Ahhh! he can't leave! he just got back with molly! oh she had better be peeved with him about leaving without even discussing it with her! grr! Even if they had a good snog session before that, it so does not make up for him leaving! Blah!
I still loved it thought, despite the implications of what is to come.
Off to the next chapter (though that might have to wait til tomorrow).Author's Response: Well, he did only just learn about after their picnic and he's planning on telling her when he sees her on Thursday (or maybe he'll see her the following day... :P) so don't be too mad at him. It's not like he's irresponsible or being a prat. Just wait and you'll see what happens. Thanks for *finally* reviewing!
-Leslie Report Review
You know, I could just smack these two. I swear, they act more like teenagers now than they did when they were teenagers. It's rather quite funny. Though, I daresay they need to do a little more than snog, I think, to get each other's absence out of their system.
On that note, you know I don't like romance (which makes me wonder why I read this knowing it's gonna be chalk full of romance), it wasn't over done to the point of making me gag. Though you came quite close with that whole "I don't love" then she does love him, scene. Almost too much for me.
However, I'm still glad these two wised up and got back together. I rather like Finn's idea of them both quitting their jobs and moving to a totally different country. Seems it might be the only thing that would work for these two, despite the fact that Finn would easily relocate for her.
Loved it!Author's Response: I wouldn't say they're acting like teenagers as anyone who were getting back together after a break up and several years of not seeing each other would have a lot to say (argue) before the bridge to the greener side can be crossed.
Well, that's Molly's stubborn personality (that she gets from Percy) coming out in her when she forces out 'don't' and I wouldn't say that that's too far into romance as it's actually considering drama (which is the other genre I've marked for this).
Well, of course they're back together. For them to be together they needed to have that argument, otherwise it wouldn't have worked out between them this time either. Some things need to be said before two people can move forward and these two had to get rid of the baggage they had been carrying for several years before any good could come of a relationship between them. From now on it's all down hill from here. Thanks for reviewing! :) Report Review
Well, well, what do we have here? A Hermione/Snape and by the lovely Siriuslypeeved at that! And a fic I can start from the beginning with!
Well, let me start by saying I absolutely LOVED your description of the area. Having never been to Salem myself, it most definitely helps. Also, I think I might have choked a little on Snape's comment. It was perfect for him and had me chuckling. The death of Snape and Fred will always be the two I wish never happened.
And I do believe you already know I'm a closet shipper of Snape/Hermione. So I'm thrilled to see you writing one. I can't wait to read more!
LenAuthor's Response: Thanks Len! I did recall that you were a closet SSHG shipper *shifty eyed* I had a really good time with the descriptions of the area, so I'm doubly glad you enjoyed them. Thanks also for your comment on Snape's snarky dialogue ;)
Glad you enjoyed it and hope you continue to do so!
Mary Report Review
So apparently I forgot to review, which is completely like me as of late. But I came back, see!
As I already told you, the cliffhanger is horrible! As a writer I understand the need for them. As a reader, I absolutely hate them! I'm so curious as to what Caitlyn has planned. I wish I knew. Seriously!
Also, can I just say I love the boys? I seriously missed them. I might just have to go back and watch some repeats. Anyway, I'm worried about Abby. I get that she's grieving. But darn it, it's been two years. She needs to move on already!
Anyway, love it! Please update soon? I'm dying to know what's going on!Author's Response: Hehe. Well, of course I would not let you forget to review. :P
Oh, that one was minor compared to the ones that I got planned for later on. If you hated this one, you will probably want to strangle me later.
Hehe. And she's moved on. Acting more like her sister is her way of moving on, of keeping her sister with her.
Hehe. Oh, I'm sure you'll get plenty of peaks during word sprints :P Report Review
Bam! Right from the get go you had me wondering who the barmaid was talking to, and who she was too. When you listed off who the patron was associated with, I tried to think of everyone who it might be. Let me tell you, I was no where near close. Why? Because I didn't even think to guess about half the characters, to be quite honest. And most certainly not the ones you've chosen. However, that being said, I absolutely love that this is about Rosmerta and Caradoc.
Given that you've written this in a style not at all like your norm, I'll give you credit for writing it this way all the same. I think the style gives the story an air of mystery. Something for us to look forward to. It works well with the plot, and I think you've done excellent with it.
It should be interesting to see where you go with this. Good luck!
LenAuthor's Response: Hey, Len!
See...I think that the beautiful thing about this story is that it can really be about any two characters. To refer back to ee cummings' poem, they really are nobody and anybody... So the fact that you spend the entire chapter wondering who they are makes me wonder if I missed my mark. Their identity isn't what's important in the slightest.
Also, I feel like you giving me credit soley because this story is a bit out of my normal writing style is a bit of a discredit to the story itself. Mystery is not my intent here, so again, I'll have to revisit this.
Thank you for your review. Report Review
Oh boy. I suppose Lily and James should be like their parents, not allowing the authorities to take care of things. Nope. Not these Potter children. Which should be expected. I mean, I bet Harry, Ginny, Hermione and Ron have spoken to each other at great lengths about the trouble their children could get into if they were anything like their parents. Which they are.
I love it!
Thanks for the dedication!
LenAuthor's Response: Hehe, it's a genetic trait to not let the authorities take care of it, even though the authority is now their father. It's just part of being a Potter, diving into the unknown and possibly dangerous. and you're very welcome, love. :) Report Review
Hey there, Len here from the TGS review exchange.
Let me first start off by saying you started this chapter of with a bang! It was an excellent way to grab the reader's attention from the get go. However, I feel that it was slightly disappointing as I continued to read the chapter, because I was expecting much more action that never seemed to come. Granted, I found the scene between Ollie and Elena to be quite cute. And this chapter was an excellent way of introducing your main character. I just wish that the bang that started this chapter off was carried through to the end of it.
Your synopsis screams of this murder mystery, and most certainly grabs the readers attention, making them open the first chapter. It would have been excellent to see that here, to begin with such a punch that you could not help but continue to read.
The writing is excellent and the characters are interesting. But I feel that the chapter ended on a low note.Author's Response: Hi Len!
Thank you for the review and I'm sorry I didn't respond sooner!
I do see your point about the beginning being a bit of a let down. I think that this chapter was more about introducing Elena to the readers, as you said. And there is certainly tons more action in the next chapter, to make up for the lack of it so far. But thanks for saying that.
Your point about the summary is a good one. Perhaps having switching the first and second chapters wouldn't be a bad idea, to make the 1st chapter a flashback, of sorts. That would help with the momentum.
Again, thank you for the input, I appreciate it! I will definitely think about what you said, in terms of minor and major edits to this story. Report Review
At first I was a little confused as to what was going on. I sort of wish we knew who the character was in this chapter, but I'm sure it will be revealed in the next chapter or onward. It was a fairly interesting way to start the story. I rather liked it.
The description and imagery you use is fabulous. I really liked reading about the way Helena changed her wedding dress so many times. Or how the diamonds glinted in the light. It wasn't boring in the slightest. You did a fabulous job!
(from the TGS fic exchange)Author's Response: Hi Len! Thanks for exchanging with me!
I can see your point, but I kind of wanted to leave the mystery in there for a reason, just so that I could set up the story with a more abstract and imagery-centric prologue. Don't worry, if you keep reading, I think you'll figure out who the characters you see here are.
I'm very happy the imagery worked for you. It was fun to describe the Mirror and imagine what Helena might look like in her wedding gown. It's great that you enjoyed reading it!
Thanks for your kind review :)
-Amanda Report Review
So I know this review is LONG over due. I'm so sorry I didn't get this written when we were paired together for the review exchange a few months back. But I promised myself that I would read and review it all the same once I had time. Which is now.
I really enjoyed the second half of the story more so than I did the beginning. Mostly because we have already heard the tale of the three brothers from the book. Though, I do believe it was necessary to add this part into this chapter. It sort of eludes to where Dominique might end up, again, assuming that she's time travelling.
I really enjoyed the second half of it the most because we can see how Dominique interacts with her family. How she seems closer to Harry than she is with some of the others. I really enjoyed getting to see this little sneak peek into Dominique's character. And the accident at the end was fabulous.
I loved it! Report Review
You know how much I already love this. And you know what I think you need to do, yup that's right, you need one from Scorpius's pov now.
Anyway, this is all sad and lovely all at the same time. I mean, Teddy is realizing that he doesn't have Rose's love the way he thought he did. I just wanna hug him. Except for the fact that you've set this up so I really want Rose with Scorpius.
Love it!Author's Response: LEN!
I know! I thought about doing that, it /would/ make things feel complete - before I thought I'd done than when I wrote Teddy. Scorpius' perspective will be very sad, I think. He's had a rough time. Haha, this is about Teddy and you're still Team Scorpius - I love it.
Yess. You do feel bad for him, they've been together for a while, and to find out that she wasn't really there makes the everything feel like a waste. Or it wasn't really a relationship to begin with.
I'm happy you like this! Thank you for reviewing!
Lia Report Review
at least these two are getting back together. I mean, it would be really bad if she came back and didn't even see him. I'd be mad as hell. Though, I can't wait for the fluff between these two to start up again...and yes, I did just say that.
Molly should not make promises she's not likely to keep.
Otherwise, I absolutely love the chapter. Sorry it took so long to finally get to it.
LenAuthor's Response: I'm going to have to hold what you said about fluff, that needs to be written down and permanently enshrined somewhere. :P Report Review
I may understand why he had to do this, but still, gah! Stupid boy!
An excellent chapter. Well worth the wait. Though, I must say, not sure I like waiting for the next one. Try not to make me wait a million years for that one? Please?
LenAuthor's Response: Well, Ch 7 is up now and yet you still haven't raced to it. But I'm happy you still enjoyed this chapter! And Finn is a stupid boy, but he did have reason to do it as you so rightly said. Molly has to know where he intends to take their relationship or she'll still take off at summer's end. Thanks for reviewing! Report Review
Dean talked to God? That's not what I was expecting but it makes sense. I didn't believe it was Caitlyn, but I didn't think it was god. Loved it dear! Now you must work on chapter 2. Maybe tonight? Lol!
LenAuthor's Response: Yup, he talked to God. That idea has been in my head since that episode aired. Hehe. Thanks Len. And I will. :) Report Review
You know, Finn seems much more like the girl in this relationship than he does the guy. I mean, going home and being consoled by his mom seems something I would do when I was upset about a boyfriend. I don't think my brother and mom ever had conversations like that. But then again, my brother is a player, and even with his fiancee, he's a jerk. So it's mostly us yelling at him to smarten up. But, Finn definitely seems more the emotional of the two.
I really like that Declan showed up. You know I rather like him. It was a nice, sweet (again girly) moment between the brothers. It's like the conversations my sister and I used to have when she was having boy troubles. But I still liked it.
I really love that Finn walked into WWW and found Molly there with Erin. I can't wait to see how that turns out. Because, you know me, I've been looking forward to this moment since you began this sequel.
ILY! AND I LOVE FINN!!Author's Response: It's not about who's the guy and the who's the girl and I completely disagree with you here. Guys are different with their moms and grandmothers than they are with other people. I mean some treat them all the same, but for the most part they're a lot softer when they're with their mothers. There's that maternal connection there that makes the guy able to open up more.
As for Declan and Finn's talk, a lot of guys talk about their feelings (mainly brothers/best friends) when they are sure they won't be overheard. Out in the open they have to appear like their secure, but when away from the public scrutiny, they can open up and reveal their insecurities. At least that's what I've discovered about guys, though I'm still clueless about them. Guys say we're complex, but at least you see what you get with us. With guys, you never actually see within them until you're alone with them and they really open up.
Technically it was outside of WWW, but same difference. Glad you enjoyed the chapter and thank you so much for yet another review! :) Report Review
Wait...what? What seal is Alex talking about? I mean, I know we discussed this bit, cause, if I remember correctly, I gave you the idea, but...what seal? I'm confused. I want the sequel now, please? Pretty please? Don't make me beg. Begging is so unbecoming for a Slytherin. But, I might be persuaded if it means I get the sequel quicker.
Anyway, I was really shocked about Sam and Dean getting Order of Merlin: Second Class. I can't even imagine why Alex would try and pull that one, cause it seems...weird. He's a demon. Unless...wait a minute, was that a seal? A muggle getting an Order of Merlin? Seems plausible.
Caitlyn makes me laugh, but I'm so glad that she gave the boys some dreamless sleep potion. Except Dean just needs to deal with his issues on his own. No potions necessary. But we know Dean, he is so not that type of guy. *huggles Dean*
Anyway, love it! You're fabulous, Lee!Author's Response: Well, I'm not going to repeat the answer to that since I already told you. :P And yes, I plan on starting the sequel as soon as possible. I just have to finish flushing everything out before I start writing it.
Yups. And I explained the motive behind that one to you already as well. :P
Hehe, I'm glad that you like her. Yeah, he still has his issues. :P
I'm glad you enjoyed it Len and thanks so much for reading and helping to push me along while writing! Report Review
Hey there George, this is Len, your Secret Santa. I've come to leave you a lovely Christmas review!
You know, this is quite an interesting tale you've woven. I certainly wouldn't have thought of this story for Gregory. But you've done an excellent job with this one. I really rather like it. Some people will definitely go to any lengths to obtain friendship and you've totally shown that in this story.
While it is completely sad, I am certain that the sorting hat would know better than to place a muggle-born into Slytherin. As I'm pretty sure even it would know the life a poor muggle-born would live while in that house. Plus, during this time period, I would imagine the Slytherins 'accidentally/on purpose' killing Gregory than allowing their house to be tarnished.
That said, I still enjoyed it.Author's Response: Thanks Len! I'm glad you like it! Someone had to be the first muggle born at some point though right? I do think you're right about the Slytherins killing him though and the teachers not having a problem with it. Actually now that you mentioned that, it brings up a whole new train of thought. I may have to explore that. Thanks! Report Review
I'm with Lance. Who in their right mind likes snow? I'm friggen Canadian and I hate snow. Stupid white stuff can stay the heck away from me. I dunno where Percy and Audrey live, but depending on where they live, they might not get snow either. Loads of places in England (as far as I'm aware) don't get much snow. Last winter being an exception.
I really think it was sweet that Percy and Audrey purchased a greenhouse for Molly to use while she was there for three months. Though, it is probably a waste of money, since I don't see Molly staying in England past those three months. But, it was still sweet.
As for Declan, you know what I think of your Irish boys, right? Or do I need to repeat it? Just in case you have forgotten (which should be impossible), I luffs him. Though I still love Finn more. Anyway, I think it was really sweet of him to promise not to tell Finn that Molly was back so long as she wrote Finn. But, I think Finn'll get mad knowing Declan never said anything.
As always, I love your chapter and can't wait to read more.Author's Response: They get snow. Audrey and Percy live near St. Ottery Catchpole, and in the books the Weasleys always had snow in winter.
Don't say it was a waste so soon... never know... :P
Yes, I know you love my Irish boys, but it never gets old to hear it. I take pride in writing both Finn and his older brother Declan. Thanks again for reviewing! Report Review
So, you asked for a review and here I am. (If it's crappy, blame it on the fact that I'm utterly exhausted right now)
I really liked this chapter. The ribbing Finn takes from his friends in the chapter, it is so like they are still in school. These kids have not grown up one bit. Well, Finn has, but the others have not. But, I'm not really surprised. I imagine purebloods are much like your typical Hollywood Socialites.
My only real issue is that I kinda wish the conversation between Delcan and Finn was longer. It doesn't feel rush so much as it feels like there is a lot left unsaid between the brothers. Now, I also know that they have lunch planned, but a lot can happen in a week. And for whatever reason, it just makes me wish the two of them would have talked a bit more before going to bed.
What I absolutely love though, is the fact that Molly is constantly on Finn's mind. She is always there, always present, just waiting for the right time to pop in and distract him. Of course, I can also see how this would be annoying to Finn, but I like it all the same. Now if she'd just stop being stupid and get back with him.
LenAuthor's Response: Thanks so much for the review, Len! I'm glad you enjoyed Finn's relationship with his friends and how I chose to portray. To me, all guys will act the same around each other when no females are present. And even often times when they're out together for a drink. This is especially true of men in their twenties (while they're more mature than they were in their teen years, they still have a level of immaturity that always sticks with them), so I'm glad that came off well here.
Yes, more Declan and Finn interaction will occur throughout this novel. And Molly is very much on his mind, some things will never change. Thanks again for reviewing! Report Review
Ink and books? My only guess is that it might be Theodore, but you know I am still sorta hoping for Draco, right? Which is saying a lot, because I'm pretty sure at the beginning I was against him and Anna.
Anyway, I'm glad Anna told Blaise. I just hope he doesn't go and tell anyone else. She did say he can't keep a secret. The last thing she needs is for Voldemort to come after her and her mother because he found out that they lied.
Looking forward to the next chapter. :DAuthor's Response: Really? Well, you'll soon find out...Anna certainly does. Either way, it's still all up in the air who she ends up with. I dunno, I keep changing my mind. Anna and Draco's relationship has become a bit complicated considering their circumstances. I'm actually amazed here, Len. I've gotten you to like all Malfoys (well, so far Draco and Scorpius)...I wonder what I have to do to get you to be on Team Lucius now :p
I'm glad she did too. It would be too much for her if she didn't. Hmm, we'll see if he blabs, but if it's to protect his best friend then I hope he keeps it to himself.
Thanks for reviewing, Len! I always look forward to seeing what you think. Also, thanks for review number 60!
Lia Report Review
Hi there, this is Len from the TGS Fic Exchange.
So at first, my first thought was that this was about Lily and James and Harry. And then as I read onward, I realized that I was completely off base. This was most definitely about Neville, Frank and Alice. It was rather lovely, in a sad and lonely way.
Moody is such an awesome character and I think you've done a wonderful job capturing his character in this piece. It was fabulously written. And I rather liked that you never really name the character, because you don't really need to. You give us enough information that we can figure it out all on our own. Granted it takes a bit to figure out that you are talking about Moody as he remembers Frank and Alice and how he aspires to teach Neville how to avenge his parents.
But I can totally see their torture as one of the reasons he heads to Hogwarts in Goblet of Fire. I can see his devotion (if you want to call it that) to Frank and Alice as a reason to take an interest in Neville.
I really enjoyed this.
LenAuthor's Response: Hi there! Don't worry, I was really aiming for people's first thoughts to be of Lily/James/Harry so that completely means that it worked the way I wanted it too, ahha :)
I'm pretty scared of writing characters which are mentioned a lot in the books for fear of getting them wrong and just ruining him - and this is the first thing I've tried with a character like Moody for like years and years It was really fun so I'm really glad you like it :D
Thanks for such a lovely review! Expect one in return soon ish :) Report Review
YAY! IT'S UP! IT'S UP!
Now, I would (still) like to smack Molly. The dolt left such a lovely boy and now she is sort of regretting it. It would so serve her right if she returned to London and found a girl on Finn's arm (even if he doesn't love said girl).
It is so nice to see Molly having grown up a lot since the end of Why Not? I can only imagine how Percy is going to deal with this new and improved Molly. I might smack him if he is still hard on her. Cause she so doesn't need that.
Now, I do have one little quibble: There was no point arguing that point. this line bugs me. The use of 'point' twice just makes the sentence odd to me. Maybe using the word 'reason' for the first 'point' it wouldn't be so jarring.
Otherwise, I absolutely loved this and I can't wait for more. I'll try not to bug you too much for updates, but I will still bug for them.
LenAuthor's Response: Of course she's regretting it because she's finally maturing enough to realise how lucky she was to have a boy like Finn in her life. And while Finn is not dating anyone currently, whose to say he's going to pull her into his arms the moment they run into each other. This is me we're talking here... has there been a moment that I've made anything easy on Molly and Finn's relationship for them? Just think about that ;)
Well, Percy will be Percy, as they say. But he will come to terms throughout the summer to come that his little girl has grown up and that he can't control her anymore, or even try to control her. But expect some minor head-butting because with both of their personalities under one roof for a whole summer, well, you can be sure their stubborn egos will try one another. Molly is her father's daughter, after all.
Ooh, didn't even notice that... I'll have to go back and fix that. Thanks for "point"ing that out. hahah, no? Not a good pun, uh? I'll work on it.
Thanks so much for the review and I hope you enjoy the next chapter when you review and let me know what you think in a review in that chapter. I'll hopefully be finished with chapter three in the next day or so and have it posted up, so you'll soon have two chapters to read and post reviews for if you don't jump on this one soon. :) Thanks again! Hope you continue to enjoy where I take this story... I have big ideas and even more since I discussed what I had so far with you. Report Review
Alright Lee, as promised, I'm here to review your chapter. and yay! I'm still going to be the first one.
I loved it. Though, I will say it was a bit repetitive when they explained things once at the ministry and then again at home. I still loved it, but sort of skimmed over them telling the story a second time.
Why do I not trust Logan? He grabs the amulet and all I'm thinking is "when is the shoe gonna drop?" which just makes me sound paranoid. I know you have more planned, and I'm really looking forward to it.
Dean on a broom was funny as hell. He'll never be able to live that one down. Lol
Can't wait for more!Author's Response: Yay! Thank you Len! Yup, still first.
Glad you enjoyed it! And yeah, I figured it would be but I just felt that it had to be written.
Logan? He did not grab it. Your thinking of Alex, Gov of Magical Texas. And not really much more planned for this story. The next chapter will be the last.
Hehe, glad you liked that part. And you are correct, never going to live that down :P Thanks so much for the review! Report Review
Another excellent chapter. I'm getting more and more intrigued by this little tale of yours. Hollis can't possible hate Alice because of the train ride first year. I do hope we find out why they are rivals.
Of course, I also hope that Hollis gets over her 'i can't talk to Fred properly' issues before he dies...that is, if you are following the books. I didn't really look to see if this was listed as AU.
Excellent third chapter.Author's Response: Oh, but Hollis does hate Alice because of the train ride in their first year! This just goes to show the pettiness with some teenage girls, and rivalry for the sake of rivalry, and hating people without remembering how the hatred originated. Hollis's dislike of Alice lacks a proper foundation, but it's definitely mutual. You see, Alice and Hollis have too much fun disliking each other to give it up. ^ ^
And no, this fic is not AU.
Thank you for reading! Report Review
Haha I love how older siblings are when it comes to the younger generation. My favourite line in this chapter is by far the one about them having to swim to reach Hogwarts at the bottom of the lake. It made me giggle.
Of course, I'm also going to assume that Hollis was talking to George just then when she left the compartment. Because I'm also assuming it was Fred who helped her out earlier in the chapter. Of course, I could be completely wrong and have them backwards. But, I can see how Hollis, being a first year, wouldn't know about the twins just yet.
I rather liked this chapter, and plan to read more before the month is out.
(from the TGS Review exchange)Author's Response: Delphine is a very silly character, and definitely gullible. And you're right - it was Fred who was standing against the door and holding Delphine inside, and it was George later in the corridor. And at this point, Hollis has no idea that they aren't the same person. :) Report Review
I don't plan on going anywhere until you finish this! And even then, I'm still going to stalk you! lol
I loved it. Was completely blown away by the fact that Anna's mom isn't dead. Honestly, I was not expecting that in the slightest. I would not have imagined Amelia would fake her own death, but some how I sort of see Anna's grandfather having his hand in that.
I'm still not sure who Anna should be with. I rather like Draco/Anna, but I really like Anna/Blaise. But gah! You make it so hard to choose one over the other.
I can't wait to see where you are going with this. Promise you won't make me wait another year for an update?
LenAuthor's Response: Len!
Would you believe I composed a very tasteful response and I get an error message :/. Anyway, here's part two.
You're probably my most loyal (read:only) reader for this novel, and for that I really appreciate all your support. Yes, I know very well you'll stalk me, and probably bug me until I finish it :p
I couldn't leave Anna an orphan. The girl deserves at least one parent in her life. I wanted to try my hand at some dramatic irony here too, so that no one else knows she's alive. *insertevillaughhere* You'll also find that this chapter is a turning point for things to go 'pear-shaped'. Plot twists will come at you fast, and at the end I really hope you don't kill me (if you do, you'll never know how this story ends!)
I'm trying to keep Anna's relationship with Blaise as platonic as possible. Blaise is, by nature, a flirt, and at the moment he is quite content with Miss Greengrass. However, you'll find out who's the third side in this love triangle of doom soon enough. I still haven't decided who she'll end up with, if anyone at all. But we shall see.
You won't have to wait another year for an update. Hopefully I'll put up the other chapter before the queue closes (or sooner).
I really appreciate you reviewing this chapter, Len!
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