17 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Debra20 

5th February 2013:
SUSAN, OH MY GOD!! I never intended to start my review like this, so random, but I have to tell you...I have to! I was right!!! Moody feels like Mr Rochester. Oh my dear Susan you can't even imagine how I felt when I realised this. It made me love your story ten times better. Jane Eyre is one of my favourite love stories ever and to see Charlotte Bronte's style so flawlessly reproduced AND adapted to your Harry Potter novella (which is far far away from the time Charlotte Bronte lived :P) is just amazing.

My heart is still racing from the surge of emotion that hit me when I read your author's note. It's final...I am in love with Moody. With YOUR Moody! And I will never ever be able to imagine him other than how you wrote him. His passion, his fierce yet collected love (barely collected), his whole appearance, his movements, how he leans on door frames, mantle pieces with such an elegance and composure, these images of Moody will live in my memory forever. It's like I'm seeing Mr Rochester only better, because you've added your touch of originality to his character. And of boy does his wife remind me of Bertha Mason, the woman loved by all but despised by him. Please allow me a very big and silly fan girlish scream because this is too much!

I am absolutely mesmerised by your description. It's simple enough but with just the right touch of visual images to recreate what must have been your image of the house, the rooms, the smells and the sensations. It blends perfectly with the characters bringing them further to life.

Wow! I never imagined I'd stumble upon this kind of story when I first clicked it this morning. I'm not out of my trance yet...please slap me because now I want to BE Lily, to LIVE what she is living. Is that bad? :(

Author's Response: Moody became most like Rochester in these two chapters - this and the one that follows - because by that point, the similarities between this and Jane Eyre were too difficult to deny. The story drifts away from Bronte's novel later on, but here, the Gothic atmosphere of the cottage and its crazed owner at their peak. These chapters were amazing to write at the same time that they were utterly painful. The amount of emotion in them made it hard to breathe.

The corresponding scenes in Jane Eyre are strangely less popular in adaptations and discussion about the book than I'd expect. When Rochester begs Jane to stay with him is perhaps one of the most passionate and extraordinary scenes in literature - it is Jane's strongest moment, yet it's also her weakest because she feels so much for him, and is utterly powerless to help him.

What's funny is that I originally had "Rebecca" in mind when writing this chapter. The whole scene with the closet and Lily's interaction with the malevolent spirit of the wife more closely align with Du Maurier than Bronte. Whether Moody is like Maxim de Winter is less certain, though - like you, I see Moody as being more comparable to Rochester. There's too much of him, and it bursts out like a flame to consume everything in his path.

I don't think I've ever written a story where the setting was so integral to the plot as the cottage (and wardrobe) are important to this story. It had a significant influence on the atmosphere - the OF version of this story, which I came up with first, takes place in a theatre, so that story is filled with colour, light, and chaos, but in this isolated cottage, there's only darkness and dissatisfaction. Not always and not for everyone, since Neville seems happy enough living there, and once you get to the last chapter, you'll see how different the cottage can be when viewed in the right light. But here, it might as well be a Gothic castle, it's so gloomy. I loved writing the descriptions for this story... as you can tell from my excitement to discuss it... *hides*

Thank you again for reading and reviewing this story! It means a lot to hear from you! ^_^

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Review #2, by academica 

13th August 2012:
I couldn't imagine anyone with so many enemies, except for my father.

^Love this. Lily makes an excellent point.

This is so delightfully creepy! I don't think I was expecting as much suspense as I found in this chapter, and it's really pulled me in. You've got the plot suspense - Moody having a wife, Moody being madly in love with a girl from the future - and the suspense that you've written in your haunting imagery. The ending line actually made me jump.

Gah, I think this review is useless, but this is so interesting! I really admire Lily's deductive skills, how she thought about the wooden leg and then realized that he did not yet have it at this point. I love her curiosity about the woman who married him, and about their maladaptive interactions. I love the balance between her not knowing enough, and Moody not knowing enough, and both of them seeming frustrated in different ways about it all.

Fascinating. I must return soon :)

♥ Amanda

Author's Response: Thank you for this review! :O It was a great treat to receive it - I'm so glad that you're continuing with this story, and that you are enjoying it too. I'm a sorry sentimentalist when it comes to this story - it definitely is "my baby" - so any praise for it has me dancing for joy. :D

It was interesting when I realized that Lily was caught between two worlds that weren't really that different - she understands the life of an Auror because she's seen her father live it. The whole thing makes for a strange circle in which Moody influences Harry, Harry influences Lily, and Lily influences Moody - so, as the chicken and egg question would have it, what is the starting point? If Moody says something to Lily, and she repeats it to him at an earlier stage, is he repeating her, or she him? Time paradoxes are so much fun, and so absolutely confusing. :P

No review of yours could be useless! You've pointed out the details I was hoping would stand out to readers - like Lily's observation skills (part of her Dad's training, I expect) in contrast with her emotional observations on Moody's wife. Both have to do with interpretation, but Lily reveals her heart in her speculations about Mrs. Moody.

Thank you again for the lovely review! I look forward to your thoughts on the remainder of the story. ^_^

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Review #3, by Lillylover22 

12th May 2012:
Jane eyre is one of my favourite books. 9/10 : )

Author's Response: It's one of my favourites, too - I've always wanted to see how it could be reworked into the Potterverse, and this was the result. ;)

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Review #4, by LilyFire 

29th February 2012:
Again, you have entranced with your words. I dont know how you do it, bring the characters and scenes and everything to life in a womderful way so that they play before my eyes. I've read published authors with a lot less talent and ability than you posess.

And the plot of this story is so good. It still remimds me of The Time Travelers Wife, but I feel that Moody and Lily will never end up like the two from that story, while still thinking that maybe-just maybe-the woman in the portrait is Lily and that is why she doesnt show herself.

Anyway, its an amazing story.

Author's Response: Wow, thank you! :O I'm very glad to have written something that's had such an affect upon you. Your compliment is amazing, and I don't know what to say in response except for a big, happy "thank you!" It means an incredible amount that you think I have that much talent. ^_^

After these early chapters, the similarities to TTW die down, not entirely, but this story doesn't jump around in Moody's life - it's more linear than TTW - and of course the ending is different. Still with a touch of the tragic, but not quite so melodramatic as TTW. :P I'm not revealing anymore about the plot than that.

Thanks again for reading and reviewing the story! I hope that you enjoy the rest as well! :D

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Review #5, by long_live_luna_bellatrix 

23rd February 2012:
So here I am again, slowly making my way along. I read this chapter in bits in pieces, so I'll just chat a little about some of the ones that stood out for me. :)

Firstly, I can't believe Lily's been going back in time for at least thirty years of Moody's life. Well, I can believe it, but that's a long span of time for them to cover. And because she remains the same age, it means the adventures must come one after the other for her. It's so odd to try and balance the two in your mind. Time travel is tricky business, but you're handling it well so far.

It's also fascinating to think that Lily is the cause of Moody's true madness. If that's what you were going for. Because it makes perfect sense that Moody would go mad watching Lily come in and out of his life for thirty-plus years, and it's as original an idea as I've ever seen.

Yet another good wrinkle was the introduction of Moody's late wife. I've read Rebecca far more recently than Jane Eyre, and I see the connection. I'd love to know why he married her and more of their relationship, and how Lily plays into it all. It's not exactly a common situation. ;)

So, once again, great job all around. If I find anything worth suggesting I assure you I won't be quiet about it, but until that day I'll just keep heaping on the praise.

Author's Response: Bits and pieces works very well - I do it all the time, too, mostly because of a lack of time, but that's the fun about fanfiction; it never has to go back to the library on time. :P It's fantastic that you've come back to continue reading this story - I really appreciate being able to hear from you!

The strangest and perhaps most difficult part of this story is the way that Lily doesn't age at all while she's travelling through someone else's lifetime. Yet although she's not aging, she is developing because of the amount of time that she travels through; she changes considerably, and that's what odd about the schematics of this story, but I'm glad to hear that it's working out. :)

It would be maddening to have someone continuously appear in your life who doesn't change while you keep growing. It's a pretty common plot in science fiction, when I think about it, so I knew the basics of how it should work. It doesn't happen in fanfiction very much for some reason, though Doctor Who has done it, as have a lot of books I read when younger. However, making it work for Moody is the challenge: fitting the whole plot into his background in a way that's canon - taking his character in the books and pulling it apart slowly as I move further back in time.

I can't say anything else about the plot, though, if you'll excuse me. :P I look forward to hearing your opinions on how things develop! Thank you again for reading and reviewing this story!

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Review #6, by justonemorefic 

13th January 2012:
Ooh, I love this bit: I had a terrible feeling that I, not the cabinet, was being controlled by some unknown force. ...Fate was too slippery, too entirely based on coincidence. It's quite mysterious in that destiny-fate sort of sense, but I like this foreshadowing that there's more to it. I wonder if there will be a time where Lily will have to figure out exactly how it works.

Gah, I just totally read through the middle without writing anything. I love this Moody, so different and so much younger than the one I saw in the last chapter. Completely opposite in how much he knows. Wow, I wonder what it must've been like for him, to go 26 years without seeing Lily in the last chapter. Can't imagine what his life with his wife was like.

There's too many good bits in this chapter :3

Author's Response: It's a fine line between fate and free will, and Lily will have to figure out just where it falls. ;) But you'll see - I won't say anything more at present because you'll find it out soon enough.

It's strange developing a character in reverse like this, but I'm glad that the difference shows in this 26 year gap - I wasn't sure at first if it would work. Thanks so much for reading and reviewing again, Gina. It's much appreciated! ^_^

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Review #7, by ForgottenFace 

5th January 2012:
I read this a couple of days ago, but didn't know how to phrase the review. I had to read it again, but I still don't know how to review this xD It's not the first time it has happened, it happened with the second chapter of "Venom" - I've read it some time ago, but didn't know what to say xD

I have this crack pot theory that both the person/thing that's knocking on the cabinet and the woman in the portrait are Lily. I dont know why or how, but I'm getting this feeling that at least one of them is her.

Even more crack pot is the other theory I have that there is a twin portrait inside the cabinet and the one doing the knocking or thud's on the cabinet is the woman from the portrait.

But don't mind my theories, I'm sure I'm going to discover what's going on soon =P

Author's Response: Oh dear, the chapters leave you speechless? These two stories are complex monsters - emotionally and mentally draining to write because there's a lot going on, lots of epic (on my side at least, I can never tell what's going on on the reader's side :P).

Crackpot theories are always welcome! The whole Doctor Who influence on this story means lots of theories are necessary to hook readers along, haha. I love including all the puzzles in this story, slowly revealing more and more as I go along, but also including details that make one doubt those theories. :P One can't be sure of the answers...

... and don't expect me to reveal anything. XD

I like your theories, though. Very interesting... ;)

Thanks very much for reading and reviewing this story, Becca! It's a pleasure to hear from you! ^_^

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Review #8, by Forever_More 

15th November 2011:
Quite an extraordinary story, i must say! Every time i read one of your stories i am blown away. This is one of my favorite fan fictions that I've ever read and I'm quite surprise, i don't usually like to read story set later then the marauders. This is seriously really well written, i love it!

Author's Response: Wow! Thank you very much for your compliments to this story, gosh - I hardly know how to reply except to give you lots and lots of thanks. It means a lot that this is one of your favourite fanfictions - it's one that I love to write (however much the chapter I'm writing is giving me trouble, alas), and hearing that people enjoy it makes my day! ^_^

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Review #9, by shadowcat2 

6th November 2011:
I have a feeling that Lily was Moody's wife. You're an amazing writer. It's all so confusing but I can't stop reading it.

Author's Response: Mmm, I can't say anything about that matter, but it's a good guess, to be sure. ;)

Thank you very much for reading and reviewing! I'm sorry that the story is confusing - I am trying to keep that from happening, but then I get caught up in the utter craziness of writing a story moving around so much in time. It means a lot that, nevertheless, you still can't stop reading. ^_^

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Review #10, by Weasleynumber8 

9th July 2011:
OMG love the allusions! Jane Eyre's my favorite book and Rebecca's my favorite Hitchcock film! Maybe that's why I love this story so much ;)

Author's Response: Haha, you've definitely got good taste, then. ;) It's great to hear that you're enjoying this story, too. Thank you!

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Review #11, by Phoenix_Flames 

20th June 2011:
Wow, wow, wow. I am still bewildered and trying to figure this out sentence by sentence.

I'm starting to believe that Lily might be Moody's wife which sounds really odd now, but I'm beginning to see it. The woman in the portrait didn't show herself. Lily would have surely known upon seeing herself; Moody wanted to touch her face earlier, and he said that she never ages. This is so interesting. I'm probably wrong, but I'm so fascinated I don't really care about being wrong.

This is amazing and enthralling. I love it. I love your characterization of the younger Moody. He does seem mad, but he also seems so insightful. So full of wisdom. A genius.

This is wonderful, Susan! I love it!

Author's Response: You know, you're the first person to come up with that possible outcome. I was wondering when someone would mention it, as it's possible, but Lily doesn't, or doesn't want to, see it. Even if you turn out to be wrong, it's still a fascinating idea, one that always comes up in discussion of "Jane Eyre" or "Rebecca" - how the wife and the protagonist are linked in a strange way as reflections of one another. ;)

Yay! You like my Moody! I'm worried about him because he starts to become a sort of Byronic, romantic hero and that scares me a little - he's Mad-Eye Moody, after all, that gruff, slightly repulsive Auror. I've given him a lot of brains because of his success as an Auror - to catch all those Dark Wizards would take a lot of cleverness and cunning, at least in my opinion.

So glad that you're liking this story so much. It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy. ^_^ Thank you!

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Review #12, by Padfoot23 

27th April 2011:
This sounds like a really good story :D Hope you update soon :)

Author's Response: Thank you very much! I'm so glad that you're enjoying it! ^_^

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Review #13, by SunSation Gal 07 

25th April 2011:
Dang Susan! It seems with every chapter of this story it keeps getting better and better. You have a gift. :) Cause this story is brilliant and I am loving it so far. The characterization of Lily, seeing Moody at different ages and what he was like when he was younger. And the interaction between the two of them is brilliant. You are brilliant Susan and I look forward to reading more of this :)

Author's Response: *blushes* Thank you so much! It's wonderful to hear these compliments from you, and it means a lot that you're enjoying this story to such an extent. ^_^

I wasn't sure about this chapter, as I seem to be losing grasp on the style, and it also felt as though this chapter was getting too long and drawn out. It's too addicting to write their interactions - they're becoming fascinating characters, especially Moody. ;)

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Review #14, by MajiKat 

19th April 2011:
*grins* my fault? awesome.

oh my god. this chapter gave me shivers. im feeling very creeped out - congratulations! what stunning atmosphere susan. loved the circular motion - the repetition at the beginning and end of the chapter. what does it mean that she hears the sound again? hmmm

before I'd read your authors note i was thinking of that wedding scene in Jane Eyre O.O...strange how i can make all these connections to a story i'm not overly fond of. i love it, but i don't, at the same time, lol.

moody was magnificent! so tortured and the wife hiding in the portrait - i couldn't help but think madwoman in the attic, lol, even though she's not she gave me that feeling - the hiding, not letting lily see her.

i love the mystery in this, there is this swirling quality to it that i think really captures the confusion of time so well. i like that lily knows but doesn't know anything at the same time.

when i read this chapter, it was a different image i had in my head to the previous ones. if i was to talk about colours...the first chapter felt sort of golden to me, soft and warm; the second, the colours had darkened and there was more red and more depth to everything, esp the scene with moody. in this chapter however, the reds are vivid, and there is a lot of darker shades.

you probably think im as mad as moody but i see colours when i think of mood and tone (comes from being a musician as well i suppose, and having to consider timbre/tone colour)

the plot is moving fabulously. like i said, there is a swirling, turning feel to this narrative and lily's voice is growing stronger as, i assume, she is growing stronger inside, or maybe i have read to much into it. i feel that she, through these meetings with moody and through what happens between them and the mystery of the whole situation has given her strength. she feels different than she did only two chapters ago.

okay, essay done ^_^
I could keep going - I'm feeling strangely academic right now and i have no idea why, lol.

Kate xx

Author's Response: lol, your fault, yes. :P Now that it's in my head, I can't drop it, though it's helped the story quite a lot, and I'm very thankful for that. I looked back at the chapter when Jane leaves Rochester and the fraught emotion was very helpful for the next chapter of this story. ;)

It's good to hear that the chapter was as creepy for you as it was for me. There's something eerie about Moody and the portrait and the whole atmosphere - it's very Gothic, and my skin crawled while I was writing it.

The portrait is a combination of "madwoman in the attic" and the portrait from Rebecca that haunts the narrator - the Potterverse's allowance for living portraits really saves me a lot of time and energy as it means I don't need to include another character, no Bertha or Mrs Danvers.

This chapter is definitely more passionate, and therefore harsher red tones suit it perfectly. Anger, madness, desperation, they're all here and also in the next chapter. The silk scarf is Gryffindor coloured, yet it's also representative of Moody's madness and even lustful passion. The rest of the scene is very shadowy and dark, even though it is the middle of the day now, due to the heavy walnut panelling in the cottage. It's a very moody place. ;) I like the idea of describing each chapter based on colour - the first chapter has the sunset, the second was very dark, and now this one is a vibrant red. I wonder what you'll see in future chapters and look forward to hearing about it. :D

I'm also fascinated by the swirling patterns of the story. There's certainly a lot of repetition, and readers have to pay attention to the little symbols that recur throughout - the trunks, the ring, the fireplace, the scarf - as they mark the passage of time more clearly than any watch ever could. There's a strange timelessness to the cottage that makes discovering the truth very difficult, as Lily continues to discover.

Thank you so much for these reviews, Kate. It's wonderful to read your opinions on each chapter and on the story as a whole - they're making me think very carefully about the plot and characters and how they're all developing. You're being a huge help, so thank you! ^_^

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Review #15, by Snapdragons 

19th April 2011:
-shivers- This story is wonderful. Just enough confusion and mystery, but not so much as to make it off-putting or hard to follow.

I can definitely see both Jane Eyre and Rebecca in this, now that you mention it... excellent! ;)

I'm curious to find out as to what or who is controlling the cabinet, and where the messages are coming for. Also, I definitely did not see Moody having a wife coming - that was a surprise.

I just rewatched the Doctor Who episode "The Girl in the Fireplace" (from 06, with Ten and Rose) and that's what this really reminds me of, especially with the line "For he had loved another, the girl from the vanishing cabinet." Dunno if you watch Doctor Who or saw that episode, but it's sort of similar, except I guess Lily would be the Doctor in this case :P

It's sad to see Moody before insanity... especially knowing the end. You're really wonderful at crafting together a strange timeline and somehow having it make sense and making it compelling to read. Your style of writing is just beautiful and I love everything about it! :) Great job, this story is quickly becoming one of my favorites.

(Also, just a note... it has the chapter name as "The Wrong Time" again but the top of the chapter and the image say "The Worst Time?")

Author's Response: It's a challenge to keep things from getting too confusing, as I tend to get plotlines and such all mixed up, but with this story, I'm really working to keep everything under control, yet still allow for a reasonable margin of mystery and suspense. I'm really glad to hear that it's working out, and hopefully I can keep it up. ^_^

I'd forgotten about the Girl in the Fireplace! It was one of my favourite episodes too, but it's been a while since I last saw it. Doctor Who is certainly a major influence, though the Doctor/River Song story has been what I've drawn from most of all - the whole meeting in reverse order idea is fascinating, though ultimately tragic. But when I think to that particular episode with Rainette, there was that same aspect - the Doctor caught only snapshots of her life and always seemed to miss her, especially at the end (that part made me cry, gah). I love that show too much, way too much. XD

Thank you so much for your wonderful comments! I really appreciate hearing from you and it's just fantastic that you're enjoying the story. Thank you! :D

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Review #16, by TheHeirOfSlytherin 

19th April 2011:
One random question - What is this chapter actually called? Because at the top it say The Wrong Time but on and just below the chapter image it says The Worst Time. My curious mind wonders ^_^

The more I read this story, the more I love. I have Jane Eyre (the book) but never finished it. I have, however, seen the film; a good enough substitute to understand what you're talking about in your author's note. And I agree; he is good for Moody's character.

Gosh, it's so strange thinking of him as Alastor. When Lily said his given name my first thought was "who? Why've you changed characters? What's happened to Moody...oh, wait..." lol. Ah, welcome to my mind.

Can't wait for the next chapter! 10/10.

P.S. I got The Time Traveller's (spelling?) Wife for the movie premise challenge and decided that, though I won't be entering (obviously :P), it would be nice to participate in my challenge lol.

My pairing seems as different as yours (at least in my head); Regulus/Hermione. ^_^

Author's Response: Thanks for pointing that out because I somehow got mixed up with the old chapter title - my fingers typed it out by themselves, silly things. I've changed it to the correct title now, though, so all's well. :D

The part(s) of Jane Eyre that I'm mostly drawing from are those around the middle, just after Jane discovers that he's already married - particularly the scene when he "tempts" her to stay with him. The earlier chapter when she meets the old Moody somewhat mirrors the ending of Jane Eyre, but it's not a very strong connection - this chapter and the next one are the closest. So not having finished the book is definitely fine - the film(s) cover this part of the novel really well, as it's so wonderfully dramatic. ^_^

It would be cool to try more of a "Time Traveller's Wife" idea for a story - where the time travelling is biological, coming from within rather than from an outside object. It'd be interesting to see it with a spell gone wrong or something like that. :D You should definitely try it, especially with that pairing, as it has lots of potential.

Thank you again for reading and reviewing this story! I'm really glad that you're enjoying it and I'm even more happy that I entered your challenge - it's been fantastic to write a story like this!

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Review #17, by GubraithianFire 

19th April 2011:
Ever since I read Kate's review (I'm as good at stalking other people's reviews as I am their stories), I've been thinking of this in terms of Jane Eyre too. Not that that's a bad thing, even if it wasn't my favorite, because it's an interesting parallel I never would have made on my own. I liked Rebecca much more, and again, I never would have thought of it myself, but I see the inspiration. Actually I had to reread the middle of the chapter, when Lily talks to the portrait, because I wasn't exactly sure what was going on, but it makes much more sense now that I'm paying attention.

This story does require a lot of attention, and since I've got in the habit of not doing so, I'm really excited that updates on this are going so swimmingly; I need to get my brain moving in terms that don't involve Soviet propaganda or Napoleonic authority and other school stuff I like but don't want to think about. Anyway -- I really like this story. I remember the thread asking for help about making time travel unique, but since I generally avoid it like the plague, had nothing to add. Also, the logistics drive me slightly crazy. So that you've managed to do this and execute it so well makes me respect you even more. It makes me excited to think about the quality of stuff here, it gives me faith in time-travel and in HPFF in general.

I'm really very jealous of you. You're so smart and savvy and you write so well and I really don't have that much to say -- my thoughts are kind of jumbled -- beyond "I really like the idea and the actuality of this story" ♥

Author's Response: lol, a review stalker! Well, if it's meant that you've found your way to this story, then I'm very thankful. I'll have to try out that habit myself - it sounds like a good way to find new stories. ^_^

Rebecca was originally the main inspiration for this story, which made it interesting that Jane Eyre was also joining the fray, as, although they're closely related, I find them very different in atmosphere and mood - Rochester is far more romantic than de Winter, and Rebecca far more terrifying than Bertha.

A story that needs to be paid attention to? And there I was trying to write something simpler, without too many subplots and the minimum of characters, yet it requires lots of attention. :P But it's doing what it's supposed to - provide an escape of sorts from RL. ;)

Wow, Gubby. I don't think you could have given me a better compliment. Time travel is sorrowfully abused, and once I had this plot bunny, I had to run with it - it showed me how much potential time travel has. I'm really glad to hear that you've liked this story so far and liked the idea of it. That means so much, especially when it's coming from someone as amazing as you. *glomps*

Thank you so much for reading and reviewing this story! ^_^

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