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Reading Reviews From Member: marauderfan
  
1,450 Reviews Found

Review #1, by marauderfanChai, Dancing, and a Friend in the Wee Hours of the Morning: Chai, Dancing, and a Surprise

10th December 2017:
OMG OMG I AM SO EXCITED FOR ANOTHER CHAI STORY YOU HAVE NO IDEA
well maybe you have an idea considering i just swarmed in here with capslock but I AM EXCITED

I absolutely adored this, and it's as magnificent as the rest of the series. This is everything I want from a fluff story. At the risk of sounding like a broken record, your writing of Neville and Hannah is my favourite I've seen anywhere, and the rich detail you put into each of these stories just makes it feel so alive. And, of course, after reading this I am once again very hungry. That gujia they were making sounded delicious. I love that Neville is catching on by this point and has learnt enough from Hannah that he knows what else to get out when he sees that fry pan, haha.

I also love that you chose to set this during Diwali, and Hannah's enthusiasm for this time of year is just infectious! I loved the scene with her dancing in the kitchen and Neville literally just falling in love with her right there. Like you can actually see the hearts in his eyes. I can't say I blame him. I love these two almost as much as they love each other.

Their flirty banter is as fun to read as always. Omg, is it possible for anything to be cuter than this? And then they whisper I love you to each other's backs. Aaaah!

Gryffindork. Ahahaha.

So yeah, I loved this, and I wish I had some of the food they made because it sounds amazing, and this story is amazing, and you are amazing. Thank you for writing another one of these, it totally made my day!

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Review #2, by marauderfanThe Next Great Adventure: Open At The Close

9th December 2017:
Yay I didn't realize there had been an update on this (ages ago) and I'm excited to see it!

This was a really powerful chapter and I honestly loved it. I find it easy to believe that Snape would be stuck there forever unable to get out because he can't let go of Lily, and most of all because he can't forgive himself for what happened to her. After all, he pined over her while she was alive and then like 16 more years pining after she was dead, and hated James who was also dead for something that happened when the were teenagers - he's not a man who lets go of anything, and grudges last a lifetime with him, including grudges against himself. I almost felt bad for him. Almost.

But I do think you wrote him very, very well. He hasn't changed at all, which is to be expected from a character like him. He still lashes out at Harry when Harry's just being helpful, because that's Snape's MO. But at this point he's been there so long and is so desperate, that he's willing to do anything, even listen to Harry, in order to get out. I notice he doesn't thank Harry. But he does listen to him and Dobby, and he forgives himself, and that's huge. And good for Dobby for suggesting those ideas in the first place. Dobby really is such a hero.

This was a wonderful chapter. And I'm glad Snape got to find out that Albus Severus is named after him! (Kinda wonder what he'd think about that, tbh) Great writing, as always! ♥

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Review #3, by marauderfanTraitorous Hearts: A Family Affair

5th December 2017:
Hi Penny! I'm so glad to be back reading this story again, I have missed it! I started reading this chapter for the snowball fight, then I realized the snowball fight was over. Whoops. I'm still really excited to read this chapter though. :P

Aw. While Filly's 'dress' of doilies and part of a baby blanket sounds like an odd-looking creation, it is so sweet that they went to the effort of making her something that's as close as it can to be clothes without actually being clothes. It kinda seems like Lavinia Greengrass mostly cared about the appearance of how the house elves' clothng reflects on the house, but at least for young Astoria it kinda seems like she just liked doing that, and I find it sweet :)

Poor Astoria. she must have a lot to deal with on days when her father isn't lucid. I'm annoyed at Daphne not being around to help after promising she would be :(

That library sounds AMAZING though. I can almost not blame Felix for spending all of his waking hours in there. And he loves Shakespeare! His defense of Shakespeare and other Muggle authors was really interesting to read as well, how he thinks there is some value in Muggle art even if he doesn't see the point in mingling with Muggles.

Astoria's great grandmother sounds really cool. But also like she would have a legacy that's hard to live up to. I enjoyed that scene with Astoria telling Filly to hide the books while the portrait of her great-grandmother looked on and approved quietly, it just felt so subversive and great :D

her voice barely more than a dry leaf trembling, clinging to a twig in the midst of a cold, strong wind. -- I love this description. This is so beautiful and effective.

That was a really powerful scene between Draco and Narcissa after Harry escaped from Malfoy Manor. And it's really consistent to the Narcissa we see at the end of DH doing anything she can to protect Draco, and has kind of lost her desire to have anything to do with the war.

Great chapter! I really love this story.

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Review #4, by marauderfanSurvival of the Fittest: It's too early for a love triangle

2nd December 2017:
Hello! Long time no see! I'm excited to get back to this story.

I love this scene with Al and Riya talking/cuddling. It's just so nice to see that things can be normal once in a while, and how Riya is able to appreciate what she has so much that she feels like this is comfort. Of course, it also marks a pretty big difference in what Albus has gone through - not to discredit what I'm sure has also been a really hard time for Al, but... it was just harder for Riya being totally out there on her own with Theo and pine needle tea.

Wow I was FURIOUS with Theo for calling Riya that - he jumped to a conclusion awfully fast and he has no business calling her that. I'm glad Riya was having none of that and stood up for herself and put Theo in his place. I do kinda feel for Theo having a crush on Riya for years and I can understand why he'd be upset seeing what he thinks is Riya falling in love with Al instantly, but... there's no need for name calling and shaming, he was totally in the wrong and I was cheering Riya on as she went off at him. But despite them arguing I was really glad they made up afterwards and that they know things will be okay. I think especially in their situation it's so important to stick together as they're such a ragtag group being pursued through the forest. They'll need each other.

Ok but this line, after most of the yelling has happened: I gazed a moment at the dark eyelashes of the sleeping boy. Hed laugh when he hears about this fight, no doubt. --- HOW DOES SHE STILL THINK AL IS SLEEPING hahahahaha. Not surprised he was in fact, not sleeping.

I like that they're doing plant ID in the woods, this is something I feel in my soul. #fieldbiologist

That scene with the goblin was so intense. I was on the edge of my seat hoping no one would move or anything - Harry did walk out of the tent whistling, but I guess he caught himself in time? But that was such a high stress scene and I'm glad they weren't found. *Wipes forehead*

This was a great chapter! I'm glad to have found my way back to this story again :)

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Review #5, by marauderfanLet Not the Silence Break: Let Not the Silence Break

2nd December 2017:
For the HPFT winter wonderland fort building! (Family theme)

Okay. So based on the summary and the banner I've got a big box of tissues right next to me just in case. I'm hoping the AU tag on this means you're bringing Fred back to life but I can never tell. Anyway, here goes.

First of all, wow. This was... not what I expected. I don't know what I expected but it wasn't this. How did they get there? Why is someone doing this to the twins? How could you be so mean to them as the author?? That aside - this is an incredibly powerful story. It just grabbed me in and I was emotionally invested in it immediately. The way you tell this story in silence is truly incredible. Every emotion and silent struggle and trauma they go through is just magnified by the other twin and by the fact that they are suffering in silence, and how each one is putting himself at greater risk just to make things easier for the other one in whatever way they can. What a horrible thing to have to go through, to watch your twin die.

And when have they ever needed words-- This is very true. They understand each other without words. But at the same time - when do they ever not use words? I can't imagine them without words. I know they don't need them, but their wit and jokes and everything is such an essential part of who they are. It's cruel to do this to them, you know?!

He might survive, but he won't live. -- OUCH

And in the end - well, what I think happened, Fred kind of lost some of who he was with this explosion of magic older than time, but he didn't die and neither did George. And in exchange for George's life, the silence is permanent. They are not who they were before, but they are both alive. It's honestly such an interesting ending, and with a story this powerful and emotional and with so much depth of feeling, the explosive and somewhat ambiguous end feels quite fitting. It's perfect.

You're right, this is absolutely the darkest thing I've read by you. But it's also an amazing piece of writing. Your writing style here is enviable, each sentence so profoundly crafted. How do you write so well?!?!?! This is an amazing piece and you should be proud of it.

AND I NEED TO READ A FLUFFY STORY ABOUT DOGS NOW. Or kittens. Or rainbows. Gah. But honestly this was amazing

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Review #6, by marauderfanAll the truth about Jimmy Portman: Theories and apologies

1st December 2017:
For the HPFT winter wonderland snow fort (friendship fics) #2

Oh wow that was such an intense christmas dinner. I really felt so bad for the Potters because Jimmy was kind of obliviously way over the line there. I don't blame Jimmy for being curious and having suspicions but there is a time and a place and... that was not it. *headdesk*

Dorea is quite the eavesdropper. She's picked up on a lot of information she probably isn't supposed to know! If she knows that Peter kidnapped Harry on his own terms and not Voldemort's orders, that means James and Lily must know that too. Which doesn't excuse what he did, but it must be better for James and Lily knowing that it was done to protect him? Of course, they still have the right to be angry about Peter not returning Harry afterward.

I really liked that last scene with Peter and his Mum because it puts everything into perspective a bit. Of course, he did have a choice in the end on whether to become a Death Eater or not, but this kind of puts into context what he had to go through and why he made the choice he did.

So yeah, things have gotten very interesting. I do hope Peter tells Jimmy the truth sometime soon because Jimmy knows too much now and it's just hurting them both to continue lying. Continuing as they are will just create more problems later on.

Great chapter!!! ♥

Author's Response: As I said, tactfulness is not Jimmy's biggest quality... poor Potters, that was really hard for them... :(

Yes, she is quite the eavesdropper... and yes, James and Lily know that Peter had "good" intentions, but that doesn't excuse his actions.

I'm so glad you liked the scene with Mary and that it helped putting things into perspective a bit. Peter did go through a lot and I think it's important to remember that.

Peter should totally tell Jimmy at this point, but it will probably take some more time... but yes, going on like this will only hurt them both... :(

Thank you so much for another lovely review!


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Review #7, by marauderfanAll the truth about Jimmy Portman: Christmas

1st December 2017:
Reviewing as part of the fort building for the snowball fight! (friendship theme) I'm very glad to come back to this story!




Also how timely and perfect that this chapter is called Christmas.




I love that Lily makes the wolfsbane potion for Remus. And that she owns an apothecary - it's nice to imagine that this is what she'd be doing if she had lived. It fits too, because we know she was so good at potions. And it's just like Remus to refuse a gift because he feels bad about his financial situation. I think you got the dynamic of his self-deprecating, sort of "I don't deserve nice things" behaviour perfectly, as well as Lily's generosity. I'm glad she forced him to accept the gift.




Mary is still alive!!




You've written all the Weasley siblings SO perfectly. I really enjoyed that scene. It's nice that Ron has somewhere to stay over the holiday that doesn't involve him just being alone as the rest of his dormmates went home!




It's nice that Peter tried to make Jimmy's new room as similar to the old one as he could to make it feel like home from the start.





I love that Mrs Weasley sent the classic Weasley jumper to him via owl to Peter's house and that she sent Jimmy one too! Also, Neville's gift is awesome.




Dorea is the cutest.




Omg, Mary's girlfriend is a Muggle... is this her first time seeing wizarding photographs? Haha, she's in for a surprise as it doesn't seem Lily and James hid anything wizardy about the house, it's all in the open. And she's talking about politics with Lily at Christmas dinner. Hahahaha. What an introduction XD




Wow so Christmas dinner just got a bit more awkward. Not the time to ask that, Jimmy. ! But. a fantastic end to the chapter as things have just changed a lot! THINGS ARE GOING TO GET EXCITING

Author's Response: Yes! Christmas chapter! Aren't those lovely? ;)

I had been wondering what Lily's job could be... I couldn't imagine her just being a housewife because it just wouldn't work with how I imagine her character. I've seen her as a Healer in some fics, but I didn't really like that either. I'm glad you liked the idea of her owning an apothecary, I did think it worked really well with her talent for Potions. :) And yes, Remus woud try to refuse her gift... it's just how he is, isn't it?

Yes, Mary is alive. :)

Ah, I'm so glad you thought I wrote the Weasleys well, I was a bit worried about it to be honest... and yes, Ron won't have to stay alone at Hogwarts for the holidays. :)

I'm happy you liked that, Peter does care a lot for Jimmy. And I'm happy you liked the Weasley jumpers, too. :)

Aww, so happy you found her cute!

Mary's girlfriend is a last minute addiction (she wasn't there before the editing), but I do love her! Yes, she hadn't seen wizarding photographs before! :P I'm glad you liked her introduction! :)

No, that wasn't the right moment, but it's Jimmy we are talking about, he isn't a champion of tactfulness... glad you are excited, though!


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Review #8, by marauderfanAll the truth about Jimmy Portman: Auror James Potter

29th November 2017:
HERE I AM TO READ AND LOVE THIS CHAPTER. It's been way too long since I've caught up with Jimmy! I'm very glad to be back :) This is for round 2 of the review swap in the CR.

James is back at Hogwarts and he's totally going to see Harry. I mean Jimmy. Will they recognise each other?!?! I'm still surprised James hasn't put together the fact that Peter Portman is Peter Pettigrew. But he has to recognise his son. right?

I am no fan of Snape, but I can kind of side with him here. I mean, he's literally in the middle of teaching a class and James waltzes in there and wants to talk to him this very second. It's a bit entitled of him :P Like, he can't wait ten minutes or something for Snape to have a chance?

I do like that James is trying to extend the olive branch to Snape and put their teenage rivalry behind them. Even if it's only prompted by him wanting something from Snape and that's what prompts him. But, at least it's something. He clearly still doesn't like Snape but he's trying to be civil (well... for the most part). I'm not surprised Snape wants no part of it though. :P

Ok, so now I'm beginning to think that Jimmy and Peter both have a charm to alter their appearance because Harry is said to look similar to James, and here James still doesn't notice anything... I mean, he can't be that thick. So, there's an appearance charm. (You may have already mentioned this in an earlier chapter but if you did, I forgot :P)

"And the only one I remember ever attempting murder at Hogwarts it's you." - WOW YEP THIS IS A SOLID POINT. And James may not like Snape at all but it's nice that he does trust him, based on the fact that people he trusts also trust Snape.

So Jimmy is starting to put some pieces together. Oooh, and I love that this question of Jimmy looking like Peter, which I was wondering about earlier in this review, is something you've addressed at the end of the chapter. Hermione has figured it out. I think their appearance was changed. Jimmy is going to find out that the appearance he's always seen in the mirror is not actually what he looks like. That'll be a weird experience. I can't wait to find out what Hermione has discovered and how this all turns out!

Great chapter!!

Author's Response: Kristin! So glad to have you back here! :)
Also, it's so nice of you to leave reviews for everyone for the second round of the review swap, you are so wonderful! *hug*
Ahahah! No, they won't recognize each other... not yet... but they are totally meeting and things are going to become complicated, as you already know... :P
It is a bit entitled of James, but what would you expect from him, especially when dealing with Snape? :P But yeah, I can see what you mean...
I think James is actually sorry for the way he treated Snape in school days, but yes, he would have probably never apologized if he didn't need Snape's help. I don't think Snape will ever accept it and I'm quite sure they'll never be friends, but maybe they'll come to respect each other at some point? (I'm asking because I don't know)
Yes, there is an appearence charm. I don't remember if I mentioned it explicitly before, but I have definitely hinted at it in some points. Anyway, yes.
Glad you liked that line in particular. I think there is a part of James that never really forgave Sirius for the Willow incident. And yes, James would trust Snape if both Lily and Dumbledore believe in him.
Yes, Jimmy is starting to put the pieces together and he's going to find out much more than he hoped to (but you already know...)
Thank you so much for the lovely review!


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Review #9, by marauderfanSaving Severus Snape : xxviii.

13th October 2017:
LOOK HI I CAUGHT UP!! Sorry about not leaving reviews on all the chapters in between. Got swept up in the story (and... was also too lazy to type). You know how it goes. Anyway, here we are.

As much as it pained her, she would have to let things unfold, no matter how horrible they would become. -- this is such a sobering thought. like it's scary enough going to the past and being hyper-aware of everything you do and the potential impact it might have, but when you add that to the fact that you have to watch history unfold as you know it, the horrible events and all, that's got to be so excruciating. And Hermione's a person who always reacts to situations she doesn't like by actively doing something to change it. Fighting voldemort, starting SPEW, etc, so this must be especially hard for her to just sit on her hands and do nothing.

The fluff with Severus in the past few chapters has been really sweet. There's a sentence I never thought I'd say. But it's remarkable how much he's changed and how open he is with her, it's so sweet.

Great chapter!

Also I am so, so sorry to hear about your aunt. It's so hard to watch loved ones go through cancer treatments. I sincerely hope things get better. ♥ my inbox(es) are always open if you ever want to talk.

Great work on this chapter and you are a lovely person ♥

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Review #10, by marauderfanSaving Severus Snape : xxii.

12th October 2017:
It's probably best that you get presents for your families, before you spend all of your money on sugar, she told them. -- I would expect nothing less from someone whose parents are dentists. XD

It was lovely to se Hermione spending time with her Ravenclaw friends again. Though I wonder how much Amelia has guessed. Still, it's unlikely that a) Remus and Amelia talk that much about Hermione, or that b) Amelia is going to suspect the truth, because the truth is pretty weird.

Maybe she will though. When my friends are acting weird I tend to first suspect them of being time-travellers from the future because duh, what else could it be?

I love that you're not afraid to show the ugly side of Lily. I think it's easy for writers to fall into the trap of writing her as this flawlessly nice person, but no one is that nice. (I'm a Hufflepuff and even I'm not that nice. :P) So I like that you show this other side to her because it makes her more human.

Severus really has no reason to be cold with Hermione, did he not hear that she was standing up for him? But Hermione's right, Severus does make a big deal out of nothing quite often. Poor Hermione though, that kind of situation sucks because she did nothing wrong but feels guilty all the same.

Awesome chapter! (I wanted to leave you a review for finishing your chapter but I'm still too far behind and not there yet :P )

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Review #11, by marauderfanSaving Severus Snape : xx.

9th September 2017:
For HPFT MAGIC M10: Review a story about a Slytherin (Severus Snape)

I was really hoping to find time to get back to this story I love, and to contribute to Hufflepuff totally dominating in the House Cup before I have to start my drive across the country in half an hour, so luckily I found a way to do both at the same time :P

Also did I ever congratulate you for winning like a million awards for this story? They just seem to keep piling up every time I click on the story! :P Well done, it's totally deserved.

when suddenly she froze. Severus would use his gift. For many years, actually. -- EEE OMG did she just remember seeing it in the classroom in the future when she was a student?!?! *rubs hands with glee* Ahahaha this is perfect

For whatever reason, he always kept her waiting whenever she had a question and would raise her hand in the middle of class.
Hermione locked her eyes onto him, and sat up straight, refusing to lower her arm until he called on her. Why did he hate her so much?
-- Yes! This is something I've wondered since partway through this story, why Severus was still so mean to her after all this when she was a student and I'm glad you've addressed that in Hermione's thoughts because it means there's an answer on its way. Literally everytime I find a hole that I can use as a reason for my Snamione skepticism, you address it a couple of chapters later and fix/explain it. Seriously, this story is so well thought through and I really admire that. You address all the details in a way that could make even the most skeptical-of-Snamione reader kinda fall for this ship a little, or at least understand it.

The scene where he actually hands her the stirring stick is so perfect. Like, it's clear there's not just hatred going on in his head, and he displays a second of emotion behind his usual mask... and despite his obvious attachment to the stirring stick and who gave it to him, he still takes points away from Gryffindor. Because he's Snape and that's what he does. You've added a whole new layer to him while still keeping him very recognizably Snape.

AND HE KNOWS without a doubt that she's the same person. How could he not?

But, he remembers whereas it hasn't happened for her yet... and in 1976, she remembers but he doesn't know yet that he'll see her in the future. AHHH

Ooo things are heating up! I mean, I kinda saw it coming when Hermione started lighting candles and conjuring pillows in this room that just the two of them were using for a "duel" :P But I think Hermione's reaction to how fast they were moving really fits with her character and even though she's acting differently here and we're seeing her in a different context than we've seen Hermione before, she still feels like the same person.

Severus including Hermione in his dreams for the future, aww. That's so bittersweet, because it's really lovely to think that he was once so hopeful and happy, and then to realize that it will never happen because eventually (somehow?) Hermione has to go back to her own time.

I didn't think it was filler! I thought it was great! Wonderful chapter :)

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Review #12, by marauderfanLying Josephine: This Is For

4th September 2017:
TANYA OMG OMG OMG DO MINE EYES DECEIVE ME OR IS THIS AN ACTUAL NEW CHAPTER I LOVE YOU SO MUCH

THIS JUST MADE MY DAY, NO WAIT MY ENTIRE WEEK

I HAVE SO MANY FEELINGS THAT I CAN ONLY EMOTE IN CAPSLOCK

But that'd be kinda annoying if I did this entire review in capslock, so I'll try to restrain myself.

George is on his way in next, and as much as I'm sure you'd love for him to land on top of you, this is simply neither the time nor place." -- HA. this is during a sad scene in a dusty boarded up Weasley's Wizard Wheezes and the battle of Hogwarts is going on and FRED IS MAKING JOKES LIKE THIS. Bahahaah I just don't know how to handle it.

This whole section really. I absolutely love your use of detail. I can picture the whole scene so clearly. And love, love, love the scene with Jo and Fred right before he goes back into the battle. This scene kind of encapsulates everything about their relationship. He's still managing to bring joy at a dark time and lift Jo's spirits, and he's all talk and she's all silence, and she silently keeps him from getting too cocky. I mean, if she hadn't moved, that spell could have been bad :P And when he kisses her forehead at the end. Gah, these two are so adorable and I love their friendship SO. MUCH.

I love your description of the Burrow and all the sights and smells that make it the home that it is. ♥ Also I am now very hungry.

"I'm scared," I tell my shoelaces. I know she's talking to her shoelaces here rather than the person who asked her a question, but she TALKED. This is huge character development right here.

The way Josephine is welcomed with so much love into the family kind of makes my heart explode with feels. and hugs me like I matter. -- GUH. Is someone cutting onions in here?

Percy actually reaches out to shake my hand, and while he gives a polite smile, it doesn't quite meet his eyes. I can't help but feel shaken by his obvious skepticism. -- honestly I really loved this line because it's perfect. I can totally imagine Percy's smile doesn't reach his eyes, but that it's because he likely is still haunted by the guilt that he was there distracting Fred with his first ever joke when Fred was hit with the curse. (or at least that's how he sees it). I want to tell Jo it's nothing personal.

Mr. Weasley simply grins. "I have one word for you all," he announces above the giggling, eyeing each of his sons with a pointed look. "Genetics."
And that shuts them all up.
-- If they'd had a science class at Hogwarts, Charlie could tell his father that male baldness is actually inherited through the mother. So there, Arthur. But they didn't, so Arthur wins this round. Bahaha, this whole conversation was so entertaining though. Can I just say how PERFECTLY you write the Weasleys? Not just Fred and George, because everyone already knew that you're amazing at writing them, but the whole family. This could be a scene from the books. They are all exactly what I'd expect from them in this situation. Their mannerisms, their exact type of humor - everything is PERFECT. I love the way George elaborated on Molly's threat about the lawnmower when he told Arthur. Leaving him for Hagrid... I'm dying of laughter XD

Josephine did a really good job holding it together surrounded by all those people asking her questions, I know she's miles outside of her comfort zone, but she does so well. And the fact that she was able to be totally honest about some things (like the story about Fred) really makes it believable. And oh, I think it's raining on my face.

I'm just as sad as Josephine is about the idea of her not being able to spend time with the Weasleys again. That would crush me. Just, it's so good for all of them - for Josephine, for George, for all of the Weasleys, for them to have her around. I know it's all based on a lie, but it's bringing Josephine out of her shell and helping her deal with her grief, and the Weasleys get to relive all their favorite moments with Fred all over again and know that Fred was loved, and it's just so healing for all of them. Which will ultimately make it harder as more time passes, I know, and Jo realizes how stuck she is in her lie, but honestly they need this. Grief is so much easier when shared.

I'm running out of characters, and this is so long that you must be already dreading having to respond to it, but I just wanted to say how beautiful this chapter was and you have no need to doubt yourself on your writing, or on your incredible portrayal of the Weasleys or Harry. They are all perfect, so is this story, and so are you.



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Review #13, by marauderfanAll the truth about Jimmy Portman: Quidditch, curses and family affairs

4th September 2017:
*pounces*

WELL HELLO THERE

"Hermione! It's Quidditch!" the two boys cried in unison, -- I love this. For all their bickering, they have the same reaction when Hermione tries to stop them. :P I think they'd get on quite well if they gave each other a chance!

Thank goodness Jimmy was fast enough to see Neville tumble over the rail and actually go catch him before he hit the ground!

DUMBLEDORE KNOWS. Of course Dumbledore knows. And... he's not doing anything about it. He knows where Harry has been all these years and who kidnapped him and... ugh, this is very typical of Dumbledore to know all this information and not tell anyone until it suits his purposes :P but... would it even be fair for him to tell James and Lily at least? Considering he may not know the reasons? I don't know, this is such an ethical dilemma :P

And I was glad Peter and Jimmy actually talked and that Jimmy let go of his anger. Love is important, and he has a family who loves him, but... love can't cover up lies. Honestly I can't blame Jimmy. I'd be full of questions too if I were him and I wouldn't like knowing that the answer is there but out of reach. Peter needs to tell him the truth, and soon. And yet, as much as I'm annoyed with Peter's choice of action here... it's very in character for him :P I bet he's just hoping Jimmy will forget so Peter never has to face up to what he's done and face Jimmy's disapproval about it.

Hehe, I still really enjoy it when people are like "WOW NEVILLE LONGBOTTOM??" with some degree of starstruck-ness :P


CC if you want it/Because English is weird:

I saw 'misterious'/'mistery' in there a couple of times, which is what you'd expect the translation to be as a cognate, but it's actually spelt with a Y: mysterious/mystery

All he received from his friends were clueless, pitiful glares -- Hm. I think you may have meant 'glances', not glares? a glare is generally an angry look (or a bright light)

This was a lovely chapter, Chiara! I'm really enjoying this fic!

Author's Response: Ahahah! Typical Hermione, reading at a Quidditch match. Yes, Neville and Ron could get along if they just tried.

And yes, thank Merlin Jimmy noticed. He does have a bit of a rescuing mania... Harry is always Harry, right? ;)

I'm not sure if Dumbledore knows... it's more like he suspects, I think. And yes, that's very typical of him, not doing anything and waiting for things to develop...

They did talk. But yes, there are still so many unanswered questions and Peter will need to tell him the truth, sooner or later. I'm glad you found Peter's actions in character, he does hate that kind of confrontation...

Ahahah! I'm so glad you like it! Poor Neville, though...

So glad you enjoyed this chapter too, and I can't wait to know what you think of the rest!

Love and snowball hug,
Chiara


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Review #14, by marauderfanAll the truth about Jimmy Portman: The golden quartet

2nd September 2017:
Ah, I'll have to wait a bit longer to find out what happened with James and Peter back in Godric's Hollow. For now, we're back at Hogwarts!

I like the way you write the changes in friendship dynamics here. Ron has to learn how to play well with others - seems there's a lot of people he doesn't like at this point. But maybe by the end he's gotten a bit better. After all, fighting a gigantic troll can bring anyone together. I like that there's a golden quartet!

It's interesting how many things are quite similar to the original books but with a few small changes, and I feel like as the story goes on, these small changes will build on each other until things are quite different. The friendship dynamics between Jimmy and his classmates are the biggest change so far (well... aside from everything going on away from Hogwarts with PEter), especially with Neville in Slytherin.

And why is Neville being stalked? What has Samantha Rosier against him? :-O It's no wonder he spends all his time with the Gryffindors since his own housemates make him so uncomfortable. :(

english notes:
"If I don't have an infarct in the next five minutes, -- it's generally called a heart attack ;)

Awesome chapter!

Author's Response: Yes, I'm trying to follow both the kids and the adults and to alternate the POVs. Sorry for making you wait.

Ahahah! Yes, my children fight a lot... but they do love each other, or at least they are trying to learn. Yes, I do love this golden quartet! :)

I'm trying to balance things that are similar with things that should be different. It's not easy but I hope it works. I'm glad you like their friendship dynamics.

There's more to come about Samantha, but she doesn't have bad intentions, she's actually just looking for a friend (*cough* she might have a little crush on Neville *cough*) But yes, Neville doesn't really feel comfortable with his housemates and that's no wonder... :P

Thank you for another lovely review! :)


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Review #15, by marauderfanAll the truth about Jimmy Portman: A new neighbour

2nd September 2017:
I kinda feel bad for Peter, having no idea why Jimmy won't talk to him and really trying, despite whatever else he may have done in the past. I feel like it's extra complicated because he did the wrong thing but for the right reasons (mostly). Like, he had no right to run off with Harry like that, but at least Harry is still alive. Jimmy, just answer those letters! But, maybe this is a conversation best held face to face...

a wizard who offered himself as a dragon-sitter -- I know this is really inconsequential but I love it. this is exactly the sort of weirdness I expect from the wizarding world. does this guy get a lot of work? is his only customer Hagrid? /tangent

I'm not really sure Peter has planned this out. like, he may have put some sort of spell on himself so he's not immediately recognizable (plus ten years that Lily hasn't seen him) but... the minute Lily sees Harry *cough* I mean Jimmy... she's going to know. There is no way she won't recognize someone who looks exactly like James and has her own eyes. *CUE MUCH DRAMA*

James was in the kitchen, helping Lily with the dishes. Or better said, he leaned beside the sink, admiring her while she do the cleaning up. -- James you lazy git, do some dishes. :P Ooh, and this just got really exciting because everything surrounding the Philosopher's Stone is still happening, it'll just be different with the Potters alive and I'm so curious to see where you go with this!!!

Heh heh so Peter is moving into a haunted house (or so the locals say). Should be exciting. But really, I'm just looking forward to this meeting happening (James and Peter) because many things are about to change. Peter has a lot of explaining to do and I wonder if his old friends will ever trust him again.

small fixes:
Peter scanned the various adds -- rather than 'adds' as in the maths verb, I think you're looking for 'ads' as in, short for 'advertisements'

You've been a foul to come back.
No. He hadn't been a foul.
-- 'fool' instead of foul

This is a great chapter! And actually I'm so invested in this future meeting where the Potters meet Peter again that I'm going on to the next chapter right away ;)

Author's Response: Hi, Kristin! *hug* *wub*

Sorry for the absurdely long time I took to answer these reviews... I'm the worst...

Yes, I know, poor Peter... he has a lot to be forgiven for, but Jimmy is being quite unfair to him not answering his letters. But yes, that's definitely a conversation they should have in person.

Ahahah! Yes, I wanted to put in some crazy stuff, I'm glad you liked it. No, I don't think he has many customers... :P

Peter didn't think it through so well, but he isn't that unprepared (don't know if this is the right word...) either. More about this will be explained better later. But drama is definitely coming, that I can assure you. :P

Ahahah! Isn't it so very James Potter, though? (that's a detail I added while editing and I love it...) Yes, everything about the Philosopher's Stone is still happening, we'll see where it goes together, hopefully.

I don't think the house is actually haunted, but Peter has a talent for getting himself into trouble... Peter and James will meet soon. What will happen once James discovers the truth, well... we'll see...

Thank you so much, your reviews are always so lovely! You are the best!


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Review #16, by marauderfanTraitorous Hearts: A Changing Tide

4th August 2017:
Wow this was an eventful chapter. Ah! I really loved all the twists and turns in to the plot - Draco finding out, the faceoff between the two of them whre Astoria has let go of any facade of propriety, the terryfing moment when Greyback walks in, and then Draco calling off Greyback, denying everything and leaving. I think Draco is just as scared of Greyback as Astoria is, and whatever else he's done at this point in the war, he's still a kid and not up to facing the idea of watching Greyback devour someone. Besides, as Astoria mentioned, Draco does still have a soul somewhere in there and she found a way to get through to it - she noticed his hesitation at all the crucial moments and banked on it. I have to say, she held her own really well up until the Legilimency, and even afterward when she was defensive - she was not going down without a fight. This was such a fast paced chapter and I couldn't look away for a second as I was reading it! This story is really starting to build up now and I love it.

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Review #17, by marauderfanTraitorous Hearts: The Malediction Perfidious

4th August 2017:
Hi Penny! I just randomly decided to return to this story today as I saw it on the recently updated page and I remembered reading some of it a while ago and really liking it. Now that I'm further into the story I'm loving it even more!

There are far too few stories about Slytherins during the second war, so I really appreciate that about this story - that it handles all the complicated layers of what it is to be a Slytherin during this time, and how much acting is needed and secret alliances and holding all her cards close to her chest. And while Astoria is kind of alone among her peers in that she's working against Voldemort, in a way she's still like any other Slytherin, looking out for herself and those she cares about. It's a wonderful characterisation of her and quite layered which I really appreciate.

I also love her friendship with Ginny - if it can be called that. How they're both incredibly similar - observant, direct with one another (for the most part), and it made me wonder if in different circumstances, like if Ginny wasn't from a 'blood traitor' family or Astoria didn't have judgemental peers - they could have been really good friends. Omg, though, I really love Astoria's musings about Gryffindors' flair for the dramatic and foolish. I love that Ginny's friends got in on this even to the point of faking an injury just so Ginny can secretly meet with Astoria. That was a brilliant scene.

Also yikes that the curse was cast by Astoria's mother. Adds a whole new layer of complication there.

This is such a great story and I'm so glad I've come back to it!

Author's Response: Hey! Aw, yay! I'm so excited that you decided to check it out again, and even MORE excited that you're enjoying it! :D

I feel like your entire 2nd paragraph in this review makes me want to cry tears of happiness because it was *exactly* what I was going for with this story. Astoria is totally a Slytherin, but she's actually a rather good person at her core who, till now, was raised to sort of see her desire to take a stand as a weakness rather than a strength. I really wanted a character who wasn't good in, like, the typical shining, heroic way, but who generally has a good moral compass and who, when left to her own devices, tends to choose the right thing.

I also love her friendship with Ginny! I think it can be called that, even if it's a bit tentative. They're fun because I feel like they kind of represent Gryffindor and Slytherin being two sides of the same coin. They both do have that direct quality, and a certain disregard for the rules. And, to be fair, some prejudices on both sides. I think you're right and if they could have met before, under different circumstances, they would have been great friends all through school. Bahaha, Astoria is a bit of a snob sometimes, but she also sometimes may not be wrong--I think the flair for drama is a part of many Gryffindors. Astoria just maybe isn't aware that Draco Malfoy used to stage his meetings with Harry by sitting around in trees and waiting for him to walk by, and all that ;'). Two sides, same coin.

Thank you so much for this absolutely lovely review1. It's an absolute delight to hear your thoughts! Thank you!

--Penny


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Review #18, by marauderfanTetraphobia: Chapter Two

2nd August 2017:
When I first reviewed this I think it was a one-shot so I'm stoked to see there is a second chapter!


Oh my goodness though, you did it again! Another cliff hanger! :P Seriously though, I read through this so fast because it is really that gripping. I couldn't look away.


This was another great chapter, and unlike the first chapter where it was really uncertain whether everything was in Hermione's head or it was real, in this chapter there's clearly something, and it's real. I'm really curious about the italic sections, as well, particularly the second one. Flashback? A dream?


I'm glad Hermione seems to be trying to face her fears here, but I feel so bad every time she makes progress and then sees this thing again. Based on the fact that it talks at the end and calls her a mudblood, I wonder if it's some residual thing left over from the scar Bellatrix gave her, like a continuing curse. That's some dark magic.


You also have some really wonderful imagery in here - I loved the chilling visual of the dark clouds 'kidnapping the sun' - that's such a perfect descriptor and fits in with the tone of the story so well.


Great chapter - and I'm anxiously awaiting chapter 3!

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Review #19, by marauderfanIn Confidence: In Confidence

22nd July 2017:
It's Renee Appreciation Month, so I'm here to appreciate you in the form of reviews on your amazing writing.

I loved the Potter family breakfast - everything from the way they interact with one another, to the mental image of James with a pancake stuck to his face (which he deserved), to Harry trying to help his sons out with pepperup potion to ease the hangover, haha. And Ginny knowing exactly what was going on (about the hangover, and about Albus. She knows everything!)

And I loved Albus and Rose's conversation and how they confide in each other about their inferiority complexes - they were both so relatable there, and I love how you told it from both perspectives, showing how even when someone thinks they're blah or uninteresting or ugly, others don't see that about them, and we are our own worst critics. So I thought it was really important to include how each of them was surprised to hear the insecurities of the other because the things that each of them perceive about themselves are purely in their head. That's kind of a comforting thought, honestly. Anyway, the relationship and confidence between the two of them is so lovely.

Great story!

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Review #20, by marauderfanInvisible Horses: First Year

22nd July 2017:
okay so I guess this is kind of a backwards transfer, but I figured I may as well copy this one here as well since I was transferring reviews :P


MY DEAR RENEE ♥ I hope you are having a wonderful Winter Solstice today.

Ah! I love this ship! Never in 1000 years would have thought of it on my own, so thank you for drawing my attention to this idea and I can TOTALLY see it. I LOVE THIS. They both are very weird people, and in this story it's such a compatible weirdness and they are just the cutest. I think what makes it work so well is they're already established in canon as being very passionate about the particular things that are important to them - Colin about photography, and Luna about... well, belief I guess, and magical creatures. Although they are interested in such different topics, I think there's a lot of compatibility there in terms of personality and I'm so glad you're exploring that with this story. Even something as small as the fact that they both kick off their shoes for the train ride and they both just kind of accept one another's weirdness right from the beginning. Aw. I can't wait to read more.

As always, your writing is beautiful. That last paragraph is such a gorgeous image!

Sorry this is a short review but I'm about to be late for work :P

Happy Hanukkah!

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Review #21, by marauderfanSaving Severus Snape : xix.

25th June 2017:
Wow. So, the part where Hermione breaks down in tears over the burnt cauldron was really, really well done. After all she went through during her seventh year, it seems perfectly understandable that she'd be dealing with PTSD occasionally - images and reminders from the war she'd been through. And that a seemingly unrelated thing - a cauldron blowing up - would set her off because she's been through so much that year, being on the run, robbing Gringotts, fighting in a war, being tortured, seeing people she knows die, travelling back in time, etc - and hasn't been able to release any of that emotion for the past year. So this felt long overdue, in a way. And it's nice that Severus was there for her in an entirely unselfish way. It says a lot about how far he's come.

And Slughorn catching them was hilarious, I agree. I'm glad they got a great laugh out of it, because she's right, they are absolutely the least likely students to be found like that!

I can't help but wonder if Severus likes her so much, why was he so mean to her in the future? I mean, he has to know that's the same person. Soo many questions. :P But so far you've done a great job of answering my questions several chapters later, almost like you are a time traveller yourself and also a mind reader.

Great work!

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Review #22, by marauderfanSaving Severus Snape : xviii.

25th June 2017:
Severus using puns! The idea for a potion internship became more 'attractive' :P Clever.

Their first kiss! I have to say, I kind of love that it wasn't fireworks and amazingness and instead it was just a bit awkward and weird as they are still trying to figure out where they stand with each other. After all, that's a bit more true to life, isn't it? I've never had any fireworks! XD

Also Remus is sweet and I adore him. It's nice that Hermione finally gets some positive words after so many people telling her to be careful.

I also think that Hermione isn't just bringing out something hidden about Severus, I think she's changing him, in a good way. Like, I kind of worry that when Hermione and Severus have their first fight, he'll get defensive and venomous (as he does), or he'll only show this sweet side to him when he's getting his way, but the more time that goes on I think Hermione is changing him. That's twice now that you've mentioned she's been able to get him out of a sulky mood when otherwise you know he'd be dwelling on something and sinking into hate for a lot longer, and now that he has something that makes him happy, it's changing him. Long story short, a compassionate Snape is a hard sell, and I will always have my skepticism, but you're doing a wonderful job of convincing me so far. :D Great chapter.

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Review #23, by marauderfanSaving Severus Snape : xvii.

25th June 2017:
She wasn't sure if being in 1976 and being his friend, or whatever she was turning into, would be enough, so she had come up with a backup plan. -- This is perfect. Not only because I was wondering this exact thing two chapters ago, but also because it is so like Hermione to come up with a backup plan for use 22 years in the future.

Hermione's antivenin project sounds really cool and if anyone can make it, she can. Plus with Snape's help they will be the most unbeatable potions team ever. Her request from Slughorn was a bit remeniscent of Tom Riddle asking for help, as she herself noted... the key difference being that Tom only wanted what he wanted for personal gain, and Hermione is trying to save someone's life.

You write Dumbledore really well, btw. He's a character I've always found so difficult to write, and you have his mannerisms down so well. Also, on the topic of dear old Dumbles, can I ask Dumbledore something? If he sent someone back in time to save Snape, why didn't he send anyone back in time to save James and Lily? How does he decide whose life is worth saving? After all, Voldemort killed a lot of other people, Muggles, muggle-borns, etc who died unnecessarily too.

(I don't think I'm supposed to think about this that much :P But Time-travel stories always make me think SO much.)

Last but not least, I can't believe you ended the chapter THERE. :P

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Review #24, by marauderfanSaving Severus Snape : xvi.

25th June 2017:
Snape trying to ask Hermione to dance was the best thing I've read this week. *wipes away laugh tears* I know I shouldn't be laughing, but omg. They are both so awkward and I love it. :D

And the story of why Severus is so good at dancing kind of broke my heart a little. I fully admit I'm not Snape's biggest fan, but the thought of little Severus and his mother enjoying rare moments of calm and happiness as she teaches him to dance, that hits me in the feels. Aw.

The last scene was explosive! I really didn't expect Hermione to lash out at Lily like that. I can get where Lily is coming from, after all, she was hurt pretty badly and it's natural that she would assume that Snape did something similar to Hermione. But from Hermione's pov, it makes sense that she would be annoyed that Lily keeps projecting all her own emotional baggage onto what's going on with Hermione. Hermione's right, it is a different circumstance, but... I dunno, if I were Lily, I'd be wary too.

One thing that's super interesting about this fic is that the characters you normally see as the protagonists and shown in kind of a flattering way in most fics, are the villains here, for lack of better term. (Not you know, Evil Scheming Villain With Stereotypical Mustache, but the kinds of characters who are always at odds with the protagonist). James, Sirius, and particularly Lily tend to be glorified in Marauder fics and the change in perspective here is really refreshing. They are people, not angels.

Another great chapter. Also I predict drama in the next one since Hermione ran away from her feelings and Severus probably is going to be closed off about it now. :P

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Review #25, by marauderfanSaving Severus Snape : xv.

25th June 2017:
MEEEGGG

I'm sorry I am the absolute worst and haven't kept up with this story for ages. I haven't had electricity since February. And you've been a writing powerhouse in the meantime and have written seven new chapters! So, now is when I try to catch up. Also, since last time I read this, the story has picked up so many awards there's not even room for more awards on the banner which is mega impressive so CONGRATS for writing such a wonderful and highly awarded story! Ok, seven chapters, here we go!

OMG the beginning of this chapter is great. At first I was kind of surprised the kiss was happening already and that both of them have already come to terms with their feelings with one another, but turns out it's just Hermione, and it wasn't even real! That must have been kind of a rude awakening to find out she's actually just dreaming! And to find that Amelia had taken her blankets off her. Brrr.

When she first realized she fancied Ron, the most she had to worry about was whether or not he fancied her back, but with Severus, she worried she could potentially ruin the very fabric of time. -- I hate it when that happens in a relationship. XD But seriously though what a difficult thing to contend with.

Aw. The way Hermione calms Severus down and gets him out of his angry sulky mood that arises when James and Sirius taunt him, it's great that she's able to get him to not dwell on it.

Dogweed and Deathcap is a perfect name for a potion shop. Is that canon or did you come up with it? I don't remember it in the books but it feels like it would fit right in.

Oh nooo. Nothing like entitled Death Eaters taking up your time while you're on a date and 100% ruining the mood.

. It's an absolute delight seeing him with a proper witch for a change, Lucius sneered. -- Joke's on you, Lucius.

The end of this chapter is really sweet. Hermione is falling fast, and I like how gradual and believable you've made the process of Severus opening up to her and showing emotions other than his typical mask. I do wonder more and more though, Dumbledore was never clear about when Hermione was to come back to the 90s (or how?) so she doesn't even know how long she's around in the 70s, and how long this will go on. What happens if Severus falls for her and then she disappears? I mean, surely that can't be good for his self esteem either. But at least he will have known that someone cared about him. Ah, I dont know. I'm just really curious how things will play out!

Great chapter!

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