Reading Reviews From Member: Haronione
  
33 Reviews Found

Review #1, by HaronioneReason Free From Passion: Chapter Three

20th August 2007:
Another brilliant chapter! This story is getting really interesting now!

How sad that Ginny has walked away from the remaining members of her family. Will this be sorted out by the end of the story, does she finally realise that she needs to move on as the rest of the family have? She is so hardened in this fic, and must be leading a rather lonely life - no wonder she gave into Draco so easily! She may put it down to trying to gain his trust in order to get her revenge, but deep down she is probably yearning a bit of love (even though it isn't love, lust more like) and company. Well that's how I see it anyway. I'm looking forward to see where Ginny and Draco go from here, and how they both feel the morning after!

I love the relationship between Dean and Ginny (I think I've said that before but I'll say it again anyway lol)and the interaction between them is great, as is the Draco/Ginny interaction.

Again, brilliant chapter and I look forward to the next update :D

Author's Response: Wow, late response to this! AND I haven't read your new chapter yet! *is not good* :( Will get everything done though! :)

Ginny's relationship with her family developed mostly unintentionally, but once it was there it fit the story and we shall see how conclusively I wrap that up :p . I have a good idea of what to do though so it should work out. Glad you see that as the reason she gave into Draco so easily as that's what I intended but was worried didn't come across. Though 'yearning for a bit of love' .... a tad cheesy :p .

Dean is just fun, I love writing him. Didn't realise he'd turn into such an important character when I first got this idea, but he has and I like how it's gone :) . Thanks for the great review! :)


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Review #2, by HaronioneAs Wings Unfold: Chapter Twenty-Five - A Birthday to Remember

2nd August 2007:
Ok, so I say this every chapter, but I'm sure you don't mind ;) - What a fantastic chapter!! I really loved it!

Alice's present to Lily was great, very practical but also fun :) Will Lily's day of training come up again further on in the story, I wonder. The interaction between Sirius and Peter was good, I could imagine Sirius being like that with Peter if he interrupted him, but then he would have acted completely different if it had been James. I'm looking forward to how you portray Peter's betrayal and the reasons for it. I also really liked Sirius and Claire's conversation, it looks like it's going to be an interesting relationship between them. I'm also wondering why Claire had a 'small smile' on her face after Sirius comment, very interesting! I loved the Marlene/Caradoc stuff in this chapter. Men really can be idiots sometimes (sorry to any men reading this! lol) The ending was brilliant, I had a big smile on my face as I read the last scene :D What a great way to be proposed to. I wonder what her answer will be lol!!

Well, I have come to the end of the posted chapters, be prepared for some nagging now :p In fact, I'll start right now! Update soon!!! :D

Author's Response: lol, and I never get tired of hearing it ;) .

I'm glad you liked the present, I realised I had written myself into a corner with her whole 'I don't know what to get you!' cos then I actually had to come up with something rather than just skim over it *rolls eyes*. I'm always a little unsure on Peter's character but I try to have him present and actually in the scenes. Ah, Sirius and Claire, just wait and see :D . Glad it's interesting to you! And yes, men can be, but it was very fun to write that. I was anxious about the last scene but it came out as well as I could have hoped I reckon.

You need to nag me more, I have to write another chapter soon! Thanks for your review! :)


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Review #3, by HaronioneAs Wings Unfold: Chapter Twenty-Four - Lost and Found

2nd August 2007:
As always, a great chapter :D I am even more intrigued by Claire after this chapter. She is very confident and it seems that she is unfazed by anything, which after being held captive by Death Eaters you'd think she would be. Is this just because she can see what is going to happen in the future and knows that she is ok? I can't wait to see what she See's happening in the future!

How sweet of Lily to think of inviting Claire to her party - a very Lily thing to do in my opinion. It was nice to see Jasmine back with her friends again, even if it was only briefly. It was nice to see that it was like she'd never been away - a bit of light relief for her. And again, poor Sirius, a few moments of passion and then she's gone again. You're not very nice to them!! lol I am left wondering, as Jasmine was, why Voldemort is keeping such a close eye on her - what on earth does he have planned for her!!!

On to the next chapter now (only one more chapter before I start nagging you for more :p)

Author's Response: Hee, Claire's a lot of fun :D . I love writing her even though sometimes her character is a tad on the daunting side. I don't want to say too much about her yet though :p . I will just say it is early days with her in the story, you don't know her well yet, but hopefully soon you will. What makes you think you'll get to know what she Sees, at least before it happens in any case? :p

I'm glad you think that it was a Lily thing to do, in truth I was looking for a way to have another opportunity to write something of Claire lol. And I know, I am an evil person ;) . But it all hopefully makes for a better story, don't you think happily ever after would be boring? :p All shall become clear though...eventually.

Eek, I better get writing again lol, glad you enjoyed the chapter! :)


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Review #4, by HaronioneAs Wings Unfold: Chapter Twenty-Three - Blinded

27th July 2007:
Another great chapter PhoenixStorm! Well, I'm pleased to see that Marlene and Caradoc finally kissed, nothing like a near-death experience (well sort of) to make people act upon their feelings! Poor Jasmine, she really is having her life dictated for her, i wonder how she'll feel about Voldemorts plans for her. I am very interested in the blind seer and what part she is going to play in this story! Another new OC, Yay! I do like your OC's (not that I don't like your writing of the canon characters :)). Great chapter, now on to the next one :D

Author's Response: *snigger* Indeed, they needed something to give them a push at least! You'll feel more sorry for Jasmine by the end I think :p . Would you believe I haven't quite decided exactly how it will end for her?? We shall see I suppose. I like Claire, she's going to be so much fun, and she IS important, but why I shall not tell you :p . OC's are fun, and I get more attached to them lol. Glad you liked the chapter and thanks for the review! :)

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Review #5, by HaronioneAs Wings Unfold: Chapter Twenty-Two - Justice and Revenge

26th July 2007:
Well, it's been a while since I read this fic and I'm glad I finally got back to reading it :D

Jasmine's father seems like a really horrible man, speaking to and treating Jasmine more like an employee than a daughter, poor Jasmine. I wonder what she was writing to Sirius that afternoon, do we find out? Does she ever send it? Or is it found by someone else? I really liked this line in the second scene 'Regretting something you've done is infinitely better than regretting not doing something' I totally agree with that! So, is Marlene going to make a move on Caradoc? I hope it works out well :D The duelling practice scene was great, am really looking forward to you writing some real fight scenes :) I have a feeling that at some point they will be fighting against Jasmine, Moody's speech about fighting people you know was rather ominous!

The characterisations, as always, were spot on. I'd forgotten just how well you write the marauders, Lily and Snape! This was a really good chapter and I'm glad I still have 3 chapters to read without having to wait for an update! So, on to the next chapter!

Author's Response: I'm glad you got back to reading it too! :D

Jasmine's father came off just right then ;) , I wanted him to be rather streotypically horrid. But ahhh, you will just have to wait and see about the letter and whether or not you ever find out what happens to it. That's my favourite line too! :D And I firmly believe in it. You'll have to see on the Marlene thing, but you might get an answer sooner than on the letter thing :p . You might be looking forward to some real action, I am dreading it!! lol, writing action is so difficult. Nice point about what Moody said though, guess you'll see on that too!

I'm happy you still find then IC, I love their characters but sometimes think I may be doing what I want to do with them rather than what they would actually do. THanks for reviewing, hope you enjoy the rest of what's up! :)


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Review #6, by HaronioneReason Free From Passion: Chapter Two

26th July 2007:
Yay, an update so quickly!! Well, it was another great chapter. I love your characterisations in this, I could really see Ginny and Malfoy being like that after the war :) The interaction between Ginny and Dean is great. I love the way he stays so calm when Ginny is so furious :) She really is obsessed with catching Malfoy! The interaction in the last scene was brilliant too, and I'm interested to see exactly what Ginny will do to get justice! I'm looking forward to the next chapter it sounds like it will be very interesting!!

Author's Response: I know, isn't it shocking how quickly this got put up?? But I had to sow off the banner lol. Glad you like the characterisations, and especially the bit about Ginny and Dean's interaction as Dean's is an utterly unfamiliar character for me. He's fun though, and his role is getting more important, I needed someone for Ginny to talk with at work. I'm hoping I can stick to my 5 chaptersish thing, but will see exactly how twisty I want to make this in Ginny's quest for justice :D . Thanks for your review! :)

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Review #7, by HaronioneReason Free From Passion: Chapter One

19th July 2007:
Hey PhoenixStorm! I know I said I was going to read and review tomorrow but I decided I couldn't wait ;) Wow, I really like the start of this story! I love the way you have characterised Ginny now that she is older. It's hard to tell how some of the characters from the books would be like after the war, afterall they could be completely different from the people they are in their school days, but I can really see Ginny being as you have portrayed her. I really love your writing style in this story (not that I don't in any of your other fics :)) it has been written brilliantly. I can't wait to read the next chapter :D Hope you update soon (I will be nagging you if you don't ;) lol)

Author's Response: Ooo hey! I did not notice this before you went to sleep! Yay though, I'm so glad you like Ginny and find her to be believable. That was something I was particularly concerned about, whether people could still see how I write her as having grown from the character she was or if they'd just think I was totally OOC with her lol. Happy you enjoyed it anyway, and that you like how I've written it, prodding for updates is allowed because I need it ;) . Thanks for the review! :)

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Review #8, by HaronioneAs Wings Unfold: Chapter Twenty-One - Order Headquarters

3rd May 2006:
Again, sorry it's taken me so long to review, forgive me? ;) Anyway, it was another great chapter :)

I really like the way you dealt with the aftermath of Lily's parents' death, you showed how Lily dealt with it without going into it too much. I also liked the interaction between James and Sirius in that scene, it really made me giggle, especially “Just because your girlfriend’s not up and about, doesn’t mean you have to turn into her!” I could just imagine Sirius saying something like that in that scenario :)

Ooh, and more Jasmine stuff :) I liked the scene at the ball with Snape, especially this line “I just want you to know I don’t want to be talking to you,” Jasmine informed him primly what a way to start a conversation, lol! I'm guessing Snape knows about Jasmine's role as a spy for Voldemort since he thinks of her as a 'tool in his master's armoury', am I right?

And yay! they've made it to the Order's headquarters :) I liked the way Sirius and James wanted to explore the headquarters by themselves and not have a guide, it's so typically them, imo :) And what a great introduction to Mad-Eye! I loved this line in that scene “Moody,” Marlene said to Lily in a low voice. “Sure is,” Lily agreed disdainfully. and then Lily's reaction when Marlene points out that she meant he's Alastor Moody, haha!!

Remus and Alice?! I was going to mention something about them a couple of chapters back when Remus was staring at Alice in the library (at least i think they were in the library) I had a feeling something was going on there, and now I think that even more, but i guess I'll have to wait and see ;) It's an original spin on Alice's and Frank's relationship - I've only ever read fics where their relationship was perfect etc (not that I've read many, but still) so it's nice to see it a bit differently (at least I'm getting the impression that it's not perfect ;)) I look forward to how that storyline progresses :D

Well I've really rambled on, so I'll stop now. Good luck with your exams!! I'll be here waiting for an update when they are over :D

Author's Response: heehee, you'll never manage the first to review :p ;) .

lol, well I wrote myself into a bit of a corner there, I wanted to move the story on but I couldn't not deal with her dealing with their death so it was abit of a dilemma, but in the end it kinda worked out i suppose :D . That scene between Sirius and james got me going on this chapter, I got that part out and then managed to get through the rest; I had fun wriitng that particular scene though :D .

lol, yep, more 'Jasmine stuff', planty of that coming up I should think. Soon as I've got it straight in my head after I've adjusted the plans to fit what my beta has suggested ;) . And yes, it's perfectly safe to tell you that Snape knows about Jasmine :) .

lol, I thought they'd prefer to explore by themselves if what we kno of them in Hogwarts is anything to go by. And I just couldn't resist the Moody thing :D , I wrote it in and then deleted it because it seemed so easy, but then I liked it too much to not have it in :D .

See that's exactly what I wanted to write, there are no perfect relationships, and you're right about Alice and Frank being portrayed that way in fanfic. I do like to be different after all ;) . I'll be saying no more on this though :p .

lol, thanks, I'll need all the luck I can get! :D . I'll let you know when I do write more of course, thanks for the great review as always! :)


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Review #9, by HaronioneAs Wings Unfold: Chapter Twenty - Setting Up Home

13th April 2006:
Sorry it’s taken me a while to get round to reviewing, but here I am, eventually :D This was a wonderful chapter, as always.



I really liked the spin you put on Lily’s parents dying. The way you have written it gives a really good explanation for why Petunia tells Harry his parents died in a car crash. By not only having them die in a car crash, but having Lily involved in it too was great. While Petunia should be thankful to Lily for saving her, she’d rather place the blame for their parents’ death on her, and wishing it had been Lily who died instead. And poor Lily, thinking she’d failed her parents when it really wasn’t her fault, but having Petunia make her think it was. Sad, but brilliantly written :D



My favourite part has to be when Sirius and James turn up at Remus’s. I really liked the way Remus was so shocked to see them there and then Sirius and James acting like he should have known they’d be there. As I’ve noticed in past chapters, you are very good at balancing out the sadder parts with a bit of light-heartedness.



The interaction between Marlene and Caradoc was great. I wonder how long they’ll be able to keep their feelings for each other to themselves now that they are living together – from the way it’s going, I don’t think it’ll be long ;)



The Lily/James interaction in the end scene was wonderful too. I can’t wait to see how their relationship progresses after this :) Well, it was a great chapter and I’m looking forward to the next one :D


Author's Response: :D yay you're here! well you can take as long as you like to review, you always get here :) . And htis time with immensely well spaced paragraphs too ;) .

lol yes, you know how long i fretted over what to put into this chapter and when i settled on the idea I really got into it :D . I'm glad you thought it turned out well. It was actually quite difficult to write to start with, but then it seemed to work out :) .

lol, well of course, it can't all be doom and gloom, where would be the fun in that ;) . I liked writing that bit, it was something I knew I would write into the chapter as soon as i was finishing the last one. still determined to make you cry of course :p .

well you'll just have to see won't you ;) .

I liked writing that bit, it moved them on well in the relationship and it was about time Lily started trusting him a bit. Thanks for the great review (wide spaces and all :D )!


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Review #10, by HaronioneAs Wings Unfold: Chapter Nineteen - Marauder Memories

16th March 2006:
This was another wonderful chapter, PhoenixStorm :) What an amazing final prank, pure brilliance! It was a really nice way to show their past pranks, and give a bit more detail on James's pursuit of Lily :D And what better way to leave Hogwarts than by replaying their time there. Loved it!!

I really liked the scene with Narcissa and Snape, you write Snape brilliantly! And this line from him was great “When we are outside of the confines of this building, then the real battle begins.” so very true!

I also liked the interaction between Marlene and Caradoc. I do hope they admit their feelings for eachother and find some happiness in eachother before the inevitable happens.

Poor Jasmine, things are only going to get worse for her now she's left Hogwarts, aren't they? I liked this line about her food seemed to hold little appeal to her nowadays though she tried to hide it around others who isn't put off their food when they have things on their mind? And she sure has alot on her mind!!

Now, the end of this chapter was brilliant. I especially liked the 'PS' part of the message, it really had me giggling. They certainly left Hogwarts with a bang - literally! I look forward to reading your portrayal of their life after Hogwarts (even though I know you'll probably have me in tears more than once!)

Author's Response: yay! you like the prank :D. As you know, took me rather a long time to work out ;). and it had to be great of course :D. Yes, I kinda missed out on all those times James must have tried to get her attention and got rejected by writing only from 7th year so I really liked doing that one :D. It was hard htinking up suitable pranks for them all but it was fun :D.

I really liekd wriitng this scene (obviously, it had snape in it ;) ). and, well, things planned, but saying no more :p.

er...um...well, you'll see :p.

I'm afraid that what i have in store for Jasmine is not exactly hapy ;). But again, you'll see, stop mentioning things i can't talk about in review responses!! :p.

heehee, that was a complete afterthought, it really was a ps. I had no idea what I was going to write there but it seemed wrong they should just leave even if they had done the final big prank. I also felt somethign was needed to recognise James and Lily being together :D. yes *gulp* have to write outside of Hogwarts now! *doesn't want to*. it will be your turn to keep me on course now :p, make sure I get my next chapter up in two weeks even though I haven't got a clue what's supposed ot be hapening in it! :D. Thanks for the great review as always :).


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Review #11, by HaronioneThe Beginning of the End: The Hospital Wing

15th March 2006:
This chapter was so sad, I have tears in my eyes now! I've grown quite fond of Megan, she's a wonderful character, and I dread to think what else she is going to go through!! The way you wrote her reaction to losing the baby was done wonderfully, as was the way you wrote the reactions of her friends when they found out she was pregnant. I really hope Megan and Sirius have some good times before it all goes wrong (which, sadly, I know has to happen). Another great chapter :D!

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Review #12, by HaronioneThe Beginning of the End: Discoveries

15th March 2006:
OMG!!! Megan's pregnant?! Oh how fate works in mysterious ways! If she hadn't have been pregnant she would have shook hands with Peter and everything could have been so different for James and Lily!! How's Megan going to deal with knowing that later on?! There were a few things in this chapter that I really didn't like the sound of (not in a bad way :D). It was the moment that forever sealed Megan Hogan’s fate. and then The Dark Lord would kill to get his hands upon her, quite literally. Please say he doesn't get his hands on her!! And the part where Megan shakes hands with Amelia, that does not bode well!! And poor Megan, having to see the terrible fates of all her friends (and others) and not be able to do anything about it, what a horrible thing for her to deal with! Also - and I never thought I'd say this ;) - poor Snape! (I meant to say that in the review for the last chapter) Sorry, rambled on a bit here, but it was such an amazing chapter :D!!

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Review #13, by HaronioneThe Beginning of the End: After the Ball is Over

15th March 2006:
Ooh, this was a wonderful chapter!! Now, part of me hates Peter already, but then part of me feels sorry for him - He's confused, life as he knew it is changing and he doesn't know how to deal with it. In a way, you can't blame him from thinking things like that, after all, he is a pureblood and was probably brought up with those beliefs (well, in your portrayal of him ;)) But still, he's a dirty little rat!! I loved this line from Remus, it really made me giggle :D “I may be a bit of a rebel when it comes to school rules, but even I wouldn’t disobey an direct order from the headmaster.” You characterise them all so well! And ooh, I really like your portrayal of Snape, I've never imagined him to have been one of Dumbledore's spies all along so I look forward to see how that story line goes :D

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Review #14, by HaronioneThe Beginning of the End: Segue the Second

15th March 2006:
Aww, I really liked the James and Lily interaction in this chapter, you write them really well :D. I also liked the Marauder interaction, especially this line - “Oh lord, whoever would have thought you’d be suggesting I do the right and noble thing?” James said with mock severity. “I know, if I’m not careful I’ll become a good influence.” lol!! Megan is getting even more interesting. She's leaving Hogwarts early?! I'm intrigued by what Dumbledore wants her help with! This was another great chapter :D

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Review #15, by HaronioneThe Beginning of the End: Segue the first

15th March 2006:
Yay! I've finally found time to come back and read some more :D! This was another wonderful chapter (I have a feeling I'm going to be saying that in all my reviews ;)). I really like the way you have Megan and Amelia getting the same reaction from the male population of Hogwarts, but for doing different things to themselves - Amelia making more of an effort and Megan making less of an effort with their appearance. Also I like the way they have different reactions to the attention. I'm looking forward to reading more, and seeing how the romances will play out :D. On to the next chapter!

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Review #16, by HaronioneThe Beginning of the End: The True Seer

9th March 2006:
Yet another great chapter! It just keeps getting better. I really like the OC's you've created, especially Megan, she seems to be a fascinating character with an interesting power/gift. I'm going to add this story to my faves :D

Author's Response: Thank you very much, Haronione :-) The entire story switches POVs throughout and that was a choice on my part. When I wrote this two years ago there wasn't a category that fit it well so I put it in the James/Lily area. Megain did prove to be a popular character - although consider yourself forewarned, I put her through heck in this story as I do all of the characters. I hope you continue to enjoy it and I truly appreciate your letting me know. I confess, I love writing OC's and Megan in particular was fun to write. You're right, by the way, she has an interesting gift - she's a particular kind of seer - and I explain that indepth at a later point. Take care and best wishes. - shade

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Review #17, by HaronioneThe Beginning of the End: Conversation

9th March 2006:
Haha, I loved this line “Barely. I think I lost my pulse earlier but I seem to have found it again.” I think I'd lose my pulse listening to Binns drone on about goblins too :D. I also loved the conversation between Lily and James the croaking scummet frog, lol! The humour you have in this story is brilliant, i was giggling almost the whole time i was reading this chapter! Ooh, I'm looking forward to reading about some romance for Remus, which I feel sure will happen. I do like to see him have some happiness :D. This was another great chapter!!

Author's Response: Thank you again, Haronione. I appreciate it when readers take the time to review. Actually, there's a funny story about how I came up with "How does James start to win Lily over?" Since I'm a woman I based this in part on advice from a good male friend of mine and the funniest thing I could think of from my own past - my (now) husband accidentally dumped an etire pitcher of half and half on me on one of our first dates. For some reason I made him nervous and there he was babbling away, gesturing towards something when I suddenly found myself drenched in half and half. In a voice that sounded almost exactly like nothing I've ever heard from him before he croaked out "I'll just skip dousing you with coffee to avoid a lawsuit." as he turned brick red. I've never heard his voice crack like that before or since and seriously, the color he turned made me wonder if he was quietly having a stroke :-) Thank you for reading and reviewing. Take care.

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Review #18, by HaronioneThe Beginning of the End: Teaching and Watching

9th March 2006:
Ooh, I never would have thought that McGonagall would have played a part in getting James and Lily together, another original spin on the story of the Marauders! I really like the interaction between the Marauders, it's just as I imagine them to be. But *gasp* Peter having thoughts like that about Lily... I've always wondered about what made Peter go over to the dark side and betray his friends, and this looks to be a very interesting theory on that :D. I look forward to seeing how that story line progresses! This was another brilliant chapter and I'm going to have to delay doing the housework for just a bit longer to read the next chapter!

Author's Response: Hi Haronione :-) Peter's journey throughout this story is actually quite complicated and utlimately horrible but I didn't want him to start out that way. Mainly he's jealous that his friends have a life that he has no part in. The entire thing with McGonagall was a fun way to have her be a part of it all without realizing it. But my favorite parts were the ticking and the owl hooting "Bing!" - it was a funny way to forshadow something - I hope. But on the original posting I had a lot of reviewers that were evidently dying laughing over the entier "Bing!" thing. I'm so glad you like the chapter and thank you for letting me know. Take care!

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Review #19, by HaronioneThe Beginning of the End: Fleeing Filch

9th March 2006:
This is a great first chapter! I'm hooked already :D I love the way you have started the Lily/James romance, very original - I don't think I've ever read a fic where Lily starts to see James in a different light because he's just pulled a prank! Your characterisations are wonderful and just from this first chapter I can see that it's going to be an interesting and enjoyable story! Well I can't (and won't) wait to read the rest so I'm off to read chapter 2 now :D

Author's Response: Thank you :-) Throughout the fic I treat James and Lily as foregone conclusion so the challlenge was truly in finding a way to have them begin to merge without the seemingly traditional shouting match that bizarrely ends in a good snogging. There are a lot of OC's in this story and I had a blast writing the Maurader dialogue (that comes in to play later). My version of Lily is not the traditional spitfire version either and of course, all of this was written prior to HBP. I hope you enjoy it and thank you for taking the time to review.

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Review #20, by HaronioneAs Wings Unfold: Chapter Eighteen - N.E.W.T.s

5th March 2006:
I know you had a bit of trouble with this chapter, but it turned out perfectly :) It was just as I imagined they would all be as they did their exams and neared the end of their time at Hogwarts. Right from the opening scene this chapter had an edge of sadness to it (i refuse to comment on Sirius and Jasmine in fear of sounding repetative ;)) and I feel quite sad that they'll be leaving Hogwarts!

I liked the way you concentrated on Lily and Remus during the exams, to me it showed what was important to each of them - while Lily and Remus were concerned and stressed by the exams, James and Sirius had a more casual attitude about them and so their exam experience was not really mentioned (if that makes sense).

The character interactions in this chapter were, once again, wonderful :) I especially liked the scene with James and Lily, and also the build up to the Marauders' final prank. I really like the way you had a humorous line here and there to break up the sadder parts of the chapter. “Well, you’ll need somebody with an ounce of sanity in that flat eventually,” she teased. and “Don’t get me wrong here,” James warned, “I wasn’t jumping in to make sure you were okay; I was jumping in to make sure the squid really had got you.” had me giggling (not snorting though, sorry ;) lol)

I'm really looking forward to finding out what the prank is, something to do with the paintings and tapestries? *has no idea* Whatever it is, I can't wait to read about it :) Another great chapter PhoenixStorm!

Author's Response: lol yes you do know I had a bit of trouble with this chapter, all my argh!'ing and rushing to get it finished seems to have turned out ok though :D. Yeah, I wanted it to be sad as it's their final year; let's hope you don't burst into tears when they actually do the leaving :p. I feel sa they'r eleaving too though ;).

Yay! you noticed how I concentrated on those two! I thought it would be a more accurate representation of exams if I wrote from Lily and Remus's perspectives just as you said. And yep, makes perfect sense :).

I did enjoy writing the scene between Lily and James, I need them to move along a bit in their relationship and move into that comfortab;e and at ease with each other zone. :D, ah, that was my favourite part to write, the jumping in the lake thing. I am glad it made you giggle (though obviously sorely disappointed there wasn't a snort in there too ;) ).

I absolutely refuse to comment on what the final prank is, you're just a little too close for comfort! :p. Though secretly I am impressed at your perceptiveness, or maybe you're just tuned in to how I think now! ;). Thanks for the wonderful review once again! :)


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Review #21, by HaronioneA Mother's Worst Nightmare: one shot

25th February 2006:
This is the second time you've made tears well up in my eyes today! This was wonderfully written, and you captured Lily's emotions of that fateful night perfectly. I loved the way you had Lily still watching over Harry after her death, it was a nice touch. I do have one mistake to comment on (but only one :)) the things I wished for my son started to race thru my mind. it should be through, not thru. An excellent first story!

Author's Response: Thanks Nic! I am glad you enjoyed it, and sorry that it made you cry.

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Review #22, by HaronioneAs Wings Unfold: Chapter Seventeen - Quidditch Cup Final

18th February 2006:
Wow Phoenix! This was such a wonderful chapter, I actually have tears in my eyes for Jasmine. Having to go through what she's going through and then having to lie to her friends too. I'm really looking forward to the rest of the Jasmine storyline, although I think you may have me in tears by the end of it. I've grown fond of Jasmine, she is a wonderful character, and I'm worried about what will happen to her!!

A lot of time passed in this chapter, much more than any other chapter, but it flowed well and was excellently written, as usual! Jasmine's excuse for why she was gone so long made me think of Sirius inheriting money from his uncle Alphard. Yet another parallel between them, even though Jasmine's situation is fabricated, and Sirius's is real.

Once again I loved the James and Lily interaction, they are getting much more comfortable with other now and it's lovely to see their romance progressing. I loved the scene in the common room, it is just so James and Lily - Lily being concerned about James and James trying to convince her he's fine. And this line Instead of feeling angry or betrayed, he smiled ruefully, knowing that Lily was her own person and would always do what she wanted whether he liked it or not. Besides, he would have done the same for any of the Marauders, intense friendship was something he could understand. shows just how they are understanding each other so much better, it's just so lovely. The last line of that quote is wonderful, so very true!

My all time favourite part of this chapter is the end, it's so lovely yet quite sad at the same time, to me anyway. The way Sirius is hesitant, wanting to make sure it's what Jasmine really wants to do, but having to use superhuman willpower to do so, shows just how much much he really cares for Jasmine. I've read a few fics that have Sirius as a lady's man, and that is so not how I see Sirius being. Your characterisation of Sirius is wonderful! I felt this line was sad Was it so wrong, she thought to herself desperately, to want to feel again? I just feel so sorry for Jasmine. I really wish her and Sirius could live happily ever after, but we all know that can not happen! *cries*

Well, I think I've rambled enough now, but there was just so much I wanted to say, I absolutely loved this chapter!! And this, my longest review ever, is your 150th!!!! As always, I'm looking forward to the next chapter, i'm sure it will be as wonderful as this one :)!

Author's Response: Haronione! Haroninnie! Har-onee-onee! Whichever you prefer! :p, thank you for the lovely review! *calms herself and focuses on review*. Yes, it is my aim in this fic to make you cry now :p, and you will, I have a very angsty chapter coming up, I may even make myself cry while writing it! But it has to happen. Yes, you should probably worry about what is going to happen to Jasmine, but that's all I'm saying :p.

Ah another comment on the time, I needed it to happen! They need to get out of Hogwarts (urgh, writing graduation is killing me, for some reason it just won't work properly!). *giggles* "even though Jasmine's situation is fabricated, and Sirius's is real" *pats Haronione* yes, dear :p. But you used the apostrophe properly so yay! :D.

Yeah, i wanted to develop James and Lily slowly, they couldn't just fall in love, Lily needs to be worn down but there will come the time when she is glad James has worn her down of course *wants to write that time so much!*.

Ah, the agonising I went to over that last part *rolls eyes*. Very happy to hear you liked it, and that it made you get tears in your eyes! I wanted it to be sad, but still something special and meaningful. I want that happily ever after for them too, but I'm afraid it would screw up the rest of my fic :p. I htink soon the real big stuff will start happening, well it's got to , can't keep writing this fic forever :D.

yay! my 150th review!!! Never reached this mark before *celebrates*. I will get the next chapter written I promise! You've made me want to write some right now! Though I am still stuck on this part in the chapter and it may take a whil eto work through <_<. Thanks again for the lovely review! :)


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Review #23, by HaronioneAs Wings Unfold: Chapter Sixteen - A Mystery Solved

2nd February 2006:
Wow, Jasmine's family are evil! Poor Jasmine! Jasmine said in a previous chapter that she didn't have the bravery of a Gryffindor, but it's a pretty gutsy thing to stand up for herself in that situation (that's not a cririsism on your characterisation btw ;) the opposite in fact, I couldn't imagine her acting any other way) But I guess time will tell just how much courage she does have! I now have a bad feeling as to what will happen with Marlene and how you have planned for her death to come about. It was nice to see a bit of Lily and James fluff(ish), it lightened the mood before you hit us with the Jasmine horror! I also enjoyed finding out a bit about Remus' past even though it wasn't a happy event we learnt about, it certainly explains why he didn't have a romantic partner for the ball. I can just imagine Remus keeping his problems to himself, not wanting to burden them on any one else, especially if that person had problems of their own to deal with. As always, the characterisations were wonderful and it was a great chapter. I am totally gripped now (not that I wasn't before, as you know ;-)) and once again you have left me begging for more :) !

Author's Response: lol, yes I wanted a good evil family for her to come from (though you know, her mother isn't that bad, a victim of self-centeredness is probably her only crime). You know, you're a little too observant in things like this :p. I think I may veto any hints whatsoever in our pm's ;). But yes, time will tell (and only time, my lips are sealed!). I did want to have something to soften the blow in there, and I'm glad you liked the little scene with James and Lily. It's one I've had written since about 3 chapters in, finding a place to put it has proved a difficulty, but I found one! :D. Yes Remus's past, I'm toying with an idea about him (more sub-plots!) that may creep its way into the fic, but you'll have to wait and see as ever :p. Thanks for the great review!

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Review #24, by HaronioneAs Wings Unfold: Chapter Fifteen - Mysteries and Changes of Mind

19th January 2006:
Oh dear, poor Jasmine (and poor us having to wait 2 weeks to find out what it's all about ;) lol) As always I loved the interaction between Lily and Snape, I'm sure there is more to come between them and that this euphoria potion is more important than we think. Mmm, I wonder what Snape's big plans are for that potion. Anyway, loved the chapter and look forward to the next one : )

Author's Response: lol, never satisfied, read one chapter and demand the next :P. I shall be on at you to write yours you know, interfering dogs or no ;). but yes, 2 weeks to go I'm afraid, and I'm glad you like the interaction between lily and snape, I promise it's not pointless ;). Ah now, that would be telling about the euphoria potion (ha, take that temptation :D ). thank for reviewing as always, and i look forward to your next chapter too! ;)

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Review #25, by HaronioneBrotherhood of the Traveling Hot Pants: Hello...Evil.

5th January 2006:
Hey, you Productive Lunatics (very appropriate name by the way : ), lol) Well what can I say, another amusing and brilliant chapter! Oh dear, poor Draco (not that I feel sorry for him) what an attire to be wearing when Colin is roaming the halls, lol! I really liked this line - 'Well, perhaps if you would stop shoving food into your enormous mouth, things would look as good on you as they do on me...' ... 'Not possible.' Ha ha, me thinks Draco secretly likes those hot pants! I did notice a couple of little typo's in this chapter though. In the line I just quoted you wrote 'looks' instead of 'look', and 'Draco spit out the last word with disgust' you wrote 'spit' instead of 'spat' Anyway, I loved it and look forward to reading about Pansy and the travelling hot pants. Haronione x

Author's Response: Harione!! We really don't think anyone is safe while the hot pants and Colin are both roaming the school!! Thanks for the amazing review! BTW yes we feel the name Productive Lunatics is definitely appropriate for us!! - The (aptly named) PL's

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