put down your vest - completely unnecessary. this is quite a good start i think - your writing could use a little clarification, but since this is your first story that's only to be expected, and a beta will definitely help with the editing process. all in all, an excellent first chapter! update soon!Author's Response: Thank you so very much! It's exciting to get a review from one of my favorite hpff authors! Thank you, again. :) xo Report Review
ahhhhh! you finally updated and now all i want is MORE!!!!! it was fantastic - an excellent rendition of a Diagon Alley trip (some of them get a bit silly - in a bad way) and also a fabulous depiction of Hagrid and Mr. Ollivander. Spectacularly well written - i love this story because you aren't rushing it. there's nothing wrong with a nice long story where the plot actually develops over, say 50,000 words, right? anyway, did i mention i love the story? and that you should update again as soon as you possibly can or - or - or i'll be forced to start picketing outside your house wearing a gigantic headdress that says something ridiculous about Harry Potter! ha, take that!
Author's Response: Yes, I finally updated. Sorry it took so long - the end of the school year was crazy. But now I no longer have to worry about analyzing supply curves or graphing polar equations or memorizing trigonometric identities . . . YIPPEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!! So I should have a lot more time to spend on more important things like . . . writing :)
I'm glad you liked how I portrayed Hargid and Mr. Ollivander - I was worried that I didn't get their characters quite right. Yeah, I'm a big fan of long stories. I really wanted to make sure I had time to develop the characters and I didn't want to rush into any major plot developments (ahem, cough, Dublin and Harry, cough), so things may seem a bit slow but I promise, they'll start to pick up soon.
Haha, picketing outside my house in a giant headress? You're starting to sound like Dublin's crazy aunt. Maybe I'll withold my update - that might be interesting to see :) Um, right, just kidding. That would probably be just a tad weird. OK, how's this? I'll update soon if YOU update soon. Deal? Report Review
this is really cute so far! the pov shifting is a bit confusing, but no bad once you get used to it - that's a really hard thing to work with, i know. putting the rest in third person will help. but very well done - i love it. update soon!Author's Response: I'll update as fast as I can and thanks for reviewing! Report Review
alright, i'm a horrible person for reading this story and never reviewing till now - because i love it. absolutely LOVE it. what cracks me up most of all is the fact that as Dublin was describing herself, i read the words "black Converse sneaker" and looked down at my own feet...black converse chuck taylors. and then "ratty Brand New" band t-shirt....and i looked down at my own torso....ratty Brand New band t-shirt. i actually had to stop reading to howl with laughter, because they whole time i was reading all i could think was "i completely understand this girl...completely" and here were are, dressed exactly alike!Author's Response: That is freaky :) But very, very funny. And pretty damn cool. I'm glad to hear you really relate to Dublin - I tried to make her really accessible, and to make her experiences universal. I mean, obviously not everyone gets to learn magic in an enchanted castle with The Boy Who Lived, but I think just about every person on the planet has embarassed themselves publicly at some point, which is something Dublin does quite freqeuntly. Thanks for reading and letting me know what you think! Report Review
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