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50 Reviews Found

Review #1, by nott theodore 

8th July 2014:
You might think that this chapter comes across as a bit of a filler chapter but I do think there was some really important parts to be found in it, and I found it really interesting to read as well. I really liked the way that you manage to intermingle the normality of everyday school life and then bring in the horror of the war and some of the other worse, more tragic sides. The fact that Slughorn invited Bellatrix and her husband to come to one of his parties is simply horrendous, but to be honest I could imagine him doing it because he doesn't necessarily think about what's right and wrong as long as it's got the most benefit for him - he doesn't want to get involved in the war, but this way, he's under Dumbledore's protection and keeping links with Death Eaters too. It's understandable how angry everyone was, though!

Poor Lily, to hear that her mother's got worse, and so soon after James lost his father. I feel like she probably has to prepare herself for the worst eventually, but it must be so hard for her being away from home at this time. I liked the way that they got revenge on the Slytherins for what they'd said, but again, it was another reminder of how close the war has come and the prejudices there which are so deep-rooted.

Sian :)
Gryffindor House Cup 2014 Review

Author's Response: I had to have the attempted recruitment of James and Lily in there somewhere, and I really liked the idea of Bella being invited to a Slug Club meeting because, as you said, it really does sound like something he'd do. But then I had the issue of Sirius not being there (I haven't seen her since I was 16, I think was the quote from canon) so I had him skive off the Club meeting, kind of like Harry does in HBP. :) Glad you think I worked that through okay.

And yeah, poor Lily. It really must suck, especially (as you said) so soon after James' dad passed.

cheers Mel


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Review #2, by Maurader_Girl007 

11th November 2012:
Hmmm... yah kind of fillerish and boring :( Sorry but yeah thats what I thought. Getting a bit lame. Hope it picks up...

Author's Response: Yes, I know. It happens, I'm afraid. It does pick up, though, so I hope you keep reading.

cheers, Mel


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Review #3, by Lillylover22 

2nd March 2012:
Good chapter but not your best 8/10 : )

Author's Response: Fair enough. There are a few fillers in here, I'm the first to admit.

cheers, Mel


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Review #4, by singer123 

15th December 2011:
I think Bernie and Elvira should hook up!!
Seriously! That would be like the end to all problems!
Except the war, of course.

Author's Response: Yes, the war is always a bit of a dampener, isn't it? As for Bernie and Elvira, well I won't say anything about that. It was a popular idea though! :)

cheers, Mel


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Review #5, by classicblack 

23rd October 2011:
The chapter title is quite fitting- nice job! I like how you're still incorporating the fan club into the story. Can't wait to see if Bernia and Elvira actually do end up together haha
Until next chapter,
classicblack

Author's Response: Hmmm, Elvira and Bernie? Not sure how much they have in common (though they are both Ravenclaws), but it woudl have been fun watching them complaining about my main pairing. And I'm very pleased that you liked the chapter title because, as a rule, I'm not very good at titles in general, so invariably I just grab the first thing that sounds half-decent and run with it. So thank you!

cheers, Mel


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Review #6, by In The Shadows I Dwell 

11th August 2011:
What an interesting take on the Death Eater's attempting to recruit James and Lily, I never imagined that Slughorn would have favoured Bellatrix LeStrange, but I suppose it would make sense, she comes from a wealthy and old pureblood family, and a lot of people seemed to fit the Slughorn Future Star mould simply on that basis alone. I also thought it was interesting that they attempted to recruit students at his party, and was a great link to how Regulus joined up, which would make a lot of sense considering he was rather young when he did.

I really like how you've managed to tie a lot into this chapter, I really do love all the Quidditch talk you include in this story, and the bits and pieces here and there which really do remind us that these are dark times, and the actual presence of Death Eaters at Hogwarts? Well it's no wonder Dumbledore was furious, it was an intriguing idea having them linked to Slughorn, it would make sense that some of his favourites would attempt to recruit him in later life...

Another brilliant chapter, even if you aren't particularly thrilled by the chapter, I sure was!

- Ash (InTheShadowsIDwell)
(Gryffindor)

Author's Response: You never thought Sluggy would have liked Bella? A brilliant witch from the Black family? I thought it was obvious, hahaha. :) And you can't deny that she was very successful in her chosen field, even if that was torturing and killing people. :p Anyway, it seemed to me a good way of having the approach made to James and Lily, considering we know it happened at some stage.

Anyway I'm really pleased that you liked this chapter because, as I said, I thought it wasn't really up to standard. Then again, we're always the most critical about our own work, right?

cheers, Mel


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Review #7, by girly1393 

6th June 2011:
Quidditch World Cup! I want so badly to go to New York to see it this November, but as I'm still in high school, I don't think my parents'll go for it. For shame.

I'm gonna love them with their Quidditch "feuds".

Bravo to you.

Author's Response: Ah, Quidditch when you can't fly just isn't the same, I don't think. But good luck in getting there. :) And I'm very glad you're still enjoying this, it is VERY long so it's really gratifying when people read the whole thing. Thank you!

cheers, Mel


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Review #8, by theelderwand 

23rd August 2010:
Some filler, but every chapter can't be chuck full of life ending plot points - a story is a living thing, it has to be allowed to inhale and exhale.

That said, I loved Sirius giving it to old Sluggy about his lack of respect for Laura. That was definitely long overdue.

Death Eaters recruiting at the Slug Club? Can't say I'm surprised, but it was a great flourish. I wonder if the end of the slug club won't lead to Slughorn leaving the job.

REally surprised James didn't hex the SLytherins that said those awful things about Lily. But, I did like the revenge via Snivellus - too bad the git wasn't hurt worse!



Still completely engrossed.

Eldy

Author's Response: You know, I had all sorts of problems making the Lily-and-James-get-approached-to-join-the-DEs fit this story, probably because I wanted Bella to do the recruiting. I get these ideas in my head and they can be hard to dislodge, hahaha. So when I came up with the Slug Club as a recruitment forum I breathed a sigh of relief, because it was something I could really see Slughorn doing. And, like you said (and others came up with the same idea), it's a good reason for Sluggy to have left the school, if the Slug Club was disbanded.

Aside from that, pretty much all of this chapter was filler, though the mudblood comments were, dare I say it, quite fun to write. Does that make me a horrible person? Probably, LOL. Glad you liked it though. :)

cheers, Mel


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Review #9, by Capella Black 

15th August 2010:
Well, I like this chapter, even if you don't. Again, the plotline came across as realistic, rather than manufactured, as you had Lily's mum's health gradually deteriorating, but no sudden dramatics. I also liked the fact that Laura and Sirius' admirers haven't given up on them, despite the solidity of their relationship at this point. To be honest, I'm at a loss as to how you're going to end this piece without going off canon! Still, only one way to find out...

Author's Response: Ah, filler chapters. I'm still not all that pleased with this one but it seems to have gone down okay so I'm happy with that. As for the ending ... my lips are sealed. Though I know you've read that far now so even if I did say something it wouldn't be a spoiler. :D

cheers, Mel


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Review #10, by doglover 

13th August 2010:
she needs to hang out w/ mary more.

Author's Response: Hi again!

Yes, the friendship with Mary is suffering, but that does happen when your respective partners aren't close. They're making an effort to spend time with each other though and that's the main thing. :)

cheers, Mel


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Review #11, by HermioneTwin44 

10th July 2010:
Stop being so hard on yourself this is awesome!

Author's Response: Aw, thanks for that. From memory the story wasn't getting that great a reaction at the time this was posted and I understood that things were a little drab on the drama front so that was what prompted that author note. However (as you have now seen) there was a lot of drama in the last 10 chapters so hopefully that made up for it. :)

cheers, Mel


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Review #12, by i LUV JAMES P II 

8th April 2010:
(pure laziness that im not logging in) Well, this is me after reading for, maybe 11 hours straight. 7PM-6:30AM...and now I'm exhausted and will be a finishing at around say 2PM this afternoon. They were right when they gave you the 'most addicting' dobby. I certainly am addicted. The only thing that slightly bothers me is Laura's insecurities about all things Sirius...it's borderline ridiculous, like Bella Swan Ridiculous (no offense meant if ur a twitard) Other than that FABOO storyyy! (:

Author's Response: Hi! Thanks for the review! :D

First of all, I've never read Twilight (or seen the films) so I really don't know anything about Bella, but I didn't intend to make Laura borderline ridiculous. I think it's just because she had trouble understanding just how much things had actually changed from fifth year (and all the years before that). But yeah, point taken.

Aside from that I'm really pleased you like the story so much. I did put a lot of work into it so having people appreciate that really is reassuring. Thank you! *beams*

cheers, Mel


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Review #13, by always_dreaming 

26th March 2010:
i think i might go to bed. im really tempted to stay up and finish the story but i really need to make an appearance away from the computed :/ the chapter didn't seem disjointed to me. but i am really tired ha so idk. i thought the matchmaking was interesting

Author's Response: Hi again!

Ah, I certainly don't blame you for going to bed, with each chapter at about 5000 words it can take a while to read. But I do appreciate your taking the time to review each one, I really do. I'm just sorry that it's taking me so long to respond to them all :(

Anyway, thanks for saying it didn't feel too disjointed, because when I posted this chapter I wasn't happy with it at all. Of course, it could be your sleep-deprived state which is making the assessment, but even so it does make me feel better.

cheers, Mel


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Review #14, by ochalke5 

8th March 2010:
Well, well well, I know, I know, it's been freakin' ages since I've dropped a review in this little box. But have no fear, I am back and of course I shall read and reivew all of your updated chapter, in time. So do not fret, I shall reivew.

Now, back to the story.

I like how things are going. Sirius and Laura are so cute. I love that they are all in love and stuff. James and Lily and wonderful as well. It was an interesting chapter, of course. And the story it going good. I really like how you seem to nail down the people so well. This story is wonderful and I can't wait to see what happens next. Of course you know how wonderfullly brilliant your story is, but I will tell you anyways, Your story is awesome, I can't wait to see where you take it next.

Really good job Mel. I can't wait to see what happens in these next few chapters.
10/10
Truly wonderful.
Natalie

Author's Response: Hi Natalie! Thanks for the review! And I'm really sorry that it's taken me a while to respond to you but the last chapter I posted had a bit of an intense cliffy so that's sparked a lot of reviews for me to get through. But, I'm managing to do it slowly but surely. And don't apologise for not reviewing for a while because I'm just happy that you're reading and reviewing my story at all. :)

Anyway, I'm glad you liked this chapter! I actually think that this one and the next few are a little too filler-ish in a lot of ways, but there's a fair bit coming so hopefully you'll bear with me. But yeah, my main couples are pretty cute, aren't they? I'm a real romantic at heart so that's manifesting through this story. It's great to see that other people are like that too :D

cheers, Mel


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Review #15, by desert_oasis 

1st March 2010:
Yay another chapter!!! I'm so loving my new house!! Just put my son to bed so I could read this. Going to try to read the rest as soon as I can.

But I have to see when I'm free from the boyfriend and our son, lol.

Good job, I love this chapter, it always brightens my day when I find out I have time to read a chapter!!

Author's Response: Hi again!

Great to see you are slowly catching up - I guess that i'ts partly my fault as well for posting chapters so quickly. And be warned that the next few might feel a little flat so my apologies for that in advance. But I'm thrilled that you're still enjoying it and I can put a smile on your face in what must be a difficult time - it's hard enough with a baby without moving house as well. My thoughts are with you :D

cheers, Mel


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Review #16, by Singer Of All Songs 

7th February 2010:
It was a bit of a filler, but with out them a story would go by much to fast. Also i did quite enjoy this chapter the humor was lovely and you put in a couple of awesome ideas. For instense the whole Slughorn-Laura-Sirius business could end up being very interesting if you fallowed that through, and the idea of Elivria and Bernie! Thats gold!

Anyway, there more continuation ideas for you, but it really was great, most certainly not up to your usual slandered, but thats still far better then most stories could hope for.

Can't wait

-Singer :3

Author's Response: Hi again!

Yes, very filler I'm afraid, but I'm glad you enjoyed it regardless. And it did have to be in there, if nothing else than for the recruitment-of-James-and-Lily thing. As for your thoughts about what could come up, well of course my lips are sealed. You'll see what (if anything) comes of those. *evil grin*

And I'm so glad the humour came off! That can be harder to get right than you'd think, something to do with everyone finding different things funny. :)

cheers, Mel


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Review #17, by GlynnisGriffiths 

7th February 2010:
First let me apologize for reading your entire story and only just reviewing now. But, in my defence, I only found it yesterday, so I've been glued to my computer reading it. :) It was the perfect diversion from the blizzard we were having outside.

So, onto the story itself - I really, really appreciate your attention to canon and to detail here. I'm sort of a canon-nazi, so it's very refreshing to find a story that works so hard to stick to the parameters that we've got for the 'marauder era'. I enjoy your interpretation of canon characters - James, Sirius, and Lily especially seem spot-on, and your original characters as well. Laura herself is very appealing. I think my favourite of all, though, is how you've portrayed Mary - she's sweet, and funny, with a bit of a wicked sense of humour.

I was struck in chapter 46(?) by the encounter between Sirius and Regulus - Sirius' mercurial attitude towards his brother - quick to both anger and forgiveness (of a sort) was very well done. His optimism that Reg would come around was heartening, but I think it also helps inform his bitterness that we see in the Tapestry scene of Order of the Phoenix, while talking to Harry, when it's clear that he doesn't know that Reg *did* come around. And I was thinking about all of that - the way you'd tied together information from the different books, just to inform how Sirius would behave in this particular situation, as I read it. Terribly impressive, and also a surprisingly moving scene because of all that back- and fore-ground.

So, now that I've established that I read *way* too much into stuff, and babbled for a long time, I'll shut up. But I promise to be a better reviewer from now on, and I can't wait to read what happens next!

Author's Response: Hi Glynnis! Thanks for the review! I do love getting reviews from new people ... actually, I love all reviews, but you know what I mean. *grins*

I'm very pleased that you appreciate my attempts to stick to canon - the idea for the story was to have something that would slot into what canon we do have for that era without too much difficulty, and it sounds like you think I've achieved that so that's fantastic. Thank you! I too am a bit of a canon nerd, which you have probably realised, and a lot of effort went into making this story as authentic as possible (for want of a better word). And thanks for saying such lovely things about my characterisation, because I did put a lot of work into that, studying the turns of phrase and mannerisms of the canon characters to try to get it right. As for Mary, well so many people are so fond of her that I'm starting to think that maybe I should have set Sirius up with her! I do admit to being rather fond of Laura, though, which was why she got the job as my protagonist rather than Mary. *grins*

Ah, yes, Regulus. I've had a few people comment on their relationship in this story because apparently (I say apparently because I don't read a lot of other fanfic, I'm afraid) most stories have them as sworn enemies. I just couldn't see it like that, though, because if there was no attachment at all there then it didn't make sense that Sirius would do some digging after Regulus died to try to find out what had happened. So I'm especially pleased that you, as another canon nerd, think that I got that right. Thank you! *beams, then feels like that's not enough so does a little dance*

And don't worry, you don't read *way* too much into things, because I do the same thing. So if it's strange, we can be strange together.

cheers, Mel


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Review #18, by Ginny 

6th February 2010:
It's a good chapter, but definitely not one of your best. It was a little too much fluff for my taste. The actual writing, however, was excellent as always. :)
Looking forward to the next update! I am so addicted to this fanfic!

Author's Response: Hi there! Thanks for the review!

You know, it's funny that you thought this was a fluffy chapter because I didn't think there was much fluff in it at all. Not compared to the last one, at least. But I do agree that it's not one of the better chapters of this story, hence the apology in the author note.

Next chapter - which I hope will be more to your liking - should be up around midweek sometime.

cheers, Mel


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Review #19, by P Black 

6th February 2010:
That was a really good chapter! Love it!

Author's Response: Hi again! Thanks for the review!

Ah, I'm glad you liked it because, as my author note said, I didn't think it was really up to standard. However, if my readers thought it was okay then that has to be a good thing. :D

Next one should be up midweek sometime.

cheers, Mel


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Review #20, by Quill 

6th February 2010:
Yep, a bit fillerish but not to bad, because a lot happens ;)
I love the conversation in the dorm and how they welcomed Mary...
hope Elvira and Bernie work out, poor Laura she could do witha break...

Author's Response: Hi there! Thanks for the review! :D

Yes, very filler-ish I'm afraid, but I'm glad you enjoyed it anyway, especially the conversation in the dorm.

As for Elvira & Bernie, well my lips are sealed. You'll see how that pans out if you keep on reading.

cheers, Mel


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Review #21, by Kassi 

5th February 2010:
I love your story! It came at just the right time. I needed a happy couple in my life, even if they are fictional. But I loved the idea of Bernie and Elvira. That would be hilarious! The whole chapter was good, not really disjointed at all. Keep up the amazing work! I'm going to be so sad when you're done.

Author's Response: Hi again! Thanks for the review! :D

Well, I'm glad that my happy couple could fill a void for you, even though like you said they're fictional. And thank you for saying it didn't feel too disjointed ... I still think it is, but maybe I'm my own harshest critic. As for Bernie and Elvira ... well, I can't promise it will happen (or that it won't), but yeah, it would be funny, wouldn't it?

And I'm not sure if I've mentioned this to you before but I've written a number of one-shots based around this story, mostly from Sirius' POV, which I've been talked into loading up as a short story collection once this story is all loaded up. So even though we're getting towards the end now there will be that coming up afterwards ... for some reason, it seems that some other people don't want it to end either. *blushes*

Next chapter will be up sometime around the middle of the week. Now all I have to do is hope you like that one too!

cheers, Mel


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Review #22, by dominicancat 

5th February 2010:
lol i thought this chapter was great and enjoyed it a lot. Keep up the good work =0)

Author's Response: Hi again! Thanks for the review! :D

Ah, I'm so glad you liked it. Like I said in the author note I thought this one wasn't really up to standard but I couldn't get it any better so it had to stay for the time being. But if my readers don't think it's too bad then I guess I can't complain :D

Next one is due to be posted sometime around mid week again.

cheers, Mel


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Review #23, by Pixileanin 

5th February 2010:
Wow! Laura's happy two chapters in a row! (just teasing!)

It's nice to see Laura's self-assurance developing now. It took a while, but all good things do, I guess. She seems much more relaxed now (probably from all the fluff.. good stuff, that fluff!) I especially liked that her character is still in partial denial (or oblivious) that other boys may have been interested in her. It shows that she's not quite as confident as she could be and still needs to work on her self-worth.

Getting Snape to go after Avery was great! And then having the boys realize that he was much harsher than they would have been shows his character.

You got me curious with Elvira now. I'd been expecting something more grand from her, so I guess I'll just have to wait on that one.

The Quidditch discussion was fun. It seems ages ago since I've seen Laura and Sirius banter playfully.

I thought the flow was fine, for me. I enjoyed the plot movement all around and seeing what everyone else was up to, especially the girls!

Good one!

Author's Response: Hi again!

Yes, two chapters in a row. I feel like calling in the Guinness Book of Records. :D And yeah, her self confidence is getting a bit of a boost, but then again, like you pointed out, having someone like Sirius Black telling you how wonderful you are all the time would have to help in that regard. And she is really working on her self esteem, too, so that's also having an impact as well. But yes, there is still some way to go. This is after all a coming-of-age story so her maturing is a big part of that.

I'm glad you liked the Snape/Avery incident and the Quidditch discussion ... the timing was right for a World Cup, so I thought it would work as a good distraction from everything else to have a bit of a chat about sport for a while. As for Elvira, well a few people have been waiting for something truly heinous (another reviewer's word, not mine) so this was a bit of a stepping stone to her biggest effort on that front.

cheers, Mel


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Review #24, by Blue Biro 

5th February 2010:
don't put yourself down1 it wasn't tpopo fillerish or disjointed, any chapter by you is bloody brilliant! thanks for updating! :)

100/10 as ALWAYS!

Author's Response: Hi Becky! Thanks for reviewing again! :D

Aw, thanks! I stand by it feeling like filler (well, okay, it WAS mostly filler) but if it didn't come off that way then I'm very grateful. It's one reason I love reviewers so much, because you are so helpful in pulling me back up again. :)

Next chapter will be up sometime around the middle of the week. Not sure when yet, but sometime.

cheers, Mel


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Review #25, by shadowcat2 

5th February 2010:
hey, I love this story.A great chapter!The only thing that I was wondering about is Lily being asked to join the dark side which i found odd since she is a muggleborn.Thanks for the entertaining story.The updates always makes my day!

Author's Response: Hi there! Thanks for the review!

Ah, the Lily recruitment thing. While I understand your confusion, that's actually canon - JKR has said that Voldemort tried to recruit both Lily and James before they'd finished school and their refusal counted as one of the three times they defied him, to make them fit the prophecy. So, even though she was Muggle born, Lily clearly had something that the Death Eaters thought would be useful on their side. I can't tell you what it was, though, since the recruitment thing wasn't my idea, which was one reason I kept Laura away from that particular encounter.

Anyway I'm really pleased you're enjoying my story. Next chapter should be up sometime around mid week I think.

cheers, Mel


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