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Reading Reviews From Member: Rumpelstiltskin
  
507 Reviews Found

Review #1, by RumpelstiltskinMaking a Broken Heart: Making Excuses

21st September 2017:
Hello!

This piece absolutely broke my heart (but I'm surprisingly okay with the way you handled the twist of events).

I felt so bad for Molly, though! Apparently, Chris is a jerk -- who just avoids someone instead of telling them that they were no longer interested/seeing somebody else! Jeesh, this guy.

I love that this happened though because it's more realistic than a happily ever after.

As a stand-alone chapter, it held its own nicely and it tied into the other two pieces in a tearful conclusion.

Excellent work overall. I'll be announcing winners on the Forums and possible also on twitter/tumblr.

Thanks so much for entering, Lo! And forgive me for being SO very late with these reviews!

-Rumpel

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Review #2, by RumpelstiltskinMaking a Broken Heart: Making a Friend

21st September 2017:
Hey, I'm back for the second piece!

I love the feeling of kinship during Molly's interaction with Misty -- Molly's so kind to the house elf, and I find it extremely sweet. Misty also seems to be exceptionally fond of Molly, which is equally as sweet.

Of course, I love how it ties into the last piece with Christopher popping down to the kitchens just as Molly's there.

Molly's broom is clearly important to her, and reasonably so, given her aspirations. When she tumbled to the ground during her failed trick, the first question she asked regarded the wellbeing of her broom (I forgot to mention this is my last review) and now, she's clearly disturbed by the idea of her broom being gnawed on.

I also find it hilarious that Christopher is messing with Flint by 'spiking' his sundae. What I love more is Molly taking a HUGE scoop of the whipped cream as they were trying to escape McGonagall! Luckily, it was only in the ice cream.

Aw, they kissed! That's so sweet! (And all she had been looking for were some blueberry muffins, I love that line).

Another great job with the stand-alone story, and it tied in with the previous chapter well!

Looking forward to the piece!

-Rumpel

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Review #3, by RumpelstiltskinMaking a Broken Heart: Making Mistakes

21st September 2017:
Hey, Lo! I'm finally here for the Companion Piece Challenge (I was taken away by real-life shortly after the challenge ended, but now I'm back).

I love how the imagery creates such a sensation that sucks the reader right in as Molly begins speeding around the Quidditch pitch. I mean, there's absolutely fantastic imagery here.

I also really enjoyed the transition from flying to falling. Molly's tried very hard to do this trick and once she has it, shes' absolutely soaring (mentally and physically), but then when it fails, and she's falling it must have been horrifying. I love how you tied the flying part into a new magic and the falling part into physics.

I like how you threw in the bit about levitation charms only being able to affect clothing and not people. Also, ouch. That must REALLY hurt.

Molly's reaction to Christopher already knowing who she is was sweet! I also enjoyed how he cared enough to check to see if she was alright when he saw her fall, and fixed her wrist, to boot!

As a stand-alone story, it works rather nicely -- a sweet little vignette into the life of Molly Weasley II and the day she met Christopher. I'm looking forward to how it ties in with the remaining pieces!

-Rumpel

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Review #4, by RumpelstiltskinTo Glory: Percy Weasley

18th September 2017:
Hello! I'm back for the final piece of this!

Percy's one of those characters that's usually hit-or-miss for me. I think sometimes that people don't quite get just who Percy is (and usually wield him as a secondary character, anyway). In this, I think you've captured him nicely.

What I liked most was that not only did you capture his work-ethic and worry, but you were able to show his thought process behind why he distanced himself from his family and buried himself in his work. He doesn't want to be like his family -- he wants so much more. At least, that's what he thinks at this point in canon.

Standing alone, and once again, this is a great little vignette on Percy. As a companion to the other two pieces, I thought this did a nice job carrying the theme of 'glory' and snippets of characterization/motivation of three different people.

Great job!

Once I've finished reviewing and filling out the rubrics of all the entrants, I will be posting the results on the Forums (and possibly through Twitter/Tumblr as well).

Thanks so much for entering!

-Rumpel

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Review #5, by RumpelstiltskinTo Glory: Gilderoy Lockhart

15th September 2017:
Hello again! :)

I adore how Gilderoy's penchant for lying and exaggeration pops right out at the reader right from the beginning. His gasconading tale of his first accidental magical happening in combination with his mother's response of throwing him a lavish party (with a real dragon, to boot) made me laugh. The characterization is just too perfect in this.

And he would have a ton of autobiographies, too :p. I also love the continued characterization through the scene where he decided if he wasn't particularly talented at something, then it wasn't worth his time as well as his response to not being paid attention to.

As a standalone chapter, I really enjoyed this depiction of Gilderoy, and I thought you did an excellent job as far as characterization went. As a companion to the first piece, I thought it was a nice follow-up, keeping the theme of 'to glory' throughout. I especially liked that you achieved this with two very different characters in very different ways.

Looking forward to reading the final piece in this!

-Rumpel

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Review #6, by RumpelstiltskinTo Glory: Tom Riddle

14th September 2017:
Hello! I'm finally here for the Companion Piece Challenge now that I'm back. If you prefer these reviews elsewhere, please feel free to message me on the Forums and I'll be happy to transfer them for you.

I enjoyed this small vignette, catching a glimpse into the making of Lord Voldemort when he was merely Tom Riddle. I also love his manic, borderline crazed personality. It's so fitting for who he is. I also am a huge fan of his opposition to the finality of death and why he knew he had to find another option for his mortality.

Overall, I think this piece stands extremely well on its own. Its plot is strong enough to carry its own weight, which is a huge part of this challenge. Of course, I'm looking to forward to seeing how the other two pieces fit together with this one!

Excellent job so far! I look forward to reading the next piece.

-Rumpel

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Review #7, by RumpelstiltskinToday: Today

14th September 2017:
You're killing me with sad with these!

I like this piece following up "Live With Myself" particularly because we're transitioning from Severus trying to find the will to live into his moment of death many years later.

Again, you've tied the line "Can I cry now?" into this, and it has an absolutely beautiful effect. Severus has forced himself to be strong throughout losing Lily from his life, losing her to death, and then having to carry on to protect her son (who he's carried resentment for, nonetheless), and finally doesn't have to be strong.

And in death, he finally finds peace.

It's so sad.

It's overall strong enough to stand on its own, and creates a powerful story when read in combination with the other two pieces.

Overall, I think you've done a lovely job with this challenge. Once I've finished reading and filling out the rubrics for all of the participants and entries, I will be announcing winners on the Forums (and possibly Twitter and/or Tumblr).

Thanks so much for your submissions and I apologize for such a long gap between the Challenge end date and the reviews!

-Rumpel

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Review #8, by RumpelstiltskinLive With Myself: Live With Myself

14th September 2017:
Hello again.

This piece is so heartbreaking. Severus has to deal with the aftermath of Lily's death, and it's killing him. He's partially blaming himself because he chose his love for power and dark magic over her (time and time again). Now, it's too late.

I think the beginning was filled with some powerful imagery, and I really commend you on that. As far as Severus' Patronus is concerned, I'm really digging that he summoned it to find comfort.

"Could he cry now?" This packed a punch. Everything Severus had to endure, and he still is wondering if he has to be strong. Furthermore, his giving up seemed extremely likely at this point.

Again, when you tie it back to canon with the discussion with Dumbledore as means for Severus to have a will to live was done nice.

I thought the ending of this was just as powerful when Severus finds a will to live, is still left to wonder HOW. This stands alone as a piece exceptionally well, and I think it followed up the falling out piece nicely.

-Rumpel

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Review #9, by RumpelstiltskinI Can't: I Can't

14th September 2017:
Hello! I'm *finally* here for the Companion Piece Challenge after having been on hiatus. If there's anywhere else you'd prefer your challenge reviews, please feel free to PM me on the Forums and I can always transfer them for you.

I really enjoyed the overall idea of this piece. Not only does it stand by itself nicely, but it offers a glimpse into what could have happened between the fallout of the Mudblood-incident and what happens next in the series, while falling in line with canon.

I especially loved that you used that canon evidence from The Prince's Tale to support this scene. From Lily's tired insistence that she's done because he hasn't shown any signs of changing (he's still hanging out with his Death Eater friends -- meaning he's also probably still dabbling in dark magic -- and, to Lily, that means the world).

And then there's of course, the kicker -- where Lily calls him out on lying to her as children about her muggle-born status. But, of course, Severus still loves her, and it's suggested that Lily might love him back (as suggested by kissing him back) or at the very least has a desperate want of rebuilding their friendship. However, the fact that Severus hasn't changed, and is predicted that he will not change, Lily simply...can't.

So, yes, I think you've done an excellent job handling this scene as a stand-alone piece, and I can't wait to see how it relates to the other two pieces as a whole!

Excellent job!

-Rumpel

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Review #10, by RumpelstiltskinStorm: Fix You

14th September 2017:
Hello, I'm back for the final piece of the Companion Piece Challenge.

Ah, Harry during a childbirth scene. I love it. I love it especially since he's so absolutely terrified -- and who wouldn't be? Once again, I liked the idea that, because of everything Harry went through, he couldn't bear to hear the screams that have been continuously haunting him, forcing him to move himself away from his child-bearing wife. Because he couldn't lose her. Not now that he'd gotten her back.

I do really appreciate the flashback to the scene between the first two pieces, where Harry finds Ginny to win her back. I particularly enjoyed how you placed it in this last piece, where Harry is able to recall how he had 'just won her back'.

Of course, the ending is so tender and sweet, with the birth of James. I think you handled this piece very nicely. The moment Harry looks at his son in his arms and realizes that he now, officially, has a family of his own is absolutely beautiful.

As a stand-alone story, especially with the strength behind the flashback, I think it was handled exceptionally well. As the final companion to the other two pieces, I also found that it wrapped things up nicely, tying off any extra loose ends.

Overall, I found the three pieces quite enjoyable.

After I finish reading the other entries and filling out their rubrics, I'll be making announcements for the winners on the Forums (and possibly Twitter and/or Tumblr).

Thanks so much for participating, and sorry for the dreadfully long wait!

-Rumpels

Author's Response: I'm glad that him being away from Ginny during this moment was believable. It wasn't so much that he didn't want to be there, but he was so worried he was going to lose her that he just had to get out, you know? I'm so glad that came through well.

Thanks! I just had that last scene in my mind and I knew that was how I had to tie everything together; it stuck out and wouldn't go away XD

I'm so glad you enjoyed all three pieces!! I had a lot of fun writing them, and they were definitely a challenge as well.

Thank you so much for finally getting around to reviewing everything!! I always appreciate the feedback ♥


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Review #11, by RumpelstiltskinStorm: Demons

14th September 2017:
Hello, back again for the Companion Piece Challenge.

I really did enjoy how you've brought the element of Harry's continuous nightmares to this post-war piece. Especially given Harry's past, I can't imagine they would end. Also given the nature of his past, I can see where he could believe that any happiness he'd attained could be just as easily ripped away from him. Poor Harry.

I really enjoyed the Hinny element in this. I thought it was not only sweet, but I loved the interaction between the two. Ginny's able to talk Harry away from his demons, if only for a few moments. I also think that you've done a good job with both Harry and Ginny's characters in this piece, and I really do love the idea of Harry finding his strength in Ginny.

Your writing, once again, was quite lovely. Everything was clear and it flowed rather nicely. As a stand alone piece, I thought that it was strong as a vignette piece looking into a moment of Harry and Ginny's relationship. As a companion to the first, I found that it nicely followed 'Broken Dreams' in succession.

Nicely done, and I'll see you in the next section!

Author's Response: Hello again!

Yeah, I had a hard time believing that his nightmares would end, especially after the war too. I just want to snuggle him here -- which is weird for me XD

Thank you so much! Characterization is always important to me, especially canon characters, and particularly Ginny. Book!Ginny is my favorite, so it's always great to hear when I get her right.

I'm glad everything flowed rather nicely! I wasn't sure how it would look as a whole, so I'm glad everything is falling into place.



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Review #12, by RumpelstiltskinStorm: Broken Dreams

14th September 2017:
Hello! Now that I'm finally back, I'm *finally* getting to reviewing challenge entries for grading. (If you prefer your reviews elsewhere, please feel free to message me on the Forums and I can transfer them.)

I feel so badly for Harry. Not only has he already had an extremely tough life, but I can imagine that the aftermath of the war was probably one of the toughest of all (which is what you have exemplified in this piece).

In this predicament, I find it's often helpful for the protagonist to have something to focus on (something to give them that little extra will to live). You've done a good job with this by bringing Harry's affection toward Ginny Weasley into the picture, where he's focused on winning her back.

I particularly enjoyed the scene where he's venting to his dead parents at their grave. It's a sad moment, but it also allows for the reader to gain some insight into what Harry's feeling, which I'm certain will be useful for the rest of the pieces.

As part of a whole, I feel like this will be a strong start and makes a great introduction to the remainder of the companion stories. As a stand-alone story, it's mostly strong enough to stand on its own. Your writing is clear and concise, and I appreciate the job you did with Harry's characterization (especially since you are displaying him in such a grief-filled state).

Overall, I think you've done a good job so far, and I look forward to reading the next section.

-Rumpel

Author's Response: Hey Rumpel! Thanks for taking time for the reviews :)

I'm glad you liked the scene where he's at his parents' graves. I thought it was the best way to kind of show where Harry's head was at in this particular moment, and he probably felt like he didn't have a lot of other people he could talk to. Sure, people would listen, but they might not fully understand, y'know?

I'm glad you liked Harry's characterization! He's one of those characters I struggle to write the most, so I'm glad I managed to do an okay job here.

Thanks for the review! ♥


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Review #13, by RumpelstiltskinDark Beginnings: An Odd Child

19th March 2016:
Hello again! I'm here once more with team: Sassy Six, representing the Slytherin House over on the Forums.

It kills me to see such a low review count when your writing is so lovely.

At any rate, this is brilliant. I love how you've tied in the stark and dreary scenery description to set the mood for the rest of the chapter. It's one of my favorite places to start when beginning a chapter, especially with writing. It gives me solid ground to start from.

Your characterization of Tom as a boy is amazing. I love his creepy xenophobia and antisocial tendencies. I think you've hit the nail on the head with his apparent psychopathic behavior, especially when he (possibly accidentally) breaks the other boy's arm.

The speech patterns you've given him -- that clipped, formal way of speaking, the older form of subjugative etiquette -- is eerie and fitting. It also is thrilling to see it give way to this more powerful and commanding voice that he uses when he feels needed. It's really fantastic.

The level of complexity to him is truly fascinating. Helping Herbert with his washing, but obviously being the cause of him falling onto his already broken arm, and then receiving a treat for his 'good' behavior, and the pure level of manipulation is once, more, creepy. But it's absolutely perfect for Tom Riddle.

Anyway, fantastic job! I loved this. I will definitely stop by some time to read some more!

R E N C L M

Author's Response: Sorry I haven't replied before now, new grandchild kept me occupied.

Thank you for your very kind review of my work.

Tom has been a very interesting and, quite frankly, easy character to write. I work in a middle school and see a great many "Toms" in the halls. Thankfully they don't have the abilities that he possesses.

As my story progresses, I used what I thought a logical progression of his powers and his awareness of how different he is.

Yes, I watched the movies and read the book passages about him and then based his speech patterns on that material as well as on the language used in a number of other children in orphanages (Oliver Swift comes to mind not the same person but around the same era).

I have been building to this in the hopes that it will get recognition (Dobbys?) although I am also puzzled by the lack of interest in it (review and otherwise). I will continue to write because, like I said, he is a fascinating character to write.

Thanks again for your praise for my work and a new chapter shall be posted in the next day or so.


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Review #14, by RumpelstiltskinThe Curious Case of Luna Lovegood: Chapter 1: The Incident

19th March 2016:
Hello. I'm here with team: Sassy Six, representing Slytherin House on the Forums.

I absolutely love that you're taking a look into the workings of Luna Lovegood. She's definitely one of the characters that stands out in the original series, and she's most definitely odd. I'm especially excited, despite the tragedy that follows, that you've given the reader a look into who her mother was.

The characterization of Pandora was phenomenal. I absolutely love the way you've portrayed her -- just as sweet and odd as Luna, and I can definitely see just what she and Xenophilius had in common
(what drew them together).

I love her exuberance, the air that she gives off. I adore that she may come across crazy, but her work is important to her. I love that she's trying to find out the answer to the question, "What is magic?". It's all so perfect.

Which makes the ending of this chapter particularly sad. Her own research was her own demise, and it's heartbreaking, especially when Luna was there to witness it.

Fantastic job!

R E N C L M

Author's Response: Thank you very much for your wonderful review. I hope you continue to enjoy my most curious tale. The tale is already 30 chapters and 100 000 words and a lot happens. Yet Things have only just begun, I can't wait to share the rest of my story with you as I continue to upload it.

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Review #15, by RumpelstiltskinTrainwreck of 1978: Early Mornings

18th March 2016:
Alrighty, I'm back with Team: Sassy Six (formerly Seven), representing the Slytherin House on the Forums.

Evy's wake-up call is a thing from my nightmares, but it was just too funny to have skipped. Between the boys' gripes of protest (save Remus), the seeker pun, and Evy 'assulting' Remus, I was absolutely dying. I love the humor brought into this, and I think you did an amazing job with it.

Of course, the tension between Sirius and Evy could be cut with a knife. I wonder what'll happen there. ...or was this a Remus/Oc? I can't remember the pairings, and that's terrible of me. Either way, I'm dutifully satisfied. I do love the description of his eyes darkening -- I feel like that little piece alone really speaks about his personality. Given the typical 'playboy' persona, I think it hits the nail right on the head.

Also, poor James. Being tricked into waking up, believing that the Lily Evans is in his dorm, must have been disappointing ;).

I must admit, the chapter image was killing me. I had to find out why exactly Remus Lupin was the bacon police. Now that I have...my goodness, you certainly have humor down. Laughing aloud in a public area, and then being unable to stop the giggling has earned me some strange looks, but it was definitely worth it.

I mean, that entire conversation was perfect. "Growing what? Body hair?" Oh my goodness. The bacon fight will be immortalized in my mind. I also want to say that I really appreciated your dialogue in this scene. I loved the quick-action it created.

I'm very curious as to what exactly Evy did to earn that warning from McGonagall ;).

Oh Aiden. It's not his fault, but the fangirl and shipper in me is automatically saying, "nope". :p For now, he seems nice enough. :)

Truly fantastic chapter!

R E N C L M (*Go Slytherin!*)

Author's Response: I'm so glad that you liked this chapter and that you're enjoying my story so far! :) Thank you, again, for taking the time to read and review this story. The chapter images are always one of my favorite things because it helps give a quick glimpse as to what you'll be reading, as well as being a small physical portrayal of what I imagine the characters to look like.

Evy definitely has a rebelious side that will come out more as the chapters continue. Right now her and the boys are enjoying adolescence and being teenagers before the chaos of the upcoming war comes. Aiden is one of my favorite characters for multiple reasons that we'll see more of later. He's a Slytherin for a reason even if his pretty face is charming. ;)

Have a great week! :D


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Review #16, by RumpelstiltskinTrainwreck of 1978: Welcome Back to Hogwarts

2nd March 2016:
Hello! I'm here with team: the Sassy Seven from Operation Green with Envy, representing the Slytherin House over on the Forums.

I love AUs and Sirius ships so this should be a lot of fun!

Ahh, I love your descriptions, where do I start? There's something classic about describing the main characters up front, from the narrator/MCs perspective -- it's kind of like stretching before you exercise. Because James is so in love with Lily, I exactly blame Evy for being sick of her. I'm sure that James has completely driven Evy up a wall when it comes to Lily.

I do love that, though James and Evy are twins, they've those differences that set them apart. I think that it is an important aspect in stories to separate twins in some ways, as they aren't the same person (because I've read plenty of stories involving twins that haven't).

"...our baby werewolf..." I love how much this one line reveals about how Evy feels about Remus. It makes it feel like she has a nurturing feeling towards him, like she should protect him. It also minimizes the effect of the word werewolf, and I absolutely love this line and its effects.

Oh and then there's Sirius. Who broke her heart. Poor Evy, I've heard that Sirius has that effect on people. It must have been even more upsetting that she couldn't exactly avoid him, given her twin is his best mate. Those steps seem fairly rational, as girls tend to go through those stages as they grow (at least, my friends and I did). I can imagine James having temper tantrums because of this, though.

I do love the banter at the table, to James' absolute horror. I can't help but feel bad for the poor guy ;). Girls CAN be vile sometimes...the rumors that come out of their mouth's can be absolutely vicious and absurd!

Aiden seems...nice. ;) That was a hot kissing scene, for sure!

Thanks for the fun intro! I'll be back soon.
RENCALM

Author's Response: Hello! Thanks for taking the time to drop by this story and I love your team name by the way. :)

Your review made me smile and I'm glad you like this so far! I feel like I need to go through and do some edits for the earlier chapters because I published them in my excitement when I originally finished them. I just went through chapter two and submitted the edited version to the queue but it makes me really happy to know that new readers are still coming through!

I try to make my characters stand out in their own way so I really wanted Evy to be different from her brother while still struggling with usual adolescent stuff: boys, puberty, etc. We all know that this is the year in which the war begins to rise so I wanted to capture how life is like before everything hits the fan while still keeping it a bit AU. I think it's important to see everyone in their teenage stages because that's exactly what they were.

Evy loves the Marauders even if she'll never exactly admit to how much they really mean to her. Aidan is certainly on the list of people she cares about too, but in a different way. He's a complete dish. ;) I'm glad you liked the makeout scene!

You're welcome back any time! Happy reading. :D


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Review #17, by RumpelstiltskinLand of a thousand dances: Chapter 3

2nd March 2016:
It's Rumpel, back again with team: Sassy Seven from Op. GwE on the Forums.

I'm sure that the view from the Gryffindor tower must be absolutely breathtaking, and I can imagine why Lily would find solace in its tranquility.

I have never read a Marlene/Remus -- but you've just cracked open a whole new can of worms (typically I see Marlene/Sirius). I can totally dig a Marlene/Remus (where has this ship been all my life)! I also think that its sweet that Marlene came to Lily for advice. My headcanon says that they were friends. I absolutely agree with your Lily, that Marlene might bring Remus out of his shell a bit. I wonder what Marlene will think about Remus' lycanthropy, if she finds out.

Poor Lily. I know losing a loved one is difficult, and at least Petunia will be decent enough to put the picture on the grave for her. I think that you've exemplified Lily's kindness in her characterization many times, but it's highlighted (to me) especially while she tries to connect with her sister, even though it's repeatedly not reciprocated.

While Remus being gay crushes my little Marlene/Remus fantasy, it's totally cool. Now I'm rooting for WolfStar ♥ I am sad though that James really overreacted to finding out the news, and I feel bad that the news was found out and spread so quickly. Ideally, this will end up working in Remus' favor, and hopefully James gets over himself ;).

With the amount of kindness that Lily has in her, I'm certain that she will accept him for being a werewolf (or will she)? I certainly am excited to see what Sirius thinks about Remus' situation.

Another lovely chapter!
RENCALM

Author's Response: Hi again!
Remus described Lily as uncommonly kind in the Prisoner of Azkaban, so I thought that her kindness should be explored. Lily definitely isn't a flawless character. I won't comment on possible future relationships, but I will be making them as true to life as possible.

Thanks for reviewing!

All the best, Kat.


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Review #18, by RumpelstiltskinLand of a thousand dances: Chapter 2

2nd March 2016:
Back again with team: Sassy Seven from Slytherin House on the Forums.

(As a quick aside, I forgot to mention that if you are looking for a beta reader, there's an entire section on the Forums dedicated to finding one, if you're interested!)

I feel bad for Severus. His home life certainly is something that any child should be subjected to, and yet sadly are. I did enjoy that you added a reason for Severus' dad's action -- having been in the army. I haven't read many stories that justify his father's actions, and PTSD is a very real and terrifying thing to experience. Understandably, Severus wants him to stop, but I know that addiction is terribly difficult. Perhaps, in this AU, things will be looking up for Severus and his family. Who knows?

A Common Room for all Houses? That sounds like it could either be fantastic or complete chaos, and I'm really curious to how that turns out. Sev and Lily are such good friends, and I'm really glad that they have each other, especially given Severus' not-so-ideal life at home.

Since they have this wonderful inter-house friendship, I love that they tell Charlie that not all Slytherins are bad, even though he wants to be in Gryffindor. In fact, I know quite a few Slytherin's who are actually fantastic ;).

Professor Riddle is SO kind! There's a crazy difference here between what he was like in canon, and what he'd be like if he'd had a stable, loving home.

Can't wait to see what happens!
RENCALM

Author's Response: Thanks for reviewing! I never liked JK Rowling's explanation of Voldermort being unable to love because of a love potion. I thought the more human reason of being unable to love because he didn't know how to was better.

I'm glad you liked my story!

All the best, Kat


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Review #19, by RumpelstiltskinLand of a thousand dances: Chapter 1

2nd March 2016:
Hey there! I'm here with team: Sassy Seven from Operation Green with Envy (Slytherin House) on the Forums!

Understandably, Petunia is jealous of Lily's extraordinary life at Hogwarts, but I can't help but feel bad for Lily. It's obvious that Lily loves her sister, and it's heartbreaking that Petunia can't attempt to be happy for her. (And making me feel bad for your characters so early in a story is a fantastic thing!)

Severus and Lily's friendship is so, so sweet, and I'm wodering if Merope's death (or rather, lack thereof) will change the outcome of that friendship. I have to admit, as much as I enjoy James/Lily, there's a special place reserved in my heart for Snape/Lily, even if its the friendship part.

So, this was a nice introduction, and I'm excited to see how things turn out! What's going to change from canon and how much? This is why I love 'What ifs' and AUs so much, because they always keep me guessing!

Lovely start!
RENCALM

Author's Response: Thanks for reviewing. I've always been interested in the interactions between characters and how that influences behaviour, which is why I chose to include Lily's relationship with Petunia. The relationship between the sisters isn't something that you see very often. I'm thrilled that you like my story.

Best, Kat


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Review #20, by RumpelstiltskinOn Top of Things: Want to hear My Side of Things?

2nd March 2016:
Hey there! I'm here with team: Sassy Seven for Operation Green with Envy on the Forums (because Slytherin House is amazing)!

I love this idea! I can honestly say I've never had the pleasure of reading a story told from the Sorting Hat's point of view. The Sorting Hat does have an important job, and I laugh that it knows that about itself. I do feel bad for it, though, being ignored all term long until its needed to sort the students.

I haven't thought about the consciousness of the Hat until now, and it's doing those strange things like making me emphasize with it. It's a fantastic feat to affect your audience like this with an otherwise inanimate object. I keep laughing at my sympathy throuought, while the Hat tells of how difficult it is to think up a new song for every new year (but I suppose since it IS being ignored for the rest of the year, it has time to think), and especially because of all of the minds its had to peer into. That sounds like a tedious task.

I also really enjoy that sense of self-importance that it has, specifically at the end, where it pardons the reader to do its job.

Thanks for a great read!
RENCALM

Author's Response: Thanks for your very kind review. Actually, the idea for this story came about the time that I was finishing the third story in my Quidditch trilogy. The four stories all revolve around the thoughts of the objects involved.

I had wondered how the hat came up with the songs that we see in the books (but unfortunately not in the movies).

I often laughed while I was writing the story.

Thank you for your compliment about affecting my audience, it gives me the encouragement that I need to continue writing.

If you enjoyed this story please give my other stories a try and let me know how you feel about them.

Thanks for your kind words!
Evil Otter


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Review #21, by RumpelstiltskinSecrets: Chapter 1

17th February 2016:
How does a welcome to HPFF review sound?

I think that your characterization of Draco Malfoy is very believable. His animosity towards his actions in the war (and that towards Harry) is made evident in the first few paragraphs.

The way Harry responds to Draco's revelation of his sexual orientation was fantastic, because who could have ever suspected that Draco Malfoy preferred men?

It's terrible that Draco felt that he couldn't be who he truly was -- a man who liked other men -- because of what he father thought. I'm glad that Harry was there to change his mind.

THAT WAS SUCH A SWEET KISS!! ♥

You've done a great job with your first fanfiction! Welcome to HPFF!

-Rumpel

Author's Response: Hi rumpel!

thank you so much for this review it made me so happy to have such a nice welcome to HPFF!


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Review #22, by RumpelstiltskinIntroducing...: Introducing... James Potter

14th February 2016:
Hello, again! I'm here with prize review 2:2!

Ooooh I LOVE James' immediate arrogance! He's cool and cocky and reminds me a lot of what my head-cannon is for his two namesakes (James Potter I and Sirius Black). And why *wouldn't* he be awesomely amazing and fabulous at Quiddich d life in general! As he's (you've) said, he's the son of Harry Potter and Ginny Weasley! I adore his characterization.

I was really excited to find out what this problem would be, and I love how it's extended just a little longer so that the readers don't immediately know what the problem is. I also find it quite interesting that James doesn't like to talk to his friends and family about his problems, but rather, complete strangers. It's a great little quirk to his personality.

See? Meghan only *thinks* she's not good at anything! She's a good listener :). I think the huge, clashing characteristic differences is a fantastic piece of the story. It creates a highly humorous contrast.

I find it even more funny that James Potter, as awesome as he is, is having a problem impressing a girl that he likes. James' response to the ghost bit was particularly hysterical, might I add.

The fact that he wants to impress the girl by trying to raise his Muggle Studies grade is priceless, but I'm sure that Meghan can help him out with that.

I sense so many troublesome shenanigans ahead! This is going to be a riot.

Another lovely chapter! Great job!

-Rumpel

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Review #23, by RumpelstiltskinIntroducing...: Introducing... Meghan Abrams

14th February 2016:
Hello! I'm here with your two reviews that you've won during the "Guess the Present" game on the Forums! (1:2)

First of all, I love how absolutely ordinary the main character Meghan, is. There's something special about an ordinary character that makes the story a little more extraordinary. It also makes it a lot easier for readers to connect with the character, which is a special feat. For me, it especially happened with the talent for plant killing -- I have that "wonderful" talent, too ;).

I also really enjoyed the bit of sarcastic edge that is emanating through your character and into the narration. It really brings her personality to life. It also adds this special brand of humor, and I absolutely love that you broke through that fourth wall for just a moment. It's a personal favorite technique.

I thought her reaction to the panicking, help-seeking James was perfect! It was an amazing end to this introductory chapter and a very nice hook into the next chapter. I can't wait to see what it is that James urgently needs help with, and from somebody who has been described as someone who is not particularly exceptional in any way!

Brilliant job!
-Rumpel

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Review #24, by RumpelstiltskinDrive: Drive

12th February 2016:
Hello, I'm here with review 1 of 2 that you've one for correctly guessing the picture in the "Guess the Present Graphics" Challenge!

Wow, your ability to write beautiful descriptions is amazing! I mean the opening was an incredibly strong hook that not only set the scene, but the mood as well (like some serenity after the storm, which I think is an accurate theme for the story that follows).

Pairing Oliver Wood with Lavender Brown wasn't something that I had even thought of, to be quite honest. After reading this, however, I'm definitely waving the Oliver/Lavender banner on my top ships (at least, your version of them anyway).

Being brought together by such a horrendous tragedy could definitely have it's positives and negatives. The negatives of course would be that they're lives were forever altered and somewhat damaged by being bitten, but having someone who understands -- who truly understands -- must feel like a godsend.

While his Quiddich career is in the gutter, Lavender looks at him like he's the champion of the world. Although she's been physically marred by Fenrir, Oliver looks at her like she's the most beautiful goddess he'd ever laid eyes on. It's so sweet that I almost want to cry!

Finally, I love the message this gives off: the sense of freedom, being with somebody who you love and who loves you as you leave everything else behind. It sounds absolutely magical!

This was incredible! I loved it so much! ♥

-Rumpel

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Review #25, by RumpelstiltskinNot My Own: The Ultimatum

12th February 2016:
Hey Marshal, I'm here with the second of your reviews that you won for the "Guess the Present Graphics" Challenge :).

You are doing an absolutely spectacular job with James and the position he's in. The amount of empathy he's building for Remus -- given being able to feel the pain and fatigue that Remus is constantly struggling with, not to mention dealing with the nightmares, the living situation, and the people he has to be around -- is spot on, in my opinion.

As a character, I think it also assists in James' development once he's finally able to understand what exactly has been happening with Remus ("
For the first time, he began to realize that while he and Sirius had made a game of things, it wasnít as much of one for Remus as they thought.") What kills me though is the foreshadowing in that same paragraph, where James wants to apologize to Remus when he sees him again (and then later, when he wants to speak to Remus about his living situation). I'm getting the sneaking suspicion that James will never actually see Remus again... *Sigh* I'm also getting the suspicion that this story will eventually result in tears (for me).

It's also drawing in the reader's empathy, which as great feat.

I like the idea of the hierarchy within the werewolf society. It reminds me of the natural order of things in a wolf pack and, given Fenrir's stance on his purpose and power behind being a werewolf, it's no surprise that he and his followers would adhere to this instinctual want/need for a hierarchy.

Rhea is an awesome character. I mean, I hate her, obviously, she's a villain, but she's a villain done right. She has this sort of sensually quiet evil to her and it makes her *terrifying*. It's no wonder why she's second-in-command.

I hate the awful predicament that James has been placed in, too. He has to now live in fear of Fenrir's wrath (and God knows what he'll do) or appease him/Rhea by turning a child (or someone). Obviously Remus wouldn't do it, and neither would James. It's just an awful predicament.

And that was quite a suspenseful hook into the next chapter! I wonder what'll happen...

Lovely chapter!

-Rumpel

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