Reading Reviews for Purgatory , Chapter 4: Panic
6 Reviews Found

Review #1, by dirtydeedsdonedirtcheap 

25th May 2012:
But it does make sense that he gets his way and you're just the one who follows orders

^ She's so clever! I was nervous for Narcissa during this entire chapter because I thought they were going to do something to her but I figured she would be able to get herself out of their clutches and rush off. I just didn't think she'd break her wand in the process which is just terrible because what's a witch without her wand? Merely a muggle.

When she was making him go to sleep I was reminded of the times I used to take pilates class and we would end the class with meditation. The descriptions and the catatonic voice kind of make me do a deep breathing technique (which is weird) and I found myself leaning back and getting lulled to sleep.

Your writing is that powerful.

Author's Response: Narcissa is not a damsel in distress; she's got a brain and she's going to put it to use. The whole story after this boils down to the fact that her wand broke in this chapter. If it hadn't broken, she would have been able to Apparate home; no harm done. She probably would have found more trouble back there, but it would have been a completely different path than the one now forced on her.

Eee, yay! I was influenced by Patrick Jane in The Mentalist for this bit; sometimes he hypnotizes people into doing things. :D

Thank you for reading and reviewing!!

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Review #2, by x3CherryWatermelonx3 

29th November 2011:
Another lovely chapter!

Can't wait to find out what will happen next! Always keeping me guessing again and again! That was a wonderful thing for Narcissa to do by the way - how you described it all and such. Perfect! :)

Author's Response: Thank you. Keeping people guessing is always something I hope to do but worry I won't (because in my own head it looks very predictable). Thank you for reading!!

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Review #3, by halfbreed 

9th September 2011:
I was a little "Eh" with the whole lulling-the-guard-to-sleep thing at first--because it seemed a bit obvious, like who would fall for it, but I guess that just proves how easily manipulated those guys are--but when you mentioned that it's what Narcissa did to get her mother to sleep, I approved of it much more. Because I was also thinking it wasn't perhaps the most realistic for someone to come with that off the top of their head; but if she's done it before, I can totally see that.

I think that revealed a lot about her emotional character because although it was mentioned before that she took care of her mother (and gave up a lot to do it, wow), this reinforces that and makes it really stick. I think it's doing a perfect job of setting her up to soften a certain beastie's heart :P

You just think of everything, don't you? And not to mention execute it superbly. The emotion in your writing makes everything so realistic and tangible. I so love this.

Author's Response: Honestly, this chapter could use a bit of editing. When she's lulling her captor to sleep, yes, she had experience with her mother. However, it could've been a bit more realistic. I will definitely keep your words in mind when I go to polish it eventually.

The thing about Narcissa is that even though she was willing to drop her life to take care of her mother, she was somewhat grudging about it. She resents the situation she was put in - and her family, to an extent. Narcissa's not the purest character ever. She's a bit selfish, a bit greedy. Her motivations aren't always the best. But I think that's what I like about this version of Narcissa.

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Review #4, by TenthWeasley 

22nd June 2011:
Ha! I love Narcissa more and more with each chapter - she's so plucky, and I was giggling that whole time she was lulling Lewisberg to sleep. I really liked that scene - it showed a lot of her character and the person you see her as, in this story at least.

His glass eye gleamed reflectively

I tried to Apparate several times, hoping that I would move through time and space and not constantly find myself slamming into concrete air.

Those are my two favorite sentences in the entire chapter. I love the wordplay in the first one -- how the glass eye was both literally reflective, and one can express reflection through an eye. I don't know if this was on purpose, but when I caught it I was so jealous of your writing. :D (Which isn't new, but whatever.)

And then in the second sentence, I love the imagery you used in describing the air as concrete. That just explains so much about apparition, and it's a really clever thing to say.

This is (once again!) such an inventive and original story -- I have a hard time coming up with things on my own, and you seem to do it so effortlessly, with your story and red pumpkins and characters and EVERYTHING. I am so jealous. :3

This story reminds me a bit of The Book of Lost Things -- did you read that? I can't remember if I recommended it to you or not. If you haven't, I definitely say do it! But my purpose in bringing that up is that you can create a sort of ethereal world that borrows JK's characters but stands alone, and that's magic in itself.

What is that light?? PLEASE BE LUCIUS. And then Narcissa can have her Prince Charming and Lucius will no longer be beastly and they can have blonde babies. The end. (Obviously this can't happen, because you have more story to go. But I can dream.) I'm off to read the next chapter -- this is SO addicting!!




Plucky Narcissa. :D I'm worried, even now, about her character. I feel like I'm viewing everything about this story from too closely, because I know what is to come and what will play out and about character development. So I worry that I'm not developing the characters enough NOW, and looking at them from a different angle than the readers see them.

Thank you for your wonderful reviews, my friend. They make my life go spinny spinny happy-time.

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Review #5, by academica 

24th May 2011:
This is absolutely delightful to read. Very interesting concept and exceptionally well-written. I can't wait until your next chapter upload!

Author's Response: Thank you so much! I'm very excited about writing this story. There are endless plot bunnies; so many ways to interpret these fairy tales. I'm glad you're liking it so far.


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Review #6, by TheHeirOfSlytherin 

24th May 2011:

Can't wait for the next chapter!

Author's Response: Thank you!! I'm glad you like it. :)

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