Reading Reviews From Member: marauderfan
621 Reviews Found

Review #1, by marauderfanPlay the Devil: The Feast

8th April 2014:
Hello! I apologise as this is going to be another short review but this was a great chapter! So, Sir Nicholas... he seemed a bit evasive when talking about his "education" far away, as in probably Hogwarts. And based on the time period of this story, I presume that he is none other than Sir Nicholas de Mimsy-Porpington, the not-yet-nearly-headless Nick. Ooh, and I just looked back at that section and he is even wearing a ruff. Very clever, Jenna :D

I also have a suspicion that "Annie" is Anne Boleyn, but I would have to refresh on my medieval hhistory to make sure.

Great use of historical (and HP canon) figures in here, it was an excellent chapter! I think if I knew more about this time period, I would know what's going on there with the symbolism behind the card game, but at the moment I'm wondering as much as Rose. Btw, I like that Rose isn't super into history so she figures stuff out along with the reader, it's more of an adventure of figuring things out.

Awesome job!

Author's Response: Hello! :) Hey, never apologize for a review being long or short - I'm always just excited to hear your thoughts!

Muahaha. I have been so excited to post this chapter for so long and to see if anybody would recognize him! :D My mom (who I send the chapters to as I write them) took a little longer to figure it out, but then again she isn't quite as knowledgeable about HP as we are over here at HPFF. :P I figured the ruff would be a good signature style for him - ruffs never go out of vogue for Sir Nick. :P

Anne Boleyn comes a little later, in the 1500s with Henry VIII. However this Anne is pretty conniving as well, to be honest, and is quite similar to how I would write Anne Boleyn. So maybe I had some unconscious inspiration here? "Annie" Lovell was a real person, though her personality is of course made up.

Thank you! :) Hmm, I'm toying a bit with how much historical context to include here, or to let the readers find out as Rose does. Basically, there's a lot of betrayal going on and getting charged with treason could be as simple as having an offensive card game. :P I really do just make a lot of stuff up while writing though, to be fair.

Thank you so much for the brilliant review, Kristin! ♥

 Report Review

Review #2, by marauderfanLove and Be Loved: Hope Is Real

4th April 2014:
You're right, this is some of your best writing! Wow! I really like the use of POV, the way it speaks directly to the reader as well as Rose. This is such a sad issue and I think it's good you chose to address it, particularly jn this way.

I like how you integrated the vision statement too, how it's in dialogue tags interspersed throughout the rest. To me, it makes the story seem as if Fleur is saying those italic parts out loud to Rose, and the rest is just Fleur thinking, or perhaps writing it to Rose. I like that you chose an aunt rather than Rose's parents to narrate, too - someone a little distanced from everything but who has still seen Rose grow up and is close to her.

My favorite part was the bit about hope at the end. I think everyone can relate to that.

excellent work onthis and good luck in the challenge!

Author's Response: Hi hon! Thanks! I'm so glad you liked the POV, and the way I chose to address the topic! It took me a while to decide on my approach.

I really wanted the vision statement to have just that more power in the story. Because it really is so important that everyone know that. I'm so glad you liked this and thank you SO much for reviewing hon!

xoxo Sarah ♥

 Report Review

Review #3, by marauderfanClementine: Clementine

3rd April 2014:
For our review swap!

I recently tried the Every Word Counts challenge as well, and I love seeing what people can do with only 500 words to work with. You conveyed a lot in such a short story, I could really connect with Fleur's insecurity and nervousness. I liked the way you pointed out the colours as something she focuses on, like the one thing she can control. I really liked your descriptions of her indecision about colours.

Aw, I loved the way you wrote Bill! I imagine that during the day when Fleur didn't see him, he was nervously practising his French :p but I love the way he asked her out, it was so cute!!

This was such a cute one-shot, really well done with the characterisation in a short amount of words, showing another side of Fleur, and great descriptions. Thanks for the swap!

Author's Response: Hey there! Thanks for stopping by! :)

I love it too - I'm always so amazed by how well people do, particularly since I'm terrible at keeping things short :P I'm so glad you liked Fleur - she was an interesting character to explore. I've written her once before, and I love showing different sides to her. The colours aren't something I can wholly claim credit for, since it was for the Colour and Emotion challenge colours had to be a part of it, but I'm so glad you liked how I used them! :)

Haha, yeah, probably! ;) I wanted to keep him as being confident in himself and sort of strong enough not to get caught in Fleur's web as it were, but speaking in another language is always nerve-wracking.

Aww, thank you so much for the review - I'm so happy you liked it! And thank you so much for the swap, too - it was really great! I really enjoyed it! :)

Aph xx

 Report Review

Review #4, by marauderfanLying Josephine: Breakable Girls and Boys

3rd April 2014:
New chapter! :D

Once again my feelings went on a bit of a roller coaster here. The beginning section was a combination of sweet and ridiculous - the idea of Fred's gift was just so sincere and the jokes involved kind of cancelled out the sincerity ahaha but I loved the delicate balance between Fred's nervousness and cheeky arrogance while Josephine looks at the snowglobe.

oh and I loved the bit where Fred is secretly just 5 years old, poking Jo repeatedly and saying hey until she gives up, and her determination to keep silent until he gives up!

The second part was so sad, but I'm glad Jo listened to her internal Fred-voice, because I think that did help George. Honestly, I love that Jo knew Fred well enough to hear his voice advising her, because he would know exactly what to do when it comes to George.

Lovely chapter, Tanya!

 Report Review

Review #5, by marauderfanEverto Trucido: Superhero

2nd April 2014:
"I will if you get your spatula out of my face." I bet this was loads of fun before they cleared all the culinary embellishments of the archives. Anyway, I actually did come here to review instead of giggling about the April Fools prank, which is over.

lol, I like Grace's tactic for talking to people. Surprise attack conversation! It has worked before, so why shouldn't it work every time?

She finally told Snape about portal hopping and demon slayage...and told Marlene and Lily and Alice too. Pretty soon it will be the whole school! Hopefully its not too important of a secret... oh wait it probably is.

And Grace gets interrupted in the bath again. This is becoming a common theme of this story. Perhaps you should change your story summary...right now it says some stuff about demon slaying but I really think it should say "This is a story about getting interrupted in the bath." :p

oy vey. Sirius and Marlene are fools. Open your eyes, fools. (That's me talking to them.)

and another cliffy!

(Sorry, looks like you're never going to get a normal review from me either.)

but anyway, great chapter, Rumpel!

Author's Response: Oh hai!

The April Fools joke was pretty fun! I did spend some time reading Everto while it was :D. I think my favorite part was in Amends and Negligence... "Kitchen Safety had taken an interesting and slightly frightening turn... 'Miss Pastry! Take out your spatula!'..." There was so much in that chapter that was just fantastic. :D

Anyway. The attack conversation seemed right down Grace's alley... And, it was mildly effective!

At some point in the second chapter (or possibly the third) I added a brief conversation as to why she didn't want her secret revealed. It was after you'd read it of you know ;). Basically, it's not a big deal to have people know...more or less an inconvenience.

Lol, it does happen quite a bit, perhaps it should be in the summary ;).

Yes, fools :D. That's okay though, I've got plans!

Normal review? What's that? It doesn't sound fun, lol. I was going to make the chapter longer, but I hadn't updated in so long I thought it be a good length to transition back into the story :D.

THANK YOU! &heats;


 Report Review

Review #6, by marauderfanCareful What You Wish For: Christmas Surprises

2nd April 2014:
AAA OMG DANI AND OLIVER!! Finally! Awkward Oliver is cute, actually :p ok,I'm interested to see what happens now, because Dani and Oliver are just going to be even more weird around each other now, and Kat will totally know what's up haha. And what's going to happen to Radley after Dani breaks up with him (that needs to happen soon)? He's still obsessed with her.. Haha that scene where he randomly showed up at her house was hilarious. This was an awesome chapter!

Author's Response: WOO! I was so excited to post this chapter, I'm happy you enjoyed it!

Awkward Oliver is very cute. I had a lot of fun writing this chapter! And yes, Radley and Dani really need to break up soon. Radley is just...creepy!

Thank you for another lovely review. You are seriously amazing!


 Report Review

Review #7, by marauderfanThe Girl from Slytherin : The Fall of the Ministry

31st March 2014:
So intense, this chapter! I can't even. Jhdfjhgrsihsdsh

The letter from Terry was cute! Please tell me they see each other again before the Prologue... :-/

The part where Tor was reading the magazine and Pyxis found it... that was just the saddest thing, because clearly it's that which led to Professor Burbage's death, and Pyxis wouldn't have done that if he knew what the consequences would be. He is in such a tough situation, almost worse than Tor, because although he himself is breaking no rules or doing anything to cause suspicion from either side, he knows too much. He's trying to protect people but isn't forward thinking enough to consider the consequences of what he does, and I think that will end badly. I really like Pyxis as a character. Poor kid though, he's so confused. I want to give him a hug.

I love that they have extendable ears from the Weasleys' joke shop. Blood traitors or not, everyone respects a mischief enabler :p

Astoria's birthday is the same day as Voldemort died the first time. That's probably not significant but I just happened to notice haha.

She is really close to cracking. Eek! Hold on just a few more months, Tor!

Not surprised at the selection of Head Boy and Girl.. Pyxis as prefect? Great, because he needs more stressful things on his plate at this point in his life.

I love the way you're slipping these brief references to canon things in here btw - how even though Tor isn't entirely sure what's happening, its clear to the reader what has happened, like Professor Burbage's death, Harry's escape, Mad-eye Moody's death, etc.

Also.. I found a typo, somewhere in there it says "upmost" which should say "utmost". ;)

Anyway, this was a fantastic chapter! Great work as always! ♥

Author's Response: Hi Kristin! :)

Eep, I know! There was so much going on and it's such a dark time. I hope the next few chapters will be equally intense as a lot of trouble is coming Tor's way.

Hmm...can't say much there. :P

I know! :( I found that moment really hard to write, especially since Burbage was a character I really liked in this story. It's so careless of Tor, and foolish of Pyxis, and I think if Tor found out she would feel guilty for a long time. I really like hearing your thoughts on Pyxis - you're right, he's in a really hard spot because he's almost more "in" with the Death Eaters than she is, and he isn't able to protect himself and her in the same way that Tor can through her Legilimency and even some of her relationships. I really like him too, and I'm glad you care about him! :)

Haha! Extendable ears seem like the most useful thing. I wish I had a pair sometimes!

Hmm, you know what, I actually never made that connection! I had originally picked that as her birthday because it was easy to remember and I wanted it to be in that section of the story/year, but I didn't realize it was the day of Voldy's downfall. Interesting...I might have to mention this someday. I'll have a shout-out to you when I do! :D

She is - and things are really not going to get much better, I'm afraid.

Haha, yeah, there are some ulterior motives to the choices of prefects and Heads. Pyxis was never cut out to be a prefect.

I'm really glad you like the mentions of canon! I like tying in how they might effect or come to Tor, even if she is quite sheltered and clueless at the moment.

Excellent - *goes on typo hunt.* :P

Thanks so much for the amazing review, my dear! I really love hearing your thoughts and appreciate the feedback so much! :D

 Report Review

Review #8, by marauderfanFluorescent Adolescent : crushed moon extract

30th March 2014:
Saw this on the recently updated list and randomly clicked, haha. this is a great opening chapter! I already have a clear grasp on what Effy's personality is like, and the kind of inner monologue narration is a lot of fun to read. You've done really well establishing your characters personalities and their relationships/interactions with each other.

Also..." More drama than the Downton Abbey Christmas special..." love it. I died laughing. That's one of the cool things about next gen fics, you can put modern pop culfure references in. Honestly, I don't read a lot of nextgen for some reason, but I really like this one so far! It's well written and entertaining.

keep up the great work!

Author's Response: thank you SO much! i'm really happy this interested you, especially as you don't read a lot of nextgen. to be honest, i was pretty proud of the downton abbey reference, so yeah i'm glad you found it funny! thanks so much for reviewing- i hope the rest doesn't disappoint! bea xx

 Report Review

Review #9, by marauderfanThe Deathly Children: At The Churchyard Again

29th March 2014:
Yay new chapter!!

Flammable sneezes... dragon pox must be the worst. Ok now for the real review.

Ooh, the part about Kendra doing a Memory Charm on Bathilda was intense! Bathilda made a good point, though. Also, I think someone's put a Memory Charm on me, because I can't remember (if it was even mentioned in DH) why they never took Ariana to St. Mungos for possible treatment in the first place. But you made a mention of it here when Kendra reacted, so I'm hoping you go into that a little in future chapters.

Ariana's POV is always interesting to read. I can never tell what's real and what's not, which is rather fitting as I suppose it's all real for her, including the crone in the wall.

I didn't expect Aberforth to be the first one to meet Grindelwald! That encounter did not really surprise me, though, given their personalities, both a bit hotheaded but Gellert more in control of his temper and much more manipulative. And after this, I can certainly see why Aberforth would be especially annoyed at Albus for spending time with Gellert - someone of whom his first impression was already negative, and then adding that to the fact that Albus stops looking after Ariana.

So Albus met Gellert! I think that despite his insistence that there's not much to the Deathly Hallows, he's going to start researching all he can about them because of what Gellert said, and of course because I think Albus is the type of person to have to go research something just to find out more and satisfy curiosity.

Excellent chapter, teh!

Author's Response: *squishes*

Eee, thank you, Kristin! ♥

I can't take credit for the flammable sneezes; I read in the HP Wikia that dragonpox sufferers may sneeze sparks, and I just thought it would be funny if those sparks were actually highly flammable haha. Guess a person with dragon pox should never go to a gas station.

Glad you thought the bit with Kendra and Bathilda was intense. In my original NaNo novel, on which this fic is based, Kendra was one of the main characters, but she's not going to have a very large role here. I think, from DH, it was mentioned that Ariana's accident and resulting condition was kept secret because her powers were a threat to the Statute of Secrecy, and she would be confined to St. Mungo's for the rest of her life. So, so far, I'm sticking to canon here! :P

I didn't expect Aberforth to be the first one to meet Grindelwald, either! I honestly thought it would be Albus. But this chapter went and wrote itself, and at the end when I was editing, I decided to swap things around. I'm not sure how this fic is going to pan out yet, but it won't have that many chapters, so I'm going to move through things fairly quickly. Gellert is a bully, baha!

And the Hallows, ah. More about that in the next chapter, which I'm going to have to think about very carefully!

Thank you so much for your lovely review, Kristin! ♥


 Report Review

Review #10, by marauderfanRabbit Heart: Cold Toes, Warm Heart

28th March 2014:

Oh dear, what is happening to Wren? How has she been forgetting things like seeing her friends, and buying film so as to not run out? That rabbit is occupying all of her thoughts and I don't trust it. In fact, I think its true nature is much less like the fluffy and cute bunny she believes it to be, and more like the Killer Rabbit from Monty Python's Holy Grail. That's absolutely what I visualize when Wren keeps wanting to go check on the rabbit. Ok, but WATCH YOUR NECK, WREN!!

Wait no I've figured it out: THE RABBIT IS POSSESSING HER. It's evil I tell you! Evil! Dillon did something to it, and maybe it's not a rabbit at all. Robot in disguise? Alien? A Dark Lord? ... I'm way off the mark.

Aside from my (probably incorrect) theories on the rabbit, I like your characterization of Nellie, sje seems like a great friend! I liked the way you wrote James too. I have a friend who's super into juggling and balancing things on his face, so James dropping forks everywhere made me laugh.

What's going on with Albus? Why is he glowing? Is he secretly Iron Man? (I'm on fire with these really likely guesses today.) I assume it's evil-rabbit-related, but I don't know why it would be...

I have the feeling this chapter is kind of a calm before the storm. All this mystery is swirling around and Wren doesn't question it at all, but I sense that something big is about to happen. Eeep!

Awesome chapter!

Author's Response:
Hi again!

Haha! Killer rabbit from Monty Python was one of my inspirations for Bunny. That's so funny! Yes, Wren needs to watch herself around that rabbit. Who knows what's going to happen next?

Oooh, alien rabbit from planet X that's trying to take over the wizarding world with his creepy andriod boy, Dillon! LOL. Interesting premise.

Nellie is a good friend, and thankfully has kept Wren from being completely isolated over the summer. She tries to get Wren to relax as much as she can, but at the moment, Wren's too much inside her head to be able to do that. And yeah, James putting stuff on his face, lol! I knew someone like that too.

Okay, so we have alien Bunny, android Dillon AND Iron Man Albus... that's a recipe for epic right there! Crossover, anyone? Haha!

I hope you keep reading, and thanks for the lovely review!


 Report Review

Review #11, by marauderfanThe Second Act: Intermission

27th March 2014:

Beautiful chapter!! Seriously this is so good! The emotions and passage of time and attention to detail and gah just everything.

Firstly, the organisation that Teddy set up to help werewolves, called MOONY... that is PERFECT and exactly what I would expect from him.

Victoire's thoughts throughout this were beautiful too, I liked when she was looking at the obituary and how 134 words fails to say everything she feels, and when she was hoping Teddy got to see his parents on the other side. You wrote the progression of her grief really well too, from the way she tought she wouldn't survive, to her family coming to help in any way they could. I loved -LOVED- the section when you described Charlotte's art, how it was her way of dealing with her grief, and it helped Victoire out as well.

It was great when Vic decided to write the book and found her passion for history again, and how it helped her move on. What a perfect way for her to meet Dennis, too!

Aw, their date was cute. I could absolutely see Dennis being the youthful type even when he's old. You've totally got me convinced on this weird ship.

I think the best thing about this chapter was the way you wrote the progression of grief and recovery, and the way she is able to love again. Reallg great job on this chapter 10/10!

Author's Response: Ahhh, thank you so much!! This review made me smile so much, and I'm smiling again while rereading it!

MOONY took SO long to come up with. And the name still doesn't make too much sense. But I'm stubborn.

I'm glad you liked how she met Dennis. I was worried it would seem a little bit forced, but it seems like it's gone over pretty well. Whew!

Yay!!! I totally ship them too. Even though I didn't think I would.

Thank you so much. You're seriously just so sweet. Reading your reviews makes me smile very very very much!!

 Report Review

Review #12, by marauderfanHealing: Prologue: No Words

25th March 2014:
Well, it looks like you haven't updated this one for a while, but it looked interesting. Having just recently written something about post-war George as well I decided to have a look at yours because I have a sneaking suspicion that you dispensed with parts of canon. Fred is listed as a character in this, so I have hope. :p

Ugh, reading about George witnessing this is so raw and heartbreaking and sad. You've portrayed the grief and emotions so well, and it's like reading that part of DH all over again :( and the way you've focused on things like Bill's face "floating" in front of him is such an effective way to portray George's shock and helplessness, like he's seeing everything in the hall through a haze of tears. :'(

BUT WAIT. HE IS TOTALLY ALIVE. Why else would Madam Pomfrey do that? Ha, I knew I could count on you, as someone who denies that Fred's death ever happened. HE'S ALIVE! At least he'd better be. Ahhh!

Awesome start! I'm excited to read more of this. :)

 Report Review

Review #13, by marauderfanThe Second Act: Act One

25th March 2014:
Saw this was for the weird ship challenge and had to read it, haha. I've come to appreciate really odd pairings recently.

"Why do you look like you're in trouble with the Ministry?" Lololol. Also I love that Harry put the ring in the Snitch... because she was playing the Chudley Cannons... this conversation between Harry and Teddy is too good. Love it.

I like the way you pointed out the highlights of Teddy and Victoire's life together. The changing POVs was a nice touch too, with the first person being present-day Victoire getting remarried, and the third person like snapshots of the past.

Ps, I think it's awesome that you wrote a story in which the main character gets remarried. In a fandom where almost every canon character finds their soulmate and one true love by the time they're 18, it's quite refreshing to see something else, where characters can fall in love multiple times. It makes it more realistic.

This is really great, and an original idea - I'll definitely be reading on! Nice job!

Author's Response: I had so much fun with the weird ships. I originally got Umbridge and the assassin Death Eater from PoA. Can't remember his name. I was thinking for a minute about doing some weird star-crossed lovers thing before crawling back to the forums to change.

I'm glad that you understood the flash-backs, and then that she's in the present.

Teddy and Victoire is my headcanon, so when I got my rare ship, I had to make Victoire and Teddy a thing first... I just... I can't disobey headcanon unless it's for a collab or parody...

Thanks so much for the review!

 Report Review

Review #14, by marauderfanOne Blaze of Glory: Reason Says I Should've Died Three Years Ago

25th March 2014:
I saw you updated this ages ago and I've only just had time to get around to reading it! *brings a plate of chocolate chip cookies straight from the oven to apologize for being such a bad reviewer*

Aah, that part about Portia was so sad! I can't imagine how it must have been for her to be that desperate and then tricked into something as horrible as that. The support group is wonderful, though; it must help a lot for them to be able to talk and understand each other. Hopefully one of these times, Marcellus will be able to convince Romulus to go, it'd do him good.

Nadia and Aisling!! :D Aaa so cute. Love it.

How sad for Marietta that they won't publish her article - the fact that she didn't finish school doesn't mean she's not intelligent! I'll bet they didn't even read it! :( At least she has an opportunity to publish it under Marcellus' name though. Good for her. Don't give up, Mariertta!

And yay, Romulus agreed to go to a meeting and actuallly be there, rather than creeping outside the wall. I think it will help him. At least I hope so.

Another awesome chapter! Keep up the great work :)

Author's Response: My last three reviews are from you, so maybe I should respond to them!! (Haha, but really, you're the sweetest!!)

Oh man. I hadn't realised how long it's been since an update!! Chapter six has been done for weeks, I'll have to get around to posting that... Hopefully I'll be posting every two or three weeks until it's completed.


I really wanted to show that even though these are characters that we're meant to like... they still do the bad things that we hear about on the other side. They do kill livestock and occasionally people... they just feel horribly about it.

Don't worry about Marietta. She's way too stubborn to give up. On anything. Ever. Almost to the extent where it's a little annoying.

In the next two chapters, we'll get to see non-angsty Romulus. Nearly... cheery Romulus! Who knew that could happen... ;)

Thanks so much for reading and reviewing. It means so much to me!!

 Report Review

Review #15, by marauderfanThe Safety of the Shadow: Leaving Your Comfort Zone

25th March 2014:
Um, first of all I love that your wrote fanfiction for a school assignment. :D

This is a really beautiful one-shot! The descriptions are so lovely, and the symbolism about the shadows as kind of a retreat of safety and familiarity. I love how it's kind of a trip through her memories as she grew up - this line in particular was lovely: It had seen her laugh and cry, scream, shout, and simply just be.

The part at the end was nice too when she steps out of the shadow and into the sun, letting go of her safety zone and accepting that the ending of her time at Hogwarts is also a new beginning. A literal and figurative step out of shadow. The whole story really conveys this sense of nostalgia and your descriptions are very visual. I like how you highlighted the light and dark, focusing on things like the sun and the forest.

Well done on this fic, you conveyed a lot in a small amount of words, and it was really lovely!

And my favorite Ben & Jerry's flavor is Peach Cobbler - yum. Gah now I really want ice cream.

Author's Response: Haha, is there any other way?

Thank you so much! I'm so glad you liked my descriptions and that I wrote everything effectively. Awe, shucks. You're too sweet. I was really trying to create a visual and mental version of how she was seeing everything.

Thanks again, for reading and reviewing! I really appreciate it.

I've never tried it! I'll have to! Hehe, sorry!

xoxo Sarah

 Report Review

Review #16, by marauderfanLying Josephine: Nice to Meet You

24th March 2014:
Um, I pretty much love the job posting. Every entence ends with an exclamation :p All you need is an abiliy to read and your favourite joke? Can I work there?

The interview is hilarious, I was laughing out loud as I read it! And the way every other question started with "Sooo..." haha. Seriously, why aren't real interviews like this? You write Fred so well, btw. This is exactly how I'd imagine him as the co-leader of a company!

OOH JOSEPHINE SUCH A BOSS. She not only knows all about finances, but she spoke at least six lines of text! Atta girl. Except then George walks in and she has to hide under the desk... oy vey. But seriously the rest of that scene I was laughing so hard, especially at the MOST awkward time, in that silence of "now what" SHE SITS ON THE CHAIR AGAIN AHAHA... I mean, poor girl, it must have been absolutely mortifying, but it's so funny! I hope that, given some time and space away from it, she sees how funny it is too :p

The favourite chest hair... Omg I can't even handle this. I'm dying of laughter.

And then that sad little closing section... well, I guess objectively it wasn't that sad, but it was quite sobering after the comedy of errors that was the interview. Reopening the shop... I can't imagine that went well.

By the way, despite the rollercoaster that is my feelings right now, I like the way this is narrated in segments hopping back and forth in time, it's a neat way to do it, as Josephine kind of reflects on her memories of earlier, better times. Can't wait until the next chapter!

Now you only need 2 more reviews till 100!! :D *confetti*

 Report Review

Review #17, by marauderfanLying Josephine: Promises, Promises

24th March 2014:

I love the first section, Josephine's "conversation" with Fred. If it can even be called that. It was more like Fred's conversation with Jo's inner voice and facial expressions. Btw, I love their friendship! It's great that she doesn't need to be super outgoing to be friends with him, because he understands her mode of speaking through facial expressions and few words - and he loves to talk anyway, this way he has more time to do so without being interrupted haha. It's a sweet friendship. I do wonder how they became friends in the first place! :p

I love that he resorted to blackmail to try to get Jo to tell George about her feelings for him. And when she said she'd get over him, and then her inner voice and Fred both said "that'll be the day"... hilarious. She's a great character - its cool to see someone who is actually very similar to the twins in terms of thought process and humour, but is the opposite in social aspects.

Ahhh the funeral again it's so sad :( And George and Mrs Weasley both crying :( I wish Jo had stayed there for George... it must be hard to be so shy! I'm curious what happened to her family as well. Great chapter!

 Report Review

Review #18, by marauderfanLying Josephine: Introduction: Boxes

24th March 2014:
All right, here's another step closer to 100 ;)

The beginning is intriguing - just enough to raise questions, but certainly doesn't give anything away. Just enough to convey the feeling of guilt. And then back in time a little... Fred's funeral. Gah I get sad just thinking about it. I think you portrayed Josephine's feelings wonderfully though, and captures the post-war mindset of how, yeah it's nice that Voldemort is gone, but so are people's friends and family and that really hits close to home. Poor girl :(

This is really beautifully writtten, ,a great start to your story!

 Report Review

Review #19, by marauderfanGravel on the Ground: From the Ashes: Chapter 8

24th March 2014:
Ok, I love the whole scene of the Weasley family dinner, George's elbow in Ginny's face haha. Aw, poor Sadie, that must be difficult to get any food at a dinner like a shark feeding frenzy, since shecan't speak up. Use your elbows, Sadie! That will get people out of the way :p

I feel bad for George too as he obviously didn't mean to be so tactless, but at least he dug himself out of that hole all right. Blame it on Fred, always a good option. Oh dear, what are the twins up to now...

Aw! I love Sadie's memory of being at home on the farm and happy, I love that they had tractors. Obviously Arthur approves :D Also, I loved the whole feeling of that section describing the kind of old timey farm, it sounds lovely. Especially a Vermont autumn!

Oh no! That's her only memory of wand magic?! I wonder if she'll be able to overcome it, or do without a wand entirely. It sounds like a scary outing for her to Diagon Alley! Hopefully the twins will make it easier for her, haha.

Great chapter, as always! :)

Author's Response: Aw, thank you! I can't tell you how much it means to have you as a reader, and to have you sticking with me. *hugs*

I'm glad you liked the family dinner. I don't suppose they are ALWAYS like that, a shark feeding frenzy, but sometimes it probably can't be helped, especially with that many of them stuck inside from the rain. And yes, Sadie needs to learn to use her elbows. I will tell her that.

Yeah, George didn't mean to put his foot in his mouth, but he's really good at it. His general plan is to always blame it on Fred anyway. As for what they are up to, stay tuned. :) I think you'll like it.

It was really nice to write some happy memories for Sadie, to show that she had a great childhood until it was ripped away from her. And it was fun to make it all old-fashioned and cozy.

Well, it's probably not her only memory of wand magic - of course she remembers her parents using them for good things, but the good memories were overwritten by the many, many bad ones. We'll have to see how she overcomes it.

Thanks again SO much for reading this, and for just being a great friend.

- Farmgirl

 Report Review

Review #20, by marauderfanJames Potter and the Dark Lord's Trail: Chapter 2

23rd March 2014:
The chapters are short so I figured I'd do another one :)

This chapter raises even more questions! Ooh, what has caused Ginny to switch sides? What did she give ole Voldy? How long has that been going on? And something is going on with Hermione and Draco too. Aah! So suspenseful! Sorry this is actually a slightly useless review and more just a list of my questions, but after those two chapters I'm really curious how all this came about. Great chapter!

Author's Response: Thanks for the review :) I'm really glad you liked it and aswell, Those questions are a mystery. NO SPOILERS!

 Report Review

Review #21, by marauderfanJames Potter and the Dark Lord's Trail: Chapter 1

23rd March 2014:
For our review swap!

wow, what an action packed start! Is Voldemort really back, or was that just a very vivid dream? I wonder why he is only appearing to Ginny, and not Harry. It's certainly a very intriguing beginning. I particularly liked the part just as Ginny woke up, it was more descriptive and that added to how real it felt. This is quite an exciting start, well done!

Author's Response: Thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed the description - I tried hard to do it in that opening bit :) hope you enjoy the rest,

 Report Review

Review #22, by marauderfanHarry Potter and the Plot of Power: 02 Cassandra's Gift

23rd March 2014:
Lol at Ron snoring like an angry bear. Ack, it's funny but it's distracing me from the fact that I NEED TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENED and who died in the last chapter!! The suspense is killing me.

ok, I know I shouldn't find this so amusing because I'm about to find out unpleasant news about who died but I love Sir Podmore. Can he be included in every chapter? I love that he finds Harry dull, and that he is kind of a nobody but has a really high opinion of himself and points out that his friends are important knights of the Round Table. Hahaha... ok. I'm getting so sidetracked. I apologise for my attention span.

I love how the Muggle police force works together with the Aurors, that's quite cool. Also, I'm glad Harry made it his personal mission to track down Dolohov, after everything he did. Teddy and Andromeda would certainly have some peace. Also, I'm glad Harry visits Dudley and that they don't hate each other anymore. You are really enjoying making me wait to find out what happened though :p

Nooo! Ahh, I was worried it would be Lorcan, :( I can't believe Lorcan died, and ugh what a ghastly way to go. Poor guy. And Hugo a test subject... this story is so intense gahh! Sorry about my incoherent rambling - anyway this was a great chapter and I am sitting on the edge of my seat waiting for more.

 Report Review

Review #23, by marauderfanHarry Potter and the Plot of Power: 01 For Crown and Country

23rd March 2014:
Eep, I thought I had reviewed this ages ago when I read it! Fail. But anyway. I loved the beginming section with Ron and Hermione. They are adorable together, and Hugo was hilarious :p Hermione does have a point though, they've had a long time of fighting dark wizards, especially since they started at 11! I would imagine that sort of a job ages them a lot.

ooh, this school is really mysterious. Its a nice idea certainly, but suspicious since the Ministry doesn't know about it. What are they actually doing there, when people think they are teaching? Why do they order executions for people? Does this have anything to do with that virus from the prologue? Eeek

THAT BODY HAD BETTER NOT BE HUGO. OR LORCAN. But something tells me it is one of them, given the previous section about people telling and breaking the secrecy. Aaa! Awesome chapter, I'm off to read the next chapter (and hopefully my review for that will be more coherent than this one haha)

 Report Review

Review #24, by marauderfanPurple Houses: One

22nd March 2014:
Hello! I saw your status post and I never see stories about Sybill Trelawney so I had to stop by! :)

I liked this, it was cool how you gave Trelawney a bit of a back story and how she ended up where she did. I don't recall if Trelawney in Ravenclaw is canon but it fits so well, I could definitelg see her being the kind of aloof student who spends her time drawing or else looking at astrological drawings in a corner surrounded by books!

The part about her Nanny was really sweet, and then sad at the end :( But I like that it motivated her to go back to her childhood dream and the kind of innocence of before the war, and maybe loosen up on the Divination a little haha. I hope she did end up getting a purple house! :)

 Report Review

Review #25, by marauderfanMixed-up in Magic: one

21st March 2014:
For our review swap!

Ooh, a murder mystery. I'm sad that Dean was killed though! :( I was expecting it to just be a nameless wizard or at least one I didn't know. So the wizard on the case must be Albus?

I like what you've done with the characters so far, they have clear personalities already. Poor Taryn, having to just get coffee for an unappreciative boss - I'm glad she finally got a bit of recognition and is able to help on a case. And she already found a clue! (though probably doesn't know what it means, but hey it's something.)

I'm really interested in how things will pan out. It doesn't surprise me that Muggles would be called in to investigate a wizard murder, to them its just a murder, but now that Taryn has seen things in the wizarding world... she's sure to ask about the brooms and other probably obvious wizardy things she'll find in the house with more investigation. I wonder how the wizarding side of the case will keep that quiet... anyway, a really intriguing start, and I'm excited to see where it goes! Thanks for the swap!

 Report Review
If this is your story and you wish to respond to reviews, please login

<Previous Page  Jump:     Next Page>