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57 Reviews Found

Review #1, by dirtydeedsdonedirtcheap 

22nd February 2015:
It was probably a good thing because Nia had a sign reading ďDo Me, CaptainĒ and I didnít think she was talking about Kay Davies. Where were the teachers? How was that sign even allowed?

Honestly though!

which would be fun and it would probably tickle.

Just, what goes on in your head?

That match was great! I donít love Quidditch game chapters but you always know when to stop and when to add action and pull back so itís not a chore reading it. Avery and her Father seem to be making amends. I have no comment.

Well, maybe just one. Donít be too quick to trust him.

Paloma has a thing for the Al man, you go Al.

And Wes and Lily are so going to date. Pft, James has no control over anyone on the team including himself.

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Review #2, by Jaime88367 

4th September 2013:
Awesome job on the quidditch match, I could picture the whole thing! I liked that Avery is at least trying to give her dad a chance. It shows how good of a person she is. Finally, yay James got a clue about Albums, it's about flippin' time.

Author's Response: Quidditch matches are some of my favorite things to write. Thanks so much!

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Review #3, by Manga_girl 

27th April 2012:
Another amazing chapter! So funny! 10/10

Author's Response: thank you so much! I hope you enjoy the rest!

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Review #4, by Lolz! 

1st November 2011:
Lol the last parts are always da best !

Author's Response: Completely agree, haha. They make my day. Thank you so much for the review!

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Review #5, by HermioneFan 

5th August 2011:
Do you like Owl City? Every song by him i always think of Javery!!

Author's Response: I LOVE OWL CITY YOU ARE AWESOME.

Yes, actually, I use them are writing music frequently. SUBLIMINAL.

Thank you!!


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Review #6, by roxyroxtheworld 

28th June 2011:
love all of it but my favorite part is for sure the part where after the quidditch match then bink, freddie, and james are telling wes how much he doesn't know about grades lol love it!!! also happy that al seems happier and can't wait to read more!!! also lol woman are crazy arent they lol sometimes =)

Author's Response: I love that part so much, haha. Wesley is such a little heir. He's wonderful. And james still doesn't trust him, lol. And yes, women are SO crazy sometimes. I know this :) Thanks so much for the review!

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Review #7, by munchies 

19th April 2011:
HJRTHJTSHN i was dying laughing when James said "Then how did you know she was a girl?" About Aves. Makes me laugh so much.

lol, Wes has bad grades. Poor Wesley! I'm sure Lily thinks indifferent ;)




Avery :)

Author's Response: HAHA. I love tha tpart. I can totally imagine him with narrowed eyes and his nose all scrunched up just glaring at Wesley. So ridiculous. Thank you so much!

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Review #8, by Lillylover22 

16th April 2011:
i loved the quidditch game!! sorry no quote this chapter. oh well 9/10 =]

Author's Response: BOOO!

I'm just kidding. Thank you so much for the review! I really appreciate all of them!


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Review #9, by busybusybeta 

3rd February 2011:
Omg, this chapter was filled with so much action! it was a really fun read; i loved all of the random rambling james' mind kept going through.
Okay. You simply HAVE to tell me who gets punched in the face! Oh fine...i'll just go read the next chapter. =D

Author's Response: James's mind ramblings are what help me sleep at night. He's just a riot. Sometimes my mind does that and I'm glad I write James like that so I just don't feel so darn alone :) As for who gets punched in the face...you'll see!

Thanks!


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Review #10, by me_thehplvr 

2nd January 2011:
SOMEONE GETS PUNCHED.

Okay loved the chapter, but I must move on to see who gets hit(:

Glad you had a HP filled birthday!

Author's Response: YES PUNCHING. I do love it. Thank you so much for the review!

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Review #11, by rachm34 

28th September 2010:
Hi again, I am loving reading more chapters. I must tell you that I love to get within Jamesí mind for a story. Oh, and my cat Clyde, is sitting next to me and I am laughing out loud while reading this story and he is just staring at me. He reminds me of Victoria in a way. I wish I could feed him ties though. Heís such a darling little pet.

ANYWAY, to your story. I LOVE this chapter.

This line made me laugh right off the bat: The stands were completely packed with scarlet and gold and ugly Ravenclaw colors.

Of course James would not approve of reffing stuff. I feel as if that seems a little bit beyond his mind. Haha. Personally, I think that he makes a great captain. The dedication for his sport shows that he can most definitely can handle a job such as this important captainship. He is so serious about it too. I bet he is teaching the members on the team a lot, even though you didnít say much about that. I really think this was such a well written chapter. Haha.

Haha, Fred and his women. Of course he would have done someone else on the Ravenclaw team. I like how James thinks about this. Haha, and doesnít seem very concerned either that he is thinking about all of his best matesí girls heís been with.

I love being inside Jamesí head. There is something about it that just makes it so funny. OH MY GOD- my cat just came and bit my foot. Why canít he just stop. THAT HURT. Sorry, Iím digressing, and providing you with so much information that you probably donít need to hear about my own life. But, inside Jamesí head everything just seems so hilarious. Seriously, I wish that James was one of my best friends. UGH, why canít he be real. That would be so bloody wonderful.

I would be so proud of Avery, she is such a good keeper. Iíd like to have her on my team. Poor Jamesy and the bludger! DONíT YOU GUYS GO AFTER MUH MAN! I LOVE HIM AND HE CANNOT BE HURT. Oh, and just so you know, I am typing this review as I read your story. So yes, this review is probably long and full of a lot of my personal thoughts and it is indeed in chronological order. I hope that it lets me post all of this.

HAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHA. Niaís sign. I just died. And how James was joking and how it wasnít about Kay Davies. OH my gosh, you have me cracking out aloud over here. Thatís so funny. I would not want to be thinking about that while I was playing Quidditch. Now, my cat is using me as a rubbing post. SERIOUSLY? I would like a pygmy puff for the moment. I think that would be nice.

I am cracking up about how Jamesí is thinking about all the girls on the team who did Fred and the conversations they would have. That is hysterical. Jamesí personal thoughts are definitely one of my favorite things to read in this story.

WOW. SERIOUSLY. FRED I WOULD BREAK UP WITH DAVIES. WHAT A B-IÖ YOU GET THE PICTURE. I DONíT WANT MY REVIEWING PRIVILEDGES TAKEN A WAY. But, REALLY. THAT MAKES ME MAD. AND how the Madam Horrible Ref, nice nickname Jamsey. Real original. Thatís funny though.

Haha, foul loathsome woman. James makes me laugh. I am cracking up here. This review is already close to six hundred words. Please let me post it. Maybe, I shouldnít type anymore and give you the end of my chapter thoughts. But, wait. I like typing.

HAHAHAHA, Meta Maggot. What a charming nickname. Oh dear, James. I agree. WHY IS HE SO HOT AND FICTIONAL? SERIOUSLY CANíT HE BE MINE? Hahaha, Meta is so rude. I hate her.

Oh, Scorpy and LawsonÖ Sitting in a tree. K-I-SSing How funny James is knowing what Scorpy is doing to Lawson.

Meta is seriously disgusting. How can she be disrespectful to her own team and friends.

OH HOW THE HECK. WHO BROUGHT GLITTER to a Quidditch match? I giggled so hard. How random. YAY GRYFFINDOR. FIRST WIN OF THE SEASON. TAKE THAT CLAWS! STUPID CLAWS! DIE DIE DIE!

Aw, I love Lily and how good she is of a sister to James. Seriously, that is so cute.

SOMEONE BETTER GET AVERYíS DAD SOME FASHION LESSONS, YO. WHAT A BAD SUIT. SERIOUSLY. I CAN JUST PICTURE IT IN MY MIND IN A PICTURE.

WHAT ANOTHER WONDERFUL CHAPTER. THIS REVIEW IS WELL OVER SEVEN HUNDRED WORDS AND MANY CAPS SO IT BETTER WELL POST. WOHO. I LIKE HAVING ALL MY CAPS RETURNED EVEN THOUGH IT SEEMS LIKE I AM YELLING. REALLY, IíM NOT. I AM JUST EXCITED. WHAT A GREAT WRITTEN CHAPTER THOUGH, SERIOUSLY. I AM GOING TO ALLOW MYSELF TO KEEP ON READING TODAY. EVEN THOUGH I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE A CHAPTER A DAY. SOMETIMES YOU JUST HAVE TO LET YOURSELF HAVE A PRESENT. LIKE THIS. WOW, I AM SO FUNNY SOMETIMES. NOT REALLY. WOW, THIS DOESNíT MAKE SENSE.

BUT SERIOUSLY, LOVE THIS LOVE THIS LOVE THIS. SORRY FOR SUCH A SCATTERBRAINED REVIEW THAT PROBABLY MADE NO SENSE. TELL VICTORIA I SAY HI, AND MISSED HER IN THIS CHAPTER. I HOPE SHE IS IN THE NEXT ONE.

Author's Response: I really think that's what makes this story so great, the ability to go inside of the mind of James Potter. That's what I love about Jane as well, but it's not quite as deep into her mind as it is into James's. Clyde sounds like a dear! Sounds like my kitten actually. She's finishing up her teething stage right now and still feels the need to bite everything. That includes me.

I think you're completely right about James being a great captain. Yeah, he can go a little crazy sometimes, but he's really good at it. I'll get more into detail later about how good of a captain he really is. Btw, your review just gave me an idea that I wrote down on a sticky note. From responding to reviews at work I now have 5 sticky notes of stuff to add in. See how important reviews are? lol! A lot of my ideas stem directly from them.

Nia's sign is funny every time I reread it. Oh, also it should let you post things over 1000 words no problem, but I have had one review that was so long I physically couldn't respond to it. Nire truly is a beast in the review department haha.

I like how the nicknames James comes up with aren't original, but they aren't horrible either, you know? Between Twitwards, Twataso, etc, I think he does okay for himself haha!!

I'm loving the "yo" you added to the end of your sentence. You would enjoy some of my tweets for that reason haha.

I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter! I really loved your review. It definitely made me laugh and gave me a little insight to YOU. Which is always fun :) thank you so much! I'm looking forward to reading more of your reviews...and don't worry, Victoria will be back. She's a bit of a diva to be honest haha!!


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Review #12, by MagicallyClumsie 

22nd March 2010:
haha this is amazing(: i want to know kay off her broom into the lake so she can be eaten by the squid*does anyone know a squids diet though really? i don't think he'd enjoy a claw. but he may get smarter if he did eat one right?*

Author's Response: Haha! Kay is probably a little tougher to digest. Maybe that's what the Giant Squid likes though. I think one of the group should interact with it. That could be an interesting scene to write. Thanks!

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Review #13, by doglover 

7th February 2010:
veeery niiice chapie!!!

Author's Response: I'm glad you liked it! I loved writing this one. So funny! Thank you!

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Review #14, by Ziska 

29th January 2010:
I liked this chapter. the quidditch parts were fun to read. I am glad that their team won or James might skip even more classes to prepare. I think you did a really good job describing what happens in the match. I think Nia would be the one to bring glitter to a quidditch match. :)

Author's Response: I'm glad you liked the Quidditch parts. It was really difficult to write from a Chaser's POV but I think it worked out well. Thanks for the review! Go Nia with glitter!

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Review #15, by dark_angel_14 

27th December 2009:
i went to the midnight showing all those months ago...haha but im in Cali on the coast...

~K.K~

Author's Response: Aren't midnight showings the best? Can't wait for the next one :) Thanks!

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Review #16, by isabella 

16th December 2009:
Is avery and james ever going to get together? No offense but im really hung up on the sequel instead of this.
Its just that james' life seems to be so happy besides his family and i thought he would at least get closer to avery...

Author's Response: I feel like everyone comes to this site looking for romance. This story is going to be around 50 chapters long. If so many other writers had a story that long the characters wouldn't even think about getting together until chapter like 40 or something absurd. Avery and James are best friends. I don't think overnight they are going to go from best friends to--oh my gosh we love each other, you know? There is a transition. Especially with James the way he is. There are subplots in the story that need to be worked out. I am trying to be as realistic as possible with the story. If they got together...now...where is the tension? The suspense? The plot? It would be boring. That's what so much of Keep Away was--tension.

And James is getting closer to Avery. In every chapter. Every single one has hints and moments all over it. I hope you continue to enjoy the story. Thank you so much for the review, I appreciate it.


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Review #17, by Lostaroundlondon 

2nd December 2009:
"I was born in July," one of them would say, twirling a hand around her brown hair.

"Oh yeah? How fascinating. I was actually born in November, but hey, I screwed Fred Weasley out by the lake," another would say.

"Oh! Wow. Me too! Let's be teammates and besties."


AHAHA another laugh. Oh and YAY ALBUS! i am happy for him! Although, I sincerely hope that Paloma won't cheat on him with James if they ever end up getting together.

btw, today I tried out the use of "twat berry"... according to one of my friends, it has a rather nasty meaning on urban dictionary .com or something. lol O wells. I thought it was a cute phrase. Funny too.

SUPERCALIFRAGELISTICEXPEALIDOCIOUS chappie! :D

Author's Response: That snippet is actually one of my favorites! I laughed so hard when I was editing that chapter. YAY ALBUS! I do enjoy him.

Yeah, it is a "made up" phrase but can be used for other things. It's more of "bean" that is used, not "berry", but the t word has a bad meaning (which is why it can only be in Mature stories). Not so much "cute phrase" haha.

Thanks so much!


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Review #18, by lokita95hp 

27th November 2009:
I so love this story...!!...
keep writing [it's a gift only a few have]
xoxo
trouble..!!...

Author's Response: I'm glad you're enjoying it! It's very fun to write. I make myself laugh. Thanks!

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Review #19, by Angam 

9th August 2009:
Hey, I've gotta say I've loved your story so far. It's awesome, and I've read it straight through up to this point, even though it's 2:30 in the morning. :-) Anyways, as far as this chapter goes the whole grades conversatioin at the end was freaking hilarious! Keep up the great work!

Author's Response: I'm glad you're enjoying it! It was so much fun to write and still is! Thanks for the review, hope you enjoy the rest!

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Review #20, by invisiblemaurader_1 

25th July 2009:
Hahahahahaha. I love the chapter title. And Meta's apparent inability to catch the Snitch. And Kay Davies's complaining. And Wesley's ignorance about grades. :)

Actually, I loved this chapter. Even if there was no Emerson. :( Every chapter should have Emerson in it. Because he's so deliciously...Emerson.

And face-punching is always fun. Maybe if we're lucky, it'll be Meta. ;)

Author's Response: I agree about Emerson. He should have just been hanging out waving a Gryffindor flag or something, who knows? Thanks so much!

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Review #21, by magicstick93 

22nd July 2009:
Oh, this is great, I'v been laughing my head off all the way through, it's really made my day absolutely hysterical.
Please update soon, it puts me in a good mood .x
=D

Author's Response: I'm so glad you're enjoying it! This story is so much fun to write. Even when I edit chapters I laugh all the way through. I promise to update very soon--before the weekend for sure :) Thanks!

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Review #22, by Akt312 

21st July 2009:
I love this story more and more every time I read it.

I secretly want James and Paloma to 'get together', I think it will cause major drama. I'm just not rooting for James and Avery to start a relationship. Either way, I love the story just the way it is.

Author's Response: I'm so glad you're enjoying it! Not quite sure why you're not rooting for James and Avery...but hey, to each his/her own, right? Thanks so much for the review!

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Review #23, by kirstie 

20th July 2009:
Hey,

i love that freddie has screwed the majority of the ravenclaw team. It is tres funny. I love this story. I keep making excuse from my homework to read the story haha. I love Avery and Lily but I am a little confused about why harry and james aren;t too close. I want to know. There for you are going to have to put up the next chapter.

10/10

Author's Response: You'll figure out more about Harry and James in the future. I'm very glad you're enjoying the story! I love writing it! Thank you for the review!

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Review #24, by madelgranger 

18th July 2009:
fun chapter! James is hilarious. there's not a whole lot else to say, actually. I liked the whole Fred-and-the-Ravenclaw-team bit. anyways, great chapter thanks for writing!

Author's Response: Oh, dear Freddie. He should probably keep it in his pants. Perhaps. Thanks!

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Review #25, by jesstierney 

18th July 2009:
I loved the quidditch match. I just love quidditch in general. I dont think i could ever play it, but still in my head yeahh i can. Okay, yeah I'm not weird. At all. I just, I really like James and Avery. They make me so happy. The whole best friend thing is fun. I liked the locker room talk about wes and girls and fred hating women. Great chapter. Can't wait for the party in the common room.

Author's Response: I love Quidditch too! It's so much fun to center things around. I think I would like to play it, but if i couldn't I would definitely be involved in it. So glad you enjoyed the chapter! It was a great one to write and I think you'll enjoy the next as well :) Thanks for the review!

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