53 Reviews Found

Review #1, by nott theodore 

8th July 2014:
Well this was a really cute chapter! I've known for a while that this was going to happen - it was kind of inevitable with how close the two of them have grown, I think. But I liked the fact that Sirius planned the day for them so carefully but at the same time he wasn't assuming anything, and he's been so careful to take care of her feelings and consider the fact that she went through a horrible experience with Bertram. He's so sweet when he's with her and I think it's good that the other characters have noted the change too, since it makes it more obvious that it's about Laura.

All of the revelations were really interesting to read - of course as a reader we know most of them already from canon, but it was good to see Laura's reaction to everything. Now that she knows all about the fact that the Marauders are Animagi and the fact that Remus is a werewolf I think they'll just grow closer, because she has less reason to mistrust him and suspect him of anything. The foreshadowing of the betrayal with that line about Peter was neatly put in! And I liked the fact that she's finally realised Sirius did follow her on the day at the Potters, so that's erased some more of the pain from the past.

Sian :)
Gryffindor House Cup 2014 Review

Author's Response: Yes this kind of conversation is always hard to write, becasue we as readers know everything that's being said, but of course the MC doesn't. I've seen a few Marauder era fics where they avoid it entirely by saying, for example, "Lily knew Remus was a werewolf and she knew James was an Animagus", which to me is cheating and also not believable. Well, the werewolf is believable, as I do think it might have been mentioned to her as they were both prefects, but if Dumbledore had no idea those boys were Animagi then I don't think Lily would have known either. Just my thoughts, of course. This scene has had a bit of an edit in the revised version and I think it reads better, but it's nice to ahve this feedback on the original text. Thanks!

cheers Mel

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Review #2, by Cheeky0810 

13th June 2012:
Lirius! :D love them!!

I love this chapter, it flowed really nicely and I liked how your incorporated all of the information. Though I did think Laura was going to figure it out herself, but I liked this too :)

Fantastic writing, can't wait to read on!! :)

Author's Response: You know, she probably would have worked it out for herself, but that would have taken a lot more time. Besides, Sirius figures that if she's sharing her biggest treasure (so to speak) with him, then the least he can do is share his biggest secrets with her. He's intending for her to be around for a while now, so he doesn't see it as being risky or anything. Glad you liked it!

cheers, Mel

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Review #3, by Lillylover22 

2nd March 2012:
Great chapter 9/10 : )

Author's Response: thanks! Glad you liked it.

cheers, Mel

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Review #4, by moodymarauder 

28th December 2011:
I can totally imagine the boys running up the stairs in their animal form, singing like disney characters. :D

Author's Response: Aw, that would be awesome! I totally have to write that scene now, don't you think? HTM, the Musical! *ROTFL*

cheers, Mel

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Review #5, by singer123 

15th December 2011:
You've written it beautifully.
Laura won't have to feel insecure anymore.

Remus was bitten when he was a Two year old?
That's so awful.

Author's Response: We don't actually know when Remus was bitten - all we have is him saying he was "a very small boy" when he was bitten. JKR may have had another age in mind, but I interpreted it as being just past toddler age. Of course, it's just speculation on my part but it's as good a guess as any. :)

cheers, Mel

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Review #6, by classicblack 

23rd October 2011:
First time :)- I liked how you didn't describe it in full detail as I've found other authors have done (which sort of creeps me out to read and I generally skip over those parts) but it's nice that they're relationship as evolved to that. And now Laura knows everything! Yay!
Until next chapter,

Author's Response: Ah, THE event. Like Stephen King, I tend to think that the imagination does a better job than an author does generally, so it's better to hint at some things and let people fill in the blanks themselves rather than go into too much detail. That, and the ToS here doesn't allow it, hahaha. But yeah, she knows everything now, and that should really put an end to her trust issues. Again, the timing seemed right. :)

cheers, Mel

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Review #7, by In The Shadows I Dwell 

11th August 2011:
Ahh, the mature scene. I don't really quite have words to describe how you've managed to pack so much into a single chapter. Of course it's appropriately titled, as with all your chapters, but I have to admit, initially I couldn't even begin to imagine what revelations would be made, so it came as a bit of a shock to see the entire Marauder's history out there for Laura to hear, it's also good that they're more willing to trust one another now, although it's obvious why.

I think it's Laura's reaction to Remus' condition which most impresses me, she has always been a really intelligent character and even now hearing such news, she doesn't jump to awful conclusions like others may have. I think it's wonderful that she could accept their faults, and see the lengths that they have gone to, it really emphasises that the really strong caring aspect in her character, despite some of her trust issues, which of course are understandable. She's just one of those beautifully written characters who are just perfectly balanced, something I know I've always struggled to create.

I absolutely loved this chapter!

- Ash (InTheShadowsIDwell)

Author's Response: Yes, the mature scene. It had to happen eventually and this felt like the right place and time. This was also the occasion of her getting over all her trust issues, which have been fairly imposing to date - once she had made the decision to go that extra step,and once he had confided all those secrets in her, there was really nothing left to doubt. And with the way I'd written her character, she would have to be accepting of Remus, wouldn't she? It wouldn't sound right if she went off the deep end about it - yes, she did a few times at Sirius, but was because she was emotionally invested and it felt personal. This isn't.

Thanks again, Mel

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Review #8, by LivingLife42 

25th July 2011:
I loved this chapter! No more secrets! :) It was very well written. I also liked how you did the scene before it ;) :P Sirius was such a gentleman telling her to tell him if she changed her mind (I wouldn't have changed my mind either if it was with someone like Sirius :P)

Very well done :)

Author's Response: Yes, no more secrets. I thought the timing was right and also that an intimate setting like that was the ideal place to air intimate secrets. It was also time to get her trust issues out of the way once and for all, and once he'd told her all that, she could hardly think that he didn't trust her, could she?

cheers, Mel

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Review #9, by girly1393 

6th June 2011:
Eh well, what better than pillow talk to discuss serious secrets?

Bravo to you.

Author's Response: Well, it seemed as good a time as any. And better than most in that the whole thing was as much an exercise in trust as it was anything else. Pleased you agree! : )

cheers, Mel

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Review #10, by theelderwand 

23rd August 2010:
The Shrieking Shack - I shoulda thought of that. Perfect. and it was the right time. Very tastefully done as well.

I think it was extremely appropriate that their pillow talk here covered all the remaining secrets. It felt right to do it in this way. An intimate moment requires intimate conversation and considering the secrets that Sirius is keeping, this fits.

I have an odd feeling that Laura will attempt to help Remus/Charlotte if not be consulted on that issue by Remus in the near future.

Great chapter!


P.S. I liked "Pete's a rat" too!

Author's Response: You know, I'm surprised how few people use the Shrieking Shack for something like this - it's the perfect venue, especially if (like me) you think the marauders didn't know about the Room of Requirement. And though I didn't really intend for it all to come out as pillow talk, like you said I think it works for the circumstances. This is all about trust so when better?

Part of me always giggles a bit when I think about Peter's animagus form. You'd think someone might have twigged, would you? :)

cheers, Mel

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Review #11, by Capella Black 

15th August 2010:
"And Pete's a rat" - Mwah ha ha ha ha! Am having a bit of a AVPM moment here. Awesomely awesome chapter - it was a really nice touch having these two things happen at the same time, as if she can trust him with, well, that, then it was certainly time for him to trust her enough to explain about the animagus stuff. Glad that you chose for her to learn about Remus as well, as she's proven herself to be trustworthy and non-judgemental, and so it'd be a shame to see that Remus hadn't given Sirius permission. All good.

Also, I liked your use of dialogue at the start of the chapter to air some of Laura's insecurities - it was high time they did that, and high time that they discussed the break up, so I'm glad you added it.

Cool chapter, onto the next...

Author's Response: Note to self: MUST SEE AVPM. I still haven't found the time to sit down and watch that and I don't know when I will, but I must make the effort so I get all these references. Anyway, glad you liked this chapter! It was tricky to get right because the reader knew almost all of the particulars already, so keeping it interesting was a bit of a challenge. But yes, it really did develop that trust issue, which had to be addressed once and for all if this was going to work.

cheers, Mel

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Review #12, by doglover 

13th August 2010:
they did it!!! and he told her! finally!

Author's Response: Yes, and yes. I thought it was about time. And when better than when she's just trusted him with something pretty big? It seemed appropriate and I'm glad that people like it because it's a pretty big step in so many ways.

cheers, Mel

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Review #13, by dramione_ftw_4ever 

8th August 2010:
*Response to AN* "And Pete's a rat" I agree to you there. He's definetly an arse for going to moldy voldey. Definetly nice to hear. BTW, I loved the chapter! As I do all the others... except the one where Laura went all huffy and melodramatic when Sirus couldn't tell her about Remus' "Furry little problem". But, this gets 10/10 PLZ read my stuff, I'll love you forever! ^^ (Not that I don't already... but still...)

Author's Response: Hi again!

So pleased you liked my little joke about Peter - I just couldn't resist throwing it in there, hahaha. Too good an opportunity to miss!

As for reading your stuff, well the time it took me to get around to responding to this review should indicate how limited my free time is. In another month or so I'll be re-opening my review thread on the forums, though, so by all means snag a spot in that when it's free. That is unfortunately the best I can offer, because if I do any other sort of undertaking I might not get to it before 2014 or thereabouts. Sorry!

cheers, Mel

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Review #14, by Schnatz 

2nd July 2010:
Hey Mel,

this time it will be really a short review. Actually I have so much to say about the last chapters but uni with all the exams is too stressful to take an hour or so the time for reviewing. I'm sorry! But at least I'm reviewing, right?! ;-)

As always i enjoyed reading the last chapters a lot ... hmm, I just like reading this story, so every chapter is good and interesting. Also this chapters you call too filler-ish are good ones. My opinion about this is that there have not always to be a lot of action ... in our everyday life isn't every day something spectacular, is it? And I'm also interested in the 'normal' and 'uninteresting' things of Laura's life. It's also part of the story either! :)

I'm not exactly sure about it but nevertheless I wanted to note it: When Remus was biten and became a werewolf he was seven years old, wasn't he? Not as you (Sirius in the story) told two years old. But that's only a detail which is not too important.

More important was the scene in all ... and it was great. I like the first time from Laura and Sirius making love ... and then how Sirius told her about Remus' story and the Animagi-story.

Haha, stupid Sirius ... that he haven't realized that he was still a dog and not himself. Yep, love is also blind to Sirius sometimes. :P

I'm looking forward to read the last 14 chapters ;-)


Author's Response: Hi again!

First, to answer your question - we are never given an age for Rems receiving the werewolf bite. The closest we have is when Remus himself says "I was a very small boy when I received the bite". As a mother, I took that to mean toddler, so I made him two ... much older than that doesn't make him "a very small boy" according to my reckoning. Perhaps the German version of the books had an error that listed him as being 7, but the UK version doesn't give an exact age.

Aside from that, I'm really pleased that you're still enjoying my story This particular chapter was tricky to get right because the reader knows the story already, so I tried to add a couple of things in to make this particular version of the telling unique - the reference to him chasing her down (and not realising he was a dog at the time) was one of them, so I'm glad you liked that.

cheers, Mel

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Review #15, by always_dreaming 

26th March 2010:
well i'm glad that's all out of the way. now hopefully we can avoid the obnoxiously pointless break ups.

Author's Response: Hi again!

Yep, all out in the open now, so the fights due to any keeping of secrets should now be eliminated. Not that that means that there wont' be other fights, of course, but at least she knows everything now. And if that's not proof he trusts her, I don't know what is. :)

cheers, Mel

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Review #16, by desert_oasis 

19th March 2010:
I love it! I always look forward when i find time to read this. I got a job now so my time is a bit tight. But I found time tonight!

Can't wait to read the other chapters!!

Author's Response: Hi there! Welcome back!

Ah, don't worry, I totally understand about real life getting in the way and all that. And wow, a new job, that's always hard when you've got a baby. I remember having awful trouble going back to work after each of my kids ... I thoroughly recommend digital photo frames. They make it so much easier. :)

Anyway, I'm glad you liked this chapter because it was a bit of a hard one to get right - everyone reading it knows the story already but the main character doesn't, so it's a matter of making the telling of it interesting.

thanks, Mel

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Review #17, by ochalke5 

8th March 2010:
Whoa, i liked that chapter a lot! It has to be one of my favorites! It was so god. I can't tell you enough! It was wonderful! Oh goodness Mel. It was wonderful!!!

Author's Response: Hi again!

You know, I'm so pleased that you liked this chapter, because it can be really hard to get the whole animagus/werewolf conversation in there in a way that's still interesting for the reader who, after all, knows it all already. But I inserted a few things like the amortentia and the running after her as a dog so it looks like those helped it pull through. Thank you!

cheers, Mel

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Review #18, by Macey 

14th February 2010:
I only have one thing to say: I LOVE this story!

The characters, plot, and length of the story are great. I don't know about other reviewers, but Laura has to be the best Sirius/OC. I understand her and her insecurities very well (which should be destroyed by now, though)

I do have a few comments: I have nothing against the sex (I was rooting for it) but she IS using protection, right? I know its impossible to get her pregnant though (according to canon) but I'm still a little concerned. The two things I'm really worried about is Laura's family's reaction to her dating Sirius (will her Dad ask her to stop??!!!) and the fan club's OPERATION: Break Laura Cauldwell and Sirius Black up. And what the Slytherins (Carrows, Flint...) might do to Laura. She never gets a break, does she?
There's also not been a lot on school Quidditch games, is Gryffinndor going to win the cup? Also, is there a chance we'll see Dumbledore or McGonagall anytime soon? Or Perkins, we haven't seen much of Laura's school life this year.
That said, can you give me ANY hints on future chapters? *Puppy Dog face* And please, please tell me you'll post all the Sirius POV (now, if possible!). And all the other one-shots. I wish there were some Laura/Sirius AU fics where everyone lives happily ever after.*hint hint*

Best Wishes,

Author's Response: Hi Macey! Thanks for the review! :D

Ah, yes, Laura and her insecurities. They are pretty much destroyed by now (as evidenced by the sex) but occasionally it might still pop up. It takes a lot to make a naturally insecure person more self confident.

As for protection, well it's never addressed in the canon but I like to think that there's a charm for that purpose. So yeah, she's not likely to get pregnant. And to address your concerns - I won't say anything about what might happen if/when her family find out about it, because that would be a spoiler. As for the fan club, though, well I will say that Elvira's not finished yet. And that's all I'll say there.

Hmm, school Quidditch games. To be honest I wasnt' going to include any more because, like JKR said, they're a pain to write. We will see some more of classes coming up soon though. I've been deliberately sketchy about classes in seventh year though because we have absolutely NO idea what is taught then, so I've had to make it all up and I don't want to stretch that too far.

Right. Hints for future chapters. How about, next one includes her birthday, the one after that (which needs a severe re-write) includes a Charms class, and the one after that mentions Sobering Solution. Is that obtuse enough to not give anything away?

And don't worry, I will post those one-shots but it won't be till this story is over, and there are about 10 or 12 chapters to go. As for AU, well I'll think about it. No guarantees, but it's possible.

Thanks again for a simply lovely review :D

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Review #19, by inky 

13th February 2010:
This story is amazing. You've got quite a talent! I've never enjoyed a Sirius/OC story so much, and it's really given me a new light on his personality. Not to mention, Laura is a really great character. I love how much depth you give each of them! Not to mention, after reading through all of this, it's really wonderful to see Sirius and Laura so happy. They really do deserve it :)

So, one constructive criticism and two questions/requests. My only complaint is how lightly they're taking the war. It always seemed to me that, as small as Hogwarts is, despite house rivalries and such, that injuries and deaths attributed to the war would have a much stronger impact on each of the students, even if they aren't personally related to the victim. "Watching" them read the newspaper is a bit like watching the morning news... you feel bad, but none of hits home. I suppose that has to do with their age (even though they are getting older) and their limited direct exposure. Anyway, just a bit to think about.

My questions: first, do you have an image of Laura that you're working from, either a photo of someone or just a picture in your head? I wasn't sure if you were intentionally leaving it open to the reader's interpretation, but it'd be nice to have a visual to put with her personality. That is, if you could ever manage to find something suitable. I've written a few short fics myself (never published, I'm far too fearful of rejection), and I imagine that would be one of the hardest things to do. My second question was whether you had considered posting an extended, unrated version, perhaps on another site. The physical aspect of a relationship isn't necessarily a shallow thing, as you've pointed out through Sirius, and it seems a shame to have it cut short. You've got such a talent, and I think some scenes would feel just a little more complete if they were extended a little further.

Great job, and good luck. You are a wonderful author! Keep it up :)

Author's Response: Hi inky! Thanks for the review! :D

Right. Questions first. No, I don't really have a picture of Laura that I'm working from, though since I got the banner for this story I've been kind of thinking of her as looking like that. It doesn't really matter, though - someone on YouTube made a clip based on my story that cast Emily Browning as Laura and that worked too. And on the forums someone asked me to do a cast list and I came up with Carey Mulligan as Laura (there's a link on my MTA page on the forums if you're interested), but it was a bit of a random process coming up with her. So no, I don't really have an image of her, sorry.

As for an unrated version, well even if I did post that on another site I wouldn't be allowed to direct you to that due to the site rules here on hpff. And you need to take into account that it's written in the first person and Laura's far too coy to go into too much detail anyway. However, I have written that scene in the Shrieking Shack from Sirius' POV (I've done a lot of those in an attempt to get characterisation right) and, while it would need a tweak to meet the ToS, if you email me via the forums I could send it to you that way. (Once it's been cleaned up, of course - it's in no state to be shared with anyone at the moment.)

Right. The war. Yes, they are taking it lightly, but then again as you've noticed it hasn't really affected them personally yet. Hogwarts is very sheltered from that perspective. But I can work on bringing it home that little bit more in an attempt to rectify that - thanks for pointing it out! :D

Thanks again for the great review - I love the long ones, they really make me think about this fic. Next chapter should be up Wed at the latest.

cheers, Mel

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Review #20, by KateRhodes 

13th February 2010:
I absolutely love this storY! It's taken me long to read it all but I am very happy I did! I enjoy it very much!
Update soon =)
Lots of love,

Author's Response: Hi Kate! Thanks for the review! I do love getting reviews from new people ... actually, I love all reviews, but you know what I mean.

Yes, I can understand it taking a while to read this story - I'm the first to admit that I went a bit oveboard while writing it. But these things happen. And I update about every 5-7 days generally so the next chapter is due by Wednesday at the latest. I'm not sure when I'll have time to get online but it will be sometime around then. In any case I'm very pleased that you're enjoying it.

thanks again, Mel

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Review #21, by vengeance 

13th February 2010:
I'm so slack for reviewing these days, i'm sorry!
This chapter was good, I'm glad that Laura knows about Remus' "Furry little problem."
Sirius and her are just the cutest couple, I love their little cute moments they have - they make my heart melt.
And as for your Sirius, he's risen up in my books to my second favourite character. Well, though, I s'pose he could almost tie first, haha! He's sexy ;)
Magnificant writing as usual, and as usual, I look forward to seeing this updated :)

-jaid :)

Author's Response: Hi again!

Ah, don't apologise for not reviewing for a while, we all have real lives which get in the way with that sort of thing. :D And yes, finally Laura knows everything. I needed something that killed off her insecurities once and for all and this was as good as anything. :D

And wow, Sirius could almost tie for your favourite character? I'm impressed. I never thought I'd be so successful in converting people! But yeah, he is rather dishy isn't he? (Though, if I didn't think that, would I have written this in the first place?)

cheers, Mel

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Review #22, by Pixileanin 

13th February 2010:
Revelations indeed!
I really liked the content in this chapter. As always, you have great ideas and good flow.

Today, I have to rag on the protagonist. Laura dear, I know how understanding your boyfriend is when you speak your mind, but don't you realize by now that it's bad form to bring up an ex boyfriend when you're on a date?!?

And as much as I liked the content (because I really do!) I got the feeling when I was reading the dialogue that Sirius and Laura were incredibly explanatory. Which I'm sure they were supposed to be. But I think I would have preferred a little less explanation and more realization. There was realization in there, I just would have preferred more. I don't even know if that makes any sense.

Oooh! I have a favorite line!

He leaned over and put his face in my hair, inhaling deeply. "And that."

Because I'm feeling sappy and all.

Author's Response: Hi again! Thanks for reviewing! :D

I had to laugh at your comment about bringing up exes when you're on a date - to be honest, I hadn't really thought of that Hogsmeade visit as a date. I guess that once a relationship is established I don't count anything as a date any more: to me, dates are part of the preliminaries of a relationship rather than something that happens several months in. But, I guess it could be called that, in which case you are of course correct. But Laura's a bit naive in a lot of ways so I guess that's coming out there.

As for realisation vs explanation, well I suppose you have a point there too. I had thought that a lot of what was going through Laura's mind was realisation but then again it was all spelled out in the dialogue so yes, it was explanation in that sense. I'll have a think about it and see how I can improve the scene - thanks for pointing it out! :)

cheers, Mel

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Review #23, by Erratic Amethyst 

12th February 2010:
Haha. :) Awesome chapter. I was wondering when Sirius was finally going to let it all out. -And right after making love... somehow I find that adorable.

She gave herself to him, and he gave in to her; marauder secrets and all. ;)

Excellent chapter!! And I'm so glad you are sitll updating frequently. Yours' is the only one of my favorite story's that has such continually quick updates, and I totally love it!

Anywho, great chapter as always!! Beautiful scene when Sirius 'redecorated' the Shreaking Shack, although I can't help but long for a little more in the 'love' scene area. lol but that is totally up to you.

Laura and Sirius get quite a bit of a mouthful of each other as it is, I suppose. -Sorry, I'll stop rambling. Thanks for the update!! And have a marvelous weekend.

Author's Response: Hi again! Thanks for the lovely review! :D

Yes, it all came out in this chapter (I guess in more ways than one hahaha) - I needed to finally kill off Laura's insecurities and having him lay it all out like that was intended to be instrumental in that.

As for more in the "love scene" area, well there are two things to take into account with that. First of all, saying too much would contravene the ToS and I have no intention of doing that - anything explicit isn't allowed and I've grown rather fond of my Trusted Author status. And secondly, this is first person from Laura's POV and she's far too coy to go into any detail on that sort of thing. As far as she's concerned, you know it happened and that's quite enough information, thank you very much. So those are my excuses for the lack of detail on that front. :)

cheers, Mel

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Review #24, by natrox14 

12th February 2010:
It was pretty good, but... I don't know. The previous two chapters have seemed a little boring, you know? They were both fillers, and I'm waiting for something big to happen.
Also, lately Laura has annoyed me. I don't know quite what it is, but it's been really frustrating.

Anyway... sorry if you think this review is a little harsh, because I'm usually, you know, singing your praises and all ;)

Author's Response: Hi Nat!

No, don't apologise. There is no rule that says that you have to like every chapter of my story. And yes, there was a lot of filler in the past 2 chapters (and fluff), but this one was more important, even if there was very little revealed that you as readers didn't already know.

As for something big, well unfortunately I can't give out any hints about that but I understand how you feel. The same goes for Laura, though she's just about killed off all those insecurities now - otherwise the main action last chapter wouldn't have happened.

Anyway, no, not harsh, and I need reviews like this anyway because they tell me what you're looking for and help me improve as a writer. So thank youi!

cheers, Mel

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Review #25, by Sinelle 

12th February 2010:
Hello hello! Ohh I liked this chapter haha! Oh, not that I have a dirty mind or anything haha, no, I mean the part where Laura learns the Marauders' and Remus' secrets.. lol.. I'm glad she finally learned it all.. It was really frustrating for me that part of the reason she and Sirius had problems was because she didn't know everything.. thank goodness thats over haha! Will you be putting in a talk between Remus and Laura about this? I mean, now that she knows, he'll have to hear straight from her that shes ok with it right? And after reading your Author's note I gotta say the haha! you're right about the 'Pete's a rat' line! Lol. Anyway, this is a long review hehe, please update soon! I can't wait to read more!

Author's Response: Hi again! Thanks for the review! :D

Don't worry, I never thought you had a dirty mind. But yes, now she knows everything - like you said it was a big part of why they had difficulties in the first place. As for a talk with Remus, well sorry but I'm not telling. That would be a spoiler, wouldn't it? But he was pretty sure she'd be okay with it anyway, otherwise he'd never have given the green light in the first place.

Next chapter will be up Wednesday at the latest.

cheers, Mel

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