Reading Reviews From Member: Cannons
  
236 Reviews Found

Review #1, by CannonsIn The Black: A Chance Meeting

27th November 2014:
Best Dumbledore characterisation ever. Or would that be going too far? I don't think so, really enjoyed the conversation between Dumbledore and Sirius. It was fun to read from a different POV as well.

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Review #2, by CannonsIn The Black: The Letter

27th November 2014:
Hufflepuff got smashed and there was a fight!

I really like how you showed Snape's home life in this chapter and tied it together with Beth's. Very neatly done!

Towards the end though when she wants to keep a secret...bad idea Beth!

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Review #3, by CannonsIn The Black: Concession

27th November 2014:
Awkward breakfast scenes are brilliant to read. Sirius acted exactly as I image he would in that situation.

Hopefully Hufflepuff get smashed in the next chapter!

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Review #4, by CannonsIn The Black: Rescue and Revelation

27th November 2014:
What a fast paced chapter and Beth couldn't transform! :( It's clever how you just weaves this cannon moment in to your own plot.

I wasn't expecting Beth to tell Snape and I'm not sure if she should have done, it probably should have been a group decision. Tensions were running high then.

I really wanted a duel at the end between the two, it is interesting to consider who would win that one.

I think Snape took that pretty well, but I can't wait to see what he does with the information, if anything.

Pretty tasteless joke though by Sirius, kind of went to far didn't he! :P

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Review #5, by CannonsIn The Black: Panic

27th November 2014:
Snape is heading for trouble!

I enjoyed the Peter and Beth scene and it made me smile when he'd gotten something wrong in the first line.

The part where Beth transforms was just so visual, I can see her transforming just as she steps.

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Review #6, by CannonsIn The Black: Seeking Refuge

27th November 2014:
I loved this chapter! You wrote Snape in such a normal way, which I don't normally see in marauders fics. It's still him but he cares and has feelings as any teenager would. I really liked the fact that you didn't go Over the top with him straight away.

What really stood out was how his 'friends' aren't really his friends at all, they just happen to be in the same house, things could have been so different!

The exchange between Beth and himself was great to read. Fair play to him for not completely snapping her head off.

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Review #7, by CannonsIn The Black: Unsuspected, Unexpected

27th November 2014:
:D
I really enjoyed this chapter, it was such a neat idea that Snape had at the beginning of the chapter to pretend that he knew what was going on.mi really did think Beth was going to say something she was going to regret for a second.

As always, the thing I notice about your writing is how you keep the plot and the story moving. Sentences like 'As the weeks inched by...' And 'the first moon passed without incident '

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Review #8, by CannonsUpping The Ante: The Bouncing Properties of Dimes

25th November 2014:
Hey, review swap! :)

I'm pretty sure that I read some of the previous version of this story so it will be interesting to see if I remember anything, because that was probably a year ago and I don't know how much you have changed.

Alexandra is a different kind of Ravenclaw, her remark about books not being as important really stuck out and it was quite refreshing. Sometimes stereotypes need to be broken and without getting in to a whole different debate, just because you are in a certain house, doesn't mean that you are a carbon copy, exact image of perfection according to the houses 'stereotypes'.

I liked the opening scene with the Quidditch pitch and the detail of her name on her robes digging in to her back. It was a neat idea to have her change positions as well.

The way you wrote Tom into the bit with team huddle where he 'jumped' when his name was called made it really believable. It would be hard to be the only new person on a team.

I feel like I kind of know who is who but would need a couple more chapters to really get the characters in to my mind. I'm liking the friendship/beater duo though at the moment.

The little interchange between the two teams was fun to read, James' joke was funny but cruel. He also seems a little too full of himself at the moment, I'm not sure if that is just the bad humour though. :P


I was hoping to go into Quidditch as a profession somehow, but Flitwick had told me that if I didnít have a fall back career, then I was deluded. - I liked this line, very much something I image Flitwick would say.

Thank you for the swap! It was interesting to read this again. :)

Fin

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Review #9, by CannonsSaving Severus Snape : 31st August 1976

24th November 2014:
Hi Meg, I was going to review this yesterday when I first read it but I didn't have time, so I'm back now with my review. :)

I have to keep separating this story with your other story at the moment! :P They keep merging in my mind, but that's my fault because I have read next to none time travel fics. Only this one and another but that was totally different!

I'm really loving this so far and hopefully you have another chapter on the way? ;)

For a second I thought she was going to put in to Slytherin and that would have been incredible. Ravenclaw is fine though! It will be interesting to see what sort of reaction she will have with the Marauders and Snape in this. I'm guessing she is going to have to pick a side. If she wants to help Snape and is trying to hang around him then the Marauders aren't going to like Hermione just on principle alone. So I am super interested to see how that pans out.

Love Hermione's reaction to everything that is going on so far. A little confused/angry at what's going on but coping extremely well as Hermione would in a situation like this. She is questioning her decision though and that is what makes it realistic.

Really hoping that Dumbledore knows what he is doing. Or rather, knew what he was doing.

Pomfrey has changed, a nice touch. Adds to your world.

Really excellent job as usual, particularly with Dumbledore. Can't wait to see how this progresses!

Fin

Author's Response: Hey Fin! :D

Aww no worries! I'm thrilled that you continued on! :D

Haha yeah, they're going to be quite a bit different from one another, despite being set in the same era. A lot more secretive in this story than she is in the other one. I love time travel fics. They're my guilty pleasure. :)

Eek! I'm really, really happy to hear that! Yep! The next chapter is in the queue as we speak!! :D

After everything that Hermione had been through in the past year, I don't think I could have done that to her. Imagine her in Slytherin and hearing all that horrible stuff about Muggle-Borns. Not to mention, students basically hero-worshipping Voldemort. I think that would have been a little traumatic on the poor thing. I figured Ravenclaw would be the best option for her. We know from canon that she was strongly considered for that house, so out of the other three, I think she'd have the easiest time easing into Ravenclaw.

Well, I don't want to say *too* much, or make this a spoilery response, but she definitely won't be as close to James, Sirius and the rest of them in this story.

I'm so thrilled that Hermione seems authentic. I really want to try to keep this story as true to canon as I can, so it's very awesome to hear that I'm portraying her well. :D

Oh Dumbledore. He might... ;)

Aww thank you!! ♥

Thank you so much Fin! I'm really excited that you're reading on and that you're enjoying this! I hope you like the next chapter, it should be out really soon!!

xoxo Meg


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Review #10, by CannonsKissing in Private: Part Three

24th November 2014:
Back again for part 3 :D

Man, this first part just smashed me right in the feels. I must say you have a knack obviously for writing children, there were several things that I could pick out that highlighted this. However I really felt this line was exactly something that children would say - Victoire broke character and switched back to her normal voice to say, "No, this is before that."

Teddy though, man, this is something that obviously has stuck with him through most of his life and that's really sad. Especially as he feels Victoire is out of his league. The memory of him 'playing house' would obviously cause his some pain because he thinks he will never get the chance to do that for real! (or am I reading too much into this?:P)

I really like the way you set the chapters up though, usually with a memory, they really are starting to build up Teddy's character in my mind. What was perfect about this memory though was the fact that he still felt ridiculed and stupid and this wasn't connected to his netamorphmagus abilities.

(I'm reviewing as I read. Just in case stuff doesn't make sense :P)

So it did have a lasting impact on him, although he didn't realise it at the beginning. Such a good point you make in the second paragraph, very realistic thought process. I really like how Teddy questions things that other people wouldn't, even if that may be part of his problem sometimes. It's ironic though, given the title of your story. :P

Oh, no it gets worse. He finds out that Victoire is kinda using him! To stare at guys, which in turn makes him feel even more inadequate! And Derek is the guy who was being a complete * * * in the first chapter right?

Haha, correct me if I am wrong and looking in to this way too much but is the devils horns a reference because Teddy thinks Victoire is playing 'devils advocate'? If it is you are a genius! That's been my favourite part so far. :D

Again the feelings of inadequacy with the 'little pet' reference. So much character development with Teddy at the moment.

Victoire thinks he is only saying Derek is a git because he is jealous. wow. I'm kinda mad at her right now. :P

Runa! I want to marry her right now. :P Runa/Teddy please :P I really like that Teddy now has someone that isn't 'family' (he isn't family technically, but you know what I mean) to talk to, even if they are just studying at the moment.

I really didn't expect to like this story as much as I am beginning to. I really like the way you have written Teddy. I sort of don't like Victoire at the moment.

Can't wait for the next chapter :)

Fin

Author's Response: Hi Fin! Thank you so much for coming back to review chapter 3! I'm so glad you like this story.
It is a huge compliment that you think I can write children well. In all of my writing classes in college, I always tried writing children and my classmates and professors always warned me like Oh you gotta be careful, writing kids is hard... and I'm just like... okay? Maybe that means my mind is still that of a child because it comes so naturally to me =P Haha! Thanks so much!
You got it! Teddy is holding on to the fact that Victoire at one point, even in a fantasy land, wanted to marry Teddy. Also I'm thrilled that you understood that he was feeling ridiculed at that point! I was worried that because I didn't have the physical manifestation of the Metamorphmagus abilities, that wouldn't come across. But you got it! So I'm happy. :)
I'm a little confused by your comment about how Teddy questions things that other people wouldn't, and the irony of the title. Would you mind expanding a little? I'm not being defensive or debunking your thoughts at all! Seriously, I love that you are reading so deep into this and finding all this great stuff. Honored. I just love talking about stories and so I'd like to discuss it :)
Yes that is the same Derek that was teasing Ted at the beginning. It's interesting that you say Victoire was using Ted in this scene, because in my mind when I was writing it, she wasn't doing it SOLELY for the purpose of getting a better view of Derek, if that makes sense. It was sort of a convenience that she happens to be friends with Ted and it happens to be a good viewing spot.
That is such a cool interpretation. Unfortunately, the genius is all yours because I did not think of that =P Thanks though!
I'm glad you like Runa and the relationship that's developing! You'll have to read on and see, huh...? ;)
I'm so flattered that you ended up liking this story so much! It means the world to me that you are committed to reading and reviewing this story. Thank you so much.


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Review #11, by CannonsBound by Love: # 1--Drooble's Best Blowing Gum (Frank)

24th November 2014:
Hi again! :)

So I have been kind of waiting for this chapter to see where you take this truly unique story. :)

As I was reading it through I was having an enjoyable read and then you absolutely blew me out of the water with that ending. I was never expecting that and I actually had to go back and read it again to make sure I hadn't missed anything and read it properly.

I really, really like the concept of this story, with how Neville get's to learn more about his parents past and how they met and everything. Which must be so precious to Neville since he grew up without them.

One thing that I loved was how you showed prejudice to another house and Hufflepuff. It's always Slytherin but it's genius to turn the table and have someone be insulted just because they are associated with Hufflepuff.

With that cliffhanger I am deifiantly going to be stopping by again and hopefully soon. ;)

Fin

Author's Response: Hello Fin welcome back and thank you very much for the review! :) :D

Hehehe thank you so much! I've been told in the past by several that I'm notoriously terrible (or is that evil) when it comes to cliffhangers and I try to use them whenever it's possible and fits--that was just TOO good of one to NOT implement.


Thank you--it's coming along nicely and I'm really enjoying writing it, as well as watching with how Frank is developing as a character--he's turning into a LOT of fun to write and makes me giggle quite a bit! I'm anxiously looking forward to seeing how Alice comes along when I get to her :).

*chuckles* Thanks! I have a confession to make here on that one: I kinda never really liked Gryffindor (sorry!) to be honest as yes, they -do- come out to me as being favored among the others and well in my thoughts every House has its' bad apples like Slytherin has its' good ones (ie. Snape). Hufflepuff is a nod to my own House and it just seemed to fit :).

Thank you SO very much again for your thoughts and the review--I'm humbled and very happy that you enjoyed it! :)

--Karen


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Review #12, by CannonsGone: The Disappearance

23rd November 2014:
Hey Joey!

So I hope you don't mind me scrolling this far down your AP but this one really caught my eye. I love the idea of waking up one day and everything is gone. I don't actually want it to happen obviously but it is am intriguing thought to ponder from time to time.

Anyway on to the story and review! I'm going to review this as I go because I feel like that is more fun for you to read my instant reactions. :P

I love this line. - I was just a people person. That may have been the most ironic part of all. - It's just dripping with irony and I must admit I almost laughed. Just the fact that it feels so far as if he has given up and this will be his last stream of thoughts and then there is that sentence right in the middle. And while I nearly laughed it is actually extremely sad. As so far it seems as if Albus is the worst sort of person this could happen to. A people person surround by no people...(btw, I found it interesting that Albus wasn't the brightest of his age as my headcannon is that he is somewhat of a prodigy!)

I loved the part where when he was of age used magic for the smaller thins. Kind of like Fred and George. :/

Also Harry using muggle music to recover after the war? What is this genius? I wish I had thought of that! Love it even more since you used 'muggle music' and as we know Harry didn't have the best experience with muggles. That's one of my favourite things about his character that he picks his battles. (does that make sense?) :P
Basically I love this even more now because you dropped in that sentence!

'I was surprised to see that no one seemed to be home downstairs and even more shockingly; there was no breakfast prepared in the kitchen.' - Used to the good life is Albus? :P

Literally this next part made the hair stand up on the back of my neck. For his house to be empty is one thing and Scorpius' the same but the Burro and the Ministry of Magic? Woah, that's a scary thought. It puts it all into perspective. I just have an image of Albus standing in the gigantic entrance hall to the Ministry of Magic and it to be empty. Not a sound. That would terrify me and with Albus being a people person and everything...

Loved this line as well - She was our resident photographer; or in her words, memory maker. - Such a simple line but so powerful.

I really liked this last paragraph because it was so believable, it is human nature to make the best of a bad situation, in most cases at least, so I really liked that you showed the reader that he carried on and actually flourished despite the problems he faced.

Then he had a setback with the memories. Maybe it was a setback maybe that was the beginning of the end for him? It's neat that you have left it up to the reader. I personally, despite my own stories, would like to believe that he wouldn't give in.

Overall this was a fantastic read, very, very believable which is important given the topic. I would love to know how you did in the challenge?

Also you simply have to turn this in to something more then a one shot. This story has so much potential for expansion it is unreal. I would love to read about more of this world if you ever decide to write more.

Thanks for the swap Joey, I had so much fun reading and reviewing this!

Fin

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Review #13, by CannonsAn inky black heart.: The ebony vessel.

23rd November 2014:
Hi, here for our review swap!

I picked this because I recently attempted the 'Every Word Counts' challenge myself recently and I am in the process of writing a one shot about Snape. So it was kinda perfect!

This was interesting to read and I really enjoyed it. It's so interesting to read these pieces because I know now, having attempted the challenge myself, every sentence is worth something to the story.

This line was perfect! - The word love turns you into an obelisk of obsidian.

As I read through this I was thinking how unique this style of writing is. I haven't come across anything quite like it on here before. Even though there was nothing but thoughts in this, there was a pace to it. You really felt as if you were in Snape's mind and his thoughts were just rolling and rolling. (don't know if that will even makes sense to you :P)The repetition defiantly added to the overall effect superbly.

I also think this is a pretty good representation of the 'relationship' between Snape and Lily, very realistic with the obsessive thoughts and feelings.

At first I was a little taken aback by how very dark Snape's thoughts were and how I never really thought he would come across SO dark. Once I thought about it though I realised that these are his thoughts and when we read/see him normally he obviously doesn't let his thoughts dictate his mannerisms/actions. He comes across as a very intelligent man, so ultimately I think these thoughts could be believable especially as they are about Lily.

Thanks for the read! :)

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Review #14, by CannonsChicks Before Broomsticks: Hot Dance

23rd November 2014:
FINALLY! :D

I'm so pleased that I didn't have to wait any longer! This was awesome and now I just can't wait until the next chapter. ;)

She got to play! Yes, I was so happy for here and fair play to Salvador for letting Hollie have her chance in the spotlight, especially with all the media coverage surrounding the game. I'm assuming he let her play because a broken hand/wrist is nothing for a wizard healer.

That reporter deserved a right good dressing down, to bad Hollie just about kept her temper in check. Molly is working the game. I thought it was a Weasley, I just didn't know which one.

I really want to know what Roxanne was saying to Molly when she dragged her aside. Obviously Molly was getting a bit ahead of herself in Roxanne's eyes.

Yeah, the paparazzi...

I can see through you Roxanne. :P

I really want Hollie to get invited to the Burrow/Roxanne's house for dinner, that would be the best thing ever. :L

You take all of these topics and make them your own. The way you input the 'media' in to this story is what makes it so good!

Keep writing and finish chapter 8! :D

I loved it :)

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Review #15, by CannonsBehind You: Run

22nd November 2014:
Hi, thanks for swapping with me! :)

I really liked the first couple of sentences which really set the tone for the rest of the piece. They are especially thought provoking because we don't know who they are about at the moment and when they are matched with the title, they come across as especially powerful.

I was going to review it part by part as and when I felt I needed to say something, but at first I couldn't quite grasp what exactly was going on and then I got to the end. I can seriously say that this is one of the best one shots I've read.
There is so much depth to this piece it is crazy.

Tell me if I am wrong because I feel as if a lot of this could be up to the reader and how they interrupt it.

It's such an interesting idea that you've written about, someone who is so powerful, that even some of the teachers at Durmstrang are wary of him. Someone who can match Dumbledore and have half of Europe under his power can be undone by simply, himself? I'm presuming that the doppelganger is just in his mind?

It's interesting to think that he is running from himself, at least that is what I got from this. All his life searching for power and building fortresses and crazy things like that but it seems as if he is using these things to hide the bits/doppelganger within himself. As if the more power he has on the outside, the more control he will have of himself on the inside.

I really loved how that even in his fragile physical state he still called Voldemort a 'boy', that was really powerful. It shows that however disconnected he had become from the world, the brilliance of his mind was still there somewhere.

Really, after reading the whole thing twice I love the way you have started the whole thing.

I feel as if the 'doppleganger' could symbolise some of his regret? He knows what is right and wrong and maybe that is why he was different from Voldemort in the end. The worse his actions were the bigger and more unstable he became.

Honestly I had a lot of fun reviewing and reading this. I don't know if anything I mentioned was what you were going for but I would love to know.

Ultimately what I am going to take away from this
is no matter how powerful you are on the outside, you can still be taken down from the inside!

Thanks for writing this!

Fin

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Review #16, by CannonsIn The Black: The Confrontation

22nd November 2014:
Haha I loved this chapter! I remember reading this one because I read your author notes and realised just how annoying it would be if I would have had to wait for a new chapter to be uploaded!

I think that Remus is quickly becoming one of my favourites. He is so calm and gives the group the balance that they all need. I really found it amusing though when he raised an eyebrow at Beth over his book when she had her little outburst.

Snape is slowly starting to figure it all out, they really do need to be more careful!

I love the tension that Beth is feeling trying not to let her feelings slip and James is noticing the hints I am sure!

The ending was perfect as well!

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Review #17, by CannonsWake up, Rose.: The Art of Getting By

22nd November 2014:
All caught up now Joey! Eagerly awaiting the next chapter as well. ;)

So yeah, three chapters in and I don't hate this story. Sometimes I find first person stories too annoying, as in the character is having a conversation with the reader, but yours defiantly isn't like that at all.

You still get the humour across but its done naturally and subtly. For instance the shower washing away some of the stress. I like things like that.

You've written Hugo so well. I really do like him, very protective and rather like Ron in some ways. I'm rather hoping he decides to invite Albus for a bout of 'muggle duelling' :P

The more I read the more I feel like Dominique is not someone I would want to be friends with, she seem like such a manipulative little...

I'm really hoping this was just some stupid, drunken idea to spike Rose's drink because otherwise it would be so brutal for her. I really hope they all sort it out eventually though. :P

Oooo the silent treatment! Love it. I feel sorry for Albus now though weirdly, now I am hoping he was just Dominique's puppet in this whole charade.

Rose can cast some powerful spells? What a surprise :P Seriously though, that was fun to read as was Spinnet's comments. Is that Alicia btw or am I completely off the mark?

This was comedy gold -
ďIíll be next. One time I went on a blind date and it turned out the guy was my cousin,Ē says Happy. - honestly I laughed at that and Demi has a crush on Hugo. :P

I feel like with that ending this story is going to really start 'heating up', I have no idea how you are going to approach the elephant in the room but I know it is going to be awesome!

This is a great read so far!

Fin

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Review #18, by CannonsWake up, Rose.: It's Kind of a Funny Story.

22nd November 2014:
Back again Joey!

This was so good! Rose reacted just as I hoped towards Albus. Yeah, I loved that section although it did make me laugh when Albus said -"Dom was in on it too!" Albus says apologetically." - as if that makes it any better for him. Now he is probably going to have two very annoyed females on his hands.

I was surprised to find out that Scorp hadn't in fact been slipped a love potion and it was only Rose that has, that certainly changes the dynamics of the situation does it!

So Rose has held a grudge against him since first year for a playful tease? Ouch, that must hurt Scorp if he really does like her. I'm unsure how he will react if he finds out that, that night only happened, because AL slipped Rose a love potion. Or does he already know that?

You write teenage girls really well :P Every line was a winner in the dormitory, my favourite was the one about the tattoo! :P

Anyway, can't wait to read on!

Fin

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Review #19, by CannonsIn The Black: Unforeseen Suspicions

22nd November 2014:
Back again!

I have decided that what I really do like most about your writing is the connection from the previous chapter, you always have those first few lines which drags you back in to Beth's world! (I've worded that dreadfully, but hopefully you know what I mean!)

Haha, they are such a team aren't they, it's great how they always have each others backs. One second they are all in there own worlds, Beth watching Lily smiling at James etc and then Peter speaks and the reaction is instant! I really found that funny! The image of Beth eating Peter!

I can't remember if there is any darker reason why Peter doesn't want everyone at the transformations, but my instinct is telling me there isn't. I will read on though, because I feel like that is important for some reason!

As we know what happens to Peter, the line where he looks a little scared has even more meaning, especially as he isn't even in any immediate danger! I like how you're building his character though. You've said he's a worrier, not the most tactful and not as brave as the others.

Snape's line here 'I've been watching you for years' - not creepy at all!

I liked the interaction between the two off them and especially the way you have written Snape. He seems to be obsessed with the Marauders and if cannon is anything to go by, it's not worth him finding out what is going on between them!

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Review #20, by CannonsKissing in Private: Part Two

22nd November 2014:
Hi,

I enjoyed reading this second chapter, I feel like I know a little more about Teddy.

Although it was really sad to see him getting him teased again by people, I am really pleased someone put him in his place and called him out for being defensive.

It seems as if he has just given up on people accepting him so it will be interesting to see how Runa features. Especially when she tells him 'you're not the only one who knows what it's like'

I felt kind of made at Victoire for not sticking up for Teddy but I guess it was because she was younger and trying to fit in with her own group of friends.

Looking forward to the next chapter. :)

Fin

Author's Response: Hi Fin!

Thank you so much for coming back to review the second chapter! It means a lot to me. :)

You nailed it when you said he has given up on people. That's what I'm going for--he is seen as a joke or a circus act but not as an actual person worth getting to know. I hope you enjoy how Runa plays into all of that in the coming chapters!

Victoire at thirteen was probably her entrance into popularity, and so that was her first priority at that time. At thirteen, her want to be liked by the popular kids was larger than her want to be teddy's friend. But actually it could be argued that she thought she WAS being a good friend by telling them to stop. But it came to a point where she needed to take a stand one way or another and she unfortunately chose to side with the group and leave her friend in the dust.

Thank you so much for reading! I really appreciate your time! :)


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Review #21, by CannonsIn The Black: Gossip and Guilt

21st November 2014:
I stopped reading half way through the second book when RL got in the way, but I finally have the time to start this series again and give it all the reviews it deserves. :D

There was something so familiar when I started reading the first two chapters again and it was a lovely feeling. I love Beth and how you write the marauders.

I don't really have anything intelligent to say in this review because it is so late but I will be back very soon.

Author's Response: Hey! It's so nice to hear from you again, especially since (forgive me!) I've stopped writing fan fiction in the past year to concentrate on writing original fiction that I'm working on submitting to literary agents. Long story short, it's really wonderful to know that you still think of, and are willing to re-read, this novel. I was thinking about Snape and Beth just yesterday myself!

Thank you so much for coming back for Sneth round two. ♥ It really means so much to me that you did! I hope you continue to enjoy the story, and I'd love to hear from you again!


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Review #22, by CannonsWake up, Rose.: Wake up.

21st November 2014:
Joey,

This was interesting. :) I seriously have no idea what to make off Scorpius at the moment. He is either being a total *insertwordofchoice*, or has been drugged apparently, but everyone else loves him. So I will just have to read on to find out about him if nothing else. :P

I really like the way you went about setting the whole chapter up, with giving the ages and personalities of everyone. That was done well and now it's out of the way, I know I dont like doing that when writing a new fic. I thought you spread everyone out well, and I always, like it when Al is in Slytherin.

I kind of have an issue with everyone on at Rose to find a guy, it's her own choice at the end of the day. So I was kind of annoyed at Al for slipping them that potion. Especially if he knew the full extent of how strong it was and what it was going to lead to.

I enjoyed your description with the paintings and the castle and things, very atmospheric.

I'm very interested as to what will happen next!

It's late and I'm on my ipad so if this review doesn't make sense you know why.

Fin

Author's Response: I'll tell you, it takes a while before you really get a clear idea of what to make of him. For someone so essential to the story, he's kind of *talked about* more than he actually appears. His character is rolled out very gradually.

I almost never introduce everyone in the first chapter, but I thought it pertinent, if only to see if any of her assessments change over the course of the story. And I always put Al in Slytherin. I absolutely claim him for my house. :P

I have a huge issue with everyone on Rose to find a guy as well. A lot of this story is kind of a TAKE THAT! aimed at people who are like that. Some of my characters are really, really morally defunct. I don't downplay the horrible, horrible thing he did by slipping her that. The moral of this story is basically 'you should respect people's choices and consent is a huge deal and here's why.' That said, I don't think he knew what it would lead to, at all. He's still horrible.

Thank you! I have an unnatural obsession with the portraits at Hogwarts!!

I'm glad that I've got you interested! Thank you so much for this review :D


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Review #23, by CannonsWorship You: Storm

21st November 2014:
Hi! I'm glad I caught you in the review tag because it gives me an excuse to check out your AP!

You've written this with no 'E', how is that even possible? I've already used over 10!

So I really liked how the reader has to re-read this to find out who the narrator is. I noticed a slash-warning and I'm pretty sure that the person they are talking about is Bellatrix.

So I am going to guess that it is Aurora Sinistra because of this line mainly. - 'It is my job to watch a nightís sky, studying shifts that many would not spot'.

I really like how you've written this like a puzzle, once you find out *potentially* who it is then other things start to make sense and ultimately the whole story makes sense.

I really liked how the narrator seems to know that her 'star' is not 'good' but still worship/loves her anyway.

The best part for me was when their paths split and Bellatrix went to Azkaban but the 'narrator' is in their own 'prison', that was really clever.

This is really impressive, firstly that you wrote this with so few words and got so much information across. Secondly you wrote this with no'E' and thirdly it is so intricate and detailed.

This was an enjoyable read!

:)

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Review #24, by CannonsKissing in Private: Part One

20th November 2014:
Hi,

Saw your blog on the forums so I thought I would give this a read.

The first bit was really powerful and so believable. It had never occurred to me before that Teddy would actually have to learn how to use his powers but now that I think about it, it is obvious that he would have to. To have people laughing at you is obviously something that would hurt someone so young and I find it sad that, that is the last time he tried to use his powers. (I'm reviewing as I read)

Love the image of the lake and one tiny thing upsetting the whole lake. Kind of like life in a way. :P

Man he is still getting picked on, I thought Tonks was always well like and well received at Hogwarts. I suppose though she had much more control over her powers.

I feel sorry for Teddy at the moment! Victoire seems nice, but purely platonic at the moment so it will be interesting to see how that plays out!

Fin

:)

Author's Response: Hi, Cannons! Thank you so much for coming over here to check out my story! I really appreciate your review. :)

It is a great compliment for me to hear that my work is believable and powerful. I have been thinking a lot lately about the effect it would have to take really powerful people like wizards and focus on their human qualities, so that's what I'm working on in this story. I'm so glad to hear you think the fact that Teddy was never taught how to control his powers was a good idea! I did some reading about Metamorphmagi, and it said that typically they use trial and error to figure out their powers, but I wanted to show a scene that would discourage Teddy from even trying.

Thank you so much! I'm glad it comes across that Victoire is purely platonic right now. I have never been a boy, but I am trying something new and taking a look into the psyche of a boy, using the relationships I have in real life.

Thank you so much for your review! You really didn't have to but I appreciate it so much :)


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Review #25, by CannonsSaving Severus Snape : Prologue

18th November 2014:
Hi Meg, finally here! I had already written out my review and then I lost it when I clicked 'submit review' because my internet was down.

Anyway, I was actually meaning to check this story out because I saw your banner request over on TDA and I have read quite a lot of your other time travel fic so I was quite excited.

The first thing I want to say is how do you write Dumbledore so well! It has become apparent to me that between this first chapter and your other time travel fic is that you seriously have a knack for writing him. It just feels like Dumbledore you know...?

I really like the reason for the time travel, obviously it is kind of important to have a good reason to go all the way back in time for something so saving Snape, seems like a legitimate reason. I like how Hermione questions is though and thinks about it. Her not telling Ron and Harry was believable as well.

It was so good how she actually received the time turner, that was such a Dumbledore thing to do. Already set to the right time period and everything.

I liked how you started the story straight after the war, it gave it some atmosphere. And how does Hermione even have the strength to keep going after everything that has happened to her recently? Which is why I was so pleased when I read that she didn't cope as well as normal when she arrives.

Also I found it so funny that Dumbelore has absolutely no issue with people traveling back through time on his request. Just that it makes sense now. :P

If you pull this fic off it is going to be amazing!

Good luck. :D

Fin

Author's Response: Hey Fin! :D

No worries! The internet can be quite temperamental sometimes. ;)

Aww that's so nice of you! I'm incredibly flatter that you were meaning to check this out anyhow! Thanks! :D

Wow, thank you! He really isn't easy to write, and I do end up re-writing his dialogue dozens of times, so that is really, really awesome to hear. I always hate when I read him and he just seems SO off, so I always hope that I can at least come close to how he actually sounds. I truly appreciate that, so again, thank you!

I wanted to do a story where she goes back, not intending on changing anyone's future. I mean, she does intend on showing Snape that he does have a life worth fighting for; a life worth living. But she's not going to tell anyone anything. She will be using her alias this entire story, which I thought would be quite fun. :D I really can't see her not thinking through something this big. And I don't think she would want to bring Harry and Ron with her. Not after everything they had all just been through. I'm really glad that all came across well. ♥

Couldn't you see Dumbledore doing something so enigmatic? Basically, "Here's this box. It has a Time-Turner. Use it well," and sends her on her merry way haha.

Oh I'm so happy you liked that. I was going for a big of a tense, almost foreboding type atmosphere. I don't know how she did it. I don't even know how she was still awake after all that. But with her mind spinning the way it was, even if she was exhausted, it would be enough to keep her awake. Hearing where she ended up, definitely pushed her to her breaking point.

Hahaha I know! He was just like, "Oh. Here's a girl with a Time-Turner, handing me an envelope with my initials. I guess I sent her here."

I'm certainly hoping that I do! :) I have the whole thing outlined and mapped out and am incredibly excited to get it all written out. I'm really happy with how this story will progress and I hope everyone else likes it, too! ♥

Thank you so much! Thanks for doing the swap and for this wonderful review!!

xoxo Meg ♥


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