Reading Reviews From Member: silverashes
71 Reviews Found

Review #1, by silverashesTrapped: Trapped

21st July 2014:
Hello! So I browsing through the recently added stories, and I came across yours. It sounded a little dark and mysterious, so I thought I'd stop in for a quick read. I like the almost mournful twist you have on Rose. I've seen her portrayed as nasty, stubborn, and bubbly; but I've never seen her so trapped. I think you did a wonderful job! I liked the new Rose, even though it made me sad to see her like that. She elicits a new kind of feeling from the reader!

Lovely, lovely job!

xx Rachel

Author's Response: Thank you so much Rachel! It makes me very happy to hear that you liked the twist on her, your review means a lot, thanks! :)

- Leo

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Review #2, by silverashesGravel on the Ground: From the Ashes: Chapter 7

18th July 2014:
Ah, again I love Ginny. She's taking Sadie under her wing. I liked the idea about Ginny's hiding place in the tree trunk. It was so quaint, and something I think she would definitely need in a house of all boys! Sadie's starting to blossom. Slowly but surely!

Oh! Fred saw what Sadie was seeing?! OMG I need to find out why. EEK! I can't wait to keep reading!

xx Rachel

Author's Response: Ah, thank you so much for this review! I always love it when you pop up. And I'm really glad you enjoyed the chapter! It was fun to give Ginny something that was just hers, not inherited from an older brother. And to have her share it with Sadie felt really natural.

Glad you think Sadie is starting to blossom. She has a long way to go, but this family is certainly helping her.

And yes, Fred saw Sadie's memory. As for how, well...we'll get there.

Thanks again for reading!

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Review #3, by silverashesBackground Noise: The Curse of Carkett Close

18th July 2014:
Hullo, I'm in love with your story and all of it's characters. That was rather blunt, but I thought I'd put it all out there into the open. Joanna and Nora are both absolutely and positively entertaining. I like how different this story is. It has such a unique charm to it! My favorite quote was definitely this conversational gem:

-You mean that Anglo-Saxon burial mound?

-Yes, that was my inspiration for the cake. Here.

I actually laughed out loud. Not even figuratively, but quite literally. Please update soon!

xx Rachel

Author's Response: Hello Rachel!

Gah, THANK YOU. I loved the bluntness of your opening statement! And I'm well flattered that you're so entertained by Jo and Nora. And I'm pleased I managed to induce real, literal laughter from you!

Many thanks for reading and taking the time to leave this smashing review! ♥


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Review #4, by silverashesGravel on the Ground: From the Ashes: Chapter 6

17th July 2014:
Hello, hello! I'm back from the dead! I can't believe I missed this much of the story, good God! I absolutely adore how kind Fred, George, and Ginny were to Sadie in this chapter. The whole scene with the jacket nearly broke my heart (in a good way)! Though my heart did shatter when she had to watch her entire family die right in front of her eyes. What an awful thing to make such a young child -- or anyone -- experience. Poor Sadie!

Once again, you did a lovely job! I love reading this story, so I'm off to the next chapter!

xx Rachel

Author's Response: Hello! I know that feeling! I've been "dead" for most of the year until now, so no need to apologize! I'm just so excited that you've started reading again.

Thank you for your kind words! I'm so happy you liked Fred and George and Ginny in this chapter, and the way they treated Sadie. And sorry about shattering your heart. It was hard to do, but it was necessary for the story.

Thanks again! Can't wait to see what you think of the next chapter.

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Review #5, by silverashesFluorescent Adolescent : it's cold outside

13th June 2014:
Hi, hi! So basically I'm utterly enthralled with this story. I absolutely adore it. I sat down an hour and a half ago to start reading, and I haven't moved since. I think my legs are completely numb right now, but it's so worth it. I ADORE Effy. And James. And Aspen. And Al. And Mikey. And Oscar. I love everyone, honestly. I love Effy's sass and her quick wit. Her and James need to get their ducks in a row and figure out what they're going to do with their relationship because I love them together. Speaking of James, I hope he's okay. I'm really excited to see what happens next! (I'm secretly hoping Effy will go to France with the Potters!) Please, please update soon! This story is absolutely lovely!


Author's Response: ahh this MADE MY DAY i'm SO glad you like it! it's genuinely been so fun to write and i'm just so happy that you seem to like it so much ahahah- i don't really know what to say! luuusms!! this review made my day, i'm so glad you like the crew with all their flaws and their selfish habits and obnoxious ways- and i'm especially happy you like effy & james! thanks again for reviewing rachel xxx

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Review #6, by silverashesComposure: ten.

2nd February 2014:
You're back! I've been looking forward to this for so long! It's like a belated Christmas present, and I'm ecstatic! I loved, loved, loved this chapter to no end. I ship Evie and Freddie so hard >_< I know they're not in a good place right now, but I love them! I think it's absolutely hilarious that she ended up spending the rest of the night with Freddie's ex. I was in tears I was laughing so hard. I also love Eoin. His character is so intoxicating. I can't wait to see where you take us next! Please update soon!

xx Rachel

PS Thank you for the shout-out it made my day :D

Author's Response: No, YOU'RE BACK! -squishes-
Your dedication to reviewing and your happiness and niceness and general gushy words and praise makes my head swell and makes me want to fold you up and put you in a box so I can pull you out whenever I feel sad, which is exactly why I always go back and read the reviews you leave if I need a boost! Honestly, your reviews make my day over and over again and I do love you for it. THANK YOU SO MUCH

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Review #7, by silverashesComposure: nine.

17th November 2013:
YAY! *twirls around* I was so excited when I saw that you updated! It's been such a hectic fall, and I've been away from this site for so long. It was so exciting to see a new chapter! Squee! Ugh have I mentioned before how much I love Freddie? I love him so much it hurts my heart! The only thing I love more than Freddie is the prospect of him and Eva becoming a couple. Ah

Author's Response: YOU ARE ADORABLE! thank you so so so much. you always make my day, it's the best thing ever you lovely creature you!

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Review #8, by silverashesHourglass: morning

2nd November 2013:
Hi there!

I'm so sorry that it took me over a month to get over here *blushes*. I'm wicked embarrassed! It shouldn't have taken me so long, but the month of October put me into academic over drive (with college applications and the like).

I think you've done a lovely job with the first chapter! I totally understand your feelings on first chapters! They're really hard to write because you want them to be perfect. You've done just that! I love the whole chapter! The very beginning with the parchment paper had me laughing. The fact that the parchment expressed pros and cons was hilarious!

Scorpius' character is very interesting! I've never read a story where he is snobby and self-centered like his father was in the books! I like the change. It sets him apart from all the other Scorpius' wandering around this site. His character is very different from Al's, and I like their contrast! I loved the part with the note! It was so realistic! Rose and Scorpius were giving him such a hard time. My favorite was the ending line! I loved, loved, loved the ending line! Well I guess it was the second to last line!

- He let out a dry laugh. “No worries, D.L.Z. I don’t have time to fall in love.”

Overall I think you have a wonderful start! This chapter was absolutely lovely! Keep up the good work!

xx Rachel

Author's Response: No need to be sorry! I'm writing this response two months later than I should've. So really, I should be apologizing.

AND also saying thank you thank you thank you.

I love Al and Scorpius's relationship, so I'm glad that you feel the same. They are very opposite, but they're also both trying to separate themselves from their fathers' legacies--both for different reasons--so they have more in common than initially expected. I'm going to explore their relationship more in future chapters, so this was just a taste of what is to come!

Gah, I'm just so glad you liked it. Thank you!

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Review #9, by silverashesEpitaph of a Good Man: Clumsy Meeting

2nd November 2013:

*blushes* I'm so embarrassed at how long it took me to get your review finished! I'm awfully sorry. October put me into over drive, and I had a hard time escaping my school work. I wasn't ignoring you; I promise! Apologies aside let's get down to the real reason I'm here: your story!

So I'll start from the beginning. I was immediately intrigued by the first couple paragraphs, especially the first. I think you characterized the narrator very well. She's was a Sally Sue...I think I totally messed that name up. OH gosh, sorry. A Mary Sue! She wasn't a Mary Sue! I loved the fact that you made her love with Remus gradual. She didn't fall head over heals immediately after they met the first time.

I also love the way you've characterized the Order in general. They come across as a clique (for lack of a better word), and honestly I think that's the most accurate description of their group that I've ever read. I can only imagine how difficult it must be to become included into that group! I would be terrified. All of the characters in the chapter have been portrayed perfectly! They seem so real that sometimes I think they might jump out of my computer screen!

I think you've done a lovely job! The story holds a lot of interest! Keep up the good work!

xx Rachel

Author's Response: Hi Rachel!!

I'm terribly behind on my review queue too - so I tend to give people a huge amount of liberty when it comes to timing of reviews. :D

It's so great that Tonks doesn't come across as a Mary Sue! I tried to make her well rounded, imperfect, and quite genuine. I put her through a slow burn with Remus just because it didn't make sense for them to have a year of happy bliss by the time HBP rolled around but I wanted them to have a year of stuff (flirting, love, etc.) - just not bliss.

It means a lot to me that you liked how the Order came across here. I recently edited this chapter a lot - and the Order characterization was one of the key items I changed.

Thank you so much for such a detailed and helpful review!! I greatly appreciate all your feedback. :D


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Review #10, by silverashesGravel on the Ground: From the Ashes: Chapter 5

29th September 2013:
Hello, lovely!

I just have to say that I fall in love with Sadie more and more every chapter. She has this sort of innocence, but at the same time she has been jaded by her traumatic childhood. She's this mix of qualities that makes her an interesting character to read! I feel so bad that she's so nervous about meeting new people. It must be quite a change to go from being alone to living in a room with a bunch of other girls. Awe, I love all of the boys. They're so sweet to Sadie, and their banter makes me laugh!

I loved the section with Bill. His analyzation of Sadie's condition was interesting! Her whole story just seems to fit so gracefully into the fourth book. It all flows so smoothly! Ohmigosh Bill is so sweet. My heart ached when Sadie began to cry. She has so much hurt built up inside of her. She needs someone like Bill to take the spot of her absent older brother.

I hope she and Harry have a conversation soon. I can see them getting along quite swell-ly. Another brilliant chapter! I can't wait to read the next one!

xx Rachel

Author's Response: Hi yourself! Sorry I'm slow responding! Real life has been brutal again.

And I can't tell you how much you just made my day with your first sentence there. You are really falling in love with Sadie? THAT IS SO COOL! I put this up, pretty sure everyone would end up hating Sadie and flaming me for having a Mary-Sue, and I have been so astonished at the responses I've received instead.

That innocence is something I stuck in Sadie on purpose. Yes, she's had a horrible, horrible life, but at the same time, she's also been rather sheltered. And, I really wanted a character that wasn't the sarcastic, loud, popular girl that everyone loves to hang out with. So, I'm so happy you are enjoying how I'm writing her.

And yes, don't we love our Weasley boys (and Harry.) They are just the best!

Oh, thank you! I was nervous about using Bill, as he's kind of not as popular and I didn't want it to come across as creepy or anything, but I really wanted to give Sadie a big-brother type character to bond with.

And yes, Sadie has a lot of hurt she's holding inside, and she's not always very good at letting it out. She's gonna need help with that...

Promise some Harry and Sadie friendship building soon. :D

Thanks again for reading. Right now I'm thinking the next chapter will go up in the first of December, but I'm making Sadie fic my nano project, so there might be more sooner.

Thanks again!

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Review #11, by silverashesPicking Up the Pieces: Flashback

29th September 2013:

I liked the beginning of this chapter a lot. We got to see a whole new side of the story. Reoccurring attacks, Gawain becoming increasingly suspicious. Harry and Ron's characters added a nice touch. You did a good job characterizing them. I felt like they had been pulled out of the novels! I feel really sorry for the man who died. His mangled body shows how horrible his death must have been! Awe, the conversation between Draco and Harry was so cute. I loved Harry's ability to forgive and forget!

OMG. When Draco got home I nearly fell out of my chair. My heart jumped into my throat. I would bet money that Gawain had a hand in the attack. Poor Anaxandra, as if she's hasn't been through enough. She can't seem to catch a break!

The next part was fabulous. All of those pictures matched what had happened to her. She must have been so terrified when the lights began to flicker. My hands were shaking during that entire scene! Ohmigosh. What an intense chapter! Absolutely brilliant!

xx Rachel

Author's Response: I'm glad that you enjoyed this! I was really wary of the action scene, and I'm happy to see that it had you on edge!

I'm also very happy that you thought I got Harry and Ron down. I'm having a really hard time characterizing them in that chapter, and in chapters to come. So to see that you liked that was awesome.

Thank you for the feedback! :)

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Review #12, by silverashesCareful What You Wish For: The Dementor on the Train

28th September 2013:
Hi, hi!

*hides behind hands* I'm wicked sorry for the late review. Real life has been dragging me down lately. I've been trying to get to this review for a week and a half now! I do apologize!

Anyways, I loved this chapter. The whole car ride scene at the beginning has such a perfect balance. It was light hearted with all of the characters and their hilarious banter, but at the same time you snuck in a little bit of darkness. The snippet about Sirius Black added depth to the story, and I really liked it!

I love Penny and Angus! They're so funny! I would love to have the two of them as friends! I laughed so hard when Angus told Dani that she was like Oliver. They're perfect for eachother. I know this is a little soon (seeing as it is only the second chapter) , but I do hope they end up together! MEEP! She's thinks he's good looking! YAY! We're making progress. Go Dani!

I think you did a brilliant job entwining your own material with the information from the book! It flowed beautifully! I felt like Dani, Kat, and everyone else were meant to be in the books. It fit in so nicely!

My absolute favorite line from this chapter was this:

-"Admittedly, that boyfriend happened to be Percy Weasley, Hogwarts’ resident prat, but beggers couldn’t be choosers."

I laughed so hard that my eyes watered a little bit. Wonderful chapter!

xx Rachel

Author's Response: Hello!

Seriously, don't worry about how long it takes, because I know exactly what you mean!

I'm really glad you liked this chapter! And I definitely like adding references into this story about canon events, such as the escape of Sirius Black.

I'm so happy you like Penny and Angus - I'd love to have them as friends, as well. And how could you not think Oliver is good looking? You'd have to be half blind!

Thank you for the lovely review!


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Review #13, by silverashesPicking Up the Pieces: Happenstance

28th September 2013:
Hello! *hides behind desk*

I'm so, so sorry for my lack of punctuality on this review. It's been about two weeks, and for that I'm severely sorry! I've been meaning to leave this review for a really long time!

I LOVED this chapter! I like it when Anaxandra and Draco take little field trips outside of her house. They're always so entertaining! Anaxandra's run-in with Arlok was wicked interesting. It was a nice way to wade into her past. We were so close, SO close to finding out more about her. Then Draco had to ruin it all. *heavy sigh* Come on Draco!

I hope we find out who killed her family! Arlok obviously knows who it was, but he seems adamant on on not telling Anaxandra. Hmm...a little suspicious. Maybe Arlok had a hand in the catastrophe? I guess we shall find out in up coming chapters. I'll be holding my breath until we get there!

You're doing such a good job keeping the interest up in this story! Every chapter reveals a little bit more, or ALMOST reveals something which makes me excited to keep reading. The characters are developing so nicely. I hope we can have a little more Draco/Anaxandra nice time soon!

Brilliant like always!

xx Rachel

Author's Response: No worries at all! :)

I'm glad that you liked this chapter! And I'm also very happy that this entertains you, as that has been my worry with this story. I'm trying to keep the pace consistent and also add in a little more each chapter so that the reader isn't completely lost, and I'm glad you think I'm doing a good job of that!

You're getting very close to Ana/Draco nice time! Very close!!!

Thank you so much for your feedback!

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Review #14, by silverashesEngaged?!: Engaged?!

14th September 2013:
Hello there!

I had some time on my hands, so I thought I'd tackle your story! Sorry my page hasn't been updated in a while. My reviews were piling up, but the second week of school is always so crazy! Enough about crazy reality! Your story is very interesting! It was a whirlwind of very interesting, crazy things, but I thought it as hilarious! It was so unique! I've never read anything like it before!

I thought it was cool that the reader kind of has to use their head to read the story -- well I mean in the sense that they have to concentrate and think about what's going on. I understood the whole story, and I thought it was wicked funny. I liked all the bizarre things that happened throughout the course of the story-line. I think the Gryffindor party in the Common Room, and then the entire house getting locked out was my favorite. The whole thing was so comical. Overall very nicely done!

xx Rachel

Author's Response: Hello again Rachel! :)

Thanks for reviewing this :) Don't worry about crazy reality! It strikes all of us all the time. No need to apologize!

I'm glad you find it new and interesting. I think that's a huge compliment you can give a writer :)

I know it could be a little... well, it demands concentration in some ways. I know it's busy, and I'm glad you still liked it :)
Aww :) Thanks! I'm glad you found it funny. I was striving for that.

Thank you so much :)

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Review #15, by silverashesEssay Forgotten: The Library

14th September 2013:
Hello there!

I want to apologize for my untimely-ness of this review! I had my second week of school and it was beyond crazy. I miss my summer freedom, haha. Anyways! Back to your story! I think your idea is very unique. I have to say that I have never read a Ginny/Draco story before! This is new ground for me.

You had the characters personalities pinned nicely! I feel like the story line might fit better with a short story, so you can develop their relationship. I think (because they hate each other so much) that it would be more realistic if they had a little more time to find those feelings for each other. Maybe they get stuck in a detention together or locked in the Room of Requirement! I think you could make this into a really interesting short story!

I think your writing style and plot are both very interesting. Your writing flows very smoothly, there's never any hiccups. You give enough detail for the reader to picture the characters and their surroundings! The plot is very unique, so I think that readers will find the story very interesting!

One minor spelling error that I noticed:
-It took all of her self-control not to curs him. “Please, just go."
-curs should be curse

Overall I think you have a really good start!

xx Rachel

Author's Response: Oh, don't worry about it:) Sorry about the timing of my response. I hope I'm doing the ship justice, as it's your fist one to read.

Thank you! I really like to try and make their personalities as accurate as possible, so that's good:)That's a good idea! I like the idea of them being together in detention.

Aww, thanks! I'm so happy you like it! *happy dance*

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Review #16, by silverashesPicking Up the Pieces: Confession

14th September 2013:
Hello, hello!

Sorry it's taken me so long to get to this review! I had my second week of school, and it was crazzyy! I finally have time to sit down and relax. thankfully! Enough about my life, your story! I loved the beginning scene. Anaxadra doesn't understand that Draco actually cares about her well-being. He really does. Even if he has a hard time showing it.

Oh no. The day of her family's death. Ohmigosh. I can't even imagine the guilt she has pent up inside of her. I could feel the pain radiating off of her character. It made me so sad. I can't even imagine what she's going through. Draco was so kind. I wish Anaxandra had let him say why he was sleeping on her couch. I really wanted to know, but Anaxandra saw the compassion in Draco's eyes -- finally!

I hope at some point soon he will tell her about when he used to be a Death Eater. For some reason I feel like she will be okay with it. I think she might accept it because his past relates so closely with hers. OOhh! I wonder what was on the letter he sent! Overall wonderful chapter!

xx Rachel

Author's Response: Hi! It's okay, there are priorities :P

Yeah, they do some bonding in this chapter that neither of them really wanted, but it happened. It won't be too soon that she finds out... In the next chapter I'm writing for this, so Chapter 13, is when I'm planning on doing it, but we'll see where my imagination takes me. The joys of writing lol.

Thank you for taking the time out of your busy schedule to read and review!

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Review #17, by silverashesGravel on the Ground: From the Ashes: Chapter 4

10th September 2013:
Hello, hello!

Awe. Mrs. Weasley is so precious. She's honestly one of the nicest women in the entire world. If I were in Sadie's place there would be no place I'd rather be (which I'm sure Sadie will learn!). I loved the first scene where Sadie is being dropped off at the Weasley's. It was just so believable: the stampede of kids, the overwhelming hug from Mrs. Weasley, meeting Harry for the first time, and everything else that happened! I really like getting glimpses into Sadie's past! The section where she gets brief memories of Harry, James, and Lily gave me a mixture of emotions. I was really say - for obvious reasons - but at the same time I was excited to learn more!

The whole breakfast scene might have been might favorite scene in the story so far! I LOVED it. It was just so fitting. Sadie seemed so excited to be around all of these new people. I liked the banter between the Weasley's/Harry towards each other and their kindness towards Sadie. Harry's intuition is amazing. I'm not sure if I would have caught on to that if I were him! She has such a sad aura! My heart broke when she was sitting by herself in the Burrow, divulging into the memories she's packed away into the back of her mind. I do hope that she can find happiness (and her voice!!). I'm really, really excited to see where you take the story! I can't wait to find out what happens next! Another brilliant chapter!!

xx Rachel

Author's Response: Hi Rachel! Thanks for coming back! I was so excited to see this review!

I love Mrs. Weasley. And while I sometimes wonder if I'm sticking her in a rut, being all motherly all the time, I then tell myself that's who she is! And that's why I lover her! So yes, I agree, Sadie couldn't be in a better place right now.

I'm glad you liked Sadie meeting everyone! Meet and greets are HARD to write, so it's nice to know I pulled it off, and everyone seemed mostly in character. And yes, the little glimpses into Sadie's past are coming, aren't they. I threw in the mention of the Potters because I wanted to show that she wasn't totally unaware that she had a cousin, even if Harry was.

Yeah! Glad you liked it! It was very fun to write. And it is fun to see Sadie starting to interact with everyone. Harry's intuition might have been a bit grown up for him, but he's always struck me as a sort of old soul, so I let it stay.

I hope that sad aura isn't off-putting for her as a character. I don't want her to be pathetic, or seem depressed or anything. But, she isn't a bubbly little thing either. And I have to say it makes me feel so good to know that her story is evoking feelings in you! Thanks so much!

This story is about her trying to find that happiness. I'm so very excited to have you along for the ride! Thanks for reading and always giving such wonderful reviews. I always look forward to them when I post a new chapter.


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Review #18, by silverashesIn Sickness And In Health: Healing in Hell?

8th September 2013:
Hello again!

I really like the suspense in the beginning. Well maybe mystery is a better word for it! Hermione and Draco are alone in this strange place that neither of them know. I think that adds a lot of interest to the story. Then you added to the interest by having them both inflicted with a curse. Ohmigosh. I didn't see that coming! I'm really curious to find out what the curse was! I'm also super curious to find out what happened to Harry and Ron during the war! MEEP! I hope it's not anything too horrible! I also hope that Voldemort is dead, but I guess we'll find out in due time!

I'm really excited to see how Hermione and Draco act while they have to live in this really small, confined place for a month. Hopefully they can get over their differences and get along! I'm really happy that they can keep in contact with their friends! That would have been hard if they couldn't!

One minor spelling mistake that I saw!
-“In a coma-lie state, yes” just like instead of lie!

Overall, really, really good chapter! Nice job!

xx Rachel

Author's Response: Hello Rachel! Thank you for reviewing again!

Thank you! This story is built on this curse and the mystery behind it, and I am glad that it is resonating through the chapters! The curse will unfold itself in time, there's a lot to come first :P What happens to Harry and Ron and Voldemort is also coming up, but as Draco and Hermione are not supposed to know anything of the outside world, when they do find out there may be consequences...:P

I hope so too! Otherwise I am going to have to cut the story short because they have committed a murder-suicide! Don't worry, that's not going to happen, but they have their hiccups along the way!

Friendship is big in this story, so I wouldn't not let them keep in touch, it's so important!

Oh yes, I will fix that up! I have a beta who are going through these chapters and I'm sure she will pick that up also!

Thank you very much! I'm glad you enjoyed it :)


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Review #19, by silverashesPicking Up the Pieces: Freedom

8th September 2013:
Hi, hi!

I'm going to start off by, again, declaring my weariness for Gawain. He gives me bad vibes. I'm not sure if that's how you're trying to portray him; but, if you are, you're doing so fabulously! I'm really getting some odd vibes from this guys. I feel like he's responsible for Anaxandra's family's death, and now he's trying to preoccupy everyone by keeping Draco on the job! Draco is, and continues to be, a very steady character. His character stays put. He's not all over the place. He makes choices and decisions that I would expect out of him, so you're doing a wonderful job! I really love the relationship between Anaxandra and Draco! Their outing was really fun! I wish we got to hear the question for a question game, but obviously Draco saw something! I hope we find out what it is!!

Your plotline is running very smoothly! You're staying on track, and I really like that you're slowly allowing the reader to learn more and more about the characters and Anaxandra's past! I think the detail is perfect! I don't think I can find anywhere in the story that needs more or less detail! I also really loved the last bit. I don't know if it was a dream or a memory, but I loved it! Nice work!!

xx Rachel

Author's Response: Thank you for the review!

That is definitely the way I'm trying to portray him, and I'm glad that he is giving off that kind of vibe. It'll be a while, while meaning in a chapter I have yet to fully write, but you will find out about him. Gawain is probably my most interesting character, and one of the harder to write for.

I'm glad Draco is staying in character. I'm trying really hard not to make him "Hogwarts Draco", but I don't want him to have a complete change from what we all know. What he saw is also in an upcoming chapter that I have yet to write lol.

I'm glad my plot is running smoothly. And what kind of mystery story would this be if I just threw in all the history of everything right then and there? Lol.

Again, thank you so much for the lovely review!

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Review #20, by silverashesBreakoff Altitude: Where Fabian has a hanger with his sibs

5th September 2013:
Hello again!

I'm sorry it took me so long to get over here! School just started up this week, and my life has been beyond hectic. I finally have a few minutes to myself *sighs*. Anyways! I really, really like what you have so far! To start off with the plot, my favorite part is that you have this witty, light-hearted, love fantasy thing entwined with the upcoming darkness. It just seems so realistic to me, but it also shows that even in dark times there can be certain kinds of light! Ahaha, sorry if that was too cheesy!

Now to the characters, the lovely characters. Well I think Fabian is adorable. His lusting after her for all of these years makes my heart melt. I really like his character. He's sweet and a little bit quiet, but he's perfect boyfriend material (let's send some hints to Amelia!!) We get to meet Molly! Yay! I loved the whole sibling hang-out sesh that happened towards the end. I love how Gideon and Molly were both so happy for him. They were both just as invested in setting Fabian and Amelia up as Fabian was himself! So cute! The flashback flowed gracefully with the rest of the chapter! I think it fit in nicely and added a bit of information. We got to see Fabian's side of the story from the fateful day of!

Overall another wonderful chapter! Nice work!

xx Rachel

Author's Response: Yay!! Thank you! Your reviews make me so happy :)

I know Amelia really needs to get her head on correctly Fabian is just too good to lose.


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Review #21, by silverashesDouble Trouble : Prologue-October 31st

3rd September 2013:
Hello there!

There was one minor thing that I noticed when I was reading. In the first paragraph you had a spelling mistake. It said "make" instead of "may". Other than that your grammar was perfect!

As for the flow, I think you did a nice job! It's very smooth. Nothing jumped out at me as out of place. I'm slightly confused as to how Sirius will be her father because he goes to Azkaban. Though I have full confidence that you will explain that later, seeing as this is only the prologue! I like the idea of the story. I think it cab be believable if you come up with a good story behind it, and as far as I can tell, you have! I think the details in the story are fabulous. I really felt like I was watching as movie as I read. I could picture each scene and feel the emotions of the characters through your words.

Overall I think you have a really great beginning to a story! I can't wait to see where you take this!

xx Rachel

Author's Response: I knew there had to be one grammar mistake that would get past me and my beta I'll go fix that when I get the chance.

Ahh but who says Sirius is going to Azkaban? I couldn't do that to my favorite character :D It's actually explained more in the 2nd chapter.

I'm so happy that you liked the story and that you actually felt that you were watching a movie that made me smile so big that I actually think I look slightly crazy as my boyfriend is giving me a weird look.

Thanks so much for the review:D

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Review #22, by silverashesGravel on the Ground: From the Ashes: Chapter 3

3rd September 2013:

I'm so excited that you keep inviting me back! I was so excited to read this chapter that I spilt water all over my desk...oopsies. My clumsiness aside, I LOVED this chapter. Once again you did a phenomenal job with the characters. Honestly, I feel like I'm reading the original books when I read your story. The characters' personalities are so perfect that...I just...I can't even. Albus Dumbledore was flawless. That's all I have to say on the matter. I really like how you've depicted the friendship between Albus and Minerva. They always seem like such powerful characters -- which they are -- but this friendship makes them seem more human to the reader. That's a nice touch!

Again I feel the need to ramble about the emotions you evoke with your word choice and brilliant writing style. My heart hurt when Minerva was recalling the day she had to tell Jenny about James and Lily. I can feel how badly that must have hurt both women -- Minerva now more than ever. I felt her regret, sorrow, and anger over Sadie's condition and the fact that there might have been a way to save her. I feel like that strikes a familiar chord with all readers because everyone has felt that pang of regret. The regret that they could have stopped or fixed a situation but took a different course of actions instead. You make the story very believable and give the readers the ability to connect to your story on a personal and emotional level!

Ah! I'm excited to know what her glasses mean! I do hope we find out soon! I'm interested! Awe Sadie made sad when she was standing in front of the mirror, in complete awe over the fact that she had new clothes just for her. More hints at her past. Ooh! I really can't wait to learn more! Sadie's character has such depth. I love learning about her! I actually did end up crying in this chapter. I really did. When Dumbledore was giving her encouragement I cried. Too much feels for one chapter ohmigosh. But I loved it! Every second of it! Pure brilliance!


xx Rachel

Author's Response: I'm so excited that you're so excited to keep coming back! (Oooh, sorry about the water - hands over a towel.) And 100 out of 10, wow! Thank you so much!

Your review has just left me grinning so much I'm not sure how to answer. To think you liked my characters and writing enough to compare it to the books is just... Well, I'm in aw. I struggled so much with writing Dumbledore and McGonagall in this chapter. I love them, but they can be difficult to get them in character. I wanted them to be emotionally invested in Sadie, but not out of character. I'm so very glad you think it worked.

Okay, now I'm blushing again. For real. My stories are character and emotionally driven, at least in my head, but I'm not always sure that's how they come across to readers. When readers tell me they have connected emotionally with the story and the characters I feel so grateful, because that's what drives my writing. So, thank you very much!

Ah, only you and Sian have picked up on the glasses hint. Can't tell you, but just don't forget them. LOL.

My beta and dear friend made a comment in the beginnings of this story that Sadie has a bit of a sadness about her - and it's true. And I didn't even realize her name has the word "sad" in it, until so much later. But it does fit. She won't stay sad, not always, but she does have a bit of that "too old for her age" aura about her. AT least I HOPE she does. Comments like yours make me hope it's coming across in the story.

You cried? WOW. I should be horrified I made you cry, and yet I'm so grinning like an idiot.

Thank you so very much! Next chapter should be up by Sunday.

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Review #23, by silverashesThe Fall of the Town : A Stranger In the Dawn

2nd September 2013:
Hello again!

Yay! I'm glad to be called back for chapter two! I love reading this story, it's so unique. The writing style throughout your story is truly lovely to read. The beginning section about the Peverell's lost children was heart wrenching, and I could feel their pain in my own heart. You string words together and they fit like puzzle pieces. It's like they are meant to be there!

I loved the portrayal of Marigold and Stephan's first meeting. Well...I guess they haven't actually met yet, but I like how you described how they first saw each other. The whole scene was very picturesque! Their relationship is fun to watch! I think you do a really good job of slipping between people. It's very smooth the way the scenes change, and we get different views on different people!

I feel sorry for Trip, especially when Marigold snaps at him. She only further induced his own worries about being a Muggle born wizard! I do hope she apologizes and nothing bad happens to him. I feel sorry for the way he was treated! Please keep him safe! Overall, brilliant chapter!

xx Rachel

Author's Response: Hello! :)

I'm so honoured you like the story, and think that it's unique! I love the formal language and writing style that this piece seemed to inspire in me, and I'm pleased you enjoyed it as well. Thank you for these lovely comments! :)

I'm glad you also enjoyed Marigold and Stephane's interactions, and their first meeting. I was a little worried about having too many characters and small stories in the context of the larger story, but I'm pleased it's working out well and smoothly. I felt sorry for Trip as well, and yes, it really wasn't Marigold's finest moment, even if she did feel sorry after.

Thank you so much for leaving this wonderful review, my dear! :D Getting this thoughtful feedback on the story means a lot to me.

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Review #24, by silverashesIn Sickness And In Health: The Battle

2nd September 2013:
Hello again!

This is a captivating plot line! You've redone the battle scene, and I like it. It's an interesting take on the Battle of Hogwarts. I like how you portrayed Harry, Ron, and Hermione with the Order of Phoenix. This way they are all together when they begin to fight. The chapter does move a little quickly, well only the first section and the beginning of the second. Her confrontation with Draco comes a little quickly. I think she should have a little more time to absorb her surroundings and maybe meet with people she knows before talking to Draco; however, the rest of the chapter moves along smoothly.

As for you characterization I think you did a good job. Hermione is a little more outgoing and courageous than she is in the books, but I don't think that's a problem. Though I do feel her dialogue with Draco seems a little too out of character. She's never been one to stoop down to Draco's level (except for that one time in third year). Writing a character is up to you though! You have to characterize them how you want to characterize them. I think Hermione's more brave personality is unique and something the site doesn't see too often. Draco is basically the same as in the books, but I like the way he is stuck in between the two sides. He can't decide between his family/friends and what he knows is right. I think that little inner turmoil adds a lot of depth to his character.

Overall I think you have a really good start to a story! Nice job!

xx Rachel

Author's Response: Hello! Thank you for the review! Sorry I have taken so long to respond, i have been at home and been a bit neglectful.

I'm glad you find the plotline interesting, it was a bit hard to begin like that but it needed a start, even if it was a slow and off topic. I was worried that it does move a bit quickly. I am thinking of expanding on this chapter and making it longer and more in depth, but it is still a prologue.. so i don't know. I will just have a play.

I'm really relieved to hear you think Hermione is in character, at least for the most part! I think the same thing about the confrontation with Draco, that is a section that is going to be rewritten at a point. I'm glad you also think that Draco is in character. I find him very hard to portray without being the cliche version 'life is so hard to me, somebody love me' type. There's a lot more to him than that and i hopefully will write it well :)

Thank you again for such a great review! I'm glad you enjoyed this chapter :)

Grace :)

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Review #25, by silverashesThe Second Life I Lead: School Mates and Cows' Eyes

30th August 2013:
Hello again!

Another good chapter! You characterized Hermione even further, and I'm continually falling in love with her character over, and over again! And we got to meet Draco this chapter, yay! I share Draco's feelings on Pansy! I wish she had stayed home back in England. She's prissy and always seems to have her panties in a twist; but, alas, she will definitely add some drama. I liked Draco's character. He and Hermione seemed to get along well, which I wasn't expecting. I thought they would have been a little more hostile. Change is good though. I'm glad they could both get over their severe differences and move forward from the past.

I thought the end scene was hilarious. The dissecting an eye made me cringe (that kind of stuff makes me wriggle), I thought the overall scene was fluffy, funny, and kept me thoroughly entertained! There were a few things I noticed throughout the chapter -- nothing big! There were a few places where there were words that needed to be capitalized. Here's one spot!

I also think that all of the caps and exclamation points can be a little distracting. It's a little hard on the eyes. I think you can get your point of how angry she is across with just normal lettering! If you describe how she reacts (like when you use the word scream) or maybe say that her face became flushed, you can get the same point across! Also there were a few slight grammatical errors, but they weren't too bad! In the quote above "got" should be "gotten". There were a few other places, but overall nice work! Honestly there was nothing that stuck out like a sore thumb, just some minor things!

The overall plot, story-line, and characterization is awesome! I really like how this story is coming along! I can't wait to find out what happens next!

xx Rachel

Author's Response: Ah yay! Your back!!

Haha yeah i thinks she's quite cool in this chapter, a bit more relateable as a character a well. Yup Pansy is horrible, but she's got an important part in the story so can't cut her out yet! *Cries*
Draco and Hermione do get along so far, but you never know what might happen.!

Haha thank you ! I had to do that in my first year of high school, unfortunately minus throwing it everywhere, but i thought it might be something funny to incorporate!

I get what you mean about the caps and exclamation points. I'll go back through this chapter and have a look out for them, as well as the spelling mistakes, thank you!

Ah awesome! I'm just glad you enjoyed it! Thank you again for reviewing!!


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