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29 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Rumbleroar goes roar 

1st October 2011:
Ugh hate Mary. Poor Remus!

Author's Response: Hahaha! I feel you, don't worry. I always knew what was to come with Mary, and have therefore never really liked her. But that's part of the reason I love her as a character!

Thanks for the review!


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Review #2, by Noblevyne 

2nd July 2011:
I'm actually a little bit glad that I missed a couple of chapters as now I get to respond to your review responses.

But first - this chapter's review! James telling Lily about his being an Animagus is a huge thing really - because it's marking point of trust in their relationship (and I quite like that you don't miss a beat in marking these little milestones - they're shout out to all of us who got obsessed with James and Lily, we have little to go on and what we know and can assume is hugely important to writing Marauders era James/Lily stories)

I hate Mary's personality, but I adore her as a character if that makes sense. You mentioned in one of your review responses having a crisis of faith because of the 'cliche' attached to having two friends: one cynical and one sweet - well, for one thing, that's only a bad thing if that's their only defining characteristics and for another, in small groups of friends I think there are those emergent personalities. I know my two best friends were different measures of optimistic and cynical when I was that age.

Prejudice is so vital to your story and I love that - Lily suffers from it, but doesn't want to be victim to it, James promotes it even when he thinks he's being righteous, Remus is and will always be a victim to it...and you've shown have even sane, supposedly rational people who aren't evil, or even necessarily bad can be prejudiced and how it can breed.

Aside from that I really want to see Mary get her comeuppance, she's such a pain! What an utter twit, Lily isn't perhaps always fair to her, but she's not wrong here and Mary needs a good slapping.

And um - yes, into responding a little to your responses - there's no need to thank me. I am so happy I've revisited your work, it's so enjoyably written and not melodramatic at all - nor is it boring.

I can't believe you worry about writing Sirius! You seem to have a natural feel for these characters. I love Sirius easy charm here, but you also subtly demonstrate the hierarchy within their group without overblowing just how awesome everyone is and making them completely infallible/sexy/cool/smart. They have realistic flaws, and even with characters you don't spend much time with, you can see how well they're written.

Peter is just amazingly done, I was impressed every time I saw him show up in a chapter. He plays an integral part and isn't just left to diddle his thumbs in the background.

And yes, this is officially a ramble-off now. I could do this all day!

Author's Response: It was equally fun for me to be able to read your response to my responses! :D Thanks a lot for coming back again to review...I'm frankly kind of shocked that there's even this much to say about my writing! :P

I absolutely understand what you mean about hating Mary's personality, but loving her as a character. Hearing that makes me smile! (Weird, I know.) That's just how I feel about her, too. I kind of delight in creating characters who are unlikable--because, really, I meet a LOT of people out there in the world who are just repellent to me, lol.

I love that you've picked up on how prejudice keeps cropping up--to me, it's one of the most central themes in the HP series, and more broadly, it brings up so many frustrating questions that extend far beyond the series. I've met too many people in my life who are sane and supposedly rational, as you put it, and yet suddenly they reveal themselves to be hugely prejudiced in one way or another. I don't understand prejudice, and I wish it didn't exist--but it does, and it's interesting to explore it in fiction.

Yay, I really am so glad that you think Sirius and the other Marauders are well-written. I definitely am insecure about writing them--maybe not so much James, but the other three, at least to some extent--and so every encouraging comment in that regard is great to hear. Especially glad that you like the way I've written Peter! :D

Thanks so much again!


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Review #3, by Leigh Kelley 

18th June 2011:
I've been sitting here for the last few minutes at a complete loss as to what to say. That isn't to say that the chapter was bad, because it wasn't. Far from it actually. The ending just slammed into me and knocked me speechless, because I honestly hadn't been expecting it.

But let me backtrack. I knew there had to be point in time where James told Lily everything. I figured it would have happened while they were still in school, but I couldn't decide how you would work it in. I think you chose the right moment, and I'm glad that she didn't run away, and that she didn't believe him right away. I would have found it completely unrealistic if she just accepted it right away, and you did well to include that moment of disbelief, or I would have been sitting here shaking my head. I also don't believe that she believed him too quickly, but I'm happy that she did so enough that he didn't have to transform so as to prove it to her.

Glad to see the boys haven't matured completely, haha. I can see how the stress of coming exams would send them back to their prank roots. Stress relief, yes? The prank on Snape was pretty funny, too.

Now to Mary. Her believing that Remus's Mum is a werewolf? I chuckled, because as Lily thought, going to be with a werewolf during the full moon is a bit stupid. Mary isn't exactly the sharpest tool though, huh? That was definitely a ugly side of her that was revealed there, but I can't with honesty say that it isn't believable. Lots of people feel that way, and it isn't far-fetched that Mary, a friend, would feel that way too. Not everyone can be as accepting as Lily, and I'm sure Remus feared his new friends would feel the same, or he would have told them, yes? Even in Harry's Era a dark cloud hovered over werewolves, so... I'm rambling. Point is, Mary's reaction is not unbelievable. Good on you for having her react that way. Not many people would have.

Loving this story. I already see I'm going to sit here and read the rest of this, then start on the sequel.

~Leigh

Author's Response: I'm really glad to hear that you think I did okay with the whole James telling Lily about being an Animagus thing. I came to realize as I was writing, and after I got some reviews, that it's something that seems simple, but it's actually very hard to write it in a way that isn't completely hackneyed or boring. It was an amazing revelation when the story was revealed in PoA, but it seems to fall flat in fan fiction re-tellings. Anyway, I did my best to keep it realistic, and I'm so happy that you liked it!

I couldn't let the school year end without the boys having at least one more run-in with Snape. I actually went back and re-read that section--it had been so long since I wrote it that I forgot the details of what happened there! I'm glad you thought it was funny...when I was re-reading, one of the lines actually made me laugh a bit, too. :P

We're always told in the books that werewolves are discriminated against, but only very few times do we get shown any real consequences of that discrimination. Harry doesn't care, of course, and he doesn't spend much time with people who do, but clearly there's a very strong prejudice against them in wizarding society. I figure that most people would feel the same thing as Mary to some degree--Harry and his friends are probably pretty unusual in that they don't. I guess both of those reasons played into my decision to write Mary like this--I wanted to offer an example of the prejudice against werewolves, but also show how accepting Harry and co. are.

Thank you so much again...I'm so glad you liked this chapter. (I feel like I keep repeating myself. :P)


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Review #4, by doglover 

9th January 2011:
wow, that was really mean of Mary. im surprised.

Author's Response: I'm glad you were surprised--I was hoping this would kind of come out of nowhere, if that makes sense at all. I think that we're so used to Harry's perspective about werewolves that it's a big shock to read about a character who represents the majority of wizarding society and sees werewolves as lesser than others. It's not very nice, but I wanted to explore that and show the kind of adversity Remus faced.

Thanks again!


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Review #5, by AlPadfootPotter96 

24th December 2010:
Wow...intense stuff going on in this chapter...

Author's Response: I'm glad to hear you found the chapter "intense"--not that I wanted to cause anyone serious anguish, of course, but it's always nice to hear that something I wrote was that effective!

Thanks again!


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Review #6, by girly1393 

9th September 2010:
Goodness sakes' alive! This was so intense. I just wanted to fricking (not the word I wanted to use) strangle Mary! I hope she gets killed while she's working as a Hit Wizard!

Bravo to you.

Author's Response: Haha! You know, when I was still posting chapters of the story, far more people hated Anna than Mary, I think, and I always wished I could explain WHY I didn't agree--I, of course, knew that Mary was capable of inducing strangulation, but no one else did until this chapter! :P

Because we see Remus through Harry's eyes only, I think we never saw how prevalent the prejudice against werewolves was in their society. Unfortunately, I think Mary's viewpoint would be much more common than Lily's, especially at a time when the Wolfsbane Potion didn't exist yet. Of course, it's a horrible way to think, but there were obviously a good many people who were not as compassionate as the ones we were most exposed to.

Thank you!


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Review #7, by Flower n Prongs 

13th July 2010:
Now that was a dramatic chapter. The entire "Remus's mum is a werewolf" thing amused me for the couple seconds it took me to realize how much it all bugged Mary. I mean... yikes. I definitely did not see the "crazy controlling bitch" side of her coming, since she seemed so meek. Its amazing what happened to her when she... cracked, I suppose. Yikes. I'm very excited to see what happens when they finish up Hogwarts. Defying Voldemort for the first time? Joining the Order of the Phoenix? So many interesting things that are yet to come...

Author's Response: Haha, well, you can't say that Mary's assumption about Remus' mum wasn't logical in some ways! :P Her attitude towards werewolves is certainly alarming, though I doubt it's uncommon. Remus himself tells Harry that most of wizarding society looks down on him. Of course, the fact that it's a common sentiment doesn't make it right at all.

Mary certainly did undergo a huge change--in my view, she got sick of keeping her opinions to herself (and with a best friend like Anna, she would have had to do that a lot) and being walked all over, so she went a little overboard in getting a backbone when she decided that was what she wanted.

Thanks again for reviewing!


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Review #8, by Ana 

6th May 2010:
Thats exactly like the fight i had with my friends i hate it when there like that very well written.

Author's Response: Hi Ana! Thank you for reviewing again. :)

Yes, people can be extremely frustrating when they're like this. I'm glad that came across for you in the chapter, and that you could relate to it--I feel like that means I'm accomplishing my job as a writer!


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Review #9, by Kimco 

28th April 2010:
That was really tense. With everyone fighting. It was still written really well though. I like that the fights get resolved in the end. (well except for the one with Mary x[ ) But that will get better, right?

It was still really funny. James turning in to a bunny (ha ha) I can so see that. I know that some other parts made me laugh to I just can't remember them right now. ^_^

Always 1,000/10

Author's Response: Yes, it was a conflict-ridden chapter, but I'm glad you found it well-written. And you're right, it's nice that at least Lily and James had everything resolved. Mary and Lily, of course, are another story, and you'll see how that plays out in future chapters. I won't say anything to spoil it yet!

I'm happy to hear there were also moments in this that made you laugh. I always appreciate it when authors lighten the mood a little bit, so I'm glad I could achieve that in this chapter!

Thanks again for reviewing!


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Review #10, by _hedwig_ 

24th April 2010:
totally dialouge fest...it's okay, it made the chapter more interesting.

Author's Response: Yep, crazy amounts of dialogue goin' on there. Usually I'm much better at controlling my tendency to slide into all-dialogue-all-the-time, but I guess I didn't accomplish it quite as well this time. :P I'm glad you didn't mind it, though!

Thank you!


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Review #11, by Jaggy 

3rd March 2010:
It cut off half of my review! Anyways, here's the rest:
Speaking of poor, Snape! Oh the torture he must go through. I'd really love to see him get a school-boy-type-revenge on James...if only to spite him for snagging Lily. Actually, I just enjoy seeing Angst!Snape take his frustrations out on others. Though...I suppose that's just regular Snape in the future. Stubborn, obsessive old grease ball.
Now to Mary. Mary, Mary. Did I mention I want to boil her? Did she never read Beauty and the Beast? Doesn't she know that just because he might have a little fur doesn't make him a bad person? (Or his mum, for that matter.) I just...I hate her right now. She's the VERY reason Remus has trust issues! (*hugs Remus*) I agree with Lily, I'd love him, fur and all.
Now that I've taken up enough of your time, I'll note that I can't wait to see the next chapter and good job!

Jaggy

Author's Response: (Well, that's strange that it cut off your review! But thanks for posting the rest.)

I do feel bad for Snape at times, too (other times, not so much...but that's a different story). I hope to try and include at least one more confrontation between him and James before the end of school, but if not, I'm quite sure it's not the last time they'll run into one another. ;)

Haha, well, I think Lily would agree with your sentiments about Mary. I knew this wasn't going to make her very popular, and I certainly don't like it either, but you do have to remember that we're given one very specific reaction to werewolf-ism in the HP books, and that Harry's, which I imagine would be very similar to Lily and James'. But there's a reason that Remus had such a hard time living in normal society: the general feeling towards werewolves was not one of good will. Really, I think Mary is in the majority with her views, and Lily and James (and Sirius and Peter) are in the minority. Of course, that doesn't make it right at ALL, but I think it's something you do have to keep in mind to contextualize the scene.

But I agree with you that it's people like her who led to Remus having difficulties trusting others, and as I've been writing this story, I've felt more and more that I'm writing some really strangely indirect ode to Tonks and Remus. :P I've realized what a remarkable woman Tonks must have been to be willing to make the sacrifices that came along with marrying Remus, as well as how much she must have loved him. And I think the very fact that he married her, considering how hesitant he was (and how hesitant we can imagine he was all throughout his life), really is a testament to how much he must have loved her, too.

Anyway, too often you see Remus/OC stories where the OC finds out about his lycanthropy and decides she wants to be with him anyway. Considering the attitudes of society (and the fact that this is set in an earlier generation), I felt like there was a realistic, though maybe not as nice, alternative to that. :)

I have the rough draft of the next chapter DONE, which is miraculous considering how long I've been at a standstill, and so I'm hoping (with a fair amount of certainty) that it'll be up this weekend. Though I do still hope you'll come back and read if I turn out to be wrong on that. :P

Thank you SO much for reviewing!


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Review #12, by Jaggy 

3rd March 2010:
I've just finished reading your story all the way to here and I must say that I love, love, LOVE it! (Favorited and all) The whole thing is an excellent interpretation of how Lily and James came to be. You're an excellent writer!

And now, this chapter. Uh, while I want to start with boiling Mary viciously, I'll go from the top and get to her last. (My poor, poor Remus. Oh, how I love him.)

Anyways: James telling Lily about their secret. Awesome. Half way wish I could see the others react to his telling of the secret, but...that's probably just my inner desire to see Remus more. (Because I love him.) I also love the little exchange between Lily and James at the end of that bit. "Now you're just being mean." Haha, poor James.

Author's Response: Hi there! Wow, what a lovely surprise to sign in and see two new reviews, considering that I haven't updated in quite a while. :)

First, thanks for taking all the time to read through the story. I really appreciate it, as well as the feedback! I'm so happy you enjoyed it.

So, the secret--you may get the chance to see how Sirius, Remus, and Peter react to it (I actually originally planned on putting it in, then decided it wouldn't fit in a lengthy scene, but now I'm leaning back towards including it). Regardless, though, Remus will definitely be in the next chapter in some form or another!

Oh, and I'm glad you thought the last bit of that part of the chapter was entertaining. :) Lily and James are kind of cute when they joke around with each other like that, aren't they? I think it's a nice after-effect of the rather aggravated dynamic we see in OotP--they still tease each other, but in a different way.



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Review #13, by Somebody 

1st March 2010:
I know this review is a little late, but better late than never I always say, at least the new chapter isn't up yet, so I don't feel too bad : ) Anyway I don't have as much to say as last time, but don't think I liked it less because of this, I just find some things more commentable than others, plus after a long night of
homework I'm really tired! Well, this chapter was as always amazing : D I loved how Lily found out about James being animagi! It was great : ) Also, the
humor in the story is just as funny as before! Little things crack me up that Sirius, or James says:)
That's about it for this chapter, I'm sure I'll remember something soon, and kick
myself for not mentioning it, but for now...I can't wait for the new chapter! Also, how do I check your author page? I know you mentioned it to me, but I never got around to it : ( and now I've forgotten.
Thanks until next time

Author's Response: Yes of course, late is better than never! I love reviews whenever people are nice enough to give them to me. And goodness knows I've been terrible about reviewing others' stories these days, not to mention my major failure at adding a new chapter so far...but I'm glad it gave you a chance to catch up without being buried under new ones. :)

I completely understand about certain chapters giving you more to say than others, and rest assured that I'm not the least bit offended! I'm so happy (and a little surprised) that you think I'm funny still. :) Maybe I'm too hard on myself when I say that I don't write humour very well.

And yep, Lily finding out about the Animagi thing was bound to happen eventually...funnily enough, I never had it planned out this way--you'd think I would have, considering that it's kind of an important moment. But I sort of accidentally ended up putting the wedding, Quidditch final, and full moon on the same day, and then realized the conflict it was bound to create. Naturally, I had to take advantage of it. :)

I'm so sorry for keeping you (and everyone else) waiting for the next chapter. Life has been all over the place these days. I'm currently about half done (excluding the serious edits that need to occur) with chapter 29, and trying to just power through it and finish no matter how horrendous the first draft ends up. I'm really, really hopeful that it'll be up this weekend.

Oh, and the author page is quite straightforward--just click on my author name in any of the chapters or the story link. The area where I write updates is just above where it says "Author's Favourite Stories", but I have to say I haven't had many updates to give lately. I've been at a bit of a standstill until yesterday and today. I'll try and be more specific about how far along I am with writing, though! :)

Thank you so much for the review! It motivates my fingers to continue typing.


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Review #14, by Mirrored 

1st March 2010:
I finally caught up reading this story, and it is now one of my favorites. I love the life that you brought back to some of the (well let's face it- sometimes overdone) characters. I am looking forward to following this story!

Author's Response: Hi Mirrored! Thanks for the review!

I'm so flattered that you took the time to read the whole story! I know I usually get a bit intimidated by the task of reading stories with a bunch of chapters (and long ones, at that), so I really appreciate that you read it all!

And I know what you mean, it's certainly an overdone pairing! But it's wonderful to hear that you found something a little different and fresh in my story. That's really all I can hope for! :)

I'm doing my best to finish the next chapter, so hopefully before too long there will be more story to follow along with...thanks again for reviewing!


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Review #15, by Tonks101 

26th February 2010:
Hey!! Wanted to tell my favorite aUrther i have an acount and I am now tonkS101

Author's Response: Well, hi, Tonks101! That's great that you joined the site. And I'm so flattered you consider me your favourite author! :) I should probably get the next chapter finished soon so I don't lose that status. :P

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Review #16, by Prongs05JP 

25th February 2010:
D: Nooo Mary and Lilyyy - no reconciliation :'( I feel like crying, but it's just one of those things growing up I think... see I have this friend, who's changed a lot in a bad way and I guess I'm a bit of a Mary because I bottle everything up to avoid a confrontation - because I feel if I had one then there'd be no going back. So I can sort of relate... although I'm not sure who I'm relating too xD

After ranting about my private life, I thought the way Lily took the Animagi news was quite creative: "You actually made me think that you were going to be honest, and then you come up with the most absurd story-" she actually didn't think James was capable of doing that xD I laughed a little at that - fab (:

Snape's a prat, so I'm going to applaud the Marauders on that one ;) (Inventive prank haha :D)

That fight was really well done, I have to say. The way Mary slowly brought herself back and then Lily brought up the topic slowly - but it is such a sad one, that. I know I've said this before - how the frienship is falling apart. One of the worst tradgedies of the story ):

I'm actually feeling a little good for Lily, for speaking up her own opinions - she's bottling up all her frustration about how her friends are acting and it's about time she let lose and made them think about Lily's own feelings - someone except themselves for a change :/ A little likee:

"Never cared?" Lily repeated. "Mary, how many times have I listened to and supported you in the last week alone?" - You go girl!

So another Fab Chap (and I do believe I'm up to date now xD, finally) so I finally get to say UPDATE SOON s'il vous plait!!

1000/10 XD
Prongs05JP

Author's Response: All right, I'm finally here to respond to this one! Sorry it took me a while between responses.

You're certainly right about Lily and Mary's fight being just one of those things that happens as you age. I don't know about you (well, okay, I suppose I do know something based on what you just told me), but I certainly wasn't friends with the same people at the end of high school that I was when I was 11. I'd say that it's fairly normal to change friends between those two ages. I think that especially as school comes to a close, people try to figure out who they are and what they want, and find out some things about themselves and the people around them that. Unfortunately, as it sounds like you know, that kind of change doesn't always bring happy endings. (Then again, it still has that capability--if nothing ever changed, where would our lovely protagonists be?)

I'm really happy to hear that you thought Lily's reaction was creative on my part! I was kind of hoping that it would be somewhat original (I don't think I've ever come across a story where she doesn't believe him/whoever else tells her, although I'm sure there are quite a few). But I really think that disbelief would be the only plausible reaction! I mean, of course James is smart, but becoming an Animagus is pretty difficult. It would sound ridiculous coming from someone who hadn't even left school yet. And also, I think James & Co. would have been pretty good at keeping things a secret (if Dumbledore and even Snape didn't know, why would anyone else?), so there wouldn't have been any previous suspicion of that on Lily's part--unlike the whole werewolf situation. Anyway, I'm really happy it made you laugh a little.

And then the fight...I'm also really glad that you thought it was well-done. I don't know if it's just my own personal preferences coming through, but I always find that when there's arguments in stories, they can very quickly become melodramatic and unrealistic--so if you think I managed to avoid those two things, that makes me feel great! :)

It's interesting that you say all those things about Lily, because in my mind, they could equally apply to both her and Mary, and I sympathize with both of them. Something I find really interesting about writing is that, more often than not, your protagonist will be the ones that your readers always sympathize with. I wonder where someone's sympathies would lie if I had written this entire story from Mary's perspective, for example?

Anyway, I'll come back down out of the clouds of hypothetical thought now. :P I'm glad my late updating at least gave you the chance to catch up on reviewing, since it probably doesn't have any other good effects! I'll try to update soon, I promise. I was hoping to do it this weekend, but that's looking less and less likely... :S

Thanks again!


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Review #17, by Tonks 

19th February 2010:
Whenever you update is awsome!!! I know how it is to be busy!

Author's Response: Hi Tonks! You're so nice. :) Yes, life is getting very busy these days, and it's getting harder and harder to find time to write. Thanks for being understanding, and I'm hoping that things will fall into place and I'll be able to update sometime this weekend!

Thanks so much for another review!


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Review #18, by Tonks 

16th February 2010:
Omg! Lov it! Please! Update!

Author's Response: Hi Tonks! Thanks for reviewing again! I'm really glad to hear that you're still enjoying the chapters.

As for updating, I don't think it will happen until the middle of next week at the earliest! :( Sorry! Too many things to do over the next week. But I have a plan of what to write, so I'll try and get it done as quickly as possible.

Thanks again!


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Review #19, by redhead1287 

15th February 2010:
YES!! finally he tells her!
This chapter was excellent! I loved how you integrated Mary's story... I can't believe she would say that about Werewolves!! ...totally didn't expect that. I thought it was a perfect mix of James and Lily too. I like that Lily still keeps getting frustrated with James and his pranks even when they are dating... after all, it isn't very realistic for her to just stop being who she was for many years just to forgive him for everything now that they are dating. But they are so wonderful together! I love reading their parts!

I can't wait for the next update!!

Author's Response: Hi again! Thanks so much for leaving another review. :)

Yes, finally! I thought it was appropriate here...well, it was kind of necessary, because I didn't want to make James concoct some elaborate lie to keep the secret from her. I think it was time, given how much James loves Lily. And he did kind of want to show off, too. :P

It's a funny thing about people, how you can't ever see what they're really thinking (even more so when they're fictional). It makes it really surprising sometimes when you find out that someone has beliefs that aren't really very nice, or are completely opposite to yours...it's a disappointing feeling.

But you do have to remember that Mary is not Lily. She's not as brave or as accepting as she is, and given what we've seen in the books, it's probably fair to say that Mary's opinion is shared by more people than Lily's. Not that it's right to think that way, of course--but Mary and Lily are examples of the kinds of attitudes that exist toward werewolves, and I don't think we got to hear both perspective as much in the books.

And as for Lily being irritating with James' behaviour, you're right, she's still pretty much the same person as before. I've always thought that Lily would maybe be a bit more permissive about this kind of thing than we think--after all, in the scene in OotP, her mouth did "twitch", like she was about to laugh. :P And now that she's going out with James, I'm sure that even if she does get a little miffed, she gets over it.

I hope I won't keep you waiting too long for the next chapter. I don't think I'll manage it by this weekend, but hopefully sometime next week or the weekend after!

Thanks for the review! :)


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Review #20, by Hermione33 

14th February 2010:
I definitely do not mind long chapters. ;)
I'm loving this story so far! And man, this storyline with Mary is intense in this chapter, which I actually surprisingly love. ^_^
Keep up the great work!

Author's Response: Hi there! I'm glad to hear you don't mind the long chapters. I suppose I shouldn't worry too much if they're long because I really can't cut anything out...that at least means that there's some valuable stuff in there!

Yes, it did get a little intense there with Mary, didn't it? I'm glad you liked it! I always find that these argument scenes have a tendency to get over-dramatic if written improperly, so I'm really encouraged to hear that you thought it was good.

I'll try my best to keep it up, and thank you very much for the review! :)


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Review #21, by Harry and Ginny 

13th February 2010:
it's sad that there will be no reconciliation between Lily and Mary. i like the little moments between James and Lily and how he still feels nervous by saying to Lily that he loves her. i can't wait to read more from u!!!^_^

10/10

Harry and Ginny

Author's Response: Hello again!

It is sad to see Mary and Lily's friendship destroyed, but I can say without spoiling anything (I think) that it would have happened at some point in the future, if not here in this chapter. I've tried to add on more to this part of the response, but every time I do, I end up telling stuff that I should just leave for future chapters--so I guess I'll just say that you'll see what I mean when it comes to the sequel.

I think saying "I love you" is one of those things that is a little strange at the start--you don't know when to say it, when not to, or how often. And considering that James is no Casanova, and it's only the second time it's been said...I thought it only made sense for him to be nervous. I'm glad you liked it. :)

Thanks for another great review; I really appreciate it!


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Review #22, by saffy 

13th February 2010:
Hi there :D

"the love business" i loved the phrasing of this :)

"James reflected for a moment that it was not, on the whole, the ideal vision of Lily coming into his room for the first time" this was hilarious :):):) As was Lily only believing James had become Animagi without premission from the ministry :) Actualy this chapter was full of the funnies "when in doubt, snog it out"

I like the way you did the "reveal" if you see what i mean, The whoel werewolf animagus situation is really important and it was great how you didnt rush it and really explained Jame's thought process. I have always loved the way you deal with pivitol marauder moments andthis was no exception.

The charctersation of Jmes was awesome to, it so sweet how nervous he is :)

"his frustration was manifesting as a severe regression in maturity"

i love the way you write the language and phrasing is just so sophisticated and humourous its great :)

"She supposed she probably would have been back to detesting him if she werent in love with him"
possibly my favourite sentence in the entire story :D closely followed my this "We'l make arrangements for me to kill you later."

Your charcter development with Lily is excellent she trying to keep all her personaltiy traits which she likes about herself whilst growing and changing as sis natural to do. The relationship she has with her friends is also great i feel sometimes that thoes sorts of charcters gte frogotten about but if course her friends would chnage with her and react differently to her going out with james.

I also loved the scene with snape really it just perfectly showed the conflict thats going on with lily within herself.

Amazing chapter Thanks !

p.s Im giving up the internet for lent (apart for studying purposes) so i wont be able to read or reviw the rest of this story for the next six and half weeks, just didnt want you to think i had stopped reading lol :)

Author's Response: Hi saffy! It's so neat to see all the lines you liked in the chapter, and thank you for the long review!

I'm glad you thought the "reveal" (as you put it) was done well. It's not an easy conversation to get right, because if you explain every last detail, it's kind of redundant for everyone reading--but then you can't under-explain, either, because then the conversation doesn't really make sense. As for Lily only believing when she said the thing about the Minstry, I'm glad you thought it was funny. I think she was probably standing there slowly starting to realize that James was telling the truth, and that was just the one thing that really convinced her.

As for a lot of the other lines that you found funny, all I can say is that this chapter was really smooth for me to write, so the planets must have been aligned that day. Usually it takes me a bit more effort to get funny lines in there. :P The one about Lily going "back to detesting him if she weren't in love with him" was one of those that just made me feel like I got the upper hand on the literary gods, or something; I was very pleased with it. :) I think I might have to agree with you about it being one of my favourite sentences!

You're very right--Lily is changing like everyone does. She's seen some of what she thought were her better qualities backfire on her and she's changed her mind about a few people close to her, but in the end she tries to stick to what she thinks is right--which is what happened in that scene with Snape.

I'm really happy that you think the relationships with Anna and Mary are good, too. It's nice to get this far into the story and finally let some things unravel and play out the way I planned them to, like the scene with Mary in this chapter. I'm even happier to find that people are reacting to it positively! :)

I'm so flattered that you love the way I write, too. That's just a wonderful compliment!

Wow, I'm impressed that you're giving up the internet for that long--sometimes I wish I could do that too! It would make life much simpler, I think. :) With any luck, the rest of the story will be fully posted by the time Easter rolls around, so you can come back then and read it all (or whatever I manage to get written, at least)!

Thanks again, and I'll look forward to hearing from you again in a while!


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Review #23, by SeVeRuS LoVeR 

13th February 2010:
O it was sooo sooos sooo good i loved this probs my fav chappie of the whole story!! i cant really believe mary's reaction i mean goodness i just didnt see it coming but i found it a bit comical the way she thought it was remus' mum hehe but i def dnt think tht there will be any reconciliation there at all :(( too bad but Mary wasnt exactly a great friend so i understand

also the snape scene was a bit of an eye opener for lily which i liked it was nice

i know you cant update soon so i wont tell you to this time haha :PP

btw i like the long chapters haha ;))
10 out of freaking 10 haha

Author's Response: Hi again! I'm so pleased to hear that you loved this chapter so much! Once I posted it, I had a weird attack of worrying about whether it was any good, and hearing that you liked it just makes me feel so much better. :)

Haha, Mary's statement about it being Remus' mum is one of those lines that you just have to giggle at a bit, isn't it? She's so dramatic about it, and it seems like she knows the truth, and then...she goes off in the wrong direction!

And you're right in mentioning that the friendship between Lily and Mary was never really that strong. Mary always held onto resentment that she never voiced, and here, Lily is to blame too--because she DID continue associating with Snape, and she tried to avoid what had happened to Mary as much as possible because she partially felt guilty for it. Had Mary spoken up, or had Lily stepped forward and resolved things, their friendship probably would have been more resilient. As it is, this was kind of the straw that broke the camel's back, and it would be very difficult for them to fix things if they wanted to.

The whole thing with Snape--I worried about that part with Lily, because I thought people might think she was out-of-character (and also because I couldn't get Snape's dialogue right in that part, but that's a different story). Having been in her position personally (being the girlfriend in a group of boys who are doing dumb things, and being the only one telling them to stop), I can vouch for the fact that it just gets plain old tiring to be the one who's the stick-in-the-mud. So I do hope that it made sense that she kind of let it go before being reminded that she was in the wrong, and that it helped to justify the way she reacted with Mary later on.

Thanks for the low-pressure on the updating thing. :) It is shaping up to be a bit of a busy week, and I don't if I'll have much time at all to write...but we'll see how it goes! I'm relieved to hear that you like the long chapters, too! They just seem to be falling about a thousand words more than usual for the last couple, but hopefully as long as it's interesting, that's not a big deal!

Thank you again for reviewing!


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Review #24, by technicolor 

13th February 2010:
Hey Penny,

Wow. I am impressed. While I knew you'd tie up the issues between Lily and Mary somehow, I didn't expect their friendship to go out with a bang like this. I think the subplot of the three girls is probably the best part about your whole story. It really says something about how insightful you are concerning relationships, and the way Mary and Anna went from being "the sweet girl" and "the sarcastic girl" to really having full personalities at the end of the story was extremely well done. The twist at the end with Mary's "dark side" coming out is a great touch because it's an ode to Remus and Tonks' relationship, in a way. It's also something that was properly foreshadowed and something you don't really come to expect because Mary is supposedly "the sweet one" that we meet at the beginning. (Though I'm usually more suspicious of people like that, so kudo's to you for that). The fact that Mary's still harbouring resentments from years ago is also something that unfolded very nicely. It's something girls tend to do - hold on to grudges for years and years - so it gives the story a very realistic quality.

I have to go do groceries before the store closes... Will add more later!

x Sophie

Author's Response: Hi Sophie! And wow, wow...this review is just fantastic! I'm not even sure where to begin...

While Mary's role in the story has shifted since I first planned it out, this is a scene that has always remained, because I felt like it was one thing that could take Lily and Mary's friendship in the direction I wanted it to go. Lily is such a tolerant, compassionate person, that I don't think it would be very, very hard for her to be friends with someone who didn't share those values.

Not that I'm trying to make Mary out to be this completely terrible person, of course. You do have to take into account that Lily is a rather remarkable person, and certainly much braver than Mary--in this way, I think Harry's similarity to his mother really shines through. We see Remus through his eyes in the books, and they're eyes that are very accepting and inclusive. But from the way that people talk about intolerance in the wizarding world, I think it's safe to say that not everyone was like that, and that perhaps Mary's reaction (especially considering the generational difference) was perhaps more common than the one that James, Sirius, Peter, Lily, and (later) Harry had. Even Ron expressed some harsh feelings in the moment he first found out that Professor Lupin was a werewolf, and it doesn't make him an awful character.

(Oh, and I do love that you've made some sort of connection with this and with Remus and Tonks...because I feel like it makes their relationship all that much more special, to give an example of how unlucky Remus had been in the past when it came to romance.)

Goodness, I'm probably going to go over the character limit on this response. But I'm so, so glad you think I've done well with this part of the plot. I never knew if it was going to work out the way I wanted, or if everyone reading was going to buy it. I kind of did want to start out with Mary and Anna in these somewhat polarized roles, and then bring them to opposite sides, or at least to a middle ground, where you couldn't really describe either one of them with a single word anymore. And if you think that I've managed that...well, I'm a very happy author. :)

Anyway, I could probably say more on all this, and I didn't address all the points in your review, but I do think I'm about to run out of room! Thank you so much for the review!


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Review #25, by C A L M 

12th February 2010:
hi me again. Love this chapter as you involved plenty of the other characters in it e.g. maruaders, snape, anna and mary rather then making it all just about Lily and James which I really like because it makes the story have more of a plot line rather then just lily/james and relationship (not that I mind coz i love reading about their relationship) but i really love this story because it is so much more then just them getting together. Hope that makes sense lol.

10/10 as always. Grammer etc is perfect

Author's Response: Hi Ashleigh! Thanks for another great review. :)

Whew, I'm so glad you thought the chapter was good! It was so strange--I felt really good about it until I actually posted it yesterday, and then I had all these worries that I should have changed it, that no one was going to like it...but now that I know you liked it, I feel much better!

Plot is the tricky thing about romance stories, isn't it? I never know if I'm getting it right, but I do recognize how difficult it is to keep a story interesting if you build EVERYTHING around the romance of your two main characters. Because once they get together, then there's not much you can do, save starting new plot lines or causing romantic drama. Now that I've gotten past the point where Lily and James are together, I'm really glad to have these other story lines to flesh things out. So, I completely know what you mean, and you made perfect sense. :) I'm glad that all my little subplots are giving you something else interesting to read, apart from Lily and James!

Thanks again!


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