Reading Reviews From Member: StarFeather
352 Reviews Found

Review #1, by StarFeatherThe Afterlife: Fidius Achates

23rd November 2015:
Hi,Dee. I stopped by to read your NaNo story.
I remember our chat about this story so I've been wondering how you'll develop your Teddy's story.

The beginning is very natural, starting a story from platform nine and three quarters, people always feel the fresh start at the scene of the station.

I chuckled at Harry's advice 'it's not fun to be late and to jump on the train or miss it entirely' and I'm glad you didn't forget how he took an important role as Teddy's godfather from now on.

When we think of Teddy's hair color, we wonder how to describe it, but you had his best mate call him in a unique way. I enjoyed the scene, 'You beautiful, green-no red-no blonde haired boy'.

The conversation between Teddy and his friends is very bright. I love the familiar scenes of strating new semester at Hogwarts, Hagrid, songs of Sorting Hat, a new professor, dinner at the Great Hall, passwords for CR.

You did really good job, Dee!


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Review #2, by StarFeatherChasing Life, Seeking Love, Keeping Hope: Owls, Owls....everywhere!

22nd November 2015:
Hi, I have a moment to read your Harry's story so I'd like to drop my thoughts as long as I can from my phone.
Wow, this chapter is so natural for HPFF fans to read through. You focused on each character's future career and described their mind movements very well. You traced the tales J. K. Rowling gave us after the defeat of Voldemort very well, too. And I like your way to describe Mr. and Mrs Weasley. Your story is full of affection and heart-warming at each scene of the story. I could visualize how Ginny’s face was like when she got a letter from Holy-Head Harpies and I think it a nice idea that Ron got a position for Keeper of C.C.
We shouldn’t forget to follow Hermione’s career as well.
I'm looking forward to reading the next!


Author's Response: Thanks for the kind review, Kenny. I try to write what I see in my mind without bogging the story down with lots and lots of unneeded detail. Emotions are important to me because, in my view, they describe the character's actions, thoughts and motives accurately, especially when combined with dialogue. Don't worry, Hermione is an important character in this story, as this story is more of a Harry/Ginny/Ron/Hermione story than just a Harry story, so she gets plenty of attention in the next chapters.

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Review #3, by StarFeatherChasing Life, Seeking Love, Keeping Hope: A letter for Harry

19th November 2015:
Hi, I came here to drop my thought.

The story began with an exciting letter, from Philbert Deverill, General Manager of Puddlemere United! Harry should be happy after he had experienced such a horrible war. If he was born in a peaceful world, he could enjoy quidditch for seven years at Hogwarts. So he deserves it.
He doesn't have to be an Auror, he has right to live in the way he wants to be. (As you may know, I'm strongly obsessed with Auror's stories, so I expect you to write about his career as an Auror after you finish this story. Okay, well, I don't mention my obsession here.)

It's very Harry-like that he wanted to set his NEWTs to join the Auror program. You describe like that: "I don't want to become known as the Boy Who Mooched."
To the contrary, Ron was easily to get the advantage, I enjoyed the gap between Harry and Ron. (I really like Ron's weakness as a human-being).

I like your description how Ginny and Harry discussed their future and the reason why he wants to be an Auror. Good job!

I hope I'll be back to the next chapter, soon.

Kenny (StarFeather)

Author's Response: Thanks for the great review, Kenny. I'm glad you like the direction the story is headed so far. I really enjoy Auror stories myself, so you will be glad to know I am planning one right after this story, but this story will take a while, so be patient. Come back soon to R & R chapter 2!

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Review #4, by StarFeatherThe Two of Us: Tension

14th November 2015:
Hi, Gabbie! Thank you for offering review swap.

Wow, you left review so quick!

The title "The two of us " reminded me of the same title, "The Two of Us" by Beatles, and I wondered who are "the two"? And I read summary and I expected what bittersweet experience George would have.
The first scene is filled with much tension. You put the climate description, ice and thick piles of snow, frost give much effect on their tensed situation. One of my favorite expressions here is "To see the giant squid doing a few laps, the sight oddly calmed the anger that was boiling in his heart.
We HP fans have never read the twin's quarrel so how you spend the time for this, I wonder. Was it hard for you imagine their suffeing?

I think to put these complicated feelings into words needed much energy, so many kudos on this. And a penny dropped. The two of us meant George and Fred. The two of them loved the same girl, Angelina. I'm always amazed by your writing style because you dig so deep each character's mind and emotions. I am not good at observing each character's mind and I can't write like you.

It's fresh to read serious Angelina because my impression about her, she's always angry about quidditch things in J.K.Rowling's books. You portrayed her swinging girl's heart between Fred and George very well.

They are fighting for a woman. What a drama! I'm looking forward to seeing what story you're preparing in the next chapter.


Author's Response: Hello!

Thanks for stopping by again for another review swap! I like to dish out reviews quickly! >:D

The Two of Us kind of has a double meaning, I'm not just talking about George/Angelina but about George and Fred too. Nice that you picked up on that! The line about the giant squid is my favorite too. :D

We never get the feeling that Fred and George fight about anything and I did have some trouble trying to write that scene. It took a long time to break it down and build a story around it. I usually try not to start chapters off right in the middle of drama like this so it was kind of tough.

Hmmm, I won't say that Fred loves Angelina just yet but I do love getting into my character's heads. I don't consider myself to be that good of a writer and with everything, all you need is patience and practice. Keep on writing and doing what you love.

I think Angelina's actually pretty sensitive in my version. Sure, she gets pumped up about Quidditch and stuff but she is a normal girl so I think that she would be really upset about everything.

I shall post a second chapter soon!

Much love,


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Review #5, by StarFeatherHarry Potter and the Conspiracy of Blood: The Greater Fool

12th November 2015:
Hi, Dan. Long time no see on the forums.

I thought it was about time to be back to your Harry, so I came back. (Review the Person Above)

It’s a good thing for the children who study to Hogwarts to go back to the Burrow to have family dinner.
I like the conversation between Charlie and Harry. I’m thinking to write about Charlie and dragons. George grew old, yet he is up to something.
You portrayed Molly and Arthur very well. Molly welcomes Harry, you visualized the scene very well,too. Though Harry worried about incidents and Hermione, he wouldn’t show his concern to Arthur. Everybody can’t stop smiling at Arthur. I was really impressed by his words, “We’re available” for battling dark wizards in their nineties.

Family Quidditch scene is awesome but there still left uneasy feeling, the absence of Ron and Hermione.
It’s clever of Harry to notice George’s plot. After the series of pranks and speeches, Harry seemed to have gone. I guess poor Harry couldn’t endure to speak of Ginny.

It’ll be interesting with a portrait of Phineas Nigellus Black. Will he help Draco and Astoria?

The conversation between Rose and Harry are well written, too. You portrayed how old Harry would be like. It’s very sad to think over his pain, but his emotion was beautifully expressed in every sentences. Talking about Ginny with Rose may heal his broken heart.

Wow, this chapter has various scenes. I enjoyed the attack scene, too. Poor Windsor! Is he alive? Could he manage to conjure his Patronus? A jet of red light means .. I tried to remember what the curse was.

It was good for Draco who knew the nasty Sectumsempra. When he hit the curse, I was relived. And again good show, Kriffin was in time to rescue him. I always enjoy your action scene!

What? Were all the attacks for nothing but to kill Flint from the first place? Is the real journal hidden in the other place? What is Lady Tenabra’s evil plan?

I hope I’ll be back again soon.


Author's Response: Hi, Kenny!

Unfortunately work hasn't been leaving me a lot of time for HPFF lately. Life in a startup company is like that... well, it's like that most of the time. I carve out little bits of time where I can.

Having the Weasleys pull all of their children out of Hogwarts for a family dinner isn't really something that happens in canon, but I still liked the idea. Besides, who's going to say no to Molly if she wants to have a family dinner?

I really enjoyed writing the Quidditch match. This story gets so heavy at times. It needs moments of levity to keep it on an even keel. And you're right, Harry couldn't handle the idea that he might have to talk about Ginny.

The bust of Headmaster Black isn't really going to be much of a help to Draco. It's mostly just going to make fun of him.

Harry and Rose have a special sort of bond. I enjoyed developing that.

Draco learned a lot of things during the war. Some of them, he wishes that he could forget. But he is able to fight his way out of a bad spot.

You're correct that the book Flint stole from Malfoy Manor was a ruse. To what end? You'll have to wait and see. ;) Lady Tenabra has many things up her sleeves.

Look forward to seeing you again soon!

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Review #6, by StarFeatherThis is Audrey Tang: The Bad Taste: The Heat of the Moment

10th November 2015:
Hi, Gabbie!

I’m really impressed by your unique portrait of Percy. Looking back how J.K.Rowling wrote about him, reading your Percy, I think your story is really original and very passionate, so this one stands alone. His feeling towards Audrey is very special but he can’t hide his sarcastic feeling and his weakness.
What you did good jobs is not only expression about their need but also their concerning each other.

I expected Percy’s secret would be revealed to Audrey in the middle of this chapter. But you set another scene before it.

I like their conversation about their parents and her dream, to be an actress. I think this is the first story written about the reason why Percy studied so hard at Hogwarts. To get Molly's and Arthur’s attention, he tried getting top mark! And Audrey led the conversation in that way. Nice plot! Besides you showed us glimpses of Billy, Charlie and George! Another expectation, I wonder how you’ll introduce Weasleys and his friends in the magic world to Audrey in the next chapters.

And finally, after intimate flirtation, he would confess he was a wizard! The expectation was rising. But before the scene, you set another twists and turns. Nasty Joseph Wring will be attacked by Percy! How intriguing! Will Percy do magic to beat the beast? Just my imagination. Percy will do his magic to vanquish Wring with his powerful magic.

Thank you for review swap!

Author's Response: Hello!

Thanks for stopping by again, Kenny! I always really love your reviews, they make me so happy.

I always thought that Percy could be an interesting character if we knew more about him but we don't have much to go on in canon. I'm trying to keep JK's influence as well as my own, though I think he's drifting farther away from canon sometimes. Hahah.

I can't focus too much on Percy and Audrey craving each other, I wanted to show that there was actual depth to their feelings for one another too.

I never really have anyone really commenting on that part of Percy's character. Why is he such an overachiever? Maybe it was just an attempt to get his parent's attention? I think it's a high possibility. Audrey has an ambition to be an actress while Percy is determined to be the best, they have that in common.

Hmmm, I'm up to chapter eleven or twelve right now on my flashdrive and Audrey has met George again. I haven't gotten to her meeting anyone else yet. I have it all planned out though so I hope you'll like it when it's up!

Percy's confession about being a wizard is up in a few more chapters, actually. I hope you like seeing the beast!

Much love,


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Review #7, by StarFeatherEverto Trucido: Words, Words, Words

5th November 2015:
Hi, Rumpel. I came back here, your magical world.

I understand how it's like for Grace, lack of sleep causes irritated feeling.
The story that Grace and Lyall Lupin defeated a lethifold is interesting, I like the episode the best in this chapter!

What Lily Evance shared a dorm with Grace sounds nice, it's sad we know her destiny though.
And the idea she got scars, the House symbols is unique, what do they mean to her?

Grace and marauders plus Snape, your HP AU world is very unique.I've never encountered such wonderworld before.
I wonder how you'll develope this complicated relationship and the fight between Dumbledore and Voldemort.


Author's Response: :D Hey, Kenny!

Thanks, I had fun with the lethifold, I love magical creatures (especially dark magical creatures)!

Oh the House symbols will be getting worked out of the plot (I'm not really sure if they come up again after this chapter). I have way too many subplots happening!

Yeah, there's a TON happening! I used to keep notes all over the wall behind my computer to keep track of the plots ;).

Thanks for the review!


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Review #8, by StarFeatherJigsaw: Piece #6

5th November 2015:
Hi, Sian. I saw your update status for Jigsaw, so I came back here.
Wow, in your magical world, they use Muggle mobile phone, it’s clever!

When I read these parts, “ so magical London is a little quieter, with the children back at school and the majority of tourists returning to warmer climes,”
I remembered when I visited Scotland like a picture I took, I saw some school children in their uniform.

Oh, was Simon Upton released without charge? So both Hitwizards and Aurors couldn’t find enough evidence to send him to Azkaban.

I feel pity for Roxanne, I wish she won’t be back to the previous boring articles.

Though there’re lots of your splendid descriptions, I like this sentence, too!! "Gringotts rises up ahead of me, the snowy white like peaks of mountains, almost disappearing into the haze of warm sunlight, dominating the wizarding skyline.”

And the next paragraphs are very intriguing. What happened to Jane? Is she missing?

I also like the description of Belby’s. We have the similar second hand book shops in my country, I could imagine how the bookshop was like.

I really like the episode why Roxanne became a journalist, “I’ve spent so many of my days off in here that they know me by name now,.. it’s not knowledge I’m searching for, but stories-even the faded inscriptions written inside a front cover tell a tale. My passion for stories is the real reason I became a journalist,”

And wow,wow, she met Daniel at her favorite bookshop, what a situation! After her letter, how would he react? With much expectation, we wait for his next move. And he nods! Even he suggested somewhere on Diagon Alley, there’s still hope they can go back together.

Oh, Daniel understands her well. “I always said that Higgins was an idiot for not giving you a bigger story before.” He cares about her.

“it’s one of the reasons I fell in love with him in the first place.” Reading this part, I nodded, too, wishing he would forgive her.

Her thought, “Upton possibly had for harming Armstrong is the recent promotion they were both competing for, which the latter eventually attained,” is correct but why did she feel a bit flimsy?

“I can see the glint in his eye that makes it clear he’s just thought of an idea, a sliver of the mystery becoming clearer to him as he talks it through with me.” This sentence is inviting us to the next chapters of your story. We wish Roxanne and Daniel will get together and solve the case.

When she told Daniel that she still did love him, I wished “Believe her!” And finally, he said, “I believe you.” Yes! But he said later, “I need time, Roxy,” oh again? No! If I were Daniel, I would forgive her. Oh, poor Roxy, she kept the tears from appearing in her eyes.

Sian, I really like how you ended this chapter. They will go to the spot where Armstong was found. I hope I’ll be able to be back to the next chapter, soon!


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Review #9, by StarFeatherPride and Scorpius: Well met on the Hogwarts Express

3rd November 2015:
Hi, Andrew! Thank you for offering review swap!

The banner and CI seem to be drawn by hand. Did you draw them? If so, it’s awesome.
I’m wondering whether I should do, too.

What a coincidence, I just started writing about the Next Gen so, I jumped into here with your suggestion. And I feel contended with the plot very well. I’ve never encountered the kind of this story. Most of the Next Gen I read is centered on the relationship between Scorpius and Rose, romance. So what you started with the scene at the station, their first year gives us fresh feeling and you set Scorpius as a weak character who worries how he is looked by the others for his father’s past. I really like this kind of plot. I should’ve visited yours earlier.

I also like you set Rose as a character who dislikes Scorpius just like her father. What Harry didn’t mention about Malfoy so much to his second son will likely happen considering his humble character.

Wow, Scorpius wishes to be sorted to Gryffindor. It’ll be more interesting. I can’t wait to go to the next chapter. (But I have to write mine for NaNo so I’ll be back again within a week.)

Kenny aka StarFeather

Author's Response: I'm glad that you took up my offer, thanks for the review back.

Yes all my chapter images and the banner so far have been painted by me. Please do, I would like to see anything that anyone else paints.

I am trying to do a slightly different take upon the usual version of what people accept Next Gen to be. But really, due to the lack of anything official beyond the epilogue and a few things JKR wrote for Pottermore, Next-Gen can be whatever we want it to be.

So normally Scorpius is presented as a carbon copy of his father coming to school and he is either changed for the better by his experiences or not. I wanted to try out his character a different way and see what the results would be.

Rose does dislike him, but it is more because of how he acts and not because of what her father has told her. Albus is kind and caring and I hope a worthy successor to his father.

It's more that Scorpius doesn't want to be a Slytherin, than he actively wants to be a Gryffindor. He would actually be quite happy in Ravenclaw.

Thanks for the lovely review, as of this review the story has had 4325 reads and this chapter has had 831, thank you all.

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Review #10, by StarFeatherSinister Whispers: Chapter One

24th October 2015:
The title, 'Sinister Whisper' sounds intriguing.
In July 1995, the girl named Katherine entered. She is apparently Pure-Blood and you mentioned Cedric Diggory's death then I knew the story has begun at that time. So she supported Harry's side. Oh, wait, is she a daughter of Rowle? That means she's a daughter of Death Eater. I know Burke is Pure Bloods. I remember the Black Family tree. I even chose the name Burke for Augusta Longbottom's previous last name in my story, 'Cygnus Black and his three daughters'. I had hunch the story would be more interesting.
I got relieved when I heard some Gryffindor names, Angelina, Harry and George. You seemed to create your own characters and your own fan fiction world, which is great! I expect how Katherine will struggle to find a way out not to join the Dark Lord's inner circle from now on. And I wonder how you'll develop the story putting George, Harry and the Dark Lord's followers. I hope I will be able to be back to the next chapter soon.

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Review #11, by StarFeatherUnconfirmed Reports: [S1:E1] Pilot/"The Pluckley Anomaly"

23rd October 2015:
Hi, Kevin. I came back to your story from the forums, “Review Exchange Pairings October”.

Level Nine, the Department of Mysteries, a professional Unspeakable entered. We’ve already known the storey (floor) in J.K.Rowling’s book but your way to start a new story gives us the expectation about the unknown world to explore as your other works did. The visualization is marvelous. I could even hear his breathing. I like your description about the furniture as you did in Hermione’s office in the story, “Calculus”.

I guess the story will be mixed with political rivalry as your previous work and the main character seemed to be far away from the kind of controversy but he may be involved in them against his will.

His boss felt irritated at the young Unspeakble, Samuel and you put their relationship in the middle then the woman entered, the atmosphere suddenly changed by her. Pitch-black slacks let us imagine how she was slender or looks intelligent, at least I felt like that. We can easily guess he hates the meeting with his boss by his attitude that he thinks of the woman distracted the reflection of her handshake.

Apparently, Kieran seems to be Scottish or Irish, right? The strong accent sounds so.
When the investigation was begun by the two Unspeakbles, I wondered why it was their job to search something. Kevin, why did you set Unspeakables for the investigation? Or I wondered it might be the things were getting out of hand for Aurors. I might miss the explanation in the story… As we read further, I think I could get it. They are searching the clue the Auror couldn’t find out.

More than three times, Samuel rubbed the stubble of his jowl. The description is impressive. The small habit sometimes gives us a strong impact.

I liked the description of their camping outside in the nature after the eventful evening. Enjoying the scene, I wondered what the fleeting flash of light Samuel witnessed in the building was. Outside of the building, the investigation was continued. I could imagine the sound of the fire was crackling near the tent.

There left some wonders. Seven stone, runes and was the bird which flew away the unregistered animagi?

Overall there’re plenty of familiar spells and action, I enjoyed it. The brunette Kellyn Landreth reminded me of the other brunette coroner in “Shetland” at BBC.


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Review #12, by StarFeatherFriends...friends...friends...: Friends...friends...friends...

19th October 2015:
Hi, Pookha.

I stopped by from the forums.

I like Luna’s episode about her friendship. The scene where Harry found the painting in her room is still so vivid in my mind, one of the most impressive episodes of the book 7.
So I had a feeling that this story wouldn’t betray my expectation and it is really good.

The idea that her charm can show their health is great.
Even if they parted and started walking each path, they can contact each other, which is very heart warming.

I smiled at Ron’s words and attitude, “I got held up by some paperwork that wonder-boy here didn’t finish.” And “Ron started to say something, but Hermione and Harry had kicked him under the table." I really like him.

Thank you for sharing this story.


Author's Response: Thanks so much for the nice review. I appreciate the kind words. I found this story half-finished in my binder and wondered why I never finished it, so I sat down and finished it over two nights.

I'm so glad you enjoyed Ron's characterization, too.

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Review #13, by StarFeatherM·A·R·A·U·D·E·R·S: The One With The Very Merry Little Christmas

18th October 2015:
Hi, Lauren.

Thank you for making the Den’s Digest October and setting Review Exchange Pairings October.

I like the first sentence: the memory of the Quidditch dream he’d been having slowly fizzled away.
And “the thick red duvet” reminded me of the Harry Potter film exhibition at Tokyo. We saw the very duvet on the four-poster in the set.

Christmas at Potters sounds fun. It must be nice the magical knife butters toast before we eat it.

Oh, Lauren, you managed to use the names, “Fleamont and Euphemia”. I heard those names at first, I didn’t feel like using them. So many kudos on using them so naturally. I like their conversation. The words of Fleamont and Euphemia are full of affection towards their only son.

I smiled at the phrase, “the only person Felamont Potter’s hair potion didn’t work on was his son.”

Wow wow, Peter put on the turkey on his head, which reminded me of “Mr. Bean”!
“The House of Horrors is REAL!” I imagined the girls would scream at the sight.

Then beautiful Lily jumped in to the view. The description is well written. I could imagine how James was mesmerized by her beauty in the snow.

They enjoyed quizes! Lauren, you’re good at solving them and I wondered if it’s common to spend Christmas time playing quiz in your country.
The game turned to be the girl team’s victory. I wondered what would be like if the boy team won. I feel like to see how the girls might help with boys’ prank.

Oh, when you put cheddar in the cake, it will be such a bad taste? I like cheddar so I really want to know. It’s an interesting episode!

The last scene was very romantic. As I read your previous work, “The Walk To Your Beloved” which was written from Lily’s POV, I enjoyed the story from James’s POV.


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Review #14, by StarFeatherTurbulence: Chapter 1

18th October 2015:
Hi, Erin.

Thank you for adopting me for NaNo.

I remembered your Astoria and stopped by again.

I imagined she would be fine with her friends at school but her mother told her in her letter, “The Dark Lord is back. Stay safe.” The House of Horrors is REAL!
And she also mentioned to take her medicine. I remembered her condition as well.

She counted her footsteps, keeping the pace steady, does this mean she had learned how to control her emotion? I remembered how your Tory was like when she was a small child.
I guess she had to walk through the path hard to the ordinary life like the other students since her mother sent her to the different school from Hogwarts.

When I read the scene where the boys were bullying the girl, I had hunch Astoria would lose her controlling herself. And I wondered what spell she used. It’s quite thrilling to read she beat the nasty boys who did harm to her friend.

The situation around her was revealed little by little. She must be feeling bitter remembering Hogwarts. I was amazed by your creativeness again, Erin. How could you think of the new school life? It’s very original. The way to pass the dorm seems to be easier than that of Hogwarts. I expect what interesting things will happen next. I hope to be back soon.


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Review #15, by StarFeatherLet Perpetual Light: A Funeral

18th October 2015:
Hi, Teh.

Thank you for adopting me for NaNo.

I’ve checked this story which got Dobby Awards, and I’ve been curious to read since Dan recommended to read it. So it’s about time to explore your story.
The House of Horrors is REAL, I felt excited to know how Dumbledore’s mother died. I wondered how her children would feel after her death.

The story began with the letter, I wondered who wrote it. I guessed Grindelwald wrote it at first. The expression “your whole life and mine, separate, forked like a serpent’s tongue” is very impressive. And I wondered what the following sentence implied: And yet all forks have a single, stout root that they cannot leave behind.

Then my guess was right. The last part was about the Three. I felt excited remembering them and wondered if Dumbledore had beat Grindelwald so he sent the letter from the prison.

Then the scene was switched to the funeral day of Kendra. Your description about young Dumbledore is awesome. I think Dumbledore was like the man you wrote in this chapter.
His appearance is friendly to anyone and didn’t show his true feeling and thoughts to others.

The conversation between him and Bagshot was interesting, too. Her attitude changed, which is very intriguing. What did she try to say to Dumbledore?

The thoughts of Dumledore seeing his mother in the casket made me imagine many things. I have seen funerals and the deceased person in the casket and wondered about the life of human-beings reading this scene.

The last sentences are very impressive. Especially, this one: untimely loss of Kendra Dumbledore as well as the death of his very own life.

The latter part of this story is full of mystic mood. Ariana hid her magic from her mother and her brother Albus saw her with his piercing blue eyes to search for something. I’m eager to read the next chapter to see what will happen next.


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Review #16, by StarFeatherJigsaw: Piece #5

18th October 2015:
Hi, Sian!

Thank you for leaving kind review the other day. As you’ve written below, the mystery of Daniel and Fred have finally been revealed.
The House of Horrors is REAL. Jealousy makes people go mad.

The description of London skyline is superb! I imagined how it was like remembering that of Tokyo. We have the very same view: forest of tall buildings and pedestrians below look like ants indeed.

In the next paragraph, the culprit entered finally drinking expensive water of life, whiskey. I wondered what whiskey he was drinking. (I recommend him Yamazaki, Japanese expensive whiskey.) Then two men appeared from the green flames. Are they Hit Wizards? He knew who they were, glancing at them, I guess they may be members of Potter or Wealsey.

The reason why Roxanne and Daniel broke up was revealed, too. I could understand their complicated relationship. The man was too busy to spare time for his girlfriend and the woman was unhappy for his long absence. I had hunch that it would be more difficult for her to get back their previous relationship when Lily entered.

At the end, please let me mention your wonderful poetic expression. I’m very impressed by your work again. I love these sentences: the tiny ember of hope that I thought was extinguished the last time that I saw him reignites, a chain of maybes and what ifs floating through my mind.

I hope I can be back to the next chapter soon!


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Review #17, by StarFeatherThe Family Business: One: Prologue - Disappearing

16th October 2015:
Team Gold @Gryffindor Review Battle October

Hi, Lizzie!
To tell the truth, I’ve visited here before and I wondered why I didn’t leave review. Then I remembered that I would do after the next chapter was up. When I read this at first time, I felt the story will be interesting. Please write the next chapter, Lizzie!

The banner is very impressive. I expect something big story will be developed. As your other works did, your mysterious description attracted me from the beginning. I wondered who possessed “earthy brown-green eyes”.
“the vast collection of precious artifacts gathered around him prevented him from stretching his legs out, in fear of destroying something.” Is he a kind of scientist or inventor? He has italian accent, so is he an Italian?

Claire, with “white-gloved fingers”, is a detective? Oh, “Egyptian glyphs”! I have hunch the story will go more interesting! Lizzie, have you read APerkins’ s story at HPFF? Please stop by the story, which may give you some inspiration. While reading your story, I remembered.

"Muggle Runes? Germanic or Nordic?" I felt very intriguing about “Nordic” part. Do they have glyphs? I want to know.

And they’re kissing and..oh wait, Have they gone ? The weird magical light took them away? I’m eager to know the next story.


Author's Response: Kenny!!

Thanks so much for stopping by!

Don't worry, the next chapter will be up first thing in November, and I'll hopefully get some updates done fairly quickly since this story is my NaNo project.

Sorry, Seb's not a scientist or an inventor and Claire isn't a detective! Don't worry, you'll find out soon enough!

I'll definitely have to check out that story! Thanks for the recommendation!

Runes are sort of like glyphs, except they come from Europe, not Egypt/Middle East. Basically, there are two types, ones that come from Germany and others that come from Denmark - which is what I mean by Nordic. Both runes and glyphs are some of the earliest forms of writing, which is why they're important here.

You'll find out what happens to them soon enough, Kenny! Thanks so much for reading and reviewing! I'm so glad you're enjoying this story so far!


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Review #18, by StarFeatherThis Final Adventure : Chapter 1

12th October 2015:
Hi, Meg! I came here from the forums!

I was very impressed from the start.
The first parts reminded me of his brother Sirius. What you wrote about Regulus, which is the opposite POV, “He harbored a soft spot for the elf who had more or less raised him. His first friend. The first person-and yes, he thought of him as a person-that he could remember truly caring for.” His brother didn’t think of Krecher in that way, he hated him.

I wondered if Regulus asked Kreacher to take him to the cave where Voldemort hid one of his Horcuxes. Then you started describing the episode beginning with Bellatrix. I felt exceited. She’s one of my favorite characters. She’s so unique and attractive to write for the authors. I’ve never read the scene where she and Regulus work together, so it’s impressive and I guessed the dead girl was Emily Vance, right? The idea Regulus felt jealous towards a pair of James and his brother is interesting, too.

Oh, Meg! I really really like the last sentences when they arrived at the cave. So beautiful and you wrote the inner movement of his mind very well. I’ll be back soon.


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Review #19, by StarFeatherRabbit Heart: 14. Guarded Hearts

11th October 2015:
Hi, Pixi!

I came back here again in Halloween month. Your vampire rabbit story suits this season very well, isn’t it?

I’ve been worried how Wren would be tainted by the vampire rabbit. I felt terrified imagining that Dillon finally possessed her and could order anything to her. But I felt relieved to read she could regain her consciousness after drinking Smeed’s tea. And the wristband Albus gave her will guard her from now on, right?

Rose’s behavior around boys reminded me of her father, Ron. She will detour to find her real boyfriend like her father did, won’t she?

Wren’s friends know how she and Albus will be a good couple more than her. Though Wren regretted what she did mess in the Slytherin boy’s dorm, I think Albus didn’t care. I wish they will find Dillon’s trick via his rabbits sooner.

My expectations in the next chapters are:

James will do some roles related Dillon’s plot.

Smeed and his partner will find clues to Dillon’s trick. Or Harry’s Auror Headquarters will find some clues preceding them. Well, it can’t be. I guess your plot will be Smeed’s team’s victory in its investigation.

Albus and Wren are getting to know each other and find true feeling each other and will get closer.

Gran will suddenly wake up! (My wish. I know it’s surreal but if so it’ll be great that strong Augusta will come back! And one of Wren’s problem will be solved.)


Author's Response:

Hi Kenny!

I think you're right. Halloween and strange rabbits go together very well. :)

Wren has a few things that will keep her from too much harm. Keep your fingers crossed for her.

Rose simply doesn't know what she wants, or rather, she doesn't want to admit to wanting what she wants, if that makes sense. Unfortunately for Wren and Albus, they have to get through the current events before they have time to think of anything else. They're... busy right now.

I love reading your expectations for what's coming next. You'll have to read further to see if you're correct.

Thanks for coming back to my story!


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Review #20, by StarFeatherWildest Dreams: Wildest Dreams

11th October 2015:
Hi, Stefi! Thank you for beta reading the other day.

I thought of exploring your another work.

When I started reading, I liked the description, you mentioned, “She carried only a small, green backpack and large Nikon camera around her neck”. I really like the first description, “her golden-hair looked like a halo” and the description of the weather and a bar. Very picturesque.

I have an experience to travel by bus across the east coast of the U.S., so I could easily imagine how her trip was like. The U.S. is very very big.

Mystery began when the man felt supernatural in Dominique. I also like the description about him, “tan sun-kissed” and “the exact colour of the desert.” The conversation and the description of the couple are well written, Stefi! I remembered my first date with my wife driving a car.

Oh, my Merlin, last parts of this story so beautiful and so sad. His memory about a mysterious angel-like woman and the magnificent landscape on the border.

I think you could write a happy ending but what you didn’t is very beautiful and unforgettable awesome masterpiece!

Thank you for sharing this!


Author's Response: Hi Kenny!

Thanks so much for the sweet review! You and your wife's first date must have been so lovely!

I personally have never been to the Southern US and I've never traveled across the country by bus either, so I'm glad the description here still came through.

Thanks so much for all your kind words!


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Review #21, by StarFeatherThis is Audrey Tang: The Bad Taste: Rich Expectations

10th October 2015:
Hi, Gabbie! Thank you for review swap!

What I was impressed here is that you mentioned the season in the story: the warm spring air, the warm summer air was suddenly a blessing and the winter.

‘That makes two of us,’ Audrey’s words are impressive, too. Both Percy and Audrey are so stubborn to admit that they are attracted each other, fell in love with each other desperately. They have each problem, and both of them don’t have confidence in themselves. Especially, Percy has many things to hide from her. But eventually he will reveal himself little by little like Audrey does as well in the previous chapter and this chapter.

The big difference between the previous chapter and this chapter is, you expressed how they were magnetic each other physically but you added more mental part to the steamy description about their need in this chapter, so readers understand they are getting to know each other and expect how Percy will show his magical world to her.

Both of them hate to be given pity from the others, but it seems Percy shows his honest feeling that he simply hopes that he wants to talk to her for a while longer and “being here with her for a while longer”. These feelings are very important, which indicates he would think her as his partner forever.

Totally I'm amazed by your detailed description about their passionate relationship and struggle to respect each other.

Let's do review swap again!


Author's Response: Hello!

Thank you so much for another great review, Kenny. I really appreciate it! :D

I think I mentioned that it was spring or so in a previous chapter but you never really get the sense that it is. That's my fault! Hahaha.

I think that you're right about Percy and Audrey being stubborn. I don't really think that they've ever met anyone like them before so they clash quite a bit. Percy is hiding something from Audrey and she's hiding her real feelings from him. I think that the truth is going to be revealed soon though.

I wanted to focus more on their emotional connection in this chapter. I know how physically attracted to each other they were but I wanted to make it clear that that wasn't all that they wanted from each other. Percy for some reason is a lot more honest about his feelings than Audrey and he does indicate that he wants to be with her more in just this one chapter. It's a shame that Audrey is so stubborn. Hahaha.

Thank you for coming back!

Much love,


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Review #22, by StarFeatherIgnite: Fever Pitch

8th October 2015:
Hi, I’m happy to be back to your story again. The story got more interesting after the first student caught the unidentified infection in the previous chapter. I’m completely knocked out by your well planned characterization. If I don’t have work tomorrow, I’d like to read till the end of the story. One after another, teachers got sick and most of the students caught the contagion and Rose Weasley had to be charged with looking after them. Even Lily Potter was caught. Plus a drunken unreliable professor. How can I say, it’s thrilling, can’t stop reading, not only mystery but also full of friendship. And you set one more entertainment for readers. Investigation by desperate students. At least Methuselah Jones isn’t desperate, I know. I’m certain he will help Scorpius with finding answers.

I enjoyed the scene of the question and the answer in front of Ravenclaw CR. How did you think of the question?

I’ll be back tomorrow! Congrats, Dobby Awards!


Author's Response: Really glad you're enjoying the story! Things pick up from here, heavily. :-D Nobody really knows what they're doing, and while Methuselah's pretty smart and confident, he IS also only a 16 year-old boy!

I can't lie; I trawled riddle books and pages and the like to find the question. I am no Riddle-smith.

Thank you!!

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Review #23, by StarFeatherThis is Audrey Tang: The Bad Taste: Scrumptious

7th October 2015:
Hi, Gabbie! Thank you for leaving kind review on my one-shot. I came back here.

You keep the tension between Percy and Audrey, I wondered how much energy you needed to write about them. The first half, you wrote about her unsure feeling about Percy, she wonders if he has a real interest in her. May I call this love game? I think you described about their complicated feeling: Audrey can’t have confidence in herself, and Percy has secret, of course, he is a wizard, as we know. And his anger, I guess he can’t forgive himself for Fred’s death.

The heartwarming scene here is Audrey was surprised by the concern in his gaze. Percy made her happy. And he thought her showing her gratitude toward him awkwardly was adorable. The gap between her and him was getting closed.

And her outburst remind us of the way how they met at the first place. And wow, wow, though it took much time for Percy to confess his real feeling towards Audrey, he did it!
The conversation after passionate kiss from him was like Scarlett O’Hara and Rhett Butler. I felt the similar stubbornness in Audrey and Scarlett. Very dramatic ending!


Author's Response: Hello!

Thank you so much for all of your kind reviews, Kenny. They're so lovely and I always enjoy reading them! :D

I used up a lot of energy writing this scene and thank God it turned out okay. They're just so exhausting! Audrey and Percy are really strong characters and getting into their heads is hard sometimes. I think that they've been playing a love game for quite some time and their insecurities made it all the more clear.

Fred's death is a main reason for why Percy acts the way he does but I don't go into it until much later.

I think that the outburst towards the end is what we all were waiting for. It's great to see them finally coming together and that kiss has gotten such a great response! Oh, goodness! I don't think anyone has ever compared this to timeless Hollywood actors before! Thank you!


Much love,


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Review #24, by StarFeatherSomething Unforseen: Something Unforseen

6th October 2015:
Hi, Molly.

I wish you’ll have some time to read and I understand how long it’ll take you to get used to a new life.

Wow, first sentences hold profound meaning. And what you described how the summer passed for Albus and his friends, introducing the weather, made me enter your world of Albus and Scorpius smoothly.

There was one spot I couldn’t understand well: Scorpius always made a big deal of telling us about that if he had been only five days older he would have been in the year above us at Hogwarts. He was a pain sometimes back then.
But after reading the last scene, I could understand. Scorpius wanted to spend time with James as a peer at Hogwarts, right?

When Molly entered, the atmosphere got warm.
I wondered why Scorpius felt disappointed when he knew James didn’t show up. Then he met James, the riddle was revealed. Did he have special feeling towards James?

And I enjoyed the two-aside Quidditch scene. I like the idea Harry made sandwiches for children before they went to bed.

Hmm, scones and clotted cream and with blackberry jam Grandma Molly made sound yummy. I’d like to eat them all.

Wow Harry taught his son new charm on his birthday. Cool idea!

Oh, I could guess what would happen but when I think how Albus felt, it must be shocking for him.

Thank you for review swap! Let’s do it again.


Author's Response: Thanks Kenny for reading and reviewing, and thank you for swapping with me!

It was a long time since I wrote this, but I still like this story. It was written for a challenge originally, but the challenge was abandoned... My point was to surprise, and it seems like I did. ;-)

I'm glad that you could feel the atmosphere when Molly showed up. I always love writing her. (Yep, it's no secret that I love her...!)


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Review #25, by StarFeatherWhat Are You Waiting For: What Are You Waiting For

4th October 2015:
Hi, Frankie! I came here for birthday review!

I got curious you had a sequel to Jarvey.

To be honest, I read lots of Drarry here and there in the past, because I like their tension and the gap after they notice each other. And your description was started from Albus’s POV, it’s quite unique and your rich smooth words reminded me of your other wonderful work, “Beautiful Mess”. I got jealous of your ability again. I can’t write like this way. You deepen his feeling inside his mind.

From the scene at the library, your Scorpius leads Albus at each romantic spot. To the contrary his father was led by Harry, I mean Harry was a Savior after all and he was obsessed with detecting what Draco was up to. And you set Scorpius guides Albus in a secret meeting. I enjoyed the difference, too. But the last words “What are you waiting for?” were from Albus, right? If so, Albus could take lead at the last.


Author's Response: Hey Kenny,

This was so kind! I really enjoyed writing this sequel. And you can write well, I really enjoy how far you have come with your writing!
Albus did say that at the end, but it is also a line from a song. I dont think that means he will start to take the initiative but I think he begins to gain some confidence and that he really cares for Scorpius.

Thanks for the very kind review :)

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