Reading Reviews From Member: awesomepotter
60 Reviews Found

Review #1, by awesomepotterCygnus Black III and His Three Daughters: Andromeda

19th August 2015:
Hi! Here is your review for the Coined by Shakespeare Challenge!
I think you have the beginnings of a very interesting story here. I must admit that I've never really read a story involving Cygnus Black before, so it was nice to see a different, unusual set of characters being used here. I thought it was really lovely how you managed to create such different personalities in each of the three daughters - Bellatrix (the slightly crazed sycophant) Andromeda (the caring healer) and Narcissa (the slightly sickly, slightly wary youngest sister). I really helped to flesh out the story and make it more interesting to read, so well done on that.
I also like your very original plot idea. Like I said, I've never read a story with this group of characters before, and I've never read something with this sort of plot line before. I like how you left us on a mystery at the end of this second chapter, revealing just at the end that Charlus Potter was poisoned. Whilst it does end up leaving us with a cliffhanger (grr!) it definitely makes readers interested in the rest of the plot. I thought this was a very original plot line - so far, I can't really identify it with any of those popular fanfiction cliches we all know and love (and, although a lot of people really do love those cliches, it is always nice to see something original which will keep us guessing).
Like I said, this is a great start to a longer story, and I though it was very interesting to read/ Well done!

Author's Response: Hi, Grace. How's your life recently? I hope everything goes well for you.

I really enjoyed this challenge! I only knew a few pieces of work by Shakespeare, most of them from old BBC dramas, so I bought two books about Shakespeare before I started writing the chapter 1.

When I started writing, the plot developed into more interesting one. Stefi and Frankie helped me with beta, too. I started the story letting the trio with Ginny enter, which led me into another mystery. Blending with Laura's challenge, it turned into a big drama.

Thank you again, Grace for leaving encouraging review. I'll write the next chapter ASAP.


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Review #2, by awesomepotterAll the World's a Stage: And One Man in His Time Plays Many Parts

18th August 2015:
Hey Lizzie! Your second review for the Coined by Shakespeare challenge is here!
I thought this was such a sweet story. I love the way that Harry interacts with his kids; as we don't get to see a lot of that in the epilogue I always like to see in in people's fics. Each child has their own personality which I think you created so well - I know it can be hard to clearly define characters in a one-shot sometimes. The kids' play was so lovely to imagine in my head, too - James in Lily's wig and Albus attempting to ride the tiny broomstick are some great mental images, I tell you. It was funny to see all the influences all of Harry and Ginny's friends had had on the childrens' knowledge of the Triwizard Tournament (it took me a few minutes to work out who Vicky was, but once I did and I knew they got it from Ron it was so funny) and all the little accidents they had with the eggs and the cat made it so sweet yet so funny to read.
I like what you did with this prompt as well - it was interesting to see you take it rather literally with the idea of including a little play into the story. I also thought it was so lovely how you ended it with Harry thinking of all the things he had been in his life, none of which he really chose for himself, but then the one that he did and how much he loved it. I thought that was a really lovely way to end it and bring it back to your original prompt.
Aww, Lizzie, I loved this. It gave me lots of cuddly feels and I thought you did such a lovely job with all the characters. Well done!

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Review #3, by awesomepotterThe Clock: The Clock

18th August 2015:
Hello! Your review for the Coined by Shakespeare Challenge arrives at last!
WHY DO YOU PEOPLE DO THESE THINGS TO ME? I have read this fic four times. Every time has made me cry. Every. Single. Time. Your use of language is just phenomenal - using no dialogue and very few words at all, you have managed to create such vivid images and evoke so many emotions within both your character and your readers that I honestly don't know what to really say in this review.
The sentences convey such a graphic desciption of George's feeling of loss, of emptiness, of just being so lost without Fred that he can't work out what to do any more. I love how, although, you drop hints along the way, you only properly reveal what the subject of the story is at the very end. Until then, it becomes this real-life monster, who is responsible for ripping apart this family soullessly and without shame. Your description of the clock is so well done here.
What you've done with the prompt is amazing, too - I kinda guessed that it would be a story where a character would be about something, but I never would have imagined anything like this. What you've chosen to do is really original, but it fits so well with the prompt. This definitely wasn't what I was expecting, but I love it.
Well done. So much. I absolutely love this story - the ending, the fact that the clock declares Fred as 'Lost' - it gets me every time. I really liked reading this - well done again ;)

Author's Response: Grace! Hi!

Thanks for your review! You are much too kind! Also, thank you for starting this challenge and giving me this prompt (I know it was a random number, but whatever) because I never would have written this otherwise! I never expected it to go in this direction, either. It was literally a 2AM stroke of inspiration. So I'm glad you thought it fit well!

I am simultaneously sorry and very pleased that I made you cry. (How's that for an apology? ;))

Thanks again for your review!

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Review #4, by awesomepotterForever: Questions

17th August 2015:
Hi! Here's your review for the Coined by Shakespeare Challenge (apologies for the delay!)
I loved this. I thought you did really good job with the genre - I never would have known that romance isn't something you usually do if you hadn't said it. Generally, I'm not actually a Ron/Hermione shipper, but this actually made me support the romance in this story. Both characters remained true to how they were created, but you could see the love between them. The proposal was sone very well, too - it wasn't overly cheesy, but it was romanic and plausible. The hopeless romantic part of me has been appeased ;)
I like how you included the quote in the story, too. Generally, in normal dialogue, it wouldn't have fit too wll (that I can think of, anyway) but in the context of Ron giving his little pre-proposal speech it works very well. Your description is beautiful, too - the way you describe that bridge was, to me, just so lovely. I had some proper feels going on I think ;) your writing is just so lovely to read - it's enjoyable, interesting, and very original. I loved this, so don't think for a second that you did a bad job on the fluff/romance!
Well done!

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Review #5, by awesomepotterOnly friends: Chapter One

17th August 2015:
Hi! Here's your review for the Coined by Shakespease Challenge (I'm so sorry it's taken so long)!
I thought this was a really lovely one-shot. I do like the Hermione/Charlie pairing, and I thought you really did it justice here. Niether of the characters were at all OOC and I liked the way they interacted. I also liked the way you chose to end it, as well - sometimes it's nice not to have an ending where they do immediately want to get together - having a delay, like Charlie's story about finding the girl he wanted to propose to with someone else, creates a bit more depth to the characters by giving them a bit of a backstory, which I really liked seeing - it can be difficult to do in a shorter piece of writing, but you managed it really well here.
I liked what you did with the prompt, too - sometimes it can be hard to integrate it itno a story without it standing out and interrupting its flow. I thought you did a really good job with this one, though, and I like the interpretation you had of it. Instead of it being more like an accusation, as it was in the original text, it was used more to just turn the situation onto Charlie, and leave where it went entirely up to him. I like it when people take different interpretations of prompts, so obviously I like this - you managed to change what the words meant whilst making sure it still made sense, and I enjoyed reading this because of that.
Your description of the characters' feelings and appearances was really lovely to read - the words you used made it so vivid, and I loved reading it. Overall, I really loved reading this, and I thought you did a wonderful job with the story in response to the prompt :)
Well done!

Author's Response: Thank you! I am so glad you liked it. Sometimes when I read prompts like these I just get an idea of what type of scene I want it to be in and go from there. I tend not to focus on the original context of the quote/prompt as I find that sometimes it hinders my creativity.

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Review #6, by awesomepotterLord Banchory and Lady Ravenclaw: History Forgets

14th August 2015:
Hello there! At last, your review for the Coined by Shakespeare challenge arrives! I'm so sorry it's so late :(
LIZZIE! Why did you do this to me? Don't you know I can't handle things of an excessive feel-y nature? And then you go and do this to me? I mean, that's just rude. The bit where the Baron screams after Helena dies had me flapping my hands like a lunatic because of all the emotion in that last section. The fact that he killed the love of his life just in a moment of insanity and anger was so heartbreaking. I like the way you write Helena, though - I thought it created a very convincing and realistic character, especially when you don't get a lot to go off of from her short appearance in the last book. It would make sense that she felt bitter and jealous of the fact that her mother was always the one that was well-known and recognised, and that she would have had to live in her mother's shadow a lot. I really liked the way she was written in this.
I thought the way you worked the prompt into the story, too - sometimes these things can be difficul to get into a story without them sticking out and interrupting the flow of the story. However, I thought that it just slipped into the story seamlessly, and if I didn't know what I was looking for, I wouldn't have spotted it. I thought you did such a good job for having combined three challenges, and the characters, the storyline and the prompt all fitted really well together. It was really lovely to read, and though I'd like to gush more and make this review longer, I have to leave now to recover from a serious bout of feels that SOMEONE gave me recently *stares*
Well done, you're amazing ;)

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Review #7, by awesomepotterWhat's in a Name?: What's in a Name

14th August 2015:
Hi! I'm so sorry that it's taken so long for you to get this review, but here it is now!
I really love this one-shot. I have to admit that I love Draco as a character, and I thought you wrote him really well in this. He was completely set in his ways even when people started to question them, because he just put it down to jealousy and carried on believing his father's prejudice, but it was only when he couldn't find an excuse for something that he started to doubt it. I thought that this was very true to Draco's character, and I really liked the way he was written in this.
The section towards the end, where Draco is in front of thw Wizengamot after the war - the description and imagery was so vivid it gave me a serious case of the feels :( even small things like the fact that he didn't want his son to be crying in a prison cell implies that he did, and that mental image nealy made me cry! I have such a soft spot for post-war Draco, and your writing - just - aaah. I'm sad now.
I really like what you did with the prompt, too - your writing showed initially how important the Malfoy name was, both to Draco and his family and to the rest of the world, but then also how it meant that he was hated and treated badly himself because he was a Malfoy. And the bit at the end? Are you trying to kill me with feels today? Really, that's not cool.
I loved this! You're an amazing writer xxx

Author's Response: Hey Grace,

Thanks so much for hosting a great challenge. The prompt was a lot of fun to write for, so I'm pleased you enjoyed the fic.


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Review #8, by awesomepotterHaunted: X

12th August 2015:
Hello! Here's your challenge entry review (I'm sorry it took so long!)
I really enjoyed your story - I thought it was an interesting insight into Hagrid's life. I don't see many fics written about Hagrid at all, so it was an interesting character to read, and I thought the backstory you had at the beginning - about finding his father's body - was very well written. The description of the body was horrifying yet beautiful, comparing the blood around his head to the sunset. The sections which dealed with the more traumatic areas of Hagrid's life were written very vividly and effectively, but remained - in my opinion - very sensitive. It
can be a difficult thing to write a character who's been affected so deeply, but I thought you did it very well.
All of your description was very clear and created a very vivid image of what was happening - it was lovely to read. I thought what you did with the prompt was very interesting and it certainly wasn't what I was expecting fomr this one. I loved reading this - well done!

Author's Response: Thank you so much for the lovely review.

I spent a lot of time thinking about what I should write about for this prompt, and then I started thinking about hagrid for the other challenge and everything kind of fell into place. Once I started, it was really clear to me. I couldn't have written anything else because this was just the perfect scene. I started multiple times before finally figuring out that I had to go back to Hagrid's childhood... and then it just flowed out of my fingers without even thinking about it.

Thanks for the review

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Review #9, by awesomepotterFarewell: Farewell

12th August 2015:
Hi! I'm so sorry that it's taken so long for me to review, but I'm here now!
I thought it was a lovely interpretation of the prompt you were given. I had a feeling when I put it on my list that someone might write about someone's death, and I suppose you did (well, Albus was contemplating his imminent death) but you didn't make it cliched at all. It was still incredibly interesting to read, including a much darker part of Albus than we ever really get to see in the books. We get to know about Grindelwald's death, but the parts where Albus describes his thought and feelings gave me SERIOUS FEELS. Why did you have to do that to me? Like, really. I'm sad now.
I thought, though, that you managed to get Albus really well. Sometimes, he can be a very difficult character to write, but I thought the way he was written here was really lovely, and very engaging to read.
I thought the prompt was very well written, and I really enjoyed reading it. Well done! (and now I will leave you so I can try and recover from my feels. Gaaah.)

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Review #10, by awesomepotterDifferences: Differences

11th August 2015:
Hi! I'm so sorry it's taken this long to review your entry but I'm here now!
I loved the way you interpreted the prompt - when I saw it was a Ron/Hermione story I initially assumed it would be about them together as a couple, but I like how you turned it around so that it showed how foregone conclusions may not always be entirely accurate. I, personally, am not a Ron/Hermione shipper but I liked how you made the reason for the couple breaking up realistic. Sometimes I see people coming up with all sorts of reasons for couples breaking up, but I thought you handled the reasoning, in this case, very well. Both characters responded realistically to the situation, too, so I thought you wrote the plot very well.
I thought that your writing was very effective, using the newspaper article to reveal that they had decided to break up in the end. Overall, it was a very interesting story to read and I really liked the unexpected way in which you interpreted the prompt you got.
Well done!

Author's Response: I am glad that you liked it. I'm not usually a Ron/Hermione shipper either, but I thought that the prompt just seemed to fit them quite well.

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Review #11, by awesomepotterThe Duet Of Pansy And Draco: Cantata

7th June 2015:
Hello! This is your review for the Gryffindor Review Exchange, and I'm so sorry that it's late, but I haven't been very well rcently. But I'm here now, so here it is!
I thought you did a great job on this. I can't quite pinpoint why, but I had a feeling something was off from the beginning of the story. I had a feeling that it wouldn't actually be Pansy and Draco's wedding at the beginning, and then it became obvious that those sections in italics were from Draco's POV and I was like 'ok, maybe it IS their wedding'. And then it wasn't. You kept me guessing, though, which made it really interesting to read!
I've always thought of Pansy as a bit of an enigma - I think she's a girl who is potentially very intelligent and opinionated, but has been suppressed by the whole pureblood regime, which means that she focusses her efforts into things like Draco, and getting the man she believes she loves, over other things which she could potentially have done had she not been female. I think you wrote Pansy really well here. The whole thing that she originally chose Gregory to try and make Draco jealous, but only realised too late that it wouldn't work but went with it anyway was, I think, a very true side of Pansy. As a pureblood female, basically her only role is to bear pureblood heirs for her line, so the fact that she goes through with the wedding anyway is very true to the morals that would have been installed in her.
I also think that you got Draco down very well - his subtle disdain for Pansy was very typical of his character. The subtle dissonance you created right from the start helped to create a very uneasy atmosphere all through your story, and it made it very enjoyable to read.
All in all, a very orignal plot idea which was well executed and that I really enjoyed reading. Again, I'm so sorry that this is so late, and please excuse any typos - I'm really quite tired right now :)


Author's Response: Hi Grace!

I'm so happy to hear that I kept you guessing through the whole story. That was definitely my goal with this one.

What a relief to hear that you like my characterization of Pansy. I don't think she's stupid by any stretch of the imagination. I just think that her scheming gets her into tight spots and her inability to let things go keeps her from getting out of them.

Draco is one of my favorite characters to write, mainly because I enjoy his sort of snarky attitude.

Thank you so much for stopping by to read this! And no worries on the timing.


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Review #12, by awesomepotterThe Riddle of Riddle House: The Riddle of Riddle House

14th December 2014:
I really liked this - such a unique plotline. What gave you the idea for this? The premise of it had me really interested and the writing certainly lived up to it. I loved the mystery of it - I mean. Riddle said he hadn't killed his father, but was that really true? And who on earth did Voldemort have kids with? Did you have any sort of ideas about that when you wrote this, or was it just to be left forever undecided?
I also really loved the anticlimactic ending of the piece - it left me thinking 'Oh. Is that it, then?', but not in a bad way (if that makes sense at all!). I think it tied in so well with the beginning - there being a dead body and then nothing really that action-packed happening after its discovery. It was really well-shaped in that respect.
Actually now I think about it, I'm really confused - part of me thinks Riddle did kill his dad, because the whole underage magic thing was never answered, and although he said he didn't know anything about the wizarding world, he had a wand with him. Part of me thinks he didn't though, because he said the dad fell down the stairs - but then he didn't have a mark on him - so by that, I mean I think he maybe did kill his father? I think? Maybe?
Anyway, well done - it was a fab piece of writing!
Yours in Confusion,

Author's Response: Hi Grace!

This was a challenge entry, so I was rushed. I'm glad you liked it though - this is probably my least favourite story on my AP. I didn't really have any idea of where I was going when I wrote this, I just tried to finish it as quick as possible.

I've been toying with the idea of a sequel/prequel/other related story to elaborate on what happened - both for myself and for confused readers.


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Review #13, by awesomepotterGone: The Disappearance

14th December 2014:
Oh my goodness, this story is nothing like any I've read before. The concept is so interesting, and all the unanswered questions - where did they go, why was Albus left behind, will they ever return? - just serve to make this even more enrapturing to read.
I think the way you portrayed Albus' emotions throughout was perfect - the intitial confusion, then realisation, then slight acceptance (or possibly denial) followed by the grief and encroaching madness were so realistically written I couldn't help but feel it with him, all the way through. This is such an incredible piece of writing; everything about it is absolute perfection. I love how Albus only really caves when he sees the photos, that he only truly seems to realise what has happened to him when he sees his friends again (albeit in photograph form). It's just spellbinding from the very first sentence, and I really enjoyed reading it. Thankyou for such a superb piece of writing :)
awesomepotter xxx

Author's Response: Wow, this review surprised me so much! I haven't been around the forums much lately, so I'm just shocked someone came across my stories at all, not to mention reviewed one!

I tend to get these ridiculous 'what ifs' that I can't get out of my head and this is the result of that. I definitely left some unanswered questions here. In a way, I wanted to avoid answering any questions. I just wanted everyone to disappear and that be that. Somehow that seemed more fun than jumping through hoops to explain it.

Absolute perfection is an amazing compliment, thank you so much for this review! It really made my day :)

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Review #14, by awesomepotterPsyche: Prologue

30th August 2014:
Hi! Here for the Gryffindor review exchange - I'm sorry this took me so long!
I enjoyed this a lot - whilst, personally, I'd never heard of the Greek myth before, I thought it was a very well written one-shot with excellently portrayed characters. I like the personality you made for Dominique - the controlling, egotistical girl who always needs to be on top came across very strongly and the way she dominates the rest of her 'posse' was very convincing at the beginning, although I loved how some of the girls at least clearly didn't adore her as much as she thought, given the comments after she left. As a character who isn't actually featured in the original HP series, we don;t really know much about her, so having a bit of a blank canvas to work with can both be a curse and a blessing, really - you have a bit of freedom in how you portray her, but then again, sometimes this can mean that the character ends up as being incredibly random and off-putting for readers to read about. However, I think you really nailed it down well in Dominique, which can be a hard thing to do in only a one-shot. Her character is so well-defined in this that it does really make the one-shot a lot more enjoyable to read, and makes the writing engaging and overall a very well-written story. Well done!
I also like your description in the piece - especially the first sentence, which I found created a really vivid image in my head (that might sound a bit weird, but I hope not) when I read it. I thought your use of descriptive sentences was really effective in reinforcing the very different personalities of the character involved, which made it really enjoyable to read.
Overall, I really liked it and I congratulate you on a job well done! Apologies this review won't be as long as I wanted it to be, but after a while, even telling you I relly liked everything gets a little repetitive ;)
Thankyou for such a lovely one-shot!
awesomepotter xxx

Author's Response: Hey!

Like I said in my review, you're much earlier than me when it comes to reviewing. Anyhow, thanks a million for this review!

I was hoping that the story could be followed even by people who were not very familiar with Greek myths. This particular myth is a lesser known one (until, of course, Rick Riordan mentioned it in his latest book and then suddenly everyone knows what it is) and I felt that that could give me the freedom to modify it to fit the story.

I'm glad you feel the 'popular girl vibe' from Dominique. I personally think I went a little over the top, but I guess it was really helpful in painting an effective picture of who she is. I'm so happy that you picked up on those tiny details like her friends not really being her friends.

Your comment about the pros and cons of writing a non HP character is spot on, really. That is the whole reason as to why I feel so much more comfortable writing stories in next gen as opposed to any other era. The constraints on the character are so much less than usual.

Description has always been a weak point of mine, so I'm thrilled you actually enjoyed it. The problem comes when I try to figure out where I should add description and how much. I'm glad it constructively influenced the story!

This was such an amazing review and I don't quite understand why you are apologising for it. It brightened my day, really, and I needed to take a couple more to come down from cloud nine to respond to it ;) Thanks a million for stopping by!

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Review #15, by awesomepotterRemember Me: ii. this love

29th July 2014:
Hey there! Here for our review swap :)

This, admittedly, isn't the sort of thing I'd often choose to read on first inspection, but I confess that I really like this piece - the images it conjusres in my head are so vivid, and so sad at the same time. You do a great job of making us feel empathy towards Kasha, but then again I can't bring myself to feel any anger towards Teddy for causing it, although it's pretty fair to say he did. It's also a pretty unusual style you've chosen to write in, and whilst for some people it often hinders writing, in this case you really pull it off, and it even helps us to feel what Kasha's going through as if focuses not on people, or places, or description, but what's going on in her head, the raw emotion she feels. It's very effective and really helps towards creatin what is, in my view at least, an excellent piece of writing. Nothing in particular stood out to me as being OTT, out of place etc., so well done!
A very enjoyable story to read, and I thank you for the review swap!

awesomepotter xxx

(P.S. I'm sorry for such a short review, but there are only so many ways I can think of to tell you your story's awesome without getting weird :P)

Author's Response: Hey!

Thank you so much. And bearing in mind the actual chapters are only 500 words each, I'm not really going to complain about short reviews ;) this is barely even short, it's lovely and long! Thanks :D


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Review #16, by awesomepotter'Till Death Do Us Part: Just Run

6th July 2014:
This is a House Cup 2014 review!

I've been really enjoying these last few chapters! Whilst I do feel annoyed with Draco for running away from Hermione, I do (sort of) see why. I mean, he's supposed to be a Death Eater, a Pureblood Death Eater who goes out and tortures/maims/kills people, and Hermione's just announced that she is pregnant with a half-blood baby. That's a heck of a lot to deal with, and so the shock probably just got to him and he needed some time alone to think. Well, that had better be the reason, anyway, or else I really will og after him with a swinging club ;) But, seriously, once he's had some time to think, I'm sure he'll do what's best for Hermione and the baby because whilst he is still a Death Eater, he is still a good person at heart. When he talks to Narcissa at the start, I get the impression that he denies the wish for children not becuase he genuinely doesn;t want them, it's because, in his current situation, he feels he can't do right by them, and can't do what's best for them.
I'm interested to see where this thing with Evelyn is going, too - I wonder what she could be up to... hmmm... oh, and the prophecy! Did we ever hear a definitive end to that?
Anyway, really loving the story, and please update soon!

awesomepotter xxx

Author's Response: HI! Long time no hear from ^__^ It's great to read your reviews again.

Yes, Draco is certainly shock b/c of everything from the war now to the past to how his father would react. He definitely cracked under pressure. Even if it isn't another reason, I decided I still want to swing a club after him LOL

Yes, you feel like Narcissa. Although a baby wasn't plan, he would love it, but the world as they know it, isn't easy. I wonder how wizards and witches had children during the 1st or 2nd canon wars!

The prophecy ended when Rabastan had his say. It was some insight, but you will never truly know.

Anyway, thanks for R&R! And I hope to hear form you again! XOXO

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Review #17, by awesomepotterDo Not Fear the Full Moon: Harry's Home

22nd June 2014:
I've been meaning to review for a while now, but I keep forgetting! I really like this story, and I hope you keep it up. I wonder what sentence you'll give Peter - I can't wait to read about the trial (which I hope will be soon!). Lovely Harry/Sirius interaction, and I hope we'll see some more of that now they're together. Keep it up and please update soon!
awesomepotter xxx

Author's Response: Thanks! I'm working on the trial now and then I will wrap this story up. I'm in the middle of exams right now, so Chapter 5 might take a bit longer, but I will definitely update faster in the summer!

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Review #18, by awesomepotterHow I Saved the Wizarding World with Hair Potions, By Gilderoy Lockhart: Hair-Care Potion Maker Extraordinaire

8th June 2014:
Hey there! I'm here for our review swap on the forums, and I apologise for how long it's taken for me to get around to doing this!
I love your characterization of Lockhart - he's cocky and full of himself, but it's in a rather innocent way. As a character, I get the impression that he doesn't mean to be annoying or a complete git, he just firmly believes he's the bee's knees and doesn't underdstand why not everyone seems to agree. I always think he's a bit of a 'Tim Nice-but-Dim', and you conveyed that really well to me.
I love how you managed to include James and Sirius into this; I think you characterized them really well too. So basically, big clap for characterization ;)
I do like this because, while actually not much happens plot-wise, in the case of this story I find that that's a GOOD thing. It fits with the personality of the main character. For Gilderoy, nothing really troubles him. He just keeps pottering along in his marvellous little world, and nothing really affects him. So to have a one-shot where by the end, Lockhart has basically done... well, not a lot, does fit in with the story, and I think it really does help with the characterisation all the more. Did that sound like a backhanded compliment? I didn't mean to make it sound like one, although when I read it back aminute ago it sort of seemed like one (to me, but what do I know?). I didn't mean to! Anyway, on with the review...
You've just created an excellent piece of work here. I can't think of anything else to say apart from how wonderful it is. Your characterisation is just fabulous, creating a boy whi we really, REALLY want to hate - but we can't becuase he hasn't actually done anything wrong. I really loved this story and I can only apologise for not writing more.
Well done!
awesomepotter xxx

Author's Response: Hi! Thank you, I'm so glad you like the portrayal of Lockhart. I think you've hit the nail on the head about Lockhart being innocent about his arrogance, he's just really deluded haha. I'm so glad you enjoyed the characterisation of both him and James and Sirius.

That is very true, there essentially is no plot to this fic haha! I'm glad to hear that it fit with his personality! And no it doesn't seem like a backhanded compliment, I get what you mean. :)

I suppose apart from turning James into half a mermaid, lying about it, and cheating at Potions, he really hasn't done anything wrong. But yeah exactly, he doesn't see those things as being wrong, so you're right! :p Your review was so so lovely, thank you so much for reading and I'm thrilled you enjoyed the story! ♡

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Review #19, by awesomepotterClementine: Clementine

7th June 2014:
Hey there! I'm here for our lovely review swap :)
I'm just going to start by congratulating you on writing in second person! You maintained it really well throughout the piece, and I think it really suits the situation because you used it so effectively. I'm terrible at second person, so big clap ;)
I really like Fleur's worries about the dress - her insecurities really show how nervous she is and also how strongly she feels for Bill all without actually stating it, especially when you talk about how confident she usually is and how easy a decision her wardrobe is most of the time. I love how she worries about the colour of the dress being the same colour as Bill's hair, only for Bill to give her an orange rose. I can't quite explain why, but I really liked that and found it quite endearingly sweet. It's funny how she seems to be confident and elegant in his presence, yet as soon as he isn't she starts overthinking things and allowing her mind to run away with itself, overthinking things.
It's really lovely how you've kept things bare, as well - leaving most of the details like places and people out of the piece so we can really focus on Fleur's thoughts and the interaction between the two main characters. Allowing us really see how Fleur is thinking during this piece definitely makes it a very interesting one-shot.
I'm afraid I will have to confess that I'm terrible at reviews, and especially the constructive criticism part. I'm usually so overawed at the standard of the writing that I simply can't think of any way in which it could be better (as I am with this one!) Congratulations on the wonderful work, I really did enjoy reading your piece. Sorry the review is so short, but like I said, I did really love it and I can;t think of any way in which I could have loved it more!

Thanks for such a lovely story,
awesomepotter xxx

Author's Response: Hey there - thanks so much for the review and for the swap! It was so much fun to do! :)

Thanks! :) I actually really like writing in second person, and it just seemed to fit so well with this when I started writing, so I just went with it :P I'm glad you like it, though!

I'm so happy you liked Fleur - she's one of those characters people love to hate, I think, and I really loved writing her in this because Bill and Fleur are one of those couples I love. I wanted to show her as less perfect than people often show her to be, hence the dress confusion and all - plus it tied in rather neatly with the colour and emotion from the challenge, so I can't claim total credit for that ;) Haha, the orange rose - yeah, I couldn't resist! Also, again, it helped with the colour theme, so not all mine, in a sense! Omigosh, I'm so glad you liked it being so kinda stripped back, because I'm so bad at writing short things - I usually write really long things - so this was such a challenge for me.

Aww, no, no worries about any of it! This was such a lovely review to get, and such a great swap to do - so thank you again for both of them, and I'm so glad you enjoyed it! :)

Aph xx

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Review #20, by awesomepotter'Till Death Do Us Part: After the Wedding

26th May 2014:
No! You're not allowed to go on a cruise and leave me waiting! You're not!

... oh, okay. I suppose you can go. But only for a little bit! And then you have to come back and keep giving me lots of lovely chapters!

I can't wait to see what they get up to on their honeymoon ;) and in my opinion (just me being my fluffy, soppy self) I thought the wedding was really well written; I really liked it! I also like how Narcissa has warmed to Hermione over the story - in my opintion she doesn't really beleve in all the Death Eater nonsense, just puts up with it (and Lucius) becuase of her heritage. Please, please tell me you're going to update before you leave! Please? Pwetty pwease?

Keep writing at the speed of light!
awesomepotter xxx


Author's Response: AW! Sorry T___T Yes, I promise when I come back I will update right away. No waiting!
I'm glad you like the wedding. It's like 1/2 and 1/2. Some like it, some thought it was dull. I thought it was slightly boring, but I couldn't do that to them and ruin their wedding. I'm not Satan.
Yes, Narcissa is caught in the middle again. Even during the first two wars, she never was officially a Death Eater.
YES! I have the last chapter before I leave in validation right now. =D

Thanks so much for R&R! ^__^

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Review #21, by awesomepotterMoonlit Sonata: Epilogue

24th May 2014:
Ooh, I wanted a happy ending :(

I think the way you managed to capture all of the characters' misery and emotion was really good, although it would have been nice for them (especially Remus) to have maybe thought of her. Oh well, I suppose they've got other things on their minds...
Really effective and well written ending to what has been a really lovely story to read. Just a shame that it couldn't have ended more happily. I still haven't gotten over the fact that not all stories do!
Congrats on finishing a wonderful story so well,
awesomepotter xxx

Author's Response: Aw, I'm sorry about the sadness. I would have tried to make it a little happier, but I feel like that just doesn't work so well with the Marauders. When writing them, happiness outside of Hogwarts feels forced. But perhaps that's just me.

I'm really glad you enjoyed the story despite the ending! :D Thanks so much for the lovely review. :)

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Review #22, by awesomepotterAshen Petals: Chosen

14th May 2014:
Hey there! I'm here from the review swap on the forums - just thought I'd let you know ;)

I loved this one-shot, and to do this in 500 words is extremely impressive. I'd have to say that this is a young Tom Riddle - who else has such a penchant for destroying things, and such a prominent sense of superiority?
I really love the way you described the burning of the flower and the way it changes colour and crumbles as it burns. The way you've captured Riddle's mind at that point is very effective - thinking that the flower was useless, weak as it turned to ash. It really captures his view on his world, and is almost a representative of what he would become in later life, being the fire destroying and degrading everything in its path as it sweeps down the flower.
I also really liked the section where the other boy finds Riddle with the burnt flower. When the boy backs off, and Riddle almost feels hurt because he believes his power to be special and chosen, it does give is a good insight into his mind again. To me, at least, Voldemort/Tom Riddle is extremely proud and does have one major superiority complex, but it was probably partly born from rejection and misunderstanding.
I think you captured the essence of Tom Riddle (at least, I'm hoping that's who he is or I'm going to be looking pretty silly right now) very well, and I don't think it's been rushed at all. If you'd had more words in which to write it, that would have been good too, but I don't think this seemed rushed. I'm only sorry I can't give more of a balanced review and give you a couple of pointers to improve on - but then again, I'm not sorry, becuase that means I've just read a really fab piece of writing!
Well done and thankyou for giving me the pleasure of reading this,
awesomepotter xxx
(P.S. - sorry for all the typos that are probably floating around!)



I'm so thankful you stopped by to read and review, even if it is for the Review Exchange so...thank you. :'D

The burning flower was definitely one of my favourite parts to write in this story, it was fun picturing it and portraying it.

I agree with you on the 'almost hurt' part. Even he is human, too. He was once innocent as well. I believe most evil are from misconstrued beliefs born with pain. It's not an excuse, nor is it right, but it is still painful.

I'm neither going to confirm or negate your conclusion, but I'm happy about what you have to say about the character and that you think the story doesn't seem rushed. That's okay about the review not having much to point out, the story was short too anyway so there isn't much to address.

Again, thank you so much for reading this, I'm satisfied knowing you enjoyed the read.

Lots of Love,
~ Sevvy
*offers flowers*

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Review #23, by awesomepotterAll the Difference : Chapter Five

30th April 2014:
Such a lovely chapter! I really hope Lily finally gets to have a rant at Petunia sometime in the future, because I think she deserves her comeuppance and a small aprt of me thinks it'd be really funny... so am I weird?
Lovely interactions between the Potters again, I just can't wait to see how they react when Harry tells them about his dealings with Voldemort. Lily's reaction to hearing how Petunia treats Harry is so realistic, I thought you got her bang-on ;)
One thing, though - I might have missed it ,and I'm sorry if I did, but what is Harry going to tell the Dursleys about not staying with them anymore if they can't be told about James and Lily's return?
Much applause (even though you can't see me, I know) and please update soon :),
awesomepotter xxx

Author's Response: Hi! Thanks for the review! And everything you mentioned about Petunia and Lily, and the Dursley's finding out about the situation will be part of the next chapter or two, along with more talk about Harry and Voldemort!

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Review #24, by awesomepotterMistletoe Mishap: Mistletoe Mishap

26th April 2014:
Wahey! Someone who's seen AVPM! It's an absolute personal fave of mine, and I always loved 'Shlongbottom' as a nickname!
Fabulous writing - I think your characterizations are excellent - and the bit with Ginny at the end made me laugh so much!
Great work!
awesomepotter xxx

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Review #25, by awesomepotter'D' is for Draco: His Unrest

21st April 2014:
I'm really enjoying this story -love a good bit of Dramione, me ;) I hope Draco will fess up soon and I can't wait to see if Hermione will try the thing with the apple peel! Loving the work so please update soon!
awesomepotter xxx

Author's Response: Thank you! I've just sent the next bit so hopefully soon! :)


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