank you so much for your help!

And yes, I'm sorry I haven't responded yet. I did see and thank you so much for it! I'm just so behind on my review responses. Thanks, and sorry!

But thank you so much for taking the time to tell me this. You were so helpful! :D


 Report Review

Review #10, by Cleopatraa 

22nd October 2011:
Review 3
Okay I noticed a mistake in this chapter. You wrote: ď"Yes," I admitted even though I was not a Malfoy. Only regrettably and distantly related by marriage. Yes, regrettably related by marriage. Don't judge.My mother was killed by her cousin, Bellatrix Lestrange, whose sister married a Malfoy. But Malfoys weren't as bad as most wizards made them out to be anymore. Yes, they had supported the wrong sort during the war, but they went good. They were and still are good.Ē

Well that is wrong Andromeda Black is the sister of Bellatrix Black and Narcissa Black. So his mom was killed by her aunt Bellatrix Black ( who married Rodolphus Lestrange so thatís why her last names is Lestrange) and Narcissa Black ( who married Malfoy thatís why her last name is Malfoy) is also Tonkís aunt so sheís the great aunt of Teddy and Tonks and Draco were first cousins so Scorpius and Teddy were I think third cousins ( so they arenít related by marriage but by blood even if itís distant

Otherwise nice chapter.

-Trick or Treat from Slytherin House

 Report Review

Review #11, by Raine 

14th October 2011:
Big surprise! So there is history? Hmmm interesting! I love the twists on this story. It's so original. I absolutely love it. And your chapter images are so cute! you have a good sense of humor. :) 100/100

 Report Review

Review #12, by Raequinn101 

6th October 2011:
Very nice, the way Teddy is struggling with his own thoughts and Malfoy's really add depth to the story! His conflict between that, and his fast learning, really gets him across and the reader can identify with him!

 Report Review

Review #13, by BellatrixLivesOn 

27th September 2011:
WAH! Surprise! Poor Rose. Its probably been awkward for her and Teddy had no idea. Lol that sucks. But I'm glad shes coming out of her room more and being more open.

Now they can have someone to talk to!

 Report Review

Review #14, by GodricGryffindor 

23rd September 2011:
That was a surprise. They've snogged? Was not expecting that. Good twist.

I'm glad we have a small background of their relationship now. I wonder when they will start to have feelings for each other. Clearly they will. And how mad she will be. Yikes. I'd hate to be on the receiving end of that.

I want more!

 Report Review

Review #15, by tangledconstellations 

18th September 2011:
Wow. So this case is actually 100 times more complicated now, hahaha! Oh Rose! Bad times :( This is going to get seriously awkward..!

I pretty much adored this chapter, because I could sense the awkwardness and the hesitation in everything that Teddy did and said. It was really unique, because characters are supposed to be vibrant and confident, but he is so out of his comfort zone. He is a rather fantastic actor though - I would never have been able to keep this up! I loved the way he skirts around every subject but then it kind of sounds effortless as well. I can't imagine what it'd be like to act to dumb and yet in the know, too. Its as though Rose is just accepting he's playing dumb to be difficult, to avoid the truth. Its a fantastic achievement on your account, for keeping this up so much! I would have got tangled and confused by now :P

I really liked the lovely imagery of Teddy looking up at the stars. It's very wistful. It kind of reminds you that he is in such a weird, really rather messed up position, and things like that are snippets of normality. And, with the dishes too...it was like they were a (strange) couple, you know, you do the dishes, I'll dry. Even though neither of them know really anything about the other. Kinda sad. When Rose joined Teddy on the grass it made me really feel bad for her, because she's a woman, y'know? She's out of comfort zone too and she probably needs support, despite being a fiery character, because everyone does. She's stuck with this guy who pretty much wanted to use her, and I really think she's got a secret tucked in her mind.

I really really liked this chapter because you're drawing the tension out all the more and I know there's going to be yet more revelations. This tension combined with Teddy's almost brotherly admiring instinct of Rose is beautiful and so complicated. It feels much deeper than your (fantastically witty) puns and lighthearted approach to Teddy.

Can't wait to read the next one! :D L xxx

 Report Review

Review #16, by SunSation Gal 07 

16th September 2011:
Ooh...alfredo.you're making me hungry Drue! :P And so they apparently kissed and he wanted to keep it up. Yeah, sounds like Malfoy. Hmm...what is Rose hiding? Though I know it will be a while before we find out since she's not that fond of Malfoy...

 Report Review

Review #17, by academica 

15th September 2011:
Hi! I'm here with your review :)

I love the little bit at the beginning about cooking. It reminds me a lot of Remus, at least the way I write him. It's so practical; any man who's going to live as a bachelor has to learn to make himself something half decent for dinner.

The interactions between Rose and Teddy (Scorpius) are really cute. You've portrayed Rose just as I usually envision her: skeptical, finicky, and proud. This is sort of picky for me to say, but the paragraph about Rose's frizzy hair just didn't quite flow correctly for me. I think you may have said the same thing several times in several different ways, that's all. I loved Teddy's little internal monologue about Rose kissing Scorpius, though. That was really amusing, and it was easy for me to visualize Teddy struggling to keep his cool there.

I liked the last part of this chapter, too. The scene seemed very idyllic, and the pacing of the relationship between Teddy and Rose was nice. It all seemed quite realistic. Also, I loved that little side note about the Malfoys. Teddy's such a nice guy :)

The chapter flowed well and was interesting from start to finish. You've still got a great, very original story here. As I alluded to earlier, you're continuing to do a great job with characterization with Teddy and Rose.

Nice work! Thanks for re-requesting. You can come back later on to request for chapter four if you like :)

Amanda

 Report Review

Review #18, by CambAngst 

13th September 2011:
"Confirmed Fact #1: Rose Weasley snogged Scorpius Malfoy in a broom cupboard."

This line is money. I love it.

Once again, I'm really enjoying where your story is going. It seems really difficult to me to put yourself into a character who's trying to put himself into another character, and I think you're doing a great job of it. I feel so badly for poor Rose. She has this terrible sword hanging over her head and her savior is inches away and she doesn't even know. I hope you can find a way to play that up more as the story unfolds. It's a great hook.

The only thing I wasn't so wild about was the section of Teddy's cooking. It just felt a bit awkward to me. It's one thing to engage the reader in that "yadda yadda yadda, don't you agree?" kind of way. When you take that to the level of "Please inform me and I will...", then I find it a little distracting. Maybe that's just me.

You've got something really good going here. I think work is going to intrude before I get to read chapter 4, but I'll definitely be on that soon.

 Report Review

Review #19, by Remus 

12th September 2011:
Hey its me again with the review! Glad you re-requested!

Once again, this is a great chapter. The ONLY thing that I can point out is the amount of short sentences you have when you can most likely merge several of them and get the same message across. For example "She made a plate and didn't sit at the table like I expected her to. She took it to her room and disappeared again." if you put those two together you can get something like "She made a plate and didn't sit at the table as I expected her to do and proceeded to take the food in her room." You'll just have a better flow rather than have many sentences.

Other than that, Teddy is awesome as this and perfect at playing Malfoy. I'm truly curious as to where you're going to take this!

--Perelandra

 Report Review

Review #20, by MajiKat 

6th September 2011:
Confirmed Fact #1: Rose Weasley snogged Scorpius Malfoy in a broom cupboard.

bahahahahahahaa excellent. i absolutely love that line!
i loved this chapter too - a little of rose is starting to unravel and teddy is amazing. i love his narrative voice more and more - you have such a strong command on him and i envy that. writing boys is always difficult. i'm rather jealous.

can't wait for an update. this is paced wonderfully by the way - not too rushed and not dragged out either. things are being revealed subtly and slowly and i like that.

Kate xx

 Report Review

Review #21, by Atomic 

4th September 2011:
Aww, this chapter is so touching. Poor Teddy just wants to talk to her and make her feel better but he can't because of his job. Poor bloke. You're doing such a wonderful job with the story, though. I especially love Rosie. She's definitely her mother's daughter.

You're doing a marvelous job with the plot too. It's all very interesting, especially with the broom cupboard twist. And you're not moving too fast at all. You've set a nice and steady pace and it's really going very well.

No critiques for you either! I'm loving this story! Can't wait for the next chapter!

 Report Review

Review #22, by Susan 

4th September 2011:
oh awesome chapter. When r u going to add next : D ? 10/10

 Report Review

Review #23, by Crescent Moon  

2nd September 2011:
Great story. I'm not really a fan of Rose/Ted stories, but the plot was too great to miss XD
I can't wait to see what's going to happen next so please continue as soon as you can.

 Report Review

Review #24, by DarkLadyofSlytherin 

1st September 2011:
Silly Rose. Eventually I'm sure she'll come out of her shell and talk to Teddy/Scorpius. I still feel bad for her, but seeing how stubborn she is in this chapter, not nearly as much as I had previously.

I think I feel worse for Teddy. In fact, I definitely do. He wants so badly to comfort his friend and can't because he's not allowed to be himself. He has to be Scorpius. Poor Teddy.

I can't wait to find out what Rose is hiding. Love it!

Author's Response: YAY! Thanks so much for the review, Len! I'm glad you're not feeling as bad for Rose anymore. That's good. :P

Thanks, hun!


 Report Review
If this is your story and you wish to respond to reviews, please login
Add a Review