18 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Percy 

16th August 2014:
Percy has blue eyes not brown :) great story though

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Review #2, by magnolia_magic 

18th July 2013:
Percy makes his appearance! Poor Audrey; I really would not want to be in the unfortunate position of crossing him when he's on a work tirade. I love the line: "The only thing cheerful about him was his hair." What a perfect way to describe the Percy we know from the books.

And I love her new office! It seems like the kind of place I would love to work, though I can see why it takes some getting used to for Audrey. She's so diligent about her job, and I couldn't help but laugh at her reactions to her new boss and co-workers (though I felt terrible laughing at Audrey...she's too sweet for that!) Madeline, especially, makes me laugh; she's Audrey's exact opposite, and it'll be interesting to see how they get along. And that second run-in with Percy. They aren't off to a great start, are they? But it'll be so much fun to re-read and watch things unfold :) Awesome work!

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Review #3, by Dark Whisper 

4th February 2013:
Wow... it really is a very different department from her last. It is good that these people can laugh and have some fun.

I liked how you created the first meeting with Percy. You describe him really well.

You also describe a perfect "first-day-on-the-job horror story" with the papers flying everywhere. It's a good thing Percy already knows how to remedy the situation.

Great second chap,
Dark Whisper

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Review #4, by Owlpost68 

27th November 2011:
ooohh the first day of a new job, always a bit awkward. Oh well, it's bound to get better right? lol (though it mostly gets worse before it does with new jobs lol) Poor audrey has to deal with a grumpy percy... I hope she puts him in his place at least once :P

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Review #5, by Ellyn Rose 

23rd October 2011:
oh. i just understood. percy and audrey. of course! excellent.

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Review #6, by Pixileanin 

20th August 2010:
I'm so happy that Audrey is surrounded by such good-natured people in her office when she's so nervous in her new position. I love that you captured the first-day jitters so realistically. I can see that she needs a bit of time to adjust to new things and she has this subtle way of expressing herself. I can't wait to see if Audrey indeed is able to be more "assertive" later on.

Author's Response: As to your last statement - well, you and me both. XD She definitely won't do a total 180, but she is someone who comes out of her shell around people she feels comfortable with. Thanks for the review!


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Review #7, by Marzipan 

31st July 2010:
Okay, confession time: I adore Percy/Audrey. And I particularily adore your Percy and Audrey. Its a different take on the two of them than what I've grown used to: Audrey is very, very sweet - but my heavens, she is shy! She is not the brash, overbearing creature that I see so much of - but I like her better this way. I relate to your Audrey much more than I do to those other Audrey's, and I must say she seems much more Percy's type this way!

Speaking of Percy, he's a bit of a git, eh? I mean, we have always known that he is a git, but he still seems to have the same tough exterior that he built back when he was estranged from his family. Post-war, I'd expected him to have - mellowed - some. I would give him the benefit of the doubt and say that maybe it's just a bad day, but judging from Lionel and co's attitude towards him, it seems he hasn't at all. (Mellowed, that is, if you can't follow my convoluted thought process. Honestly wouldn't blame you if you can't.) Not that I think your Percy is incompatible with what we know from canon, just not what I expected him to be. But poor Audrey - it was just an accident, for heaven's sake! And he's just as much at fault, piling the reports up like that. *grumbles*

Erm, yes. What else? I adore Vivi. She seems absolutely lovely the little bit I've seen of her, and I want her to pop up quiet often. Wonderful three dimensional OC character you have there. The mini rose bush from last chapter was adorable, and I loved how you compared it to Audrey herself. And Darcy sounds like fun already - what kind of trouble is she going to end up causing? Onwards, I suppose, to find the answers. Cheers for now!


Author's Response: Hey! Thanks for the stellar review!

Percy/Audrey is a pretty fantastic ship. I am slightly incredibly disgustingly in love with Percy. Ron is my favorite, but Percy is a close second. So I really thought for awhile about what kind of girl he needed, and I can't imagine Audrey being any other way. I have also seen the characterizations of Audrey where she's really outgoing and brash and flippant - or worse, where she's a carbon copy of Percy - and I just can't see it. You can't have Percy with a girl who's just like him. I quite honestly think they would drive each other nuts. And I don't know if he would have the patience for some loud, obnoxious girl. The thing is, at his core, I think Percy is very insecure and worries quite a lot, and compensates by being what he is. So I think the perfect gal for him is someone very nurturing and supportive and unconditionally loving. I wouldn't call her submissive, but she is very gentle, and I think he would be very intrigued and humbled by someone so completely good and unassuming.

Yes, I'd say he's still a bit of a jerk sometimes. I do believe he changed after the war, but I never thought he would have done a total 180. I think he would be different, but still very much like himself. More appreciative of family and a bit more well-balanced, but old habits are hard to change, and ingrained personality traits are even harder to change. I think he'll always take himself a little too seriously, because that's just who he is by now. I find him a fascinating character, actually, because when you think about it, he is completely afflicted with Middle Child Syndrome. He overcompensated to avoid being lost in the crowd of kids. He has, as you'll see in future chapters, mellowed out as you expected him to - but he definitely has his moments where he really needs to be slapped. As far as everyone else's opinions of him, I think it's half their fault and half his own fault. He builds up this facade and these walls to put people off, but at the same time, I think it's equally their doing as well. I think in general, people are inclined to dislike other people who take themselves too seriously, even if it's not necessarily fair, because they don't take the time to look past it. So a lot of these characters just write him off, because they've got one way of looking at life, and he's got a different way, and that's that. It's not really fair of them, and to some extent I think it perpetuates Percy's bad attitude. Anyway, sorry for the novella-length psychological evaluation of Percy Weasley. XD I could go on for days, but I won't.

Oh, Vivi. I adore her, too. I think she's a nice balance for Audrey.

Thanks for the awesome review!


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Review #8, by FannyPrice 

10th July 2010:
Woohoo Arrows fans!

I know thats not much for a review, but really it was so good...whats there to say? Percy was impeccable, and their whole encounter incredibly awkward that i adored it. I felt really bad for Audrey.

Lovely story again!

Author's Response: Heehee. I have this image, based on what little I know of England, of Audrey's dad being from the north, so I made him an Appleby supporter because of the geography.

Thanks for the review!


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Review #9, by PenguinsWillReignSupreme 

7th November 2009:
Okay. I want Audrey as my sister and/or best friend. She's so LOVELY. I love her to bits. She's kind of an Everywoman character, I think: I can relate to her 100% in everything she does. She's so human.

Percy ♥
Lovely man, isn't he? I think you've got his character pretty much perfect, and the general attitude to him around the office too. I can't wait to see how he changes throughout the story as he and Audrey come to be closer.

I LOVE this whole department. Every member is different and memorable. I really like Lionel, I must say. There's something about him that makes me grin. He's lovely!

My knowledge of the sport was limited to the fact that my dad supported the Appleby Arrows, and that my sister and I were forbidden to marry anyone who supported the Wimbourne Wasps.
THIS is something that I 100% relate to. My dad has told me since I was old enough to understand that I could marry anyone on the planet except a Liverpool FC supporter! Love it.

I have nothing else to say, except a small comment on how wonderfully British this sounds! I meant to put it in the first review but it slipped my mind. It sounds like a Brit has written it. Some of the colloquialisms and slang are just perfect.

Okay, that is it now.
Brilliant chapter ^_^


Author's Response: I'm really happy to hear you can relate to Audrey. I was worried that she might just come off as a bland character - I wanted her to be pretty average, though I knew that might also make her boring, being nothing out of the ordinary.

Lovely man, indeed. Is it strange I love him so much despite him being a jerk sometimes?

Haha, Quidditch - I don't think Quidditch rivalries are emphasized nearly enough in fanfiction! I've heard the football rivalries are really heated, and it's the same way over here in America with baseball and football (the American kind). So why not Quidditch?

It was really wonderful to hear that you find this sufficiently British-sounding. I always wonder if my writing just sounds blatantly like an American-trying-to-write-like-a-Brit. :-P So now I feel very reassured!

Thanks, Rachelle!


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Review #10, by Anina 

21st September 2009:
I'm really impressed w/ this story. . . actually all of yours. You're prolly my fav author!

Author's Response: Wow, thank you! I'm very flattered. ^_^

I hope to have the next chapter of this fic posted in about a week, so check back soon!

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Review #11, by Laugharama_llama 

20th September 2009:
Haha!! I'm LOVING this story!! I can't wait to find out out Audrey and Percy get together, what with his bad attitude. It's nice to know that Percy is still Percy, hahaha. I can't WAIT for the next chapter. I really love how you're constructing this story, and your characters work very well with Audrey. Like how she goes from Moira to Dibble! Oror, how she has to deal with Madeline who is basically the opposite of Audrey! And I love that you made Audrey a kind of shy, smart, unsure of herself girl, since most people always make Audrey really stuck-up and kind of like Percy while he wasn't talking to the Weasleys.

Wonderful, wonderful!

Author's Response: Thanks for reviewing! I'm happy to hear you're enjoying it so far, especially Audrey's characterization. I love her to pieces. I definitely didn't see Percy marrying the mirror image of himself -- I think he needs a nice, grounded girl who will bring out the best in him.

Chapter 3 is currently being beta'd, and it will be posted soon!


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Review #12, by Violet Gryfindor 

14th September 2009:
Oh my gosh, this story is amazing! *squees*

Okay, now that that's out of my system (I've been waiting for most of the chapter to scream that out), I can try to write a rational sort of review, suitable for a story about the stiff, purposeful Percy. I'm not usually a fan of adjectives, yet the way you used them in relation to Percy was absolutely perfect - you describe his personality in a couple well-placed words, so that you don't even have to name him to make it obvious to the reader who he is. That was the first brilliant thing about this chapter.

The second was how well you were able to work romantic comedy cliches into the story without making them seem cliched. Her being new, getting lost, colliding with him in the hall, and then having an altogether bad experience with him - it's something that seems to happen in a lot of romantic comedies, yet I was engrossed by your writing. You made that cliched sequence of events very new and fresh, which made this a joy to read. My eyes were glued to the screen. :D

Audrey is adorable - she's so endearing and real. While I laughed at her awkwardness, I also understood it and felt sympathy for her. Is it bad to say that I act like her when I'm nervous and around unfamiliar people? Maybe that's what made it so funny. :P

I really loved this chapter and it was exciting to see that you'd updated so soon! I'm looking forward to seeing what will happen next. ^_^

Author's Response: I really can't get over the fact that YOU are telling me my story is amazing - since you're such an incredible writer yourself!

I admit to being a bit adjective-happy (and adverb-happy). But I'm glad they worked out here - I have a very specific vision of Percy, and it was challenging to put it into words, so it's relieving to know it was successful!

I think this chapter was a giant cliche-fest, for sure. I really had a lot of inner doubt about using them...and ultimately stuck with them because they just put Percy and Audrey in the right kind of relation to each other (which is, of course, why they're cliches...because they're so convenient for setting up relationships in this manner.) In the end, I just decided to suck it up and embrace the cliche. XD And I'm so glad it came off as non-cliched - I hoped Audrey's temperament and the overall tone of the story would help pull them out of normal cliche territory.

And your comment about how you act like her in unfamiliar situations, is exactly the kind of response I was hoping for! I'm like that, too, and I imagine many people are. That was why I felt comfortable using the cliches...because who hasn't had something like this happen to them? I have definitely run into people when wlaking through doorways (sometimes attractive, bespectacled men; sometimes not!) and I have also dropped papers all over the place (sadly, yes, I have...)

Thanks so much for the review, Susan! It means a lot to me. The next chapter is currently in the works!


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Review #13, by TheDirigiblePlum 

14th September 2009:
A new chapter! :D Woot!

But yet again your stories have distracted me from homework!!! :O I was meant to be looking up something to do with microscopes and the new chapter I spotted was too tempting to resist! Your writing is just so much more appealing to me than microscopes, and that's saying something because I'm a bit of a science nerd. :D

Moving swiftly on! This chapter was great, I love Audrey! You've managed to make her stand out so much as a character, and she's only been in two chapters! You could rival Shakespeare you know. ;) Just her manner and general way, she's very endearing to me. She's also very funny, but I don't think she realises she is... (If that makes sense at all. :D)

All the characters are very vivid and just interact so well together! It gives the story real chemistry and makes me feel like I'm standing there with them, like I'm in the story, which to me is very important. :) I think your characters are the parts I love most about your stories, because they're all so different and real, and they actually feel like real people, rather than fictional people. :)

Also your writing style is very lively and I have to admire how you write in the 1st person (Sorry if I've got this wrong! I usually get the persons muddled up :D) because whenever I do it, I always feel it turns out cheesy or something.

Also loved Percy. He's great! I always had a soft spot for Percy, because he did used to make me laugh. :D And he wears glasses.

Love from your fervent admirer...

TheDirigiblePlum or Marianne. Depending. :)

Author's Response: GO DO YOUR HOMEWORK!! Hahaha. ^_^

Microscopes are fun. I hope your science homework was enjoyable.

I could rival Shakespeare's embarrassing, long-lost sister who can't write worth a Knut. Hahaha. Maybe you have done TOO MUCH homework, because you are talking NONSENSE! Hahahaha.

But yay! - your reviews always make me so happy. I was especially pleased to hear your thoughts on Audrey. And YES, she is funny in her own way, I'm so glad it seemed that way to you! She has her own subtle sense of humor.

Writing in 1st person definitely holds that danger, of being too cheesy, so I'm happy to know I'm pulling it off well so far!

Percy is excellent. And I find men who wear glasses to be incredibly, ridiculously attractive, so he gets bonus points for that!

Thank you so much for the review! *hugs*


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Review #14, by Eridanus 

14th September 2009:
Melanie, I am incredibly jealous of you :P. How on EARTH do you write so well? I fear that if you do not become a published author I will cry because my life will be missing something!

...I seriously need to sort myself out. You have turned me into the sort of fan girl that I am scared of... XD

ANYWAY, onto the review. Your characterisation is absolutely flawless, as I have come to expect. Percy is just so [i]Percy[/i]! You have characterised him wonderfully, he's still pompous and work-orientated, and yet he's got a new dimension to him. He's done some growing up, but the essence of Percy is still well and truly intact.

I LOVE her new office. It's a rather hilarious scenario to observe! Right now she's a complete fish out of water, but no doubt she'll fit in before long. Lionel and Noah and Dibble are so friendly, which is fabulous, but I also really like that we've got Madeleine to balance them out. I don't think she's a total witch, but she's not the nicest person in the world either.

And I can't wait to meet Darcy. We've heard about her and she seems to be the anti-Audrey in many respects, so I can't wait to meet her. I definitely see how Audrey and Percy could work, but at this point what I'm really wondering is how it's going to happen. He's been pretty rude to her, and although she doesn't seem the type to hold it against him I wonder how he will come round to the idea of going out with Audrey.

Once again, I really enjoyed all the little magical details you included for authenticity, and this really is my story of the moment ^_^.


Author's Response: Thanks, Jane! This review has absolutely made my day!

Percy is so much fun to write, especially because he's so complex (I think so, anyway). He's still the same basic Percy, but he has a heart, and it will reveal itself!

I'm glad you liked the part about her new office. I was worried it got a little boring. And yes, the characters are so much fun to write, especially with their quirky dynamic.

Darcy should be fun (I hope!) She is definitely the anti-Audrey in some ways, but I think that she will complement Audrey in a way that's similar to Vivian.

Percy has been rude! Bad Percy. XD He will redeem himself.

I'm really happy to hear you enjoy this so much, especially since I'm still pretty self-conscious about it. But thanks once again for the reviews! I'm working on the next chapter right now!


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Review #15, by whacked 

13th September 2009:
percy's characterisation is so ... percy! although he doesn't come off as reasonbaly attractive. i dunno. i always imagined him to be attractive, but so uptight it kind of diminished it. but it seriously difficult to take percy seriously when he talk all prim and proper, and all i can see in my mind's eye is his bright red hair.
this isnt my usual pairing, but me likey! 10/10

Author's Response: Oh, trust me, I imagine Percy to be attractive, too! And Audrey will also see him that way, most definitely. I didn't make a big deal out of it in this chapter because I didn't want it to be over-the-top romance, especially given how Percy was acting...and I figured Audrey would be so worried and self-conscious, she might not be thinking about how cute he is. XD

But don't worry, that part will come soon!

I'm going to have a lot of fun exploring this pairing -- they're really not written very often, and I do like Percy so I wanted to give him some romance.

Thanks for all of your reviews today! You're so kind! :-)

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Review #16, by SnitchSnatcher 

12th September 2009:
Yay! You updated! Or rather, the chapter was validated!


Anyway, onwards with my review.

In short, I loved it! And here is why.

For one, the people in her department are awesome, including Madeleine. Actually, I think she's my favourite aside from Noah. I might be biased about Noah, though, because that's one of my best friend's names. And he's just flat out awesome. The fact that he laughs at his own jokes is funny. Dibble seems like a pretty cool bloke and I like Lionel too, though I'm not going to lie. As soon as I read his name, I started singing "Dancin' on the Ceiling". So, uh, forgive me.

Now, we get to my favourite part: PERCY!


Seriously, Melanie. Your characterization of him is just...wow, I can't find a word other than spectacular. He's got a lot of the characteristics of old Percy, but you can see so much potential there. Obviously he's still dedicated to his work, but you can just see that he's different. Especially when she dropped the files and apologised. Old Percy would've gotten all riled up, but you can tell he was restraining his temper. And I love that so so so much!

I can't wait to see where you take this, Melanie. But I'm sure that whatever direction you go, it will be awesome for a plethora of reason, the primary one being that you're you and everything you right is, like, stellar.

Just like this.

So. In summary, I LOVED IT. AND I CAN'T WAIT FOR THE NEXT UPDATE! /abuse of capslock.

Great job!


Author's Response: Hi, Molly! Thanks for the wonderful review!

All of these new characters are really fun to write. Madeleine is funny because, if truth be told, she does have a lot in common with my sister, except that my sister is actually nicer (I ran Madeleine's characterization past my sister, to make sure it was cool with her, and she thought it was awesome, LOL...she was the one who requested that I name a character after her anyway). And yes, Noah is a nice guy, as is Lionel -- they're all one big happy family, and much more casual and informal than Audrey is used to in a work environment. The staff of this office was fairly heavily influenced by my coworkers where I used to work. ^_^

Percy is amazingly fun to write. He has his flaws, but he is just so much fun to deal with as a character. And yes, you hit the nail on the head with his characterization -- he hasn't completely changed, and he'll always be the Percy we know and love, but he has matured a little bit. That also makes him somewhat difficult to write -- especially in later chapters -- because I think his personality is still very much in flux at this point.

Thanks so much for the review, seriously, it made me so happy! Chapter 3 is in the works as we speak. ^_^

Lots of love,

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Review #17, by Jellyman 

12th September 2009:
I joke :) This title is much more professional looking :P

As per usual, I A-D-O-R-E-D this :) I really do just love your Audrey - I want to give her a massive bear hug 99% of the time. You rarely see such innocent and naive characters in fanfiction, so it really is refreshing. Not everyone is sarcasm and temper, you know?

My new boss, Demetrius Dibble, was the anti-Sheldon.
I think this was the perfect description for the whole department - and the name "Sheldon" never fails to make me giggle :D But yes, everything is so different! I feel a bit sorry for Audrey - she's going to have to step it up a notch if she wants to keep us with these guys!

I wasnít sure how to tell him that the prospect of doing research and writing reports was much less frightening than the idea of trying to impress a roomful of new people.
Oh, that is such an Audrey thing to say/think :P I love her!!

OH AND PERCY WAS PERFECT. Seriously, no words can describe the perfection of his characterisation. I really resent him for how he treated Audrey though! And I must say, I was a bit disappointed with the lack of paper-flying in the first interaction (I sound like such a nerd :P), but you definitely made up for it in the second one :P

Overall, brilliant follow-up chapter - the new characters introduced look very interesting and while this lacks the charm of the first chapter (what with the rosebush and what not), it really works in your favour. It really contrasts what Audrey finds comfortable and how easily she is intimidated. "Something Different", indeed :D

Excellent work, Mel.

Author's Response: Hahaha, I know, the chapter title!! I actually meant to include something about that in my author's note -- I can't believe I forgot to!

I'm so glad Audrey is still working out for you as a reader -- she really is very docile, so hopefully I can just highlight her personality in contrast to all of the strong personalities that surround her.

The name "Sheldon" makes me laugh, too. I got the idea from the movie When Harry Met Sally, when Sally talks about dating a guy named Sheldon. It's such a nerdy name (no offense to any Sheldons currently reading this!)

Yay for Percy! Er -- I mean, very poorly behaved Percy! Fear not...he shall (hopefully) redeem himself. And then we can all have a Percy lovefest. *hugs Percy*

I wanted the paper-flying so much in the first interaction. I really did. But I started thinking it would be uber-cliche. Not that I'm known for avoiding cliches or anything, but I'm ok with how it turned out this way -- hopefully I was still able to bring out some of his personality in the first interaction anyway, with how impatient he was. And then that set up Audrey's nervousness enough that her dropping a whole stack of files the second time around was believable enough.

Hopefully there will be a little more charm in the next chapter -- Vivian will be back, and we'll also meet Audrey's friend Darcy. And there will be crossword puzzles and pubs, and Percy will hopefully be somewhat squishable (the way I'm currently planning the chapter, anyway -- subject to change, of course!)

Thanks for the review! It made me happy! *hugs*


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Review #18, by blithering_humdinger 

12th September 2009:
I loved it! I really like your interpretation of Percy and Audrey and I would like to read more.

Author's Response: Thank you! I'm working on the next chapter right now! ^_^

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