Reading Reviews From Member: Phoenix_Flames
  
1,255 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Phoenix_FlamesDown Comes The Night: Chapter Ten

25th September 2013:
Oh my goodness, oh my goodness!! First off, I must apologize!! I can't believe it took me so long to get around to this chapter!! My schoolwork has kept me way too busy lately, and I only had the time to read this!

And I'm so glad I did!! Why didn't I have the time sooner?! I'm so glad you updated!! And you dedicated this chapter to me!! You are TOO SWEET!!! LOVE YOU!

Anyways, on with the review! I loved this chapter. I guess after all my anticipating how Salazar would react, I guess this isn't the worst. Thank goodness for that. I mean, yeah. He's mad. Wow. But I still have hope for them! Is that good? Or are you just stringing me along and are then going to crush my dreams in the next chapter?! :P I love them together!!

As always this was just a marvelously perfect chapter. So flawless. Your dialogue continues to amaze me. I just feel like I'm watching a movie or reading a book right out of this time. Reading/watching Game of Thrones, or the movie Tristan + Isolde. Or something like that. Even JKR writing the founders herself. That's what I feel when I read this. You just have this era down to a T.

Ahh, my dear! I loved it!! Thanks for the wonderful chapter as always! And the dedication!! You are too kind! :) I hope to read the next chapter soon!! :)


Drue

Author's Response: Oh Drue, I'm so sorry I haven't responded to this review before now! RL has so hectic over the past few months and I kept forgetting. But I'm so so happy you liked this chapter, and that you came by to review. And OF COURSE I dedicated it to you! You were the one that really got the wheels turning when I was stuck, so I had to thank you :)

I love them together too! But yeah, he's none too happy with Helga after this revelation. I actually had a really hard time deciding how harsh his reaction should be. I wanted it to be intense, but my 15+ rating is also really important to me. So I tried to get his devastation across--everything he knew about Helga has gone out the window, he feels--without being /too/ over the top.

I'm so flattered (and floored, really) by the Tristan + Isolde comparison, because that's one of my go-to movies to find inspiration for this story. It's always so great to hear that people really feel the antiquated-ness of the story, and that they're transported to another time when they read it. Thank you so so much!

I just don't even know how to say thank you for all your wonderful kind words! I'm frantically working on the final chapter (I WILL get it into the queue before it closes!), and I can't wait to see what you think of the ending. You are wonderful, darlin!

--Maggie



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Review #2, by Phoenix_FlamesDown Comes The Night: Chapter Nine

18th July 2013:
Ahhh, MAGGIE!!! Oh my gosh, such a great chapter. Out of all the things I imagined happening with the bogart, I did NOT expect this! I thought it would have been Salazar that caused a dilemma with his fear or something. Helga or Rowena even. But Godric was my last guess! Way to keep me on my toes! I love being surprised like that!!

I'm so glad you updated so quickly! I'm so hooked to this story, you don't even understand! I love it, I love it, I love it! Every chapter is always exciting and it surprises me. And every single time I read this, I am amazed at the dialogue you put together. It just flows so smoothly and it really does sound like what they would say and how they would talk.

Such a great chapter! Keep these updates coming! They make my day!

And you also made my day yesterday with those reviews. THANK YOU! I intend to go back and return the favor and review all my favorite chapters over here. ;)

Thanks, Maggie! And great job. As always!

Author's Response: DRUE YOU CAME! I'm so excited you liked the update!

I thought it was time for Godric to have a big moment, and this felt like the best way. Things kind of took a dark turn when he stepped up to the boggart, didn't they? Godric had just held the secret in for so long that it had to burst out somehow. And I do see the thought of losing his loved ones (or failing to protect them) as his biggest fear.

I'm really glad it's exciting for you! That's awesome to hear, especially since I always worry that things are kind of dragging. And I'm so happy the dialogue feels authentic :)

I'll try to keep updating pretty quickly this summer, so hopefully the wait won't be too terribly long. And you're so welcome! I've been meaning to review-bomb you for some time now, the House Cup just gave me an excuse to actually do it :). Thanks again for the awesome review!

--Maggie


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Review #3, by Phoenix_FlamesDown Comes The Night: Chapter Eight

8th July 2013:
YOU UPDATED!! And oh my goodness, this chapter was worth it! I loved it so much!

I loved all the sweet little moments with Helga and Salazar. They are so flippin' adorable. I swear, my cheeks are stinging now from smiling as I read this and giggling. They are just too precious. You really do write their relationship so very well. It's not just a romance, but true and passionate, and with the way you write it, there really is a sense of eloquence to it. It's Helga's thoughts and also their dialogue that just brings everything to life.

I thought this chapter was super great! And I like that they're kinda at that 'secret romance' stage right now. It's cute, and then I also loved how there at the end you had Godric come in with his suspicions!

Such a great chapter, Maggie!

Update again soon please! :D

Drue.

Author's Response: Oh my goodness, hi Drue! I'm so happy you stopped by! And fear not: chapter 9 is almost ready to go to the queue :)

I'm so glad the romance is coming to life for you! I really do love them too! It's so much fun to write their happy-couple scenes :D It's great to hear that they made you smile...that was the goal!

Godric is always a fun one to write. Helga can't keep a secret from him for long! Haha, I always enjoy writing their friendship.

Thanks again for the review, Drue! I'm so glad you're enjoying this, it means the world to me!

--Maggoe


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Review #4, by Phoenix_FlamesGhosts in the Snow: The Sentry's Pledge

4th April 2013:
Oh my goodness. I had been dying to read another Founders fic, and I had been searching and searching. It's just so hard these days to find a well written and original Founders fic. And then...I stumbled across this!! And I couldn't resist, and oh my goodness, hon, did I fall in love!!

This was such a great chapter! Such a great way to kick off the story, and it was so well written. I feel like the dialogue went along perfectly well with the time. I know I struggle a lot with that in one of my Peverell brothers stories. It's so hard to do, but you did it really well.

This was just a marvelous start to what I'm sure is going to be a brilliant story!

Favoriting! Please update soon! :)

Author's Response: Hey Phoenix! I'm sorry it's taken me an age to respond to this lovely review. I'm really happy to hear that you enjoyed this chapter so much! I'm going to update very soon, and then updating will be much faster after that.
Thanks so much for reading and reviewing :)
Athene xo


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Review #5, by Phoenix_FlamesIf Only By Blood: Chapter 1

29th March 2013:
WOW! I feel like that's all I've got to say right now. Just WOW.

I've never read a story where James and Albus seem to have such hatred, or even a negative relationship at that! I've written them with their differences, but wow! It is definitely a nice twist to the stories here on the archives. And poor Lily! I just feel awful for this terrible but brilliant situation you have put the Potter boys in. I'm dying to know what has made Albus be so bad. And for him to kill Lily!

I really will have to read on when I get the chance! You've absolutely drawn me in. And really well written.

Great job! Hope to stop by again soon!

- Drue

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Review #6, by Phoenix_FlamesEyes of a Survivor: Blown Away

26th August 2012:
Oh. My. Gosh. Oh my gosh!! I am SO glad I saw your status. This was an AMAZING piece of work! Absolutely beautiful.

I don't think I've ever read anything so bittersweet. This really was dark, so dark but I felt so moved by it. I love darker things. And it was such a unique take to see in the magical world! Wow, wow, wow. I loved seeing the more human side of Draco. We know he has a good sense of morals and humanity, but I never felt as if JKR really elaborated on it, so I thought it was so nice to see the emotional and devoted side of him in this.

Really. This was a great, great, GREAT piece of work. I have no CC to give whatsoever.

Favoriting this piece right now!! I'm so glad I read this! It's not very often that you come across a beautiful and eloquent piece, emotionally, plot-wise, and also in words. This was flawless!

Author's Response: Ahhh I'm so happy you liked this piece so much!! I really loved diving into the darkness of Astoria's life, but at the same time I couldn't help but hate what I was doing to her. Draco's part was one I was unsure how readers would take, because he is a good person in this, so I'm very happy you liked it.

Thank you so much for an awesome swap and an absolutely perfect review ♥


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Review #7, by Phoenix_FlamesWhen You Go: Chapter One.

24th August 2012:
Hello there!

So I was scrolling through the forums, looking for something to do, and I came across the review tag thread and I decided to give it a go! I found this story and started to read, and I absolutely fell IN LOVE with this piece!

I thought it was great. It was so moving, and it was such a different piece from any other dramas/romances, etc! I loved the complexity of Scorpius' relationship with Draco. I like how different it is from what is normally portrayed. And I love that he understands because he's in love with Rose. I loved that.

This is beautiful. So beautiful and captivating. You really captured Scorpius' emotions perfectly.

I think this story has so much potential, and I really would like to see where it goes! You'll probably see me back for more in the future! So glad I found this! :D

Drue

Author's Response: Hi, thanks for tagging me! :) I'm excited about the new thread, think I'll get involved there a bit more than I used to.

You fell IN LOVE?! That's great! I'm glad you liked it so much. You're the first reviewer to comment on the fact that although he hates it, Scorpius understands because he loves Rose. It's a complex thing going on here.

Thank you for all of your lovely, kind words. I'm very glad that you like my story so much, and I'm looking forward to continuing it! It was originally going to be a one-shot, but it seems there is much more to say. I think a Scorose has snuck up on me.

Thanks again!
Athene xo


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Review #8, by Phoenix_FlamesThrough His Eyes: The First Meeting

1st August 2012:
Hey there, hun! I'm so sorry about the delayed review! You know I'm pretty busy, but I'm sorry about how long I'm taking! With your review and with your chapter. I'll get that back to you ASAP! I'm sorry.

But anyways! I'm here now, and I'm so glad I was able to get around to this!

This was a great chapter! I liked how you moved forward through everything in the beginning of the chapter. There were some pretty heavy descriptions, but it didn't slow the plot down at all or make things seem too slow at all. It was nicely paced and spread out, and it was all necessary. Not only that, but you have such a talent for descriptions. You really, really do. They're unique and paint a perfect picture in my mind. Really excellent job.

Great job with the characters as well! I can tell they're starting to develop their personalities. Lucius is actually seeming like a human being to me, and Sage is so unique! I love it! This is great!

Anyways! I could go on and on about all the things I loved and turn into a fan girl, but I'll just end it here. This was a great chapter. Thanks so much for requesting. I'd love to hit the next chapter, but I've got to empty out the rest of my queue and then I'll be working on your chapter. ;) So feel free to come request again!

Thanks, hun!

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Review #9, by Phoenix_FlamesAn Interesting Turn of Events: Chapter 1

1st August 2012:
Hello there! I'm here with your review as requested! I'm really sorry about the delay, but I finally got around to it!

And I think you're off to a great start. You have some great potential for an interesting, great story. Sometimes Marauder era stories can get a little cliche, but I think you're off to a great take on this.

I feel like Lily has established a good characterization. She isn't cliched or Mary-Sue. I think her personality really shines with her narration. You're doing great!

You're plot is having an awesome flow. I think it's important that the first chapter of a multi-chaptered story captures the reader and really pulls them in, and I feel like you have done just that here. You have really pulled me in, and I'm eager to learn more.

I think that's all I have to say! Not really much stood out to me that I could offer CC on, and I tried to hit characterization and plot, so all in all, I think you're doing pretty well!

Great job! I'll try and get around to the next chapter sometime soon, but I've got to empty out the rest of my queue first. But if I'm not back, then feel free to come request again anytime!

Keep up the great writing! :)

Author's Response: Thanks so much! I wanted to be sure to make people want to read my story, so I'm glad it captured attention and was a good exposition.

I don't want Lily to be a Mary-Sue because it just doesn't seem right. She's young and a teenager, and she makes mistakes just like everyone.

I'll definitely re-request if you're not back.

Thanks for the review!

~Caitlin


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Review #10, by Phoenix_FlamesThe Joker and Her: The Investigation

31st July 2012:
And back for the next chapter. I'm sorry about the wait.

This one was fantastic! I don't really know what help your looking for, so I'm just going to tell you the things I liked. :)

This was a super gripping chapter. I was ready for something exciting, and you really brought it home hard! Great job!

The ending there with Douglas. Wow. That was an exciting twist, and now you have me really wanting to get around to the next chapters!

Again, you're still doing a great job with maintaining Brienne's character. That's fantastic!

Great job! I could go on and on, but I'll just leave it at that. Next time you rerequest, let me know what you would like to have me focus on so I can actually try to give some CC. But CC has become doubtful from me now with this story. I feel more fan-girlish. :P That's great though.

Again, awesome chapter as always! Well done, hun! Thanks for the request!

Author's Response: :D Hi! Thank you sooo much for your review, it always makes me giddily happy when someone says they can't think of any CC xD It probably shouldn't, but anyway!

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Review #11, by Phoenix_FlamesCollateral Damage: Greater Good

31st July 2012:
Oh. My. Goodness. Another one of your spectacular pieces that focus on minor characters with such a unique take.

I absolutely loved this. And Peter. What a unique character to do this with. I usually don't like Peter. He's just so.icky, I guess. :P But here you actually made me like him. I could sympathize with him, and I think that's one of your strong points. You can easily make the reader relate to the character, no matter who they're reading. And that's brilliant. That takes so much talent.

This was beautiful. So excellently. And especially the story summary. Way to draw me in! He enjoyed playing God. So perfect.

As always, I think I'm just ranting. But I have no idea what to say other than I LOVED it. But I've learned to never expect anything less from you. :)

Great job! Thanks so much for requesting!

Author's Response: I'm so glad you liked it! I've always felt bad for Peter, at least in the beginning he was a good person, unlike the Malfoy's who were bad to bone from the beginning, you know? And I figured, if I couldn't make him good, I could at least make him genius.

Thank you so much for your wonderful review, I was scared that when I requested this one you'd be disappointed. :)


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Review #12, by Phoenix_FlamesThe Pensieve: A Flower in a Jar

18th July 2012:
Oh my goodnes, Amanda. This is one of the most BEAUTIFUL pieces I have read in a while!

Oh wow. I love how you went about this one. I really love second person pieces. I feel like they put me into the middle of the story more, and I feel like I really do feel more. And that was no different here. I could feel the emotion.

This was such a different take on any Lily/Severus that I've ever seen! But I loved it. Wow, coming from Lily's narration and that part with Harry in the office! That really pulled at me and moved me.

Then the wedding! I love how you said 'it sealed his fate' along that lines. Which in truth he did. He loved Lily so much. I can only imagine how he felt at that time, and actually I never thought about it if he was there or not. Intersting though, but now that I think about it, I bet he did go.

Just in general this was a flawless piece. I didn't see any grammar mistakes, and I thought it flowed brilliantly. Again, sometimes second person is hard to conquer but you did an awesome job with it and definitely conquered this piece! Great job, hun!

Author's Response: Hey Drue! Thanks for coming by, and I'm planning to come return the favor very soon :)

I definitely felt like I was taking a risk by trying both second person and non-chronological style for the first time in the same piece, but they both seem to have gone over well, so that makes me really happy. I had fun using both techniques and will definitely keep trying them out as I go on!

Different is often what I go for, but I'm always a little afraid that it will divert too far from canon, so it's great that you enjoyed the differences here. I tried to play up Severus's calculating intellect, which is one of my favorite qualities for him, and Lily's 'darker' side, as I imagined it. I'm happy that you felt like the emotions came through well here.

The wedding was really sad to write - it was weird juxtaposing what should be a happy occasion (because I'm not heartless enough to despite James/Lily wholly, not quite) with something so sad, the feeling of utter loss. Defeat, really, which is where 'sealed his fate' came from. When I consider his natural tendency to observe and propensity for being in several places at once, it seemed only right that he would also watch Lily in this moment, even as painful as her beauty must have been.

You're very kind. Thank you so much! :)

-Amanda


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Review #13, by Phoenix_FlamesBreak Out: III.

18th July 2012:
Aww. I don't think I've ever read a piece where Ron is mostly the main focus. I like this change, and you've written him so brilliantly. We know sometimes he's pretty reserved, but when he does speak, he's passionate, and I could feel that. Oh my goodness I felt it there at Shell Cottage with him.

And now they have Charlie to worry about to?! I can't believe this! But they're right. Poor Ron. He doesn't get enough credit. He's been fighting by Harry's side for so long, and he knows exactly what they're going through. He does understand.

Ah! I can't wait to see where this goes. Jane, you're amazing! Great chapter.

Author's Response: I love writing Ron! I wrote a Ron/Luna short story a while back, and I've done a few things from his perspective, and I just love getting into his head. I'm glad you think I write him well! ♥ Ron's emotions are both fragile and strong, at the same time, and he really /feels/ things, I think. Gahh. I adore him.

Charlie indeed! I don't remember why I picked him, of all the Weasleys. I do have a soft spot for him, though, and it does seem fitting in some way. And he's got a bit of a role to play in later parts of the story, too -- at least one chapter from mostly his POV. ;)

I'm so happy you're enjoying the story so far! :3 And I really can't wait for you to read chapter 4, either -- somehow, I'm ridiculously excited to post it. But anyway. Your reviews are lovely!! Thank you so much!


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Review #14, by Phoenix_FlamesBreak Out: II.

18th July 2012:
Oh. My. Goodness. Jane!

Such a great chapter! I still feel like this entire story could go anywhere due to its AU, and that puts me on the edge of my seat! I can't wait to see where you will take this! And you've already changed so much! Oh my goodness, poor Neville! I can't believe it!

For a moment I thought he would be the savior. I thought he would do it or become the new Harry. But now. :( At least he killed Nagini, and I hope Hermione is okay!

Geez. This was such an intense chapter. I could feel all of it as I read, and I was seriously so worried for what would happen.

Hermione better be okay! The way you wrote that ending scene was so moving. I feel so bad for Ron. It took so long for them to kiss, and now for them to be separated like that! I have a feeling Hermione is going to be captured by the Death Eaters, and hence 'break out' will take place. Or I could be completely wrong. You've always managed to fascinate me beyond belief.

Great job, Jane!

Author's Response: Drue! ♥ I sort of love that aspect of this story, that I can really do pretty much anything with it. I kind of know where it's going, but it's a freeing sort of feeling knowing that I could totally veer off in a different direction... and people can't do anything about it. :P Neville killing Nagini is quite important, though! (He was another one I thought would die in canon, especially after the Sorting Hat incident.)

I'm actually really, really pleased to hear that you thought it was intense. :) I struggle with writing action scenes, and this was a sort of way to challenge that, so your positive feedback is so appreciated! I shall reveal nothing about Hermione's fate... or anyone's. Although your assumptions about the title are not off base. ;)

Thank you so much for dropping back by here and leaving me such lovely reviews! ♥ You're fab, and I really just appreciate it so, so much. Love you!


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Review #15, by Phoenix_FlamesBlack Orchid: Snatchers

18th July 2012:
Ahh! What a cliffy! Such a good chapter! Everything was so happy and going so well, and then Dominic has to come in and mess everything up. Ah. This isn't going to go over well.

Such a good chapter, Len! I'm finally caught up! Wooh!! Update soon, hun!

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Review #16, by Phoenix_FlamesBlack Orchid: Enough is Enough

18th July 2012:
AH! YES! The chapter I've been waiting for.

Oh my goodness. What a sweet chapter. This was brilliant. Poor Elsa. To think that much just while he went to go use the bathroom. But it was a necessary epiphany for her to realize, and so much came from it.

Ah. What a great chapter. This was absolutely great! YAY!

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Review #17, by Phoenix_FlamesBlack Orchid: Sirius Comes Clean

18th July 2012:
Len! I'm back for more! I can't believe how behind I am on this. I'm gonna catch up over the next few days!

And what a great chapter again! As always. You never fail to disappoint.

Ah, I had really missed reading your Sirius. I forgot how much I love him when you write him. Love him, love him, love him.

And this chapter did have me question some things. Like what Evander, Elsa, and even James said sometimes. That if Sirius had the scroll, could he have changed it? It's kinda sad to think about. If he had done something different, then Damon could be alive, but I'm not gonna think about that! I think Sirius was right in keeping it. The Egyptian could have killed them all. And Sirius is so in love with Elsa!

Haha I love that thought from James there at the end. Sirius definitely does have it bad for Elsa. ;)

Great chapter, Len! I'll get at least one more done tonight. :)

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Review #18, by Phoenix_FlamesOf Angels and Demons: Chapter 2

18th July 2012:
Ah! Reunited! The Davis' and the Winchesters and Bobby! And Cas is in there now. Ah so good.

As always I love how you write them. They all seem perfectly in character. Normally when I read something with a canon character I can't hear the actor's voice all too well. Like when I read Hermione, I don't always hear Emma Watson or something because it isn't conveyed all too well. But Bobby in particular here I can hear perfectly. The Bobby impression is flawless. And Castiel also.

Gah! Great chapter, Lee! I'm so glad I'm finally caught up! I will NOT get this behind again. :P

Author's Response: Yups, back together again.

Aww, thanks Drue! Yeah, I have that happen sometimes to. But I'm glad my characterization did that for you! That makes me happy. :D

Thanks Drue! And if you do, I shall poke you! :P


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Review #19, by Phoenix_FlamesOf Angels and Demons: Chapter 1

18th July 2012:
WOW! What a way to kick off the sequel, Lee! Ah, and Sentinel Prime. Again a perfect choice.

And then this chapter! Wow! I loved seeing Dean and Caitlyn together. So good. And I loved how Caitlyn made that comment about him being dead inside. I think it makes sense that Dean feels that way, and it's good for him to get that reassurance.

Ah. And then Cas there at the end. And then that huge surprise, wow! So Dean talked to God?! Holy cow! What an exciting twist!

I must move to the next chapter! :D

Author's Response: Hehe, thanks. :D

Yeah, 'Caitlyn' talking to him had been the plan since I had first watched that episode. And yup, it was God the entire time.

Yay!


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Review #20, by Phoenix_FlamesOf Demons and Dark Lords: Chapter 18

18th July 2012:
WOOH! I told you I would get around to it! :D

Ahh! Lee! How have I not read this all the way through? I can't believe it! And what a great way to end this brilliant story.

Aww and I'm so proud of you and your accomplishments in this story! It means a lot to me that you think I helped! This is really a work of art to be proud of. Harry Potter and Supernatural? All in one? And so awesome executed? You've nailed it. This is brilliant. I'm honored to be in your little A/N. :P

Ah! Such a great chapter. And I Rise, You Fall. What a great choice. ;)

What a good way to wrap up this story! And that last sentence - I feel - is a perfect way to allude to the sequel. Which I must move to now!

Ah! Such a good closing chapter, Lee! Love you!

Author's Response: Yay! and you did!

Hehe, thanks Drue. :)

Of course I had to mention you! All those word sprints really helped this story. And that song was going to be put with the ending since I first thought up the ending.

Hehe, thanks Drue! -huggles-


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Review #21, by Phoenix_FlamesAn Isolated Insanity Ward: Most Call it Azkaban

15th July 2012:
Oh, Kay Kay! It's been too long! I keep missing you on skype! We have to catch up soon! But I'll get right into your review as requested! I am so dreadfully sorry it took me ages to get around to this. With work and the House Cup going on, my review thread sort of got overlooked the past few weeks! So I'm really sorry about that, but I'm here now! :D

Ah! And what a unique story!! You were always great with writing these fabulous, unique pieces that no one would ever think of! And you've amazed me yet again! This was absolutely brilliant.

I love how it's from Stan's point of view, and the insight into Azkaban is just fabulous. You pulled me in with these awesome descriptions. I also think you kept him very in character, even with the Azkaban crazyness getting under his skin. His comment about being a drunk duck and all that. I thought it was very good, and it made it very personal. I could picture that Stanley Shunpike from the Knight's Bus again.

Ah and then his name with the counts. That was eerie and sad, and it really got to me. This was such an emotional piece, and I felt terrible for him!

Wow, just in general, this was amazing! Absolutely amazing, and I don't know what else to say other than that. :P Good job, hun! I'm so glad you requested and we better catch up soon! :)

Author's Response: Thank you so much! I've missed you tons and we totally need to catch up! I'm glad that you liked it. I was worried about that specific part of the story where he said 'drunk duck' because of how it flowed. I'm so glad that you could stop by! We'll talk soon! Promise!

-KayKay


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Review #22, by Phoenix_FlamesCurveball: Prologue

15th July 2012:
Hello there! I'm here with your review as requested! I am so dreadfully sorry it took me ages to get around to this. With work and the House Cup going on, my review thread sort of got overlooked the past few weeks! So I'm really sorry about that, but I'm here now!

I think you're off to an awesome start! There's a great connection between all the cousins here in this chapter. I love it when you can feel that family bond just in the dialogue, and that definitely shines through here.

I've also read lots of next gen teen pregnancy stories, but never one that focuses on Roxanne! I love this change, and I can't wait to see how you do it!

I didn't pass too many mistakes. So that's awesome! Nothing that really stuck out to me.

I love how you didn't take forever to introduce characters. I hate that, and in a story that is going to have multiple chapters, I believe that you have to enthrall the reader right from the very beginning. There's no time for boring introductions, that came come later, and you did exactly that here in this! You captured me, pulled me in, and I would definitely be back for the next chapter.

And I love how you put in bits and pieces of Roxanne's personality as the chapter went. Like her smart comments in her head and everything. It really gives me an insight of her character without taking the time to explain it. Awesome!

I think you're off to a great start! Thanks for requesting! Feel free to come by again when the next chapter is up! Thanks again, and I hope I was somewhat helpful! :)

Author's Response: Thank you for this lovely review :)

I wanted to create a strong connection between all the cousin as I wanted a strong bond within the story as it'll be a taught time for them, especially with all lying to their parents and family so Roxanne would feel safe.

I don't tend to write pregnancy story but I came across this challenge and I just couldn't pass up this opportunity plus I wanted to write about a minor next generation character. That has always fascinate me.

I'm glad you liked that little bits and pieces of Roxanne's personality. I want to do it subtly and not too overwhelming.

Thank you for reviewing and I shall be sure to re-request when the next chapter is up.


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Review #23, by Phoenix_FlamesHeaven Can Wait: Turning Point

15th July 2012:
Hello there! I'm here with your review as requested! I am so dreadfully sorry it took me ages to get around to this. With work and the House Cup going on, my review thread sort of got overlooked the past few weeks! So I'm really sorry about that, but I'm here now!

And what a great chapter this was! I think you're off to an awesome start! I definitely have a week spot for Marauder era stories, and you've pulled me in to this one and captured me. I love it.

The characterizations are pretty good so far. I like James and Lily's interactions. It's not your typical cliched interactions, but it's different and intriguing, so keep that up!

I loved the ending of this chapter. It was chilling, and in my opinion, so perfectly true. In retrospect, I think Lily and Snape would have always been friends if it weren't for James. It's sad how true it is, but I've never read that on a story here. So that was a different touch. Really great job.

You're off to a great start here. You don't take too long with introducing characters but rather jump right into the plot. I love that.

There was some funky spacing going on at times, especially those last few paragraphs at the end. There are three or four lines bunched together and then a break with the same thing, and a few missing commas here and there but nothing major! That was really the only thing I noticed.

I don't think I can help much with the Brit picking. That's definitely my weak spot. I quite often get called out for it in my own things, but anyways. I didn't see anything that stood out to me so I think you're doing fine with that!

Anyways! I think that's all I have to say! You're off to an awesome start! And it's very original, and the plot is coming along nicely!

Great job. I would love to get around to the next chapter, but I've got to empty out the rest of my queue. If I'm not back in a few days for the next, feel free to come rerequest! Thanks for introducing me to this story! :)

Author's Response: Hey! No worries at all, I've been busy with House Cup stuff and RL stuff and thuse the late response :/ sorry about that.

Ahh! Great! I'm so happy to hear that the first chapter pulled you in! I always wonder if the first chapter is strong enough and will get the readers to keep reading.
I agree with you (as you read) that Lily and Snape might have remained friends if it werent for James but I think there were also many other factors (other than James) that led to their fallout.

Yes I realised the spacing was a little off, I'm trying to fix it but it's not working out like I hoped. Anyway thank you for pointing it out I'll see what I can do.

Thank you so so much for the lovely compliments and helpful thoughts. I highly appreciate it :)
I will definitely be back to re-request!

~Cali.


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Review #24, by Phoenix_FlamesBecause I Love You: Face Off

3rd July 2012:
And I'm back, trying to catch up on this!! :D

Another great chapter, Leslie! AND I LOVE HOW THIS CHAPTER ENDED! With their conversation all throughout the chapter, I knew they couldn't just leave it like that. There was too much history between them. I could feel all of it and their old feelings for each other. I just KNEW it was there, and I think I could feel that both Molly and Finn didn't just want to leave things as 'we ran into each other on the street.' Things had to go on further from there.

And then there at the end! I got so excited! And Molly better not break things off again. Scaredy-cat.

I can't wait to see where things go. Great chapter, Leslie!

Author's Response: Yes, this argument had to happen between them or things wouldn't progress. Both of them, especially Finn, had things to say that had gone unsaid before Molly had left for Australia when they had finished at Hogwarts. I'm glad you're still enjoying the story, Drue, thanks for reviewing!

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Review #25, by Phoenix_FlamesWe are Broken: We are Broken

3rd July 2012:
Awww, oh my goodness. I'm so glad I saw your status and responded, because I found this painfully beautiful piece.

This was so sad, but so moving and I loved it. I love how you threw the flashbacks in there and we went through the relationship with Hugo and Acacia together. And then there at the end. I saw that you posted this was your first sad one-shot, so I just kept waiting for that moment when the sadness would hit me. I was prepared for it, but still the way you wrote it was just beautiful and so moving.

You did so such a great job. This was beautifully written, and I can understand there at the ending why Acacia acts the way she does. I couldn't even imagine a mother's loss like that.

Really, such a beautiful piece. I loved it! You did a fantastic job. :)

Author's Response: Thank you so much this means a lot :)

I know I couldn't imagine losing something so precious like a child or someone you truly care for (Hugo losing Acacia). I'm so happy that you found this one-shot moving as I was worried I wouldn't do this any justice so you cannot imagine how happy I am to hear this :D

Ha! I have an obsession with incorporating flashbacks into my stories as I think it gives the story itself more of a backbone as sort to speak.

Thanks once again for doing the review swapped :D


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