20 Reviews Found

Review #1, by hdawg 

13th August 2012:
Your first sentence has already captured me. It's simplicity is brilliant. This story just keeps getting better and better.

""Oh, oh. Not to fear! this happens occasionally and he always makes it back relatively unscathed. We just wait till morning, figuring he's stealing food down at the kitchens." Filius nodded in a way that he must have considered to be reassuring." I love the fact that the Headmaster knows all about Hugo and his...well, his ineptitude for following rules and acting like a normal fifth year. Not that other fifth years follow rules, it's just that the reason Hugo does it is so childish, and I can't help smiling at just how cute he really is.

""You mean the legendary plant whose fruit produces a ruby that contains highly magical properties and whose flesh will cure most exotic diseases?" This plant sounds wonderful. No wonder Hugo went looking for it. I'd be impressed and would fall into his arms if he even know anything about this plant, and thus would help him on his quest to find it (and fall in love along the way...)

"It turned some wizards into gods, didn't it?" Ohmygod Hugo Weasley as a God. For some reason, in my head, he looks like Loki (when he's all dressed up to be a God)...

This is so apt and so lovely. Scorpius loves Hugo (bromances ftw!) and yet Hugo probably can't even tie up his own shoelaces without falling over, let alone know how much he worries people: "Scorpius didn't like to admit it, as he didn't like to assign the uncouth characteristic of impotence to any of Rose's kin, but he worried about Hugo. A boy with a seemingly unnatural ability to play and strategise in Quidditch but who lacked any self-knowledge or social adaptability outside of the pitch."

Oh my heart! I love him: "the implicit "mostly staring and drooling" being perhaps his largest downfall besides his complete lack of self-awareness." When can we be married?

"like perhaps he wanted to harvest some more cabbage for the flobberworms..."/They met each others' gaze. /"That's too practical," they said at the same time" I have never read a story like this, and I love it. This whole we're-friends-because-we're-worried-about-someone-we-love is not an idea I'm unused to, but using two characters who should, because of their backgrounds, hate each other makes it so much nicer. I love it so much.

Ahehehe: "You can't just go wandering into the night, you little twit!" That curse isn't used enough in everyday life. I think I shall bring it back (Julia won't know what's hit her...).

And again, ahehehe: "I meant to hit the cat, not you. Er Petrificus totalus!"/Neville fell backwards onto the ground. He still couldn't move./"Really?" I can just see it now, and this is a most glorious and hilarious image in my head.

Nothing but pure love remains anymore: "It's too late for that." Hugo stared seriously at Neville and Scorpius, his large eyes bouncing between their faces. "That train has sailed." Such a simple sentence, but it describes Hugo's personality /perfectly/. He is, and always will be, completely perfect, and a complete twit.

Wow. I'd never thought of it like this: "He might, Neville imagined, become tired of the comparative banality of social life at Hogwarts when his parents and his parents' closest friends had all been a part of something so significant in their time. That might explain Hugo's disinterest in interacting with his peers, so few of whom were as closely linked to the exciting past as he was himself, having parents like his." You amaze me with how deep you can go. I just thought Hugo was a bit...you know, ditsy because that was the way he was. I never thought that it was because he was comparing it to what his parents had experienced at school. Your insights here are so fantastic and mind-blowing. Thank you.

OH HUGO! "Something pulled his vision downwards, and he looked very intently at the runes that Hugo had traced into the dirt./I am smart." You have no idea what you have done to me with those three words. You - I - Hugo - aha;bewf;bnwk'mvkm. So beautiful. I also rather love that way that Scorpius follows Hugo into the forest without questions. That is true friendship.

Lily, this is so beautiful and lovely and I apologise once more for taking forever in reviewing :( but I love this too much now and don't want to stop reading. However, I need to leave BUT I WILL BE BACK FOR MY BABY HUGO TOMORROW. OKAY? COOL.

This is wonderful, just in case you didn't get that from my long reviews :)

 Report Review

Review #2, by julianna ls 

25th March 2012:
Good . I take it back:-) that about Hugo .

Author's Response: hi! i haven't actually read this in a while so i'm not quite sure what you're referring to, exactly, but...good?! i'm going to take it as good :P

thanks again for the review :)

 Report Review

Review #3, by FoundriaPenguin 

25th December 2011:

HUGO IS SMART BUT HE FAILS ALL HIS CLASSES ON PURPOSE. WHY. :( I knew it -- well, I didn't know it, but figuring he is Hermione's son he's got to have loads of her brains and natural talent in him. :D But he is FINDING HIMSELF! COMING OF AGE, IN A SENSE! I love these types of stories.

SO MY PREMONITIONS WERE RIGHT? Neville sees some of himself in Hugo? Because he says "he wasn't sure he'd felt it for a very long time." That is so awesome. And then when Scorpius says, "What, you fail them on purpose?" about the classes...MY HEART WENT OUT TO THEM BOTH. BIG BROTHER SCORPIUS. AW. Plus, Flitwick is so laid-back, I love it.

I love it all..so I cannot help but continue! ek :)


Author's Response: YES IT'S A COMMUNING OF THE BROS. They're like their own little stupid fraternity and their version of partying is running through the Forbidden Forest at night when all the creatures come out to sharpen their teeth on metal tree bark etc. Because there are metal trees in this Forest, yah.

Yeah. Basically any offspring is going to be capable of smartness. In a way Hugo is really mysterious and disjointed. Like, he shouldn't be smart enough to be able to know he's smart but he just doesn't try because he doesn't want to be his parent's kid only, though they're dear to him...and drool. But, hey, THIS IS A STORY and whatever, he is definitely coming of age :P

YEP YEP. You are basically a seer! Neville basically uses (for lack of a better word) Hugo's experience to come to terms with his childhood, too. Scorpius really rises to the challenge of a friendship with Hugo rather nicely, considering at first he kind of looked at him a bit condescendingly.

HEE THANK YOUUU (heart heart)

 Report Review

Review #4, by dirtydeedsdonedirtcheap 

4th December 2011:
Let the herbology adventure begin! I'm so excited! I have to say, I don't think I've ever been this excited to read a fan fiction like this before, I always shy away from adventure fics for some reason. I usually like really obvious, slapstick humor but this is real humor. Smart humor!

Author's Response: the more reviews i get for this story the more amazed i am that it's gotten such a great reception, but it kind of makes me wish that somebody else had written it so I could read it for the first time, without already sort of knowing what was going to happen.

haha and thank you :) i always take compliments on my stories' humor as compliments on my own sense of humor, since in this case especially, i think this is hilarious.

thanks as always for the review :)

 Report Review

Review #5, by AC_rules 

6th November 2011:
Its such a pleasure to come back and review this next chapter. I'm a terrible reviewer, otherwise I would have been back sooner because I love this story and I loved your authors response!

I love Flitwick and the idea that all teachers at Hogwarts have that sort of ethos - I certainly think all that could be done wasn't done to catch Harry/Fred/George/generall Hogwartian rascals.

Hugo's logical is quite beautiful and this is still so so so so funny. Not subtle humour at all, but big fat humour humour.

The idea that there all going to head off on a little herbology adventures its just wonderful. I've read a few chapters ahead of this (but not finished) and I love the whole darn thing.

This story just wins at life.


Author's Response: HELLO! sorry it's taken me a couple days to respond, life has gotten a bit crazy!

Also, as far as I'm concerned, anybody who actually /reviews/ is not a bad reviewer. You get auto-points just for taking time to tell me what you think! WOOP.

You have exactly the idea I do, which makes sense as that's what you're saying, but er, well, I just have that feeling too--the professors probably knew who was breaking what rules and were just like LOL NOPE CAN'T BE BOTHERED.

Glad you're appreciating Hugo-Logic. I feel that can be a proper noun, it's so weird and not logic at all that it deserves its own subcat. And yes, I see it as pretty in-your-face humor as well :)

I'm so glad you're enjoying the story! I say it pretty much every time but I'm so surprised and happy every time someone tells me so :)

thanks so much for the review !

 Report Review

Review #6, by Toujours Padfoot 

17th October 2011:

I cannot believe it took me this long to get to chapter three. I am a miserable excuse of a human being. BUT GUESS WHAT, I AM GOING TO STAY UP SUPER LATE READING THIS STORY BECAUSE HELLO, THIS IS WHY COFFEE WAS INVENTED. For the purposes of this fic, ofc.

The characterization of Scorpius is extremely refreshing - he's so concerned, so responsible, so reasonable. In the back of his mind he must be tallying brownie points that this is adding up in Rose's book, but mostly he has a genuine interest in Hugo's welfare. I love that he and Neville both have this inexplicable gravitational pull towards the boy, telling him yes when they should be saying no, and that neither one of them quite understand it. An unlikely trio, but it's just this powerful lightbulb moment when you read a story where the characters are so perfectly suited for one another.

I am very excited to continue. QUIDROPOPOT FTW.


no, no! hugo and scorp-o and nev-o are here to wait for you always!!

scorpius is probably definitely scheming of ways he can use this in his favor, although at the time all that occurred to him consciously was to be worried she'd be super mad when he got back.

i am glad you are having the lightbulb moment--for me even it didn't happen for a few more chapters while i was writing.


 Report Review

Review #7, by TenthWeasley 

4th October 2011:
I am going to be very honest. I love to laugh, and I like to think that I have a generally broad and well-defined sense of humour. That being said, it takes a lot to get a chuckle out of me - not because something isn't funny, but it's really /got/ to be funny for me to actually express it.

This chapter didn't get chuckles - it got laughs.

I love everything about this story, everything. Hugo's drooly, slurpy, wink-peppered self (bless the boy) and Neville's very in-canon sense of slight confusion about everything. And Flitwick! You worked wonders with Flitwick, he was brilliant. All beaming and jovial. :D

Hugo is definitely my favorite character so far, but one thing that really impresses me is the view you're taking of Scorpius. He's not some smug, arrogant kid with an undefined and yet strong hatred for anything Weasley. He's a normal boy, with normal friends, and he is NORMAL. In case you didn't catch that. And I am very, very tired of smug, arrogant, Draco-clone Scorpius. You're writing him marvelously, and each further sentence he's mentioned in leaves me more and more impressed.

Dear Hugo and his determination to locate the Quidropopot. I love that boy to pieces. He is FANTASTIC. And I loved the bit about the runes, too. It shows a new side of him, and I loved seeing multiple Hugos, all rolled into one.

And while I'm at it - the slapstick? /Brilliant/. I choked on my water when the cat landed on Neville's head. :D That was VERY Wodehouse and I am eternally jealous of this entire story, period. One of the most amazing next gen stories I have ever read.

GAHH. SO GOOD. ♥ I am in perpetual awe.


In a public place! And I don't even care that people are staring at me funny.


Jane-laughs are the jewels of the fic-humor world! While I was writing this chapter actually I was cackling a little bit crazily as I decided it was a cat after all. At first it was going to be a werewolf, truth be told, in the very smallest consciousness of my subconscious, if that makes sense. But then I thought that that would be a little cray for the first night in the woods; plus, we haven't discovered at this point that Hugo is a ball of mysteries and I like the way of finding out real-life style :)))

Scorpius--yeah, I think at first I was taking him into neutral territory because he was meant to be more of an insight into Hugo than anything else--as the story progressed I unintentionally made him more moody and stuff but I think not to the extent that it's all OMG I HATE YOU DRACO or anything like that. I did have a clear idea of him at this point, though. I wanted him to be, as you say, normal as someone who is the son of draco malfoy is able to be.

I like the idea in general that people are more than one person all rolled into one :D

Wodehouse is such a giant inspiration for these early chapters--glad you're recognizing that and enjoying the story (h) (h)

 Report Review

Review #8, by thelandbeforecookies 

7th July 2011:
I am smart

AWWW HUGO, you are adorable! I loved that he wrote in Ancient Runes and "I do pay attention in class" AWW TIMES A BILLION

What a team: Scorpius, Neville and Hugo! LOVE. IT. oh, and Flitwick! Snerk. He's so calm, and cheery, and I'm just wondering if going slightly mad comes with the position of Headmaster.

UGHH this chapter was so sweet and delightful and a whole other bunch of adjectives that make me feel like I'm in a Disney film. Bangin' job, dude, fo reals.

Author's Response: yes, i think you have to be a little cray cray to be headmaster. i didn't want him to be too dumbledore-crazy, and i needed neville to launch into 'action' (hehhh) so i made him annoying crazy...but i still like him :)

i'm taking adjectives indicative of a disney film to be a very precious compliment. thank you for all your reviews!

 Report Review

Review #9, by WitnesstoitAll 

7th June 2011:
I am Smart.

Oh me oh my. Expelliarmus. Hugo. Love. There was something so intangibly sweet about this entire chapter, I'm not even going to try and describe it because, well, babbling is about all I could manage. Neville is the most perfect professor ever. I'm jealous. I want him to be my teacher.

Another fabulous chapter.

Author's Response: awww i didn't know how everyone else with good stories would take this chapter. it sort of borders on treacly, but i'm very glad that i've managed to write a neville who makes you wish he were your professor. it's very ego-boosting. watch out, world, i'm coming and you might not fit around my puffed up head :D

 Report Review

Review #10, by music_is_inside_of_me 

1st May 2011:
So another great chapter! I like how you develop your characters along the way, very smoothly. Your writing is beautiful and flawless.

One thing though-it's kinda hard to read. I like how you go into extreme detail about everything but that can be tedious to read.

Good chapter though!

Author's Response: oooh thank you for the review! and thank you for the wonderful compliments :)
i would definitely agree with you about the hard to read. i think for the first four or so chapters, which is probably longer than it should take, i was trying to establish the tone, sooo it was a little messy. i plan on doing a revamp of all the chapters when i'm done updating it (soon, soon hopefully!), and i will take your comments into consideration!
thanks so much for the review :)

 Report Review

Review #11, by _maomao 

19th April 2011:
Hugo is special! So he has a special ability?
Hmmm... He's like the Neville of his generation, and we know Neville showed his true strengths in the end. I see how Neville still acts like his younger self too; like when he was with Flitwick.

Good chapter!

Author's Response: muhahahhahahah i won't say what hugo has... ;)
yes, i love Neville, and i think (gulp, i'm writing this i should know heh...heh) that part of why Neville is drawn to hugo is because he can see some of himself in the lad :D
heheh oh flitwick. so darn chipper!
thanks so much for the review, dear! :)

 Report Review

Review #12, by orderofthephoenix 

22nd March 2011:
Hey Lily! Next chapter! :D

Another brilliant chapter! I love how you make the characters interact with each other, the way I've never seen anyone else do!

You've written the contrasting moods of Neville & Flitwick really well. I can understand Neville being really worried and concerned about Hugo but I would've thought Flitwick would've been a little more concerned. You know, as he's the Headmaster. I do like how you kept him cheerful though, because that's how I've always imagined him to be. :) So i'm very happy about that! :P

The sentence starting with: 'And unfortunate Hugo, born in the wrong epoch', is an example of those beautiful lists you love so much ^^ It worked really well; I loved it! :)

I laughed at Scorpius' attempts to get the cat off Neville. He failed twice before finally getting it right! :P

I also liked how Neville thought of Ron, Harry and Hermione when he was thrying to convince himself why he was agreeing with Hugo. Even though he didn't really understand why himself!

You amaze me everytime I read your writing :)


-Sophia xx

Author's Response: HIII!!!
i'm so happy to hear you say all of these wonderful things, i'm not even sure i can respond to each thing because it'd all just look like:
I will say though, that i'm glad you're laughing at the characters and it isn't just me who thinks they're funny :) they just kind of get a life of their own and surprise me sometimes!
*hugs back* it means a lot to me to see the word "amaze" in a review, and more so that it's actually ME doing the amazing! i'm very grateful for all your feedback, thank you so much for the wonderful reviews! :)

 Report Review

Review #13, by hpgrl 

18th March 2011:
hi lily!

Okay, so what I love about this story is how it seems so unconventional - when I read the summary about it being a Hugo, Neville, Scorpius adventure, I had my doubts- but you make it seem like it was the inevitable course of action, and you write it so convincingly. I absolutely love your Hugo! Hugo is already my favorite next-gen character (he's dubbed 'the Watermelon' - just thought you ought to know) so seeing him so seemingly helpless and human, yet so determined and intelligent (at times lol!) makes me want to hug him- while trying to keep my distance from his...ah, drool.

I also love scorpius' character, and Neville is just how I imagined him. I love that one paragraph you had in this chapter about Neville putting himself in Hugo's shoes and justifying Hugo's actions. Very cool. I also enjoyed your style of writing here, although, at times I felt that some sentences were so intricate- it was hard to get a straight meaning out of them, and it kind of disrupted the flow of the paragraph they were in- but those were few and far between.

Great job overall! must continue to the next chapter.

Author's Response: hi jade! *waves*
Aw i am so thankful to have such a lovely review from you! And sorry about those naughty sentences, sometimes my words get the better of me and make no sense :(
The Watermelon--ah--I would ask, but I'm a little nervous about that, haha :)
It's really, really--hm, what's the word--AMAZING to hear you say that Neville is how you imagined him! I love Neville and try to keep him canon, so it means a lot to hear this! I'm glad you like Scorpius, too, I was having trouble giving him a distinct personality!
thank you so much for the review! i'm really surprised this story is getting so many positive responses :) i didn't format my last chapter right so it will be a little while longer before the newest chapter comes out, but it is on the way!! :)

 Report Review

Review #14, by silverstarletworld89 

17th March 2011:
:-O The plot is thickening. Hugo, Neville and Scorpius; Man What a trio!!! Awww poor Hugo, so misunderstood. I must go read more!!!

Author's Response: haha that's what i thought! ragtag teams are the best, though :) i'll say though that Hugo could do a lot to improve his own appearance though ;) yay!! :)
thanks again!!

 Report Review

Review #15, by justonemorefic 

13th March 2011:
Baw more Rose/Scor cute. I'm not a shipper in particular, but you make them not annoying and normal and I like that :D

SNERK Oh Flitwick. I've always adored you. "You must know that students are constantly stealing from the house elves who live to serve them!" So nonchalant. Wizard logic in general, really. (Totally loving use of the word jocular)

NEVILLE. I still adore you. "Neville cringed at the fib, and corrected himself." Classic Neville.

"Perhaps his mind was set up for the cavemen days, Scorpius mused, where the outside tackle of a wooly mammoth alone and more than anything would ensure survival. And unfortunate Hugo, born in the wrong epoch, was unarmoured against the derisive world of postpubescent drama and culture, satisfied where the average fifteen-year-old would die of horror to be, living in a world of spit puddles and gawky, wink-peppered stares. Yes, Scorpius worried for Hugo." THIS ENTIRE PARAGRAPH. It's so smart and so good and SO SMART (I had to say that twice) and this is like the SOUL of Hugo right here. Caveman! Postpubescent drama! Spit puddles! Love love love.

"'That's too practical,' they said at the same time" SNERK OUT LOUD.



OOOH. My. Oh my. I love this development. I have a special place in my heart for characters who knowingly act smart. I love that he wrote in Runes, and that one bit about Scorpius feeling like he was in a play.

Author's Response: I'm so glad, let me say, first of all that the Rose/Scorp is not too annoying for you :) I love them, personally, but i understand that they can be portrayed annoyingly sometimes :)
I really played up Flitwick here, but I have a tendency towards the ridiculous, so...just sort of happened :)
hahahah i was actually cackling out loud reading that paragraph you put in here--although i wrote it, so i don't know what's wrong with me! but really, it's so, so hugo. scorpius is just really intuitive :P
the thing afoot is afoot! (er, if that makes sense!) although i don't think i fully explain till much later, so don't be sad if you don't know right away! O.O
i also love making characters this way, i'm glad i've found a fellow--uhm, appreciator!! hehe
thanks so much for the review! like i said, really amusing, but also encouraging :)

 Report Review

Review #16, by Ellerina 

17th February 2011:
Bahahaha, what a ragtag team. Professor Neville, Scorpius and Hugo.

Seriously though, I am in love with Hugo. Not like, OMG I WANT TO DATE HIM FO REALSIES. It's more like, OOO he's so... enigmatic. I must figure him out! This sort of persuasive thing he's got going... and those runes in the dirt. Hmmm, there must be more to him that meets the eye.

And the fact that he's going to all this trouble for a GIRL. Haha, he would. What a silly, silly teenage boy. He couldn't just wear the suit and talk about cartoon characters, no. He has to go find the impossible-to-find magical plant in the FORBIDDEN FORREST, in the middle of the NIGHT, and drag Neville and Scorpius with him. Now that is a walking *facepalm* right there, am I right?

Again, your depiction of the professors was perfect and had me in stitches. Flitwick, hahahaha, it's like the Headmaster position MAKES you crazy or something.

Come on, Neville, you must know that students are constantly stealing from the house elves who live to serve them! A lovely little jibe at all those fanfic cliches. Not sure if it was intended, but it made me laugh either way.

A boy with a seemingly unnatural ability to play and strategise in Quidditch but who lacked any self-knowledge or social adaptability outside of the pitch. Ron's son through and through, isn't he? poor boy...

"That's too practical," they said at the same time... This whole Neville and Scorpius talking at the same time shtick was so funny! And yes, MUCH too practical for dear ole Hugo...

Well, at least Hugo isn't galavanting off in the Forbidden Forest alone? Maybe? Possibly?


Author's Response: I loved the idea of joining what seemed to be a--you have the word that I used to myself when writing the plot--ragtag team out on an impossible mission. Hugo came to me because I thought that I could exaggerate Ron pretty well, and Neville's one of my favourites, and then Scorpius...well, if you can't tell from my set on the forums, I sort of like him a lot, so he had to be there. (I like my version of him; some other ones, but mostly mine.)
Yep. *grins* Thought that that was pretty teenage-boy-ish. Course being a girl it's often hard to draw the line between humorous and ridiculous, but I didn't worry about that too much here. It's Hogwarts, for Merlin's sake, all kind of crazy stuff goes down at Hogwarts.
I agree, I think you have to be, if not certifiably, at least seemingly gaga to be headmaster. Just a requisite. Flitwick's generally so likable, so I decided to make it weird by exaggerating the cheer :)
Hehe I definitely did this one on purpose. Hoping it doesn't hurt too many feelings, but I feel like it's a go-to plot when writers are looking for adventure. I'm sort of against go-to plots.
Hehe thanks so much for the review! You've really made my day with these :)

 Report Review

Review #17, by NeverGotHerLetter 

11th February 2011:
Last review!
Ah Ok, so now I see that Rose and Scorp are at least friends, which gives that connection that's needed. Perhaps you could mention it in the previous chapter though, just to make it more clear? Of course, it's up to you though, I'm only giving advice :)
So on to the plot in this chapter. I really liked it! I love that you made Flitwick Headmaster, and his happy-go-lucky mannerisms and aura are completely canon which is great (I'm a strict canon-er... No Dramione for me!!). I'm also liking your Scorpius. It's clear that he's not in Gryffindor, but what house is he in? I think you need to make this more clear because if you mentioned it, then I didn't pick up on it. But yes, his characterisation is great, as he's not annoyingly like Draco which is fantastic because personally I think he would have been surprisingly UNLIKE Draco, and more like his mother, Astoria (who I'm assuming was a lovely person) :D
Neville is great as always, and I really like the issue you brought up about Hugo being smart and wanting to prove himself, i think that's really great. I'm getting the dark feeling about Hugo in this last bit when Neville and Scorp find him in the Forest. Has something happened to him? He seems a little... off if you know what I mean... Hmmm...
I really like this story so well done! If you'd like me to review the next few chapters when they come up, then don't hesitate to re post on my review thread, I'd be happy to see you there! This last chapter is a 9/10.
~NeverGotHerLetter x x x x x x

Author's Response: Thank you again!
Okay, I'll spend some time on Scorpius.
He actually is in Gryffindor, and he and Rose are dating. I also imagine him to take after his mother--again, I go into this later :) I've mentioned this in coming chapters, because they come more into play there. However, I might go back and edit the details in (I thought that I did mention a bit from Hugo's point of view about Scorpius thinking Rose was the prettiest girl in the world or something similar--perhaps it wasn't clear enough though), because I don't want wondering about Scorpius's role to be a major distraction. I'll try to look back and see where I could mention his "red and gold" tie or something :P
I'm glad that you're picking up on Hugo needing to prove himself. That's the major driving force of this story, and it'd be bad if it wasn't coming through! I won't say that much here, but don't worry too much about Hugo!! :)
Thanks soo so much for the reviews; they're lovely and helpful, and I appreciate that time you've taken to help me out!

 Report Review

Review #18, by maskedmuggle 

4th February 2011:
Wow! This is such a great chapter!
Eek - sorry it took me so long to read the third chapter; I really loved the first 2, but then school took over and I'm kinda lazy.. kinda needed the push in the review battle to send me over here; though I would've read it eventually :P

ANYWAY! As I've said before, I just love your Hugo! I simply LOVE that you haven't stuck to the typical cliche-ish Hugo, but given him this whole other personality I never would have expected! I thought the Rose/Scorpius bit was cute. Rose seems nice, even though she's a minor character (in this chapter). Having Scorpius in the scene seemed a bit weird, but he did add to the story very well :)

Brilliant writing! I love the plot so far, I'm very intrigued into what exactly Hugo is up to, and whether the Quidropopot will be there or not :P Great story - hope you update soon :)

Author's Response: Hello again! :)
Not to worry, not at all! I understand that real life often interferes with our plans :)
I'm so pleased that you like the way I've portrayed Hugo!!! I really haven't read any other fics of him, so I'm not sure what his stereotypical characterization would be, but at any rate I'm glad I seem to be far from it! I'm a giant fan of the Rose/Scorp relationship :)
I know it's an odd grouping of characters (what with Scorpius, Neville and Hugo), but I thought a lot about who would accompany Hugo on his "rite-of-passage"-ish journey and decided that he and Prof. Longbottom were the best candidates :) He will come more into play in the coming chapters, I promise, and perhaps it will make more sense as to his involvement--why he fit the bill.
I take pains to add a little character to the language, I'm glad it's working ;) Your questions will be answered! I finished the complete outline the other day and I've figured on this story becoming around 8-9 chapters...I hope to keep updating in a semi-orderly fashion :)
Thanks so much for the review! Lovely to hear from you :)

 Report Review

Review #19, by TheProphecy 

4th February 2011:

Well generally i think it's a good story. I like the idea and i think that last chapter was very good. I was starting to get quite involved in the story.

I like Neville, i think you have done him very well as a character. I also like scorpius although maybe some more development with him?

Hugo, well at first i didn't like how you wrote him at all. But now i see that there was a purpose to it and i'm starting to be quite engaged with his character and how he's expanding. I actually thought he seemed like and over-exaggerated Ron which i guess is good :).

I think your writing style is good and precise and there weren't any grammar issues i spotted.

I like the general idea and overall i think it is a good story. Keep it up. :)


Author's Response: Hi there! Thanks so much for the review :)
I'm spending a bit of time in the next chapter explaining more of where Scorpius is coming from -- my idea of him is pretty different than normal I believe -- I've actually gotten a few more chapters written than appear here, validation is slow right now so I have to choose carefully what I want to put up and I've got a few challenges that need to be posted first, but then I'll be updating away!
It's good to hear that you thought he needs a little more development though, I didn't really know that he was a sort of ambiguous character at this point. I'll go back and read and see if I should change it yet or go with what I've already got written in chapter 4 :)
Yes, I'm looking at this character of Hugo as more of a character in a play--going from extremes :) I think in a short story you really have to pound the ideas out and be pretty direct about them, so Hugo might seem a little too large for life but I like him (maybe I'm a little too fond of my characters...) :)
Neville is one of my favorite characters ever so I try to incorporate him wherever I can--I love writing from his perspective !
Thanks for taking time to help me!! Really appreciate it :)

 Report Review

Review #20, by Lunaria 

26th January 2011:
This is a really interesting story. I'm looking forward to whatever is in store! I really want to get down to the core of Hugo's character. He seems so interesting underneath the surface.

Author's Response: Thank you! I'm glad I'm getting across that Hugo really isn't such a complete dolt but has a little potential, even if he doesn't realise it yet :)
I've got some wonderful ideas in store, let's hope I'm able to translate them well !
Thanks for the review, I appreciate your time !

 Report Review
If this is your story and you wish to respond to reviews, please login
Add a Review