I have to admit that I secretly read till chapter 6 without leaving a review... I was a little to curious to stop for the review box and type a few short words. But I felt really guilty about that and ended up going back to chapter 3 to leave a review. I promise to leave more on the other chapters as well.
I loved James' banter with his owl. *Giggles again just thinking about it*
I thought it was foolish, but also really sweet that he wanted to learn Ellie's timetable by heart. If a boy would do that for me...
It was really mysterious that Leo said: I have my reasons, that was one of the thinks that had me reading on without leaving a review. Than again I haven't found those reasons yet in the chapters to come... will you reveal them one day?
Lily acted like a little spoiled princess, but later I learn she's got more to her than meets the eye... that's one of the strange thinks about leaving a review for a chapter a few chapter passed where you are now... You get to know the characters in different light and find you were a little wrong on the first impression.
Anyways... nice chapter. I'll leave another review soon :)
MayaAuthor's Response: Gah! So yes, sorry this was my first story...so there are many errors.
Many, many, MANY errors.
I don't start really getting into anything until about the eleventh chapter, as weird as that sounds. I got really into developing my characters.
Right, well I'm off to sneak around and look at cat pictures on the internet! I'd love to hear what you have to say about the following chapters if you have the time to leave another review. Or you could just IM me. That works too. Report Review
Aw... James is a lovely character, it must be lots of fun to write him :)
Poor Ellie, she already has a hard time and on top of that comes a stupid rumour to make her even more uncomfortable. Though it is a far fetched rumour, I wouldn't have believed it, but I guess teenagers are a bit slower than me.
You were right to say this is a fun story, it has a bit of drama but not so much that I get frustrated with it (I can't really handle to much drama, it make me uncomfortable :P)
I'm really curious whether James and Ellie will end up together one day. I hope they will :)
Shall I tell you the part I liked the best?
I thought it was really funny when James started rolling around on the floor with laughter. I started giggling right in my cup of tea, which could have ended in a disaster... luckily it didn't.
that's it for today. maybe I'll leave you another review tomorrow, wouldn't that be nice?
MayaAuthor's Response: Hey Maya, welcome back to the rubbish!
James is alright. I shouldn't disclose who my favorite to write is...but its Scorpius. It'll become evident later on :)
I don't know what rumours teens pass along these days...I guessed...
Oh, it's about to get a whole lot more dramatic, my dear, dear Maya. A lot more. But..coming from me...I'm not sure if that's a "big deal." Oh well, let me know what you think when I drop it all on you in these next twenty-ish chapters.
We shall see about Jellie (sweet ship name, right?!)!!
Yes! Do tell! Heh, he's a riot! I'm a fan of James Sirius Potter. I need to stop writing about that kid someday...nope.
That would blow my mind. Not literally. I don't want to clean that junk up.
Right, weird response...it's really early in the morning over here. Sorry...
Jack Report Review
I can't believe I did not start reading this story yet, how come I never did? Can you tell me?
I don't know what made me read it now but I'm very happy I did, it's a lovely story, or at least the prologue is.
It must be hard to be a werewolf, losing control every month. I wouldn't wish that to anybody.
I spend my day in the sun and I did not drink enough, so now I've got a bit of a headache, but I'm determined to tell you that I'm going to read the rest of this story as well. It's funny and serious at the same time, with is quite a nice combination.
Now I must lay my hurting head on a pillow and sleep. Hopefully you'll hear more from me tomorrow.
MayaAuthor's Response: You're going to read this silly thing? Prepare to be blasted with fluffy nonsense! ;)
You probably haven't read this one because it's a bit on the teenage girly side. Let's be honest here. Oh well, these characters are my favorite. After the twenty chapters, you find yourself attached to the people you've created and are developing :P
Oh, get rest!
soapman333 Report Review
I have to say Lily frustrates me a little, why does she think she can go and order Stewart around, even if he is her boyfriend. Doesn't he get a say in things? She obviously thinks it's for the best, but is it really?
I felt really sorry for Stewart. It must be hard to not be able to say what you want to say.
I was really impressed that he decided to just go for what he wanted and take the beater position. He doesn't need more back bone, only someone to believe in him.
A little thing, I get really confused when you change the point of view in a chapter, I don't say you must change it or anything, just wanted you to know.
Anyway, nice to see a new chapter, that really planted a smile on my face. I've been smiling a lot today, it's such nice weather here and I'm out in the sunshine most of the time, but seeing a new chapter has been added to a story I like is a guarantee for a smile as well.
Nice to know you're keeping your end of the deal :)
MayaAuthor's Response: I'm disappointing myself with story, but it'll turn around...probably.
I just finished writing the next chapter for SUAKM, and, let me tell you, it's my absolute favorite. It'll definitely put a smile on your face (it's not fluffy, just funny), but knowing that me adding chapters makes you smile makes my whole existence.
That's probably the biggest compliment anyone could give me, thank you.
Anyways, so the story: Lily is supposed to be frustrating :P I'm going to give her an even softer side in this next chapter.
Yay, you're reactions are spot on! (not that I'm trying to manipulate you or anything...)
I'm slowly getting out of the POV shifts...I just love them so much, but I use them as a crutch in my writing. Just like I use flashbacks! I need to get away from those things.
Thanks, as always, for being so wonderful Report Review
This was really a great chapter. I got all excited reading it. I was a little disappointed at the disruption, because I wanted to know more about the genetics of Louis.
But then again the thing that happened in Dorset is part of the plot and I want to know what happened there as well.
And what happened to Louis?
All those unanswered questions make me want to read on. You're building the tension up high!
I liked that the Ravenclaws were allowed to visit their friends in the Slytherin dormitories, and it's nice to see shy little Scorpius bloom up. He needs a few friend to break out of his shell.
I hope you're not frustrated with my very very late review... I'll try and make them a little more frequent from now on, but I can't promise anything.
MayaAuthor's Response: All in good time, my friend, all in good time.
I can promise you will start to get a few answers... or at least some recurring hints... before too long. Report Review
Another great chapter! The plot thickens and I'm really very sorry I have so little time to read now. I hope you don't mind my tardiness, I have a lot to finish before next weekend.
Oh, I'm so excited that Scorpius is finally part of the group, I was really waiting for that because I knew he's a good kid. He's a bit shy, isn't he? I like that. It makes him very cute and likable.
Miranda's got her own problems and things going on. I wonder if she will turn out just like her mom or find her own way. She could really be something, I suppose.
This will be it for today. Hopefully I'll find a minute or two for you tomorrow.
MayaAuthor's Response: You need a character like Miranda. It gets a bit boring if everyone's agreeing with one another all of the time. Explosive rivalry's much more fun to write... Report Review
Here is your review,
I have to say this story makes me a little sad. I'm sure that was what you were going for with this.
There's a lot of emotion going on in it.
If you asked me, Albus wouldn't swear. It's like you reversed the roles of Albus and Aberforth, a little. In my opinion Aberforth would be the one to swear and be rude and nut Albus.
This could be a part of a bigger story, maybe a mamory of some kind. If you want.
I hope you thought my review was helpful.
xAuthor's Response: Thank you for the review! I was thinking of making this into a longer story, or possibly just having a second chapter where we would see what Aberforth wants most. I guess I'll look into it more. Thank you. Report Review
That's a lot of information for such a short chapter! Not that that's a bad thing, I mean you already made sure we liked the characters in the first chapter, now giving them some bachground is really helpfull to understand the whole situation.
I must say I kind of saw it coming that Roxanne likes Stewart. It's a little shocking that Lily doesn't. What wrong with that girl :P
Hugo jumping over the table formed a funny image in my head. I can just see him crashing over the bread and planting his knees in the butter dish befoore tumbling to the ground with the crushing sound of breaking china all around. (my fantasy goes runnig wild from time to time.)
It must not be easy to stutter, I can't imagine how irritated I would be with myself if everytime I try to say something I have to anticipate the fact that maybe it won't come out. It's a little like being dyslectic. Everybody can read and write and you just can't get it. I was really frustrated when I was younger and I just couldn't read word with more then ten letters. Lucky for me I finally got it.
I have to go make a math test now (another thing that doesn't come easy to me, I'm afraid)
I like the story, so keep writing and I'll keep ready, okay?
MayaAuthor's Response: Ah yes, I did bombard with information. I should have expanded and made this two chapters :/
It was a bit obvious, eh? Well, I certainly won't take it in the normal direction. *insert evil laugh here*
Hugo crashing over the table is my favorite part about this chapter! (I usually put my favorite parts in the chapter summary), but I also like when Lily pours syrup all over Roxy. Hilarious.
Stewart is similar to Ellie in this aspect. Both are trying to overcome a physical problem...wow, I just realized how similar those two are. Now I've got to put something in to make them two different individuals.
Maths test? How horrible! It doesn't come easy to me either, no worries there.
Yes! It's a deal :D Report Review
I happened to stumble across your stroy whilst checking stories I reviewed and I remembered liking this one and without second thought I started reading the second chapter and then I was really confused because I had kind of forgotten about the dead people thing... I smacked myself in the head a second later, that was the moment I remembered. So yeah...
Now on to your chapter, man I laughted so hard! Regulus was kind of hilarious! I mean wifi in heaven?? And what's with the kitchen talk? TTYL? Seriously??? What? :P
I had a lot of fun reading it and then watching the people aroung me cast me worried glances because I was rolling around on the floor (not literally, I composed myself)
Really only thinking about it makes me smile again.
Just when I thought things were going to go serious Ginny walks in. I would have been rather shaken when the ghost of Regulus had said TTYL to me, But Ellie tops it all. Ginny was really cool.
Do I even make sense? I hope i do. I just really wanted to get my point across, which is: I like the chapter a lot. Please update as soon as you possibly can!!!
MayaAuthor's Response: Happy to see you came back for another read!
One of my aims with Regulus was to get a laugh or two out - so really happy to hear that was the case! He's a great character to write, and if I were in his situation, I'd wish to handle it the way he does. He comes back later in the story, and if you think you like him now - just you wait!
Ginny is amazing. That is all. All arguments, ever are invalid.
And there should be an update soon! Report Review
I see what you mean about the many plot lines that all seem to go their own way. How many are weaving togehter now, 3 or 4? Maybe they will all come together in the end?
I think it's nice because it really makes me want to read on, but I don't think there should be more story lines, it would get a little complicated that way.
You asked if Nathan was to flawless, I don't think he is. He didn't have an easy start in the story, very scared and still a bit timid. You could try and keep that bit in, since it is really what makes him so adorable.
I can say all this, but since you already wrote the next 10 chapters it won't make much of a difference...
It's great that Connor and Charlie met each other, so they don't have to be sad and friendless all the time. I'm guessing there is more to that story, though.
Does the van have something to do with the muggles that were in Diagon Alley?
I realise that this review is a little bit all over the place, forgive me since it is already 00:20 over here. I'm just a little bit tired.
MayaAuthor's Response: I promise there are no more plotlines. Connor and Charlie's story is the last of the new ones!
I managed to scare myself yesterday when I wasn't paying attention properly walking down that very road, when a white van went past... funny how the human brain works. Report Review
Haha, a table full of stoned Hufflepuffs, that must be great fun :)
You were worried of nothing, in my opinion this chapter is written excitingly enough to keep my attention to it. It got to see Astoria's few of the world a bit, which is quite interesting.
She's got a bit of a crush on Theodore, doesn't she?
You know, it always puzzled me, why is lord Voldemort so forgiving to the Malfoy family. He expects them to fail and still he lets them live when they do... while others or killed for merely bringing bad news.
Just a thought that came to me while reading, I wanted to share it.
It's made very clear in the letter from their mom how they have to balance to keep the right frineds in the right places. It's a dangerous game they play in the world of the Deaht Eaters. I wouldn't want to be involved.
Tor's image of her sister was really something. I feel some sister rivalry there.
You may certainly re-request whenever you like.
MayaAuthor's Response: Aha, I thought so!! Those poor Hufflepuffs.
I'm so glad that you liked the chapter! And identified her feelings for Theo. :) Sisterly rivalry between Daphne and Astoria is definitely present, and it's good to hear that the tensions between them and the complicated social lives they lead come through.
Your thought about the Malfoys is certainly interesting! Perhaps it's because he knows that they love each other, and can therefore threaten to hurt one of their loved ones and therefore have power over the others? I.e. threatening to kill Draco's parents if he doesn't succeed in his bidding. But then again Voldemort doesn't really understand love... hmm.
Thank you so much for another great review and the speedy response!! :) I'll definitely be re-requesting. Report Review
This is the chapter I read last before I desided it wasn't fair to not leave you any reviews, even though I liked the story so much that it was impossible to stop reading. After this my reviews will be without a knowlegde of what is coming.
I like the bits you wrote about the other boys, the muggle boys. It must be hard to 'lose' your friend and not knowing where they are and how to reach them.
I didn't really have friends when I was younger but I can imagine it to be difficult.
It's great that they wrote back, I think Nathan is an awesome kid. He forgave Charlie just like that. Not many children that age would be able to do so. I think I migh have, but I was very forgiving child.
Daniel wrote a very small letter to his best friend. I quess it's not easy to write and say nothing of impotance (because that would reveal way to much)
Want me pay attention to certain things in the next chapter(s)?
MayaAuthor's Response: Do you think Nathan's "too nice" at the minute? I know he's had a lot of challenges so far, and he's a character I like a lot, so I'm a little wary that he's not flawed enough.
I hope the sections about the muggle boys seemed like they fitted the rest of the storyline and didn't feel tacked on / incongruous.
Thanks again for all reviews :-) Report Review
Yeah, they really are friends now. That's what they deserve to be.
You put in a bit af a mystery here. What happened in the Leaky Cauldron, Muggles? Very exciting. It immediatly got my attention and now I have to know what is going on. You wouldn't write it if it weren't somehow important to the story...
Miranda really is her mothers daughter, I saw it in the last chapter and here you see it again. Trying to look important be putting others down. That's really Rita's style, she inheritate that alright.
I liked the bit with Theo and Greg, it's shows how much Greg is involved with his students. I think he's a great teacher and a very good head of house.
MayaAuthor's Response: You'll get used to the Daily Prophet and its unique brand of journalistic integrity. That's all I'm saying for now... whilst Miranda is of course an absolute delight to be around. She is quite fun to write, though, it's boring writing characters who are all friends all the time. Not that I usually have that problem. Report Review
This was a great chapter. It was great to see the Slytherin boys finally let go of their strange vendeta and got friends. It was amazing to see that Nathan has indeed got more up his sleeve than you'd think when you first see him. He's actually quite brave and very forgiving.
Greg must be very pleased that the boys are finally a team. That will bring some peace and quiet to his study, or once.
You make those little boy wheep quite often, which really is something they do a lot at that age, I've noticed. That makes it very realistic for me. I guess some people might think that it's weird for eleven year olds to cry that much (those who don't see them daily) but they are still really young. I think most of them are quite a bit homesick as well.
I suppose it must be really hard to be away from your parents when you're still so small.
I think you're doing a great job with this story.
MayaAuthor's Response: You'd want Nathan on your side in a crisis, wouldn't you? He'd not stop trying until he couldn't physically do any more. Think you could probably hear Greg's sigh of relief in Glasgow.
Homesickness is something that I don't think gets tackled sufficiently in HP or many of the fanfics - it hits young kids hard, and they get tired, and emotional, and they snap. Particularly when you ask them awkward questions. Report Review
First think I thought when I read this was poor, poor Louis. He's a nice kid and still everyone is trying to distroy that. First his cousin, than the other Ravenclaws then his other cousin and the other boy from his own house. It's really unfair, what has he ever done?
I alway get worked up when kids are bullying each other, when I'm teaching and it happens in my class it makes me rather sad. It's so hard to stop it, because the bully usually doesn't listen to anyone. The kid that is being bullied won't come to you for help and the rest of the class in either on the team of the bully or to scared to do something about it. I find it really hard to break that. I still have a whole year to learn how to do that (luckily!).
Back to your story though: I loved that Alexander and Toby desided to try and stand up for their friend even if they couldn't really stop it. That's a big desision to make but it makes a lot of difference.
Albus is really just trying to be as horrible as he can, now is he? To both his cousins.
I love how Sam is trying to make Louis and Nathan feel welcome and wanted in the house. It's obvious he had to suffer through the prejudice of being in Slythering when he was growing up. He's a good kid too, I think.
MayaAuthor's Response: Bullying. A word that always makes you wince as an educator... put simply, there's no easy way to stop it particularly as teachers' influence tends to have absolutely no impact on something like this... a point I think Greg touches on later in proceedings.
There really is only one fail-safe way to cut this out, and it's to have a class/school culture where the social leaders / most popular kids make it clear that they're not interested in bullying others, whether that's by standing up for victims or other means. However, the alpha characters are often such as they are because others do what they want to do, with the exclusion that follows if they don't...
If there was a magic wand someone would have found it by now. Report Review
What a start for a first lesson. Way to get those first years interested in the class and show them how much fun it's going to be. I liked it, a lot!
If Rose had me worried before she really got me now. What's wrong with her? Is it dissapointment that she's not with them in the same house, or just purely the fact that no-one can tell her off anymore and she doesn't have to look like a perfect princess all the time? I'm sure she will learn her lesson later on in the story (I did not read it yet but still)
Poor Louis, now not only Al is picking on him but Rose as well. He's got it tough and he's really a nice boy. They all are under the surface.
MayaAuthor's Response: Certainly more interesting than my first lessons usually start off. You can't really throw things at children in maths lessons, though. Compasses hurt. I tend to give them unanswerable questions and blow their minds that way.
Afraid it's going to get even worse for Louis before it gets better... Report Review
Oh, I really like Neal. He sounds like a very good teacher to me. I wish my history teacher had made the subject this interesting. I like history, but the way she told i it was just a bunch of dates and names, which is really a shame, because it's very interesting what happened in the past, and why :)
Rose's attitude towards her cousins is really bothering me. That girl has to get a good lecture on tolerance. I mean, her mother is the one pleading for equal treatment of both magical beings and wizards. Where does her intolerance come from?
Maybe her mother kept her down too much when she was younger.
The bullying of Albus bothers me too. (I know it will be okay later but still...) It's getting worst. I think I know where it's coming from. He's an insecure boy that for the first time isn't overshadowed by his big brother, the freedom has gotten the better of him.. I guess.
I liked how Louis tried to make Nathan fly and how he eventually did, without realizing it.
I've got a soft spot for those boys at the moment.
MayaAuthor's Response: I strongly believe that you can make anything interesting if you teach it in the right way... and anything boring if you teach it badly. Quite frightening how much of an influence we have really, and makes you think about those days you've taught awful lessons because you've been in a bad mood. Anyway...
I think what we're seeing with Rose is a reaction against being Little Miss Perfect as a child, and also a great deal of her father's stubborn streak. Report Review
Ow, the tension, who's going to be in which house? It really had me going and I wasn't surprised that Al and Dan were in Slythering. Lious didn't surprise me either after Nathan was placed there. It's was Nathan that surprised me the most.
I think it was a clever idea of prof. Bennet to go down to the dorms and talk to the boys on their first night there. I mean, we're dealing with very nervous eleven year old boys here. It only makes sense to see if they are okay.
It's good that Nathan and Louis were friends again. If Louis had to suffer through the next chapters all alone he would have been very misserable. I like Nathan, he's obviously scared of almost anything to do with magic or people or anything really, but still he sees he was worng to leave Louis on his own. It shows that he's got character. He's really a lot braver than he thinks he is.
mayaAuthor's Response: It's not actually the first night that's usually the hardest, cause adrenaline gets them through that, but the second... or the first Monday... that triggers the homesickness. Unless of course there's been a reason for the child to feel alone and isolated.
Nathan has more about him than he realises, but there are a few reasons why his self-esteem is shot to pieces right now. Report Review
As I said earlier I aready read ahead, too impatient to leave a review, but no worries, I leav them now.
In this chapter I really enjoyed that Greg teased the kids a bit with that walking through the wall thing. It made me laugh, it is an absurd thing to do when you think of it, who walks through a wall?
It worried me a bit when Albus started to be so mean to his cousin. It was the first time I though he might become a bully, and I really don't wish for him to become that. It's not unheard of with children that are really insecure. They do either sit back and try to be invisible or try to make people look at others.
Since I read the next chapters I now know what's coming, but when I was reading this I was really a bit shocked. I mean, those boys are family, shouldn't they be nicer to each other? What's gotten into that shy boy we met back in the second chapter?
that's it for now.
MayaAuthor's Response: Nail on head with Albus, I think. Very insecure and unsure if himself and looking to escape that fact by picking on someone else who's even less self-confident. "Him or me" isn't a difficult question for a little kid to answer. Report Review
It's a great start. After the prologue I couldn't wait for the story and see what you made of it. You did not dissapoint me. I'm very impressed at how natural you wirte the Slytherins. I had grown used to the fact that most people portait Slytherins as evil, which in not the case in your story at all. They grew up to believe different things, that's clear in the chapter.
You build up a lot of tension in the prologue that makes me want to keep on reading now to see where this is going. That chapter introduses us to the characters and toughts that are going to have their place through the story I guess. But still the tension from the prologue is lingering. That makes me super-curious and impatient to read more.
I think you wrote it really well. You didn't give away to much and still gave out some important information for the readers to know.
MayaAuthor's Response: Hello! I'm very glad to hear that you enjoyed the first chapter-I worried that it might be a little tame after the tension of the prologue. I hoped to demonstrate how the Slytherins are not naturally evil people, they've just been brought up with certain behaviours and ideals, which I try to challenge throughout the story.
It's great to hear as well that the tension from the prologue carries on! And I guess if you want to read on that is a good thing! I was worried about the first few chapters so getting this strong feedback is amazing. Thank you so much for reviewing, and I hope you don't mind that I'll be re-requesting! :) Report Review
Hey, here is your review.
I adore this story. It's very precious, almost breakable. There's This kind of tinkling of emotion through the story that makes my heart melt.
The joy a newborn brings to the world and to the hearts of the parents is something that I alwasy see as a sort of light. And you described that a bit. It's really beautiful how you did that.
The conversation between Percy and his mother was so honest and true. There was really no way he wouldn't call his daughter after his mother. Because after everything that happened he still loves his mother a lot. You can fell that in you words.
I wish there was more. But maybe it is just enough as it is. But I liked it so much I was really disapointed that it was over.
I hope you liked my review. I really like to read the story and write this for you :)
MayaAuthor's Response: Wow, I don't even know where to start. I'm so glad that you liked this. Thank you so much for your kind words.
I agree with you - the fact that he named her Molly really shows how much he loves his mother, and that's what I wanted to portray in this story. I'm glad to hear that you got that message ;)
I'm so glad that you liked it. It makes me happy to hear that it left you wantin more, but I didn't want to make it too long and lose the emotion of it. Also, it's a sort of addition to my other story, '19 years' (although this part is still far off in the future of that story).
Thanks again for reviewing, I appreciate it so much! Report Review
I'm really sorry for our little Daniel. It can't be easy for him to lose so many reasurance in so little time. I wouldn't pull through that very easy at that age. But I have the feeling he has been through a lot already. You kind of get the feeling his mother didn't really want him. Which is incredibly sad.
I like Theo, he's really a cool guy. I can see why Greg is friends with him.
I'm still not satisfied in my curiousity, every chapter answers a few questions but raises ten times as many. That means you really get me into the story, making me wanting to know more and more still. It keeps up the suspence too. Really, you're doing e great job.
MayaAuthor's Response: I think you've probably hit the nail on the head with that one. I don't think that Dan was ever on his mum's to-do lost. Greg and Theo have been friends since the first evening of their first year.
Afraid we have several more chapters of questions before we get any answers... although they do get Sorted in Chapter 7!
Sheriff Report Review
Hay, I didn't have the patience to wait for you to request the next chapter.
Aaw poor Daniel. That's not something an eleven year old should have to suffer through. What's his mother afraid of?
I think it good that Albus stood up to his cousin. It shows that he has got the nerves, he's just really insecure somethimes. It makes him very adorable.
Ow and Nathan, he's got a lot of magic in him, doesn't he. We can expact great things from him, when he learns how to control it.
What I really like about your story is that every chapter you see something new in the characters that enriches them. They are growing. That's really something.
I'd love to teach those boys, though they would be a handful. It would be a lot of fun to get to know them and find out their strength and teach them to use that. I think they are going ot make a very interesting first year.
I'll read an review the next chapter as well. I'm kind of hooked on this story now. I want to find out what houses the boys will be in, what Rose did, what's going to happen to Daniel now. That's all very interesting and you created the kind of cliff hanger that make me want to stop typing now and just read on. So that's what I'm going to do now.
MayaAuthor's Response: Ha! Clearly it's not too slow to draw readers in to the next chapters...! I get the feeling it's the gradual reveal of information that might be doing that? Be warned, there's more to learn about these boys; lots more: and indeed, more for them to learn about themselves.
Let me know if I need to re-request at any point. I am very much enjoying reading your reviews and getting a fresh perspective on the boys' personalities as I wind up to write the final few chapters.
Sheriff :) Report Review
Nice to see that Greg has learned from his first experience and did not spring the information all at once this time.
I was surprised by how good Louis was, since he had been difficult all morning. Maybe all the adult around him just don't expect him to be nice anymore and so he just lives up to their expectations.
The reaction of Nathan was predictable, If he had already had problems with it he wouldn't be one to admit he was abnormal.
I really like this chapter. It showed both more of Greg and of his students. The talk with Arthur in the end was enlightening. It showed a lot of the characters of the children. I feel like we got to know them a little better because of it.
It's nice to see the children do behave as children, a little insecure and willing to do as the grown ups tell them, if they have to.
I think you've created some really storng characters and I'm very curious how the story wil develop from here.
MayaAuthor's Response: Thanks :-)
My biggest worry with this is that things don't happen quickly enough at the beginning to draw readers along, but it seems like it's working okay as the main characters join the scene.
Great call about children living up (or down) to expectations, and well worth remembering when you go into teaching... they can even pick up on the subconscious fear that they might muck around. Not that I'm trying to scare you off the job...
Sheriff Report Review
I read this chapter the moment in was posted and I was under the impression that I left a review untill I read all my review and realised that I didn't. Which is really bad of me, so please forgive me!
To make sure I wasn't going to write total rubbish I read it again, which was fine, because I really like this chapter.
First thing I loved was Percy, his temper and his insecuraty. He really is someone that has to be saved. He thinks he has to save everyone, but really he is the one that needs saving. In this chapter it becomes so clear that something from the past is still hunting him. I want to know what it is. Why he is so tense and scared to be himself.
It's amazing that Audrey got free. She might not have a job anymore but she will no longer be treated as trash, which will be a huge improvement. I really just want her to be happy and that place wasn't going to make her happy.
You characters really got to me, and I'm felling for them. I feel this strong need for them to find peace. It's a little like when I was reading the last Harry Potter book. In the end all I really wanted was for Harry to have a happy and quiet live.
I guess what I'm saying with a lot of words is: I love this story, please please please come back to it soon!!!
MayaAuthor's Response: Hello!
Thank you my dear for coming back to this story and I'm so glad that you enjoy it so much! This is actually a very popular story for me right now and I have no idea why but you guys are super amazing. *Smooches*
Percy, my dear Percy. I think there are so many things happening to him at once and that he can't quite express himself properly. I never saw him as a very emotional character in the actual HP books either but he may need to be saved before its too late. ;)
I think with Audrey, she's the sort of character that bounces back no matter what happens to her. She's going to struggle but she's going to make it, my girl is a strong one you know! :D
Oh, gosh, thank you so much. I get compliments on my characters alot and their emotions and well, gosh! *Blush* Thank you so much! I promise you that my characters in this story will be happy, its just going to take a while to get there.
Life is like that, you know? :D
And plus, I'm mean to you all because I like to imagine what your faces look like when I leave a juicy cliffie.
I'll be back before you know it!
Thank you again~!
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