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52 Reviews Found

Review #1, by SeverusLove 

28th September 2011:
The picture in the beginning almost made me cry. I don't know why. It looked so beautiful yet sad and nostalgic. This is a really interesting story, I like it. :))

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Review #2, by Bauhinia 

17th August 2011:
Aww Anna is so sweet! Alexander doesn't seem all that nice though...
Great chapter :)

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Review #3, by hermione_fan 

25th July 2011:
I am very much enjoying your story. I love the flow of your writing.

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Review #4, by SaphireSmiles 

24th November 2010:
Tsk tsk tsk. Alexander is a pain. That's very unfortunate.
Mrs. Clearly seems like a lovely lady - but, question - is she a "mrs"? Do we meet her husband?

Your writing is fabulous. :)

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Review #5, by AnonymousAntonymous 

15th August 2010:
Ooh xD Alexander, the little taddler =3

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Review #6, by NotSuchAPrincessAlex 

20th April 2010:
nice job, really well done

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Review #7, by Temple Deer 

13th October 2009:
You have placed the background information in just exactly the right place in the story. The only thing I would do is remove the parenthesis after Mrs. Stewart refers to "Pricilla", we know both Nyah's names now; the parenthesis reminds us there is an author!

I would like to see a little more tension when Nyah is leaving the house for the party. It's too easy, although, obviously, it will get complicated later. Darned brothers!

I don't know about "blimey", but maybe it's simply the clash of that kind of in-your-face British expression and the American spelling!

I am enjoying this very much. Your strength is your realistic portrayal of the children and what goes on in their heads, juxtaposed by the weird behaviour of the mother. How Rowling of you!

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Review #8, by poprockzwitch_14 

30th April 2009:
just something little, but if anna and nyah are living in the same house, wouldn't they think they're sisters? in that case, i don't know if anna would say 'what are friends for' but rather i think she would play up the blood bond. 'what are sisters for' i'm really enjoying the story so far though, i like the storyline.

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Review #9, by Jenna 

16th November 2008:
oooh, Shes a sneaky little one. Can't wait to find out what happends with Alexander!

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Review #10, by Mandy 

28th October 2008:
I am loving this story. Stupid Alexander =( !

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Review #11, by Pookha 

15th October 2008:
'Anna smiled and simply said, “What are friends for?” '--This line is quite telling in that she didn't ask, "What are sisters for?" instead. It implies to me that Anna knows more than she lets on.

I thought you would like to know that 'Mrs. Cleary' is misspelled in the very first line of this chapter as 'Mrs. Clearly'-I know you hate typos in your own writing as much as I do.

This clearly shows Nyah's mischievous side. Your characterisation of a little girl is really good. You show the sibling rivalry well, as well as sisterly love.

Yet again, I can feel the sub-theme of how children with differences are treated badly by others, often their own parents.

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Review #12, by merlins_pants 

9th October 2008:
Aw that was so cute of Anna and Mrs. Cleary to help her get to the party! But what a little sneak Alexander is! But I'm sorry I can't leave a long review but I'm too excited to get to the next chapter, which I guess is a good thing! I'll review extra long when I get through a couple more. :)

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Review #13, by Mistress 

8th October 2008:
Wow, I think I'm addicted to this story haha. I'm glad you suggested it over at eHPf!

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Review #14, by xXmalfoysgirl4everXx 

9th June 2008:
Another amazing chapter. I love Nyah, and I feel as if she is real and I'm following her in her story. I really like the small signs of magic happening too, it's very creative. This character is very well portrayed, and I can't wait to hear her secret! 10/10

Author's Response:

Hello again! :D

I'm so glad you enjoyed this chapter! Nyah is a great character and I'm thrilled that she feels 'real' to you as well!

Thank you for another lovely review! :D


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Review #15, by TantheCan 

8th June 2008:
Oh boy oh boy oh boy!

Good for Nyah! Taking things into her own hands. I love how you write Anna and Nyah's relationship. It's really refreshing. I was kind of hoping that she would have a nice relationship with her brother as well, but he's turned out to be a nasty little thing huh?

I'm actually terrified to find out what kind of trouble Nyah will get into with Mother.

I think its fabulous that you're able to elicit such emotion from your writing; its a talent that I would like to hone myself!

Once again, an amazing job!

Author's Response:

Hi! :D

Nyah has a bit of a sneaky streak in her, doesn't she? (hmm... I wonder where that comes from...) lol

Her relationship with Anna is very important to them both. Nyah needs someone to confide in and look up to, and Anna needs someone to love on and help out - so it works for both of them! :D

Thank you for the compliments. I really do appreciate your thoughts on the chapters! :D Thanks for another great review!


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Review #16, by Leo072491 

27th May 2008:
This chapter was really sweet. The little flashback in the middle was a great addition. It was kind of a flashback and foreshadow at the same time. The character development is getting much better. I'm still just curious about why you have the father characterized the way you do. And why if the mother doesn't like her then why did she take her in when she was dropped off. Other than that great story! This is the last chapter for reviewing. If you want me to review the rest the resubmit it in my thread with just the link and I'll add it to the que. I just have to make sure I take care of everyone :). Great story and if this really is my last review then I wish you all the best of luck!

~Leo

Author's Response:

Hi Leo! :)

Thanks again for stopping by! I really enjoy your reviews!

Again, the reasoning behind 'Mother' and 'Father' acting odd is explained - but it's a few more chapters away... ch 7.

I completely understand not doing every chapter - I don't mind a bit. I will definitely be back and hopefully things will be a bit clearer as you go on. :D

Thanks again - I love the balance of CC and compliments! Perfect!


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Review #17, by marinahill 

23rd May 2008:
that was a very informative chapter!

so she did end up going to the party! I wonder what will happen next...

i loved the relationship you've built between anna and nyah. its very realistic, and it makes sense because it shows how she has coped with living in that house. I also adore Mrs Cleary - she's a dear! its such an interesting concept - Catherine trying to control every aspect of her household whilst those beneath her strive to rebel.

i think i've said all i have to say... your descriptions are extremely good, always in the right place without going overboard, and your characterisation seems to come so naturally, which makes it an enjoyable read :)

10/10 and its going into my favourites. normally this would be the end of my reviewing, but im afraid you're not going to get rid of me that easily!

Author's Response:

Hello again! :)

Yes, she got to the party and had a wonderful time with her friends... but for a price...

Rebellion is a common thread with dictatorship... and the rebels usually win!

I'm very glad you're enjoying it and I do hope you'll continue reading! :D


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Review #18, by Ariana_Gryffindor 

22nd May 2008:
Hi me again

i liked the fact that Anna and Mr cleary helped her. This was an interesting chapter because i showed nyah's own thoughts on the slip about being dropped off. it males me thing whetehr her "mother" actually knows that magic is real but doesn't want to hear of it so pretends it isn't.

I feel really bad for nyah when she said to anna that she ahd enver been to a party especially not an overnight one. Also when she told herself she didn't mind about not getting a big party like her borther and sister. it makes me think that in ways she has been somewhat deprived from a normal childhood and to me that is rather sad.

You are an excellent writer. keep it up
Steph @0o0@

Author's Response:

Hi Steph! :D

I love to hear everyone's theories on the story... but you'll have to read on to see if you're right! :D

Yes, Nyah has had a tough time of it growing up, but with the slip of 'dropped off', she's beginning to understand why she doesn't quite fit in at the Stewart home.

Thank you for the compliment! And your review was lovely! :)


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Review #19, by LostInTranslation 

19th May 2008:
When Mrs. Cleary asked how to comfort the little girl, Mrs. Stewart told her to simply ignore the noise, and Pricilla would eventually go back to sleep.

I think this sounds a bit awkward, maybe it should be worded something like this:

When Mrs. Cleary asked how to comfort the little girl, Mrs. Stewart told her to simply ignore the noise, and that Pricilla would eventually go back to sleep.

--

Good chapter overall, although I think it was mentioned that Anna was only 13? She seems (through her actions and dialogue) that she may be a bit older. Also, I love the plot and how Alex saw Nyah ride off on her bike :) very evil lol.

I'm liking where this story is going, you're doing a really good job. I will review later chapters when I review everyone else's :)
9/10

Author's Response:

Hello again! :)

Reading that sentence separate from the chapter, it does sound a bit odd... thanks for pointing that out!

Yes, Anna is only 13 but being raised in the home that she was - there was no choice but to grow up really fast. Mother has no time for 'little children' so their childhood ended when she married Robert and she began her climb on the social ladder.

I'm very glad you're enjoying it, and I'm sorry it took so long to respond to your wonderful reviews! :D Thanks again!


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Review #20, by Rose Wilts 

16th May 2008:
Wow, it just goes to show how long it's been since I checked out you fic, you have a new banner! He he, and a mighty good one at that. Almost as good as the chapter itself.
Once again, you write fantastically. You have such wonderful imagery and flow, it's almost soothing to read again.
Some of the lines you use are just fabulous. One in particular I liked was- But Nyah knew she wasn’t calling for Mother … she was calling for her Mum.
Aw, that made me sad. It was a great line :D
I'm such a naughty reviewer, but you write so well. Great job, never stop. He he

Rose

Author's Response:

Hi Rose!!! :D I'm so glad you found your way back. Yes, a lot has gone on... :)

The banner was a 'gift' from a dear friend "nevillessoulmate" and I'm glad you like it! I'll pass it on to her.

Thank you for the compliments, and I'm very glad you enjoyed it! :) Hope you find time to read on...

Thanks for stopping by!


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Review #21, by Browneyes101 

14th May 2008:
Here I am once again as requested. :)

You simply amaze me as you always have. Once again you chapter just seems prefect in my eyes. I honestly don't see anything that pops out at me. I really love how the ending and beginning began, the middle was a bit shaky for me. I didn't understand the brother part at the middle/end.

Now here comes the bad news. I think towards the end you kinda rushed into it. Like when you realize that you're almost done typing this chapter and you want to hurry and get it done. All you have do is slow down some. But other than that it's a really the only thing that sticks out at me.

Hope I helped.10/10

Author's Response:

Hello! :D Thanks for picking up the story again!

Thanks for pointing out the feeling of 'flow' problems. I'll take a hard look at the chapter very soon and see what I can do to adjust it.

Alexander is watching Nyah from the upstairs window, knowing that she is breaking the rules by sneaking out. He couldn't wait to tell Mother...

I'll also take a look at the end of the chapter to perhaps add a bit more there and slow down the pace. Thanks for letting me know - I appreciate it! :D


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Review #22, by greylady_Ravenclaw 

13th May 2008:
Another great chapter! The detail is great, not too much and not too little. I still can't stand Nyah's mother, but now I can't stand her brother either. Her family is full of evil people other than Anna, her father, and the housekeeper. I can't wait for her to turn eleven and she finds out the truth. (For some reason, I just had a picture of her mother turning into Aunt Marge when she was blown up. xD)

I didn't notice any grammar or spelling errors, which is great! I hope Alexander doesn't ruin Nyah's time at the party. She deserves to have a party more than him. I think he should be forced to live in the basement or some other dismal place. xD

Great job! 10/10

Author's Response:

Hello again! Thanks for reviewing! :D

I'm glad the details are where they should be as I have struggled with that in the past. There is a distinct balance in good and evil, isn't there...

LOL - I guess that would be something fun to do to 'Mother'... an Aunt Marge! I don't know that anyone would be struggling to get her back though! :)

Alexander's 'job' in life is to make things difficult for Nyah... :( If he goes to live in the basement, I'll have to write some rats into it! LOL

Thanks again for another great review! :D


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Review #23, by shadowycorner 

13th May 2008:
Oh, I knew something would turn wrong! And I have to stop reading for tonight! Ugh. Anyway, great chapter. I liked how you took your time with most of Nyah's background and didn't let it be all seen in the first chapter. Therefore it didn't bore the reader, but came as something interesting in the middle of the story. I noticed some typos (when you look, you peek, not peak) and there are a few missing commas in dialogue, but that's okay, I guess. As for the plot, I might say that I'm eagerly waiting for, let's say, Hermione to come into the story and hope it will come soon now.

Anna is really nice and it's funny that twins can be either too alike or completely different, which i think is at one point the case of Anna and Alexander. Well, you're keeping me in suspense, definitely! I wish the main plot would open up a little faster. :)

I like this very much. I'll continue reading later on.

Author's Response:

Hello again! :D

I'm glad you enjoyed the gradual flow of the story. And I understand you wanting the plot revealed soon... but as you'll see as you go along, bits of the plot have already been revealed. As this is a mystery-type of story, it would be rather boring to read a quick synopsis of this, or any mystery... bear with me... it will come.

Glad you're still enjoying it! And thank you for another wonderful review... :)


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Review #24, by Renfair 

5th May 2008:
Yay! I'm back for my Nyah fix! Oooh I'm not liking the ending of this chapter!!! I'm all nervous now about what that little creep Alexander will do (which is kind of funny cause that's my brother-in-law's name, and he was kind of two-faced like that too...) Grrr! Why can't Nyah just have one night of fun? Oh well, I'm assuming that she should be going to Hogwarts soon, or something like that, so hopefully things will look up for her!

Author's Response:
Hey Renny! :D

Yeah, Alexander is really a pain, isn't he? His favorite thing is causing trouble, especially for his 'sister'. There's a lot in store for Nyah... long before Hogwarts is even mentioned... :)

Thanks for reviewing! I really appreciate it! :)


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Review #25, by hedwig1175 

5th May 2008:
Ok, so supper can wait a few more minutes, right?

Uh oh! This can't be good at all! I don't think I like Alexander either. He seems like a little brat. :(

My heart aches for Nyah right now because I know she is about to get into trouble. Poor thing.

You are doing an amazing job and I can't wait to read more!

~Chari

Author's Response:

Hi! :D Did you finally get dinner ready?

Yes, Alexander is a smaller, male version of 'Mother' - out to cause chaos and pain where ever he goes. Nyah realizes what the possibilities are for sneaking out... but, what are friends for? :)

Thanks so much for another great review... now go make dinner before the family starves!!!!! LOL


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