Reading Reviews From Member: marauderfan
1,408 Reviews Found

Review #26, by marauderfanCausatum: Harry

8th April 2016:
Grace, this is AMAZING. This is such good writing, and I love how you've gotten into Harry's head in this really dark time after the war. I mean, the book ends on a hopeful note, but I think it highly realistic that Harry would suffer some form of PTSD after all he had experienced and seen - and all that by the time he was only seventeen. I love that you touch on Harry's feelings of guilt as well, because this is something that rings so true with who Harry is. Whenever anything Voldemort-related happens in the series, Harry always feels responsible (e.g. the snake that bit Arthur Weasley), and until Hermione and Ron insist on going with him to find Horcruxes, Harry was thinking of doing it himself. He always takes too much on himself and here you've extrapolated that into how he takes all the blame as well, which I find so believable.

Those first few lines especially are so powerful! How do you take on that much? And what you pointed out about Harry being a part of a machine - this is true as well and really sad that others were planning out all these things that he had to do. Dumbledore knew the whole time all that Harry would have to go through.

Your imagery throughout is stunning. I love all the dark shapes and stuff and the fact that nothing has any names - not the demons, and not even any of the characters. It kind of reinforces Harry's loneliness and how he feels like he's so alone in all this.

This is so good! I'm really glad I stopped by to read it.

xoxoxo ♥

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Review #27, by marauderfanInevitable: Inevitable

3rd April 2016:
Yay, Scorbus :D I'm always down to read Scorbus.

This department at the Ministry that you've created sounds really cool and I am now wondering if you discuss it a lot in your related fic, because if so I need to read that! It sounds great and I love the idea of adapting technology to a magical environment. Is that one of the things they do? Aah, it just sounds so cool, and it was probably about time for the magical world to adapt to the times a little. I mean, the most technology they had in the 1990s was from the 1940s. And magical inventions! It does sound like a cool place to work. Another thing I love about it was that the news about the opening of the department came from Percy and it was really exciting to both Al and Rose. I love seeing Percy in this light, as someone his niece and nephew look up to rather than the typical "annoying Percy" we see in fic (and the books).

I think it's also very realistic that a couple that got together at the age of fourteen because they were such good friends would maybe break up later just because they were better as friends. It felt realistic. Like they were just together out of habit at that point, and Scorpius did seem a bit subdued - as anyone would be after ending a four year relationship, but as Al points out, not terribly upset either.

And Rose probably saw something going on between Albus and Scorpius - the way they interact or look at each other or whatever, and she realized that what she and Scorpius had together wasn't as strong.

I'm glad it worked out for both of them at the end! Aww! This was lovely and now I'm going to have to find the other fic this goes with hhehehe

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Review #28, by marauderfanThe Last Thing On Her Mind: 1998

2nd April 2016:
not going to lie there are tears in my eyes after reading this, much like when I read the chapter of DH it was based on. I love seeing this scene from Lily's POV - after being dead for 17 years, suddenly she has this brief moment of existence, or something like it. And I love that you used second person as well! It feels so perfect for the POV of someone who's kind of there but also kind of not. Second person is kind of particular in terms of the situations it works with, and a ghost/imitation that exists for a few minutes is a perfect use of that POV. I can't really explain it. I just love it.

Ahh, she can't look at James because she doesn't want to see transparent, imitation-James :( And the thoughts she has looking at Harry. I loved the contrast you made between when they were all in hiding and in danger but happy - her memories all of Harry smiling and laughing - and the present time, with Harry walking towards danger and how his eyes have 'a weight that should not belong to someone so young' - gah.

You yourself are not any older or wiser, but your child is. He looks at you with quietly pleading eyes, searching for the guidance and wisdom of a loving mother. -- ahh, this killed me. The fact that this imitation of Lily and James is as much of them as he will ever remember, and for once he just wants his mother's advice. :'(

Sam, this really is gorgeous. I love the prose in this - I feel like my review can't even come close to articulating how much I loved the story. ♥♥♥ You rule. Amazing work on this story.

EVERYTHING (about this story) IS AWESOME.

Author's Response: And you're back ♥

You've already seen my reaction to the final line of your review on twitter, but I just have to say again that I love it so, so much.

I wanted to, but wasn't sure if I'd be able to capture the emotion of the DH chapter with this. It was extra frustrating, because I lost the original version of this chapter when my laptop died, and rewriting a chapter always feels like making a pale imitation. And so I am really glad to hear that you felt that this was so powerful, and your tears do me credit.

Okay, I know I am emotionally exhausted, but I almost cried reading your summary of what I wrote. Like what? ANYWAY

Thank you so much for your amazing reviews ♥ I am really honored that you were able to get them in before disappearing from internet land.

Love you so much!


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Review #29, by marauderfanThe Last Thing On Her Mind: 1981

2nd April 2016:
This chapter tore my heart to shreds. Omg. But so beautiful. I loved the way you showed Lily and James' last hours doing something so mundane, just playing Mr Hippogriff with Harry, and while there's so much to worry about, at least they all have each other.

(though I think it was 1981 when James and Lily died, not 1982? But I don't have my books with me so I could be wrong.)

Would leave a longer review but I'm about to watch a movie with you instead. I guess I could have worse reasons for leaving a short review. Just know that I loved this chapter ♥

Author's Response: Hello again!

No worries about the short review - hanging out with me AND watching the Lego Movie is like the combined best excuse ever.

I apologize about your heart. I tried to warn you that there would be feelings, but I suppose that doesn't help much. I tried to make the beginning cute to balance what was to come, but I suppose that makes it worse emotionally. Sorrynotsorry.

Agh, thank you for that correction. Looks like I had it right in my story document and made a typo on the story editor. Fixed now!


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Review #30, by marauderfanThe Last Thing On Her Mind: 1972

2nd April 2016:
Sam. I heard great things about this story so I was excited to check it out! And so far I am not disappointed. In fact, the opposite of disappointed. This is amazing so far and I love the approach you're taking to Lily's character here.

The beginning of this is heartbreaking, about how Lily and Petunia used to be inseparable and now when she looks in a mirror, she sees the absence of Petunia. It's such a sad way for her to be starting off her birthday, too! The way everything fell apart between the two sisters is honestly one of the saddest things about the series.

I also love that you chose to write about Peter. So few people write about him, but there's so much to him as a character, I think. And this scene with Lily and Peter is so touching - how he's struggling with dyslexia (which makes sense - he's smart enough to become an Animagus, so he is intelligent, but dyslexia would make school just a really difficult thing and in anything involving reading he'd of course be behind the other students, which we know to be likely true). In particular I loved the line where Lily asks if he has dyslexia and he instinctively says "No!" without knowing what it is. I found that very realistic, especially for an 11 year old!

And I really appreciate the parallel you drew between the two of them being so lonely and left out, and that's why they became friends. That's probably the best thing about this story, just how believable it all is. And it kind of breaks my heart a little that her friendship with Peter kind of helps fill the hole in her heart that's been left by Petunia, knowing what he does to her and James later.

On to the next chapter!

Author's Response: Yay Kristin! I'm so glad I got featured in your fabulous reviewing spree today ♥

I'm also really glad that you chose to read this story. I don't typically write Marauders, as I feel they've been done to death and I enjoy exploring characters who don't get so much attention, but I did really enjoy characterizing Lily and Peter here.

I agree with you that Peter doesn't get written about in fan fiction a lot. I think people just prefer not to think about him, but he was best friends with them all when he was young, and it does them all a disservice to ignore him.

I tried to look at things a little differently here, and I'm really glad you found it so believable. Fair warning, there are strong feelings to come.


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Review #31, by marauderfanSaving Severus Snape : xii.

2nd April 2016:
Meg. ♥ I can't believe there was a chapter sitting here that I hadn't reviewed yet, but I'm kind of glad because it gave me a chance to read it now. Yay! So here goes!

This was a great chapter. You are such a talented writer and I really love this story! Even though I don't like Snape. :P But the fact that we see everything through Hermione's eyes, and Hermione is someone Snape insulted on more than one occasion, it's really effective at portraying Snape through a sympathetic light while also not ignoring all the horrible things he does later, because Hermione keeps remembering them (in this chapter too, with her mentioning how he called her an insufferable know it all.)

The fact that Hermione still has to pretend that Dumbledore is her uncle never stops being funny. I'm impressed that she can keep a straight face about it. Also, I think you did really well writing her panic about leaving - she's here to do a task, and when Hermione sets to a task she DOES that task until it's complete - this is who she is, and being told that it's time to go before she's finished would be really alarming for her, because in her eyes at least, she's failed at her task. And this is Hermione's greatest fear, essentially - so I think that panic of hers was really spot on and you did well with writing it. At least she still has some time!

That Benjamin Franklin quote is hilarious xD Have I mentioned before that I love how you write Dumbledore? You've mastered that completely enigmatic quality that he has and it's just really good. Props.

Poor Amelia, Hermione has been neglecting her a lot lately to hang out with Severus. I mean, okay, Amelia does have other friends, whereas Severus has none. But Amelia has been nothing but kind to her so far. Also, way more perceptive than Hermione, whom I shall now call Cleopatra, Queen of De-Nile. (denial. get it? :P ) Hermione totally does fancy him but can't admit it - and I mean, with good reason, as she knows who he becomes and she's not there to fall in love with him. Bwahaha.

I love the way you describe how wandless magic feels! That was really cool. And I think you wrote Snape spot on there about how he wouldn't ask for help, but just stays silent and that's how Hermione knows he is asking for help. That whole scene was really sweet though at the end when he brought lunch for both of them. He just wants a friend. Aw. ♥

Amazing writing, Meg!! Love you ♥ ♥ ♥ *hugs* *more hugs* (I'm in a hug mood lately)

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Review #32, by marauderfanThe Lark and the Nightingale: Huge furry problems

2nd April 2016:
Okay, I can understand why Remus thinks he can't tell anyone about Chiara's family's history because it's not his secret to tell, and we all know how much he respects secrets. But... thinking he alone is responsible for finding out what happened to Chiara - he is putting way too much on himself there, and it doesn't have to be that way!

Also, a whole MONTH she's been gone - wow. That's terrifying. I really wonder what happened to her! I wonder if she got trapped inside the pages of a Shakespeare play. Probably not. Where can she have gone though! I assume it's related to the curse. I hope you reveal this information soon because I'm terrible with suspense :P

Wow, so usually I review as I read but I just got so engrossed in that transformation sequence - the lead up to it about how his friends were nervous to go meet him in the Shack, and then how he attacked them and warned them away. I was basically glued to the screen while reading this and just couldn't look away! It was such an intense scene and you did a marvelous job writing it.

This was a great chapter!!

Author's Response: Poor Remus... I agree, he shouldn't think that way... I just feel like he is the sort of person who doesn't want help from anyone, because he doesn't want to bother them and he doesn't think he deserve it. He is a bit of an idiot...

I think next chapter should give you all the answers about Chiara. She didn't end up into a book, that I can tell. Sorry for the suspance, by the way...

That's one of my preferred scenes too! Even if I think it could've been worded better... But thank you!

Thank you so much for all the lovely reviews! As I already said, they made my evening much more serene than it was before! I really hope I'll see you back here again soon!

All my love, my dear Kristin!

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Review #33, by marauderfanThe Lark and the Nightingale: So sorry, Sev.

2nd April 2016:
I liked that you went into Snape's pov here, and how even he is upset that Chiara is missing. I liked your analysis of his 'friends' Avery and Mulciber though, how he's not particularly fond of them but they're okay and they like him.

Lily's conversation with Snape was sad, but I still don't feel that sorry for Snape. I'm not his biggest fan.

Ahh!! Lily agreed to go out with James! After the initial reactions of the other three Marauders when he asked her, I think the next chapter will open with the three of them all fainting with shock. Maybe Lily and James will both faint from shock too, come to think of it. And then Snape, because everyone knows he's watching the whole thing from across the hall. And then Madam Pomfrey will probably freak out as she'll assume there's some sort of epidemic going around.

Or I suppose I could be jumping to conclusions too hastily :P

Author's Response: I love Sev's POV! So sassy and dark! I love sassy! :P

I liked the idea of him and Chiara being friends, sort of. I imagined, since they they were both Lily's best friends, they were brought together and ended up liking each other. So, yeah, he's quite upset too.

Ahahah! Avery and Mulciber! For some reason, I can't think of those two as particularly brilliant. Mulciber especially. I see them as a sort of Crabbe and Goyle. I guess Severus would like to have around someone who appreciated him, even if not the brightest of people. :)

I don't think they would've ever worked together anyway... even without the Mudblood incident... I do feel a tiny bit sorry for him (but I'm not his biggest fan either...)

Ahahah! I want to rewrite next chapter to include it all! Too funny! Madam Pomfrey would definitely panic! Maybe she would faint as well! :P Have I ever said that I adore you?

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Review #34, by marauderfanThe Lark and the Nightingale: Someone to blame

2nd April 2016:
And... cue Remus' guilt. I knew it was coming. He is so predictable in that he'll blame himself for just about anything. And for someone who's generally so reserved, who just holds in all his anger and resentment and directs it inwards on himself, to see him lash out and actually punch Sirius was like :O

You write Dumbledore really well! I'm so impressed because he's a character I struggle with.

That paragraph about Peter was heartbreaking! How he always feels left out and forgotten when his friends fight, because he's not important enough to be involved in whatever is going on. I do feel badly for the guy. Thank you for giving him a voice in this story.

ahh everyone is so hurt and this is just so sad. I must know what happened to Chiara! Reading on :)

Author's Response: Yes, that's something so predictable about him... Well, he does unleash his anger at times. I was always impressed by that fight with Harry in DH. I think he just needs to take it out with someone else at times, when it becomes just too much. (Never enrage a quiet person, they might turn dangerous...)

Oh, do I? I feel I can't really capture his complexity... But thank you for that... *blushing*

Poor little Peter... I think my passion for him started writing this story. He will have quite some space in later chapters (and I'll tell you in advance, it won't be pretty...)

Sorry for the sadness... It will go on for a bit, I'm afraid...

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Review #35, by marauderfanThe Lark and the Nightingale: The Capulets's curse

2nd April 2016:
Haha, Bianca snuck in there too fast, apparently. So... yay, 100 reviews! *hands out cake*

WHAT IS THIS?!?!? I was so happy at the fluffy ending of the last chapter and now asdhfkajdhlfa? I mean, I knew you'd give them couple-drama eventually but I didn't expect it to be RIGHT AWAY. WHY IS CHIARA UNCONSCIOUS. Um, is Remus that bad of a kisser? :P

Ah, I love the Room of Requirement. Remus needs Madam Pomfrey's help, so a door appears to her office, right there.

Okay this is totally my favorite chapter so far. I LOVE the backstory on Romeo and Juliet being wizards (as well as a lot of noble people), and how Shakespeare's account of the story isn't historically accurate. This is so great because so often when people dramatize someone's life story to make it a movie/book/whatever they end up changing a lot, and this just rings really true, what Anna Nightingale explains here about the Montagues and Capulets! Ahhh! so great.

And then Remus asks if Romeo had a Furry Little Problem, as if he's forgotten that not everyone calls lycanthropy that. Gah, I'm dying of laughter.

So Remus and Chiara's love is forbidden by more than just Remus' affliction, but also by a curse. I hope Remus finds an answer in that diary! And let's not forget WHERE IS CHIARA? How did she disappear, and where to? So many questions omg

this was an amazing chapter though ♥

Author's Response: 101! What a lovely number! It's prime and palindrome! :P

Yes... I know... I know... I'm sorry... (but not really sorry...) And for the record, Remus is a wonderful kisser!!! (ok, actually I can't be sure, but I guess he is...)

Ah, you noticed that! The Room of Requirement is awesome that way! ;)

Glad you liked Anna's explaination. I love Romeo and Juliet's backstory as well! And yes, that aspect of dramatization is exactly what I was thinking about.

Remus spends too much time with James and Sirius... Happy to know I made you laugh! :D

Questions will be answered soon, I promise!

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Review #36, by marauderfanThe Lark and the Nightingale: Help from Padfoot

2nd April 2016:
Chiara ♥ I realized this story is only two reviews away from 100 which is so exciting!! ah! so here I am with #99 :D I was going to do it yesterday but then the archives turned such a blinding shade of red and yellow that I got a headache trying to read. So, here we are. :P

Ahaha, I love that Sirius and Lily are working together at matchmaking for their friends, as the friends in question are too much in denial to admit their feelings. I particularly loved this exchange between the two:

"Don't worry. I have the perfect plan. Do you trust me?"
"Of course not!"
-- haha, can't blame Lily for that response :P

Haha, they literally closed their friends in a room together to figure things out. I guess that's one effective way to get people to talk to one another! :P

"Since Romeo is supposed to take the initiative, but apparently he seems unable to do so, then I suppose it's up to Juliet, don't you think?" -- You go, Juliet! :P I mean Chiara. Ah, I love that it's the girl taking the initiative in this scene. I adore reversals of traditional gender roles. But YAY! THEY TALKED! And they finally kissed!! *dances around happily* Please let them have some time being happy together before you break them up because of Remus' guilt complex. Which I have a strong feeling is going to happen, because Remus.

And once again I love your use of the Shakespeare quotes in this :D Ok, onto the next!

Author's Response: Dearest Kristin!
First of all, thank you so much for all these awesome reviews!!! You made my day one thousand times, especially since yesterday was such a sad day for all of us... :'( But let's not think about that now...

I can't believe this story actually reached (and surpassed) 100 reviews! You and Bianca are the bestest!!! And yeah, I know what you mean... The FBFF skin what a bit painful for the eye... :P

Sirius and Lily working together is the best thing ever! I need to write more about those two, they are so much fun!

And yes, locking them up should be quite effective... ;)

Oh, come on... We know which is the stronger gender... :P Yes, they talked... And yes, they kissed... You already know what's next, so I won't comment on that... (but please, don't hate me too much...)

Glad you liked the Shakespeare quotes, too! :D

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Review #37, by marauderfanThe Lark and the Nightingale: Wherefore art thou, Remus?

31st March 2016:
I have two things for you: 1) *snowball hug* muahaha

and 2) a review!

She found herself thinking that Romeo wasn't that great of a character after all. A guy who claims endless love for a girl and then he sees another for an istant and totally loses it? How can someone trust a person like that? What had ever Juliet seen in him? -- Haha, this was my favourite line of the chapter. (My second favourite line was the serious/Sirius joke, of course.) Romeo isn't that great of a character, I agree! He's also not that smart as he takes actual poison when Juliet is just faking. But I think Chiara is only thinking these thoughts because it's not Remus acting with her today. Otherwise she'd find Romeo just lovely :P

Also HE SAID HE LOVES HERRR. I bet he's going to pass that off as a 'I love you as a friend' sort of thing unless Chiara admits her feelings, like Lily suggested. And that's such a daunting thing to do! Especially when the person in question is a close friend who you see every day. If things go wrong then it's awkward. These decisions are always so much easier in fiction than in real life! :P

I loved the conversation at the end, and James and Sirius trying to dissuade Chiara from going to visit Remus in the hospital wing. Dragon flu... It could have been believable to a first year maybe, but not to anyone with any experience around the Marauders. I don't blame her for not believing them!

Another wonderful chapter! I loved the section with Remus and Chiara reciting each others lines to one another. And James trying Shakespeare lines on Lily as if that's going to win her over any faster, haha.

Lovely work! ♥

Author's Response: KRISTIN!!!
There's only one thing I love more than surprise reviews... and that's your surprise reviews!!! (Ok, it might be a tie with Bianca's, actually... *whistling*)
Oh, and snowball hugs! Who doesn't love snowball hugs??? *snowball hug rolling your way!!!*

Ahahah! I think that so! If Chiara was acting with Remus, her opinion of Romeo would change drastically! :P

Yes, he did. And he can't take it back now. :) Yes, things can be complex when there is a long friendship, but in fiction they are definitely easier... except maybe they aren't? But you'll find out more if you keep reading.

I doubt Chiara would easily believe anything coming from James and Sirius. Especially if they are talking about dragon flu. Eheheh!

Thank you so much! So glad you came back here and enjoyed this chapter! I really hope I'll see you back again soon!!!
Love you, my unreliable friend!!!

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Review #38, by marauderfanMonochromatic: Just an Epilogue

31st March 2016:
Leigh! How dare you! :P haha but really. I now have far more questions than answers and please tell me there is a sequel in the works?

This chapter was terrifying though, how she is aware of everything that's happening but totally paralyzed. That's such a scary idea to me, not being able to move at all and having no control but aware enough to perceive everything that's going on around you. *shudders* it just freaks me out. That'd be like the most claustrophobic situation imaginable. And you really went into that here, with all the scary details and what she feels and hears as she just lies there.

How did she get better? What was the secret? What happened to everyone else? If you don't write a sequel at least write a blog post saying what happened because I can't handle the suspenseee!

Also, N chamber. Was there never an F at all? What are N and P, and what's the other one? I'm not ashamed to admit I have literally sat here for about five minutes brainstorming possibilities for what the chambers are. But I've come up with nothing.

This was an incredible story. It kept me guessing up until the end - and even past the end! You told it in such a captivating way and I really admire how well this is written. Great work and I'll totally be looking out for more!

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Review #39, by marauderfanMonochromatic: Just Like That

30th March 2016:
this may be a useless review because I'm one click away from the epilogue and akjdfkajdfka!??!? it's over, just like that? But... so many questions! Also, if I were Cara I would not have let James go alone, I'd be terrified that people were lying to me and that they were going to take him to the F chamber instead.

I have a lot of feelings but also a lot of questions and I will be back on the last chapter! Sorry, I can't wait :P It's all because you're a fantastic writer and your story is addicting.

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Review #40, by marauderfanMonochromatic: Just a Nightmare II

30th March 2016:
Leigh!! I'm here with a very long-overdue review. Truth time, I actually read the first five chapters of this during nominations for the Puff Story of the Month, but I did it all in one go and didn't stop to review (the story is hella addicting) And now I see you've finished it, so I had had to come back and read the rest! So very sorry I didn't review the first five chapters, but now that I have a bit more time I'll try to make up for that here when I read the last three.

The tone you've set up in this story is really incredible and haunting. I particularly love how you've structured it with each chapter opening with a bit set later in the future, when things have improved in terms of the plague being gone but have stagnated in terms of Cara's personal life and her inability to move on from what happened - she's clearly still struggling with PTSD and has isolated herself in a world where she is anonymous, which is not helping her cope. Escapism is only getting her so far, because her demons are still there. And it's the same for James it seems.

So the future bits are dark and sad, but the sections set in 2022 - these are downright scary. And you've cultivated this scary mood so well by revealing just enough information to tell the story, but left out so much. I think the scariest thing about it is just how much is unknown. Why did the school get into this weird militaristic culture? Why will no one tell them anything? How did the plague start? And above all, what happened to the people in Room F and are they still alive? What happens to the sick people? So much information is being concealed from them. Actually, it reminds me a bit of the Orwell novel 1984 in how everything is told in secret through rumours and no one actually knows what's going on for real. (also 1984 is one of my fave books so that's a huge compliment fyi :D)

Lily's disappearance hit hard in the previous chapter, because it was the first one since the quarantine. And here, people start dropping like flies, with both Erika and Freddy. It's really interesting how you've pointed out how little Cara does in her free time. Sometimes she reads, but mostly she just survives. Surviving takes work. And yet it's not fulfilling, leading to her feeling so empty.

And that last line. Ah! I really love your writing. I am so intrigued by this story and there really isn't anything else like it. Looking forward to reading more.


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Review #41, by marauderfanBetween the Cracks: What Goes Up

30th March 2016:
Hi ladies! I am here for two important reasons: 1, because you left me such wonderful reviews on When Summer Fades - thank you! and 2, because you two are awesome! Also, this is my 1400th review, celebration in order: *hands out cake*

Loved your writing of the sorting and welcome feast! also wow Eleanor is a heavy sleeper, I can't believe she fell asleep at the feast and woke up the next morning - not even waking up while being carried by two people haha! I love how friendly the Hufflepuffs are though and how welcoming the upperclassmen are of the first years. I think the hufflepuff first years are probably pretty lucky as they get to feel right at home with such a friendly crowd! Not that I'm biased or anything :P

Then an array of desserts came -- fun fact: I accidentally read this at first as "an army of desserts"

Yay for Eleanor actually performing a Transfiguration spell on her first day - that's a big deal, good for her! I think you captured both sides of McGonagalls personality here, how she's quite strict with the class and doesn't tolerate people goofing around, but is also very encouraging and supportive, and rewards good work. And she even sassed the one Ravenclaw who was being a bully to Eleanor! McGonagall is such a boss.

It makes me sad that Hufflepuff sometimes has the reputation among the other houses as being 'duffers'. Being nice does not make you an idiot. I don't know where that stereotype came from but Eleanor handles it pretty well and doesn't let it get to her - she's made of strong stuff! :)

Great chapter!

Author's Response: Hello again! Thank you so much for visiting us again! Oooh, I'll take some cake! :)

We were trying to not use too many lines from the books so we had her fall asleep during Dumbledore's speech. Besides, I'd really want to fall asleep after a day like that! Oh, no, who would ever be biased towards Hufflepuff? ;)

Heehee, that's one of the best misreadings I've ever heard.

We wanted Eleanor to be born with incredibly strong magic which is why Dumbledore didn't send her the letter since he mistook her for a wizard-born. I absolutely loved writing McGonagall here, I felt like she would have taken a liking to someone like Eleanor, which was why we wrote her like this.

Eleanor got our loyalty. You'll see in future chapters how she'll always defend what she thinks is right, leading to a bit of a stubborn streak in her.

Thank you again for reviewing this chapter! We always love your input!

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Review #42, by marauderfanAfter: One.

30th March 2016:
Dee!!! ♥ I promised you AGES ago that I would read this, and I'm so sorry it's taken me months to do so. But I'm so glad I had a chance to read it now.

I... wow. I kind of just sat looking at this review box for a few minutes trying to organise my thoughts and come up with words that could adequately say how I feel about this story, because saying "this is really amazing" or "great writing" just feels too shallow. There is so much in this story - it's so emotional, so raw, so real. I kept getting chills while reading the story the whole way through (and now I'm really cold) because your writing is just that powerful here.

Thankfully I have never had the experience of having a child that died, but I did lose a member of my family far too young, a few years ago. And many of the things that I felt after that appear in this story - everything from the shock of it and trying to get used to the idea, the heavy weight of grief, the misplaced guilt, to the experience of having all these memories of the person that keep cropping up. And that is all magnified in this story, seeing these familiar feelings show up but from the point of view of a father who lost his son in the worst way possible. I can't even imagine. He was waiting for Cedric to return out of the maze as a champion, expecting the best, and then was given the absolute worst news instead, which he could absolutely never in a million years have seen coming. I can't imagine anything worse than that.

This ends on such a heartbreaking note, with the way you structured it backwards in time, the ending is the most raw as it's right afterwards and just kind of leaves a gaping wound in my heart. It builds up as it goes back in time, and really is just crushing to see how he struggles to deal with it. And I have it say it's utterly genius what you did with the line about time healing all pain, how it starts out six months later and Amos still has not healed, instead his senses have just been dulled. And then to return to that line at the end when Dumbledore tells him that, it brings it back to remind the reader that it doesn't, at least not for a long time - longer than six months. The structure of this is brilliant, and reinforces every emotion you're trying to convey by making it more intense as I read on rather than dulling that pain with the time it takes to read it. Very cleverly done.

So yeah, this was a beautiful story, Dee, and I can absolutely see why you won a Dobby for it. Incredible work. ♥

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Review #43, by marauderfanA Foreign Affair: Chapter 1

30th March 2016:
Kayla! While I wait with bated breath for new chapters of Mean I figured I'd check this one out as it looks really good, and I was not disappointed!

So yeah, as you mentioned in your A/N, it may have a bit of cliches in it, but it's just so FUN to read. I love it! :D Her family sounds crazy and all meddling in each other's lives, but you can tell that they're all really close and care about each other so much no matter how annoyed they are with each other. It's evident that Astraia's mum sees her four kids as the centre of her world.

But poor Astraia, with her mum always after her for not having a boyfriend or any plan for her future family! That must get so annoying :P Especially with that bit of info at the end about how there is a guy she's interested in, but the fact that he's the Head Auror's son doesn't help matters, nor does the fact that the Head Auror is in fact the most famous person in the wizarding world. Based on what I've learnt of Astraia's Mum so far, I wouldn't be surprised if she sent an owl to Harry Potter if she found out who Astraia liked. This is probably why Astraia has been silent about it all :P

I have a feeling I'm really going to enjoy this story. I will be back to read more later (once it's not night time and I'm not falling asleep in my chair haha)

Awesome chapter! ♥

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Review #44, by marauderfanWithout You: A Very Special Delivery

30th March 2016:
Hi Jayna, you star chaser! (meaning that you were a chaser on the quidditch team and that you were a star, not that you chase stars. I'm sorry, it's late and my brain is mush.)

This story was lovely! Right from the beginning I loved your OC Genevieve and how she interacts with her brother. The fact that he told her she wouldn't get a letter, and the fact that she yelled into his ear and made him congratulate her on her letter... Siblings haha. These two are just so believable and it's perfect. It's also great how well you've managed to get Genevieve to sound her age. She does sound just like an eleven year old here, from her fierce determination to prove her annoying older brother wrong, to the fact that she still thinks her parents are the greatest and wants to share her good news with them and hasn't gotten too cool for that yet, to her thoughts about her father away at the war and how it affects her. She's such a perfectly portrayed eleven year old.

What a wonderful birthday surprise for Genevieve ♥ that's so wonderful that her dad was able to come home and be there for such a special occasion for her. I know that isn't always possible with military families (or at least I don't think it is) so that makes it extra special that Genevieve was able to share that with her dad. You wrote the reunion so well, and I loved how you built it up so the reader sees the surprise unfold through Genevieve's eyes.

This was great. Well done Jayna :D

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Review #45, by marauderfanLove, Minerva: August 1954

30th March 2016:
Hi Renee ♥

This story was so sad! :( McGonagall's story as a whole is really sad, tbh. She is definitely the sort of character who thinks with her head rather than her heart, which explains why she made the decision she did about leaving the person she loved, but the way you wrote it here makes it even more painful, because this letter is so deeply from the heart.

And actually, I think the only reason she wrote it from the heart is because she knew she would never send it.

I love your descriptions. It can be hard to do that in epistolary writing - scene setting and stuff is usually a lot less important in letters, but you managed to put in all these details of the scene in these little glimpses of nostalgia, and it fits perfectly. I love the picture you painted of their relationship together and how he would go off through the dew to feed the horses while she made tea. It's only one short letter, after she's already left, but it says so much.

The way she left is just heartbreaking too, that she didn't provide any explanation, she just vanished. I suppose it would have been harder to come up with an explanation or to try telling him she didn't love him anymore, when she still did. While I feel terrible for Doug, having this happen to him and for him to never know the truth, I feel worse for Minerva for having to make that decision. Trying to choose between her life of academia and magic, and the love of her life, and knowing that whichever she picks, she'll regret not having the other. I can't imagine having to make that sort of decision. But even as she writes it, I can tell as the reader that she knows she made the right choice, with that paragraph about her mother who made the opposite choice she did. As Minerva sees it, she mas more of a place in the magical world, and she will be someone there - she has more to give. Whereas if she stays with Doug, she loses so much of who she is.

Gah this just gave me all the feels. You took a very sad moment and that personal touch of turning it into a letter made all the difference. This is absolutely lovely writing, Renee.

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Review #46, by marauderfanPurge and Dowse, Ltd.: Welcome to Janus Thickey

29th March 2016:
Katie! I love this so far, and we're only two chapters in. I just really appreciate the approach you took to this fic. There are a few fics out there about St Mungos, but I think most often they focus on the lives of the Healers. But there are other people there and you've really made me think about them. Agnes the fur faced lady is kind of just written off in the book, but she has her own story that no one would ever think about. And I'm so glad you did.

I'm also so glad it's you specifically, because I know some of this is drawn from your personal experience and that makes the story 100% richer and more real. You're able to add the details, the particular beautiful moments and difficult moments, that an author without that kind of prior experience wouldn't think to include. Basically I have really high hopes for this story and I know it will live up to my expectations because your writing always does, so don't worry :)

Also, a good chunk of this chapter is an interview and I can relate so much to Felicity's thought process throughout, the whole "I wrote some questions down in a notebook where did I put the notebook" or "I forgot my good qualities that I was going to talk about" - this was literally me this week and oh man. Felicity, I feel ya.

The cameo from Alice and Frank! Ahh! I am really interested in seeing them from a pov of someone who doesn't know who they are already. And all those different people who were mentioned in the books but we never found out how they got that way or what their story is. I bet some of them have really powerful stories. After all, just looking at Frank and Alice, Felicity probably sees this sweet old couple, not a couple of previously badass Aurors who stood up to Voldemort three times and were just totally epic people. And I'm just so excited for how you're going to share all these people's stories and with the personal touch you're putting on it, it is so far nothing short of amazing. I really can't wait to read more of this.


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Review #47, by marauderfanPermission: Start Running

29th March 2016:
Hi Karen! Wow... this was a very unsettling story. I feel like I'm being watched. And while I know there's a wall behind me, a little part of my mind keeps thinking I'll find Barty Crouch Jr there instead. Was that necessary? Like, I WOULD like to be able to sleep tonight. :P Kidding aside, this is really well written. and once again I'm so impressed at the way you write such an immersive dark tone.

I absolutely adore second person and I think it was used to great effect here. I don't think I often see it used this way - as in it's someone talking to Lucius secretly but whom Lucius does not notice. As the reader I am simultaneously immersed in Lucius' past and memories, but also in the narrator's thoughts, which border on obsessive. If it is Barty C though, some of what he says is pretty justified. I mean, neither Barty or Lucius is a particularly good guy, but Lucius had basically no loyalty to Voldemort. He put himself first, so he was into the Death Eater mission until it no longer served him anymore, and then he didn't care. Barty was loyal, whatever other issues he may have had. And I can see why he would absolutely resent Lucius' flightiness for that reason.

I'm intrigued by the dawh dawh dawh as well. The way I read it, I interpreted it as footsteps chasing behind Lucius. Following his every move but just out of sight, which the narrator seems to be doing. Or I guess it could be dramatic music, like maybe along the lines of what you'd get in an Alfred Hitchcock movie in a suspenseful scene when something's about to happen. That's the vibe I get from it. Though I'm also curious to know what you intended them to be.

So yeah, this was REALLY well written, Karen. Now I'm going to turn on all the lights and make sure I'm not being followed. :P Great story!

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Review #48, by marauderfanHero: Wake Me Up

29th March 2016:


I feel like I should have seen some of this coming. Most notably, Noah and the boy who wanted to scare him and hurt him. You're set out all the pieces long before now and I'm just starting to put them together - assuming I'm right of course - but Noah was raised in an orphanage, which we've known since like chapter 1, and now it's all falling together because wasn't Noah one of the names of the kids Tom Riddle used to torment at the orphanage? Even if he wasn't a canon name, I'm like 99.9% sure it's the same orphanage. He knew Tom Riddle and he was one of those kids Tom bullied. Omg omg omg omg ogmogmgomg this was just so cleverly told and I'm freaking out and I still don't even know the whole story? GAH. you are such a good storyteller.

And Finn! Is he telling the truth or not! I don't know how he would know about the locked doors, but it doesn't sound like anyone else did that, unless the bird was an Animagus of Finn or one of his friends? Unlikely, but I still suspect foul play in Noah's death. Or um... fowl play? (Too soon? I'm terrible, sorry :P )

Poor Morgan. At the beginning of this chapter he seemed like the nice guy who just gets pushed aside because Hero likes Tom, but now I think there's potential there, now that Hero is angry with Tom for being prejudiced against Muggles. And she doesn't even know the whole story! She is going to be F U R I O U S when she finds out Tom was the person Noah was talking about.

So they've figured out that a magical creature may be responsible for the petrifying attacks. I wonder if people actually figured that out or whether Tom let slip a bit of information so it can sound like he figured it out.

This was a wonderful chapter Bianca! Love your writing as always!

Author's Response: I'm sorry to have such a short reply to your wonderful review - I'm just refusing to say anything! Thank you so much, I love hearing from you! Xx

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Review #49, by marauderfanAlmost.: Almost.

27th March 2016:
Hey Roisin! Saw your post on twitter and I'm sorry you got a flame review! I'm here for the Fundraiser Review Competition :)

Honestly I don't know what anyone could possibly have had to flame about this fic. I think you did a wonderful job with it and tackled some really important issues, handling the mental state of the characters really well.

I can't even imagine how difficult it would be to return to Hogwarts after everything Hermione had seen, including her friends dying and being tortured right there at school. School has always been kind of a safe haven for Hermione, I think - it's her place where she succeeds and feels comfortable, and suddenly a battle destroys it all and she's just been through so much that it's not the same and school isn't that safe, comfortable place anymore. Everything has changed. Her listlessness and the sense that she's kind of suffocating in too much work speak really well to how she's handling it, and to me it was pretty clear she's suffering depression, probably along with PTSD as well. I thought you showed this so well and how she hates herself for it but can't bring herself to get going - it was heartbreaking, but also so easy to envision because it felt quite realistic after all she's gone through.

Phew, long paragraph, sorry! I also wanted to talk about the other characters in this - George for one, also suffering but in a different way. Rather than just avoiding doing anything at all, he's trying to take on too much, as if just working will help him forget for a few moments that Fred isn't there. He was remarkably well written too. Gah, your characters are so wonderful and I just love how much you've gotten into their mindset.

I loved how you wrote Lee in this as well. He doesn't show up in fics as much as he should! And this fic shows what a remarkably strong person he is. After all, he just lost one of his two best friends in the world, so he's suffering from that, but also trying to help his one best friend who's left stay afloat with all he's dealing with, and just taking care of people in general while dealing with his own things. I like that he was able to help Hermione get back on her feet again just by asking her to help move boxes. Simple task, but it gets her to do something, and she gets a hug. Ron didn't seem perceptive enough to notice that she needed one, so thank goodness for Lee.

Paler stone has been fitted in to smooth castleís battle wounds -- think you're missing a 'the' in there

The scheduleís been get shuffled a lot around construction -- looks like that sentence got shuffled a bit as well :P

anyway, this was wonderful, Roisin! I'm glad I stopped by your AP again - you're a talented writer. :)

Author's Response: GAH it is so hard to respond with this aggressive red and gold color scheme! B-b-but, I really wanna reply to your review :) [Also, THANK YOU for catching those errors! Scurrying to edit now!]

Honestly, the Flame wasn't even responding to this story. This weird anon obv has some sort of personal bug about Hermione and projects it onto fics for no reason. (This was the third time they'd left an anti-Hermione review on one of my stories, and said the exact same thing, despite me showing VERY different sides of Hermione).

ANYWAY, I LOVE your point about Hermione's relationship with school! That's definitely something I was thinking but hadn't really been able to put into specific words. (Just, like, LOOK AT HER SAD). School was something she always EXCELLED and DOMINATED at. So to have something so important and wrapped up with one's identity become traumatic must really suck. (I say that as if it's abstract. There's def some autobiography here). BUT ANYWAY, I was also interested in the fact that Hermione's Boggart was basically "academic failure," so I wanted to see her confront the prospect of academic failure.

I'm SO glad you thought I showed PTSD and depression. I wanted to present those experiences accurately and honestly, but not, like, overly explainy. Anyway, I'm SO relieved both those elements came through and that you thought they seemed realistic.

And I'm REALLY glad you dug George here. Your analysis is ABSOLUTELY YES. Again, something I was sort of trying to do but couldn't put words to outside of showing it. George is very much lashing out while Hermione is collapsing in on herself. They're both struggling with the same illness, but manifesting it in different ways. I HOPED people would think each reaction fit the characters well.

LEE! I seriously can't believe he isn't written about more. I was SHOCKED to discover he isn't even a character you can list in a story! HOW? HE'S SUCH A GOOD CHARACTER. Here, it became one of those moments where I love fanfiction. If we didn't already know his character, it might seem like he's Fine and nothing's wrong. Because you're right, he's really resilient. But he's also more subdued here; not being a jokester, hyper-aware of everyone around him, walking on eggshells, etc.

As for Ron, this is sort of an "unreliable narration" situation. This story really isn't very fair to Ron, because the characters aren't. I TRIED to subtly show him doing the right things, but then have the POV characters brush it off or misunderstand it. Like, for Hermione, her and Ron really do love each other, so she trusts his love to be unconditional and kind of takes him for granted (not fair, but I HOPE understandable). With Lee, even before he really recognizes his crush on Hermione, it's there. As a result, Lee's less than charitable to Ron and focuses on things he thinks as negatives (often petty things, like not being able to handle spicy foods). But I think, if you look objectively at Ron in this story without the clouded judgement of the POV characters, he's doing as well as anyone could expect.

BUT, yeah, Lee. I guess I wanted to show that little flickers of affection and intimacy with people can be important, and confusing, but not necessarily a Big Deal in a Romance sense. Like, it's just part of being a Whole Person. And Hermione and Lee are both really worthy characters, and deserve one another's adoration. Not everything tender has to be Sexual or Relationship, and things that aren't Sexual or Relationship also matter.

Basically, I Friend!Ship Hermione/Lee.

Oof, thank you SO MUCH for leaving such a thoughtful review. You always leave such amazing reviews that make me feel fuzzy and worthy. I feel like this story still needs work, but I did put a lot of myself into it, so I'm relieved you thought the Thingz resonated!


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Review #50, by marauderfanForgetting: Exquisite

27th March 2016:
Hi Angie! Turns out I've read a lot of the stories on your AP, but there's a few I haven't :P So, I'm here with your prize review 1 of 4 for the Your Least Favourite Challenge!

This was SO good! AH! I loved the kind of minimalist approach to each scene, just focusing on the tiniest details like the ticking of the seconds, Rose's heartbeat, Scorpius' smile in her memory. You don't really tell anything. Instead you show all these small things and it adds up to create the whole - classmates moving to friends with benefits and then to a relationship, whereas Rose falls in love and Scorpius falls out, and then there's a barrier between them. The way you illustrated this was just gorgeous! It was such a lovely style.

Her thoughts are a reckless splash of memories on blank canvas. -- this is basically perfection

When he arrived, I was DEFINITELY not expecting what came next. Of course after remembering it's for the Dark Turn challenge I should have expected it, but you really caught me by surprise there. I had to read the last few lines twice because I got to the end and was like "WAIT 'EVEN IN DEATH'?" That's a pretty severe way to get closure, but I guess she got it :P Totally a dark turn though. And then it kind of colors the rest of the fic in retrospect, and rather than Rose coming across as sympathetic for having her heart broken by someone who didn't fall in love with her when she fell in love with him, it comes across more that she's an incredibly darkly flawed person, who would rather see her lover dead rather than with another person.

This was so well written - I loved the style of writing here and the way you twisted it at the end! Amazing work!

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