Reading Reviews From Member: Entropy
  
154 Reviews Found

Review #1, by EntropyI Hate Everything About You: I Hate Everything About You

19th May 2007:
I like this take on a Draco/Hermione relationship, though I think you could flesh this out a little more with more details, past encounters, what exactly goes on during the school day. Though the shortness is pretty much my only complaint.

Author's Response: I know, I didn't want to get to into it just because it was my first thing posted on here, but thanks for reviewing!

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Review #2, by EntropyIn Time: Seven

17th May 2007:
I should have left a review after each chapter, but that would mean waiting between chapters. I really like that this story has a happy ending, most of the Hermione/Remus time travel novels tend to end up with broken hearts on both sides. It was also an interesting but well thought out plot for the length of the story.

Author's Response: I know what you mean, reviews - especially if there is any cliffhanger between chapters - are hard to follow through with! I contemplated giving them a sad ending, but even if they don't stay together romatically I think they would always be close. :)

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Review #3, by EntropyDying to Live: Epilogue ~ Letter from the Lost Years

12th May 2007:
I really like this account of R.A.B., especially since I just don't really see Regulus Black being that person. But though the name Ruby Boleyn seems vaguely familiar, I can't seem to place her in context to anything. Nevertheless, the way you wove the letters/writing of the elderly Ruby with the accounts of her as a student was very well done.

Author's Response: Aw, thank you so much, Entropy ^^ No, I don't think RAB is Regulus at all, and as for Ruby's name... are you thinking of Henry the eight's wife, perhaps? Cheers! ~ Sam M

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Review #4, by EntropyDying to Live: Prologue ~ You

12th May 2007:
I like how Myrtle is in this story, and the style really makes me want to continue reading, which I will. ; )

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Review #5, by EntropySaying Goodbye: Saying Goodbye

11th May 2007:
I really like how you manage to both humanize Lucius, but still remain true to his rather twistedly driven character. Very nicely written.

Author's Response: I think I sat and wrote this entire story in one sitting due to having it sent in on time for the contest submissions. I enjoyed writing this story very much, it was a nice departure from my regular fics.

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Review #6, by EntropySee if You're Human After All: Running into Malfoy

17th February 2007:
I liked the matter-of-factness of the ending of this, seems very Hermione. Very sad however, please excuse me to my tissue box...

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Review #7, by EntropySee if You're Human After All: What's in a Name?

17th February 2007:
I really like this, I seem to like seriousness and humor at the same time, so this is perfect. I like your characterization, especially with all the teenage drama and not wanting to hurt other people's feelings.

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Review #8, by EntropyRain Dance: Rain Dance

16th February 2007:
That's a really cute story, nicely written.

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Review #9, by EntropyPersephone: One-shot

15th February 2007:
This was really well done, and I think it's cool how you related it to the Greek myth. Since I've been very little I have been obsessed with Greek myths and have read every version I've been able to get my hands on. But anyways, I liked how this story took time to develop, unlike the stories where Hermione and Draco do a complete turn around in a space of ten minutes.

Author's Response: Haha, we have the Greek myth obsession in common! I've loved those timeless tales since fourth grade haha. I'm glad you thought that it didn't move too fast, as I always find that a small problem with Draco/Hermione stories and worked hard to make it real and canon.

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Review #10, by EntropySaying Goodbye: Saying Goodbye

25th November 2006:
That was a wonderfully written and heart-wrenching story.

Author's Response: Thank you! I'm glad you liked it! :)

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Review #11, by EntropyI'm With You: I'm With You

7th November 2006:
Very nicely done, including all that history without making Draco too out of character. Also very powerful and sweet.

Author's Response: Awww... wow! What a great review! I love it! Yeah, I was worried he would be too OOC... I'm thrilled you enjoyed it! :-D

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Review #12, by EntropyStayer of His Hand: Say My Name

4th November 2006:
This is a very enticing story. Forgive me for not leaving more reviews along the way, I just picked this story up and was too excited to get on to the next chapter. I think you are doing a very nice job of keeping these two in character, and weaving the story in with Rowling's HBP.

Author's Response: Thanks! It's quite okay that you haven't left them all along, but thank you so much for this one. I'm glad you think I'm doing such a good job, and I'll try to get the next chapter up soon.

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Review #13, by EntropyHarry Potter and The Ever So Black Pearl: The Promotion Ceremony

26th October 2006:
What I find strange, is that Elizabeth does not make a comment about the "strange" behavior Hermione and Ginny exhibit. Culture today is a little more outgoing and not as worried about being proper. I would think Elizabeth to consider these newcomers childish and vulgar, even though there is similarity in age. And for dressing, there will be servants to help with that, and for the hair. Why not talk about how long they had to sit there waiting for their hair to be put up, and how they thought they were going to die when the laces of the corset were pulled tighter? And, someone would have had to ask them what happened to them, and how they came to be on the beach. A visit from Elizabeth's father might also happen, the host curious about his newcome and mysterious guests.

Author's Response: I guess your right. I didn't think about those things but I agree with you very much. Thanks for your input :)
~MHW


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Review #14, by EntropyHarry Potter and The Ever So Black Pearl: Port Royal

26th October 2006:
Interesting plot development, though again, short. It would also be nice to have a line between all paragraphs, including dialogue.

Author's Response: oh yeah *sheepish* I'll try and fix that in later chapters
~MHW


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Review #15, by EntropyHarry Potter and The Ever So Black Pearl: To The Granger's

26th October 2006:
I think there is room for more description and plot development. How deep is Hermione's infatuation with Ron? Vice versa? What about Harry and Ginny? What about Mrs. Granger? Does she try to engage the teens in conversation, does she have an house rules that she needs to state? Also as the very beginning of this chapter the dialogue was a little confusing as to who was speaking, that might be a good thing to go back and check. Because of the shortness, I think this might even be better tacked on to the end of the first chapter for a longer and more complete introduction.

Author's Response: ok thank you! :) I decided to make this its own chapter because I thought putting them together would be too long for the very beginning. Thanks though!
~MHW


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Review #16, by EntropyHarry Potter and The Ever So Black Pearl: Bored at The Burrow

26th October 2006:
I really like this idea, but you happen to be combining to very fun stories which makes that kind of inevitable. Maybe you were going for this effect, but I think there was a little overuse of the word bored. Use doldrums, tedium, weariness, or adjectives like uninteresting, repetitious, monotonous, flat, stale, insipid, or tiring. I also think you could come up with some more examples of things the quad has tried to do, such as cooking experiements that ended up with bad experiences, shopping, attempting to do handstands, reading books, drawing, or other random stuff they could come up with to do. It would also be nice to have a little more background information on what happened the previous school year. This doesn't seem to fit with the dark feeling that I recieved from HBP, so maybe you want to make up an alternate sixth year where nothing much happened just for the purposes of this story. This chapter also seems a little brief. I think you would do well to add a little more description here and there, to really flesh out the story. Is the summer vivid with color, and the quad just not joining in? Or is the boredom so strong that everything seems to have been leached of color? Is the couch lumpy and uneven? Is the sun shining? Are there clouds? Is the grass patchy or even and emerald green? I'm not saying that those things are what you should add, just some examples of what you could add. But explanation of seemingly unrelated or unimportant objects can help give a really clear picture of the story in the mind of the reader.

Author's Response: Wow. at first, I was a little shocked to see the critisicm in your reviews, but now I realize that I'm thankful.Thank you.
~MHW


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Review #17, by EntropyWoes of a Midget Owl: Woes of a Midget Owl

11th March 2006:
That was really nice. My favorite line was about how Pig thought Hedwig was "drop-dead gorgeous." That was great. I also really liked how you had them talk in hoots, and then translated it. Very nice job!

Author's Response: I liked that line, too. With the hoots, I was inspired by Lemony Snicket's "A Series of Unfortunate Events", where he translates Sunny's gibberish into actual words.

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Review #18, by EntropyThree Kisses and Nothing At All: - One-Shot -

8th March 2006:
I liked that. I like how you portrayed Pansy, I've never read her portrayed similarly to a sexy enchantress. And it's also nice that sometimes Hermione escapes the charms of Draco, for a little more believeable relationship (though I am a huge fan of Draco/Hermione as well).

Author's Response: Thanks for the review! There are quite a few fanfictions out there that portray her similar to how I have and those are what really gave me the idea to use her in such a way. I wanted this fanfiction to be a Hermione/Draco that was as close to canon as I could get it so Hermione just about had to be able to withstand Malfoy's charms. I'm really glad you enjoyed it :) Thanks!

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Review #19, by EntropyDoing This: Doing This

8th March 2006:
I love some of the lines in this. It put a big smile on my face. One of my favorites was "God she smells so good..." I also like the how the last line that Ron spoke echoes Harry's earlier sentiments.

Author's Response: Thank you Entropy! I'm really glad you enjoyed it, I liked that line too, this story always makes me smile so I'm glad it did the same for you! And I'm so glad you caught the line similarity... Thanks so much for the read and review! :)

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Review #20, by EntropyBroken Mirrors: Chapter One

8th March 2006:
Wow, awkward. ; ) Very nicely written, I especially liked the fight in the beginning. I would beware of overuse of ". . .", but that is my only complaint. I am currently crossing my fingers and hoping to never be caught in a similar situation.

Author's Response: Thank you very much Entropy! I'm glad you enjoyed it, ad you are right, that would be totally awkward wouldn't it? lol... and you may have a point about the "..." --- I'll definitely keep that in mind from now on as i am writing, I went back and skimmed it and I think you may be right... I didn't realize I used them so much. Thanks so much for the review! And I certainly hope to never be caught in that situation either... lol! :)

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Review #21, by EntropyUnder the Emerald Spell Light: Under the Emerald Spell Light

8th March 2006:
I have never read this pairing before, it's kind of cool. Not that this setting is exactly pleasant, but I think you carried it off quite well, and did a good job of describing the horror of the situation.

Author's Response: Thanks for the compliments and the read and the review. I think I might have run across another Irma/Argus fic before, but that was only after I thought up this one. If you like rare pairing, read my Hedwig/Pigwidgeon fic, or wait until my Crookshanks fic is validated. (And you can also read my Buckbeak fic as well). Thanks again!

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Review #22, by EntropyLittle Sister: Little Sister

8th March 2006:
You have a good start, but it seems a little sudden of a turn around from Harry being all moody about Sirius, and then making out with Ginny. Also, I wouldn't necessarily say that Harry "teases" Snape, that implies he does it in front of Snape's face, Harry more talks about him behind his back. Otherwise, nice work!

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Review #23, by EntropyBroken, Torn, Smashed: Broken, Torn, Smashed

8th March 2006:
I like the view of this, but the writing seems a little choppy. You could improve this by linking some of your sentences together into paragraphs, and by just going back through and capitalizing some "I"s that were left lowercase.

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Review #24, by EntropyCome What May: Come What May

8th March 2006:
I really like some of the internal conflict here, and how you portrayed Sirius. Though I am a little curious as to the real name of "M".

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Review #25, by EntropyFlower In The Fire: Flower In The Fire

8th March 2006:
I reallly like this take on a Draco/Hermione romance. I've never seen it from this angle, with Draco and Pansy friends, but him with Hermione. I thought it was well written, though I do think you could put some more meat into some of your descriptions.

Author's Response: Thank you for your review. I'm glad you enjoyed it!

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