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61 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Emily1990 

19th September 2014:
Isn't Filch's cat called Mrs Noris not Mrs Clay??
All in all the story is good :)

Author's Response: Hi! Filch's cat is called Mrs Norris in the HP series. However, this is set 20 years earlier so it's a different cat. As JKR has said she got Mrs Norris' name from a Jane Austen story, I chose the name Mrs Clay from a different Jane Austen story.

cheers, Mel


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Review #2, by nott theodore 

7th July 2014:
You know, until reading your author's note for this chapter I'd completely forgotten that James and Sirius had got into trouble for cursing Bertram Aubrey so it's amazing that you took that tiny detail and worked it into the story like this. I felt so, so proud of Laura and the way that she dealt with finding out about Bertram cheating on her. She was so mature and together about the whole thing and even though she'll shed lots more tears over it, she can be proud she didn't show how much it got to her.

I feel like Sirius probably told her for slightly the wrong reasons, but it's good that the other boys were there to measure his response as well. And the conversation between the two of them afterwards was really cute! ♥ I just wanted to give Sirius a hug for doing so much to distract Laura and look after her when she'd found out something so horrible. It must have been hard for him since he likes her so much but it was really sweet to take care of her and he clearly trusts her to tell her about the cloak and show her the map as well. I'm so glad Laura's got all the girls to rally around her and look after her too now!

Sian :)
Gryffindor House Cup 2014 Review

Author's Response: You know, there were a number of people who had forgotten that part of the canon, but as there is so little canon for the Marauder era I had to put in every bit I could think of. And I needed a cheating boyfriend for the story, so why not combine them, right? :)

And yeah, Sirius wasn't entirely altruistic there, but then again what teenaged boy is? Especially in that sort of situation. And yeah, he told her about the Cloak and showed her the Map, both of which hadn't been cleared first, but he kind of made the decision on the spot. But yes, he trusts her. Why wouldn't he, really?

cheers, Mel


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Review #3, by Olga 

31st December 2012:
Fabulous and adorable! Well done!

Author's Response: Thank you! So pleased you liked it.

cheers, Mel


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Review #4, by Maurader_Girl007 

5th November 2012:
I know why this was named most addictive story... I CANNOT STOP READING!!! It's like a mental illness :P Thank you! Amazing story!! :) x

Author's Response: thank you very much! So pleased you're enjoying it.

cheers, Mel


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Review #5, by Voldemorts_Little_Helper 

27th March 2012:
Remind me to find some marauders next time my heart gets broken...

Author's Response: They're good guys, aren't they? I wouldn't mind them for myself, either, to be frank.

cheers, Mel


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Review #6, by Lillylover22 

2nd March 2012:
Stupid bertram. 9/10 : )

Author's Response: Lol. A lot of other people didn't like him either.

cheers, Mel


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Review #7, by Sophie 

29th December 2011:
I am loving your story at the moment! i am really getting into it ! i love sirius! as i mentioned earlier i found it interesting to have the story from the perspective of a character who isnt popular and the main person (ie lily) so thats what makes it such an interesting read! great job?? by the way are you a girl or a boy! haahhaha i cant tell?

Author's Response: Hi again! First up, to answer your question, I'm definitely a girl. As for having an OC as the main character, well that's not so unusual but perhaps it's less common in Marauder stories. Anyway, I'm so pleased you still like it. :)

cheers, Mel


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Review #8, by singer123 

13th December 2011:
Lily should plan a revenge on Bertram.. That would be exciting!
Laura finally realizing that she and Sirius can be a pair keeping aside that "cool" "uncool" nonsense?

Author's Response: Ooh, Lily planning revenge on Bertram? Maybe i should have done that. But the boys did a reasonable job, I think.

As for Laura, well she's still uncool. At least, she thinks so. :)

cheers, Mel


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Review #9, by classicblack 

19th October 2011:
OH MY GOODNESS! Sirius-Laura bonding time!! And now she knows about the Map and the Cloak! And Betram is gone for good! This is like a triple bonus of awesomeness! I can't tell you how much I LOVED this chapter. It was brilliant :)
And oh, now I realize, Betram WAS actually mentioned in the HP series, but just while Harry was doing detention for Snape for doing Sectumsempra on Mafloy. Very accurate; I'm truly amazed at your attention for detail. Nice job!
Until next chapter,
classicblack

Author's Response: Yes, there was some serious bonding in this chapter, and she learned some important things in the process. So yeah, three for the price of one, so to speak. :)

And good pickup! Not a lot of people recognised Bertram's name as I was writing this and several still didn't after this chapter, so your memory is very good. (And the context that he came up in - I'm most impressed!)

cheers, Mel


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Review #10, by In The Shadows I Dwell 

7th August 2011:
Did Sirius just refrain from making some sort of comment about Bertram? I think he might have... Goodness I have expected him to have a great line prepared for this moment, something that only he or James would truly have been able to come up with. Then again, I suppose the situation really didn't need any commentary from Sirius or James for that matter, no I think the scene spoke for itself, and in a way, I've always found that difficult as a writer to capture so well done on creating such a vivid scene that I was actually able to perfectly imagine it in my mind!

And yes, I have to agree that it was certainly a very interesting introduction to the map and the cloak! And now I understand why the name Bertram Aubrey was so familiar, all this time I for some reason, assumed him to be an OC, when I first saw the name I couldn't help but wonder why it was so familiar... Now I know. Either way, he deserves what he got, and I think that James being Sirius' moderating factor is a nice touch, as I suppose they really had to reign each other in at times where necessary, they couldn't just run about the castle out of control all the time now could they?

Yet another brilliant chapter, and I really can't help but feel heartbroken for Laura, no matter how much her holding Sirius' hand makes me happy...

To the next chapter!

- Ash (InTheShadowsIDwell)
(Gryffindor)

Author's Response: Yes, he certainly did refrain. And while he might have had a line prepared (though then I'd have to have thought of what it was, hahaha), if he did he would have decided not to use it anyway. She was a bit fragile and wouldn't have taken it very well, I dont' think. :)

And don't worry, you're not the first person who didn't recognise the name Bertram Aubrey right away. I just had a list of things that had to be covered in this story, and the jinxing of Bertram was one of them. Add the plot point of the cheating boyfriend and the two melded together nicely, don't you think?

cheers, Mel


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Review #11, by theelderwand 

21st August 2010:
Great chapter.

I must say I loved that the "Scouring of Bertram" was carried out as a very smooth Marauder's Mission. Right down to the last detail. I especially liked how James and Sirius decided that, because Laura's needs had to come first, Sirius got the map and James had to take his chances.

Even better that Sirius confided in her about the map, too. I would hope, at this point, she'd start to figure out that Sirius fancies her. Gods, is she as dense as a bloke, or what?

Great writing, Mel. Totally sucked in here, if you haven't noticed.

Eldy

Author's Response: Yes, it was a very well-planned Marauder Mission, save the getting caught by Filch at the end of it. James allocated the roles with great care, hahaha.

As for Laura now knowing about the Map, well she just figured that she didn't give him much choice but to tell her - she's nowhere near thinking past that at this stage. In other words, yes she's as dense as a bloke .. or, more to the point, inexperienced enough not to recognise the signs, even if they are in flashing neon lights.

cheers, Mel


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Review #12, by Capella Black 

14th August 2010:
Huh? We knew they had done this to Bertram Aubrey? I really need to learn more Marauder canon, as I didn't see that coming at all. Still, a perfect explanation of why they would be compelled to blow up someone's head and leave them for Dumbledore. I definitely think he got off lightly, but then again it isn't too surprising, as Laura's not the type to encourage further retaliation. Overall, this fits perfectly both with canon and your OC. Lovely.

Sirius letting her know about the map and cloak huh? Well that is serious - as far as I can tell, she now knows more of their secrets than Martha, who Sirius actually dated. Hmmm, maybe my desperate vicarious hopes will come true. Another wonderful little glimpse into the mind of Mr Black.

Overall, this entire chapter fitted perfectly with how I'd expect Laura to react, and I'm still squealing over the final line - Id just spent the best part of an hour and a half holding hands with Sirius Black. YAY (who needs Bertram anyways?)!

Author's Response: In HBP, after Harry Sectumsempras Malfoy and has detention that makes him miss the last quidditch game of the year, he has to go through his father's old misdeeds and refile them or something, and this was one of the detentions he read about. As one of the very few pieces of Marauder canon that we did have I had to include it, didn't I?

And yes, she now knows about the cloak and the map, which as you surmised is more than Martha ever learned from him. According to the Marauder rules he was allowed to tell her, and he'd made an accurate assumption that she'd keep her mouth shut about them.

As for that last line - I just had to do it. It was too much fun to leave out. :D

cheers, Mel


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Review #13, by doglover 

11th August 2010:
aaawww she liiikes sirius!!! :)

Author's Response: Oh, I suspect that might be news to her right now. She's got a failed relationship to get over first, thank you very much. But yeah, she does, deep down. She just needs to work it out.

cheers, Mel


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Review #14, by HermioneTwin44 

8th July 2010:
I continue to be amazed by your ability to keep elements from the books in this. It's amazing!

Author's Response: Aw, thanks! I might have said this before but I figured that we had so little canon from that era that I might as well try to fit all of it in somewhere. Glad you appreciated it!

cheers, Mel


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Review #15, by Schnatz 

13th June 2010:
Hey Mel,

When I've read the title of this chapter, Bertram's end, my first reaction was a big smile. I'm sorry for that because what happened was actually a sad thing for Laura but I can't help it I'm just happy that Laura dropped him. I've always known that there was more reason than Sirius that I don't like Bertram. ;-)
But I'm sooo sorry for Laura and as so often I think that you did a great job with the description of her feelings. *thumbs up*

I also liked the part with Sirius a lot. That was a very personal and special moment they've shared - not only because of Laura's sorrow but also because of Sirius told her from the invisible cloak (oh, by the way, I can't tell you how much I love the word 'invisible cloak'. I think it's so much more beautiful than 'Tarnumhang') Anyway, I really liked this scene.

And I also liked the scene where the girls talk to Laura. She could be so happy that she has so wonderful friends like Mary, Lily, Martha and Charlotte. I think when you are heartbroken it's important that you have friends like them - friends who can make you laugh and hug and comfort you. Of course, it's always important to have true friends but in bad times it's even more important. Plus for Laura's girls! I really really like them a lot! :)

As always I'm looking forward to read the next chapters ... yay, soon I'll arrive at the 30th chapter ;-)

I hope you've had a nice weekend,
till then, Schnatz

Author's Response: Hi again!

Yes, quite a few people liked this chapter when it came out - something to do with seeing the end of Bertram and getting some more Sirius, I believe. *grins*

But yes, Laura is very lucky that she has some really good friends who are going to stick up for her, because at a time like this she needs that. As for Sirius, well I had a lot of fun writing that scene, which probably comes out in the text. :)

cheers, Mel


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Review #16, by always_dreaming 

25th March 2010:
awww i LOVE that ending! seriously... such a good ending. :)

i really liked this chapter. sorry, i got nothing else for you, just that i think this chapter is my favorite so far!

Author's Response: Hi again! So glad to see you read on! :D

Yeah, that was a good ending, wasn't it? I mean, even Laura's not THAT clueless not to notice, even if it did take a while to sink in. Very pleased you liked it though :)

cheers, Mel


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Review #17, by constance 

2nd March 2010:
nifty? who says nifty?

Author's Response: Hi there! Thanks for the review!

Ah, who says nifty? Not you, I'm guessing! It's actually not an uncommon word in my part of the world so I suspect this is just one of those instances where different countries use different words more often. People in the UK who have been reading this story haven't picked up on "nifty" yet as an incorrect word choice, though, so unless you are from the UK I think it will be staying for the time being.

Thanks for reading :D
Mel


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Review #18, by Ronsgirl29 

19th January 2010:
haha about the previous review, well i decided jerk was the nicest possible way to say it, and i wanted to refrain from using profanities. and another great chapter! i'm glad they punished him a bit, and when i read the last line about holding hands i smiled (: 10/10

Author's Response: Hi again!

Yes, fair enough, I can understand you not wanting to swear in a review. But yeah, he's not the world's most popular boy. I think that's a fair comment. :D

Glad you're still enjoying it - I was pretty pleased with this chapter myself.

cheers, Mel


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Review #19, by ochalke5 

7th January 2010:
Wow... just wow. I'm actually a little speechless, Mel. It was so well written and the boys are just so... that is how i pictured them... and the whole story seems like it could've been part of JK Rowlings theme... like you've hit all the people dead on. It was so good... i can't stree it enough how wonderful it was. Really, amazing work. You're writing is so good. I really liked it... I mean it... I'm in awe right now! Just amazing.
10/10
I loved it Mel, really truly loved it. You're an amazing writer and I'm glad you shared this story with us here on Harrypotterfanfiction
Natalie

Author's Response: Hi Natalie!

Wow, thank you! To think I've inspired this sort of reaction. I did do a lot of research with the canon characters, trying to get their mannerisms, figures of speech and movements right, but to have you saying this just makes my day. *beams*

thanks again, Mel


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Review #20, by pinaygrl3123 

26th December 2009:
Hate him. Had a feeling he'd cheat once Laura wasn't sleeping with him, the ass. So wrong. And she really shouldn't feel bad, I mean.. it's obvious she has really good friends, willing to watch out for things she wouldn't've known about otherwise.. well.. that goes for James and Remus and Peter.. but Sirius.. I'm sure he's starting to get a new agenda.. Which is absolutely cute. And that was cute to realize at the end of the chapter. Aw, I love them together... And I like how gradual it's all happened. Haha.

Author's Response: Hmmm ... yes, you're dead right in that Sirius has a new agenda. Has had for a couple of chapters now, actually. I've written some one-shots from his POV and some other POVs) around this story which I've been talked into posting once this fic is all up, so you'll find out when that happened eventually. And the other boys know about it which was why James organised the roles the way he did - it was very deliberate. But yeah, it is cute, isn't it? And I'm very pleased that you like how gradually it's happened because that was one thing that annoyed me about a lot of fanfic - going from barely knowing each other to being madly in love in about two weeks ... it just doesn't happen that way.

As for Bertram, well, yes, ass. Nice description. Like I said earlier, one track mind, and when he couldn't get it in one place he looked elsewhere. Not a very endearing character trait, I know, but it had to happen.

cheers, Mel


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Review #21, by Lyall 

31st October 2009:
I noticed the sutle connection btween the detention slips harry has to clean out in one of the books and he finds his dads and Sirius saying "Double detention for making a head swell twices its sizxe usin an illegal curse" Very good. I am loving this!!

Author's Response: Hi Lyall! Thanks for the review! :D

Yes, a few people recognised Bertram's name from book 6. I grabbed every bit of canon I could find from that era and tried to include it somehow, and this was how Bertram fit in. He filled a number of plot points for me. :)

Anyway I'm very glad that you're enjoying my story, and I hope that you keep on reading until you catch up. I'm updating about weekly these days.

thanks again, Mel


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Review #22, by MYHEART BELONGS TO WOOD 

14th October 2009:
That was awesome. Sirius was so concerned and sincere. I think he is getting a touch of what James has for Lily?!?! I have to say it again. i feel like this is how it is suppose to be. Meaning you stick to canon so well. Are you sure you havent posessed JK? Awesome chapter. FANTASTIC STORY!

Author's Response: I'm so pleased you liked this chapter. I was very pleased with Sirius in this one too ... and you're right with the James/Lily comparison, that's pretty much where he's at here.

And thanks for the compliment about canon! I think I've said this before but the idea was to have a story that fit around what canon we do have so it would just slip seamlessly into that world. And it sounds like you think I've managed that so that just makes my day. Thank you!! *beams*

(But no, I'm pretty sure I haven't possessed JKR. And she hasn't possessed me. But it's lovely that you're even asking.)

thanks again, Mel


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Review #23, by 4rm_h8_2_luv 

5th October 2009:
I LOVE THIS STORY! CONGRATS ON THE AWARD!!!

Author's Response: Thanks! I'm still a little amazed about the award but it's still there on my author page so it must be true. *grins*

thanks for the review!
Mel


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Review #24, by Victoire Weasley 

29th September 2009:
This story definitely deserved its Dobby Award; it is absolutely, incredibly addicting. I love it! And, you're a really great writer. I really, really can't wait for more!

Author's Response: Wow, thanks Victoire Weasley! What a flattering review! *beams*

I'm still amazed about the Dobby but it's still there so it must be true. And it keeps pushing readers my way which is fantastic ... and then I get reviews like this. Incredible. :D

Anyway thanks again and you will be pleased to know that the next chapter is in the queue and will hopefully be validated shortly.

cheers, Mel


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Review #25, by Fishkertoodles 

29th September 2009:
really, this is a great story! I think you're a great writer, and seriously, this story really deserved that dobby. Speaking of dobbies, I was trying to get through all of the 2009 winners, but I came upon this one and just stopped. It's amazing!!! I'm checking everyday for the next chapter, I hope it comes up soon! I wonder what will happen between laura and Sirius now... c: im sorry to say that I can't offer any criticism though, it's just so great! Update soon!!!

Smiles,
Fishy

Author's Response: Wow! Thank you so much! What an amazing review! *beams*

I'm eternally grateful to those who nominated and then voted for me in the Dobbys because it has pushed so many readers my way. And then to get reviews like this .. wow. I'm flabbergasted.

Anyway next chapter is in the queue so will hopefully be up soon, pending validation of course. And I really hope that you keep on enjoying my little tale as we get through sixth and seventh years.

thanks again, Mel


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