Reading Reviews From Member: StarFeather
562 Reviews Found

Review #1, by StarFeatherIn the Mourning: A Gryffindor is Not a Morning Person

21st August 2016:
Hi,Bex! I named my review activity "Reviewmon Go!" and finally I reached your story.
I've been curious since I found your post, bc your arts @TDA are familiar to me. I didn't know you would write stories. It's great!
We know the scene where Harry and Hermione visit the grave of the Potters in the seventh book, but nobody has focused on the episode. Especially, in his fifth year. It's reasonable that he missed his parents.

The descriptions about Minerva and Harry are just amazing. I chuckled at the chapter title "A Gryffindor Is Not a Morning Person" and the spot, "The old woman said before stifling a yawn, she clearly wasnít a fan of mornings either." It's unique your choice was coffee for McGonagall not tea.

I wonder why you chose the time when Umbridge was controlling Hogwarts. It's very intriguing. Did Harry need to talk to his dead parents about his future? Feeling stressed towards Dumbledore, he wanted peace of mind, maybe? I'll come back to see how you'll develop the story next.


Author's Response: hey kenny!! Thank you so much for reviewing :D

I actually started writing before I made graphics, like way back late 2009/early 2010 - all those stories are gone now, but I kind of missed it, and had a lot of ideas - so I'm back with a couple.

I think coffee is what everyone has on a morning to wake them up, well it is for me. Tea doesn't seem to have the same effect. I promise you, Minerva loves both coffee and tea - but uses the two for different occasions, aha!

I think I chose this time because it's when Harry felt like he really needed family, or he needed peace of mind. Everything was starting to change and with Dumbledore not talking to him there's not many adults around to guide him.

Again Kenny, thanks so much for the review!!


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Review #2, by StarFeatherJigsaw: Piece #12

18th August 2016:
Hi,Sian. I named my review activity as "Reviewmon Go!", and I chose your story for the 1st round. Finally, Roxy got her real job. I expect more Daniel with her to solve those incidents from here.

I've worried if Jane was involved with a kind of terrible troubles, but she didn't. I felt relieved and it's great that Roxy took her in, which will be better for Roxy who has to find out the truth behind the scenes. I suspect someone trapped Richard. I sense a kind of conspiracy.

Two people were talking about Rhiannon. "Will she live?" and "compromise us." sound creepy. If Roxy's hunch is right,I'm afraid that she would be attacked next. I hope her uncle Harry and her cousins will help her. I guess you prepared more action scenes from here. I'll come back. :)


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Review #3, by StarFeatherMuggle Studies: Muggle Studies

3rd August 2016:
Hi, Isobel! Late late Hot Seat Review!

Now I'm amazed by our work after I finished reading your story. When I saw banner of your story and read the summary, I had no idea that you would write a big story like this.

On the first half, I interpreted that you wrote how Tiberius was obsessed with the idea of learning Muggle studies and persuading his father to allow him to. Even he was kept in detention after he discussed the way with his friend, and involved his friends in the operation to pursue the aim to get the permission. You created a determined young man who pushed forward trying every possible means.

And I was struck with awe when I read the latter half. You incorporated all problems in our mordern world, nukes, agricltural problems. Knowing Muggles deeper led Tiberius to erase Gomez who was Muggle-Born. You portrayed how the crime was committed from the beginning by epistolary technique, it was marvelous. You expressed how dangerous the young man who is tied to one ideology is, through J.K.Rowling's magical world. I was very very impressed by your great work!


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Review #4, by StarFeatherAlbus Potter and the Mystic Ruins: The Attacks

2nd August 2016:
Hi, Theia! I'd like to drop the first gift for the third place at Auror's Tale Story Challenge Season 2. After "HP and the Cursed Child" was released, I think of my next generation story, wondering if I did right. How about you? I'm very curious to read your Albus centric story!

Oh, Albus was sorted into Slytherin. I set him as Gryffindor. It's interesting to see your Slytherin Albus. Even though he is Slytherin, reading his dialogues, which reminds me of his father's school days, discussing about his fahter's investigation and voicing out his opinion.

"Mind Clearance" is very intriguing. I wonder if it is similar to Occlumency effect. Albus will be a Potions Master, which is great! Snape of the portrait must be happy with the fact.

Your charcteriztion of Rose is unique. It may be the first time to read the kind of mischievous Rose. Oh, no, their friend's parents were killed. It's shocking.

Ha ha ha, what a naughty girl, Rose. It was the caricature that was stuck on Scorp!

I hope you can update this soon. Take care!


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Review #5, by StarFeatherHurricane Luna: They Fall in a Cave

27th July 2016:
Hi, Beth! One more Hot Seat Review!

I checked J.K.Rowling's "Fantastic Beasts & Where to Find Them." I didn't find the name, "the fkejjow firds" nor the worm's name, "the Nitor vermis". You are genious, Beth! You created your original magical creatures. I like them both very much.

Reading the episode, the worms surface from the cave walls and glow various neon colors, I remembered fireflies and sea fireflies. I enjoyed Luna's thought about the colors of luminescent worms and Rolf's pondering about his favorite color and Luna.

The plot that Luna doesn't mind her injury facing the discovery of the rare magical creatures, is amazing! You put some romances here and there ingeniously, which leads us to the end non-stop!

Rolf couldn't stop falling love with her but he tasted her blood and recongnized the copper as a scientist and made a mental note about the yellow nitor vermis, which is awesome, too!


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Review #6, by StarFeatherHurricane Luna: They Meet in a Tree

26th July 2016:
Hi, Beth! I came back here for your Hot Seat Review!

Ha ha ha, Hurricane Luna! Nice! It's entirely different from Molly's sorrowful story I read yesterday. This story has cheerful and comical mood. It's entertaining. Newt Scamander's centric movie is coming, so I had much expectation before I read this story. You didn't betray me. Rolf's observation scene is very interesting. I wonder what the new species, the fkejjows are like. Did J.K.Rowling write about them? I have to check them in Newt Scamander's book later.

The timing when Luna entered is super! His activity as a scientist, observing firds boosts anticipation for a romance, even if Luna's dressing looks funny. Observing a mating pair raising its young from a hatchling hinted that their romance (Rolf&Luna) will also begin. Rolf can't forget her. Your description about her and their first encounter is super! The visual scene remains in our mind for long. I could imagine his confusion at her annoying chat and behaviour (a kind of stalking). I love the scene with Rolf falling from the tree the best.

I'll be back soon.


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Review #7, by StarFeatherFull of Grace: It's Better This Way.

25th July 2016:
Hi, Beth! I came here for Hot Seat Review!

Fluttering snow flakes are beautiful for children or lovers or happy family, but for the people who has lost their dearest one, they symbolize transitory life, just like they melt away soon.

If Fred was alive, Molly would have been supposed to prepare the dinner plate for him, but she had to remember the fact again, the feeling, "missing", "sinking" and "claw for solid ground", they are exact words for her emotion.

"Her eyes flick again to the window beyond and her mind races to thoughts of what his grave must look like, covered in heaps of the fluffy interloper", this sentence is a very heartaching expression.

"The bright colors that dotted the tips of the trees reminded her of his hair and sunny-yellow humor." I like this description of Fred. It's so beautiful and sad. And more beautiful and sad expressions continued in sequence, "the presence of the first snowing just one more reminder that everything seems to move on. Everything except Molly. She is stuck".

It is so painful, the words, "Another season that Fred would miss, the landscape reflects the barren insides of her soul. White. Blank nothingness. No life."

The repetition of the song lyrics, "I know I can love you much better than this." is very impressive. She knows she has to get over the loss of Fred but she can't. You expressed her sorrow so effectively and so poetically.

What Molly talked to Fred in her mind about the details of her cooking and the other news is so moving. (I like the idea 'The Quibbler is overtaking The Prophet in Sales'. :D )

The most beautiful,sorrowful and my favorite descriptions you wrote here are, two spots where you put your soul into the words about Arthur and Molly.

And the last scene is so touching, all Weasley children with Harry and Hermione, entered.


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Review #8, by StarFeatherThe Next Great Adventure: Chapter 6: A Pitch Black Dungeon

25th July 2016:
Hi, Kaitlin. One more Hot Seat Review!

I'm excited to be back here again with much expectation for Harry's adventure. this chapter is written from Dobby's POV, I guess you might consider how to begin this chapter deeply. I think it went well.

It's great you described how Harry could march to his destination faster than Dobby. We wait for their next movement in breathless. Then you didn't betray our expectations. Bellatrix Lestrange had been waiting for Harry to delude him. I'm amazed by your detailed description of her and her lie about Sirius. The plot is awesome, Kaitlin! You portrayed his spiritual darkness and awakening from the illusion very well.

I like the way of Dobby's thinking about Bellatrix. You wrote his observation of her very well. You did a great job to voice out "Hate the crime, but forgive the person who committed the crime."

The description of the last scene is also fabulous to be continued to the next chapter.


Author's Response: Hey Kenny!

Thank you so much for following up on the hot seat. That was very kind and honorable of you to do and I know it meant a lot to the people who had earned them.

I'm so glad you liked the description of Bellatrix. She's one of my favorite characters, so I always enjoy writing her.

I felt like for Harry to really find peace, he had to find a way to let go of his hatred for her. I think if you forgive a person, it doesn't mean you've forgotten what they've done, but it does mean you're moving on from it.

Thanks again! I hope you'll have a chance to read the next chapters as I post them.


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Review #9, by StarFeatherThe Rules of Motherhood: Mrs. Prewett

24th July 2016:
Hi, Sam! One more Hot Seat Review!

It will be disapponting for Arthur to know Molly and her mother couldn't share the pleasure of new life, his first child. I wish Molly will tell her pregnancy to her husband ASAP, when she's ready.
Marraige is cooperation between a wife and a husband.

It's interesting that you set Molly's mother as a type of a person who is an example to young people what they should not be. On bad term with her mother, Molly determined to find her own way to be an ideal mother. To begin with that, she picked up her little book to write down her emotions. It's impressive how Molly started writing again.


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Review #10, by StarFeatherChild of the Hunt: The Journey Begins: Witch Hunt

24th July 2016:
Hi, Alexis. One more Hot Seat Review.

I'm very impressed by Celtic cross and Gaelic words. I wonder if Alexis and her mother are from Celtic blood or a kind of druidic clan.

This story is very interesting, not only with J.K.Rowling's magical world but also your original native American's magic. The Yunwi's scene is very thrilling. I hope the Yunwi could help all students safely.

Ah! Bella hunted them. She's really charismatic. HP fanfic authors can't resist to let her enter in the story. Your description of action scene is super!

Anne's last words, "...daughter...the key..." is very intriguing. And who is the man Anne whispered to Alexis urgently? Is he Snape? (I saw his face on banner). I googled "Do croŪ is ea ť". Does it mean "It is your heart"?


Author's Response: Hi Kenny!

You have no idea how excited your review has made me. You've picked up on clues that no one else has pointed out! Excellent! There are a lot of clues in this story, things that weave in and out of the tale like a bright thread in a tapestry. Half the fun is finding out which ones were important and how.

Alex and her mom don't necessarily have Celtic blood, but someone obviously taught Adhara to speak it.

And yes, Bella. She is a fun character to play with! Determined, clever, a little crazy, and totally committed to Voldemort - who can resist?

Thank you for making my day with your review!


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Review #11, by StarFeatherThe Next Great Adventure: Chapter 5: Worry

23rd July 2016:
Hi! I came back for Hot Seat Review more!
The scene, the perspective were changed entirely from Harry's to his guardians. It's interesting Dumbledore still seem to do some controls over Harry's afterlife.

You capture each characteristic very well. It's impressive Harry's parents and the other guardians get together and worry about his afterlife. I wonder if our afterlife are like that.If it is true, our afterlife may be not so bad compared with the imagination worrying heaven or hell.

I knew it! My opinion is just the same as James'. So Harry has to face Voldemort again, right?
I'm eager to read what will happen to Harry next!


Author's Response: Hey Kenny!

Thank you for another amazing review!

Dumbledore is definitely in a control position even in the afterlife, however, I think it's a bit different than it was in life. There's a bit of a twist coming in regards to that, but I won't spoil it here.

I personally don't know what to believe, but I liked the idea of people reuniting with their loved ones and if anyone deserves it, Harry does.

I won't say with certainty, but it would be rather predictable if Harry had to face Voldemort again, wouldn't it?


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Review #12, by StarFeatherThe Rules of Motherhood: Dreamer, Writer, Mother

23rd July 2016:
Hi, Sam! I came back for Hot Seat Review!

I didn't expect you would write about Molly before she brought up her seven children. It's very new to see how she felt or thought for herself not for children. Your story about her dream to become a writer is so beautifully written and I like it. Especially, I like the scene when she found the box which contained her favorite things. We can see how young Molly had a dream for the future, how she spent time at Hogwarts and we smile at her mind scenery. It is very understandable that she got confused at her pregnant. It's not fair for women to be forced to give up their dreams temporarily. But you seem to have vision how to write about her life from here. Will she really quit her first dream? Or will she find wonderful things instead? It's very intriguing.

These are very impressive expressions: she wanted to be beautiful, she wanted to be loved, she wanted to be remembered.

I guess those phrases will be the key to your story.

I'll be back!


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Review #13, by StarFeatherChild of the Hunt: The Journey Begins: Welcome to My Life

23rd July 2016:
Hot Seat Review from Far East!

Wow, Alexis, it's amazing you wrote about American Wizarding school. We don't know or can't find any of them, what they are like, from J.K.Rowling's books. I really like the idea that Native American magical world people know a lot about Potions. I've read somewhere about the story Native Americans had knowledge about herbs in America. It's also interesting the main character was brought up by a half-Cherokee stepfather. And she could do Animagi, wolf! It reminds me of Tonks, whose mother was Andromeda Black. It's very intriguing, Nymphadora's patronous was a wolf. The letters of the tabloid were changed to the magical articles from Muggle ones. It's very impressive.
Each description is awesome: the northern coast of Maine (Oh, I love the place, even I felt like I could smell the seabreeze) , a permanent portkey hidden old Nabbie's Tavern, Gringotts branch in the underground district in Salem. "Alex made a mental note in her nascent ars memoriae of the song titles for her upcoming Alternative Divination class", the songs you chose, "Witch Hunt", "Highway to Hell" and "Gimme Shelter" are nice, too! Her word "Sweet" slipped softly when she saw her motorcycle fondly, which let me remember Sirius Black.


Author's Response: Hello Kenny!

When I originally wrote this story, I wanted to explore different aspects of how things aren't the same everywhere in the wizarding world (that would be boring and unrealistic!) The American school, the Native American influences, the shopping district in Salem - it's all very unlike the UK setting we're familiar with.

And yes, Native Americans do have a history of knowing about herbs and remedies. Each tribe has a rich culture and history. I readily acknowledge that this story doesn't do their ways justice.

As for Alex's changing into a wolf, well,I wouldn't necessarily assume that she's is an Animagus. Yes, she can become a wolf, but there's a different reason for that.

I have to thank my beta, narcissablack, for help with placing AMA off of Maine as well as the idea for using Salem. She's familiar with that region.

Ah, you picked up on some of the familial similarities! Yes, Alex is a Black through and through. She may have been raised in America, but those family traits keep coming through. Just wait until she actually arrived in England!

Thanks again for the review!


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Review #14, by StarFeatherThe Next Great Adventure: Chapter 4: The Weighing Of The Wand

23rd July 2016:
Hi, Kaitlin! I'm happy to be back to one of your best works for Hot Seat Review! Though I like the previous chapters, I was very impressed with this chapter. Poor Dobby, he was afraid of Thestrals because he had never seen them until he died. It's very heartwarming to see Harry cared about Dobby and told him not to feel scary and explained how they wouldn't do any harm on him.
I'm also very moved by the scene when Harry's wand was scaled. His tension before his turn was described very well. We couldn't wait what would happen next. The picturesque descriptions about Harry's whole life, memories and emotions are all beautiful. I like Dobby's words, 'Life is a good thing, sir.' You did a great job, Kaitlin! I guess all readers who stop by this chapter, will be moved by the scene.
On the other hand, the last scene is eerie. I'm afraid Dobby and Harry have to meet Bellatrix and Voldemort. I can't wait to see what will happen next!


Author's Response: Hi Kenny!

Thanks again for helping everyone to get involved in the hotseat reviews! It was super nice of you to do that and I know people really appreciate it.

I'm so happy to hear that you enjoyed this chapter. It was one of my favorites to write. I put a lot of thought into the weighing of the wand ceremony, so I'm glad that it worked well.

I can't say here, but you'll see if you keep reading!

Thanks again!


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Review #15, by StarFeather19226: 19226

20th July 2016:
Hi, Sam! Iíll send you late late Hot Seat Review from Far East!
I don't know why, but my thought traveled this RL, internet world when I read your story. There are plenty of fun tools like, twitter, facebook, tumblr and so on. When you hit the words, someone makes response, just like Ginny and Tom. Itís fun to chat, but it's weird sometimes that you confess your secret to someone who you canít see its substance. But it's a kind of healing process and to release her adolescent conflict for Ginny to talk to Tom and confess her secret on the diary. The repetition of the same phrases sounds beautiful and scary at the same time. I felt an eerie shadow of Tom Riddle which dominated her mind. The stamped bracelet, the number Pt. 19226, the name of the disease and the Date of Admission are so shocking, which means Ginny couldn't recover from mental destruction in spite of Harryís effort to rescue her.

I'll be back.


Author's Response: Hey Kenny =)

Thanks for topping by with a review - no worries at all about the delay.

I'm afraid I don't fully understand what you're trying to say in the first part of you review, but I'm glad this story made real world connections for you.

Of course Harry rescued her physically, she didn't die. But there's a lot more to trauma than that, and I always felt the series overlooked that in Ginny's character. She went through an intense, horrible ordeal at a young age that not only but her in mortal danger, but made her a stranger in her own mind. That's not something that a person just gets over by being removed from danger, and I wanted to hint at how dark that could become.

Thanks for your review!


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Review #16, by StarFeatherChild of the Hunt: The Journey Begins: Prologue (In a New York Minute)

19th July 2016:
Hi, Alex! I came back to your very narrative fanfic world,
bc...Hot Seat Review! (sorry I didn't notice the event has still been going on. I suppose J and the other left staffers are working hard to set it up.)

I've missed this. From the beginning, the story started in a very dark mood. Wait, was Alex's mother a Death Eater? It's very intriguing.

The American Magical Academy sounds cool, but, why was it destroyed? Oh, no, her mother was tortured and killed. Poor Alex.
I kept reading with breathless attention until she got on board safely feeling in the same way as she did. Her bustling thought of the best way to disguise herself made me thrilled. Cobweb detecting charm sounds cool, too.
Wow, the soothing sounds of Enya! I love it, too. I'll come back ASAP.



Author's Response: Hi Kenny!

I didn't know about the Hot Seat either until I discovered some reviews (I'm not on Twitter). It was quite the surprise!

Oh, and you've picked the story I'm closest to - the one that I started back in 2008, but abandoned after two years. The is the story that drew me back to HP fanfic after a prolonged absence. Alex's tale never really left my mind or heart, and so I've begun to rewrite it.

Since this story predates the recent writings of JKR, you'll notice my version of the American school is different. The tale is completely AU - there are things that are very much non-canon. At the same time, much is the same.

But yes, the start of this story is right in the middle of Alex trying to escape to safety. It is tense and you don't quite know what's going on other than the Death Eaters are after her. I promise events get explained, though.

Thanks for the unexpected review.


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Review #17, by StarFeatherThe Department: Chapter Two

17th July 2016:
Hi, Kayla! Thank you so much for making an entry for Aurorís Tale Story Challenge Season 2! I know how youíve been struggling to write this. As Iíve read your other stories, I think I understand your canon. Every time I read your story, your Sirius breathes freely, sometimes hard, his repressed rage, impulse and his sadness, all of them are very artistic explosive creation. Now, Iíll analyze your story as an Aurorís Tale.

Chapter 1 : Readers are drown to your descriptions about Aurorís office unconsciously. We can visualize how Sirius and James deal with desk works. Wanted posters, stacks of files, the smell of the ink and the ďIntelĒ stamp. We donít see a high-flown sentences here at all. You have a compact style but a loud color that attracts us immediately. The work is technically outstanding. Your plot was targeted at the mystery, ĎRegulus Black presumed deadí. Big impact for the main character and readers anticipate how Sirius would solve the problem after getting over his own agony.

Chapter 2: This chapter is about the main characterís agony in strong contrast to the previous chapter. Some of us remember you are the queen of agony. You looked into Sirius Blackís matter more deeply: How long he had been forced to face his notorious prejudiced mother and he had been caught between his affection and hate towards blood prejudice and misunderstanding his own identity. You chose to write Animagus to embody healing. Readers feel relieved when they read Padfootís behaviors after stifling grief. You tried to reveal how Sirius had been distressed by his own depressing family history and how he would get over with it by planning a new scheme. The phrase sends us a powerful message, ďSirius has a gleam in his eye reminiscent of the manic look he always used to have about him while planning pranksĒ. Letís read and see how he will fight for his justice as a true Gryffindor!


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Review #18, by StarFeatherFirst Hand Experience: Chapter 2: Hurried Goodbyes

16th July 2016:
Hi, Kaitlin! Thank you again for making entries for Auror's Tale Story Challenge Season 2!

The beginning scene gives us the image that Harry came back home starving and wrapped with the smell of roast chicken and potatoes. Besides Ginny's appearance adds the heartwarming and romantic mood before the departure for his mission. He had no time to sit and taste her delicious food, but she is surely Molly's daughter, she could pack them for Harry briskly. Thanks to her help, he can go mission free of worry. We can't stop wishing Harry be safe for Ginny.

As usual, the description about dishes is super. My mouth is watering like Harry. Please let me know when you are ready for the next chapter.


Author's Response: Hi Kenny!

Thanks for dropping by to read this!

I definitely enjoyed describing Harry's relationship with Ginny. The two of them strike me as a good balance for each other. And of course, Ginny would send him with food for dinner!

I'm glad you liked the food description!


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Review #19, by StarFeatherThe Trials: Chapter 4

16th July 2016:
Hi, again. I came back to see how Harry, Ron and Violet would accomplish their task to get Dolohovís signature. Theia, you really did a great job on writing action scene! It was thrilling when I read the interrogating scene! I like the way you wrote how Harry walked through the prisoners to Dolohovís cell. His mind movement reminded us of his hard past life.

Ronís reluctance to stay at Azkaban is well written. And Violetís smart observation and her quick response against Henry is outstanding. I wonder what grudge Henry had against Dolohov. Imagining adversarial relationship between Dolohov and Greyback is horrible. Iím very intrigued with the development you will set up from here.

Please enjoy writing this story, Theia! Iím waiting for the next update as well.
Thank you again for making entries for Aurorís Tale Story Challenge Season 2.


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Review #20, by StarFeatherDetermination: The First Day

16th July 2016:
Hi, Kaitlin! Thank you for making two entries for Aurorís Tale Story Challenge Season 2.
Iím so excited to see summary and Kaylaís banner. Before reading chapter 1, many visions popped in my mind like a revolving lantern.
I like the idea Augusta Longbottom is the first female Auror ever in Wizarding Britain. You set the reporter, Martha Skeeter from the Daily Prophet, it added seasoning to your story, too. I could envision Augusta marched to the entrance of Ministry through flashes from magical cameras and tomatoes! I could hear roars from the crowd and imagined one of red tomatoes nearly hit her, like a movie.

This story is very promising. Augusta Longbottom would have to face male supremacy in those days. You portrayed how severe circumstance it was very well. The scene when the grumpy security guard examined her wand is super! Iím eager to see how Augusta will silence the old hard heads with her talents and her determination. Please update this ASAP!


Author's Response: Hi Kenny!

Isn't Kayla's banner so lovely? It really was perfect for this. :)

Poor Augusta will unfortunately have quite a bit to overcome as she makes history as the first female auror. Don't worry though, Augusta is tough and she's going to show them exactly why she was chosen.

Thanks for encouraging me to write this story Kenny! I hope to get back to updating it soon!


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Review #21, by StarFeatherCircle of Silence: Three

15th July 2016:
Hi, Theia! Thank you for making two entries for Auror's Tale Story Challenge Season 2. And thank you for your suggestion for this challenge since last year on twitter. :)

It was new to read the investigatory work from the start. Not a few people (including me ;D) write a lot action scenes, like dueling with the remaining Death Eaters. (Yes, I can feel like you will set the scene later, I like the episode Scorpius had been training himself.) It's thought and planned well to build up mystery accompanied by romance between Rose, Forensic Investigator and Scorp, private detective. Readers get intrigued with the theme,"the Wastelanders" and the horrible psychopath on the loose.

As we continue reading, we can expect the background of the incident will be revealed bit by bit, it's a very promising story. And you didn't forget to set Scorose ship in the story. Readers are going to enjoy both solving a riddle and romance development. At the same time, you focused on the weak of the society, which makes your story more profound and gripping. Please update as soon as possible.


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Review #22, by StarFeatherGreen With Envy: To Plug A Leak

13th July 2016:

Thank you for making an entry for Auror's Tale Story Challenge Season 2. I sent you a message via twitter about the way to know the result. I'll write a blog by the end of July.

From the beginning, I sensed the Asian taste-a large group of tiger lilies. Then you didn't betray my expectation. Is that Ninja arts you mentioned in the previous PM? It's great to read several Ninja arts plus the Chinese skill in English including Shozoku and Tabi. Harry and Ron clad in Ninja's clothes, wow, it's cool!

I'd like to watch them fight with the Death Eaters and Umbridge in the movie based on your wonderful one-shot. I like you set a pitfall for Harry and Ron, their signal coins. They are not perfect persons. The plot, the Head Auror vs. rookies is really interesting. Ah, finally Rita Skeeter had to face the fact that "Nengu no Osamedoki 年貢の納め時( her game was up)".

The way how Kingsley led his Aurors is also cool. Over all this one-shot is full of action and entertaining so that readers can enjoy this like watching movie.

I guess in your imagination, Harry and Ron became Aurors after their Quidditch career. I wish I could be back to other stories witten by you.


Author's Response: Hey, Kenny!
I'm very sorry that I have been so busy this summer and have neglected my writing and reviewing. I did receive your message and will definitely be joining up with the old gang as soon as my musical is done!

It's funny...I only realized the fact that Tiger Lilies are very Asian AFTER I posted the story. The reason I included them is that, as a young boy, I would hide in the very large patch of Tiger Lilies at our home. They were so tall and thick that no one could ever find me. It must have been a subconscious addition on my part.

As we discussed before, when we first met, I have read a lot about Ninjutsu and Japanese Mythology and love to add it into my stories, especially the Auror tales. I knew you would appreciate it.

You mentioned wanting to see the fight scenes in a movie. That's how I write envisioning the action (I studied quite a few different Martial Arts styles in my younger years) and then trying to describe what I see in my head.

Yes, I do see Harry and Ron as Aurors after their Quidditch careers. In my second novel, Have No Fear, you will see how and why that happens.

Thanks for the fantastic review and I will hopefully migrate in a month or two...I really miss everyone greatly!

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Review #23, by StarFeatherToward the Heights: Toward the Height

13th July 2016:
Hi, Slide. Thank you so much for your entry at Aurorís Tale Story Challenge Season 2. I got excited when I saw your entry on the thread at the forums.
Okay, Iíll put aside the emotions, Iíll leave review calmly.

You set a shocking murder scene at the beginning of the story and described in detailed how Ron had been suffering terrible mind pain from Aurorís job. Despite of Hermioneís understanding and care, nobody could heal his pain. Readers can guess the main character, Ron unwillingly killed the suspect for self-defense or to save the other, from hints you studded, the writing style is super. You didnít reveal everything who Ron saved in the first half, which let us intrigued very much and we canít stop reading to the end.

As we read through, we notice this is the story how Ron quit the Auror job. The conversations between Ron and his brother are well written. Ronís agonized face sipping tea at Georgeís shop rises in our mind clearly. His gloomy feelings are woven everywhere in this one-shot. This phrase speaks for his true feeling: ĎI gave up wanting to be the hero a long time ago.í You dig down his problem through his conversations with the people around him, Hermione, George, Ginny, his colleagues and Harry. And he made a decision by himself in the end, that decision was expressed previously mentioned figuratively: ĎShadows in the corners of his eyes, shadows that had crept around him all dayÖ, shrouds of darkness threatening to cast their shade not upon the days past. But days to come.Ē He accepted once to save the day, but he hated to save the minute as you mentioned.

The story reached its climax when you set the raid scene when Harry Potter had been a hostage. The descriptions until Ron found his best friend with the suspect, were impressive. We can portray each items in the suspectís room. And the description of the weather in Britain added the quiet and subdued but strong seasoning with a solitary hero, Harry Potter who would carry on his Auror job, which is the exact opposite way of Ronís future life.

The last scene was ended in the brighter way after Ronís mind struggle in the heavy darkness was cleared.Rreaders canít stop smiling at his last words, ĎIíd cook dinner.í
We feel happy remembering Hermioneís awkward cooking skills and Ron was Mollyís son.


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Review #24, by StarFeatherTo Steal Our Breath Away: The Beginning of a Case

10th July 2016:
Hi, Branwen! Thank you for making an entry! I enjoyed your story. It was very interesting from the start. I missed Karuizawa, the nature and the weather reading your story. It is very hot here now. I wish I could reading in a hammock feeling breeze pass by. Ogden is also a name for Firewhiskey, right? I hope you can update this ASAP.

Chapter 1: The story began in a very narrative way. Readers wait for mystery holding their breath. Writing style reminded us of J.K.Rowlingís. Each scene holds picturesque beauty. The nature let us imagine typical European or American country landscape including an apple tree and a hammock. But the benign scenery was turned to play horrific discord that resonated with the victimís mind movement. Though the author gave the readers a hint about her in the beginning, ĎJane Ogden would be at 1,530í, we wonder what secret she had kept having, who tried to threaten her.

Chapter 2: This chapter was written in a different way compared to the previous chapter, the training scene is also very unique, Occulmency lesson is not found so often in the other fanfictions. The war heroís second son seems to be good at it, which reminds us of his fatherís history and we expect our hero will enter soon. The author didnít betray us. Harry Potter is portrayed vividly and entertains us. The new character, ĎJohanna Greengrassí is introduced unobtrusively, and we can guess she will be a narrator through the coming story instead of the author. Her observation will guide us to the next generation world, too. We canít wait for the next chapter.


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Review #25, by StarFeatherLife Was Meant to Be Easy Now: From a Mother's View

19th June 2016:
Hi,Molly! Long time since I stopped by here before.
I came back again for #the LGBTQA Pride Review# hosted by TreacleTart.

I may like this chapter the best of your story, because, you described how parents care their children. I enjoyed and agreed with Ginny's inner mind movement at each scene. We worry about our child's dark face when he is in trouble, we wish his happiness. It doesn't have exception in any relationships. Most of us hope our child will be happy and find his or her best partner.

I don't know why, but reading Ginny's mind movement, I imagined your voice was talking to us. I felt your strong message and your affection towards any people in any situation. All people should be equal and be happy. Nobody has right to bash the other even if the one has the differnt point of view or tastes.


p.s. I like the scene when Harry helped Ginny at kitchen with his magic and Ginny read the Quidditch magazines on weekends.

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