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36 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Emily1990 

19th September 2014:
hi, the name Marauder was definitely a secret. I think there was a bit where Snape had a bit of an idea, when he finds Harry with the Map, but it wasn't obvious, just a suggestion that he might have known.

Author's Response: Yes I think Snape knew who wrote the Map, but I don't think the whole school called them the Marauders. Glad you agree!
cheers Mel


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Review #2, by nott theodore 

7th July 2014:
This was a great chapter! It was really nice reading about all the gifts that Laura got for her birthday since it's such an important birthday for her. Although I feel like she needs to be a bit wary of Bertram - I'm sure that he means well and does like her, but he's not making much of an effort to get to know the person that he's dating, especially if he thinks that gaudy cloak is something she'd like! And then the anonymous gift was so much better and I'm suspecting that it's from Sirius, which may be a little cliche but I think it's really cute. Would the fact Laura's dating Bertram explain why Sirius has been so grumpy lately? I loved the conversation at night too!

It made me laugh that the girls had found out the boys' secret in calling themselves Marauders, but there's still more for them to find out, clearly. The party was a really fun scene and I enjoyed reading it, especially when Sirius was spiking everyone's drinks and then pretending that the underage drinkers weren't allowed anything. Bertram was very presumptuous though, and I feel even more like Laura needs to be careful with him now!

Sian :)
Gryffindor House Cup 2014 Review

Author's Response: lol. Yes, the cloak. It sounds appalling, doesn't it? So yeah, Bertram is trying, but like I said he doesn't actually pay attention to her, just this idea of what he thinks she is like. And what he thinks she does like. Sigh.

I really like Sirius in this chapter too. I'm quite proud of the midnight conversatoin in the common room, and yes, spiking people's drinks. But don't you think that's exactly what he would have been doing?

cheers Mel


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Review #3, by Olga 

31st December 2012:
Manicure, most definitely! Awesome chapter!

Ps- i like the anonymous gift:-)

Author's Response: thank you! And I did get that manicure, though from memory it was a little delayed. All good though. Glad you liked it! :)

cheers, Mel


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Review #4, by Slytherinbabe 

1st August 2012:
I have a feeling it was Sirius who sent Laura the clasp.

Author's Response: Might have been. Might not have, too. All will be revealed later :D

cheers, Mel


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Review #5, by Lillylover22 

1st March 2012:
I dont really like bertram. 9/10 : )

Author's Response: Nor did a lot of other people! I'm afraid he's very much of a type. :)

cheers, Mel


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Review #6, by singer123 

13th December 2011:
The party scene was perfect!!
I think Bertram is a git and is going out with Laura just to sleep with her.

Author's Response: Well, Bertram is very much of a type. There are plenty of them around and they can be much more transparent than they think. But I think he's an important experience for Laura to have. And that's all I'm going to say about him :D

cheers, Mel


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Review #7, by classicblack 

18th October 2011:
Let me guess, the anonymous gift is from Sirius? And it does actually make sense to have the Marauder name be a secret. It was a nice change from other fics who made it their real nickname. Like Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs, 'the Marauders' is a secret nickname no one knows about, and I'm glad you made it stay that way. After all, no one knows they're Animagi. I wonder if Laura will ever find out about the Marauders Map...?
And I actually didn't expect too much from the party; it was actually more like how you wrote it. Oh and Betram is siriusly starting to get on my nerves; he puts us Hufflepuffs to shame (I'm a Pottermore puff ;)). Please make Laura dump him! I think the only reason she likes him is because he was the the first boy to treat her like a woman... ah well. It'd be a huge spot of drama (and it would greatly aggravate me) if Laura's first night with a bloke was with Betram. Ah well.
Brilliant job overall!
Until next chapter,
classicblack

Author's Response: My lips are sealed about the gift - that's revealed later. Though I think you've got that far by now already (sorry my responses are taking so long!!!) so it's perhaps not such a spoiler after all.

I'm glad you liked my take on the Marauder nickname, though. I thought it might not be the common knowledge some other fics make it, and it was a nice twist.

Oh, and I'm a Pottermore Puff as well, and I"m happy to say that Bertram is in a lot of ways not representative of that house. He is though very much of a type which I suspect is prevalent in all houses. You are absolutely right though in that the only reason she's with him is he's the first to treat her as a woman who is desirable. When you've always considered yourself pretty much undateable, that's a powerful attraction.

cheers, Mel


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Review #8, by alicia and anne 

11th August 2011:
Laura doesn't really seem to be as into Bertram as she'll like to be, he does like to buy her things and take her to places she doesn't want to be.
Who is that present from? is it another secret admirer? or could it possibly be from Sirius?
My my Sirius is being rude abour Bertram, definantely jealous! Although Laura and Sirius have gone back to listing things, they like to do that don't they?
:-O they've entered the boys dorm? it sounds exactly how I imagined it to be! even the shrine to Lily :-D Can't believe that they have a marauders poster though! I think the girls are going to have fun taunting them!
Bertram doesn't like the marauders? he is quite a bit controlling isn't he? and he is a bit presumptuous!
I wonder how the boys are going to get into the girls dormitory? I am loving the interactions between the boys and girls. You didn't dissapoint in the slightest, you could never dissapoint me! :-D You're awesome!

alicia and anne
Slytherin

Author's Response: Yes, there is definitely a divide between Laura and Berram when it comes to attraction. He's into her and she's willing to be convinced by him, but isn't there yet. Glad that's coming out in the narrative. :)

And yeah,there's not much love lost between Bertram and the Gryffie boys. And that's all I'm going to say about that.

cheers, Mel


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Review #9, by In The Shadows I Dwell 

6th August 2011:
What else can I say aside from yet another perfect chapter, but I'd never expect anything less than perfect from you with this story. I am continually impressed as the story continues, sliding in the small canon details here and there until the entire story really just has now created a canon all of it's own. I'm going to say that I think I know who the gift is from, then again I always like to try and guess anyway even if I'm wrong in the end, although I'm fairly sure I'm going to be at least somewhat close *cough* Sirius... *cough*

I was most certainly not disappointed with the party scene, and it's good to see that Bertram is displaying his true colours at last, as cheesy as he is, I imagined there was something a little, (if not a lot) fishy about him and his motives. I also love the developments with the Marauder's and how they attempt to cover up their tracks when they realise the girls know their secret nickname, and now I'm left wondering whether they actually know how to get up those stairs or not... So I continue onwards to find out...

- Ash (InTheShadowsIDwell)
(Gryffindor)

Author's Response: Yes, good old Bertram. He's representative of a type of teenaged boy which is oh so common but not necessarily what most girls are looking for. Though I will say that much of the cheese is genuine, he's just like that (and thinks that all girls like it too). As for getting up the stairs, well my lips are sealed. All will be revealed in due course. :D

cheers, Mel


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Review #10, by girly1393 

5th June 2011:
Yes, your fingers definitely deserve a manicure.

Sirius' jealousy is beginning to get funny.

Bertram. I cannot wait to see how things end with him. Ooh, that was harsh. I'm glad Laura's happy, but we know they end, right? I'm just wondering what kind of guy he is, in terms of how he'll react.

Bravo to you.

Author's Response: You'll be pleased to know that I did get that manicure - I thought I deserved it too. :) I agree that Sirius is getting funny, especially since he has absolutely no idea why he's behaving that way. Poor boy, I'm so cruel to him. As for Bertram, well I know you've read it all now so I don't need to say anything, do I? *grins*

cheers, Mel


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Review #11, by theelderwand 

20th August 2010:
Odd what strikes you in a tale, isn't it? Cerridwyn I thought was an excellent name for an owl.

I got a real kick out of Sirius staying up waiting for Laura. The whole "Nice Cloak" thing was great, as was the slightly veiled "Are you a good witch, or a bad witch" line. LOL!

Loved the party! Right down to the fine details of which Marauder was responsible for what. Nice flourish too, that "The Marauders" is a bit of a secret, somthing they're hanging onto since childhood. Cool.

That said, I see it coming, but I really can't wait for Laura to give whathisname the boot in favor of sirius. Sooner the better.

Oh, and never apologize for your muse. I thought everything was just where it should be, and, even if I didn't, you're the author. The story turns out as you wish. that's the whole idea, isn't it?

Cheers

Eldy

Author's Response: I hate to break it to you, but Sirius actually WAS staying up waiting for James. That "Oh, that was today, wasn't it" was quite genuine - they'd been out the night before for the full moon and therefore had missed breakfast and all the morning birthday-related stuff. I will admit that the "nice cloak" and "are you good or bad" was kinda cool, though. I was pretty pleased when I came up with those ones. :)

As for the marauder nickname, well to be honest I never really thought of it as something the whole school would know, so when I started reading fanfics and they would proclaim it loudly or they were known even by first years as that, it kinda took me by surprise. So, when I decided to write my own tale, it was their little secret, so to speak. I thought it fitted them better as I'd interpreted them. :)

cheers, Mel

PS Cerridwyn was a Welsh saint (or something like that, I forget now). It seemed to fit. Glad you liked it!


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Review #12, by Capella Black 

14th August 2010:
A manicure is indeed required in order to thank your fingers for this awesome chapter. I loved Sirius' actions in this - is he jealous? Does he have some kind of interest in Laura? It's impossible to tell. On that note, exactly who is the anonymous gift from? If it was Sirius, then you'd have thought he'd have learnt his lesson from this instant when sending the Firebolt to Harry - anonymous gifts alert suspicion, not gratitude! Still, it's all pretty awesome, and I don't think the party was a let down at all - any more development would have felt rushed compared to the story general, whereas this just implied a gentle continuation, which fits much better.

Must read more!

Author's Response: Hi again!

You will be pleased to know that I did indeed get a manicure after I posted this chapter, though it was a little delayed from memory. It was within a month, in any case.

As for the gift, well my lips are sealed, though it could be argued that the circumstances were a little different so he wouldn't necessarily have made that connection if it was indeed from him. (Spoilers again, you understand.)

thanks again, Mel


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Review #13, by doglover 

11th August 2010:
i find it funny, if of course the gift was from sirius, that his anonymous gifts always hafta be checked for jinxes.

Author's Response: Yes, you would think that someone so smart would think of things like that. If it's from him,of course, hahaha. I give nothing away!

cheers, Mel


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Review #14, by HermioneTwin44 

7th July 2010:
I really liked this! I think it's nice that the whole school doesn't call them the Maraurders. It's a different angle and i like it. Can't say i like the boyfriend he's almost too gentlemeny.

Author's Response: Hi again!

Yes, I never thought that the whole school called them the Marauders, so I thought that I'd include it in this story just for something a bit different. Glad you appreciated it!

cheers, Mel


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Review #15, by Schnatz 

22nd May 2010:
Hey,

I know it has been a while since I read and review.
I liked this chapter and I love your girls more and more. They are just great and make me laugh often. So do the marauders but the marauders I like in almost every story because I naturally like this boys. But it has happened not so often before that I really like Lily's friends. You made them some authentic and lovely girls and everybody has his own character and story. They are not only Lily's friends, do you know what I mean? Difficult to discribe ...

The scene when Mary spied on the boy's dorm reminded me on some similar thing I did when I was sixteen ... not spie out a boy's dorm because I wasn't going to a boarding school but spie out the boy's changing room for our sport-lessons ;D I laughed a lot in this scene. It feels like I was 16/17 again and sitting in their room, too. You did a good job with that scene!

And then the end of the first passage where 'drunken' Laura want to go to bed and Sirius is going on her nerves. That was just brilliant, I loved this scene! They, Laura and Sirius, are so cute together. ;-)

I also liked the party even if it was not so long as I've expected this scene. Anyway, I liked it.

The only thing which I didn't like in this chapter was Bertram. Sorry but he gets more and more disagreeable. He has something in his personality and his acts that make me want to grimace with antipathy. This little brown nose! :P

I'm looking forward to read the next chapters and hope that I'll find time to read more than only 1, 2 or 3 chapters during this long weekend. ;-)

Till then, Schnatz

Author's Response: Hi again! Thanks for the review!

And don't apologise for not reading & reviewing in a while, I've been horrendously behind on review responses so I'm no better than you are. But we both make it eventually, right?

Anyway I'm glad you liked this chapter. I was very fond of that little chat with Sirius in the middle of the night myself - something about it just worked. Then again, there was something about those two characters that made their interactions very easy to write so maybe that had something to do with it. I'm sorry you were disappointed in the party scene but I really didn't know what I could do to add to it, and the chapter was long enough already, so I thought it would just have to do.

And Bertram? A lot of people didn't like him that much. That is, however, all I'll say - you'll see what happens with him as you read on.

cheers, Mel


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Review #16, by alyosha 

18th May 2010:
What I meant in my previous review when I made reference to your imagination was not only the goats, but other things like them too. It is not only the most absurd things, such as Jame's pranks, but even the most mundane that strike me as quite creative. There have been many cases where I have been fascinated by the things you include in your story. For instance, small details like Beatrice's spells (espcially the one that makes everyone's parchment four inches shorter than it needs to be) and the articles in the newspapers that Larua and co. read every morning are all quite inventive. I know that I personally could never really write anything like that were I ever prevailed upon to do so.

I mean, of course there are times when you are relying on canon quite heavily, like how the curriculum is set out almost exactly as it was for Harry (so not much of your own imagination is needed there), and other times when you make canon-references (to people like Olive Hornby, Remus's rabbit, Snape's worst memory, Ogden etc.). But even so, none of these things call into question your creativity or inventiveness. After all, it's really only logical that such references form part of, if not the majority of, the underlying fabric of your story.

And another thing that is probably worth mentioninging, but related all the same, is that, through your inclusion of these things aforementioned, you really help engender the same vibe that JKR did. In other words, your Hogwarts feels like Hogwarts. Of course there are a thousand other Marauder stories out there (and most of those are set at Hogwarts too), but what sets yours apart is the atmosphere.

It might have something to do with the constant name-dropping of canon characters, or the fact that you include classes with actual course-content happening in them, or also that you include mealtimes, telling us what the characters are eating whilst there, all of which culminate to give the same sense of Hogwarts that Rowling created.

I should also like to point out that some of the stuff "Laura and co." say is rather humorous. The bantering between them is probably the funniest part of your story, and they can be quite insightful as well. However, in contrast, they can sometimes be painfully superficial. But I don't feel like getting into that.

I mean, I would bother to point out the things I dislike about your story, but I think it's a waste of time since they're obviously not there to impress the likes of me, given that I'm not even remotely who you were writing this for.

Author's Response: Hi again! Thanks for the review!

Wow. You may not believe me but to be honest, those spells of Bea's, and the various pranks and the like were actually the hardest part of this fic to write. I don't rate my own imagination very highly at all (one reason I lean on canon so heavily) and to be honest it took simply AGES to come up with those things ... I hated how long it took me to think of things that were mentioned once and that was it, but I felt like they had to be there. So I'm really thrilled that you think so highly of what I did come up with because it means that my imagination may not be as deficient as I had thought. :D

I'm also thriilled that you think my Hogwarts feels like the one JKR created, with course content, food at the meals etc. I did try to emulate her style to some extent because the point of this story was to have something that could reasonably be seen as a prequel, and that of course means lessons and other school things, so I'm glad you appreciate that.

I am curious though as to what you don't like ... while I admit that you're not in my target audience, the fact that you've read as far as you have in this story means that it is clearly appealing to you in some way, but if I can learn how to broaden its appeal by eliminating those things that you dislike (or at least cutting them down somewhat) then that would make me improve as a writer. I accept that some of the conversation is superficial, but then again girl talk is often superficial so I'm not sure how much is my writing style and how much is the content, if that makes any sense. In other words, I want to know if you're seeing things that I'm not, and if you don't tell me then I can never learn, can I? (Of course, if you don't want to go into it I will understand, but I just wanted to flag that just because you're not a member of the target audience it doesn't mean that your views are valued any less. If anything, I probably value them more.)

I must also say that your saying that the atmosphere of my fic sets is apart from the million and one other Marauder stories out there is also a significant compliment so thank you for that. You've probably worked out that a lot of work went into this story so it's great to have that validated by comments like that. Thank you!

cheers, Mel


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Review #17, by ochalke5 

6th January 2010:
Oh my god! I loved it! Loved it! And I for surely do not like that boyfriend of Laura's. And... I can't decide between Remus and Sirius for the necklace... I'd like to say Sirius but then again, Remus was with her when she went to pick the flower... but Sirius was behind her, no? But anwyways, i just want to see what happens next! And i surely hope she ditches her boyfriend. He's trouble.
10/10
Mel, the chapters just get better and better, but you already know that don't you darling?
Natalie

Author's Response: Hi again!

Ah, so you don't like Bertram. You're not alone - some people hated him, some quite liked him. But he's not around forever, otherwise you could have me up for false advertising. As for the clasp, well that's revealed later, but you shouldn't forget that just after she'd picked the daffodil she was hauled up by Filch for tracking snow into the castle. Remember that scene?

cheers, Mel


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Review #18, by pinaygrl3123 

26th December 2009:
Woo, for birthdays. Haha. Bertram, you're sweet.. but at least get to know the damn girl before trying to stay the night. Geez. And they were all right! That was rather presumptuous. But the party does sound fun, hehe. And that was a beautiful present from the anonymous person, even if it could have been jinxed or whatnot. And haaa, stumbling in after curfew, that's amazing. And dun, dun, dun.. the girls finally know about The Marauders. Haha. And I wonder if they'll ever make it into the girls' dorm room.. that'd be funny. (:

Author's Response: Hi again!

Yes, you're right, Bertram was rather presumptuous. His judgement isnt' always the best - something like James in that regard,only James grows out of it. But it's all part and parcel of teenaged relationships, isn't it?

I'm very pleased you liked the conversation with Sirius in the middle of the night on her birthday, I was pretty pleased with that one myself. I think I said in the author note that I had a vague idea of what I wanted and then my fingers went running off on their own and came up with that. (And yes, I did get that manicure.) And yes, the whole Marauders thing - I never really thought the whole school called them that so this was my take on that whole thing.

As for the boys getting into the girls' dorm ... that's coming up hahaha.

cheers, Mel


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Review #19, by Pixelen 

14th October 2009:
I think your fingers definitely deserve a manicure. :) Hmmm... I wonder who the necklace could be from? *wink*

Author's Response: Hi again! Thanks for reviewing!

You will be pleased to know that I did get that manicure. :D As for the clasp, well I'm saying nothing. Sorry! But all is revealed later on so you can't expect me to give out too many spoilers, can you?

cheers, Mel


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Review #20, by MYHEART BELONGS TO WOOD 

14th October 2009:
Sirius is seeing her as a person and actually listening to what she likes. That bracelet seems to be not only beautiful but thoughtfullness as well. This party seemed to be fun!!! Now Bertram assuming that no dotn think so! How are they going to get upstairs?

Author's Response: Hi again!

I am saying nothing about the clasp and who it's from. Sorry! But yes, it is lovely. :D As for the boys getting upstairs, well that's revealed much later on so I'm saying nothing here.

And Bertram. Not exactly subtle, was he? But then again, fairly typical for an 18 year old boy in a lot of ways.

thanks for the review!
Mel


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Review #21, by amazing_bouncing_ferret 

8th October 2009:
Loved this chapter. It was very entertaining and insightful. Just one thing. Didn't the boys leave a note saying they'd been in the girls' room ages ago?

Author's Response: Hi there! Thanks for the review! :D

I don't know if you've been reading ahead or not, but this does happen - just in a later chapter. If you havent' been reading ahead then you may be confusing my fic with another one, which does happen - there are 60,000 stories on this site so it can be easy to get mixed up. :)

Anyway I'm very pleased that you liked this chapter, I was pretty pleased with it myself. *grins*

cheers, Mel


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Review #22, by nire 

19th September 2009:
Iíd found someone who thought I was beautiful and was treating me like a queen, and what more could any girl want?
Um, Sirius?

Mary, Lily, Martha and Charlotte had gotten together and bought me a selection of lacy lingerie, which they insinuated would be useful in the coming months with Bertram.
Stuff Bertram! Use it on Sirius instead! Hahahah, hilarious! I bet Martha would have been at the root of that evil though lol.

It contained a small box, which contained a golden clasp, elegantly engraved with daffodils.
AW SIRIUS! Lol! This is amazing! He saw he picking those daffodils before and remembered! That is so delightful. My heart is just about to burst! I love it! He is the best.

with a strange symbol below that I didnít recognise.
Black family emblem maybe? Or perhaps Sirius made up for himself? Either way, i love it. I think it is adorable.

ďWaiting for James,Ē he said. ďWe had separate detentions tonight and heís not back from his yet. Penrose can keep you pretty late sometimes.Ē
I bet James wasnít even in detention. I reckon he was waiting up for her because he is in love with her. Hahahah. Iím pathetic, arenít I?

Oh and I canít believe they didnít know they called themselves the Marauders yet! That was a brilliant idea!

Aw damn, I only have one chapter left until Iím up to date! Then Iím going to be waiting like everyone else!

Have you got TA status yet?

10/10!

Author's Response: Hi again!

No, I do not have TA status. I have to wait on the queue like everyone else. And the next chapter should be up hopefully sometime early to mid next week. Sorry!!

Okay. You're spot on, Martha was at the root of the lingerie idea, though Mary was a very willing co-conspiritor. I did like it though.

And yes, cliche secret gift time. You've picked up on a couple of things that no one else did but that's all I'm saying about that. I can't have too many of my plot points let out too soon can I?

And I'm sorry to disappoint you but James WAS on detention and Sirius WAS waiting for him. He had forgotten it was Laura's birthday (that "Oh, right, that was today" was quite genuine) but I think he was glad he saw her. And he thought her being drunk was hilarious, as I'm sure you gathered.

Thanks for the feedback on the Marauder idea. I'd just never heard them called that until I found fanfic and so I thought it probably wasn't a widely-known thing. If they called themselves that at all - the Map may have just been christened that as an aid to marauders of Hogwarts. So I thought I'd throw that in. :D

Thanks for another fantastic review! My head is expanding as I type. *goes off to get it back to its proper size*

cheers, Mel


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Review #23, by samitaclover 

11th September 2009:
PLEASE UPDATE SOON!

ur loyal reviewer,
~clover

Author's Response: Thanks clover! The next chapter has been in the queue for over a week now so hopefully it will be validated soon - things always seem to take a while after the queue has been closed for a bit and I get the feeling the staff have been feeling a little overwhelmed of late. But fingers crossed. :)

Thanks again for reading and reviewing, I really do appreciate it.

cheers, Mel


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Review #24, by marauders_girl11 

9th September 2009:
alas, another chapter! yeah! sorry it took so long for my to FINALLY read it, but i've been pretty busy lately, and haven't had much time for anything!

upgrade soon,

-Nickole.

Author's Response: Hey, you don't need to apologise to me! You're doing me a favour by reading it at all, so when you have time to get around to it is your business. :)

Having said that, thanks for reviewing again, it does make me feel loved. Hope you enjoyed it!

cheers, Mel


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Review #25, by 11GUPTA11 

8th September 2009:
Your story is one of the best I have ever read on this website. It is addicting. I am always on the edge of my seat waiting for the next installment. Hope it comes soon.

Author's Response: Wow, what a flattering review! Thank you so much, 11GUPTA11! *beams*

It's so nice to get reviews from new people and ones like this just make my day. And you will be pleased to know that the next chapter should be up any day now, depending on validation of course and how the queue moves.

thanks again, I'm just grinning from ear to ear :)
Mel


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