Reading Reviews From Member: TidalDragon
  
725 Reviews Found

Review #1, by TidalDragonNot Fade Away: Year 1: A Storm is Threatening

18th May 2016:
Howdy Cath! I had hoped to get to more of your story (well, I'd hoped to finish it) but life conspired against me and I'm trying to get some last minute reviews in before voting closes.

I thought this was a great beginning structurally first of all. It's a challenging project you're taking on based on the summary, but you take a smart tack I think given that by introducing a lot of the different dimensions right off the bat and in a single chapter rather than going chapter-to-chapter with different POVs which would both absurdly elongate things and also get confusing or leave things behind.

As far as the details go, I think you also did an exceptional job making the characters have true and differentiable personalities, which is no easy feat when you have so many featuring so close to one another. It made everything feel much more authentic. If I had to pick favorites I think it would be the opening scene with Sirius and Regulus though - the dynamic you painted seemed so workable and yet quite different from what we normally see, where Regulus is so completely perfect as a "proper Black."

I'll come back and read more and finish! Just make sure to remind me ;)

Author's Response: Thanks so much for tackling this at all! I'll doubtless not at all nag you to finish it off, but I'd be pleased if you did.

Considering when I wrote this story I was planning on perpetually having 1 POV per chapter, this was intended as a necessary introduction of everyone right off the bat. Down the line I gave up on that scheme as too clunky, but I was still pretty happy with this as a setup so I'm glad it worked.

Sirius' intro definitely has the most emotional weight at this juncture; Lily's is shortest because we're about to get the whole first chapter from her POV and every other character I need to explain just who the hell these OCs (or near enough, in Alice's case) even are.

Thanks for reviewing!


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Review #2, by TidalDragonStranger: 7 Years Old

18th May 2016:
Howdy Kaitlin! I'm trying to get some last minute reviews in for my (failed - CURSE GMT) quest.

I think it was a bold and impressive choice to start with this story with the character so young. It's undeniable that she's old enough to really start recognizing that the gender she's "supposed" to be doesn't match her true self, but I think it's such a challenge to get that across in a believable way at this age. You chose the perfect vehicle I think with the color of the robes and that really helped it feel effortless. A great inclusion was also the harsh reaction from her mother - it sheds light not just on how people with a non-cis gender identity find their sense of self rebuked roundly very early on, but also on how stifling society's gender constructs can be because even though now we're talking about color, it quickly expands when it comes to attire and interests and myriad of other things unfortunately.

An auspicious start! I'll try to come back and finish the story later (just make sure you remind me)!

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Review #3, by TidalDragonTransparent: Unlucky

17th May 2016:
Well, well! This chapter was back to your resplendent best. You carried on your tradition of exceptional characterization with the deeper exploration of Tiberius and it was quite a developmental milestone for Dominique to get so confident and flirtatious, even if it's still far from stable. She seems to be taking the "fake it 'til you make it" maxim to heart even if it took awhile.

I will say that I almost thought from the doorman scene that Teddy might be the rat at issue or at the very connected to him and I'm interested to see going forward whether this end-of-chapter drama feeds into that.

Ahhh...and how can I not mention the intimacy between Dominique and Teddy just before it happened. Who knows what will befall them next - but I wonder if perhaps Dominique and Teddy couldn't at least improve each other after all, despite your best efforts to make one desperately silent and the other easily hate-able.

Thanks for carrying on with the story and continuing to deliver chapters to believe in!

Author's Response: Hey!

Welcome back and thanks so much for this great review~! It's one of my favorites!

I think this chapter really relied heavy on emotion. Dominique is in over her head so I wanted to really suck you guys in and she proved to be quite the actress. Haha.

I wanted to talk about Tiberius more here because we get such a cliffhanger in the last chapter. I didn't go into a lot of detail about him though, I did reference another story (The entire line about Greengrass comes from my story A Force of Wills. The family are basically the mafia but that flew right over everyone's heads)

I forgot to mention the thing about the doorman in your last review. He was an awfully cheerful fellow, wasn't he? I need to make people smile more. Hahah.

Anyway, the rat issue will be discussed in the next chapter. Teddy is obviously not going to get out of this without some trouble. It's all going to come tumbling down.

I think we're really moving forward with these two. Haha. Emotionally, they're starting to get more and more dependent on one another. I'll write more scenes with these two exploring that, Dominique running from it and Teddy trying to understand what it might mean. You know, typical stuff.

I had another reviewer say that two broken things can make a wonderful relationship or something along those lines. I will keep thinking of Teddy and Dominique like this from now on.

Thanks!

Much love,

Gabbie


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Review #4, by TidalDragonTransparent: The Green Dragon

17th May 2016:
Howdy Gabbie! It's a pleasure to be back here to your fine tale!

As usual you did an excellent job of capturing the emotions, often oscillating, of this duo. And they are operating together enough nowadays that we might have to start calling them a duo - a scary prospect for Dominique, but perhaps some sort of positive for Teddy who continues to thaw now and again in her presence. Oh - and I'd be terribly remiss if I didn't applaud you for the doorman - he was one of the liveliest characters I've read of yours since Audrey.

On the CC side, I did think this was a little description heavy (even for a new setting) and a tad sluggish plot-wise. I think (and as, you know, the actual author - feel free to correct me if I'm wrong :p) the entire design was to use that as a sort of strategic lead-up to the big reveal at the end, but perhaps it was the length that did it to me. I don't know. Just a thought.

Anyway, since I'm so late, I'll hit you with a review on Chapter 13 as well. See you there!

Author's Response: Hello!

It's always lovely hearing from you and I'm so glad that you're still interested in reading this story! :D

I think it's getting to the point where we might have to start calling Teddy and Dominique a couple. Not in the romantic sense just yet but they're together so often now that it's kind of hard to picture them separated, which was my intention from the beginning.

Dominique isn't ready for more but she's falling into it the more this story goes.

Teddy will continue to thaw around her though and I think by the end of this story he might finally be "real".

I did think this chapter was really heavy on the descriptions. I will go back and tone them down some and while I was reading, I caught some other stuff that kind of disrupted the flow. It didn't move quickly enough for me either and Tiberius was supposed to actually show up and have a chat with them in this chapter.

I'll try and cut it down the next time I go in and edit, thanks for being so honest!

Much love,

Gabbie


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Review #5, by TidalDragonAll the World's a Stage: And One Man in His Time Plays Many Parts

15th May 2016:
Howdy Lizzie! I'm taking a break from the (many) novels in my reviewing quest and thus, I have been led here to your fine tale.

I thought this story was an delightful and amusing addition to the body of dad!Harry Next-Gen stories. While the play itself had humorous moments, I have to say my favorite part was the parental reactions by Harry and Ginny. Being a dad myself it's always funny to see what wild ideas and crazy schemes your kid will come up with for a good (or not) reason and yet, like Harry/Ginny, on those good occasions we of course indulge. I thought the back and forth between Harry and Ginny and stern!Ginny and laid-back!Harry were a good parenting type fit for the both of them as well.

Thanks for sharing this story with us - and phone aside, I didn't notice ANY typos in this bad boy - impressive!

Author's Response: Kevin!!

Thank you for taking the time to review this story!! I always love getting a review from you!

Hehehe, I think Harry and Ginny's reactions are what really made the story too! I really enjoyed coming up with the kid's shenanigans, but I know the feeling of watching something like that and being torn between ruining the moment or dealing with the mess afterwards. :P This was certainly a result of that!

Thank you so much for your wonderful review, Kevin! You're amazing!!


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Review #6, by TidalDragonUpside Right: Upside Right

15th May 2016:
Howdy Frankie! I'm trying desperately to read all the Golden Paw nominees before voting and I have reached your story while taking a break from the novels (there are SO MANY novels this year).

I want to first say that I think the light you shed on dyslexia with this story was really great. I didn't know the truth of it until I met someone who actually had a sibling with dyslexia in college and realized it's much more than just occasionally mixing up letters which so many people seem to joke about saying "Oops, I got a little dyslexic." I think Lily's character is a really positive one for people to read for that reason because it shows that true dyslexia is no laughing matter and what a struggle it is for people who deal with it every day - but also strikes a positive note with how much they can still accomplish.

If I had any CC it would only be that I thought Lily's character took a less independent turn after she started to date James, which didn't seem to jive for me with the character you'd created prior, but it only struck me in a couple of lines so it didn't detract much overall.

Thanks for sharing this story with us!

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Review #7, by TidalDragonKeeping Appearances: Calculated Risk

15th May 2016:
Howdy again Kaitlin! I suspect I'll be visiting your stories quite often as I race toward the finish in my Golden Paw reviewing frenzy, but here I am.

As I was saying when I read Dan's piece, I don't often read Bellatrix stories for two reasons: (1) I just hate her (sue me :p) and (2) they just don't often feel "right" to me. Here, I think by the end you nearly hit the mark for me at this point in her life.

What was missing? I think the only thing for me was a little MORE of her motivations throughout the story. Though we get a clear picture of who she is, there's a bit less of WHY she is that I think could've been helpful. That's the absent 10 percent though.

What was there? The 90 percent for starters. I think it makes it extra difficult for people to accurately capture Bellatrix when you're writing regarding the arranged marriage scenario because so many people seem to get sucked into the engagement and pre-marriage aspects that her personality (other than the occasional sharp dialogue and sneer) doesn't really come through. You didn't fall into that trap though because: (1) instead of embracing it, you made her disdain it and (2) you exposed the political motivation behind it at the very end - that it was all in service of her own ends and ultimately in her view, Voldemort's. You also showed us at least a glimpse of her capacity for fear so that she isn't a completely implacable force, which for me, I don't care who we're talking about, doesn't really ring true.

Thanks for sharing this story with us!

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Review #8, by TidalDragonBurning Inside: The Perfect Servant

15th May 2016:
Howdy Dan! It's been FAR too long since I read anything of yours. This was, truly, a masterpiece. I don't usually read stories that center on Bellatrix - primarily because I despise her, secondarily because most I've read don't really seem "right" to me somehow. The latter CANNOT be said of this.

This story (along with Bellatrix as its driving force) is intense from start to finish and it's intense in exactly the ways that Bellatrix is - her zealotry, her insanity, her determination - but it also doesn't fail to explore her as more than a maniacal Death Eather. Though she definitely becomes that, you make her character much more real by not just showing us the depths of her devotion or madness, but by showing her the very real building blocks that likely made it so - the family pressures and socialization, the fears and insecurities - and how Voldemort and serving him completely and perfectly filled those voids.

Though it perhaps goes without saying, I'll say it anyway, that I thought your descriptions in this story were also exceptional. It reminded me (though this was a much more...what's the right word...aggressive maybe, or violent (?) - it's just very thematically and in some ways stylistically different - story) of Sarah's (Gryffin_Duck) The Brightest Blue, where Alice Longbottom has chromesthesia. Which is kind of interesting on another level because there's obvious intersection between the characters.

ANYWAY - the point of all this rambling is to say that I thought this story was incredibly brilliant and I hope I'm not away as long next time because it also served as a reminder about how exceptional your work always proves to be.

Author's Response: Hey, Kevin.

I've been staring at this for days, wondering how to start to answer. At the beginning, I suppose.

Bellatrix is easy to despise and I don't honestly care for the way that most authors write her. If they're not trying to go totally AU and turn her into some sort of twisted love interest for Harry, they usually gloss over her mental instability. Neither one of these works for me. What makes Bellatrix such a powerful and interesting character is that she's the antithesis of the type of maternal love and devotion that's embodied by characters like Molly Weasley, Lily Potter and even her sister Narcissa. Bellatrix brings a completely different type of devotion, one that's driven by hate, prejudice, cruelty and -- I believe -- need. Bellatrix had a burning need for the Dark Lord's approval. He filled a void created by her sterile upbringing, her loveless marriage and her mental illness.

When you write Bellatrix, you have to be intense about it. She doesn't work any other way. In my first draft, this story was longer. In the end, I cut out everything that might be considered "filler".

I read Sarah's story after I read this review. I definitely see the similarity, even though I wasn't thinking of Bellatrix's condition that way at the time I wrote this. At any rate, thanks for pointing it out. It was a really good read.

I really appreciate you stopping by. This was a lot of fun to write.

Thanks!
-Dan


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Review #9, by TidalDragonHourglass: 3 years, 23 days

15th May 2016:
Well. I've now realized that in all the reviews I've left you, I've been that idiot who didn't read the summary to see that this is still a WIP. #failsauce But ultimately good because I'm pretty psyched that I'll have the opportunity to keep reading this for awhile on into the future!

Now that I've reached the end (of what there is so far), it's the best time to say that I think you've crafted something truly great here Gina! The characters are both impressive and intriguing, the dynamics authentic and believable, and it's all held together by this (I know I'm repeating this phrase) elegant simplicity that is SO welcome to read because it occupies this delightful middle ground between showy language and excessive minimalism - basically it's the type of writing that I love to read and I think it's incredible.

I'm adding this bad boy to my favorites list.

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Review #10, by TidalDragonHourglass: 3 years, 30 days

15th May 2016:
Well isn't DLZ just a motherlode of trouble? I am quietly hopeful that it won't screw up this whole Albus/Sophie thing you've got going though - I wondered if Joel was going to try to set them up, but you did a good job misdirecting it with the frosty relationship between those two owing to his Hufflepuff-hate (which how that's a thing, I just don't even know). In any event it's good to see Joel's machinations got Albus's head out of his rear.

Of course, the moments immediately post-realization gave you a great opportunity to put your more prosaic descriptive talents to work and it was very well done and very true really how in those minutes, days, hours, etc after you've developed an interest in someone you look at them differently, see more, etc. Well done.

Now I suppose all that's left to do is leave this chapter for the grand, post-memory charm finale...

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Review #11, by TidalDragonHourglass: 3 years 31 days, part two

15th May 2016:
Well...since you've inquired. I'm not at all convinced by Miss DLZ's appearance and explanation. I'm still thinking there's more to it, the note was a warning, something bad happened to Albus as a result (perhaps the something that created the scar?), and that somehow Miss DLZ went 'Claw mode and turned back the clock so that it could be avoided? I don't know...but I have a strong feeling that DLZ is behind the whole scar business because we note that it was burning strongest when Albus was nearest to her, which evokes the Voldemort-Harry connection (though I'm pretty sure DLZ didn't make Albus a horcrux :p).

Anyway, the chapter was a nice installment (especially learning about your conception of Next-Gen Harry and how he is as a dad), and I imagine, will prove to be quite the calm before the storm. I suppose I'll find out soon enough ;)

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Review #12, by TidalDragonHourglass: 3 years 31 days

15th May 2016:
Well, as you promised, the plot IS thickening. Even independent of the scars and the blackouts and the letters (which I promise to come back to :p), I really enjoyed seeing more of Sophie than we have so far. She's someone who we learned before is quite important in Albus's life and so it's good we got to see a bit more of her identity through her own words and actions. AND she doesn't disappoint. She seems quite caring and earnest and helpful and some might be tempted to bop one Albus Potter over the head with a wand for passing on that. Not saying who. Shrug.

As for the plot stuff (see, returning as promised), I thought it was cool how you connected things from the previous chapter to this one and continued the sort of slower, mysterious feel from before until then it was like BANG - Gone in Sixty Seconds style and we have a mystery girl, a searing scar, and a possibly lying nurse (I can't decide...).

Can't wait to see what comes next!

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Review #13, by TidalDragonHourglass: 3 years 32 days

15th May 2016:
Leading with something rather minor this time, but if you ever come back to make edits, I thought I'd point out that in the paragraph where Albus notices Joel and Vanessa PDA-ing on the couch, I was confused by your use of "former" on first read, because in the sentence prior Joel had been the former. Maybe it's just me and my addled mind, but I thought I'd throw it out there.

ANYWAY - I think what I liked most about this chapter (surprisingly) was not the development of Albus's character (though I did thoroughly enjoy another of his pro-con lists - the cons are always amusing) and the plot progression, but the way you set up each movement and scene with this elegant simplicity. I noticed it before in an earlier chapter (and I can't remember whether I mentioned it then or not), but for some reason it really stood out to me at the beginning of this one and I wanted to make sure I paid it tribute. You made it all come together so naturally and effortlessly and frankly its something I'm rather jealous of as I feel that's a part of my writing that comes across awkward or mechanistic or something.

I'm interested to see what happens now as the plot is truly beginning to thicken...

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Review #14, by TidalDragonHourglass: 3 years 35 days

15th May 2016:
I DO like the addition of more characterization through some extra interplay. While I was enjoying it fine before, I think more interactive scenes (done well, like this) can really serve to add another dimension to characters, even if we're already met them and feel as if we've got a good handle on "who they are" so-to-speak.

Of course I also like the extra insight we get into who Joel is (especially since he's come up before and I assume he'll be coming up again). Even if he's not hugely important to the plot (or IS he?), I always like a handful of more developed "minor" characters for realism and helping more clearly define the major characters vis-a-vis their interactions. Kudos on starting that here!

On to Chapter 4!

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Review #15, by TidalDragonHourglass: 3 years 40 days

15th May 2016:
Hello again!

You really brought out in the beginning just how deep those issues you mentioned between Scorpius and his father run - he got salty FAST when the conversation ran to fathers. He also kept his own, yet distinctly Malfoy-esque tone.

I also enjoyed, for humor value if nothing else, the way you juxtaposed Albus being a Gryffindor and stating emphatically that he was going to pursue life as an auror with the outcome of the library incident and having him get "saved" by a Ravenclaw.

Interested to see what happens next as time seems to continue to tick down...

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Review #16, by TidalDragonHourglass: 3 years 47 days

15th May 2016:
Howdy Gina! I am picking back up on my review quest after a disastrous yesterday and that means I get to start on your story!

My thoughts will probably be briefer here because this is more of an introductory chapter, but nevertheless, you have given us a lot to think about. I enjoyed the different characterizations you've given us. Albus (if I'm reading correctly by the common room the pillows came from) is a Gryffindor, something of an introvert, and instead of having a fast, tight friendship with Scorpius, has something of a tense connection instead.

What I enjoyed most about the chapter though was the earnestness and simplicity in Albus's voice. But despite that, his descriptions aren't cheap or empty, they're careful and detailed, which I think is fitting for someone who seems to spend a fair amount of time alone.

You also set the ground work for something of a mystery with this note/letter from the mysterious "D.L.Z." Given the title and the language of the letter, I'm left wondering whether time-travel is going to come into play in this somhow, but I guess I'll have keep reading to find out.

See you in Chapter 2!

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Review #17, by TidalDragonclipped wings: the meeting (part three).

13th May 2016:
This was a delightful conclusion Sian! I did NOT make the connection (#fandomfail), but I think you handled this ending in just the right way. It's tempting after all Hepzibah endured, after all the time she's waiting for this reunion, after letting her find herself and her measure of happiness in the world, to go full bore and have a powerful, mother-daughter love-fest reunion, but I think this was much more honest and realistic. And I actually really liked that I think Hepzibah showcased her strength once more in NOT hugging her (and scaring her in the process) or getting all teary or closing off Isaac from it, but letting it become what it becomes. Leaving it on that note I think was a great choice and I will leave you on this note: This was a truly AMAZING piece for which you should be wholly commended! I could blather on and on, but I will sadly have to leave you with that inadequate praise.

Thanks so much for sharing this story with us!

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Review #18, by TidalDragonclipped wings: the escape.

13th May 2016:
Clipped wings ARE still wings! I love the characterizations in this chapter. There's this very heavy realism still with Hepzibah, and how slow she is to accept love after everything, how slow she is to truly trust. And there's also this cold idea of settling that evolves, beautifully in a way, into the lesson that perhaps the person you're meant to be with isn't everything you dreamed of. That dreams are just that when it comes to idealizing a partner or romance anyway and that happiness is to be found with REAL people through REAL effort, especially when they're broken.

I also like the idea of Isaac stepping up for Hepzibah - I only hope that her trust is genuine and that she allows him to help her in her quest to reunite with Saccharissa.

To the final chapter!

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Review #19, by TidalDragonclipped wings: the heartbreak.

13th May 2016:
As painful as the emotions Hepzibah is experiencing in this chapter are, I am encouraged to see this fight in her. Though she has been through so much, this chapter really shows how strong she still is.

I realize my reviews over the last three chapters may not have been that helpful as they've been more reactionary, but I think this chapter underscored for me one of the things I really like about how you've written Hepzibah - battered, but not quite broken. It's taken a real talent too to keep this part of her consistent throughout the story I think and to show us what type of person she is as she undergoes such tumult, but even as you have her endure these experiences, these trials, you maintain this clear voice for her and this definitive thread of powerful, determined emotion that lies at her core going through it all.

I'm looking forward to reading the conclusion in the next couple of chapters and even though I probably shouldn't - am hoping for the best. Clipped wings are still wings right?

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Review #20, by TidalDragonclipped wings: the goodbye.

13th May 2016:
I might have known. MAN these are some straight up terrible people, Sian. I cannot even imagine having someone, especially someone who's supposed to love me and support me, taking my son away by force and saying: "We need you to make us look good again. Someone else can do better with him." My true thoughts cannot be expressed in this space.

All that said, I think it feels in character for Hepzibah's parents and even for the era. Appearance is everything and forget about the consequences to ANYONE as long as they get what they want. To me it's an especially reprehensible form of cruelty.

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Review #21, by TidalDragonclipped wings: the meeting (part two).

12th May 2016:
Quite an interesting finish to this chapter with the mother who originally seemed so supportive upon hearing Hepzibah's cry cast against such words as "dread" and the dreaded question in a manner which seems to put things more in her hands than perhaps they should be.

I admire Hokey for her assistance in this situation and really throughout and perhaps its a commentary on the majority of the characters in this story and their motivations that the house elf comes across as the most "human" thus far (aside from Hepzibah herself). Empathy, friendship, support - all things you'd hope to find in other people and its an incredibly dark place to find yourself if you can't do so. I don't know that we'll get anymore of Edmund (hopefully not), but as I typed that last line it actually cast my thoughts back to Chapter 4 and made me realize more than I did at the time just how messed up a person he is - inviting her there just to publicly destroy her - TWISTED and indeed villainous as Hepzibah describes. And returning to last chapter (I think) I also realized that I did forget to mention the slight feeling that the sentence toward the end with the em-dash ran a bit long, not a big detractor obviously, but just a thought.

Time to see what comes next in what seems to be the wizarding world's quest to crush her very soul :(

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Review #22, by TidalDragonclipped wings: the quickening.

12th May 2016:
Wow. You're really laying it on this poor girl aren't you? I honestly did not see this part of the story coming (well, until I saw the title of this chapter :p) as I thought we might next see some justifiable wallowing and despair before she was forced to endure some great, external, fate-based horror to come and seal her fate rather than the consequence of their time together.

Still, it enhances the story and will continue to I expect given the era. An opportunity to explore the true cruelty of how women were often used and left behind in the era of courtship and how their former suitors were often not held accountable while they were judged by a harsher standard, and often, lost as a result. Of course, it still happens now, but I don't know that it would be as possible for the other party to escape sharing the scorn and there would at least be, in many cultures, social retribution against the man for not taking responsibility.

Poor Hepzibah...what will befall her (and now her baby) next...

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Review #23, by TidalDragonclipped wings: the rejection.

12th May 2016:
Ouch. Guys at that age can be an awful sort can't they? I do hope we'll see in full what led to this turn of events throughout the story, though in some way I imagine it's possible you'll deprive us of that. There is so much pain to be explored in the heartbreak, and so little of that pain can be fully plumbed if any element of closure is given. My suspicions at this point are for a combination of the trophy response (by which I mean that which we've already "won", we no longer desire so deeply - a cruel way to act, but a fundamental truth for some who prefer the chase), poisonous whispers, and someone's loose lips about what happened in Chapter 3.

The transition though, I have to pause to honor. I think the way you went from burning and yearning to cold was masterful in its abruptness because it wonderfully underscored the brutality of it all.

On to Chapter 5!

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Review #24, by TidalDragonclipped wings: the fall.

12th May 2016:
Ahh. Perhaps society? It was one I certainly considered given the restrictive overtones of the early chapters, but again, you leave us waiting, uncertain. There remain other possibilities.

There is a near-universality in this experience as well which I think you draw upon nicely, making the story accessible to all readers. Who HASN'T, whether in reality or in the recesses of their own mind, wanted to slip away as Edmund and Hepzibah, young and free and consumed by passion? Who hasn't bristled at the things life throws in the way of what feels like our truest connection?

I fear what comes next for Hepzibah, but if nothing else, I'm sure you'll write it well. ;)

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Review #25, by TidalDragonclipped wings: the passion.

12th May 2016:
Hmm Sian. Knowing what I feel I know of the title, I could almost pre-emptively strike at you for setting this up so brilliantly only to knock it down like some fantastic, intricate, yet ultimately doomed domino design.

But that would, alas, detract from the opportunity to praise you for the set-up. Again I think you capture the emotions so well here. Though we like to focus on the differences between the genders, there would certainly be a universality of understanding (for those who have already experienced it) of the early days of first love.

Still, you plant seeds well that make us wonder not WHETHER it will end, but already HOW and WHY. Will it be the gossip - lies, backstabbing, and treachery created by the jealous eyes she mostly ignores and certainly doesn't protect herself against? Is there something more sinister in Edmund's dancing with the other girls - something Hepzibah blinds herself to in the way that only love can force one to? Is it a flaw in fate's design? Some pattern of destiny that will conspire to keep them apart and destroy Hepzibah in the process? Or is it the realization of everything she's dreaming of in this moment that will in fact destroy her, possibly coupled with something darker lurking beneath the picture-perfect veneer belonging to her suitor? I can't decide yet, but you've got me intrigued to find out.

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