67 Reviews Found

Review #1, by shayrocks50 

27th January 2015:
Your story just makes sense. For some reason it fits prefectly in the lives of the marauders and Lily. I really like it, and I don't normally enjoy Lily/James fives:)

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Review #2, by cath91 

7th February 2014:
Oh no. Poor Lily. Poor Sirius! Of course they are still getting over Mary's death, and then her dad died on top of it, oh goodness.

I like the change in James, you started it at the end of TAOB and it's expanded now, it makes it entirely plausible that the immature fifth-year we saw in OotP is Head Boy just over a year later.

I was wondering, do you absolutely plan on finishing this fic? I only ask cause I noticed it hasn't been updated in a while. I really want to read it but if there is a chance it's going to get abandoned, I wont, it bums me out too much!

Author's Response: Hi cath91! I've really enjoyed reading all your reviews and it's really lovely to have you here! It's honestly great that you've read TAOB and the beginning of TAOS and liked them!

I am definitely planning on finishing this fic! Things have been very weird for me over here. Without going into too much detail, I basically happened to do something very VERY productive for case of writing-career, freaked out about it gained the worst case of weriters block I've ever had. I'm working on it, though, and this story is SO nearly finished I promise you!

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Review #3, by AlexFan 

12th October 2013:
I'm on my touchscreen and the stupid thing froze and I lost the entire review that I had written out and now I'm retyping it and dealing with autocorrect and the fact that I want nothing more than to punch my touchscreen in the face.

Anyway, because I'm lazy this is going to be a shorter version of what I had originally written.

It's so strange to be seeing things from Lily's point of view because I never imagined that things would be his dark with her. It's understandable of course what with Mary dying and her dad dying (apparently). But still, I just never pictured happy Lily Evans to be this sad or this broken but at the same time I like this side of her. It just goes to show that there's more to a person than you think.

Lily's probably always felt something like this but she just hid it from everyone so that no one would ask questions or something. Her year is definitely not off to a good start and I'm definitely looking forward to what happened over the summer with her and her family and find out what's going on there.

And Sirius, my poor baby! LET ME HUG YOU!

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Review #4, by Ellawh 

6th July 2013:
Seems to be a great story! And I loved taob so I'm very happy you did a sequel! :)

Author's Response: Hi there Ellawh, glad you like it thus far! Hope you enjoy the rest :) :)

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Review #5, by T 

30th June 2013:
Wow! Awesome! Bravo deserves a dobby! I loved it!!!

Author's Response: Awwh, thank you so much, T!! :)

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Review #6, by M 

30th June 2013:
Breathtaking!!! I am sooo glad you wrote this!

Author's Response: Aaa, thank you so much M!

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Review #7, by M 

30th June 2013:
Amazing! Lily is so-wow.

Author's Response: Awwh, stop! You'll make me blush :)

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Review #8, by PolyJuice_ 

14th February 2013:
I'm back for more reviews!

What can I say? Fantastic as always. :)

Lily, you're such a drama queen! Well, what's new? I mean, of course she has a fair enough reason to be all moody. I'm madly shipping Jily by this point, though I'm also a huge fan of Sirius/Lily in your story too. Entirely platonic however, but I love when they have their heart to hearts.



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Review #9, by Missy 

30th December 2012:
The Art of Breathing was fantastic, I stayed up until 7:45am reading it (thank god for winter break!) It took me a day of Ben and Jerry's and crying (it handled terminal illness and the mix of emotions that come with it exceptionally well) to start reading this but I seriously can't get enough. Even just after the first chapter it's very intriguing, lily is a fascinating character. Coming from someone who honestly never ever thought they would be reading fan fiction, these stories are amazing and could really be written as an actual book.

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Review #10, by alicia and anne 

25th November 2012:
Wow, just wow. I am speechless.
This first chapter was such an amazing first chapter, I had so many emotions running through me right then. I almost cried, everyone is so sad and you got their feelings and emotions across so brilliantly. It was just... WOW!
I am gobsmacked by the amazingness of this chapter and how everything was fitting together and how sad Lily was and her snapping, her friends being annoyed at her.
Seriously I can't stop saying wow! I can't wait to read more. It was so dark and sad and amazing.
I also can't believe that Mary is gone :-( I keep expecting her to turn up :-(
You wrote this brilliantly, you have such a way with words you should be a description Queen of some sort! :D

Author's Response: Thanks so much! This was such a lovely review to recieve and made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside! You're so aces! Ee I don't know what else to say but thankythankythankthankyou and I'll take the title of description Queen with honour :D


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Review #11, by TheGoldenKneazle 

24th October 2012:
I may or may not have arrived for an R&R-spree :D Several things have contributed - I was rereading TAOB for, like, the fifth time and was halfway through when you won not one but TWO SHINY DOBBIES and suddenly couldn't bear not continuing to read this lovely part of the Marauders' story, and then just as I was on my way to your author page, I saw your fabulous blog! And since I was having fun debating which story to shower with your QTR riddles/SOTM reviews, this was perfect. So, in other words, HELLO HELEN.

Oooh it's such a lovely first chapter, especially with all the amaze parallels to TAOB! September 1st, Sirius, James, carriage things... asdfghjkl it's just so beautiful and made we want to cry ALREADY :'( it was refreshing to see how things had changed, though; some of our characters are so similar, some are so different, and most in the middle somewhere :P

Lily was characterised so brilliantly! From seeing her from Mary's POV to 1st-person post-Mary and post-Dad it's just fabulous how you've managed to cover that large a gap in such a relatively small word count.

It's nice to watch such drama brewing too :O feels like coming home haha! and you've laid down so many foundations for big, blow-up-type issues that suddenly feel as though they need addressing. especially now we can have another byotch-Brocklehurst (I FEEL MARY SO MUCH IN THIS). And though you're not overdoing the 'Mary's dead' thing, her presence is strong without Lily walking around with a sign over her head saying "I AM ANGSTY ABOUT THIS". It's just demonstrated nicely, and the camaraderie already coming is LUSH 8D

Yup, this cliffie officially kills me (minor one though it is) and sadly these reviews will be weirdly spaced because there's stuff I have to do now :( BUT I'LL BE BACK. xoxox

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Review #12, by Paige_Weasley 

19th October 2012:
. . . OMR . . . She's acting like Mary (R.I.P) . . .

Author's Response: Awwh, RIP Mary :(

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Review #13, by Christiana 

26th September 2012:
im interested in this new story on lily. i really loved her and james in taob. i hope sirius doesnt date anyone after mary...is that selfish? i just dont see how anyone else could work with him.

Author's Response: I can't decide whether or not it is. I'm not sure Sirius can either. We'll see :)

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Review #14, by Maelody 

12th May 2012:
The only thing I kept thinking (mainly because my cat has decided to lay right on my chest and under my nose) is where is Prongs? I noticed the cat sort of disappeared shortly after being introduced in Breathing, but I was sort of hoping he would be introduced again, or does that come up later? :) Otherwise, I do like it, but right at this moment, I think Lily is too much like Mary. I'll have to read on to get away from that, seeing as how I'm probably just withdrawing from Mary humor. Good chapter and I will continue later (when it is not 5:30 in the morning and I am dead exhausted).


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Review #15, by Mutt N Feathers 

1st May 2012:
Okay, I'm reading this, and it's emotional; but I am not crying. You'd better not make me weep, lest I take time off and return in the summer.

Are you doing this unbeta'ed? There are some mild mechanical and spelling errors within. If you need a full time beta, we should chat. I beta to help me relax (I know, strange huh). I'm dealing with some medical issues, and have long periods of waiting in offices and treatment rooms. Me and my laptop pass time. Let me know if I can be of help. I'm a fan, which you probably guessed by now.


Author's Response: Hey there MNF! First offs I just want to say it's been a real pleasure seeing your review trickle in over these past couple of day and yeah, I am writing this unbeta'd at the moment - mostly because, well, I have quite a lot of stories and the idea of getting beta's for all of them seemed quite daunting. If you'd like to though, that would really be lovely!

And thanks for all these lovely reviews! I really appreciate all the time and effort it took to read/review this :)


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Review #16, by house elf 

3rd March 2012:
I'm so glad there's a sequel (which I like very much so far, just so you know) to TAOB, otherwise I think I'd get withdrawal symptoms...

By the way, near the beginning, Lily smiles twice.
'I smiled. "No, this is Petunia." I smiled.'

That's it. There are a lot less typos than in taob, too :D



Thanks, house_elf! ;)


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Review #17, by Giselle 

1st March 2012:
Do you realize that I read The Art of Breathing in like two days. I didn't stop reading this is just amazing writing, amazing plot, and generally just amazing. You have the sheer talent to connect to all your characters and have your connect wonderfully to other people. You have the sheer talent to write relatably to these young teenagers lifes. I'm jealous of this talent don't ever stop writing your wonderful.

Author's Response: I don't understand the physical possibilities of reading that story in two days BUT I am very impressed by your dedication to the cause, that you found your way over to the sequel and have taken the time to review. It's like WAY exciting for me and i love new readers!

Thank you very much and NO ONE CAN STOP ME WRITING NOW :D


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Review #18, by JeSuisEscargot 

24th February 2012:
Omg didn't you just finish the previous novel thing!
You're writing is so good and your write so fast xD
ur so cool. xP
but did lily's dad die last novel and i miss it or something?

Author's Response: Ahha, I finished TAOB about a year ago - so I haven't been writing that fast.

I'll take the being cool bit though :D

More about that will be explained in the next couple of chapters, my friend ^ :)


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Review #19, by TheProphecy 

31st January 2012:
Helen! Hi!

I finally decided to start the sequel to your fantastic novel - TAOB. This chapter simply reminded me your writing is excellent. I mean, the feelings I had for this chapter alone where ridiculous and on par for what I felt about the last professionally written book I read. Honestly - your characterisation and connection with these characters in your writing is something I deeply admire about your work and it really showed through in this chapter. Even thought it was from Lily's POV there were still times I was just musing about how fantastic Sirius or James was.
Your emotional perception of these characters is also brilliant - I can really appreciate how well you understand the depths of human emotion and considering I think of it as a strength of my own you have successfully made me feel inadequate :P
Keep writing Helen, you have real talent and I look forwards to reading more :)


Author's Response: Hey there! I've already let you know that this review made my day, but I'm here to reiterate that by responding with excessive adjectives and exclaratives.


I think I've always prided myself on /understanding/ people and emotions and I'm really glad that I'm not just arrogant and, yeah, thank you so much.

I won't stop writing. I swear to you, I'm never going to stop.

Thank you so much :)


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Review #20, by loriinwa 

28th January 2012:
It seems like it's 9:18AM, but I'm actually halfway around the world. I stayed up until past 2AM reading your story, right after I've finally adjusted my internal clock for a ten to five sleep. Thanks(; But seriously. Amazing. Life changing, even.

Author's Response: Oh gosh, Loriinwa! It is an honor to count you as one of my readers and one of my reviewers. Sorry about the lack of sleep, and... honestly? If it really was 'life changing' I could die happy :)


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Review #21, by ariellem 

22nd December 2011:
Hello! I was such a huge fan of Art of Breathing, the end made me cry and I just loved it!

This didn't disappoint me, everyone seems to be in more of a somber mood, it's... beautiful writing. My main question is how? How have you done it?


Author's Response: WHOOO KNOWWSS?! I think I'm just a highly depressing person, ah well...

Thank you very much for reviewing! :)


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Review #22, by Cirque Du Freak 

21st October 2011:
I can't be bothered to log in (despite it being a few clicks and stuff away) and I saw your status on the forums so~ I read this and like the second chapter absolute ages ago and I refuse to read it again because otherwise I won't stop and that's another story not reviewed and I can't bear it.

So based off of my extremely bad memory here it goes.


I love the first scene where they have that fight about Lily's mum & sister being muggles and stuff, I really thought it was appropriate especially for that time and the war and stuff and obviously a lot more people are getting killed and all the tension la la la.

I also love how Lily's still so fragile about losing Mary, because really she was her best friend and she's not there anymore and she's had to cope with that at home, but it'll be even worse when Lily knows this is the one place that she would always find Mary even if she was crappy mood - she was still there.

I really like the relationship Lily and James has at the moment, because its a work in progress and its not rushed or anything and James is the perfect one to sort of be there, but not overly so in the way that 'oh you've comforted me lets make babies now'.

ALSO i like how you mentioned that Lily's a lot more adjusted having Sirius around because he'd feel the same/worse about Mary too and its all good development for when Lily would have been good enough friends with Sirius to name him Godfather for Harry so its all lovely and canon and makes sense so yeah.

I feel so sorry for Lily with her dad as well because obviously he'd been such a big part of her life and fathers are always so supportive of their daughters and especially one like Lily who's so determined about things.

Erm yeah I think that's enough gushing for now and I can't remember anything else at all unless I physically read it and as mentioned before I refuse. So.

I love this as you should already know and your writing is as brilliant then as it is now. :D


Author's Response: You're such a great person to come and review just because the number nine makes me uncomfortable, ahha. BEST FRIENDS FOREEVVVA. x3

An actual real life sequel! HOMGOSH (I've been saying that a lot these past couple of days) I dont think I ever imagined that I'd actually write a sequel so this is pretty much crazy times.

Poor fragile little Lily, she's getting a bit better later on in the story but really she's all messed up and Djaosdjiasjdi at the minute because MARYS GONE. Oh, Lordie, I think I'm going to get tearful.

'oh you've comforted me lets make babies now'

^ that line needs to be used in a parody at some point. Or else it is a waste of genius, you know.

Poor Lily :(




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Review #23, by classicblack 

9th September 2011:
Hey! I'm back! The annoying reviewer who had something to say about every chapter in 'The Art of Breathing' except the first two (and that was only because I was too lazy).
It's a great start to what is sure to be a great story! Lily's dad is dead? I don't think you mentioned that in Mary's story. I think it moves the plot along though.
Everyone's feelings in respect to Mary being gone are quiet accurate, I must say. I really wanna give Sirius a hug! I hope Lily lets James in soon so he can fix her. She should respect Mary's last wishes!
Lily's sadness and the mention of Mary make me feel like Mary is reading this over my shoulder and, with the mystical future-seeing powers I'm believing the dead should have, she's smiling at Lily's insane thoughts and the fact that she still (emphasis on the still) doesn't believe that her and James will end up together (of course that would also mean that Mary knew Lily would be joining her soon... but that's beside the point.)
I'm making this all about Mary and Sirius when it should be about Lily and James, I'll stop now.
I promise the reviews for the other chapters won't be nearly as long, and not nearly as rambly. I expect you get tired of reading them.
Until next chapter,

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Review #24, by doglover 

23rd August 2011:
well, that was depressing. but it's to be expected- mary isn't there :( poor sirius!

Author's Response: Poor Sirius :( :( :(

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Review #25, by harrypotterfreak1414 

3rd August 2011:
ok, so I'm sitting here crying. again. because reading this brought me back to taob and how sad the ending was. God. this is amazing! (amazingly sad and a part of me wants to shake you and scream "YOU CANT KILL MARY!!!" but.too late for that. Just don't kill Sirius please god don't kill Sirius.)

Anyways great first chapter. I'm really hoping that this sequel really brings closure to taob, although the rising closure(if that makes sense) and denoument from the taob were fantastic. I'm hoping that you really get into the nitty gritty grief of Lily, James and Sirius.

Best of luck with writing this :) I'll be an avid reader and follower. Just remember to UPDATE :) Because we readers love that.

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