Reading Reviews From Member: ChocolateHorses
  
17 Reviews Found

Review #1, by ChocolateHorsesMasked Rapture: Everyone's a Suspect

11th December 2004:
That candy was so incredibly imaginative, brilliant I say! I would have never in my wildest dreams thought of such a thing! Ooh, it makes me want to know more... and I'm rather curious as to if Rupert could possibly come back in the story... and I completely love the Hippocampus, I love that mythological creature to pieces... as it is sorta like a horse... and anyway, excellent, if you could be a dear and tell me when you update I'd be incredibly gratified. I'm happy to say I found no grammar mistakes and the story is coming along at a good steady pace, the only thing that makes it a bit confusing is switching from one character's mindset to another, smoother transitions between Harry, Ron, Hermione, and Malfoy's thoughts would be excellent, but it's a wonderful start any way you look at it! Cheers!

Author's Response: The candy thing impressed me too. As i was typing, I decided to have chocolate be the second secret note, and then the whole idea just came to me. It was probably a fluke. I'm glad you found no grammar mistake; half of the time i spend with my story is reading and fixing it. How could i transition better? I know what you mean by the rough transitions, but what's a good way to fix it? Thanks again for reading it. I'll tell you when i post next; with christmas break coming up i should beable to post this month. No school makes it a lot easier to type.

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Review #2, by ChocolateHorsesMasked Rapture: Letters from a Lover

11th December 2004:
Hmmm... It's predictable, but in a good way of course... as usually Draco/Hermione stories are so... and again, I love your way of writing and the bickering between Harry, Ron, and Hermione are very believable! One more chappy to go!

Author's Response: thanks

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Review #3, by ChocolateHorsesMasked Rapture: A New Beginning

11th December 2004:
Very good! I like how you don't start them off as having secret crushes or something to that degree... and a break in friendship really is a good loophole! I like your style of writing, and it's very smooth and easy to get into! Off to the next chapter I go!

Author's Response: Thanks for reading my story. I wasn't sure if you'd have time or not.

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Review #4, by ChocolateHorsesTHE DARK DAYS AHEAD: THE UNINVITED GUESTS

19th November 2004:
I really like the beginning, very JK Rowling in style, reintroducing everything. I also loved your attention to detail, with the owls, and I just found your writing smooth, and a lot like JK's... the only thing I would suggest is that the fight starts rather abruptly, and your writing turns rather errotic. More attention to detail, maybe how he's feeling at the time, what's running through his head, and not have everything come at you at once. Otherwise, touche! And I'm off to read the next Chapter!

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Review #5, by ChocolateHorsesToo Unlikely: Prologue: Letters

9th May 2004:
Awww, now you can't do this... You should have read some of the reviews I got, nasty. It was fun however, to write this long essay-like comment for the review taking out your wrath, really vents your anger, seriously try it. You are truly a good author and it is a waste of good talent to just give it all up because people are good for nothing, low, foul, stinking, lousy gits with no lives and the only thing they can actually do is write stupid reviews. God, I hate them! You know, I think I'm gonna vent out my anger for a while. YOU RETARDS NEED TO GET THE F&^# OUT OF HERE IF YOU DON"T LIKE PPLS WRITING! If you have a problem with it, DON"T READ IT! It's a choice, no one's forcing you to read OR review. To Quote Thumper from Bambi, "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all." Try telling them what they can do better. that's YOUR Opinion and no one elses, so just GRRRRR....... I hate these people. They just eat you away from the inside, like a disease! Evil gits!!! Gah! If you ever need to talk to anyone, you can msg me on Yahoo and AOL under the screenname Chocoholic10101 or email me. I feel your pain, and it is truly fun to write an evil comment, especially if you use big vocabulary! Well, that made me feel a lot better, sorry you had to read all that, but I hope you do take into consideration what I said, and good job! ~The ChocolateHorse

Author's Response: ChocolateHorse you really are priceless you know that? i dunno lol i think i'll write some more, but i've asked admin if maybe the reviewing privilege could be reserved for logged in users so they could be reported for this kind of thing. yeah alrite i'll give it another shot lol :D

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Review #6, by ChocolateHorsesLearning to Catch Her Breath Again...: Dreams Of Draco

25th April 2004:
Alright, this is a pretty good story, I'm impressed! Um, the dream? or daydream? was a little confusing, but I am rather tired, so maybe it's just me. I like the story, though you might want to think of something that would set it apart from the rest! Thank you for the flattering email, and tell me when you update! I'd be happy to r/r when I get the time! I'd better be working on my story, I've neglected it long enough! LOL, TTYL ~The ChocolateHorse

Author's Response: Thanx, I'll take your advice. Afterall, I'm just getting the hang of it. So I'll tell you when my story adds it's next chapter. Thanx for the review. I'm really a fan of yours and anyone else who is really reading this read her story, Faith, Trust, and Pixie dust it's really good. Well, I also have to go. I'm thinking of something really good to make it different. So I'm just writing as I go, and stuff really depends on how I feel. So, we'll just have to see how things turn out now won't we? Shorty16

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Review #7, by ChocolateHorsesA Wall Between Us: Lost Passion Secrets

6th April 2004:
Hey, this is REALLY Great! I have to leave, but I PROMISE I'll read the last 2 chapters ASAP! Great Job again! ~The ChocolateHorse

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Review #8, by ChocolateHorsesA Wall Between Us: Never Loved

6th April 2004:
You are TOO Kind, anyway, this is a GREAT story, so full of feeling. You got all aspects of this kind of ship, Draco w/ his friends, Hermione and her friends, and them battling their own feelings! You GO! ~The ChocolateHorse

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Review #9, by ChocolateHorsesClose Quarters: Reap What You Sow

13th March 2004:
Hey! Pretty good story, things seem a bit rushed however. Like the first night she's there she realizes she loves Draco, and then suddenly their engaged? A bit confusing, maybe I'm missing something. Then when she says she's not ready, Draco has sex with someone else! Someone has some mood swings! But I'd like to see where its headed, I really like the whole ring idea! So cool! Keep writing! ~The ChocolateHorse

Author's Response: ta m'dear i'm kinda going for the unpredictable draco - he gets a hell of a lot more unpredictable :) do you reckon i should include a prologue thingy? just to sort of put it all into context. i will do that methinks ta for the review :)

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Review #10, by ChocolateHorsesWhere Fate Awaits: The Wecoming Feast

27th January 2004:
Very interesting and unique story plot! I can't wait to hear what happens, one suggestion; try using more adjectives and adverbs and try to be more descriptive! TTYL ~The ChocolateHorse

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Review #11, by ChocolateHorsesSHUT UP, WILL YOU??: A MISTAKE OR AN UNINTENTIONAL SLIP-UP?

24th January 2004:
Great! Very funny and the kiss was awesome because it didn't make them automatically fall in love like it does in some stories! Keep it up! ~The ChocolateHorse

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Review #12, by ChocolateHorsesSparks from fire: Day 5

13th January 2004:
Very nice, just one suggestion... I would try re-editing the chapters and capitalizing names like granger/ Granger and hermione/ Hermione! Just a little grammar thing to make your story look more professional! I can't wait to read more and am looking forward to you updating, Sincerely ~The ChocolateHorse

Author's Response: thanks for the comment, i've edited all my chapters and capitalized the words. most of it shuold be right now, but i might have left out some. feel free to comment again if you spot anything k?? :)

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Review #13, by ChocolateHorsesOf Love and War: Chapter 3: The Revelation

10th January 2004:
Keep it up, it makes me dizzy with all the changing parts! Just my l2 cents; I would try to concentrate more on the Hermione/Draco, there was like hardly any of it in this chapter! Maybe at least always start and end with it, it'll seem more connected. TTYL! ~The ChocolateHorse {First Reviewer}

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Review #14, by ChocolateHorsesOf Love and War: Chapter 2 : Potions, Commotions, and Notions

10th January 2004:
Cool! Keep it up, Draco seems a little too lovey-dovey... but maybe it's just me! Can't wait for more! ~The ChocolateHorse [I'm FIRST]

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Review #15, by ChocolateHorsesOf Love and War: Chapter 1: A Window of Opportunitiy

5th January 2004:
Heya, just rereading ur story... Ur on top of me on the charts! Grrr... LOL JK! Anyway, hmm, my suggestion would be not so much 'kissy kissy' at the beginnning, people might think it's mushy and not read it! [don't worry.. it's not bad now! It just could, I KNOW ur a hopeless romantic] and, I wanna see Ron have some love in his life, poor Ron! His sister and his best friend! Um, maybe Lavender or Parvati, though they are gossips! Anyway, TTYL! I hope they get updated soon!

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Review #16, by ChocolateHorsesOf Love and War: Chapter 1: A Window of Opportunitiy

3rd January 2004:
YAY~ For someone who's never been kissed, I'm really impressed LOL! I can't wait to see how it turns out! Hey, I got my new chapter up for Faith, Trust, and Pixie Dust...PLEEZ read it Siri! Anyway...ur killin me w/ suspense!

Author's Response: Seriously? lol I don't wanna go bak to school! Yeah... I guess... I dream of stuff like that so maybe that's what was my "muse" lol! Well seeya at school!

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Review #17, by ChocolateHorsesAtlantis: Uneasy Dreams

15th December 2003:
Great Story! Can't wait for more!

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