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72 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Tris  

3rd October 2014:
Just reaps g this and thinking who they really should have had more time together. If yet had not both been so stubborn they could have been together for longer before they both died :( so sad to think about.

Author's Response: Yes, I know, they really didn't have enough time, did they? But you can blame JKR for that - oh, and my very strict story plan that stopped them getting together any earlier than they did. Sorry about that. :)

cheers Mel


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Review #2, by nott theodore 

7th July 2014:
Aw, more Sirius and Laura conversations, even if the other Marauders were present and she felt like she was making a fool of herself. Her knowledge of Quidditch and brooms was certainly very impressive and I'm not surprised that James was so impressed - regardless of how Sirius feels about her - with her knowledge and wanted her to be a part of the team, or work as their adviser. The news about the fact that she's not allowed to do any extra curricular activities - and that includes boyfriends - is quite unfair! It's probably scuppered Sirius's plans for the year as well :P

I loved the fact that James and Lily have finally got together! It felt realistic for them to get together at this stage and I'm glad you want them to have as much time together as possible because their end is so sad! But I loved the way Lily took the initiative in the end and just got them together, I felt so happy for them and it's a mark of the strength of their friendship that everyone else is as well!

Sian :)
Gryffindor House Cup 2014 Review

Author's Response: It's really funny when she talks too much and feels liek she's making a fool of herself, because he absolutely loves it. Though he was surprised too at the rule about no extra-curricular acttivities - and it's another spanner in the works, because now he wouldn't be sure, if he did ask and she said no, whether it's because she doesn't like him or because of the rule! Yes I'm so cruel, aren't I?

cheers Mel


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Review #3, by HP 

7th February 2014:
The scene in the Great hall for breakfast with Laura, Mary, and the boys is pretty much my favorite scene in the whole story. I love how before it was so weird for Mary and Laura to talk to the marauders. Before they would sit by eavesdropping and now they are in the conversation without need of the other girls as a buffer. Those are wonderful moments when they happen over time in real life and I'm so glad this story is realistic like that.

Author's Response: It's a good scene, isn't it? I'm rather pleased with that one too. Have you read the equivalent scene over in The process of becoming tamed? It throws a whole new light on it as well. Thanks for the feedback!
cheers Mel


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Review #4, by Olga 

2nd January 2013:
Aaaah James and Lily james and lily james and lily james and lily james and lily!!!

Author's Response: I take it you liked that bit? I did too, to be honest. It felt right for them, if you know what I mean.

cheers, Mel


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Review #5, by PoppyLuna 

18th October 2012:
it's the funniest chapter ever i swear

Author's Response: Another chapter I'm quite fond of - so pleased you liked it. :D

cheers, Mel


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Review #6, by jillkathryn 

28th June 2012:
Right, I told myself it was pointless leaving reviews on each chapter individually and I decided just to review the entire story once I had reached the end, but, wow! This was definitely my favourite chapter so far! I've loved everything about this story so far, the characters are amazing and your writing is excellent, I can't believe English isn't your first language! I giggled all the way through this chapter and almost jumped out of my seat with happiness when James and Lily got together. Now all that I'm waiting for is Sirius and Laura to realise that they like each other.

I'm absolutely loving this story and I'm so glad you've actually finished writing it because I'm not sure how I would cope with having to wait for you to release a new chapter! Well done! x

Author's Response: Thank you! I'm so pleased you are enjoying my story so much. Though I must say that I never said that English isn't my first language, only that I'm not from England. It was more a cultural thing than anything else - I wanted people who were English to let me know whether I made any horrible mistakes in that regard. :) Anyway, I totally understand about not wanting to wait for chapters ... I understand that a number of people were increasingly impatient for uploads when I was posting this. :D

cheers, Mel


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Review #7, by NightStar 

27th March 2012:
so deliciously cheesy!;)
I loved it:):)

Author's Response: Ah, it is cheesy, isn't it? But sweet all the same. I like this chapter, I have to admit. :D

cheers, Mel


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Review #8, by Lillylover22 

2nd March 2012:
Yay james and lily are going out 9/10 : )

Author's Response: Yep. It had to happen, didn't it?
cheers, Mel


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Review #9, by classicblack 

22nd October 2011:
Absolutely adorable ") I smiled too. It's really nice to see them finally get together and that Lily made the first move. Hoping to see Laura and Sirius follow suit soon :) And speaking of that, was it just me or did Sirius give Laura about a thousand hints during the discussion at breakfast that he fancied her?
Until next chapter,
classicblack

Author's Response: Hahaha. Sirius actually thought he was being subtle, but then again with James as his role model he has a bit of a warped idea as to what subtle actually means in these situations. But yeah, a few clues, which she steadfastly refused to recognise. Just to annoy people, of course. *evil grin*

cheers, Mel


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Review #10, by In The Shadows I Dwell 

9th August 2011:
YAY! James and Lily are finally together, and I would say, it's about time, but it was most definitely the right time and in the right fashion too might I add. I'm not usually an overly big fan of Lily/James, I'm usually a Snape/Lily fan, but something about the way you've written them has for the course of this story allowed me to be shipping them almost as much as I'm shipping Laura/Sirius, and at this stage it's seeming like more and more like it's going to happen! So I'm most definitely excited as a reader.

I love the insight into Quidditch you've provided, and not to mention Wales, sadly I'm poor at my general geography so I didn't really have much idea where she was describing, but it seemed as though James didn't either, so in the end it wasn't too disheartening. I may have even learnt something... I also love the detail you've put into taking apart a broomstick and putting it all back together again, the thought never actually crossed my mind what they'd do with the broom in order to get it to Hogwarts, in my mind I think I thought they carried it or something odd like that, this seems to make much more sense!

Yet another great chapter!

- Ash (InTheShadowsIDwell)
(Gryffindor)

Author's Response: Ah, you need to brush up on your Welsh geography,by the sounds of things. Don't worry, all you need is a decent atlas, which I can vouch for because I've never been to Wales (or Bristol, for that matter) and that was what I used. I figured that English people would be pretty vague about Wales and Scotland, though, and from the feedback I've had from the UK it looks like my guess was right. :D

And yeah, James and Lily finally got together. I wanted to give them a nice long time and, given the canon fact that they got together in seventh year, I thought I'd make it early in seventh year, just cos I'm nice. (See! I am nice! Just not to some of my other characters, that's all.)

cheers, Mel


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Review #11, by alicia and anne 

6th August 2011:
I think the other marauders all know that Sirius likes Laura hehe.
I do love how James and Lily got together finally! I was so happy I had a massive grin on my face! Love it! I can't wait to read more about Lily and James and Laura and Sirius. So much love! Hehe I love it! And the way that you write everyone is just amazing, it's like they're growing and changing right in front of your eyes.

alicia and anne
SLytherin

Author's Response: Oh yes, they definitely know. And are doing their best to rile him up about it, of course! :D

And yeah, Lily and James. I thought that was kinda sweet myself, and it fit how I'd written them that it would happen that way.

cheers, Mel


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Review #12, by LivingLife42 

23rd July 2011:
When I read Harry Potter I get all nervous and excited when I'm reading and that's exactly what happened when I read this chapter. I thought you wrote the Lily and James part really well and I was so happy for them.

Laura and Sirius are so cute! I love how you describe Laura's feelings around Sirius (I'm even getting a little crush on him :P). I loved the Quidditch scene. It was really well written.

I LOVE this story! I'm happy I'm reading it when it's all done cause I don't think I would have been able to wait for another chapter. You're an amazing author! :)

Author's Response: Hi! Thanks for the review!

I'm so pleased that you're enjoying this story, and that you liked how I got Lily and James together. It fit how I saw their characters and, as I said in the author note, I wanted to give them as long as I could considering their future.

As for Laura and Sirius, well let's just say that I enjoyed torturing them, which is kind of mean of me but the story just wouldn't have been the same without it. I'm really pleased that you like my characterisations and how I develop that relationship, because that's a huge compliment to my writing - and, let's face it, if you didn't like that you wouldn't keep reading, would you? :)

thanks again, Mel


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Review #13, by girly1393 

6th June 2011:
Hoorah for Lily!

Bravo to you.

Author's Response: Yes, hoorah for Lily. I thought it was appropriate for her to make the first move in this case, and it's not like James would have been complaining. Glad you liked it!

cheers, Mel


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Review #14, by theelderwand 

22nd August 2010:
YEA! 'Bout time!!! That's excellent. And, you're right, absolutely had to be her that made the first move here. I loved how you had her describe it too.

The whole scene where Laura is talking about Quidditch with the boys was just great. The reactions the Marauders had when she said she wasn't allowed to date was just priceless, sad, but priceless.

Now, if only Laura would take Sirius to that abandoned classroom down the hall...

Eldy

Author's Response: Laura take Sirius to that classroom? Sorry, been done before. I like to be a LITTLE more creative than that, hahaha.

I'm very pleased that you agree that it had to be Lily making the first move here - the way I've developed them it wouldn't really have worked any other way. She of course has the luxury of knowing that he's not going to push her away (which my main pair don't have, because they're bloody blind) which made it easier for her to do, but it was still a big step.

I'm quite fond of that quidditch conversation at breakfast too. Just had to throw another spanner in the works, because I can't make things too easy, can I? So now poor Sirius is terrified even more of rejection because if she says no, he won't know if it's because she's being a good girl and following Daddy's rules, or because she doesn't like him. Yeah, I know, I'm cruel. *evil grin*

cheers, Mel


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Review #15, by Capella Black 

14th August 2010:
"We could have had all summer" - I'm being a big girl about this, but that line almost made me cry, because of course, they really don't get enough time, and so it is a shame how long it took them to work it out. Still, so happy that it happened, and love the idea that Lily eventually just jumped him - seems very in character, and yet also unique. So, par for the course with this story.

Shame Laura isn't willing to give Quidditch a try, but then again, part of her charm is that she isn't miss perfect, so having her suddenly become a Quidditch star might not be the best tactic. Still, the rule about no dating in seventh year - inspired! Did not see that one coming, and again, it just makes her perfect for Sirius - she's now the one girl he can't have!

Really annoyed now - I needed to go to bed an hour ago, and yet...

Author's Response: Now, the reason Laura doesn't want to give Quidditch a try is that she knows she'd be terrible at it. That balance thing where she needs both hands on the broom at all times isn't a joke, so her point about catching a Quaffle or holding a Beater's bat is a good one. But yes, to make her a Quidditch star would have gone against how the rest of the story has been structured. The thing about her is that she slips beneath everyone's consciousness, which is why the Sirius thing is such a shock to everyone when it finally comes out.

Glad you liked the Lily/James bit, too. I thought it was fitting that she was the one who made the first move, hahaha.

cheers, Mel


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Review #16, by doglover 

11th August 2010:
YES!!! FINALLY!!! :DDD

Author's Response: Hi again!

I take it you're pleased that Lily got her guts up? A lot of people seemed to like this chapter, and I'm rather proud of how it turned out myself. Glad you liked it!

cheers, Mel


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Review #17, by ericajen 

28th July 2010:
Yay! Lily and James are finally together! I always love it in stories when they finally wind up together. Even though I always know it's coming, it's just as fun. You're killing me with this Sirius and Laura business though. I just want them to jump each other or something.

Author's Response: Yes, as a hopeless romantic I too love it when Lily and James get together, and I wanted to give them as long as possible so this was how I did that. As for Sirius and Laura ... well, let's just say that you're not the only one who was reacting like this at this point. It was quite deliberate on my part. Yep, I'm mean.

cheers, Mel


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Review #18, by Schnatz 

16th June 2010:
I can't help myself when I've read the chapter title 'It's all about James' and have to continue reading - studying can wait when there's the chapter Lily and James finally getting together! Oh and I have to smile all along! That was so cute! Loved it! :)

And I think I'm now in the best mood to study medieval studies a la Walther von der Vogelweide's minnesongs ;D

Schnatz who is still grinning like a Cheshire cat :)

Author's Response: Hi again!

Yes, this was rather a popular chapter when I first loaded it up. People seem to like the idea of James and Lily getting together for some reason. :D Glad you enjoyed it!

cheers, Mel


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Review #19, by filledwithwonder 

2nd May 2010:
"'She dodges darn well, too,' Mary put in, helping herself to more kippers. 'Ye shoul' see her i' a snowball ficht.'"
FORESHADOWING! I LOVE IT!

Author's Response: Hi again! thanks for the review!

Ah, you picked up on that? Well done. I did love throwing little instances of foreshadowing throughout this story and that was certainly one of them. Kinda cute, don't you think?

cheers, Mel


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Review #20, by always_dreaming 

25th March 2010:
did we ever find out laura's term grades? or does it only matter when it's OWL and NEWTs? also are we ever going to find out how the boys got into the girls' dorm? just some random questions that popped into my head. i'm glad james and lily are finally together! congrats to them

Author's Response: Hi again!

Ah, the grades. To be honest I didn't even think of those! Laura passed with good enough grades to continue her subjects into seventh year. We don't get the rundown on them because, unlike OWLs, it's not such a big deal. As for how the boys got into the girls' dorm, well that's revealed later. I think you've read that far now so I don't need to say anything else.

Aside from all that, I'm glad that you like James & Lily getting together. I thought it was about time.

cheers, Mel


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Review #21, by ochalke5 

10th January 2010:
FINALLY!!! I'm so glad they are together, now all we need is Laura and Sirius! Great chapter!! I love your story!!
10/10
Amazing story, Mel!
Natalie

Author's Response: Hi Natalie! Thanks for the review!

Wow, I'm a bit behind with my review responses for you, aren't I? It's because I loaded up a new chapter on Sunday so I've had a bit of an avalanche of reviews for that one, so my apologies for getting behind. I shall do my best to respond as quickly as you are reading though!

Yes, Lily and James finally got together. I quite liked this chapter; in this story of course Lily never hated James so she didn't have that hurdle to overcome, and it fit really nicely with the rest of the story. Glad you appreciated it! :D

cheers, Mel


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Review #22, by nextgenoration 

4th January 2010:
I squealed four times rather abruptly when the whole Lily and James thing happened! That made me very happy. :) Bout time, eh? ;]
It's funny though, when I first read chapter one of this story, I couldn't figure out what was up with Mary... I wasn't sure if she had a speech impediment or something! xD For the life of me, I couldn't understand her. But now, it's like I've learned her "language":) It's wonderful, like I it's a native language, hehe. The whole thing was superb, as always!

Thanks for writing such incredible chapters, melian, i can tell you work hard. (:

Author's Response: Hi again! Thanks for the review! :D

Yes, this chapter seems to have been a rather popular one, to be frank. People seem to like the idea of James and Lily getting together. (I liked it too, of course - otherwise why would I have written it that way?)

And, well, Mary. I tried to explain her accent in the first chapter with all that talk about her being a displaced Scot, but if you skimmed over that (or just aren't familiar with the Scottish accent) then I can understand how you might have been confused. I do offer a glossary of Mary's speech if people need it but usually it's a case of the more you read it, the more it makes sense to you, which seems to have worked in your case. *grins*

thanks again, Mel


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Review #23, by pinaygrl3123 

26th December 2009:
HAHAHA!! YESS!! I loved how that happened. And it was bound to happen sooner or later, but I love that she was the one who jumped him. Woo. That's so great. And soo about time. I think Laura should have tried out for the team, but what's done is done. Maybe something'll happen and she'll end up having to play, haha. That'd be a trip. And noo, that's soo sad that everyone is breaking up.. but as long as they're happy... but they were all so darn cute with their guys!

Author's Response: Hi again!

Yes, this was a rather popular chapter I think - lots of people seemed to like the idea of Lily and James getting together, particularly with Lily making the first move. But it fit their characters as I've written them so that was how it happened in this story.

As for Laura and Quidditch, well unfortunately she's right, she's no good on a broom if she has to hold a ball as well. So Quidditch just wasnt' going to happen.

cheers, Mel


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Review #24, by kat 

29th October 2009:
ola!!

james and lily! finally!!
*happy dance*
haha, that just made my day by the way. the chapter, not the 'happy dance'..which is painful to behold.
anyway, cant wait for the next one!!
oh, and please bring back the Quivering Wreck count!

xoxo

Author's Response: Hi kat! Thanks for another lovely review!

A lot of people seem to have liked the way I got Lily and James together. I recognise that it's not all that common in the world of fanfic but it did fit their characters as I had written them so that was how it worked. Glad you liked it! :D (And for the record I don't think any happy dance can be painful to behold - if it's because you're happy then it can only be good.)

And you will be pleased to know that the Quivering Wreck count is certainly going to be making a comeback. It may even be in the next chapter, but I'm not saying for sure because I can't really remember when it pops up and when it doesn't. But yes, it's definitely coming back.

cheers, Mel


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Review #25, by carabella 

29th October 2009:
Evening Mel :)

I read this one a few days past, but hadn't had the chance to praise you appropriately yet..

One thing I really noticed, and enjoyed, in this chapter, is how much your characters are growing and changing like real teenagers would.

It seems not very long ago at all that Laura and Mary rarely talked to any of the others Gryffindors, never really feeling up to par with them. When they did interact, it was often polite and friendly enough, but nothing special. Now, not only have they truly bonded with Lily, Martha and Charlotte, they can each hold their own in lively conversations, debates, and teasing with the formidable Marauders. Never could I have imagined Laura telling James Potter that he's one to talk ("Head Boy - and Quidditch captain, I might add - who's pining after the Head Girl. And you have a problem with me dating an authority figure?") or having the guts to quip witty innuendos in front of Sirius and the rest ("If I had to guess, I'd say they were giving their tongues a good workout without saying a word.")

But thankfully, you makes these changes beleivable. Laura, though growing more confident and coming into her own, is still plagued with internal worry and self-doubt, and has never stopped doubting herself. James, becoming more considerate and learning that in order to get Lily he should back off a bit, still has the same ego and unfailing obsession. But his better qualities (loyalty, for example) are more apparent, especially in his new connections with the girls.

I could go on about every character's growth, but you know all this.

My long-winded point is: you are amazing (haha). You are making this transition from mid to late teens with convincing and understandable character develpment, and integrating it into your plot fabulously.

I also liked the breakfast scene (the exchanges, the dramatic reactions to the no-boyfriend rules, the stumbles by Sirius and saves by James, the ever present obliviousness of Laura) AND Lily and James (really loved your take, how he calmed down and she got so frustrated and made the first move).

I meant to leave a quick note of appreciation, and rambled once again. Sorry I think you're sooo brilliant :D

Patiently looking forward to the next chapter,
xx Caro

Author's Response: Hi Caro! Another brilliant review, thank you!

actually I think I'm going to have to stop reading your reviews because you're making my head swell. I will have to do something like let my kids throw mud at me today to get my ego back down to size I think! But thank you so much, I loved reading this :D

It's actually a bit of a challenge making your characters age and mature at a believable rate, but like you noticed my main cast are 15 at the start of the story and 18 at the end of it, so there has to be a good bit of maturing in that time because it's when teenagers start thinking and behaving more like adults. I won't say they are quite like adults, because at that age there's still the "six foot tall and bulletproof" thing that they tend to have, but it's more like. And by the sounds of things you think I'm pulling that off so that's very gratifying to know. Because the truth is that it's more than half my life ago that I was that age myself so my memory of what it was actually like is probably a bit hazy. But I see this as more of a coming-of-age story than anything else so you really need to show that maturing accurately if you're going to pull that off. :)

But yes, Laura is certainly much more comfortable in everyone else's presence now, to be able to pay them out and play with them like that. Even Sirius, though she doesn't think this is the case. In fact if she ever bothered to try to assess it from an outsider's point of view she might even recognise that, contrary to two years ago, she and Mary are actually part of the "cool kids" now. By association, yes, I admit that, but they are. Anyone who James Potter treats as an equal like that has to be. And yes, James has grown up enough to work out that pestering someone isnt' the best way to seduce them. He's still James and he's still got the arrogant streak, but that tempers with age and I'm glad that I've shown that in a believable way.

So yes, thank you so much for this lovely review! And don't feel bad about rambling because I love long reviews. :D

cheers, Mel


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