7 Reviews Found

Review #1, by randomnickname 

27th September 2015:
Hello there, first time I'm commenting on your very nice fic.
Since it has this first person diary/ epistolary novel format, it is quite slow paced without ever being dull, thanks to the great care you put into details and character development.
It's not the most catchy fic I've ever read, but it's well conceived, thought through and is an overall pleasant read.
I like your unusual setting, the idea of this workhouse where different outcasts of the magical society live (it's a quite political fic, I always love critics of the system of the magical world). I like that despite having her dark ascendency and family secrets, Cerrydwin is a normal person who craves a normal life. It's annoying when people try desperately to make their characters more interesting by adding weird personality traits or passions; a rather normal, although enjoyably stubborn person, living interesting things is enough to interest the reader. And she doesn't feel shallow or anything; it's good.
I like lupin (who doesn't like Lupin), much Lupin = much good. Puts a believable and interesting light on his life.
I like how well your story fits into the constellation of people we know of the HP canon. I like Hagrids letters and their simple, heartly style.

As I said, this story is not the most addictive I've read, but is, in some way, very complete and coherente, two features I do really enjoy.
That's good work and I'm looking forward to read the rest

(p.s. I'm sorry not to comment on single chapters, but I find it difficult to judge the pieces without having seen the complete puzzle ;) )

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Review #2, by knicoles 

26th July 2013:
Awww, man, I had kinda hoped it would have escalated into a pranking war between Charlie and Kerri and Tonks. Oh well. It's fun to see them playing house together of sorts when they invited the Weasleys out to her cottage.

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Review #3, by Shellee 

22nd May 2008:
I actually think about it myself what Snape does at Christmas all the time, does he ever leave the castle? Is he maybe too embarrased to tell her that? Hm, well. Heheh, see, Charlie found out. They got them, still, he believed it was from Molly, but it's good that it's in the open now and there's not problem.
Aw, she shouldn't feel guilty for something like that, it's not her fault at all. Hehehe, the slugs did their work then. Ha, he deserved it! Ryann is a nice one. I love the description of taking blood from your girlfriend is romantic and intimate. That dinner night went well too, it seems. She's liking Remus more, whoo!

Author's Response: I don't know...Snape is probably too sure of his own perfection to be ashamed to tell her anything. Most of the things he keeps from her, he does because he's not the most trusting of souls. He and Kerri are getting along but still trying to get used to each other.

Kerri's problem is that she totally over analyzes things....she needs to get over it because of what's coming in the next few years. Sometimes you do have to take the law into your own hands.

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Review #4, by ButterflyRogue 

1st May 2008:
I enjoyed this chapter very, VERY much!

"Not knowing exactly when evil Professor Snape might turn up keeps them on their toes." ---> this got me laughing out loud. A very Snape-like thing to say... :)
"One word of caution in regard to your flesh eating slug project --- DO NOT GET CAUGHT!"

Speaking of the slugs... Gargantua definitely got what he deserved, no doubt in that... :D:D:D

And Kerri is definitely something else. No wonder Remus is falling for her. --- "I wish I was flat chested like that -- it would make shooting a crossbow easier." lol
I also like the introduction of Ryann. She seems to have a very interesting personality. I've read about your worries regarding her in your thread on EHPF, but I really think you have nothing to worry about. Her sexuality is very subtly introduced and only gives more depth to the story with actually introducing a member of a society there are prejudices against in the real world. Besides, I'm not really a fan of slash myself, but I have nothing against it. True, I consider myself rather open-minded, but I don't think there should be negative comments regarding her. But in case there are some, none of them should get to you. (I do know I'm late with my review and that most of your readers have already reviewed this chapter, but I had to mention this...)

"He’d think I was evil…and maybe I am…and I want Remus to think well of me." --- I like how Kerri is still not realizing she's completely in-love with Remus. *sigh* I think we're all a bit in-love with Remus one way or the other... He really is perfect personality-wise.

And Mr. Weasley is just so adorable... I can totally see him working on that car with such dedication... And it's nice to know a thing or two about the Ford Anglia before its adventure in CoS. :)

Take care!

Author's Response: Thank you for such a nice review. I think that pretty much sums up anything else I could possibly have said. I especially appreciate your opinion on Ryann.

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Review #5, by morgana67 

25th April 2008:
Ah, it's happened again! I left a reasonably long review that now doesn't show. Damn!

Ok, I'll do it again. I really enjoyed this chapter. It has some very funny moments, including a typo that turned out a bit like my Merlin's bear(d). This happened when you said that someone was over 200 (y)ears old. It got my laughing hard!

I notice that you're getting rather cheeky with with certain insinuations, like what happened to Goyle.

It's interesting to see that Kerri is now worrying about becoming like her father but that she knows deep down that she is a better person. Sevvy was very funny when he talks about himself as "evil Professor Snape", wonderful.

I like your vampire too. I know what you were talking about in your pm now. The only thing I thought it may have been a bit odd is that she's flirting with Kerri from the very first moment they meet, although maybe this is in this character's nature. I found very original how you explain that vampires don't convert others just by taking a little blood, that you have to take quite a bit.

Ah, and people are beginning to realise that there maybe something, if platonic at this stage, between Remus and Kerri.

Very nice chapter again!

Author's Response: You're the only one that ever complains to me about reviews disappearing. Either no one mentions it or the system just doesn't like you. You're not having much luck with computers lately, are you?

You're the only person to comment on the sly little innuendo related to Goyle. There are some coming in a later chapter -- the trip to Diagon Alley where the guys start comparing wand sizes. I think I might want to question staff before I post it just to be sure that I won't get in trouble for it. I'd like to keep my 15 + rating if at all possible.

I'll have to figure out where that typo is...thanks for mentioning it.

That's just Ryann's personality. I don't think she even thinks of herself as flirting...she's just being herself. She's kind of a romantic, she thinks there should be someone for everyone and that's why she's noticed the thing with Remus and Kerri. Later on she's kind of a busybody and talks Kerri into flirting with Remus.

For the vampire parts I'm actually a bit nervous because I'm not 100% clear on where the canon stands. I don't think there's too much mentioned about vampires and their lifestyles so I think I'm free to be creative with it....I hope.

Thank you for your review. Nice to have you back.

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Review #6, by Bella_Portia 

20th April 2008:
First, I think you did a wonderful job with those flesh-eating slugs. And the poor slugs, who spent all that time sitting in a lingerie drawer or hanging around transfigured into a bracelet, finally received the abundant meal they had so long needed. And, let's face it, Goyle probably lost a little weight that he needed to lose as a result of his contact with the slugs, so, in the grand scheme of things, Kerri may have done him a favor. At the very least, Goyle may have some time to contemplate his own mortality as he lies in his hospital bed. I realize he can't contemplate very much without making his brain hurt; but every little bit helps, especially if he's going back to work some day.

I continue to love your characters. Ryann is another wonderful addition. I hope we haven't seen the last of her, even though Kerri will be leaving the factory.

I thoroughly enjoyed the letter from Severus. I feel very dumb but -- I did not get the reference to an enchanted mop. All I could think of was the movie Fantasia. When he tells her to not get caught on her "project," I thought that was hilarious, a true brother/sister moment.

As always, I look forward to more.

Author's Response: Thank you for saying that about Ryann. I've been through a lot of worry over her -- there's a long commentary on it in my members forum at elderlies. I really went back and forth over whether or not to include her because I was afraid people would find her controvercial. You're the first person to comment on her and I'm glad you like her. She'll show up again later....she's kind of a meddler.

I'm glad you liked the flesh eating slugs. I was afraid people exected a mayhem filled scene like I usually put in my Marauder stories, but it simply wasn't practical in this case. I can't get over how much people really seem to hate Goyle....people have really been looking forward to seeing him get what he deserves.

The mop --- one of his students (he doesn't know who) has been enchanting mops and putting them outside his door so they mop back in and forth in the entry way. Just a stupid, harmless prank, but I think it bugs him more than he lets on. I believe it started earlier in the year and he mentioned it....but I'm not sure. This thing has gotten so long and detailed that it's even hard for me to keep up.

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Review #7, by Bella 15 

15th April 2008:
lol finally the flesh eating slugs... hahaahaha i dont feel bad for him well maybe slightly if he were a real person and not a fictional charetor. keep writing i cant wait for the next chapter.

Author's Response: I don't think anyone feels bad for him -- not even Remus -- but he's a nice guy so he won't say that. SO many readers have been looking forward to seeing this guy get what he deserves.

The next chapter just needs cleaning up. I'm planning to post some time on Thursday.

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