21 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Noblevyne 

1st July 2011:
Just. So. Good.

Thank you for writing something I've had trouble picturing, so perfectly. You've managed to capture their youth and their courage all at once. Even if Lily hasn't shown it yet in quite the same way as James.

You really have made Lily into this fully realised and fleshed out character - she's not just the heroine who died for her child, she's so much more and that makes her future that much more tragic, because she's so human.

Author's Response: That first line kind of made me want to dance with joy. And then I read the rest of the review, and...well, maybe I did dance a little bit, for real. :D

You pretty much captured what I realized about Lily as I was writing this chapter: she's not the person who sacrificed herself...yet. She will be one day, and she's part of that person already, but she's got a lot of strife and changes ahead of her. She's brave, maybe not in the same way as James yet, but they're both young, and they'll get there.

Which...kind of sucks. Because, of course, "getting there" means dying. :/

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Review #2, by Leigh Kelley 

18th June 2011:
Sigh. You know something? Lily acted really human. If it were me, and this is sad to say, I'd probably have been just as selfish. Your life or someone else's is... I don't know. There's not many people that can be selfless. It's human. She's human. She does redeem herself some by causing the commotion though. And there is the fact that she grabbed a hold of him during the Apparation when she could have easily stayed behind and tried to make contact with Dumbledore some other way. She didn't, and those are points for her in my book. She was a character one could relate with in this chapter, so I can't be mad that she didn't show the bravery she did when pleading with Voldemort to kill her instead of Harry. She loves him. While she may not have shown it in a way he would have liked, she loves him, or she wouldn't have ran back to the park.

Aside from that, this was another well-done chapter (bah, sounds like I'm talking about steak, but your story's just as juicy, so, haha).

I'm moving to the last chapter now. Sad to see the story's just about done.


Author's Response: YES. Yes, yes, yes. This review makes me so happy. I feel exactly the same way--not that I would never sacrifice myself for someone else, but Lily has been dating James for a couple of months at this point. Would I sacrifice myself, without hesitation, for James, if I were in her position? Definitely not without hesitation. For what it's worth, I do think that if James had been left there, Lily would have ended up regretting it immensely, and she probably would have tried to go back to help him or something. But in that moment, when someone's threatening to kill you, I think it would be very hard to think completely selflessly.

Plus, as you pointed out, if Lily truly hadn't cared, she wouldn't have been in that situation in the first place. I am SO HAPPY that you liked this chapter, and you got my intention in it--not that I'm surprised. Sometimes I seriously feel like I'm talking to myself when I reply to your reviews, just because you're so in tune with what I'm thinking on any given chapter. :P

Thank you!

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Review #3, by doglover 

9th January 2011:
oh gosh james and lily have problems now.

Author's Response: Yes, this incident really brought out some issues for them. (I think the issues were there before, just not as front-and-centre as this made them.)

On the plus side, I guess you at least know they work them out eventually, right? :)

Thanks again!

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Review #4, by AlPadfootPotter96 

28th December 2010:
Stunning! This chapter had me at the edge of my seat the whole time :).

Author's Response: Yay! Again, I'm so happy that I managed to achieve the effect that I wanted. I usually don't do so fantastic with writing action-y type scenes, so I'm thrilled that I wrote this one well!

Thanks again!

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Review #5, by Prongs and Lils 

1st November 2010:
OMG! Loved this chapter...I thought that you did a very good job in writing it! I must say that Lily's moment of self-preservation was unexpected but I can't wait to find out what happens next :)

Author's Response: Yay, I'm so glad to hear you loved this chapter! It was obviously one of the biggest chapters in the story and very much a challenge for me to write--fun to write, though, for sure! :)

Lily's reaction was certainly something I didn't plan on having happen that way, but as I was writing it, I just couldn't see it going any other way. It made more sense to me to have her react like this--I felt like it was more human and realistic. :)

Thanks for the review!

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Review #6, by girly1393 

9th September 2010:
...Wow. That was...Wow.

That was intense.

James has found he truly loves Lily, and, you know, I think it was done wonderfully.

Bravo to you.

Author's Response: Once again, I'm happy to hear you thought it was "intense"...and even more so that you thought it was wonderful!

I'm kind of just so happy after reading all these reviews over again that I don't quite know what to say...except thank you, again and again!

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Review #7, by anonymous 

18th July 2010:
You know, I liked this fanfic until this chapter. How could you have made Lily so weak?

Author's Response: Well, hi there! I'm very pleased to hear that you liked the majority of the story. I knew that the decision I made to characterize Lily like I did in this chapter was going to make some people scratch their heads or dismiss me as mental, so I understand where you're coming from completely. Let me just get comfortable, because I'll give you the most complete answer that I think I've ever given any reviewer of this chapter. :)

Part of the decision to characterize Lily that way, in that particular moment, was instinctual. When I went into writing the chapter, I fully intended to have Lily be very brave and self-sacrificing. But then I got to that part of the chapter, and I just couldn't do it. It was honestly like Lily had popped out of my computer screen and said, "No, I'm not going to do that, sorry." It was one of the strongest instincts I've ever experienced when writing, and I just knew that I couldn't write her the way I had planned originally.

I did also put some thought into it, though. For one thing, I considered how horrible and frightening it would be to actually have your life threatened. I can't begin to fully imagine how awful that would be, or what it would do to a person, but one thing I feel certain is that it would make most people pretty desperate to do ANYTHING that they could to save themselves. No, Lily is not being particularly brave in this scene. But is she having what would be a pretty common reaction to her situation? I think so.

I also considered what was actually at stake in the scene. One of the things I knew would put people off about her acting this way is that it's in conflict with the way she sacrifices herself for Harry so bravely. But the Lily that did that wasn't fresh out of Hogwarts, wasn't 18 years old, wasn't being offered a situation where both she and her loved one could live. She was a wife and a mother, and she had been through years of fighting and fleeing Voldemort and the Death Eaters. I think that Lily as you see her in this chapter--who IS fresh out of Hogwarts, is 18, is being offered both her own life and James', is neither wife nor mother (in fact, has only been dating James for a few months), and is not yet a part of the Order--would have probably reacted somewhat differently to having her life threatened. No loving mother would ever allow their child to be killed if they could help it, so while Lily's sacrifice is a wonderful one, it's almost unremarkable when you consider it in that sense. Many mothers would have done the very same thing.

However, we DO know that Lily was immensely brave, because Harry is constantly told that in the books. And I do think she's brave--it's just that this chapter puts her in a very extreme situation, the likes of which she had never been faced with before. She did, after all, go back to the park to try and help James. She didn't run away when she saw that he was being attacked. And I do think that I mentioned in the next chapter that she had figured that (if not, it's in the sequel), since James' life was not being threatened, she would be able to escape and go get help. She wasn't being a complete coward, but she was very afraid and trying to do what made sense to her in the moment.

And the final thing that made this way of portraying her seem better compared to what might be deemed "typical" was that I thought it provided the opportunity for some character development. She's going to go through a lot in the next few years that will make her much tougher, and I thought it would be less interesting and less realistic if she was tough-as-nails from the get-go.

Anyway, that's why I did what I did. It's okay if you still think I made a mistake, though I do wish it hadn't ruined the entire story for you. I hope my explanation at least makes sense, even if you don't agree with it. And, like I said, I'm glad you enjoyed most of the story.

Thank you for your review!

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Review #8, by Flower n Prongs 

13th July 2010:
First off, I'm amazed at how much little canon tidbits made their way into your novel. I'm quite impressed. =) I'm in the pre-writing stages for my own Marauder fic, and I'm realizing just how complicated sticking to canon and my plot line may end up being.

Secondly, I loved this chapter. It was one of my favourites of the entire novel. There were a couple of seconds where I actually doubted things that I knew to be true/had to happen because of the books. All in all, excellent job. I can't wait to read the final chapter and see how this wraps up. =)

Author's Response: Well, thank you! Sticking to canon is definitely something that's important to me. I'm sure I deviated in places or left things out, but it's always nice to hear that people liked the fact that I included little details from canon. :)

Marauders-Era stories are kind of deceptively complicated, I think. On the one hand, we don't know much about the characters' backgrounds or the events that happened during their lives, which gives us a lot of freedom to fill in the blank spaces. But the difficult part--or at least what I think is difficult--is making whatever you fill those in with realistic and plausible. That encompasses everything from trying to keep speech and culture period-appropriate to just trying to figure out solid characterizations for the main characters. That was (and is) really hard for me. In terms of facts, I find that everything that happened after Lily and James and co. left school and joined the Order is a bit more tricky to map out!

You know, I really enjoyed writing this chapter--probably because I'd been imagining it in my head for so long--and it's just that much more rewarding to hear that you really loved it. And the fact that I actually made you think something totally unexpected was going to happen (I assume you meant that you wondered if James was maybe going to get forced into joining the Death Eaters, or something similar) really makes me feel good. :) That's one thing about this kind of story: everyone pretty much knows what's going to happen, so it's very hard to keep people in a state of total suspense. It's really refreshing and just great to hear that I kept you guessing for at least a couple seconds here or there!

Thanks again!

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Review #9, by Tonks101 

11th May 2010:
Wow!! Gets better as it goes!!

Author's Response: Hi there! Thanks so much for the review. I'm thrilled that you thought the chapter was good. :) These last couple were really important to me to get as right as I could.

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Review #10, by Jordan 

27th April 2010:
I've read the whole story and lovedit! I added it to my favorites! In fact, on a harry Potter board I almost gave a wrong answer because I yhught it was writen, not that I'm coplaining! I think you have a real gift for writing!

Author's Response: Wow, thanks so much for reading the entire story! I'm so glad that you loved it, and I'm flattered that you think I'm good at writing. :)

You know, sometimes I accidentally almost give the wrong answer on things, too, because I get so caught up in my own interpretations of the facts that they seem real to me. ;) So, we're in the same boat there! (Hopefully that was what you meant; if not, just ignore my babbling.)

Thank you so much for the review, and I hope you like the last chapter!

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Review #11, by ilovepadfootandprongs 

27th April 2010:
I love your story, how often do you update?

Author's Response: Hi there! I'm so happy to hear that you love the story. :)

As for updates, well, for the majority of this story, it's been as often as possible. Once a week is always my goal, though there have been times where I've failed that. Probably more to the point of your question, though, is when I'll be posting the next chapter. :) Considering I have a good portion of it written now, I think it shouldn't be longer than 2-3 days before it's up. That next one (chapter 33) will be the last one, at least for now. I'll be posting a sequel, probably starting at the beginning of June.

Hopefully that answers all you were wondering about! I hope you enjoy the last chapter of this particular story, and thank you so much for the review!

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Review #12, by Leila of the Fairies 

26th April 2010:
This is by far the most realistic depiction of a Marauders story I have ever come across. You've got me thoroughly addicted and I'm SO excited that there's going to be a sequel!

Author's Response: Hi! Thank you so much for the review. I'm so flattered that you think I've made this story realistic. Being realistic is probably THE most important thing to me with this story, so that's a giant compliment. :)

I'm so glad you're already looking forward to the sequel! Now, to just finish this off and get working on the next installment. :) I should have the final chapter of this one up in the next few days, and I hope you enjoy it!

Thanks again!

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Review #13, by _hedwig_ 

24th April 2010:
That's a great name for a chapter like that! I just think that maybe you could name it shadows of the dark not shadows in the dark because the death eaters are kind of shadows of the dark lord, following him everywhere and doing what he says. Just a suggestion.

Will there be another chapter or will this be the end, becuase if it is the end, then I'm going to just give you one big review right now:

I liked this story so much! I'm really glad you didnt turn Sirius into some sort of player, going out with girls left and right. I'm also very angry at Mary for being crazier then Luna Lovegood. You got all of the details right, which I'm appreciative of, becuase some get the books horribly, horribly wrong.

I liked the way this story was written, you used a carefully constucted way of being real in the magical world, if that's even possible. You made me want to read more and more, and sometimes even surprised me at what you wrote (in a good way, of course.)

Overall, 10/10!

Author's Response: Hi again! Wow, you really made short work of this. :) Thank you so much for leaving me so many reviews!

There IS another chapter! (I hope I actually did say that in the A/N and didn't just imagine doing it.) Good thinking on leaving your big review, though, just in case it wasn't. ;)

Chapter titles are really my most-hated part of updating. I always go to load the chapter in and then go, "Oh...I don't have a title!" And then I spend 10 - 15 minutes scouring through the chapter, trying to think of something that seems to fit. I chose "Shadows in the Dark" simply because it was mentioned a few times that both Lily and James felt like there were still people waiting to jump out at them from the shadows...and it was dark. Haha. Anyway, your chapter title could work equally well, and I'll think about it when I'm editing. If I don't change it, I may very well end up using that as inspiration for a future chapter title! (And I'll give credit where it's due, of course.)

Okay, on to your more generally comments. I'm so, so pleased that you enjoyed the story so much! Sirius's status as a "player" has never seemed plausible based on the facts in the books...and I'm big on book facts. :) Not to say that I never get them wrong or confused, but I do generally check up on things before including them in the story. I can completely appreciate being frustrated by people getting things from the books wrong. ;)

Hahaha, now THAT'S a comparison I've never made with Mary before..."crazier than Luna Lovegood". She's not a pleasant character--or at least she certainly didn't end up as one. I can say that I absolutely wouldn't want to be friends with someone like her (have unfortunately met people like her before, though), but at the same time, I still have some empathy for her, if only because she's a character that I essentially created--minus the name, of course.

I'm glad you liked how I wrote the story. I'm not sure if I would go so far as to say that I "carefully constructed" anything, but if that's the impression you got, then excellent! :P Sometimes I feel as if I'm a very disorganized writer, plot-wise. I'm also happy to hear that I managed to do a few unique things that you didn't expect; this plot line, has, after all, been done a zillion times, so if I found any way of making it fresh, I'm definitely satisfied with that. :)

Thank you again, and I hope you'll come back sometime next week to read the final chapter! (There will be a sequel, too, in case I didn't mention that before.)

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Review #14, by SeVeRuS LoVeR 

24th April 2010:
Oh wow yea I thought that there would have been no way that u could hav wraqpped tht up in one chapter but u fortunately proved me wrong tht was wrapped up very nicely! And I can't wait to read the ending and then. SQUEL haha :PP

Author's Response: Hi there! Thanks for another review. :)

I was actually doubting my own ability to wrap it all up in a short space, so you certainly weren't alone there! It's a big relief to know that you thought I did well with it. There's a little more explanation and closure in the final chapter, which I very much hope that you'll enjoy! :) I should have it up in the next 3 - 6 days.

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Review #15, by allie_0608 

24th April 2010:
This was so awesome! [:
Can't wait for more.

Author's Response: Hi Allie! I'm so glad that you enjoyed it, and thank you for letting me know what you thought. :)

I should have the last chapter up sometime mid-to-late next week, so check back for it then!

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Review #16, by C A L M 

24th April 2010:
Hi once again. This chapter was superb and I loved it as it was quite intense. I do recall JK saying that Voldemort did want James and Lily to join his side and they did decline. Pretty sure I read it in a book though can't remember which book, or perharps they put it into a movie :P. Look foward to the final chapter and the sequel. 10/10

Author's Response: Hello, Ashleigh! I'm so glad that you loved the chapter. :)

That's interesting that you might have read about it in a book...I was pretty sure that it had never been included in any of the HP books or the movies, but maybe it was in a book about HP not written by JK Rowling? Hmm. Either way, I'm glad you were familiar with it, because it probably made the events of the chapter a smoother read. :)

Thank you, and the final chapter should be up middle of or late next week!

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Review #17, by NATAliEisBAx14 

23rd April 2010:
So I have developed the real list of amazing things, it goes -4-14 because I couldn't do it in just ten slots.
-4 cancer
-3 STD
-2 pregnant
-1 kidnapped
0 not existing
1 being a murder suspect
2 getting hit in the face
3 being Voldemort
4 Neville Longbottom
5 Normal Person
6 Jason Bourne
7 Chuck Norris
8 Barack Obama
9 Will Smith
10 Optimus Prime
11 Lottery Winner
12 Marrying young Leonardo Dicaprio
13 Marrying Booth
14 Marrying Jack Dawson and looking like Megan Fox without the toe thumb.

There. You can find a slot to put this story in because it's definitely got a space on this list, at least above seven:) I mean trust me this is not STD or anything. ahah I've been asking people every day that I see how they feel on this scale. People are starting to mock me. I enjoy it though, they totally wish they were on this list.

I asked this one "know it all" "Smart ass" kid in my history class how he felt because he was bugging me about it and he said six so I said Jason bourne and he proceeded to ask me if this was before he got his memory back or not. Totally ruined the joke. I was like "Put the stick down Jeremy, the joke's dead, no need to keep poking it. I mean, at this point I need Dr. Brennan from Bones to examine the remains of this joke and tell me what it used to be. That's how dead it is." He stopped annoying me. He was wearing one color that day, just blue. That boy makes me want to punch a child.
I want to punch a baby when I'm around him. A BABY.
This story however saves that child from being punched by me, and I'm really sad there's only one chapter before you HIATUS yourself and begin another one.

:) Make sure you PM me when it starts because I want to be the very first reviewer for that story.
It would make me feel special.

Anyway, today I'm upset because Bones last night sucked and it's back to school on Monday. I hate school. More accurately I HATE spanish class. No. I seriously hate spanish. Like it's a -2 on the scale only because if I say it's a -3 or -4 I might actually get an STD or cancer and I don't want that.

That class kills my soul every day. For fifty minutes to an hour I die a little inside four out of the five school days.

Bones couldn't even make that class interesting. Harry Potter couldn't. It would take the Marauders teaching that class.

:) interesting thought. Maybe I'll imagine that next time.

anyway AMAZING.

Author's Response: Oh my goodness, your list is hilarious! Hahaha. I love that 0 = "not existing" (that's very mathematical of you), and 14 is just priceless. Hahahaha. I really don't know where the story fits in there; I mean, everything about 7 is pretty amazing, so what can I do? Hm...how about 10--because, for one thing, all the others above 7 are rich, which I'm not, and Optimus Prime is also fictional. Well, I hope so, at least. :P You must be the funniest person in real life! I think if I were in the same class as you, I would never have a dull moment. And I love that the kid in your class was wearing all blue. Do people really still dress in monochrome? I find that odd. But please don't let him bring you to violence--and if you need to come read some of this story to stop yourself, it'll still be here. :)

Yes, I am HIATUSING myself. Because frankly, I have about 3 plot points planned for the sequel, and I need to figure out how to string them all together in an interesting way. I have an amusing conversation between the Marauders imagined for the first or second chapter, though. And do you have a forum account that I can PM you on? I never knew you were a member over there! I'm on there pretty much all the time. :P I will absolutely PM you beforehand and tell you when I'm planning on posting the new chapter! That would be wonderful if you were the first reviewer.

Odias espanol? A mi me gusta la lengua. Hoy fui a la biblioteca y obeteni un libro en espanol...Harry Potter y la camara secreta. Yo voy a leerlo este verano. Muy fantastico, no? :P

Okay, sorry, couldn't resist. Anyway, the Marauders teaching a class...I believe that's a story idea! ;)

Thanks a fourteen (thanks a million, except using your scale), Natalie! Try to survive school. :P

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Review #18, by phoenixtear21 

23rd April 2010:
Nice chapter -- I absolutely love this story! I just found it recently and read all the chapters within a week because I just couldn't stop!

Lily and James are such a great chapter; I think that this chapter emphasized that especially. James was willing to become a Death Eater just so Lily could stay free...

You're a really great writer, and I can't wait for another chapter!


Author's Response: Hi again! Thanks for reviewing. :)

Wow, I'm so thrilled that you love the story that much! I think that getting close to the end has made me feel like everyone who's going to find the story and enjoy it already would have, but clearly I was wrong...which is fantastic!

Aaaah, Lily and James are quite wonderful together, aren't they? :) They're my favourite ship (kind of obvious, I guess, considering I wrote this whole giant story about them). And James is just...well, he's very loyal and extremely protective of the people he cares about, so he would really do just about anything for them, Lily included. I'm so glad you found in this chapter an affirmation of their feelings for each other--at first read, it may seem to be the opposite, but it's really not.

I should have the final chapter up in about a week's time, unless I get really crazy motivation and finish it before then--it is going to be shorter, so there's a small chance of it. :) Thanks again!

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Review #19, by saffy 

23rd April 2010:
Hi there :)

Wow another wonderful chapter. It was great to see lily's vulnerablity and her being frightened it seemed far more realsitic that way. I loved your description of her arrivign back at hogwarts and the relief of having someone else to take care of them.

James' characterisation was just perfect. The tension between him and lily is really interesting and im anxious to see how it pans out.

I feel your characters are never the stock one dimensional lily and james but so much more complex and so well written.

Thanks for a great read and cant wait for the next (last) chapter :)

Author's Response: Hi saffy! Great to hear from you again, as always. :)

I'm so glad you liked this chapter, especially when it came to Lily's actions. It's such a relief that it seemed realistic for her to act the way she did, because I was worried that people would think the opposite! Phew. I'm so pleased that you liked the tension between her and James, as well, because that was the other thing that I was concerned people would be upset about. :P

I thought it was kind of ironic that after all the thoughts about leaving Hogwarts forever in the last chapter, here they both were, back in the chapter following. It seemed to me that Hogwarts, especially with Dumbledore there, would feel like the safest and most familiar place for the two of them. I'm glad that you loved that description! :)

I'm so flattered that you think I've written Lily and James well, and made them complex characters. :) Characterization was and still is something that I think a lot about when I'm writing, so it's great to know that it pays off!

Next chapter should be up in a week! Thanks again for the review!

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Review #20, by applecrumble 

23rd April 2010:
*sigh* I love this story so much.

It's just so realistic. I don't normally like scenes which involve the death eaters because they come across as overly theatrical. But this is perfect! There was tension and I didn't feel like laughing!! You're a fantastic writer :)

I always found it fascinating that Voldemort wanted to recruit Lily and James so I'm really glad you included it in this story.

I love the way Lily behaves in the whole ordeal. I think people forget sometimes just how difficult a decision it is to sacrifice yourself. The instinct to stay alive is so powerful and if you're put in that situation you probably won't act as honourably as you would hope. James was given a direct choice, he either does what they say or they kill Lily. Lily's choice is a bit more vague and when you're panicking you don't necessarily do the right thing.
I love that it's her who acts this way, because of course she dies to protect Harry. I'm glad she wasn't such a martyr here, because it makes what she did for Harry more 'real' if that makes sense.

I also really like the fact that James can't fight the imperius curse off. He didn't get training like Harry did, and it makes this chapter more scary. The imperius curse always scared me more than any of the others so it was good to see a character not be able to throw it off.

My favourite bit was:
'This is some horrible dream, isn't it?' she asked. Her resolve was getting worn away with every passing moment.

It just really struck me how young they were and how terrifying it must have been in those times.

Only one chapter left? NOOO! I'm going to cry!

At least there's a sequel. I guess it'll be a lot more dark seeing as they'll join the order of the phoenix and have to defy Voldemort twice more. One question about the sequel, and you don't have to answer this, will it end with Lily and James' deaths? Will you have the scene where they die or finish before that?

Can't wait for the next chapter and sequel :)

Author's Response: Oh, thank you. :) I'm so thrilled that you love it, and that you came back to review!

I completely know what you mean about scenes with Death Eaters being theatrical, so that's a HUGE relief that this one didn't come off that way! :) They're certainly a hard group of characters to write without venturing into dramatics.

You are my favourite person for all those comments about Lily! :D I was worried that some people might think it was unrealistic, because we know she did make that sacrifice for Harry...but that three years on from where we are, and a lot of fighting and exposure to the war in that three years. This is the first time she's been put in this sort of danger, so of course she's going to be terrified. Maybe it's not very brave of me, but I think if I were put in her position, I would feel the same way. :/ Especially as they weren't threatening to kill James. (And I'm glad you linked this to her dying for Harry...I certainly had that in mind as I was writing the scene!)

I agree about the Imperius Curse--Harry was able to fight it off, but it was in a classroom where someone said, "I'm going to curse you, see if you can stop me." James had never experienced it before. Of course, I think it's still probably a sign of his capability to fight it off that he had those momentary breaks in consciousness and attempts to stop it so soon after being cursed--I would assume that some people would never even realize that they were under the curse. But at this point, he's not experienced enough to be able to fight it off properly.

Lily and James' age is something that I think gets forgotten all too often. (I partially blame the movies for giving us a visual image of them as older.) I'm so glad that I somehow managed to remind you of it, as it's always in the back of my mind as something that I want to reinforce. :)

As for the sequel--well, I should says sequels in the plural, as that's what it will be--I'm not entirely sure whether I'm going to write the scene where they die, but I certainly want to write up to and even past that point in time. I've had various ideas about epilogue scenes and endings over time, but I think it's one of those things that I'll have to work out as I build up to that point...but I couldn't imagine ending this story before their deaths. I may not actually go for writing the scene in Godric's Hollow, just because we know it in a lot of detail from DH, but I absolutely envision the story ending at a point after they're gone.

I should have the next chapter up in about a week again (ah, the bliss of having no homework), and then there'll be about a month before the sequel starts up. I'm glad you're excited for both, and thanks again for the review!

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Review #21, by redhead1287 

22nd April 2010:
I am really sad to hear that there is only one more chapter left!! The only thing that I am hoping in the last chapter is that Lily will get some confidence back and that she and James will make up and come back stronger after this. I just have to say, that I love James... I love him more and more... :)

I was slightly disappointed in Lily... but I think it made her more human... I never pictured her as not really wanting to be in the Order though. I would think that no matter what James is doing, she would want to fight. She is more of a gentle person though I guess. I don't think I would be satisfied with Lily joining the order just because James does. But I guess I'll see, right?

Excellent as always!

Author's Response: Hello again! Yep, sadly, only one more chapter. But I'll continue after that with the sequel, so hopefully it's not horribly, awfully sad. :)

I think I wanted people to be disappointed in Lily here, but I knew that I might get some big question marks and/or criticism for the way I characterized her in this chapter. I guess for me, the thing is, I know I have tons of time to put her through transformations, and I have a clear picture of how I'm going to get to the end and have it all tie together (well, in this aspect, at least)--but of course, I can't share it with everyone, because that would spoil the fun! And the other thing about her characterization in this chapter is that I didn't plan it out this way at all. I actually went in with the intention of making her very self-sacrificing and courageous and all that, but I couldn't do it. I don't know what it was, but it was like she looked up at me from the scene in my head and said, "Nope, sorry, I'm not doing that." So...blame her! Hahaha. :P

Anyway, I think the last chapter will tie some of this up and have it all make a little more sense. This chapter kind of leaves off on a depressing note, but there's a bit more to unravel, and I think it will all end up in an okay-ish place. Suffice it to say that I don't mean to make it seem like Lily doesn't WANT to be in the Order, just that she's more uncertain about it. It's hard for us to step back and try and wash away everything we already know about the Order, but in this case, Lily and James have really been given no details about what the Order does, beyond the bare minimum. We know it's all on the up and up, but they're pretty clueless--and while James jumps in because he's kind of had this in the back of his mind for a while, and it fits with basically what he wants to do in life, Lily's never even heard of it, and she doesn't have much of an idea of what she wants out of life even apart from that. So I think that's where her reluctance is coming from, in addition to worrying about dangers--I imagine that it would just be psychologically harder for someone like Lily, who's a Muggle-born and in danger just because of that, compared to someone likes James.

Anyway, I think perhaps that last part in the chapter could use some editing to make it clearer (obviously, since I've written something of an essay in explanation here), and I'll keep that in mind...I do plan on going through and fixing some things up with this when I'm done.

Oh, and I'm glad you love James! He is pretty great. :)


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