Reading Reviews From Member: teh tarik
  
545 Reviews Found

Review #1, by teh tarikBound by Love: Things Least Expected

16th December 2014:
Hey there, lovely!

I'm here for the Hufflepuff Hot Seat woohoo! CONGRATS ON THIS BEING YOUR FIRST STORY! Also, that author's note in the story summary was incredibly sweet! We're really happy to have you in the hearty, homely house of Hufflepuff!

This story, aww aww! ♥ This is such a lovely idea! Frank and Alice leaving Neville a scrapbook before the Death Eaters got to them! A scrapbook with all their memories? I'm loving this idea so much. And I can't wait to get to know more about them as Neville goes through the book. I love Neville, and I'm so glad that you're writing a story about him.

Also, the two letters in the chapter were so beautifully written! Augusta's voice was captured perfectly; I love how she tells her grandson outright that she's proud of him - she always used to be so critical and strict when he was a boy. And hahaha, Augusta has her mysterious ways, it seems! Also, the letter from Frank and Alice. That was just so heartfelt, so emotional and so full of kindness that it made me tear a up a little thinking of their horrible fates at the hands of the Death Eaters. :(

But enough of the angst stuff. I'm hoping that the memories recorded are beautiful ones, and I think it's great that Neville is going to get to know his parents through this way.

Great start! Can't wait to read more. :)

-teh

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Review #2, by teh tarikLying Josephine: Promises, Promises

15th December 2014:
HEY TANYA! ♥

Hufflepuff Hot Seat yay! I've been pretty busy the last day or so, but I must sneak in a quick review before your day on the grand throne of the hot seat ends. So here I am at last! I've heard SO MUCH about this story and about your excellent portrayal of the Weasley twins, and I've actually read the first chapter before (er...apologies for not reviewing that, but it seemed rather short, so I thought it would be better to come straight here!).

Oh my gosh, Tanya. Fred Funeral Fics? T_T Do not do this to me. I have not got over Fred's death, okay? You're awfully cruel. :( First, you had to include that lovely, lovely flashback showing Jo and Fred's adorable friendship, and how much Fred means to someone so introverted and reserved as Jo. THEN YOU HAD TO WRITE HIM DEAD. That's not fair. Poor Jo. I feel for her so much; I understand introversion really really well being a terrible introvert myself, and I can tell that her one friendship with Fred is something that means the world to her. And to lose that one connection to the world, that is honestly awful and I want to cry STOP THIS ALREADY.

BUT of course there's still George! ♥ Poor George. I find it so funny and interesting that Fred would keep a secret from his own twin just to preserve Jo's feelings; it speaks volumes about how well he understands her. And gah, how untimely his death is. Still, at least it seems to propel Jo toward a decision. I do hope she'll reach out to George a bit more. I love that part where she says she's content to love George from afar. That feeling!! ♥ But of course, now I want her to love George from nearby. Like really really nearby. :P

The last part of the chapter...:( :( :( Jo being alone with poor dead Fred again (after running away and hiding from George and waiting for him to walk off). I can't get over this SORRY NO. T_T T_T

I loved these two chapters, Tanya! This is a fab story and I must catch up with the rest of this. I love the Weasley twins, and I really love your OC Jo. She's so flawed but so realistic and all of the feels for her. ♥

-teh

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Review #3, by teh tarikIcarus: Cultivated Arts

14th December 2014:
Ooh, the cube steals dishes?!? Does it get its energy from dishes? AND MARTA ROBBED THE DEPARTMENT OF MYSTERIES GAHAHA. Good lord, that girl is going to be in so much trouble if anybody finds out. (Will Marta go into the parallel universe with Lily???)

Ahh, I LOVE the Potter family dinner! James the Writer whose only positive review is from Lockhart>! Albus speaking Chinese? And Lily spewing lies about her nonexistent job muahaha I LOVE THIS FAMILY. ♥

Ooh, ooh, can't wait to see what happens with the cube!!

Another amazing chapter my dear. ♥

-teh

Author's Response: Who knows what the cube does. Certainly Lily doesn't. :p Wow dish powered, it'd be like totally clean energy ahaha. Marta is a loose cannon! I think she's the only one who can't see how much trouble she'll be in...

So glad you loved the Potter family dinner! :D Ahaha I love the idea of James as a kind of failing author. He should tap into the Seer/Mystic side of himself, I hear there's loads of money in that. ;)

Thanks so much for your awesome reviews, teh! ♥


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Review #4, by teh tarikIcarus: Old and New

14th December 2014:
Hey again!

Ooh, Marta is such a character! Bahaha, I can so totally imagine Lily and her rummaging through Muggle rubbish bins together. And Marta trying to secretly call the paparazzi on Lily and her family just so she can have her moment of fame! And I love the story of how they gradually became friends. So Marta was like a kind of stalker back in Hogwarts, trying to snap pictures of Lily and sell them to the newspaper. She's like a crazy Colin Creevey! Love her!

And I love the contrasts between Iris and Marta as well; they're pretty much extreme opposites of each other with Lily being somewhere in the middle. Iris seems to have the most perfect life of all: she has a cool kitten-cuddling job, is engaged, has an active social life, etc. Neighbour Lance is an interesting sort of bloke...and there's possibly some chemistry between him and Marta already? :P

That silver cube! WHAT IS IT! I really can't wait until you introduce the sci-fi elements of the story! I know these chapters have been mostly setting up the characters, but I've enjoyed them! Your characters are such a unique and sometimes hilarious bunch and I can't wait to see what you do with them.

Fab chapter!

-teh

Author's Response: Haha, yeah it's sort of a compromise, because if given her own way Marta would just steal - this way is both effective and legal and keeps Lily out of the camera eye. Ooh, I love the comparison to 'a crazy Colin Creevey' - yes, I think that sums her up pretty well :D

I'm glad you like the kind of odd balance of their friendship. Lily is definitely right in the middle - she's sort of similar to Iris in personality but more like Marta in terms of her life not being entirely together :p Lance is pretty interesting. I didn't actually intend for him to become a main character, but then he decided he didn't like that and wrote himself into the plot. And yes, there's some... one-sided chemistry :p

Sci-fi elements are coming soon - I'm so glad you've enjoyed the exposition chapters and are finding them unique and hilarious, that's so great to hear. Thank you so much!


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Review #5, by teh tarikIcarus: Prologue

14th December 2014:
Hufflepuff Hot Seat yay!

Kristin! ♥ Holy cow, how did I not know about this story of yours! Parallel universes and possible time paradoxes (at least I'm guessing what's going to happen...)? I love it.

That opening log entry was so so intriguing...what is that ship? Who wrote it? Gah, I'm hooked!

I love how you've characterised Lily so far; I'm loving her narration. There's the sense that she's definitely bored with her life and not really enjoying fame that much. I love all the references to the extended family: Molly and Arthur...and Albus of all people has taken up Arthur's hobby of plug-collecting hahahaha. :P Also, LOVE how disgruntled Lily sounds when she refers to her name, and to the names of her brothers and how they're all named creatively after dead people. I laughed quite a bit at the part about her, James and Albus being named after James I, Lily I and Snape and the whole messy triangle. She's right; I just wonder why Harry would even do this to his children. :P

Ooh, does Lily want to tamper with time just so she can meet all her dead family members? HIGHLY INADVISABLE, LILY. (But go ahead and do it, anyway, or we wouldn't have a story :P )

Brilliant start, Kristin! I can't wait to find out more. :)

-teh

Author's Response: Yay, I'm glad to hear this zany story premise sounds interesting! :D

The opening log entry is there to raise many questions and no answers, at least not for a while >:-D muahaha. But I'm so glad that it intrigues you!

Aw, thank you! I am so thrilled that Lily's narration and her resentment of fame are entertaining. I thought the idea of a plug collection was so hilarious and obviously something that had to be passed down through the generations! :D

Ahaha, yeah I really was not subtle about my distaste for all the next gen names. But I figured Lily might feel the same way, given the shadow she's grown up in because of who her parents and grandparents were.

EXTREMELY INADVISABLE but wouldn't it be exciting anyway? ;)

Thanks so much for your review and I'm so glad you liked this!


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Review #6, by teh tarikChicks Before Broomsticks: Big Game

12th December 2014:
Hey again!

OK, not such a big fan of the coach anymore. Can't believe he continued to let that drunnk, Avery, keep playing, just for the sake of the crowd. But I guess revenue and the sponsors are so important for the team. Also, am hating Logan more than ever argh. :P Professional Quidditch indeed.

I really, really enjoyed this chapter, Julie! SO much drama and tension; I love the way things are building up slowly, and all the cracks in the team are beginning to widen. I'm hoping Logan won't come back to play so soon. :P Then Alec can play in his stead.

AH THAT FINAL BIT. Roxanne asking Hollie to be her girlfriend? THAT CAME OUT OF NOWHERE! I...kind of suspect she's up to something. In fact I'm sure she's asking Hollie to play some part for the paparazzi, muahahhaha, Hollie, THERE'S YOUR CHANCE. :D ...or perhaps Hollie might not really fancy this idea...not many people would agree to being used in this way...either way, there's the potential for things to become very sticky/messy between the two, especially since Hollie has some pretty strong feelings for Roxanne. I can't wait to read on and find out what Hollie's reaction is!

Awesome chapter! :D

-teh

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Review #7, by teh tarikChicks Before Broomsticks: Bad Press

12th December 2014:
Hey Julie! :)

Yay for the Hufflepuff Hot Seat, because I get the chance to come back to your lovely story! It's been some time since I read your first chapter, but it feels great to get back to Hollie's life and all her unrequited love issues. I love that moment between Hollie and Alec in the bar. Alec is such a great friend, and I'm glad Hollie is so honest with him...she really could do with plenty of emotional support. LOVE that bit where they toast and slam their glasses onto the countertop...and are probably sent out by the barkeep. :P

I don't think I've ever read about paparazzi on this site before! So that creepy man with the camera sneaking out from behind a stack of owl cages was really intriguing. At the same time, I really dislike these paparazzi, these...gossip vultures scavenging for scandal. :P

Ugh Logan. I hate this guy more and more. Being intoxicated around primary schoolkids, creating public drama, exposing Roxanne's personal life, basically feeding the media and being a general nuisance. And that article was indeed horribly insensitive. Poor Roxanne. It's such a change, seeing her crying compared to the first chapter. And awww, Hollie just wants to defend her so badly!

...hahaha there probably IS a chance for Hollie with Roxanne, isn't there... :P

Coach is awesome. I love him. I love how he can't stand all this nonsense from Logan and all this public drama, and how he pretty much forbids his team from drinking a single drop. He's asserting himself beyond the Quidditch pitch and into their personal lives, which I think is really fitting, because all the personal lives of the players seem to be leaking into the pitch and causing a lot of difficulties for everyone as a team.

Fabulous chapter, Julie! I really enjoyed reading this; I'll be back for more. :D

-teh

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Review #8, by teh tarikchristmas eve.: spending time with family.

11th December 2014:
Hello lightthecandle! :)

I'm here for the Hufflepuff Hot Seat!

Aww, awww, aww ♥ This story is the perfect Christmas fic! I'm so glad I got the chance to read this; this has put me in a more christmassy mood than ever. This is such a lovely heartwarming story! Your characters (Brooklyn and Earl and Betty) go through such hardship and suffer rejection, loneliness, and so on, but I'm so glad you've written a fairly happy and warm christmas eve for them! Betty knitting scarves for children was just wonderful. And you wrote the relationship between Brooklyn and Earl with such tenderness. I also loved reading about the interactions between Betty and Brooklyn; I love reading about encounters with strangers, and how characters sometimes exit these encounters with surprise, feeling changed. The hospital setting was a quiet sombre sort of place, but it was great to see all these lovely heartwarming Christmas sentiments present!

This is such a lovely piece; I really enjoyed reading this! Great work, my dear!

-teh

Author's Response: Hey teh! :)

That's why I wanted to write it, I wanted to give off a really Christmas-y vibe that would make people get in a festive mood :)

Thank you so much, I should have the other chapters up soon :)

~Aimee xxx


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Review #9, by teh tarikLife As We Know It: chapter three

10th December 2014:
ARGH MALFOY MAKES ME SO ANGRY

It's a miracle Hermione doesn't throw another punch and knock his pretty jawline crooked. :P There's so much friction between Hermione and Malfoy, Hermione and Ron, Hermione and Lavender...poor Hermione! It's pretty much her against the world.

I love how you explore the more secret side of Hermione, the side that yearns for some sort of intimacy, and I like that you make her honest with herself, confronting herself and her desires...and then at the same time, realise she's overthinking things. This is SO Hermione! Every chapter I read, I feel that you break her character open more and more and reveal more of her nature without going OOC for a moment.

I'm glad Hermione fought back against Malfoy in front of Pansy. It's great to see her standing up to him; I don't think Malfoy should be let off the hook so easily for all his insults. The presence of each other destabilises the other's facades, and I think this is a very interesting dynamic between Malfoy and Hermione.

Great work on this chapter, Erica!

-teh

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Review #10, by teh tarikThe Ides of March: A star riding through clouds.

10th December 2014:
Hey Kiana! ♥

Ah ah I've been wanting to read this story for AGES ever since you posted it up but gah, look how awful I am. -hides- OK, this fic has pretty much all the things I love: slash, Founders, religious elements, and your lovely writing!

Gah, I absolutely loved this first chapter: Helena's POV, and how she sometimes directly addresses Eleanor in her narration, and your imagery and descriptions were gorgeous. I love the details of Eleanor's dress, the footprints like stains in the snow, and I love the whole delicate exchange between Eleanor and Helena in the forest. ♥ I can't wait to see how their relationship develops!

I also love how you reveal the details of Helena's family life, and the references to the Founders. Rowena seems harsh and cold in Helena's eyes, and her absent father is quite a mysterious and intriguing figure; I do hope we learn more about him, and of the rift that drove Rowena and Salazar apart! Also, what happened with Salazar? I'm wondering if there was anything between Salazar and Rowena, since Helena is not allowed to think of Salazar...

And of course, I find the change at the end of the chapter very intriguing, when Helena's perspective on religion changes: from her guilt and fear of damnation to thanksgiving to the Almighty. I have a feeling that things won't be so easy for her, though...

Fabulous start, Kiana! ♥ I can't wait to read the next chapter. :)

-teh

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Review #11, by teh tarikLife As We Know It: chapter two

10th December 2014:
I really enjoyed this chapter, Erica. I think you're writing Hermione so, so well!

The whole exchange with Malfoy was great. I was a little angry with Malfoy initially haha. I thought he was being his cruel self, but I'm glad Hermione saw through the whole facade, saw his vulnerability. Now they both need to keep each other's secrets, and I think this is a really interesting way for a relationship to start, or for them to get to know each other's lives better. Not the most conventional way to get to know someone, of course, but then again, Dramione is hardly the most conventional of ships.

Ooh, I love the little detail of the Portable Swamp! I love these nods to canon; these really make your fic fit in nicely with the timeline.

And gah! That moment between HArry and Hermione was amazing. They understand each other so well, and their friendship is something which I always love tor ead about. Also, don't hate me, but I'm quite a big Harmony shipper. :P :P So that scene was a lovely treat.

I think the description of the girls' dorm was great! I love the contrasts between Hermione's bed and the other girls. They're not as tidy or well-kept as her, but I can't help but get the feeling that they're probably enjoying themselves a lot more than poor Hermione is.

Another great chapter, Erica!

-teh

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Review #12, by teh tarikLife As We Know It: chapter one

10th December 2014:
Erica!

Hey dear, I'm here for the Hufflepuff Hot Seat yay! I don't think I've ever read any of your stories before for some reason, so I'm so glad that I have the chance to finally read your work!

I always find well-written Hogwarts Era Dramione intriguing, because I love to see how authors slot in the ship amid all the canon events. I was really surprised to read a fic written in first person, with Hermione as the narrator. It's really refreshing; I can't even remember when I last read Hermione in first person!

And I think you've captured her voice really well, right from the first sentence. You showed her anger, her jealousy and judgemental attitude toward Lavender, and her heated self-denial of her feelings for Ron, as well as her sense of pride.

And gah, that must have been the worst of luck for poor Hermione: running away to the Room of Requirement to clear her thoughts and escape from Ron and Lavender, only for those two to turn up there. :( Ooh, I had the feeling Malfoy would be in there, the moment she heard that noise!

I can't wait to read on; this meeting between Draco and Hermione is really intriguing. Brilliant start, Erica! ♥

-teh

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Review #13, by teh tarikThe Fires of St Anthony: Bäckahäst

6th December 2014:
Hey Laura! ♥

First, CONGRATULATIONS for winning NaNo! :D I know I kind of abandoned you as a NanoMum after a couple of weeks (SORRY!) but I think you did fabulously well in the end so yay! Also, bah, apologies for taking so long to come read and review this second chapter of your amazingly original novel.

This chapter was sooo creepy my gosh. I love how it started out with the mysterious ship again and the students sailing it. I'm really intrigued about the ship and what sort of mystery it holds and how will that be linked to Anthony. I'm guessing it has something to do with the drowned boy who tried to attack Anthony in that creepy shower scene. As usual, your descriptions were so vivid and visual; I love the whole part about the ship dropping like a stone rather than sliding into the water like a diver. That was amazing.

Love reading about Anthony's first day on the job, all hungover from last night's vodka in the staffroom. First day on the job, and he's been attacked by spirits of some kind, and also a student is dead.

Those italicised parts of the narrative about Clothilde - those were done so well! I didn't understand the timeline at first, but by the end of the chapter, when it's revealed that all the events with the girls were taking place in the present while Anthony is fumbling through his first day at work, it gave me the chills. Honestly, this is the best way to reveal events and destabilise the narrative with the shift of perspective from Anthony's viewpoint. It really adds to that atmosphere of mystery and suspense.

OK, I'm with Anthony on tying up Matyas and beating the answers out of him. Matyas is probably the most unhelpful guy in Durmstrang. :P I mean, from the last chapter, he clearly has some idea about what's going on but chose to be all cryptic and condescending.

ANYWAY, fabulous chapter, Laura! Everything is so exciting and super tense and I can't wait for an update, so update!! And CONGRATS ONCE AGAIN! ♥

-teh

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Review #14, by teh tarikMayor Hanley Umbridge (And the Almost-Ruined Thanksgiving): Thanksgiving Dinner

6th December 2014:
OK, my mouth is watering with all those descriptions of food. WHY DO YOU DO THIS TO ME. *drools*

This was such a great chapter, and I guess a very fitting ending to your two-shot. Dolores doesn't have much of a redemption, and I think it would really be difficult to give her one, to justify all her evil awful deeds during the war, so I think you made the right choice to write her this way. She's changed a bit, but most of her nastiness is there, in the way that she ignores Brice and how she's 'sore' about 'picking the wrong side' in the war rather than genuinely remorseful about her deeds.

Also, I really really admire Hanley for doing all this. I mean, he's afraid that his nasty sister will ruin Thanksgiving, but STILL decides to give her a chance, still acknowledges her as part of the family and takes the risk and invites her.

I love the ending paragraph of your story! It's such a good way to end it. And I'm laughing a bit at Dolores running out screaming. She's going back to Azkaban, for sure.

I really enjoyed your story! So glad I had the chance to read this. :)

-teh

Author's Response: Thanksgiving is kind of my (Georgina's) favorite holiday and wanted to show why it is so fantastic. Sorry if you gained ten pounds in the making. ;)

I tried to convey that nobody is made up of only evil, and the vilest character in the HP universe needed to be convinced that she was in the right the entire time. She began to change her ideas because of Judy and Brice, though she really doesn't like Brice since he's not afraid of her.

Hanley's the kind of guy who gives someone a second or third chance (but under careful watch). He wants to make sure people have their best shot at life they can get, like what happened to him when he left England.

I really like the ending too. By the end, Dolores is not purely sadistic, but more broken. What do you do when the man you thought you had wounded beyond fixing returns to bandage you? Run away, apparently.

Thank you so much! It's nice to know when our stuff is being read!
--Georgina


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Review #15, by teh tarikMayor Hanley Umbridge (And the Almost-Ruined Thanksgiving): Muggle Airport

6th December 2014:
Hi Freda and Georgina! :)

I'm here from the Hufflepuff Holiday Gift Tag with a couple of reviews for you! This story looks awfully lonely with no reviews, so let's change that. ;)

I was pretty excited to read an Umbridge story, especially after reading the new Pottermore info on Umbridge, and so it's great to read your interpretation of Umbridge's family. I'm so glad you chose to write from the perspective of her Squib brother. What a decent guy he is haha, getting his sister out of Azkaban for a week and flying her all the way to the States for Thanksgiving dinner, especially after her horrible treatment of him.

That family flashback of the Umbridges was simply horrible. Poor Ellen! Orford is horrible, and I can definitely see the similarities between him and Dolores. Ugh.

But I love the relationship between Hanley and Dolores appears to be changing! And how Dolores is beginning to show a modicum of interest in Muggle things, like the inflight TV screen and movies and such. Ooh, Hanley's daughter is a witch!

Great start! I'm off to read the next chapter. :)

Author's Response: Hello, teh.

Thank you so much, we were hoping for more reviews.

Yes, Pottermore is what inspired this story. I wanted to experiment with Dolores' brother and figured he had to be the decent sort; sometimes kids pushed around like that turn out better for it since they try to keep others from experiencing what they did.

Like father, like daughter. Ellen certainly wasn't perfect, but it wasn't because she was a muggle.

After Azkaban, a person is bound to change. We don't have Umbridge change her ways, but rather more of her compassionate side appear. You liked the little twist at the end, nice!

Great, see you there!
--Georgina


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Review #16, by teh tarikFireflies: Fireflies

4th December 2014:
Hiya! Awww, what a sweet fluffy story! Just the kind of fluff I was searching for. :) And Luna/Neville as well. I don't read a lot of fics about this ship, but I do like this pairing very much, and I think you did a great job exploring a slightly darker and definitely more vulnerable side to Luna. I love the relationship between them and how easy they find each other's company. The imagery was lovely, especially the part about the fireflies and the fading sky and everything.

I love post-Hogwarts fics like this: that small sense of hope at the end for the survivors. This is a wonderful story and I really enjoyed reading this! Great work!

-teh

Author's Response: Thank you for the really lovely review! I've been the same way. I adore their relationship but I haven't read a lot of fanfiction about them.

Luna has always been this big strong figure and it always seems like nothing can get her down. Vulnerable Luna is starting to grow on me.

Thank you for the very kind review!


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Review #17, by teh tarikAnd Just Like That: Chapter 2

30th November 2014:
Hi Jess!!

At long last, I'm back to read your second chapter. I'm so terribly sorry for taking such a long time; October and November have both been incredibly hectic months, and I've had little for reading. But thank you for coming back to request; I really do love your story. I find it your perspective on Lily/James and your depiction of them so refreshing.

By the way, belated congratulations for this being October's Featured Story at TGS! ♥ You really do deserve this; I think you're an incredible writer and your characterisation and dialogue are both so deft and perceptive.

I have to say the opening section gave me chills. Severus is definitely a creepy stalker in that one, and the scene with him following her through the supermarket aisles without saying a word is something that's just incredibly unsettling. You really know how to set that atmosphere without overstating it, and that's what I really like about your writing. There's a chasm that has opened up between Lily and Severus, and it's something that the latter just can't understand, though it's so obvious to Lily. Severus simply can't empathise with Lily, or see her for what she is, as a person in her own right. His own obsession with her gets in the way of that. And you did a brilliant job of showing these complexities in their characters.

I think Lily and James's relationship is developing wonderfully. There are the beginnings of romance, but things don't go too quickly, which is something I really enjoy. The pacing of the story, the slowness of their relationship - it gives time for both characters to understand each other better.

Also, I'm glad to see that Mary quit the job along with Lily. Those girls deserve better. But to be honest, Lily's new waitressing job doesn't sound too great either, what with groping teenage boys and leering male customers...ugh. I've been a waitress myself but thankfully I've never been harrassed to the extent that Lily is experiencing.

Another thing I really appreciate about your story is your very subtle sense of a setting. You don't go around painting your story with descriptions of the story setting, but still, the sense of the smallness of the town that Lily lives in is always present. The little details like how she's been to all the cafes in town and none of them are hiring, the difficulty of landing a job, how easy it is for Severus to find her when she goes shopping, etc. These details kind of set up very confined almost claustrophobic atmosphere, and I think it suits Lily's situation very well, mirroring her own frustration with the limitations she encounters in her life as a woman and as a jobseeker. I think this subtle approach really suits your story!

I'm really excited about the whole mobile cafe plan! It's great to see Lily having the chance to be the boss of her own self, and I'm hoping it will work out. This has been such a great chapter, Jess! I'm hoping that more will be come soon. Congratulations, once again! ♥

-teh

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Review #18, by teh tarikVelvet Hands: Velvet Hands

23rd November 2014:
Hello Andy!

Right, I owe you many things: a reply to your PM, a response to your lovely review...and probably one hundred other things which I've forgotten yet again because oh my lord, WHAT HAVE YOU JUST WRITTEN HERE! ♥

First off, I love this. I absolutely adored this. This has so many things that I love, this story: non-linear narratives, slash, the Fat Friar (my favourite ghost EVER), a focus on minor characters, and gorgeous passages full of vivid details.

One of the strongest things about this story is your pacing, and just how beautifully you let the story unfold without pressing too much information ont he reader at the start. There are these little details like Rosmerta visiting her niece, which you don't explain all at once. It really builds and builds slowly, and I just kept reading because I was so intrigued by Rosmerta's life, by the sense of loneliness pervading her life. And I love oneshots that deal with the strange alliances/bonds that sometimes develop between utter strangers; it's just one of the things about real life that fascinate me greatly, and so this story is just right up my alley.

Your writing is gorgeous, my dear. There you go heaping the praise on me, but you yourself are so fabulously talented. In particular, you are completely amazing with detail and imagery: the second flashback is my favouritest part of the whole fic, with all those beautiful scenes of Mina and her sister picking figs and summer cherries and stealing chestnuts and then of Rosmerta and Mina laying together for the first time with Mina's hair getting everywhere...these were just beautiful! I keep repeating myself!! But!! GAH ♥ The description of Mina as a 'a patchwork person - rendered whole with nothing but the stitching of Rosmerta’s imagination' is absolutely gorgeous! And of course, it adds to the whole tragedy and the thing that Rosmerta can't accept: that just as much as her own imagination stitched Mina's past life together, so now with Mina gone it is unstitching the memory of Mina.

I loved that whole part about memory, and how the details start to go one by one. They were so heartbreaking, Andy: to have Mina's detail-rich life (and Rosmerta particularly revelled in the stories of her past) fading away is the worst sort of thing that can happen to someone who has lost a loved one.

I thought Rosmerta's treatment of Vera was so interesting. I'm glad to see that she didn't accept Vera straight away, or at least didn't feel any affinity for the child right away. It really makes things realistic here, and suggests that Rosmerta is first and always attracted to Mina.

By the way, I also loved your depiction of the Friar. Compassionate, cheerful, and comforting - just how I love to read him. The dialogue between them was exceptional, and some lines were so hard-hitting. I love the contrasts between Rosmerta's situation and the Friar's - how their experiences of death are both so vastly different, and yet they are still both unified for a moment because of death.

OK, although I loved all your flowing amazing descriptive parts, THIS part is my favourite.

'Velvet hands,' Rosmerta says abruptly, her tongue clumsy around the delicate word. 'She had velvet hands.'

The Friar watches her, a thoughtful look in his eyes. 'I cannot remember what velvet feels like, my dear.'

Rosmerta smiles at the ghost, feeling the unbearable truth at the tip of her tongue.

'Me neither,' she admits.


^ I swear I just wanted to slam my laptop shut and cry because A;SLKD;KGSLDKJFLK WHAT PERFECTION IS THAT PART.

Bittersweetness, fluff/angst, the whole emotion package, I can't even...

Sorry, I'm all incoherent. *sobs*

Apologies for this rambling review. This is an amazing story, Andy! You ought to be well proud of this, and I really do hope you produce more one-shots like this. ♥

-teh

Author's Response: teh!!

OH MY GOD. That was my first reaction when I saw this review - even before I started reading it! You know how I swoon over everything of yours that I read! And then this! It's like you meet the Queen and she kisses YOUR hand! I mean, my hand. Do people even have to kiss the Queen's hand? What am I even talking about?! See, I'm freaking out!

Anyway, THANK YOU for reading this, for reviewing this, for using hearts and capital letters (because then you know the reviewer is not lying! :D) and just- *passes out*

I'll try to be as coherent as possible. You just counted practically everything that I love in stories - whether FF or OF. And later on, the parts you said you liked were definitely the parts of the story I most enjoyed writing - so basically, we are literary soulmates!

As I mentioned in my A/N, this was the first time I used present tense and non-linear narration so to hear that the pacing was good and that I didn't bombard the reader with too much information at once is so great to hear! The fact that you were intrigued and had kept on reading out of curiosity is just a huge compliment! And ah, the alliances between perfect strangers, that's a great theme, I agree. I love it - in books, in movies, in real life - there's just some basic 'we-are-all-human' beauty in it.

And about my writing - gah, thank you!! I think I almost cried when I read this part. OK, I'm lying, my eyes were all watery. I guess I have confidence issues. This story is SO experimental for me, it's different from anything I've ever written but I think it's safe to say I've found my style. I'm currently writing two one-shots (slash, non-linear, minor characters :P) in a very similar style so to hear you saying you loved this is the greatest encouragement to finish these other two stories. So, thank you again!

The childhood scenes! This is completely random but Mina and her sister picking figs is the first paragraph I'd written for this story. My mum had packed me a basket of figs and I was forcing myself to eat them so they don't go to waste (and I don't even like figs!) and I just thought: 'I have to write about figs! How do I write about figs?' - and so I wrote that scene and voila! - Mina was born! :D

The patchwork bit! So far, in every review for this story there was mention of the patchwork sentence and I'm becoming more and more proud of it. :) But I love what you said, how with Mina gone, the memory of her is being unstitched - that is such a poetic analysis, I'm sorry I hadn't thought of it myself. :P

I'm pleased that you liked the part about the memory. I agree, it is so saddening to lose these little details that once made someone the person that they were. It's like losing them constantly, day after day, and not all at once. Thank you, I'm so relieved to hear I did justice to this subject. :)

Vera! Another relief! I definitely didn't want Rosmerta to come off as heartless but I also didn't think she would, as you put it, 'feel any affinity for the child right away' so I'm glad you found that part realistic.

Wee, the Friar! God, it was so great to write him - he practically wrote himself! And since you seem to be a hard-core Fat Friar fan - I'm glad I did justice to your favourite ghost!

I love how you have more than one favourite part of this story, it just makes me feel so proud and happy! And thank you for quoting that whole thing! I was hoping someone would say something about it because it's one of the things I really like about this story (hence the title). Also, I never thought a bunch of random capital letters could make me so happy! I couldn't stop smiling throughout this entire review and then this last part was like a cherry on top.

Apologies? Teh, this was such a lovely, thoughtful, exciting review! I've read it over fifty times already and I will surely return to it in the future. Thank you for even reading this - you really did make me feel proud of this story!

Talk to you soon, dear!
Andy


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Review #19, by teh tarikThe Worst: It Is Time

23rd November 2014:
Hi AD!! ♥

I'm here like I said I would be...though a lot later than promised. *hides* So sorry, love! I've been struggling with balancing things but I finally managed to take some time to read your latest chapter (so glad to be getting back into the story...I'd forgotten quite a bit of the last chapter, so I had to skim through it briefly). Oh yeah, THAT disastrous proposal.

Aww, this chapter was pretty angst-filled, but I think it's appropriate; after all, Dom and Teddy are going through quite a rough patch in their relationship. On hindsight, perhaps Teddy's proposal wasn't such a good idea, given the timing. It definitely would have made more sense for him to wait a little while for them both to settle with the new changes to their lives. But still, i do like his commitment. Proposing to her was like offering to seal the deal: that no matter how tough things get with Dom's lycanthropy, that he'd always be with her. But obviously Dom isn't really, which is also equally understandable.

I really loved the exchange you wrote between them in this chapter. It's a long exchange, and one that's very passionate and emotion-filled. I think your dialogue is very good; it's certainly very meaningful and direct, and it doesn't skirt around issues. I like how open and sincere the conversation between them was; I've been reading a few too many snark fics haha, so this is refreshing. :) It's quite sad that despite such a deep conversation, the two can't quite reach an understanding between each other. Personally, I feel that Teddy should hold back a little and he definitely should NOT have left Dom alone at such a vulnerable moment of her life.

I love the contrast between Teddy's treatment of her and the caring support she gets from Bill and Fleur - those letters were wonderful. I'm glad that DOm still has people to turn to.

I think you did an excellent job of describing the transformation with wolfsbane potion; it definitely sounds unpleasant but not completely unbearable. Still, you ended on a cliffhanger, my dear!!

I'm really glad to be back in this story, AD! Sorry it has taken me quite a while, but this was a great chapter! I don't think you need to worry so much about this, and I do hope you get the next one up soon (and hopefully writer's block is gone for like FOREVER). ♥

-teh

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Review #20, by teh tarikThe Fires of St Anthony: Alpdrücke

17th November 2014:
Hi Laura! ♥

I read this a few days ago so it's high time I leave you a review. So far, I'm absolutely in love with what you've written, the concept, the characters, the way you so effortlessly create Durmstrang - waah all the details are absolutely amazing I can't even pick my favourite. Your gorgeous imagery and all the careful details, especially the treacherous Jörmungandr’s Stair. SO GLAD you set Durmstrang in Scandinavia; I think it's where JKR said it would be, and I've always accepted that the school is set somewhere there. Plus all that potential for Norse mythology references! :D

And the characters!! So that is what the Durmstrang teachers get up to in their staffroom! LOVE IT. Anthony Goldstein made me laugh a bit, how out of place he is, and how easily affected he is by their vodka - I'm loving the dynamic between him and Matyas - there's something very wrong about everything, and I just can't wait to see what else happens.

I think this has got to be my favourite description of Durmstrang I've ever read:

Hogwarts never really stopped, but in Durmstrang, there was a start and an end to every day, there was a dark and a light, and the two did not so much as merge as give way to one another. It suited the school: the idea of clashing extremes, of twinned and twined ideals, when its own students were so very, very different.

Durmstrang, he decided, assembled order out of chaos; Hogwarts did exactly the opposite.


Holy amazing YES.

Anyway, this isn't a very coherent review, but just to say that I'm completely in love with your NaNo project (this and L'optimisme) and your writing, and I hope you update this soon! Must find out more about Durmstrang pirates and this mysterious Alpdrücke (which I have yet to Google) and the whole ghostly encounter and the other narrative in italics interspersed with the main story. You've got a great atmosphere and an amazing mystery and I love all of the mythology!

Fabulous writing! ♥

-teh

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Review #21, by teh tarikCity of Angels: City of Sorrow

8th November 2014:
asdjlkjalsfk

OK So MANY things I want to flail about!! Let me get started with my flailing! ♥

The whole first scene in the Underworld! That was seriously amazing; I could visualise everything: the rivers, the abseiling workers, the tunnels, HADES and his palace made of souls, and references to DEATH HIMSELF. I love your worldbuilding here so much, and I hope you'll continue to develop more elements of your story's world in greater, more glorious detail.

ANGELS AND DEMONS. Angels are demons? Or a type of demon? AND MISTY IS AN ANGEL? This is so exciting I cannot wait for more. I love that mention about Death Bringers; I can't wait for one to appear in your fic!

DENNIS CREEVEY KILLED THE IMPOSSIBLE HUMAN. And he's going to die in less than a month aslkdjlkasjd no

Do not let him die please :( :( The impossible human is going to go after him, isn't he?

Oh, Pansy's section was fabulous as well!! I recognise parts of it from the old CoA, and I'm glad you've kept her characterisation and job the same!! And the post office girl, the one with the name CLoudy...does Pansy mean 'Misty'? :P Misty the Angel is a post office worker?

And the whole Anna Frobisher thing is really intriguing. Are the dead coming back to life? More resurrections?

WHO IS THAT IN THE HOTEL ROOM

...am going to guess it's either Misty OR DENNIS CREEVEY. Or Death. :P

You already know how much I love this fic and really, thank you for writing this! ♥ ♥ You're amazing, please update soon! :)

-teh

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Review #22, by teh tarikCity of Angels: Prologue

6th November 2014:
ISOBEL ♥

Just so you know: I AM SO INCREIDBLY EXCITED FOR THIS FIC. ♥ ♥

I never actually found out what the old version of CoA is about...you dropped plenty of hints, but not enough to put the whole picture together. :P BUT this new prologue is amazing. OK, I don't remember telling you (did I? ) but all that stuff about the afterlife, and of supernatural things like angels and demons are some of my favouritest things to read about, along with a whole lot of mythology and folklore, even those which I'm not familiar with - like ancient Greek mythology. So THANK YOU for dedicating such a brilliant fic to me, which has ALL OF THE THINGS THAT I LOVE PLUS DENNIS CREEVEY AND DENNIS/PANSY.

I can't remember if you introduced Misty Waters in the old version; I have a feeling that I read about her at the end of the first chapter, where she's researching on Dennis and Astoria or something...but her (re)introduction in this prologue is amazing and so so intriguing. So she's trying to find out the secret of resurrection? By poisoning a not-demon resurrected human? I want to know so much more and can I just say how happy I am that you're doing this for NaNo?

I really, really hope that you'll win NaNo ahhah - so I can read this, the whole thing muahaha.

This is an absolutely fab start, lovely! ♥

JUST PUT THE NEXT CHAPTER UP ALREADY OK

-teh

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Review #23, by teh tarikshe's thunderstorms: she's thunderstorms

5th November 2014:
Waaahh! ADI! ♥ ♥ Hey, Nano mum & daughter!

This is GORGEOUS. IT'S DEAN/LUNA ISN'T IT? *sobs* This was so lovely; it's been ages since I read anything of yours - honestly, you should have kicked me hard in the solar plexus and demanded that I go over to your AP and read and worship your stuff. Anyway, here I am to worship. Gah, your language is amazing. Simple, but so vivid, so transcendent. I love the potato peel necklaces! So Luna. And I love that you wrote this through Dean's POV. I love Dean very much; I always enjoy reading stories from his POV, especially post-Hogwarts stuff. Also, your use of second person POV - alskdjlkflkasd

The last paragraph. Oi. Was that necessary!!! Why couldn't you have ended on a happy note, or gone AU. (GO AWAY ROLF SCAMANDER).

There are a hundred ways to mix your paint, but you are sure that with each varied stroke, with each new hue, you will always love the same girl every time.

^ What perfection is that?!

This was absolutely gorgeous, Adi, you talented person, you! ♥

And I'm sorry for this useless short review...but stupid NaNo. Let's do some Eat Races together. ^.^

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Review #24, by teh tarikWe Lived: We Lived

5th November 2014:
Hey Roisin!

It's been too long since I read any of your work (I promise to get back to Y5 once NaNo is over...), so I dropped by your page to read something...goodness, you've been busy! There are so many new stories!!! And this one caught my eye because it's young Dumbledore which is my favourite, and because of the ship. Albus/Gellert is my number one OTP hahaha, but honestly, I love reading Dumbledore shipped with almost any character at all! From a later reading of the books, I've always wondered if there was something between Dumbledore and Doge - something more than best friends. And your fic fits so beautifully in canon! I'm so glad someone has explored this ship in such a beautiful and thought-provoking way! I really loved this, everything, Elphias's narration, your characterisation of Albus, and the complex relationship between the two, the complexity of characterisation. I love the way both characters change with the passage of time; that must have been my favourite thing - the emotional subtlety and complexity (sorry for using the same word over and over!). And that last part was absolutely amazing.

How did we get to be so old?

We lived.


alskdjlaksjdlasWAAHH

*wails*

*sobs*

This is perfect, Roisin! ♥

-teh

Author's Response: Hello!!!

*Squee* Thank you so much for this review :D Some sort of history between Elphias and Dumbledore has definitely been my headcanon since before I knew the word headcanon! I'm super hoping to LAUNCH THIS SHIP with this story, because I'm SO CONVINCED this happened!

And, yee! I'm so glad you liked the voice and narration and complexity! It was definitely a struggle to capture the perspective of someone so much older than me, who was young so long ago. And I gave myself the really wacky task of writing the gay culture as era accurate, while also implying that the wizarding world is historically more progressive on certain issues (feminism, sexuality, race).

Thank you so much for taking the time to read and review this story! Your kind words give me so many happy feels!

xoxo
Roisin


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Review #25, by teh tarikTwo Words: Cold

4th November 2014:
Hi Joseph! :)

I came looking for this story after you mentioned having written something in reverse chronological order in my Novel Nest (I'm so sorry that I haven't replied *hides* - I've been busy for so long, and then NaNo happened...), and I just had to read it. I love stories written in reverse chronological order; there are way too few of these types of stories on the archives!

Anyway, this was honestly amazing. For such a short piece, the structure and the style and the mystery all fitted together seamlessly, and I was thoroughly enthralled with the careful revelation of events. Gah, and you managed to characterise Scorpius so well in such little space! As well as Rose and Draco, of course. But probably the most amazing thing of this story is how well it has been crafted to meet the requirements of the Microfiction Challenge. Every paragraph was a mini-story in itself, and yet when put together, each part falls in neatly with the next. I read the whole thing as a single story at first, then I went back and reread each paragraph as a sort of standalone drabble, and gosh, it really works.

Also, I read your response to Roisin's review (I always love reading what other reviewers say, and the author's responses!), and you mentioned that Carky is a reference to Background Noise!?!? Like, thank you!? I'm very honoured that you chose to include a Background Noise reference here; thank you so much! ♥

This was an absolutely fantastic fic, and I hope you're proud of it!

Apologies for the shortness of this review, but I really do have to get back to NaNo-ing. :) Once again, amazing work!

-teh

Author's Response: Hi teh!

I was not expecting you to come review this at all! I really enjoy reverse chronological order so much and I'm through the roof that you're writing it for NaNo.

This review makes me so happy! It took a really long time to plan this for it to be only 500 words. I definitely tried to give everyone their own distinct personalities and present a few mysteries and twists. I have so much headcanon for this because my plans are actually much longer than the story.

I'm so glad that you experimented with ways this could be read!! That's exactly what I intended for people to do with this. I wanted them to be standalone stories and be able to be read from bottom to top as well and still keep a bit of the intrigue. It's awesome to see that people actually do this without me actively telling them to or anything.

(I totally read other reviews/responses too!) The Background Noise reference came about because I was writing this shortly after re-reading that story and I literally couldn't think of any House elf name that sounded better than Carky. I dramatically felt like the story would be imperfect if I used any other name, so I slipped in a reference. Also, I adore that story in and of itself so it seemed appropriate to give it a little tip of the hat.

Thank you for this amazing review, such a nice surprise! :D


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