57 Reviews Found

Review #1, by nott theodore 

8th July 2014:
I'm glad that Laura's got someone like Lily around who can sort of share the experience of going out with one of the Marauders, because it must be strange for any girl when they're going out with one of the boys from that group, who are all so closely knit. But it's good that Lily trusts James and is there to look after Laura and persuade her they're not doing anything bad; obviously she doesn't know about Remus yet and the fact that they help with his transformations.

I feel so, so sorry for James to find out that his father's died from Dragon Pox. It's such a sudden death and the news must have been awful to take, both for him and Sirius as well who was like their second son. However, I like the fact that you're slowly working in the details that their parents die before James and Lily do as it means that it doesn't seem as sudden or dramatic. I feel sorry for Laura having to deal with the fan club too, it's going to be a lot worse still, I think! But it's great that the boys are teaching Laura and Lily duelling - it shows how much they care about them and it's going to be good for them to practise and be able to defend themselves too.

Sian :)
Gryffindor House Cup 2014 Review

Author's Response: Yes, Lily is a much underused resource in this. Laura really should talk to her more often, don't you think? *grins* And yeah, dragon pox. It's since come out that James' dad didn't die till after he and Lily were married, so I've taken that out of the revised version. But yeah, parents had to die, so this was me starting that process off.

cheers Mel

 Report Review

Review #2, by Anonymous 

19th June 2013:
Loved the opening! When you ended the last chapter I was disappointed that they were breaking up again, so soon.

I did feel like James' dad died rather suddenly, and I feel like that is something that would have had a long-lasting impact, but I see why you did it.

Author's Response: Yes, it's hard to cover something like a parent's death adequately, but then again Laura was quite removed from that event so I thought that, given it was from her POV, it was about all I could do. Sure, it had a lasting effect on James and also Sirius, but she didn't see that so much as they didn't show much of it to her.

cheers, Mel

 Report Review

Review #3, by Lillylover22 

2nd March 2012:
I love how protective they are 9/10 : )

Author's Response: Yep. Gotta love those boys and their protectiveness and loyalty. :)

cheers, Mel

 Report Review

Review #4, by classicblack 

23rd October 2011:
Dueling lessons are a bit of a cliche, don't you think? But I actually sort of like it. The fan club is still making me laugh :)
Until next chapter,

Author's Response: Are they a cliche? I admit that I haven't read a whole lot of other fanfiction so I don't always know what they are, but I think you're the first person who's mentioned that they are. In any case, with a war going on, I think that it's pretty understandable to have them - it's not unlike the DA in the second war, just on a smaller scale (and I admit for different reasons). As for the fan club, well they're worth their weight in gold from a writer's perspective. Glad you appreciate them! :D

cheers, Mel

 Report Review

Review #5, by mrs_remus_john_lupin 

5th September 2011:
great chapter, but your authors note sounds ominous... do you mean there is another break up along the line???
please let me just be paranoid ;)

Author's Response: Teehee. I like being cagey in author notes, people get so panicky. *evil grin* I think you've read to the end now so you know the answer, but I won't answer it here anyway. Spoilers, you know. :) Thanks for the review though!

cheers, Mel

 Report Review

Review #6, by In The Shadows I Dwell 

10th August 2011:
Thank goodness, for a moment I feared the worst, but it seems I had no reason to panic luckily. I was very much excited to see that the boys are giving Lily and Laura duelling lessons, that was always my favourite part of the second movie so hence my love of reading scenes based around them. I also love how you managed to draw Sirius and Laura back together, there are so many aspects to their relationship, and so many different ways which they are drawn back together, it's hard to imagine them apart at all now.

That and I think the wild rumours about what was pierced into Sirius' skin, or tattooed for that matter were a lovely touch and reminded me so much of Ginny being asked whether Harry had a tattoo. It seems that admirers can be something of a problem for the boys of Hogwarts, particularly Sirius'. I feel almost sorry for all his past girlfriends having to put up with their ridiculous behaviour...

On to the next chapter, and I have to say I'm relieved it's not another cliff-hanger...

- Ash (InTheShadowsIDwell)

Author's Response: Ah.,duelling lessons. It did seem to be the sort of thing those boys would do, and it fit with my narrative so I did it. And yeah, I did get inspired by that scene in HBP - there are some correlations between my Sirius and Harry in that book (including the fan club,hehehe) which you've picked up on, but hey, I figured that if it was good enough for JKR ...

cheers, Mel

 Report Review

Review #7, by LivingLife42 

25th July 2011:
Okay. I hate when they fight. And I want to get mad at you for making them fight but I can't because I realized I probably would have acted the same way as Laura did. She is insecure and she doesn't want to get hurt. You are sticking to her character very well. Same with Sirius'. Well done :) I'm glad they made up though.

Are they going to get to duel more?

Love this story :)

Author's Response: Hi again!

Yes, I don't like them fighting either, but as you noticed it is within character for them to do so in certain situations. And this was one of them, I thought. However, this one didn't last long (as you saw) which was, I thought, how it should be. :D

And yes, there will definitely be more duelling. All in good time though.

cheers, Mel

 Report Review

Review #8, by girly1393 

6th June 2011:
Ah, I probably ought to sleep. Summer class starts tomorrow bright and early, but I'm nervous. First time in a college course and all. I'm all jittery and I figured this was a lovely distraction.

Dueling, ah how I wish for thee. Seriously, I really want to have a magic duel, have since the second movie (mostly to knock a jerk like Malfoy on his butt).

Bravo to you.

Author's Response: Good luck at summer class! And I'm glad I was able to take your mind off it for at least a little while, . :D

And yeah, magic duels do sound fun. So long as the other person doesn't know (or use) enough magic to do you any permanent damage, that is!


 Report Review

Review #9, by theelderwand 

23rd August 2010:
Well, I wasn't overly concerned that this would turn into a disaster. Glad I was proved right. Surprised that Lily didn't know about Reums' "furry little problem"- kinda figured that she did already.

Now, here's an instance of brilliant minds thinking alike. In the Crusadiverse, (Battle of the Pitch, specifically) Harry and Ron come to the realization that Ginny and Hermione need to go through the Auror training for precisely the same reason James and Sirius train Lily and Laura. Great flourish.

I was also glad to see Sirius finally going after the gigglers. Laura deserves him sticking up for her like that, even tho she can take care of herself.

Figured the Potters would start dying off about now. Good flourish to have them be older - better than having them die in the war, in my opinion.

Great stuff, once again, Mel!


Author's Response: As I said in the last response, I'm so glad that at least SOMEONE realised this wasn't a huge deal. It was never meant to be - a stumbling block, yes, but nothing to go into excessive dramas about. And you were right - Lily did know about Remus - she's just good at lying to make other people feel better.

I laughed when I read taht you'd trained Ginny and Hermione up as warriors, too - you're right, great minds think alike. It just seemed what they would do when the war was going as strong as it was in the background, always with the caveat that it was to be a last resort only. Nothing like being protective! *grins*

And yes, the gigglers needed to have a good talking to eventually, and now seemed as good a time as any.

cheers, Mel

 Report Review

Review #10, by Capella Black 

15th August 2010:
You are most definitely forgiven for the cliff hanger. This was a great way of showing how Laura is developing, and maturing, which is of course essential in a coming-of-age story. It was also essential for my nerves, which really couldn't take much more miscommunication!

I adored the different rumours you came up with - very HP appropriate. They reminded me of the ones about Harry in HBP, but without being too similar. Really nice touch that, once again keeping the feel of the story both realistic and magical.

And nice touch to have the boys training the girls on duelling - again echoing things that happen in HP, but without being too similar. Also helps to broaden the story, and remind the reader about the wider events of the times. Awesome awesomeness.

As ever, must click...

Author's Response: I fully admit I was inspired by the rumours in HBP for this section, but it seemed appropriate - what school doesn't talk about people in that way? I found it a challenge to make them different enough though so I'm glad you think I pulled that off. :)

As for the duelling, well it just had to happen, didn't it? With those circumstances, especially externally, I thought it was a really James-and-Sirius thing to do. :)

cheers, Mel

 Report Review

Review #11, by doglover 

13th August 2010:
deuling lessons are good for them.

Author's Response: Hi again!

Yes, I thought it was important that Lily and Laura learned how to fight. With the war getting ever nastier it was only a matter of time before they were taught, I think. And what better teachers than those two boys? :)

cheers, Mel

 Report Review

Review #12, by ericajen 

28th July 2010:
That's awful all the deaths and such they were reading about. I like the way you tie in the war into the story without it being too forced or awkward or worst of all: nonexistent.

Author's Response: Yes, like you I hate Marauder fics where the war is non-existent. If it's supposed to be a parody, fine,but generally they do have a few nods to canon and in those cases I get very frustrated when the war isn't mentioned. These kids left school and joined a mercenary group immediately - the war HAD to have an impact on them. And the impact gets greater the longer the story goes on. Glad you appreciate it!

cheers, Mel

 Report Review

Review #13, by always_dreaming 

26th March 2010:
okay so this might have been the last chapter, but i love that mcgonagall (sorry i have no idea how to spell that) approves of their relationship. and thank goodness they didn't split- that would have been super annoying. again, what's going on with the other girls? you don't write much about them but you talk about how charlotte is close with laura. is martha not close to her?

Author's Response: Hi again!

I'm very glad you liked the little McGonagall cameo, I thought that was a nice inclusion. It just felt like something she'd say, you know? So thank you! :D As for the other girls, well they're not in the story so much at the moment because Laura's not paying them an awful lot of attention, to tell the truth. And I don't think I mentioned Laura being close to Charlotte - actually, I think I said that they weren't hugely close, which was one reason Laura didn't confide in her. Laura still sees Martha and Charlotte as being more Lily's friends than her friends and while she's happy to do the girl talk and that sort of thing with them she's not going to tell them her secrets. I hope that makes sense! *goes back into story to try to work out where she's indicated Laura and Charlotte are close*

cheers, Mel

 Report Review

Review #14, by JeanSyrotS 

7th February 2010:
that scene with Laura egging the gigglers on, adding to the Sirius rumers? that was osum. O-S-U-M...:)

Author's Response: Hi again!

Yes, I was rather proud of that myself, especially the idea that Sirius would have a tattoo that said "mother" - how incongruous would that be? So I'm very pleased that you liked it, we must have similar senses of humour. :D

cheers, Mel

 Report Review

Review #15, by desert_oasis 

30th January 2010:
Good chapter! I love it!!! It's hard to get on the net, but I'm doing it :)

Sorry I'm falling behind in reading, its been freaking crazy. We moved to Shawnee from OKC, but then my bf's uncle and I got into a really BAD fight, yelling and what not, so he said it wasn't going to work out and ordered me to leave but said that my bf could stay, which he said where i go him and our son goes. So we found a cute house in Tuttle, now we are waiting for the ice to thaw from the storm so we can move.

This is to much freaking drama, I thought I had left highschool behind.

Author's Response: Hi again!

Wow, you have been having a rough time of it. Hopefully the snow will thaw soon and you'll be able to get out. In any case I hope that my story has been able to provide you with a distraction from it all! And no worries about falling behind, we all have real lives and not everyone has time to read this every week. I understand that.

Anyway I'm very pleased that you're still enjoying it and I hope you like what's to come.

cheers, Mel

 Report Review

Review #16, by LilyLunaLovegood 

27th January 2010:
Gah! Can't wait for the next chapter! This story is phenomenal. Not that I want this to end soon, I'm just curious, about how many chapters do you think this will end up being? I'm just curious to see how many more times I'm going to have to go through the "ooh yay! new chapter! reading...reading...done...WHERE'S THE NEXT ONE!?!?!?"

Haha great job!

Author's Response: i again! Thanks for the review!

To answer your question (and I've told someone else this so it's not a spoiler), AT THE MOMENT the story is 58 chapters + an epilogue. However, I am continuously adding and deleting scenes and moving them around, as well as moving chapter breaks, so that number may change. If you think of it as about 60 chapters all told, though, you'll be about right, give or take a couple. (Yes, I know. I went a tiny bit overboard. This is one of my failings I think!)

Anyway I'm very pleased you liked this chapter. *beams* I am planning on loading up the next one later on today, all things going well, so hopefully you'll enjoy that one too.

cheers, Mel

 Report Review

Review #17, by 4rm_h8_2_luv 

27th January 2010:
YAY!!! i would have been quite displeased if they broke up after getting back together only two chapters prior, lol. great chapter as usual. Sirius is just so freaking endearing, and this chapter really just shows us that in abundance!!! Will we be seeing more of the dueling lessons? I hope Bernie finds someone (i know that's off topic)

Author's Response: Hi again!

Yes, it would have been a bit much to have broken them up again so quickly, but poor Laura was rather upset when she thought that the whole trust thing, which she'd been working so hard on, wasn't reciprocated. I'm sure you can see how that might be an issue. :)

Hmm, more duelling lessons. I know they're referred to again but to be honest I'm not sure if there's another scene or not. I might have to read ahead and check that one. Sorry!

And yeah, Bernie. I've been a bit harsh on him, haven't I. He doesn't deserve that kind of treatment. But I've had a few similar requests and I think you'll be happy with where that goes (eventually, as always).

cheers, Mel

 Report Review

Review #18, by Erratic Amethyst 

26th January 2010:
Update!! Please. I am asbolutely engrossed in this story. ^_^

Author's Response: Hi there! Thanks for the review!

You will be pleased to know that generally I update every 5-7 days. This week, I'll probably load the next chapter on Thursday or Friday (GMT) so it won't be long now. Now, all I have to do is hope you enjoy it! *grins nervously*

cheers, Mel

 Report Review

Review #19, by Greta 

25th January 2010:
Yay!!! I love new chapters. In your author's note you say, "i had no intention of putting you through another whole break-up so quickly." Does that mean there will be another break-up ever? I don't think I can handle it. They are the perfect couple.

Author's Response: Hi Greta! Thanks for the review!

You know, you're the second person who's asked me about that comment, and like I told them I had no intention of it being interpreted that way. I won't say whether another breakup is on the cards or not (that would be a spoiler), but that it wasn't my intent that people would read that into it.

Anyway I'm so pleased that you like my story. *beams* Next chapter is due to be uploaded on Thursday or Friday.

cheers, Mel

 Report Review

Review #20, by fishkertoodles 

24th January 2010:
I believe I owe you two reviews. Let's put them in one, shall we?

I wrote an insanely long review for this chapter, but my computer had some difficulties and lost it, so I'm rewriting it now (:

The last chapter was very entertaining, especially with Laura and how she plays with the minds of the fan club. I hope she hexes Elvira into oblivion.

I like how they all talk to each other, and know what's going on in each other's lives, and how James makes fun of Sirius for chickening out. Martha was really helping Laura's confidence with that talk too. It's just too bad they had that little conflict over the Remus secret thing.

I feel really sympathetic for Bernie. He's on an emotional rollercoaster going after Laura. He really does deserve a nice girl. But I don't want him to take Laura either, since I want Laura/Sirius.

Regulus seemed like a great little brother, if you leave out the whole Death Eater stuff and all. It's sad that Regulus turns over so late and what happened, it could've saved Sirius quite some grief if he had just listened. But I like how you've kept the relationship between Regulus and Sirius more brotherly, whereas in most other stories I've read poses them as enemies from the start. It's touching how Regulus kept defending Sirius even though Sirius was an enemy house and disowned. Too bad Regulus had to disown him too ):

Oh Sirius and James, such oblivious boys. They need to learn to come out straight and tell the truth. Keeping secrets will just cause more trouble. Being such smart students, they should be able understand even a smidge about the ladies. Though I do wish Laura could be more understanding, or else their relationship is going to have many more fights. She's drawing conclusions. I can understand where she's coming from though, since Sirius doesn't really have a history of being a one-woman forever sort of guy. Still, her insecurities may be the relationship's demise.

On to this chapter!

I'm so glad Lily was able to iron out any problems with Laura's insecurities. She's such a great friend. I would kill to have a friend like her. Boy's Night Out isn't the best excuse in the book though. Lily is helping Laura with her confidence, too, especially with the part about comparing how much Laura knew how early with how much Lily knew how early. That didn't quite make much sense, did it?

I'm also very pleased that Laura and Mary had a chance to talk to each other and Mary could understand Laura's situation when she has to go without Sirius. I like reading their talks, it really brings out what they're thinking. Mary's accent is also lovely - I love reading it and sometimes I read it out loud just to hear it. I've always loved Scottish accents.

Poor James, Mr. Potter's death must have hit him really hard. Same with Sirius. They're such close brothers, and if there was one thing I could change about Harry Potter I would let James and Lily survive. But then there'd be no story, eh? Anyways, I appreciate that you didn't create an entire depressed section about Mr. Potter's death. I hate reading long droning depressing stories that make a bigger deal about something than it really is. Not that Mr. Potter's death isn't a big deal, it is, but I hate when authors overdo it.

Duelling lessons sound like fun! I want to start too :P but unfortunately, I'm a muggle ): James and Sirius seem like such great teachers. I bet they'll have Lily and Laura whipped up to shape in no time at all. Though I can't help but wonder whether or not Laura and Lily will be needing these skills later in the story?

Overall, terrific chapters. I love them, per usual, and can't wait for the next one, which, hopefully, I will be able to get back on track and read and review properly!


Author's Response: HI Fishy! What a lovely review!

Right. Last chapter ... I'm very pleased you enjoyed Laura's interactions with Elvira and co - she enjoyed that one too. There's a certain feeling of triumph involved, I think. :D

Yes, poor Bernie. He doesn't deserve to be mixed up in all this, he's a nice guy. He just chose the wrong girl to fancy. I might have to find him a nice girl to settle down with. :)

Very pleased you liked the Regulus interaction. From Sirius' dialogue in OotP I never thought they hated each other, otherwise why would Sirius do some digging to find out what happened to Regulus? So this was how I interpreted that would be.

As for boys, well yes, I agree with Lily in that you'd think really smart people like those two would have worked out it was a dumb way of going about things. Boys night out,while a bit flimsy, would at least have been a better excuse than the one they gave, and Laura would probably have accepted it if he'd just said that in the first place. And don't worry,you made perfect sense.

As for Mr Potter, well I admit that would have been more drawn out if Laura had gone to the funeral. However, she barely knew the man so her connection with it was more sympathy with those who were close to him.

Duelling lessons having a role later on? Not telling! Though Lily WAS in the Order so they would have helped there. :)

thanks again, Mel

 Report Review

Review #21, by lilylollies 

24th January 2010:
This is short cause Im not meant to be on the net, but had to sneak on to read. THANK GOD THEY DIDNT BREAK UP!
Thankyou! Keep writing

Author's Response: Hi again!

No, they didn't break up. I think I would have been very unpopular if they had. *grins* No, it's time for them to have a little bit of happiness .. until I throw another spanner in the works. Not telling when (or if) that will be, though!

cheers, Mel

 Report Review

Review #22, by lilylvr 

24th January 2010:
AMAZING thank god they didnt break up. i would of died. gosh i sure hope lauras dad doesnt get *gulps* mudered.ANYWAYS 10/10 as usual and update real soon! :D

Author's Response: Hi again! Thanks for the review! :D

Yes, I think I would have been VERY unpopular if I'd broken them up again, especially so soon after the last one. No one needs that much angst all at once, do they?

As for Laura's dad, well she hopes that too. I won't say any more than that, though. *evil grin*

Next chapter will be up on Friday at the latest.

cheers, Mel

 Report Review

Review #23, by Ronsgirl29 

24th January 2010:
all those rumors were halarious, especially the ones about sirius's piercings and tatoos (:

I liked this chapter alot, it had humor as well as serious stuff (no pun intended haha). a very nice balance!

and i was glad laura decided to trust sirius, he obviously want to tell her but its not his secret to tell.

can't wait till the next chapter! 10/10

Author's Response: Hi again!

So pleased you liked the rumours! I thought it was important to get a bit of humour in what was otherwise a bit of a sad situation, so that was why they were thrown in there. Good to see I hit the mark. *grins*

And yes, she decided to trust him. She trusted him already, she was just upset that it looked like he didn't trust her. Like she said, it was like a kick in the guts. But Lily helped her get over that so she's back to working on her own trust issues again. :)

I update about weekly so next chapter will be up on Friday at the latest.

cheers, Mel

 Report Review

Review #24, by SpottedZebra 

24th January 2010:
hello again! i'm back into the roll of life and caught up with the story. trust is a tricky obstacle, no? lots of drama, but it didn't seemed rushed like many stories are. the internal arguments and doubts were well done.

can't wait until the next chapter!

Author's Response: Hi again! Thanks for reviewing! :D

Yes, trust is a tricky obstacle, especially when Laura's already been the victim of trusting someone too much. But she is working on it, bless her.

I'm very pleased that you didn't think that it was overdone or rushed because I was a little unsure about ch44 and the argument at the end there, but it all worked out in the end so I guess that covers everything.

cheers, Mel

 Report Review

Review #25, by Singer Of All Songs 

23rd January 2010:
Hey! this was great sorry i took me so long to review i acctuly finished it the seccond day it was posted, however my ADD brain got distracted and i completely forgot! Anyway i can't wait for your next update!!!


Author's Response: Hi Singer! Thanks for reviewing again!

Ah, no worries about taking a while to review, like I've said before you doing it at all is a favour to me as far as I'm concerned.

In any case, it sounds like you liked it so I'm pleased with that. Next one is due at the end of the week - not sure when but Friday at the latest. I have a bit of a busy week so it's dependent on time.

cheers, Mel

 Report Review
If this is your story and you wish to respond to reviews, please login
Add a Review
<Previous Page  Jump:     Next Page>