Reading Reviews From Member: anythingcouldhappen
  
73 Reviews Found

Review #1, by anythingcouldhappenHPFF United Collaboration: The Quidditch Ban

10th July 2014:
House Cup 2014 review, educational decree #7!

This was such a great little story to read about James and Sirius and quidditch! You did a fantastic job with their characters and keeping them ic. I really enjoyed that you had Regulus in the story as well. Their combined skills were too much for Madam Pomfrey! Great job also with Professor McGonagall--she sounded very chilly and McGonagally when she was dealing with James and Sirius!

The flow of your writing makes the story very easy to read, and I really enjoyed the quidditch scene! Overall, this really made me want to read more Marauders again.

Awesome job!

Sam

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Review #2, by anythingcouldhappenHC Event 3 - Decoration Quandry: Friends

10th July 2014:
House Cup 2014 Review!

This was very sweet! I've always loved that Luna painted her friends on the ceiling, and it was fun to see her thought process as she decided on what to do. Luna is one of my favorite characters, and you did a nice job of capturing her personality. She did seem a little too cheerful for the circumstances, but I get that your story is not one focusing on the darker aspects of the war, so it works.

This sentence was a little awkward: "Each of the ideas brought up, both from suggestions and otherwise," Maybe you could find a way to reword it?

One question I had was how was Luna able to run home? I don't think Ottery St. Catchpole is close enough to Hogsmeade to do that. Perhaps you could find another way for her to get home? It doesn't really take anything away from the story, but it is a little distracting. Anyway, great job!

Sam

Running home

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Review #3, by anythingcouldhappenTo the Very End: To the Very End

8th July 2014:
House Cup 2014 Review!

:(

This made me so sad.

But in a good way!

It's heartbreaking to see Lee so old and broken down, but the fact that George is still there for him is really sweet. And their mischief! Of course they're still at it, even when they're elderly! You did a phenomenal job of writing them so old--definitely keeping them in character but also adding little things that would have added up through the years. Even though it was painful to see them so old, I love Lee and George being in the same nursing home. It's so fitting :')

Basically, you jus did a wonderful job of fitting the prompt! I loved it!

Sam

Author's Response: Thank you! I figured your friends are there for the laughs, but your best friends are there for you when you cry too, so it couldn't just be a nice little fluffy thing about pranks. +]
Though I was tempted. I'm so glad you liked it!

Thanks for such a lovely review!


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Review #4, by anythingcouldhappenThe Firework-Maker's Daughter: Legacy

8th July 2014:
House Cup 2014 Review!

THIS WAS SO HEARTBREAKING BUT THE PERFECT WAY TO END THE LITTLE SERIES!

Gahh I am so in awe of the way you created such a rich story in just three short chapters! You tied everything together so amazingly and I love love love that she set off fireworks at the funeral! It makes perfect sense for George's funeral, and also for Roxanne to choose to do that.

Also, FABULOUS job on Hugo and Roxanne's friendship! Again, you are ubertalented for being able to do that in such a short story! But you did, and it's great. The fact that there's such a big age gap there even makes it better.

This review is a bit all over the place, so I'll sum up:

YOU ROCK

That's all :)

Sam

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Review #5, by anythingcouldhappenThe Firework-Maker's Daughter: Bonfire

8th July 2014:
House Cup Review 2014!

Well the first thing you should know is that this actually made me tear up. So congratulations on that. I think when George told Roxanne she looked beautiful was when the tears hit me! I think you've done an amazing job of giving so much background and detail in such a short amount of words! Roxanne has such a distinct character, helped of course by the last chapter as well. I love how she's in Ravenclaw but still a troublemaker like her dad. It's so nice to see her take after him, not just younger Fred.

And she wears a skirt! I love that she's pushed past the bullies and isn't afraid to show her scars any more. That is just like such a strong message there I can't even handle it.

So thank you.

Sam

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Review #6, by anythingcouldhappenThe Firework-Maker's Daughter: Songbird

8th July 2014:
House Cup 2014 Review!

Hello!

This was wonderfully written! Every description is so vivid, and I could picture the menagerie and Roxanne and the fwooper so clearly. Writing in second person was such an interesting choice, and I think it worked so well here. It made the story a little more personal, but also kept the fwooper from sounding human either. So awesome job on that!

Roxanne is so sweet and so cool for breaking in and freeing the bird. I love her righteous indignation and the shopkeeper floundering for an explanation. One but I was a little confused about: You mention that he doesn't use a wand. After I read that, I expected it to play some part in the story, but then it didn't It feels a little unnecessary.

Anyway, loved it!

Sam

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Review #7, by anythingcouldhappenHouse Cup Event Three: Until The Very End: Until The Very End

8th July 2014:
House Cup Review 2014!

GAH

This was so sweet! Honestly it just made me smile because of its loveliness :) I love how completely simple it was, without any big climax or drama or anything. Just a tiny little story about a beautiful little friendship. The fact that he was a muggle, not a wizard, just made it even more precious. His faithfulness to her secret was so sweet, and his comforting her when her mother died.

BUT THE BEST PART WAS WHEN THEY WERE LITTLE! I just want to snuggle them both because goshdarnit they are so adorable! They sound just like cute little seven year olds--not too old or too young or anything. Just so funny and so cute.

Awesome job!

Sam

Author's Response: Hi Sam!
I'm so glad you enjoyed the way I wrote Hannah and Simon's friendship! I wanted it to feel real, with no dramatic fights or love triangles or any of that stuff. (Even though we all secretly love it. Haha) I wanted a simple story about two people and what happens when one happens to be a witch and the other is a muggle.
I loved writing them as kids! It's one of my favorite things to do, because I love exploring the unique view children have of the world. I'm so glad you thought they were cute!
Thank you so much for the review, Sam!
Cassie :)


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Review #8, by anythingcouldhappenThe Start of Something: Prompt 3 - Neverending

8th July 2014:
House Cup Review 2014!

Hi!

I really liked how you framed Dean an Seamus' friendship with the hatred their sons had for each other. It made a nice parallel! You did a nice job writing the kids--sometimes kids can come across too old or too young, but they sounded just about their age here!

I like that Seamus realizes all those plans he made with Dean aren't quite going to work out. Plans never do! :P It's so adorable that they made those plans though--a lot of times only girls are shown as doing that kind of thing, but obviously boys can just as easily!

Older Harry was written nicely too, so good job with that. I 'm always very picky about Harry and have a tough time liking a story if he seems ooc to me, but you got him down I think :)

Great job!

Sam

Author's Response: Hey, Sam!

Kids are kind of easy for me, because I have a lot of siblings and cousins of all ages. I'm glad you thought they acted their age. :)

Yeah, plans definitely never do. And Seamus is going to have to start again, but at least now he knows it's okay.

I'm glad you liked Harry. *loves Harry* He's like the only main character I feel comfortable writing. :P

Thank you so much for leaving a review!

Sam.


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Review #9, by anythingcouldhappenThe Start of Something: Prompt 1 - Lily's Fairy

8th July 2014:
House Cup 2014 review!

Hello again :)

I really loved how sweet and simple this was. Little Lily is very cute, and I like that you wrote it from the fairy's point of view. That's a unique approach to take, and it absolutely worked here. The fact that it was set at Christmas time just added to the sweetness of it. Holidays always make things cheery for me!

There was one part that was worded a bit awkwardly: ""Mummy will not smile," the little girl says, still laughing. "But I am. Does that make us friends?"" The 'will not smile' and 'but I am' don't quite match up. Maybe you could say 'wouldn't smile' and 'but I will' if that makes sense to you :)

Great story!!

Sam

Author's Response: Thank you so much. I'm glad you liked it.

I'll look at that. :)

Thanks for leaving a review!

Sam.


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Review #10, by anythingcouldhappenThe Start of Something: Prompt 2 - When Darkness Fades

8th July 2014:
House Cup 2014 review!

Hey!

I found your choice for the prompt to be very interesting. The beginning of the story you definitely make Harry's helplessness clear. The end with the little sliver of hope was great too. I like that they both felt out of place, for very different reasons. It allowed them to reach out to each other, which is so nice to see after everything that happened.

The one thing I noticed as you had a few sentences that were kind of rambling. For example, "Now they mourn, they hear words that are meant to be soothing and they try to heal from all that has happened, both to themselves and to others. "

There's just a lot of comma use going on! Maybe splitting the sentences a little more, or using a dash instead of a comma would change things up a little bit. Just my thoughts! :)

Awesome story!

Sam

Author's Response: Hey!

Yes, Harry is very lost after the war, they both are. They've lost so much, but there is hope. I'm glad you liked that.

I'll go through this again, fix anything out of place. Thank you for pointing it out.

And thank you so much for leaving a review.

Sam.


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Review #11, by anythingcouldhappenSolace: Comfort

6th July 2014:
House Cup 2014 review!

WAY TO BREAK MY HEART.

I mean seriously this was so exquisitely painful! The bit in the hospital was so cute between Katie and Oliver, but knowing he was dead made it so tough to read. I really loved the description at the beginning, about her dress and bleeding heart. They made the grief feel very real.

Oliver is so endearing, and I love the little details that make him so true to his character. Of course he thinks she's asking about how their season is going! And his thoughtfulness in why he bought the niffler for her is so precious. The way you've written their interaction really makes me want a whole story centering around their romance!

The end to this was lovely and heartbreaking as well, but somehow very hopeful. The last line is perfect and draws the story to a close so well. Awesome job!

Sam

Author's Response: Haha, if I had a nickel for every time someone has said that in a review...

I do really like this pairing, and I'd love it if you wrote something longer about them! I tried to keep Oliver true to his canon self with his mind always going automatically to Quidditch, and it was fun to explore Katie's characterization.

I do like to think of the ending as hopeful, because Oliver's gift helped Katie in ways that he didn't even anticipate. He may be gone, but she can still feel his love.

Thanks for your lovely review :)

-Amanda


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Review #12, by anythingcouldhappenThe Adventures of Abigail Higgs and Potter Boy: The One With The Four Hour Nap

13th March 2014:
Hi! Reviewing this for Blackout Bingo!

Michelle. Michelle. Michelle.

Can I strangle her? I know I've kind of said this in all my reviews, but's she's such a meanie! And not a true friend! "I just don't want you to get hurt" Yeah right! I'm beginning to think that Michelle is just super insecure and she hangs around with Abigail because Abigail is also insecure and a pushover to boot.

I really hope that Abigail makes friends with Isabella! She needs a better friend than Michelle.

Although, I have to admit, I'm still a little wary of James myself. It does feel a little too good to be true. I'm interested to see where it all goes and if it turns out their is some kind of motivation behind the whole thing apart from genuine friendship. I kind of hope not, but then again I know things are never simple!

Great chapter!

Sam

Author's Response: Yes, yes you can! Hahaha she is a massive meanie! She needs a good talking to. She's not a true friend at all, she thinks that she's helping but she's really not.

She will, there shall be more Isabella around. She's better for Abigail.

I would be wary too, especially after everything that happened, but maybe he's genuinely being nice? Maybe he has an ulterior motive? :P You're right, things are never simple.

Thank you Sam! :D


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Review #13, by anythingcouldhappenThe Adventures of Abigail Higgs and Potter Boy: The One With The Change In Friendship

13th March 2014:
HI! Reviewing this for Blackout Bingo!

Ooh honey! That's come up before... *grins* How interesting that James smelled honey in when he smelled the amorentia. What a coincidence! Oh and the parchment too? Interesting, interesting!

I"m glad to see that James is paying more attention to Abigail, even if right now it's only about guilt. Also, he's already a better friend to her than Michelle. Don't even get me started on Michelle in this chapter. I have now figuratively punched her. She just can't be happy for Abigail can she?! Ok, she's jealous, but being nasty to Abigail is not going to help that. At least Abigail recognizes that their friendship is not at all healthy. Recognition of the problem is the first step to change right?

There were a couple of times when I think you changed from past tense to present tense. It was a little confusing to read, but nothing major. Again, this chapter felt a little short. But if that's what you're aiming for, go with it!

Awesome chapter :)

Sam

Author's Response: Yes! Yes it has come up before! I'm so glad that you spotted that. :D Yes yes yes! :D Ah I'm so happy that you spotted those. :D

It may be 60% guilt and 40% liking her... although that amount will go up soon.

Oh Michelle, she brings out so many emotions in people. :D Haha yes! I'm glad that you figuratively punched her, she deserved it. :D
No she can't just be happy for Abigail, mainly because the attention isn't on her.

Ah no! I shall go back and edit it, so thank you for pointing that out. :D

Thanks once again Sam! :D


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Review #14, by anythingcouldhappenThe Adventures of Abigail Higgs and Potter Boy: The One With The Chocolate Of Forgiveness

13th March 2014:
Hi! I'm here yet again, reviewing this for Blackout Bingo!

James' apology was so adorable and awkward and just generally funny. I'm not sure I trust him or the chocolate, but I still loved this chapter. I am a bit curious as to why James apologized rather than Barry and Elijah, since it was actually their fault. Suspicious...James is an interesting character, and I want to see more of him.

As for Abigail, her reaction and feelings were great. I actually felt like I was reading about myself in this chapter. While I'm not like Abigail in a lot of ways, this chapter showed a part of her that was very like me. The thing that stuck out to me most was the turning over the chocolate in her hands. I do that when I'm uncomfortable or not sure what to think!

Michelle.she needs to have some redeeming qualities or I am going to figuratively punch her. She's such a jerk to Abigail!

Great chapter!

Sam

Author's Response: Well hello again! :D

Haha I'm not sure if I would trust his chocolate either, especially if I knew that he was hanging around with Elijah and Barry. The reason he apologised instead of them is that they ... honestly don't care, that's the basic gist of it. They're not nice people. There shall be more James! don't you worry! :P

Aw I'm so happy that you could connect with Abigail, I wanted to have her as realistic as possible so it's great to hear that she had quirks like other people. :D

She does have some. eventually... It's just she doesn't always show them.

Thank you so much! :D


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Review #15, by anythingcouldhappenThe Adventures of Abigail Higgs and Potter Boy: The One With The Love Potion

13th March 2014:
Hi! Reviewing this for Blackout Bingo :)

*raises hand* I hate Barry and Elijah! Seriously, that was such a nasty thing to do. I can't even imagine the kind of embarrassment that that sort of thing would bring. Poor Abigail! And to have it happen pretty publicly! With Ron, at least it all happened pretty early without anyone seeing. And of course it creates a whole awkward situation for James and Abigail now. I'll be very interested to see how they deal with it!

I am also still very irritated with Michelle. She is not a good friend, and its frustrating that she's Abigail's only friend. She deserves better than a friend she lies to and is embarrassed to tell things to because she know Michelle will tease her! I really enjoy all your characters--in that they're realistic enough for me to love and hate some of them already.

One thing--what do Barry and Elijah look like? What about William? Professor Noble? I think they could use a little more description. Otherwise, I thought this chapter was really well done!

Sam

Author's Response: *raises hand as well* ELijah and Barry need their heads knocked together, they're pretty mean and don't seem too bothered about what they've done. I feel really sorry for Abigail, and James when he finally comes off of the love potion.

She really isn't a good friend, she needs to be a better one definitely. Hopefully Abigail branches out soon, she doesn't deserve to be treated like that.

Thank you so much :D Ahhh I forgot to add descriptions! I have gone back and edited some in. :P

Thank you once again! :D


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Review #16, by anythingcouldhappenThe Adventures of Abigail Higgs and Potter Boy: The One With The 'Supportive' Best Friend

13th March 2014:
Hi! Reviewing this for Blackout Bingo :)

I loved the way you expanded on Abigail's character in this chapter! She's clearly got a lot of room to grow, and she's flawed--which is always good and realistic! Her friendhship with Michelle is interesting. I'm not going to lie--I hope she at some point she confronts Michelle about the way she treats her. Michelle is a bit of a jerk. I hope she's got some good qualities to her--because right now she seems really selfish.

I'm of course hoping to see more of James in the next chapter! I love me some Potter kids ^_^

The chapter felt a little short, but I think it works. Mainly because you lay out some more of Abigail's character. All the writing and everything was great! My favorite part was probably when Abigail was talking about food...I love that she has being close to the Great Hall as a pro of being a Hufflepuff! It was pretty amusing to read, especially because I agree with her :)

Great job! Can't wait to read the next chapter!

Sam

Author's Response: Hey! :D

Thank you, I really enjoy writing Abigail, she's a fun character to explore. Very different to the other female characters I've written about. Oh at some point Abigail is going to snap and tell Michelle exactly how she feels, but when that'll happen...

Of course there shall be more James soon. :P

Haha that would totally be one of my favourite things if I was in Hufflepuff. :P So I had to make it hers as well. :D

Thank you so much Sam! :D


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Review #17, by anythingcouldhappenTask One Challenge: Reclaiming the Sword of Godric Gryffindor

13th March 2014:
Hi! I'm reviewing this for Blackout Bingo :)

I really liked this! You wrote all the characters very well I think. They all talked and reacted as I would expect them to. My favorite part was when Neville cast at Snape. Although he was scared, he was able to overcome that and attack the man he feared the most. It really shows the kind of development he went through to get to the point he was at when the trio meets him at the end of DH!

Overall, this was very well written and all your descriptions were great! I especially loved when you described Ginny with her blazing hair and eyes! I wanted to point out two slight errors: "dizz. His mind was filled with endless scenarios where all of this could end so bad." I think you mean to have "dizzy" and "badly" :) A quick edit would fix that!

Awesome job!

Sam

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Review #18, by anythingcouldhappenThe Adventures of Abigail Higgs and Potter Boy: The One Where James Knocks Me Down

13th March 2014:
Hi! I'm reviewing this for Blackout Bingo :)

I really like the comic book theme! There are so many next gen stories on the archives, and I think having a theme like this sets yours apart! And comic books are so much fun. I love that Abigail has a slight obsession with them--I haven't read many stories with a main character like that before! Abigail seems like she's going to be a very interesting and unique main character.

I'm very curious as to how she and James are going to be interacting...and how their friendship/relationship/whatever it may be develops. From the fleeting glimpse I got of James in this chapter, I like him! He seems funny, and also like pretty nice guy.

Your writing is all very nice and clean and flows very well. Nice job!

One thing I just have to thank you for--she changed into her robes!!! Thank you! There are so many stories that have students just walking around in their ordinary clothes and it always bothers me! It's so off canon, and it doesn't even make sense. So anyway, thanks for that!

Sam

Author's Response: Hey! :D

Thank you so much! I wanted to try and have this as different to other next gen stories as I could, so that's where comic books came in. Oh yes, Abigail has an obsession with them.

Ah their relationship develops a lot over the next few chapters so you will see a lot more of James soon. :D

Thank you so much! *squishes in a hug*

Hahaha I'm so glad that you liked that part, it always bothers me too! Why wouldn't they get changed? They're going to school haha. :D

Thank you once again! :D


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Review #19, by anythingcouldhappenBedtime Stories: Bedtime Stories

13th March 2014:
Hi! I'm reviewing this for Blackout Bingo!

I really liked this :) It was a very creative way to show Gryffindor traits! I expected to read something about a battle, but certainly not a battle as a bedtime story. Ron's retelling was really cute/funny, and it makes me wonder how many other stories the next gen kids got re-told in a funny way from their parents.

The interactions between Ron and Rose are all very cute, and realistic I think. Sometimes in stories kids can come off too old or too young or just wrong, but I think you nailed it! Ron is such a sweet dad, and I loved the way he even took out his wand, and how proud he was of his acting! The end bit with Hermione was so sweet.

Just one grammar sort of note: You wrote "stood in the doorway" and its kind of awkward. I think it should be "Hermione stood" or "Standing".

Awesome job! This was really fun to read!

Sam

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Review #20, by anythingcouldhappenBeen There, Done That: Living Up To The Name

7th March 2014:
Hi! Reviewing this for Blackout Bingo :)

This was a nice little introduction! I'm very interested in the fact that you put James in Ravenclaw! I've never seen anyone do that, so I'd like to see how you develop his character in such a way as to point to him belonging in Ravenclaw. Perhaps its his pranking genius?

I'd like to see little more description of his friends. It seems like he's just kind of thrown in there with a bunch of them and there isn't much of a proper introduction. If you left that for future chapters, that makes sense, but I guess just make sure its soon :)

There are a couple instances where your sentences are a little run-on. For example: " All this time he had done it by hand, no magic was required and so James Potter turned to the next cauldron in line for cleaning and took a deep breath. " If you reworded it, it would be a little clearer.

Like I said, nice start! Hope this helped :)

Sam

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Review #21, by anythingcouldhappenIcing on the Cake--Part II: Viktor [Speed Dating Entry]: Part II--Viktor [Speed Dating Entry]

7th March 2014:
Hi! Reviewing this for Blackout Bingo :)

There are so many things to love here!

George giving Viktor love advice? Priceless. It was so funny and actually quite good advice. I think you really nailed George's characertization :) Also, I am in awe of your ability to write both Krum's and Fleur's accents! They were spot on! Nice job!

I enjoyed Fleur giving Lavender advice as well. Ok, I guess I just enjoy advice scenes in general. Yours were great! Lavender's a bit crazy--but that's what we love about her right?

I think you did a great job with descriptions as well! You really built up the atmosphere which was nice. I think one thing you could add is a little more description of Lavender. Krum talks about her being beautiful, but he doesn't mention much specifically.

In terms of grammar and stuff, it was all fine except some places where you had two lines of separate dialogue in the same line. If you get the chance, you might want to fix that :)

Great job!

Sam

Author's Response: Hey there! Glad to see you over here for Blackout Bingo. I'm sort of jealous. My computer broke, AND I was on spring break, so I haven't been able to participate as much in the Black Out as I'd like. It looks so fun!

Thank you! George's advising Viktor in the ways of love was easily my favorite part to write! Have you ever had a magic moment in writing when it's like the character is just whispering what they'd say into your ear? That's what it felt like with George--easiest dialogue I've ever written, and so fun to do!

I enjoyed writing the scene with Fleur, too. I guess I like advice scenes, as well, since I included two in the same one-shot! ;)

Lavender IS a bit crazy, with a side order of muy loca, but that is, indeed, why she's sort of lovable. She's never boring, that's for sure.

Thanks. I'm glad you liked the description. I love writing those parts. Originally, there was more, but the story was for a contest with a fairly small word limit. However, now that the contest is over, maybe I can take your suggestion and add a bit more in the way of details! Specifically of Lavender, since you're right, she isn't depicted very specifically. Thanks for pointing that out--I might not have noticed, at this point.

Ooooh! I didn't notice that about the dialogue. I'll have to fix that ASAP. Thanks for telling me! And thanks for reading and reviewing! I really appreciate it.

--Penny


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Review #22, by anythingcouldhappenWarfare: 1 September, 2022

7th March 2014:
Hi! I'm reviewing this for Blackout Bingo again :)

I loved seeing the other half of the pranking war that this year holds! They've definitely got to step up their game if they want to win! James and all his friends seem like likable guys, and I think you just need to make sure you keep developing them as you keep writing. They've all got a lot of potential!

Your descriptions were perfect! Everything in the scene just stood out so clearly to me. I think you do a great job with the action and dialogue just flowing really nicely :)
One thing I'm a little confused about--why is it James' last year? You gave reasons for all the Ravenclaws leaving, but why James? Forgive if I just missed it :P

My favorite part was when James was trying to persuade the other two to go along with his plan. He's clearly got a lot determination! I'm interested to learn where his "blaze of glory" takes him!

Great job!

Sam

Author's Response: Hi!

Yes, James and the Lions will all be developed a bit more later. They're a less talkative group, which means their back stories will be even richer than the Claws (maybe...)

It's James's last year because he's in seventh year :P It's James and Fred in seventh, Raph in sixth, and Liam in fifth. I thought it would be more realistic to have them in different years.

Thank you for reviewing! :)

--Monica


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Review #23, by anythingcouldhappenThe Worst: Decisions and Discoveries

7th March 2014:
Hi! Reviewing this for Blackout Bingo :)

So.

I. Want. To. Kill. Delilah. Jones.

But actually.

I CANNOT believe she did that. Of course its probably more complicated than it appears, but if she actually made such a deal and now I guess hopes to profit off Dom's story--that is so twisted. She is corrupt and heartless and I really want to strangle her. She just changed Dom's life irrevocably! You can't just do that to someone! She took away Dom's future children! Honestly that's the part that gets me the most. I know adoption is a great option, but that doesn't make the pain Dom must be feeling any less.

Argh!!!

I am so frustrated. So angry and frustrated. What a stupid, hateful woman.

In other news, you have made me get more emotionally attached to Dom than I have been to a fanfic character in a long time. Congrats! *claps*

I really liked this chapter, because it kept developing the dynamic between Dom and her family and Teddy. That was nice. I hope Bill comes in more in the future chapters!

Great job, again!

Sam

Author's Response: Hey! Thanks for reading and reviewing!

Delilah is definitely twisted, and there's more to her reasons than just a story which we find out in later chapters. And yes, the not being able to have children part is probably the worst of effects that the bite had =(

I am quite flattered that my story brought out such a strong reaction out of you. I am pleased you could get emotionally attached to Dom. Thank you so much!



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Review #24, by anythingcouldhappenNoble: Noble

7th March 2014:
Hi! Reviewing this for Blackout Bingo!

This was really well written! I'm so impressed that you managed to write this so quickly for Bingo! All your descriptions are stellar, and I loved the beginning and ending. They're nicely tied together and they also fit very well with the rest of the story. Your sentences are just so well-crafted. They create a very vivid picture--one that is so clear and interesting to see.

"He thinks of the stories his father used to tell him--of grand houses with the Gaunt coat of arms across the archways, of wizards who could cower as they passed."

This was a really nice bit. It made me think about what the Gaunts must have been at some point. It makes you wonder how they got to their lowness! I think this was a nice and unique choice for the challenge. Its not often we get much insight into the Gaunts!

I was a little confused at Morfin's sorting. How is the young men staring down the table connected to Morfin's sorting? Maybe I'm just missing something?

Author's Response: Hello! :)

I'm so pleased you liked this, and I can fun whipping it up! The descriptions were quite fun to write, and I'm glad you liked how I tied them together as well. It's really great feedback to hear the scenes felt vivid, I really appreciate that!

Yes! I imagined the Gaunts losing their fortune and blaming everybody but themselves for it. It was quite interesting delving into Morfin's head, and although he's not very relatable I liked bringing him to life for a little.

Ah, I can explain! Morfin was upset that nobody in Slytherin was caring about his sorting and admiring him. Instead, the boys were checking out the girls and were far more interested in beauty and love than in Morfin and his "greatness." Kind of like Merope and how she loved Tom Sr., and how Morfin couldn't understand that because he's incapable of really figuring out admiration and love. Does that make more sense? I'll definitely go back and make that scene a little clearer when I get the chance, thank you for mentioning it! :)

Thank you so much for the lovely review! :D


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Review #25, by anythingcouldhappenThe Flesh of the Servant: Coward

7th March 2014:
Hi! Reviewing this for Blackout Bingo!

I love what-if stories. They always make me think of the infinite possibilities, and the world too! Its amazing that if just one tiny thing changed, the whole world can be changed! *ok squee time over*

It's heartbreaking to see what might have been, if only they had been able to stop Peter that night! I mean sure, perhaps Voldemort might have eventually made his way back in some other way, but Harry would have had a much happier childhood! Sirius wouldn't have died in the way he did! It makes me so mad/sad to think about it!

You did an awesome job imagining the what-if, as well as describing Peter. I liked the way you began and ended the story with "Peter was a special sort of coward". It was a nice touch.

The one thing I had trouble believing is that they would just go ahead and administer the dementor's kiss as soon as Peter was caught. They would probably have a lot of questions for him and Sirius before they were ready to do that. Maybe you could have the conversation be about how Peter will get the kiss if it turns out he was guilty? Just a suggestion :)

Great job!

Sam

Author's Response: Hey there!

I also love what-ifs...as well as AUs.

This is a happy story, though, other than helping Voldemort return, Peter was a rather unimportant character up until his death thereafter.

Because I erased the original version of this, I was left with only a couple days to get this finished by the deadline for the challenge, so it was a little rushed. Sorry for anything that could have been extended!

-Rumpel


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