Reading Reviews From Member: toomanycurls
  
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Review #1, by toomanycurlsTo Prevent An Unfortunate Series of Events : Secrets, secrets are no fun. Secrets, secrets hurt someone.

22nd April 2015:
SUCH A DRAMATIC CHAPTER!!

I don't think I've mentioned before but your details are really great. I love how well visualized each location and person is. I've never been able to write with that kind of precision and I'm a bit jealous of your eye for detail.

Onto some drama - I cannot believe that Dorea just read Hermione like that. I mean, I can and it's not too much of a surprise that Harry's grandma is a powerful witch but wow. It does make sense given her love and feelings of protection over Sirius that she would suss out anyone who seemed off.

Next bit of drama - I was worried that Sirius would completely fly off the edge with overhearing Hermione's true past. I'm glad that he was reasonable enough to listen to Hermione because I would have been very angry if they broke up unnecessarily (because they wouldn't sit down and talk). I was also worried that Hermione wouldn't open up and cause another reason for them to part ways on bad terms. Sirius took the news of everything pretty well. It's interesting that she didn't reveal Peter's betrayal but she still said not to use his as Secret Keeper. I feel like Sirius will see through that.

I love that they had sexy time and cracked up at James' reaction.

Dorea's apology seemed out of place. I mean, she didn't do that by accident so why not stand by her decision?

Hermione's gift to Sirius is really sweet. In the end, I'll be very interested to see if Sirius lives and how his love life turns out. I haven't looked to see if this is complete but if it's not you better keep working on it.

Thanks for the swap!
-Rose

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Review #2, by toomanycurlsRace Against Time : Chapter 2

20th April 2015:
Meg!

I love this chapter and your characterism of Remus and Dumbledore (and how true they are to canon). Emmeline is really coming to life through your writing.

I also really love that Sirius' escape was the catalyst for Remus getting the DADA job. His hesitation was dead on and I wanted to clap at Dumbledore's frustration at his stubbornness. Emmeline sounds like quite a good auror based on her thoughtfulness. Dumbledore not telling them about the protection is typical (and frustrating).

So, this hit me last chapter but I forgot to say something - but I'm curious why Emmeline wasn't introduced to Harry as an Auror (Mad Eye, Kingsley, and Tonks were pointed out as aurors so I'm curious why Emmeline wasn't). Anyway, back to the chapter.

The explanation of why Remus was on the train is great. I mean, it's always kind of bothered me and your explanation makes so much sense. I can't blame them for keep going back to how Sirius escaped. It must be an all-consuming thought for them as it was assumed to be impossible.

I'm excited to see Emmeline stay involved through the year. :D

-Rose

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Review #3, by toomanycurlsA Christmas in Azkaban: A Flickering Flame

10th April 2015:
Hello!!

I really enjoyed your take on Sirius in Azkaban. I'm not sure if you've read The Count of Monte Cristo but the annual auror visit reminded me of the annual beating Edmond recieved at the Chateau d'if to mark the passing of each year. I imagine a verbal assault like the aurors gave him were a bit worse than a physical assault only because the words and feelings stay with people longer in Azkaban. I did think their taunts about his mother dying were unnecessarily mean (though, at least he learned that she died). It does explain how he knew stuff when he got out of prison.

The Christmas memory was so bittersweet. I imagine any sort of happiness, even momentary, would cause the dementors to swarm on someone. It's sweet that, despite having the dementors take it away afterwards, Sirius enjoyed and sought out happy memories from time to time.

Great one shot!

-Rose

Author's Response: Well, meanness was what they were going for, after all. And yeah, I'd love to have everyone think I'm a master planner weaving those details together...but I honestly didn't think about that until after it had been written. I knew they'd both died while he was in Azkaban, but we didn't know when. His mother is implied to have died soon after his imprisonment considering how dirty it was when we're first introduced to the House of Black, but she could have just as easily been senile and Kretcher just not doing anything. Honestly, I could very easily picture that.

Yeah, bittersweet happens to be one of my specialties.

Thanks for the review!


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Review #4, by toomanycurlsBetween the Lines: Any-way-what-how

9th April 2015:
Love.

I feel most of my reviews on your stuff could be summarized by that word.

I would be terrified to write about Minerva as a young girl but you jumped in and made her so believable. I'm glad you didn't make her as rigid as she is as an adult but she seems very realistic. I love how smart and self-taught Minerva is. I really liked her reaction to the mean nickname (in that it did kind of unnerve her). I could see that happening to someone as heated as we see Minerva in the books but before she's really mastered being calm, cool, an collected (generally).

Amelia - oh how i adore her. I love that she didn't stand for the bullying but she didn't let Minerva stoop to hexing people in the hallways. She did a great job at difusing the hurt feelings Minerva had.

What I really like about this is how the chapter makes me feel. I love the budding friendship, sense of victory over Billius (Wealsey?!??!) and his immature antics, and something along the lines of a thrill of exhileration at being young girls. I got the feeling that Amelia knew who Minerva was much more than Minerva had been aware of her.

Excellent chapter!!

-Rose

Author's Response: Aaah! Rose. I can't even with your reviews. Oh, my. I'm so, so glad that I did Minerva justice. This story has been knocking around in my head for ages and the logophile's challenge sort of hit me over the head with the word "ameliorate" and I took it as a sign and hammered out the first chapter.

Yes! It is Bilius Weasley - Ron was named after his great uncle, if I recall and I ran with it :)

Amelia is much better at reading people than Minerva - and although Minerva is book-smarter than Amelia (at least a little bit), she has a lot of growing to do in the area of personal relationships.

Thanks again Rose - ah! This review was awesome!

♥ Beth


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Review #5, by toomanycurlsTo Prevent An Unfortunate Series of Events : Peter Pettigrew's Potential Problem

9th April 2015:
Meg!!!

I love that Hermione schemed to get all of them at the Christmas party together. She had the same idea for her and Harry going together so I'm not surprised she thought of that with this group. It's always nice to have the thoughtful, inclusive friend.

Wow, Lily's dress is quite the JLO style item. Both Lily and Hermione donned quite provacative dresses for the party. I think the guys should have worn revealing dress robes. Hey, equality is equality. :P

haha, I love that James and Sirius went arm in arm together. Their personalities make me laugh so much.

I like your commentary on Sluggy here - I mean, it's an awful way to treat people (like the either matter or don't). I'm not sure if the treatment is worse for Peter or Remus - neither are swimming in conidence.

Oh wow, it's surreal to see Snape bully Peter into betraying his friends. I am curious what made Snape seek out Peter (and I have to comment/ask how Snape didn't suspect Peter over Sirius if he knows Peter goes on to spy for Voldemort). I'm not sure it would be quite the same dishonor for Hermione to approach them with facts about Peter talking to Snape about joining the death eaters.

Aw, it sounds like Sirius is a bit worried about losing Hermione. Her behavior must seem quite erratic towards him.

Poor Remus - it's not fair that his friends outted his condition (though Hermione already knows). Lily is so sweet to Remus and his reaction got me all emotional too. haha, Hermione is quite the actress here. Being upset that Sirius didn't tell her something she knew but he didn't know she knew. :P that's great. I do hope Peter also feels like they're his brothers. *sigh*

Great chapter!
-Rose

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Review #6, by toomanycurlsRace Against Time : Chapter 1

9th April 2015:
I read this last night before I dozed off and I'm so happy you're writing this for NaNo. I'M ALSO SO TERRIFIED ABOUT WHAT YOU'LL DO TO MY EMOTIONS.

Okay - I find it interesting that Emmeline got over Sirius but still never dated anyone else. I mean, in what way is that getting over someone?!!? I guess that I get she was emotionall scarred and didn't want to open herself up to anyone. Still, in my head, there was some post war luvin' for Emmeline.

I love hte contrast between a normal, quiet morning and then the shock of seeing Sirius had escaped from Azkaban. Her reaction definitely makes me think she has some post traumatic stress going on. I kind of wonder if the Ministry will get suspsicious of Emmeline as she took the morning off the day her ex broke out from prison. I know it's been years and she's an auror, but police tend to look to the last known relationship when someone is on the run.

Ooh, your depiction of Remus is quite dark. At least, having him as an alcoholic slob is interesting. I love that, despite not seeing each other for years, Emmeline just busts into Remus' place and wakes him up because the person they were both extremely close to is on the run. On my second read through, I definitely feel like Emmeline is questioning Remus about Sirius' escape (like making sure he didn't have anything to do with it). Their synchronisity at deciding to go to Dumbledore was brilliant (and hilarious).

um, post more of this soon. or else.

-Rose

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Review #7, by toomanycurlsSaving Severus Snape : vii.

31st March 2015:
Meg!!!

I love the information Hermione gets from the time travel book, basically giving her free reign to interact with an attitude that she's meant to be there. It's kind of mind-blowing to think about the time travel paradox for too long (so I won't :P) but I like how you wrapped that up so Hermione doesn't have to keep worrying about it.

Remus and Hermione's chat is so so so adorable. I do love the young, carefree Remus you have in the chapter. Then again, it makes me sad to compare him to the extremely broken and weary man that we see in OotP and HBP. :'( I did get the feeling in OotP that Sirius perhaps knew Amelia kind of well which would have happened if she and Remus dated. Amelia's reaction to Hermione's friendly gossip is sweet. I'm really excited to have them explore some sort of relationship together.

Man, Rita is quite the nosey person. Her passion for news and gossip is quite evident even as a teenager. I wonder if she'll keep prying after this (probably) and if that'll get Hermione into any sticky situations.

DADA had me laughing with Hermione trying not to be bored and not master the spell too fast. At least she was able to impress Snape in the lesson. I wonder how long it'll take them to have meaningful contact. I really admire how different you're able make your characterizations of Hermione and her relationships with various students. I can't keep diverse characterization of the same person in my head (or writing).

Great chapter!!

-Rose

Author's Response: Hey Rose! I've finally answered all your reviews from this story! *throws confetti* I'm sorry I've taken forever with them.

We'll probably be seeing that book again at some point (or points), but at least it will ease her mind for now - kind of. Yeah, it makes my head hurt if I try to think about it too long, so I know what you mean there.

It makes me so sad that they're so easily becoming friends, but honestly, I can't see them not getting along. I just really love exploring the idea of the young Remus, who is still fun, hopefully and full of life. I'm really glad that you like him here. :) I thought so, too - about Sirius. I can't wait to write more Amelia and Reums! :D

Rita is awful. Just horrible. But I love writing her. She's going to be a complete thorn in Hermione's side.

That DADA class took FOREVER for me to write. It's the reason this chapter took so long. You have no idea how happy I am to hear you say that you liked it! As for their meaningful contact... Well, you might not be waiting too much longer at all. *I'm just going to set that down right there and walk away slowly*

Gah! Thank you! I'm trying to keep her more in character in this fic, as opposed to the other one. Which is probably why I haven't touched the other on in nearly eight months. But thank you so much!! ♥

I'm so sorry for the amount of time I've taken to respond! I hope I've answered all of your questions (that I could answer at this point). I'm so super thrilled that you're enjoying this and I hope that you continue to for the rest of the story! ♥ ♥

Hugs,
Meg


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Review #8, by toomanycurlsTo Prevent An Unfortunate Series of Events : No more fooling around.

27th March 2015:
Meg!!

I felt like quite a bit happened in this chapter. Seeing Hermione and Sirius flirt was very sweet and not at all out of character. I mean, it's natural for their physical relationship (and flirtation) to progress. I imagine Hermione thinks it is unlike her because this is her first relationship that has lasted this long.

It does seem that the last month has allowed Hermione to not face the stress of her assignment or grieve from the battle. Everyone's panic about her passing out really shows their attachment to her. Sirius' concern is especially sweet. It's also nice that they didn't dig deep on the reason for Hermione's stress-isode. I wish we could see a bit more about what made Hermione stand out from the other women Sirius dated before.

The meeting with Dumbledore was so dramatic (emotionally). It's very sad that Hermione will have to chose between her two futures. Fetching the diadem was quite eventful though Snape's attack was out of hte blue. I'll be interested to see if this has impacts down the road. Anyway, Dumbledore's plan to tackle the horcruxes sounds rather solid. I am curious though if the one in the cave is there yet. I mean, I got the feeling that he was placing it when he and Kreacher went to go to the cave together.

I think Hermione's plan to befriend Peter will help out. I'm not surprised that it didn't take much to make Peter feel more included and valued. Christmas should be exciting!! I'm excited for it.

-Rose

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Review #9, by toomanycurlsBunny Slippers: Kingsley

26th March 2015:
I've been watching some emotional cop-type shows with scenes similar to this and this chapter hit me hard (like the last one). I can't believe you keep doing this to me. You're showing such amazing breadth with this story - between the loving family, horrific torture and death scene, followed by the mystery and dread of Kingsley finding the Longbottoms.

The tone in this chapter was amazing with Kingsley going on a standard assigment. His recollections of the Longbottoms show a very thoughtful young auror. It seems like he quite admired them and his reaction to their injury and son's death follows that respect. Alice's dementia is another extremely well written part of this chapter.

Augusta showing up was devastating (for me and her). I feel as if there was no good way for her to find out and having Neville to hold onto had to be something of a comfort.

I felt horrible about Kingsley breaking up with Kiara. It seems understandable (especially at first because I was thinking it didn't sit right for Kingsley to eventually be married) but kind of sudden. He's definitely reacting violently to what he saw that day and it makes sense to have that reverberate into his relationship.

You've put forth another amazing chapter!

-Rose

Author's Response: Hi Rose!

I'm sorry for making you emotional, but I am happy to hear that the story is causing you to feel something. I was a bit worried when I wrote this that it would just be too much, but so far the response has been good.

The tone of this chapter was hard for me. I re-wrote the entire thing several times because it kept coming out super rushed. I've finally kind of settled on this place where I'm happy with it. I feel like Kingsley is the type of person who would be very detail oriented, so the idea that he paid attention in training seemed natural to me.

I played a lot with how Augusta would find out. I wrote one version where Kingsley went to her house to bring her Neville and tell her what transpired, but I feel like her walking in and her reaction is a bit more personal. She is always the strong, fierce woman throughout the story, so I thought it was important to give her a flash of vulnerability.

I wanted Kingsley ending his relationship to feel sudden on purpose. I hoped that it would almost come off a bit rushed and frenetic because at that point in the story, I imagine Kingsley's mind is whirring away with all sorts of horrible thoughts.

Thank you so much for reading and reviewing!

~Kaitlin


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Review #10, by toomanycurlsThe Crofter and the Snake: The Beginning of the Year

25th March 2015:
Hi Vicki,

I've always been interested in reading a story about school during DH. I like the POV you're doing. Tracey's perspective in this is very interesting as a Slytherin who is also not all into the pureblood mania. It makes sense that not all Slytherins are crazy purebloods. Her observations hit me so hard throughout the chapter about having so many students gone from each house. I'm also sad for the first years who had to learn about Hogwarts through this reimagined nightmare.

Tracey is able to empathize quite well with the new students, especially Howard. I imagine Hogwarts would have seemed odd for a 7th year student but it's too bad he didn't know the previous weird Hogwarts.

I appreciate Tracey's pull between being kind to Howard and not getting on the wrong side of the Slytherins. I think Tracey is a bit too hard on herself when it comes to smalltalk with a new person, especially when a slightly more realistic conversaton would be so dangerous. I'm a bit interested in their project for Herbology. I enjoy the way you describe classes, it's paced well and doesn't drag on either.

Oh poor Howe, trying to figure out interhouse weirdness. I'm glad Tracey could explain it in a way that wasn't horribly awkward. Ernie will make an annoying but likely helpful partner. Howe is a very likeable guy. I can't help but imagine that his friendship with muggles will make this year extremely difficult.

The muggle studies class sounds as horrible as I've imagined it would be. If it's disturbing for Tracey to sit through the indoctrination, I can't imagine how it is for someone like Howard.

I feel like I"m getting redundant but I love the conversation between Tracey and Howe - while Tracey is certainly not like the other purebloods but she does have a touch of judgemental thinking with Howard's desire to be a crofter. I'm happy they'll keep meeting before class.

I get Howe's desire to stay out of the Dumbledore's Army but it doesn't seem like he's completely uninolved with his request to Tracey for information about upcoming stuff she hears about.

oh no - I didn't think the essay would go well but I'm so nervous about the Carrows coming down on either of them. Pansy and Millicent are horrible (which isn't a surprise). It certainly seems like Tracey has more feelings for Howe than she is admitting. I'm so very impressed with the way Howe got out of hurting the students and getting them out of detention.

I'm really enjoying this story so far! Thank you for swapping with me.

-Rose

Author's Response: Hi, Rose,

Thanks for reviewing so promptly, and I'm glad you chose this story because it is one of my more unloved stories (I say that because it has the highest fall-off in reads between Chapter 1 and Chapter 2 of any of my stories, although I don't know why). But I like it.

It arose from a Missing Moments (Hogwarts in 1997-1998) class that I took on another website, during which I focused on writing about the "transfer students" in the exercises for that class, and the final exam for that class was my story "Greenhouse Seven", which contains more description of the four students' project for Herbology, if you are curious about it.

This present story, inspired by "Greenhouse Seven", was written for a love story challenge, but I rarely write love stories, and if I do, I like to present a lot of action that would show each character's moral qualities, to establish why each person is worthy of being loved (other than being drop-dead handsome or beautiful). All your observations about this plot are right on track. I also enjoy reading stories about school during DH, some of which make the place sound more terrible than I wrote it, but, Dumbledore's Army aside, there must have been a fair number of students who just tried to keep their heads down and avoid drawing attention to themselves, getting through the year in a self-preservation mode.

I hope you will enjoy the second chapter also. It is something that I have never seen written before. Let me know. I really appreciate this review. Thanks very much.

Vicki


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Review #11, by toomanycurlsTo Prevent An Unfortunate Series of Events : Hogsmeade

25th March 2015:
Oh boy. This chapter was quite the will they/won't they. I liked that Sirius laid off other girls and he and Hermione were able to be friends. I do like that Hermione had plenty of time to sort out her thoughts and feelings. It would be nice to have seen an expanded view of Hermione and Sirius as friends to get a good feeling what Lily saw when she thought they were perfect together. Hermeione's comparison between Lily and Ginny was quite interesting - I'm part glad and sad that Hermione prefers Lily's company.

I wonder if Sirius' "worth the wait" comment is a bit prophetic. Just a thought.

I got a bit choked up when they toasted to Hermione. It's very sweet. Then I was kind of laughing at Hermione telling them all about her first year adventures. I mean, she doesn't strike me as the bragging type but I enjoyed the effect it had on the group.

Dude. James and the walking in. I'm glad Harry grew up with a bit more sense than his father. At first I thought they were going to have another "let's just be friends/I'll lay off" talk and I was going to shake someone. I'm glad they moved forward even though it is scary for Hermione.

I'm interested to see how you throw a wrench in this now.

-Rose

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Review #12, by toomanycurlsBunny Slippers: The Longbottom Family

25th March 2015:
Hello!! Thank you so much for doing a review swap.

Two paragraphs in and the connection between Neville and Alice both wearing bunny slippers just hit me hard. Quite hard, darnit. O.O Neville has an older brother??!? I'm not surprised by this given your profession but the food descriptions in this are amazing. I mean, it's not so much that it reads as excessive but it got me wanting to have some of their food. Benjamin's show of magial ability is so touching and cute for someone his age.

nonononono - I don't think you could have shown a more picturesque view of the Longbottoms before having the Death Eaters break in. I'm almost more curious about what happens to Benjamin because I know (longterm) what happens to Alice, Frank, and Neville.

This is all so horrible and I'm getting emotional over it. I never really thought about it but they are torturing them for information that can't be given - it's like Frank said, Voldemort is dead-ish. Alice's maternal instincts are really hitting me. Oh how I wish they could all walk away unharmed. Benjamin was so brave trying to help his parents and you made his death so heartbreaking. :( :(

I'm all full of feels after this - quite amazing work!

-Rose

Author's Response: Hi Rose,

Yeah the bunny slippers thing was tough. And so was killing off the older brother. He was the first OC I've ever created, so it was a bit sad to see him go.

I would hope the food descriptions would be good, since that seems to be what my life revolves around! I tried really hard to think about how it would be if I was standing in the room.

The picturesque dinner followed by horrible torture was important to me. I wanted to show just how horrible the Death Eaters are.

I'm sorry that this made you emotional. It is pretty awful to imagine being tortured for information that you don't have. Even worse when it results in the loss of a child! It was hard to kill Benjamin off since he was my first OC ever, but it had to be done.

Thank you for the review swap!

~Kaitlin


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Review #13, by toomanycurlsDark Winds: Prologue: Dementors

21st March 2015:
I'm very excited about this story!! An AU with Sirius being innocent kind of hits my feels right off.

Reading a chapter focused on Fudge was very interesting. I feel like we learned so much about him and how it was to be Minister. Sirius being let go was quite the chain reaction with the dementors rioting and the general uproar. The road to minister of magic had to be difficult coming from a half blood family. Fudge's perception that Dumbledore was waiting in the wings is definitely true to how paranoid Fudge is about Dumbeldore later on in the series. It kind of makes me laugh at how Fudge interprets Dumbledore - not just the paranoia but his misunderstanding of the help.

I'm a bit mad at Fudge for trying to get Dumbledore to not hire (or fire) Remus. And I'm not surprised Umbridge was part of his effort to do that. It's even more frustrating for Fudge to call Dumbledore a muggle lover - I mean, he's half blood so it's not like he can really look down on muggles.

I particularly enjoyed your conversation between the two ministers. You captured something about the conversation we saw in HBP - perhaps the briskness and non-understanding of the two politicians of the other's world. I'm kind of leery of how much Fudge dwell's on Lucius' opinion. well... that conversation ended a bit more sour than I expected. And I'm back to uneasy with Fudge and Lucius trotting off for a midday meeting.

Great start! This story sounds great.

-Rose

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Review #14, by toomanycurlsTo Prevent An Unfortunate Series of Events : These Foolish Games

21st March 2015:
Meg!!

I'm a bit surprised Hermione and Sirius are both so heart broken the next day. They're acting like they made out and regretted it or something. I do think Hermione deserved to give him distance afterwards, he was being forward and very pushy. I am glad she opened up a bit to Lily about her apprehension to date Sirius.

Lily saying yes to James was adorable. I wonder if Hermione and Sirius' relationship-thing put a mirror in front of her regarding her attitude towards James. Sirius' reaction made me laugh the most. Oh dear, Hermione was hit hard by the feels there. :(

Remus giving relationship advice... I'm judging him based mainly on my own headcanon for him but still. He's always so wise with his words but horrible iwth execution of his own advice.

I'm mostly not surprised Sirius tried to make Hermione jealous. The dramatic teenager in me would have loved to see that relationship go on a bit for some good and painful angst. I'm a bit hopeful about this promise for them to just be friends.

It'll be interesting to see how Hermione's information sharing unfolds in the future. I wonder if he'll act on the information or decide it is too risky. I do love Dumbledore's advice - very like him to encourage relationships and romance. :D

Thanks for swapping!

-Rose

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Review #15, by toomanycurlsgoodbye good friend: What We Talk About When We Talk about Death

16th March 2015:
Joey!

Wow, what a heavy piece. I'm struggling to think of the right things to say but I'll give this my best try. Death is such a difficult topic at any age but especially so for young adults when they're at the point of just coming into life and have so much of it to look forward to. The shock felt by the characters came through very well. I really get not wanting to identify their friend as the dead person and using the term body instead. I feel that's quite common with death and not wanting to view the essense of a person as gone because their body has stopped moving.

James confesion about struggling with depression and contemplating suicide is gut wrenching. I have to admire the bravery at admitting that but I was also sad that his closest friends did not know already. I like that you didn't give this a definitive "here's what happened to Willow and here's what they did afterwards" feel. It's brief and harsh, much like death.

Thank you so much for doing a swap with me. *hug*

-Rose

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Review #16, by toomanycurlsThe Awful Sound of Nothing: The Awful Sound of Nothing

15th March 2015:
Hello!

I'm here for the BvB and am so glad you wrote this story. I feel a bit bad for Rodolphus and the way his love life has turned out. That's not something I ever thought I would say or think so kudos to you for making it happen. I kind of felt like he didn't have a chance once Bellatrix met Voldemort and they way you wrote her attraction to Voldemort yet marriage to Rodolphus was very similiar to how I've imagined it (though I've only vaguely put some thoughts together).

I wasn't sure (because my details on which death eaters went to jail when are fuzzy) if this was after the battle in the department of mystery or the end of the wizarding war. I love how Rodolphus was confounded that a simple housewife could defeat Bellatrix. I mean, he definitely saw aurors as equals but Molly Weasley was a surprise.

Excellent piece!!

-Rose

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Review #17, by toomanycurlsPitch Black Night: Chapter 1

15th March 2015:
Phew. Sorry about that wait. I had half the review written when my browser on my phone refreshed and I lost everything.

You've touched on three things I love in FF: wolfstar (one of my favorite ships), Remus and Sirius (two of my favorite characters), and the second person POV. Reading this I woudn't have guessed that this was your first time writing Remus and Sirius because they really came through well. Sirius' boldness at going out to the Shrieking Shack paired with his shyness at revealing his true feelings were perfectly paired together. Remus' language was remarkable as was his reaction to seeing Sirius put himself in danger. I love that Remus didn't jump to the "oh it's because you love me" conclusion and that Sirius had to say it explicitly. I mean, Remus is a bit slow when it comes to accepting love (in my head at least) and Sirius is a bit of an idiot when it comes to expressing his feelings. I love watching them both grapple with this new proclamation.

The descriptions in this are fantastic. I enjoyed the way you describe sneaking out of hte castle (and how you really painted a detailed picture as Sirius headed out) as well as detailing what it felt like to transform.

Thanks so much for swapping with me! I quite enjoyed this.

-Rose

Author's Response: Hi Rose!

No worries on the wait! That happens to me from time to time!

So we're starting out good if you like Wolfstar, Remus & Sirius, and 2nd person POV. I honestly did struggle a bit writing this because I didn't want to stereotype either of them. You're right that usually serious is portrayed as cocky, but I don't know a single person who isn't nervous when they admit their in love for the first time.

As for Remus, we know from the books that he has some self esteem issues. Tonks is practically throwing herself at him, but he seems oblivious. I figured if it had been Sirius instead, he still would've been equally as oblivious.

The descriptions were fun to write in this. I literally closed my eyes and tried to imagine how I would see them...and then find a way to describe it!

Thank you so much for the review!

~Kaitlin


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Review #18, by toomanycurlsThinking Out Loud: Thinking Out Loud

14th March 2015:
Hello!!!

I don't get my hands on may Hermione/George stories, even in the queue. Most of them don't show them married so that was especially exciting in this. You've really pinpointed where Hermione could have great compatability with George with a slight bend from either one of them.

Their wedding sounds ideal. I love how picturesque and magical it sounds without mimicking Bill and Fleur's wedding. I kind of have the ballroom from Beauty and the Beast in my head when they dance - all romance and perfection.

George and Hermione have perfect banter together. They feel effortless and relaxed with each other. Somehow you've given them the shyness of their wedding night/reception with the sexiness of familarity. I think they are pulling the best out of each other which is lovely. I especially liked the 'i love you and i like you' phrase as the two don't always go together.

I love the ease at which you brought the story ahead many years to the future when they are old. George's reminiscing is especially touching for me as even just three years past my wedding I get quite sentimental looking at photos of my husband and I. Hermione's assumption that George views her beauty as diminishing made me laugh. Their romance still seems fresh and alive which is so sweet after this many years of marriage.

This is so sweet and delicous - I really enjoyed reading this. Thanks for swapping.

-Rose

Author's Response: Rose,

I'm glad you gave a Hermione/George story a try, especially since they really are an underrated pairing. I love them together, because I think the twins were the best match for Hermione's intelligence and wit in the books. I've always loved the thought of them all being super smart, but in different ways so that she can bring out a more serious side in the twins and the twins can help Hermione to loosen up a bit.

Anyway, thank you for reviewing! I'm glad that you understood the sweetness I was trying to bring to the story. I wanted to translate a relationship that had started out as a strong friendship into a romance. I think that's when you get the nicest moments in a fic; when you can tell two characters mesh outside of their passion.

Thank you again! :)
Amanda


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Review #19, by toomanycurlsTo Prevent An Unfortunate Series of Events : The Inevitable Breakdown

14th March 2015:
Hi Meg!

ooh, I forgot to talk about Hermione's plan to write to Dumbledore in my last review. I love that she's doing that but I'm not sure Dumbledore will let Hermione share information about the future. I kind of laughed at Hermione for thinking she was pressing Sirius too much for information when he had been so forward and intrusive (perhaps not about private information but definitely pushed her boundaries). No, wait, I wanted to hear what was wrong. well... okay. maybe it'll come out later. I feel as if his episode of him asking Hermione out is the most genuine feeling interaction between them you'e had (where Sirius doesn't just seem like some sort of over-hyped boy). that is, until she said yes. I'm kind of chagrined that he changed the terms and she's going with it. I mean, I ship them, but he's being a turd. Well, at least it kind of wears on Hermione too. I feel validated.

Aw. :( :( :( :( Hermione's "i don't belong here" just got me so sad. I mean, Lily did raise some good points with Hermione's stated feelings versus behavior and I was a bit surprised that she didn't mention Ron (I suppose things are complicated between them at the point she left). Oh dear. I just want to hug Hermione. I can't blame her for being overwhelmed by this and the future and the weight of it all. I guess if anything good comes from her outburst it is that Sirius said he'll calm down a bit.

but then, he's still a bit pushy trying to get Hermione to say how she feels about him. He's qutie insecure. Hermione blowing up at Sirius felt kind of cathartic for me. This does have to be difficult for sirius as he's getting completely mixed signals from Hermione. Ooh, Lily as matchmaker should be fun!

-Rose

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Review #20, by toomanycurlsTo Prevent An Unfortunate Series of Events : Unrelenting

14th March 2015:
Hi Meg!

o.O how can you start me off with such feels? I'm part amused and part stung that Hermione saw Lily's eyes and thought of Harry, especially so early in the morning. I got a laugh at Hermione's explanation of her friendship with Harry - way to sink Harmione :P (I don't ship them bu i don't not ship them)

Throughout the chapter I'm quite amazed at how strong Sirius comes on. I'd be quite cross with him with that behavior but I really don't like unwanted attention. It makes me go a bit hy-cha at people. I almost groaned at the idea of James and Sirius pairing up to win over Lily and Hermione. Remus and Hermione's observation that Lily loves James is a bit of a surprise. I mean, she's not letting on much. I do like that Remus is tryiing to soften Hermione up for Sirius. Part of me sees him as a good wingman in this scene and part of me thinks he's being genuine. Sirius and James seem to have a really bad idea on how to attrack girls. I think I might be showing my age with this but they just seem a bit annoying rather than charming.

Wow. Snape. I don't know if I have words for that. I loved how the Marauders stood united against Snape - it was such an awesome show of solidarity. I'm not surprised Slughorn didn't immediately try to punish Snape.

I kind of have to give Hermione the side eye at her assertion of not leading Sirius on - she's not been completely stone cold towards him (though, I do give people lessons on this). She did let him walk her to lunch (arm in arm) and was rather flirty wtih him at times. Oh well, she's struggling with her own feelings.

Hermione and lily's relationship is quite sweet. I laughed at Hermione calling her Lily Potter and Lily taking it as a bit of teasing. I'm so excited and moving onto the next chapter!!

-Rose

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Review #21, by toomanycurlsDobby: The Paid Elf: Dobby: The Paid Elf

11th March 2015:
Hi Meg!!

You've written about two of my favorite characters and I'm completely blown away by how well each of them came across. I love Dobby's innerdialouge. I feel like it's spot on for how he speaks without sounding childlike.

I feel so bad for Dobby and the rough time he's having with being free. I imagine he was close to desperate with all the rejections he had from various wizaring families. The way you set this up, it certainly seems as if meeting Dumbledore at this time was the best thing for Dobby or he would have really hit rock bottom.

Dumbledore is just fantastic as he's so kind to Dobby. I love that he remembered who Dobby was (as it would be easy to forget a house elf met a few years back) and had enough information for a pleasant exchange.

This kind of feels like reading a bit of JKR's hashed out subplots that she left out of the books. I love the way Dumbledore offers Dobby a job and really makes him feel needed (plus offering to pay). Their downwards haggling had me laughing too.

The hope you ended this one made my afternoon. I love how positive this is and uplifting. It's quite emotional and endearing.

Thanks for adding this to my headcanon.

-rose

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Review #22, by toomanycurlsBruises : Bruises

11th March 2015:
Hi Meg!!

So sorry for being incredibly late on this.

I love how you write Emmeline and Sirius' relationship - they seem quite comfortable together. I like the idea of them having a little party for Halloween but it makes me terrified for what's happening. You have a great way of capturing comfortable relationships between people. I do love Sirius' impracticality when it comes to a gift for Harry. I'm kind of curious what it was that set Emmeline on edge with Peter and why his friends didn't notice. I mean, it could be that she's distant enough from Peter to observe him objectively. It's also baffling to me that Sirius felt something was off (or just acted off) after speaking with Peter. I need more than the first person POV provides!!

Whoo! I don't know why but I'm glad that you set up Emmeline not knowing who was really the secret keeper. Ugh. I can only imagine that any gathering of the Order during the first war would have been an on-going memorial for people who recenly died. STOP IT SIRIUS! YOU'RE JUST MAKING YOURSELF LOOK GUILTY. *dies*

Oh my, poor Emmeline. This has to be horrid. It feels horrid. I want to hug her and fast foward a decade to Sirius being innocent and back with hte Order. :( :( :( Everything with the ending is just terribly sad - how can you go from the lighthearted beginning to this?!?!

Amazing!

-Rose

Author's Response: Hey Rose!! No worries! ♥ :) Thanks for doing the swap with me!!

I didn't want to make them overly lovey-dovey with one another, or have the pairing be the main focus of the story. I just wanted it to seem like a normal and comfortable relationship, so I'm really relieved to hear you say that. :)

Yeah, I did kind of choose the date purposefully. We all know what that date signifies, so I figured it would give a bit of tension to the story. I'm really hoping that came through. This was my first time really trying to write something dark.

Hahaha yeah, I couldn't not throw a little bit of humor into it, with Sirius going completely overboard on Harry like that. And in the back of his mind, know that he's also doing something for James and Lily.

As far as what put her on edge. It was mostly just his appearance and his mannerisms. That and just one of those gut feelings you get every so often that you can't really explain. You know when something just seems off, and you have no idea why? Or maybe that's just my anxiety disorder talking... Who knows haha.

I tried another thing which I never have before in this; tried to leave a few things to the reader's interpretation. Like what set Sirius off after speaking with Peter and what he whispered to James. I know what happened and what he said, but I don't think I'll ever tell. I want to leave it up to you all to decide.

I wanted to really try to keep this as canon as I could, and we know that no one except James, Lily, Sirius and Peter knew that they switched secret keepers, so Emmeline couldn't know. Oh I know what you mean! With people dying left and right, it really would be like an on-going memorial service.

Hahaha! But if he didn't make himself looks so guilty, we wouldn't have Prisoner of Azkaban!! ;)

I was almost crying writing the end of this. Just feeling how utterly alone an empty she felt, it killed me. So I totally know what you mean about wanting to hug her. I did too!

Well *grins wickedly* you just /might/ see her a decade later finding out he's innocent. *skips away whistling*

Oh I don't know... It's just a gift I suppose. :p

Aww Rose, thank you so much!! ♥ I'm super duper thrilled that you enjoyed this!! Thank you so much for the awesome review and the kind words!!! *hug*

xoxo Meg


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Review #23, by toomanycurlsWake up, Rose.: The Nightmare Before Christmas

6th March 2015:
Albus and Scorpius' argument at the beginning is weird/interesting. I'm not sure what to make of Scorpius' comment about Rose liking him enough at teh party and knowing there was a love potion involved. I kind of wonder when he figured out the love potion thing (or was it Albus telling Scorp it was a love potion). I really can't blame Rose for checking out of the day and seeking refuge in her dorm.

Roxanne! I love how you're including more cousins in the story and giving them each unique relationship to each other. Her gossip sharing is quite revealing - it's nice that she's sharing the information from a place of concern rather than being malicious. And, yeah, what she shared was somehow not a surprise to me, but quite cruel for people to be saying those things. I kind of laughed that the rumor Scorpius and Rose were dating for a few years was worse than the pregnancy rumor.

Rose's confrontation with Scorpius made me cheer a bit but I *still* feel like he needs to have a moment to say what he needs to say. Though, he kind of bungled it by starting off with 'you're not very nice' he would have gotten further without that added commentary.

One thing I like about this story is the mix of quite serious school drama and the lighthearted friendship moments between Rose and her friends. I loved their 'are we school friends' moment. I'v e never thought of that for friends but I can see how that happens. Also, I need something to happen with Hugo and the bullies. Not necessarily Rose being violent with them, but school suspension would be nice.

Dom's confrontation with Rose was weird. I mean, it's been months since the party and she's just now worried about being told on? I really don't think she and Al are sorry though.

Great chapter! I'm excited for the next one.

-Rose

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Review #24, by toomanycurlsThe Fred Weasley Memorial Scholarship: i. the plan [or] five nerds face a life of hedonism

2nd March 2015:
I'm *finally* giving this a proper read. I'm on my phone so I probably won't stop every chapter. I've never heard of a legit internship where someone has to pay. Training, sure, but people do work in an internship and are usually paid (or they're not but they typically don't pay for the pleasure of going grunt work). Love the intro and how you're writing everyone

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Review #25, by toomanycurls12 Hours: 12 Hours [or] There Are People Who Would Cause You Harm And Those Who Seek Your Undoing, But Before You Condemn Those Pitiful Souls, Be Sure Of What They're Pursuing

25th February 2015:
Joey!

I'm pretty intrigued that this story started off as a joke -that makes me quite excited to see how it goes. You should know that I got quite the laugh at albus ship-naming Scoprius and Lysander. I know we do it on the forums but it's funnier to see characters do it.

Having the second and third scene kind of book-end each other is pretty neat. Though, the 11 PM part sounds as if they've left one party and plan to have a night full of more adventures. Oh to be young like that. I'm quite interested in the Helmholtz Literary Association and what they'll do there. I liked what you said about copies (or reads) not having anything to do with quality.

What what wha- he's sending for Aurors? That Helmholtz Literary Association must have been quite wild... And I'm a bit curious about the quotes around literary associates.

Well, at least Lysander has the heebee geebees. I really like continuity between this and your other Scorpius/Lysander story. :D

Is it a maze, or a trap?!?! Curious minds need to know. They're clearly in a fight mode here but I'm anxious to see what brought it on. I really love the way you do action here - it's not overcomplicated but a lot still happens.

Ooh, so Al goes missing. Hrm.

And they found him by 8. I'm going to reorder this and read it :P I love the discombobulated style as it adds to the mystery of the story. I laughed so hard at "What is the functional purpose of that?" - Albus could be in software development.

Part of me wants to visit this madhouse. I'd probably die in there and never get out but it sounds so interesting (I also enjoyed the Winchester Mystery House so I might just like these weird things).

omgomgomg - I did *not* expect it to be her holding them hostage. I applaud the well-timed punch.

This was great - it's such a break from your usual style and I love it. Hats off to you for always stretching yourself and doing awesome things when you do.

-Rose

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