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12 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Toujours Padfoot 

1st January 2013:
I think I just died. I have tears in my eyes. Surely this is the most poetic thing that hath ever been written.

WIZARD FEUD. Merlin's "for the love of me" and "my beard", "my toenails". The orbs, the switching partners, the confusion of exactly what year this was; Helga changing her name to Tiffany for absolutely no reason. I CAN'T. I'M SO CAN'T THAT I'M IN PAST TENSE NOW. I COULDN'T.

"No ding-ding vithout the vedding ring!" shrieked Broomhilde, who was very Catholic and did not believe in premarital snogging.

I'm dead.

This whole chapter was brilliant. It's so hard pulling out quotes without wanting to quote everything - Salazar throwing up gang signs, Godric giving a rude hand gesture (A/N: these cropping up in the middle of nowhere) that's offensive in seventeen countries, the aitch in urbs, Merlin's teeny robes, and the thing that made me completely lose it - THE ASTERISK OF DOOM. I'm imagining this enormous symbol crashing down upon them all. You've just murdered an entire fictional universe with one press of your key.

♥ So much win.

Author's Response: Author notes in the middle of chapters, or worse in the middle of sentences, is a huge pet peeve of mine ;) I have to admit, my favorite part of this is the breaking the fourth wall scene. lol Too much fun on this one. I'm so glad you liked it, thank you for reviewing!

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Review #2, by ChaosWednesday 

25th December 2012:
Heeey! It's Whiskey from the Holiday Review Swap!

I couldn't not click on the link and read this, there is no way I can pass by a gushing, over-the-top satire, especially one that reads like the screenplay to 'Top Secret!' if it had been written by Terry Pratchett! :D

So much here was absolute win!

Let's begin: First, I loved how the chapter started off with meta-commentary about the text itself. And I was thrilled to find that you came back to that style several times later in the text.

Next, your exaggeration of romance-novel ingredients (everybody with everybody drama, the Superfluous Mask Ball) were spot on and made for an actually coherent spoof of a genre instead of a random collection of random randomnesses that seem so popular (for the life of me I can't say why this is so...).

And, three's the charm, the way you tried to bring in actual Harry Potter moments was hillarious. I loved the spats between Godrick and Salazar and also: Merlin's beard! Thank you for the explanation, I had always wondered about why we grant such significance to his facial hair ;)
Bringing in the competition between Morgana Lefay and Merlin was also a nice pop-culture reference. It's not in the books, but many retellings of the King Arthur legends like to portray Morgana as an ambitious witch that wishes to outdo Merlin.

So much goodness in this story!
But, if you don't mind, I would like to offer my own two cents on possible improvement...

I mentioned above how I liked the coherency of themes and how this created for a satiric feel instead of inconsequential randomness. For me, that is a sign of quality and depth. Which is why I thought I would point out that, at times, you seemed to insert details just for the sake of them seeming unlikely without any other point. Examples would be the Whitness Protection, gangster Salazar (!!!), the, uh, Wizard Feud thing...these things seemed to come out of nowhere and remained thematically and visually unfitting and awkward,not contributing to poking fun at anything in a constructive way (excpet something one-dimentional like the thing they were referencing).Some character inconsistencies in Helga and Rowena were also irritating and faced the same problem. Basically, piling on references can get tedious if they don't follow some sort of pattern.

I realize that this fic is supposed to be just absurd, for the fun of it and nothing more, but even the most absurd works try to point out something. The idea is to take what we know and put it out of context. A story can break all the rules, but it must still be done consistently in order to be a story and not just a body of text. Almost all of the moments where you tried to bring in modern elements (except the Remus/Sirius fangirl,that was a complete win!) fell into the trap of being inconsequential randomness, which can be irritating instead of funny, because these things are never random and, ironically, serve to make the story more transparent and predictable...

I hope I could make myself clear and did not come off as critical! I enjoyed reading this very much and, as far as humour goes, it's one of the best things i've come accross on hpff for some time ;) I actually bothered to point out such subtle thing in the first place only becasue your story is basically killing it already and needs only a few tweaks to be amazing!
I hope you will look into my advice and find something helpful there!
Cheers!

Author's Response: Ah well, this isn't the usual satire. This is sort of one big in-joke for the validator squad. Everything in here, no matter how random and pointless it may seem, is mocking things we see in the queue. Inconsequential randomness is sort of the point. This chapter and the next got into a bit more of what I thought was getting mean-spirited rather than affectionate ribbing, so that's why I left it as is. I don't want to be mean-spirited in my mockery, kwim? Once it started going that way, it was time to stop.

Character inconsistencies are actually one of the things I'm mocking by having it with the Founders. Characters love to switch personalities in the queue, for some reason.

Well, I'm very glad you enjoyed it, even if you felt it lacked quality and depth. I think it's pointless silliness and wasn't actually aiming at depth, so I suppose that's all right. The purpose here was mostly to make the other staffers laugh, and hopefully others as well. :) Thank you for reviewing, and merry Christmas!



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Review #3, by ValWitch21 

21st December 2012:
"My middle name is Moonstone-Starbright-Broomhilde-Angela-Darling."

^ Of course it would be.

What I adore with this fic is the fact that you've injected so many cliches into it, when it takes place during the Founder's era.

Salazar, Rowena, Helga and Godric sound like a bunch of hormone-controlled teenagers, and its just hilarious. Having read The Unsinkable Molly Prewett, I've also got to comment at your variety of writing skills - both styles are perfectly mastered, and I have nothng to say.

Except that I'm very glad there's another chapter of this afterwards :)

(Also, Merlin made me crack up. "My beard!" "My toenails!" "for the love of me", hahaha. I'm guilty of this.)

(And the character-reality interaction was funny too - site rules and ToS!)

Author's Response: Well naturally that's her middle name! It probably could've been longer, but that's a decent length Archive Full Name ;)

They are all silly teenagers, doing everything that mildly irritates me in the queue. lol. I had way too much fun writing this story. The bit about the characters questioning the site rules is probably my favorite part. And Salazar throwing up gang signs. The Merlin thing, ah that's a huge pet peeve of mine, I had to write something silly to illustrate it. His mini-dress makes it even better.

Thank you for the lovely review and compliments on my writing, I really appreciate it!


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Review #4, by The Arethusa Got Lucky 

2nd July 2010:
If the mark of good comedy is that your readers are completely shell-shocked after, this is excellent comedy. This, like the chapter before, is so silly I'm finding it hard to believe it actually exists. More so in the second half than the first. I'm still highly amused.

As for the business with the H, I actually hear Eddie Izzard's voice in my head as I read it.

Now on to the third chapter, which I fear greatly. If I am turned into a gibbering wreck by the end, I want to take this moment to say that this story is freaking hilarious.

Author's Response: I do love that part of "Dress to Kill". Because there's an H in it. Ahem. Anyway, Eddie's brilliance aside, the management is not responsible for any psychological damage you may incur in the course of reading this parody. We disavow all knowledge of liability.

I'm glad to have amused you! This was a lot of fun to write, in all seriousness. I especially loved the Wizard Feud scene. Thank you for reviewing!


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Review #5, by slg 

2nd May 2010:
Before you do it, you must go through it! Or else I blew it...

I love that movie...

Author's Response: I do too! Thanks for reviewing :)

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Review #6, by Hermione's Quill 

5th September 2009:
I was certainly not disappointed! An excellently written farce.

Author's Response: Thank you so much!

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Review #7, by RonsGirlFriday 

18th June 2009:
I loved the game show references and the American English/ English English contrast.

"'My beard!'"
"They all looked at his beard."
--This made me laugh so hard, I have no idea why.

"My middle name is Moonstone-Starbright-Broomhilde-Angela-Darling."
--O lord. I feel bad laughing, because that actually happens. :-)


My hands-down favorite moment in this chapter:

"Where's the author, anyway?"
"She's down there on the ground, curled in a foetal position"

That, all the way through to the asterisk at the end of the scene. It was brilliant and hilarious. OMG.

Author's Response: hehehe. Yay! I really had fun writing this chapter. Heck all the chapters in this. Maybe too much fun. Thanks for reviewing!

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Review #8, by Alopex 

26th April 2009:
*HOOTS and wipes eyes* Oh man. When I read the first chapter of this when it was first put up, I was completely astonished, momentarily taken aback, and utterly amused. I thought the second chapter wouldn't be able to duplicate the effect, and I was about a quarter right. I was expecting this style, so it wasn't as astonishing, but there were a lot of astonishing things, and it was just as hilarious as the first chapter. Possibly even more hilarious. I would love to list what all I found most funny, but I'd probably end up quoting most of your own story back at you. I just can't decide what is the funniest, it was all so funny.

Author's Response: Woohoo! This one was fun. It really started with the Wheel of Plot Devices bit, and then snowballed until it became a new chapter lol. I'm glad you liked it, or at least thought it was funny ;) Thanks for reviewing!

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Review #9, by Girldetective85 

13th April 2009:
Haha!! I'm so glad we managed to peer pressure you into writing another chapter :D This was just as hilarious as the first, if not more so. The perfect amount of satire, sarcasm, and sheer ridiculousness (is that a word?). I thought the scene where the characters were looking out of the screen, wondering what had happened to you, was absolutely priceless. You should just let these guys write themselves. I hope you'll add in a shopping trip scene (or should I say a "filler chapter," is that what the kids are calling it nowadays?). And thank you for adding Broomhilde's quote for me!! LOL I love her. And I love her horse ... I can't remember what its name is. Freifenkrugel?

10/10

Author's Response: Farfegnugen? Farfetkrugal? It's hard to understand her when she whispers it. Unfortunately IMDb doesn't have casting info for the horse ;) I might add on to this later as more ideas come to me for things I want to make fun of. I have a few thoughts but not enough for a chapter. Maybe I'll throw in some filler shopping trips lol. Thanks for reviewing! I'm glad you liked it.

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Review #10, by SiriuslyPeeved 

9th April 2009:
The Men in Tights reference had me rolling as well. The history geek in me just loved the paragraph about what language the founders should be speaking: great parody! thanks for the laughs!

Author's Response: Thank you for reviewing, I'm glad you liked it!

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Review #11, by madelgranger 

7th April 2009:
haha this is hilarious! as has been previously noted, we are so grateful that the story turned out not to be a one-shot after all. i quite liked the authors notes and rowena's linguistics speech. thanks for writing!

Author's Response: Woohoo! Thank you so much!

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Review #12, by Georgia Weasley 

7th April 2009:
For me? I'm speechless! Really, I laughed until I can't breathe! I knew that the "no ding-ding" came from Men in Tights! I LOVE that movie! Mostly, I loved the American Godric throwing gang signs and the debate he threw poor Rowena into over what they actually should be speaking. I know, however, that this brilliant parody of all the joys of the queue will be lost on those we most want to 'get it'. Tiffany/Helga cracked me up. I will be saving this for when I need a good laugh. This was sheer brilliance! Have I mentioned how wonderful it is to have you back?~GW

Author's Response: lol! Thanks babe. I might add on to this if any more ideas occur to me to poke fun at. The gang signs gave me great joy, I must admit. Thanks for reviewing! -M

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