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23 Reviews Found

Review #1, by girly1393 

10th May 2011:
The innocence of sneaking into a girl's room... Well, in comparison to the horrors, I suppose, haha.

It seems so wistfully perfect, it's a shame to know it's going to be shattered.

Bravo to you.

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Review #2, by AnnaKay 

22nd March 2010:
Aww! James has to sneak out to go see Lily. That's so hilarious and so like James and while I think about it, Lily too. And Lily not complaining about the job and how he turned it down was great. I think it just showed how much she loves him, and is willing to support him with whatever he does. It made me giggle and some of the time the comments made me want to aww and say how cute. I think you wrote James and Lily really well together.

Well I know they get into the Order. I just can't wait to see how you do it and how it all happens

Author's Response: Ah, it is easy to forget that they were really just teenagers, just like any other teenager. And sneaking out is a teenager thing, no? :)

For some reason, to have Lily complain about James's choice never even crossed my mind. But I do think she would be supportive of whatever he wants - she seems to be fairly headstrong herself, and the type that's willing to try anything. I think she could understand his choice, and his disappointment.

LOL I tried to make this chapter sort of fluffy, but not overly so. I'm glad you laughed at times - and thanks for the compliment, I have a tough time with romance scenes and its nice to hear it came out well. I always worry about being too cheesy...


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Review #3, by onestop_hpfan18 

11th March 2010:
And I'm back to review ch. 3! I absolutely adored this chapter, namely for the James and Lily interaction in it; they're so perfect together and you did a great job writing them without it seeming too over the top fluffy. It was such a nice break from the darkness gloom that the war is causing to read about the young couple. Basically, what I'm saying is so far I am enjoying this as it's definitely apart of the few great Marauders fics that I've read with it's originality and how it follows canon so well, even with what little we know of the Marauders and Lily. Great job so far! 10/10

Author's Response: Ah, this was my first time EVER writing James/Lily. I was terrified of doing exactly what you said - making it too fluffy, or too cheesy, or too cliched. I am still unsure of whether I like the chapter or not, but I think, looking back at it, that its about the best that I am capable of doing. I wanted to introduce them and the relationship somewhat gently rather than just jump right in... it IS still only the beginning of this story, after all.

I'm glad you enjoyed the break from some of the gloominess. And I'm quite flattered to hear that this story is not like the other Marauder fics. Of course, I've strived all along to make it different - canon, for one, not OC centric for two, and based on the actual war for three. But it is nice to hear that others think that I have accomplished that :)

Thank you so much for taking the time to read and review these chapters... I know it looks to have quite enough reviews on it already, but it's always nice to hear an opinion, especially when it seems like its been a while since anyone left one :)


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Review #4, by spangles 

13th February 2010:
James reassurance about Peter makes me sad. :( This story is so dark, I've never read anything like it. I don't really know how to describe it, but it seems mature, more thoughtful. I know I mentioned maturity in the last review but I can't help but mention it again. I really like this story. 10/10

Author's Response: I've been trying to make the story dark, although I think sometimes I fail at that - or don't do it enough. I need more mentions of the outside world. Anyway, glad you are enjoying it :D

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Review #5, by gred_and_forge09 

11th February 2010:
Yay! I'm getting through this as quickly as I can :).

As usual, the characterisations are spot on - Sirius provides just enough humour to balance it with the darkness that surrounds them all without it being the most important thing in the story.

And more Lily! I suppose I've read so many fanfics that say she's "the most stunningly gorgeous girl, EVER!" that I've never even considered a normal-looking Lily. It took me aback a bit, but I liked it. It makes James seem like less of an arrogant sod that he didn't take Sirius's "advice" with the other girls lol. Aww, James is hilarious though, being so overprotective with Lily - that interaction was, as usual, excellently written.

I'm already worried that they seem to be dismissing Peter already as someone who just wants to be included. That's bound to go wrong (and it's not as though I have any knowledge of what will happen with Wormtail :) )

With regard to your review response, I might subtly steal your idea with Crouch and the Unforgivables for my own pieces (not that that would increase their dreadfully low quality, anyway - we can all dream, though)

Anyway, I'm running out of superlatives to use - stop writing so well!

Excellent piece, and I'm really getting to like it now!
gred_and_forge09

Author's Response: Hey Gred and Forge!

I don't know about Lily... She was head girl. She was smart. She despised James, much of it seeming to be just for his cocky attitude. Girls like her tend to have level heads on their shoulders, it seems. I mean its always possible that really pretty girls are like this too, but personally, I haven't seen it in my life. Girls like Lily, from my experience, tend to be more average (though no less great, or pretty, if you have an eye for it). Anyway, I'm glad you liked it! I've always been able to picture Lily and James as sort of a love/hate thing their whole lives, where we saw how Lily hated him in the pensieve with Harry, but I think there definitely could have been moments when they got along really well, too. They grow up together, after all. And she's the one girl he could never have!

You're right, the treatment of Peter is just asking for trouble. They take advantage of his presence, assume he'll be there, and don't really miss him when he's not, because when it's Sirius and James, they have each other anyway. But they certainly mean no harm by it, and probably don't even realise they do it, and definitely don't stop to think about what it would feel like.

You can't steal what isn't mine :) Go ahead and use the Crouch thing! JKR said he was the head Auror, and he was the one who allowed Unforgiveables! Good luck!

Thanks for continuing to come back and review! You truly made o' awesome.



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Review #6, by Awokened 

29th January 2010:
Ah... Each chapter is better than the other... A Great character depth!
And, to answer your question: Yes, I've written my first chapter, but I found it not really worth posing... Anyway, I edit it a bit and end up sending it. It's waiting for validation, but I'm completely not satisfied with it. Thanks for checking! And if you want, I'll tell you went it'll be validated.
Besides, I loved how this chapter ended ďAnd your enemies closer,Ē Sirius finished gravely", you kind of validate Sirius' and James' friendship, made it realistic =)
( Just one more thing : try avoiding adverbs "gravely" "firmly" "sarcastically" etc...)
10/10

Author's Response: I know what you mean about being unhappy with the chapter. I'm rarely happy with mine anymore, it seems. In this story, you'll find that the chapter quality might slowly begin to dwindle... lol. Maybe I'm just my worst critic. I was really proud of my first few, and now thirty chapters later, I just don't think I'm writing as well.

Of course, I think the first chapter has the advantage of being the most solid, considering it introduces characters and events and has a lot of description. So that's probably it, but still. I'm not as happy with most of my chapters :)

Also... Gah! Well, I'm afraid theres 30 chapters in which you will find adverbs! I haven't got the time to edit them now! lol. But can I ask why they are bad to use?


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Review #7, by Casey 

21st January 2010:
Lol at James and Lily sneaking around to see each other. They don't seem to 'fluffy' like how others portray them. I really do cringe at anything L/J just because they seem so overdone but here, they seem a little more human, a little less perfect, a little more realistic I guess you could say. You can clearly see that they have their faults in the writing which I like to see. Everything anyone has said about those two seem to be that they were utterly perfect in most of the things that they did (apart from what Severus said ). This sort of had the feeling of the calm before the storm when people prepare themselves for what is to come. I quite liked it.

Author's Response: LOL seems like its the thing to do, sneak out to see your boy/girlfriend. I try to make them seem more like a normal couple and not like a fluffy, perfect one, but since I don't feature their relationship much, I worry sometimes that they don't come off how I want them to in the short bits i do give them. But anyway, I'm really happy you can see their faults. Thanks for yet another fantastic review!

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Review #8, by whacked 

15th January 2010:
I really love how you've taken every little thing said about the marauders and lily into consideration. They feel real. I'm going to have to go back to my Marauder story and weep at its lack of coolness. because yes, it is a silly little love story :)

Barty Crouch Sr was very in character. I think that was important, because he's difficult to capture.

Very well done, dear.

10/10

Author's Response: I try really hard to include every detail from the books so that it stays canon, though I wouldn't be surprised if I missed some things. I'm pleased you find them real! And who says Marauder romances cant be cool? They dominate the review counts :)

Barty was fun to write. He was the head of the Auror Dpt. back then, so I wanted to include him! You get to see him a few more times in the future.


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Review #9, by amarief 

8th December 2009:
wonderful! it keeps good pace and length-thanks for something better than readable!

Author's Response: Nice, I am glad you're enjoying it so far. Sometimes I worry that it's a little too long, with 7k words on some chapters, but ah well. Lots to say :)

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Review #10, by InvisibleWitch19 

23rd September 2009:
This chapter was as amazing as the latest one! I'm glad Lily was shown more and that James would have to sneak off to be with her. They are really sweet and I could foresee the dangerous chapters to affect their love life ahead... LOL, I sound like Trelawney.

ANYWAY, I love how you portray James as the awesome fighting leader James in this story. The ending part of this chapter was excellent; I felt the emotions in the air. Haha.

Keep up the excellent work!

-Bree-

Author's Response: I am glad you liked this one, it was really hard for me to write. I find romance difficult, and I wanted a quiet, enjoyable moment to introduce Lily and I didn't know how to go about it. I was worried it would be overboard on the romance, and then worried that they wouldn't seem 'in love', but more like friends. I still don't know, but I'm glad you liked it. Sweet is a good word - if they are sweet, then I can be happy with that :)

I always thought James would be the leader. Lots of people have James and Sirius kind of equal in that position, but I don't know. I just see Sirius with all his family problems (which even still affect him 15 years later in Harry's time), and see the way he would get so worked up over some things in the books. I love him to death, but I don't think he is as strong as James. James had a great life and probably grew in ways that Sirius (or the other two, each with their respective issues as well) never could. So it just seems natural to me that he'd be the most confident (despite Sirius's haughtiness) and the most cut-out to be leader.

Plus I got the picture that all three of his friends rather adored him. I think he'd make a good leader just because they'd do anything he said.


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Review #11, by Dellacqua 

24th June 2009:
Hello again!

Your adherence to canon in the previous chapters has been unbelievable and exactly correct. I loved in the Second Chapter the job interviews and Jamesí immediate refusal to take a job where Unforgiveable curses were treated as acceptable in certain circumstances.

I think this really showed brilliantly the reasoning why James and Sirius didnít decide to go in to ministry work but joined the Order instead. It also shows a real similarity between Jamesí behaviour and that of Harry later on, a great reflection of morals and values which Harry holds dear in the HP books.

I think it also explained Dumbledoreís reluctance to hold much trust for the Ministry in the HP book era, obviously they acted just as inefficiently back when Voldemort first rose and, recognising the signs, Dumbledore knew which action had to be taken. You have a fantastic way of weaving in all the canon information we know with your own writing and it makes it so realistic and believable. Even down to Jamesí inviting Sirius to dinner because he knew his parents had missed him since her moved out a year previously. This is obviously mentioned I think in Half-Blood Prince but something which few people include in Marauder era fics Ė preferring to keep Sirius living with the Potterís for as long as possible.

Your description of the growing anticipation of Voldemort and what actions he will take next is excellent, in the Third chapter particularly the way your describe the almost solid air consumed my darkness is brilliant and not only made me able to clearly visualise it but also scared me to the bone!

The inclusion of James visiting Lily was a great idea, it was such a good opportunity to find out in more depth the ins and outs of their relationship. Not to mention the obvious and simple love between them is absolutely heartbreaking to read, considering what I know will happen to them eventually. I have to admit I am tearing up a bit! You so beautifully show this flicker of hope in their lives and this belief that something as pure and positive as love can still exist in the atmosphere of growing hostility and hate. Heartbreaking really is the only way to describe it.

The maturity and solidity in their conviction which you have given to, in particular, James and Lily is astounding ad the only explanation really why they could ever want to be involved in an organisation which fought directly against Voldemort. Jamesí determination is fantastic and the language you use really lets his love for Lily shine through strongly.

ďIt didnít take long for them to drift to sleep in each otherís arms, nestled beneath the innocent pink blankets of Lilyís childhood.Ē I thought that line was absolutely fantastic, really incredibly well written and providing such a sharp contrast against everything else that is happening with such a negative effect around them. It shows that despite their mature attitudes they are still young and not much older than children and shouldnít have to shoulder this responsibility.

So overall another two excellently written chapters, executed to perfection. Your grasp of the atmosphere and emotion that must have surrounded them all is brilliant and portrayed so well it really resonates with the reader. Iím only disappointed I canít give it more than 10/10. (sorry for an essay length review again - I'm out of control!!)

Author's Response: I've been trying to stay canon because in the end, I want a realistic story and not some off-the-wall tale of what might have happened. I have so much fun trying to include the little canon bits and have reactions and reasons or twists to them, and I'm really glad you've enjoyed that part.

I think it's great when people can see a similarity between James and Harry. James is much cooler, of course :) But we know little about his actual character, and I love hearing that people see Harry in him, because it's a bit of a confirmation on something we just don't know. I always see fics where Dumbledore approaches the Marauders and asks them to join, and I just don't agree with that - I can't see him asking children to give up a chance at careers and join the Order to fight and possibly die. I'm glad you liked the way they went into the Order, because I was particularly proud of it. I think this is the one thing that I have never seen done in any other story.

I really think Sirius craves a normal family life. I hate the fact that he bought his own flat. I wish he'd have stayed longer, but for now, I have him around the Potters and especially James as often as I possibly can. I think he's the sweet guy underneath his act that elderly people could just adore.

I want to try to include James/Lily as much as possible here, because I wanted this story to cover everything. I have a tough time with romance, so your compliments here mean so much to me. This is a chapter I often doubt. But you caught on to everything I was trying to show perfectly; they're trying so hard to still have normal lives and just be teenagers through all of this.

You don't have to apologise for the length of your reviews, I really relish the long ones :D I rarely get readers to see things as in depth as you do, and seriously, I think my face may split open from smiling too much now. I'm sorry I didn't address every point you left this time - last time I went over the character limit and had to edit, so I wanted to leave room to thank you :) I only hope the rest of the story lives up to these fantastic reviews - later chapters have gotten difficult to write, and I've actually been stressing out about needing to edit them.

And I'm going to read your story. I wanted to let you know. I totally owe you. I'm not very fast, nor as observant as you are, but it will come :)



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Review #12, by californialove 

7th June 2009:
I've only read three chapters so far, and I have to say, this story is amazing. Your are such a great writer! This story is just written so well, that it's just real to me. I can actually believe this to be like, a legit canon work, that Rowling wrote herself.

BALLIN!

Author's Response: Thanks so much for the fantastic review! I'm really glad you like it so far - and especially the canon/legit part, because that is what I want. I'm trying not to do anything too far out (though it's proving difficult when trying to think up scenes in a magical war...)

Thank you!


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Review #13, by Violet Gryfindor 

29th May 2009:
First off, I should apologize for not having continued this story in so long. Now that I've read another chapter, I feel horrible not having continued - it's written so well and makes the characters come alive in a wholly different way from other Marauder fiction. They're so normal, not the perfect examples of humanity that one usually finds. Lily is an average girl who's captivated James, and James is an overprotected teenager ready for adventure. Everything about this story is so natural - this is what more Marauder fics should be like, mixing the romantic and comedic antics with the dangers of living in a time of war.

In this chapter, I really like the inclusions in parenthesis and the other little details you include. They add to the story perfectly and don't break up the flow. Everything about this chapter is perfect, so there's really nothing else to say. :P Amazing work!

Author's Response: Oh no, if anyone, it is I who owes you an apology. After all, I started on your Eleanor Digby fic like a year ago, but ended up taking a FF break, and never picked it up again. Though I was actually thinking about it just the other day, so how ironic that here you are. I think my heart might have stopped for a split second when I saw two reviews from you :)

Thanks for the compliments - you've really just listed off a lot of the things that I strive for. I really want them to seem like normal teenagers, who sneak out of the house when they shouldn't and still joke around. When I started writing this I wanted to show a ton of different aspects in their lives just to make it seem realistic. (I'm going to have to go back and do a lot of fleshing out of minor things!) And I'm really trying hard to include a bit of everything - action, adventure, drama angst and romance. I'm really glad you pointed out how I've mixed different things in.

I've been trying to keep Lily average. Possibly to the point of trying TOO hard, but I haven't written a ton of her, so I don't think its overboard yet :D

Ah, the parenthesis. I picked up that habit a while back, and I keep trying not to overdo that as well, but it seems like I've always got one last little comment that I'd like to add in and the parenthesis suddenly seems like the best way to do it. I've been doubtful on whether or not people will enjoy it, but I'm glad you do, and its reassuring to hear it hasn't interrupted the flow (at least in this chapter.)


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Review #14, by Moonylupin 

28th May 2009:
James and Lily are so adorable. I can't find any other word. They're just really adorable together. I love how James sneaks into her house every night, even though Sirius caught him. I thought Sirius's reaction to hearing someone sneaking around was perfect. I actually have him doing something similiar in a later chapter of my fic (except someone Apparates right on top of him). The seriousness and playfulness of James and Lily was done really well. I feel so horrible for James that he had to stop pursuing his career as an Auror, but he has his principles, so that's even better. Good that he's going to contact Dumbledore about the Order. It was very reminiscent of Ron in HBP when Sirius asked if there was anyone they knew dead when James was reading the paper. I can't wait to read about them joining the Order. Great chapter!

Author's Response: Well, adorable is a good word :) I really have a hard time with romance, and while this wasn't exactly a romantic chapter, I was, at least, trying to show how well they get along. Basically I wanted them to appear really good for each other, through just an every day type of moment. So the fact that you say they're adorable together makes me really happy :)

Also, I'm glad you liked Sirius reaction. I figure (as outgoing and reckless as Sirius has always been made out to be) that there will always be a lot of paranoia in this era, especially as things progress and Voldemort reaches his peak in power. I'm glad to hear he does something similar in your fic - see, told you we should exchange ideas. I can't wait to get farther along in yours. In fact, reading yours is motivating me to want to get working on my Marauder fic (the Hogwarts years one) a little bit more. It's so fun to read about them as children. I was so proud of my Marauders Map chapter in my story on my Bibbs account. Do you remember that? I had it come alive by using some secret potion that was used when making moving portraits. And I think, if I ever get up to that point any time soon, i will do it again in the new version :)

I had forgotten about Ron asking about the paper in HBP. How odd. I just thought it would only be natural, they must have had nothing but bad news for several weeks by that time!!


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Review #15, by rachm34 

28th January 2009:
This was an even better chapter than the last. Perhaps, it was because you brought Lily into the story more. I really like how you had James sneak off to see her. Their relationship at this point seems very sweet, yet I can sense that the danger is only just starting to come.

I like how James is taking even more charge, I like how he's going to fight. I liked the opening and closing lines of this last paragraph the best. The last paragraph really sums up the chapter nicely.

You are doing a great job with the characterizations, I am wondering if we'll see a bit more Peter and Remus but i understand if we don't.

There was one place where you didn't start a new line when someone new spoke. Only one place. it was probably a little lazy mistake. i think you can catch it easily if you just skim through it. I think it was during the Lily and James part of this chapter.

Nice job as always.

Cheers!
Rachel

Author's Response: Ah, everyone loves Lily! Yes, their relationship is fairly sweet and innocent - I don't very much enjoy the stories where they're sleeping around and hanging off each other at Hogwarts.

I definitely see James as the leader of the group. I'm always confused when people have it be Sirius, because, as much as I love him, I think he's a little weaker than James because of his background. James is very eager to fight and be a hero :)

And as you know, you'll definitely be seeing some Remus and Peter :)

I'll check out this chapter for the line you are talking about as well. I think the problem is my cheap word processor. It does all sorts of strange things like that (when I copy/paste to HPFF, it never copies my exclamation marks, for instance, and I have to go through and insert them all again!)

I appreciate you pointing those things out, because I don't always catch them! Thank you!


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Review #16, by spaghettiemandolino 

21st January 2009:
You made me laugh with hhis line:James would allow him to carry on a bit, because he loved hearing how long that list really was. That's so james!
I loved Sirius' worry, it was well written. Lily and James scene was simple and I loved the reality of it. Their conversation, worry, hope and joy were really natural.

Author's Response: I love James so much :) I'm glad I'm still in the early parts of this story, because it is going to break my part to write the end. I hate writing things that happened AFTER he died, because I miss his presence in the stories!

I'm glad you liked Lily and James's conversation. I have a bit of a struggle with romance, so that is reassuring. Not that anything really romantic actually happened.


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Review #17, by Labby 

4th November 2008:
Yay, I love James and Lily's relationship, and I love how you write it. Then scene of them looking through the pictures together was really nice.. it just shows how times have changed though, even James noticing his more youthful/joyful expressions. I love how you show that the times are changing with Voldemort taking over, with the photo scene, as well as the newspapers and James trying to join the Order of course. Great chapter!

Author's Response: Thanks! That's actually my favorite scene too. I wanted to write more about it but I resisted. I didn't want a ton of flashback scenes! I'm glad you're picking up on the changing times, I've been trying to make things dark and scary to the point where nobody even wants to go out and do anything.

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Review #18, by Romina Stephanie 

2nd November 2008:
Heh, I think you did a good job with the romance. Not cheesy in any way. It was a nice moment. And I was right: my fondness for them is only growing. I must really compliment you on the characterizations; as I might have mentioned, they're realistic - they're human. I'm already looking forward to the next chapter and this story is going into my favourites. Keep up the good work!

Author's Response: LOL. Romance is so hard for me. I think I accomplished what I wanted with this chapter... which was to show that the relationship is definitely there, but this night isn't all love and kissing and romance. Their relationship is real and they talk about lots of things.

Thanks so much for the characterization compliments - I really write only because I love the characters so much and feel we didn't get enough of them. Thus, I write only Marauders! lol.


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Review #19, by shadowycorner 

29th October 2008:
But it was such a nice James/Lily moment there in the bedroom. i loved how you described the bedroom and their interaction. it didn't have to be anything special, because it was, for them, this ordinary night when they can just talk and be with each other. Nothing significant has to happen. The nature of them was captured just enough and it was nice to read about. i laughed out loud when Lily exclaimed that James wants to be a teacher. What a surprise that would be, indeed.

Sirius's watching was so in-character for him, just as his grumbling at James for his midnight trips to Lily. It's sad that the war with Voldemort is stopping them from living a normal life. That's the price the legends have to pay probably. Loving the story very, very much and looking forward to the next chapter. :)

~Liz

Author's Response: OO! I'm glad you liked the description. I was actually worried about it as I wrote it. "Show, not tell" kept running through my head as I wrote that, and I knew I wasn't showing haha. I was just rambling off what the room looked like... It is fun to write about insignificant parts of their lives. Just a simple conversation... it helps show who they are and how their relationship is! This is definitely a chapter some would call "filler" but I think it belongs here :)

It's hard to find a balance for Sirius.. he was always portrayed by JKR as loving danger... but at the same time... how can he watch his best friend (and all he has, really) walk out the door knowing he could be killed in an instant? I had to make him worry :) And I'm glad you're seeing the sacrifices everyone had to make for safety. It's small things like that that kind of build on how scary a time it was.


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Review #20, by Whimsical Diva 

29th October 2008:
I just wanted to tell you that I really like this story. I think you've captured the friendship and love which formed the fabric of Marauders' lives beautifully. And thank God Sirius does not have a girlfriend in this story; personally, I'm inclined to believe that neither Sirius nor Lupin had a girlfriend during the time of the first war. I clearly remember reading an interview of JKR where she said that Sirius did not have the 'time' to fall in love with a woman, and thus Harry had no godmother.

I particularly liked the portrayal of Sirius. Generally, fanfic writers take Sirius a bit too seriously and they tend to forget that he was only a teenager at that time; in most fanfics, Sirius is more mature than he would have been in canon. I think Sirius in this fic is confident, loyal but not entirely self-assured, and that works very well for the story.

All in all, this is a wonderful story. I look forward to reading more. :)

Author's Response: Hi! Thank you so much for the compliments, because a lot of the things you said are exactly the things I go for. I really wanted to write just a "marauder" story about the war. So their friendship is definitely important in this story! And no way, no OC girlfriends or anything. I believe that if they had girlfriends or anyone special in their lives aside from each other, they'd have mentioned it at some point to Harry.

I'm surprised at what you say about Sirius! Because in the fanfics I see, Sirius is completely the opposite of what you've seen! He's immature, always joking, never taking anything seriously. He's an unfeeling shallow clown, and I hate that he's portrayed like that. Now i'm actually interested in seeing some of the fanfics YOU'VE seen,because I rarely see a serious sirius! But I love Sirius to death. After all that he's been through with his family, and rejection, I definitely think he would have some insecurities underneath. I think he'd be a dreamer more than anything. I could always see Sirius staring off into space ^.^

Thank you for the great review, it was a lot of fun to respond to.


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Review #21, by the__5th__marauder 

29th October 2008:
And they don't know that their number one enemy that betraying little weasel is following them around ready to save his own arse and sacrifice his mates at the same time.

Sorry...I always get annoyed at the fact that Peter was part of the Order AND that he betrayed Lily and James, AND put Sirius in Azkaban AND left Remus with no friends AND Harry with no parents (well i mean his betrayal lead to all that stuff).

Anyways great work, I pretty sure that this was one of my favourite chapters cos it had the bits showing James and Sirius' friendship.. and started to develop Lily and James' relationship.

And poor James didn't even know Lily's friend Lucy from Ravenclaw, did he talk to any other girls besides Lily? lol.

Author's Response: lol! I know. It's so frustrating, isn't it? ^.^ But I think I'm going to try to make Peter somebody that a lot of people can relate to. I want to give him good reasons for doing what he did (good reasons in his opinion, at least) and maybe people can understand why, though they'll still hate him for it (lol I sure do.)

Haha. I'm sure he knew who she was, I was thinking along the lines of... he talked to SO MANY girls... he had no idea who "lucy" was!


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Review #22, by auror_snape 

28th October 2008:
And I still believe Lily guessed about Snape early on, and that's why she kept him close. She, like James, knew the greasy excuse for a human being was an enemy and wanted to keep a close eye on him. James just took his distrust further and actually tried to do something about it.

Anyway, fantastic chapter, and I like how James and Lily have intelligent conversations even in such an intimate location as her bedroom in the early hours of the morning. They're not spening their time trying to make Harry before they're even married.

Author's Response: hmm... well she did know about him and his death eaters, as she confronted him about it in school! So maybe! I just had her keep his picture because at one time, he was a very dear friend to her.

And I'm glad you like that about James and lily, because I really don't intend it to be all about sex and each other. I want their relationship to grow!


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Review #23, by SunnyRae 

28th October 2008:
Oh! I think you did a wonderful job with James and Lily! It was very sweet!! Good job! XD
I think my favorite part is Sirius and James always understanding one another so well... like they're two of the same ^.^
patiently waiting for more!
Sunny

Author's Response: yay! thank you for saying that! I have such a hard time with romance, and with these two I want things to be casual and not all about love all the time! at least for now!

I love James and Sirius :) imo, they ARE two of the same!


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