Oooh, how very exciting! I'm actually reading and reviewing a chapter on the very first day it comes out! This is definitely unusual...
Anyway, this chapter was awesome, but that's obviously nothing new! I actually loved the section from Violet's point of view! She was still a complete...witch, but somehow she seemed nicer. No, nicers not the word - she definitely wasn't nice. I think somehow she seemed more human.
Wow. I just realized what a load of waffle that last paragraph was. Sorry about that, it's still early and I haven't had my peanut butter and honey on toast yet.
Okay, winding back up. I really liked the start of this chapter, because I don't think I've ever read about a Head Student meeting in any fanfiction but yours - and the start of this chapter just felt so...so Hogwartsy! I think that's what I love about your story most of all - that you haven't forgotten about the magic that is Hogwarts. The simple things like prefect meetings, classes and studying. And I'm glad that Lily put Abigail in her place!
Violet and Alrek! I am officially trembling in my boots! Nothing good can come out of those two plotting together - Alrek is one of the most creepiest people I have ever read, I have to say. Even Violet was uncomfortable around him, which is certainly saying something!
Naw, Lily and James! So many feels! Especially Lily feels - I absolutely adore the way you write her and I adored how nervous she was in this chapter. But I kinda have to agree with James - for someone who is so smart, she can be pretty thick. And I think James' reaction to Lily's little piece of Violet related news was perfect - I think this chapter showed very well how much he has grown up over his school years. In his fourth or fifth year, he definitely would not have been that mature!
I'm looking forward to the next u[date already!
Courtney:) Report Review
I FINALLY got the time to read this chapter! I am honestly so sick of all this work that is keeping me from my reading and writing fanfiction - but it's Saturday today, two o'clock in the afternoon and I'm still in my pyjamas. Good day!
Anyway, I loved this chapter, especially Alice's point of view - have there been any chapters from her point of view before this one? If not, you should write them more often! I'm so glad Alice and Frank made up! Because of your story, they are honestly now one of my favourite couples! And I really liked that you gave us insight into how they actually became that couple.
Oh, and Moody's entrance was great! I loved the line: “Stop right there, girl,” he said, twisting around meeting his eyes with hers. “Let’s not say something that’s going to make me throw up the breakfast I just had. Besides, after today, you’re going to hate me more than you’d hate an ornery dragon hell bent on taking off your head.” From what I have read of him so far, you write Moody absolutely perfectly!
I enjoyed Lily's point of view, too. It was nice to see the group doing something as simple and ordinary (well, ordinary for Hogwarts) as studying for N.E.W.T's. I have to agree with Lily - I have no idea why she would take History of Magic. Though I guess I can't talk, as I take History at school...and almost fall asleep every time.
Agh, Violet! She really is the most annoying person - I felt like throttling her quite a bit in this chapter. I have to admit, Lily shows quite a lot of restraint when it comes to her - Belle, on the other hand, well...that is probably how I would act, to be honest. I honestly love the fire Belle has in her, and how protective she is of Lily.
Ugh, the conversation that Lily and Belle overheard! I really hope Lily doesn't do anything stupid...and I hope James doesn't do anything even stupider.
Courtney:) Report Review
This was yet another great chapter, I enjoyed it.
I am really starting to love Beth as a character. She seems very natural, very normal and I can't wait to read more! However, I found Peter's line about only a couple of them joining Remus during the full moon a little suspicious...
I liked that you brought up the Order of the Phoenix in this chapter - after all, there are only a few more years left until James and Lily's deaths (sob) so it will be very interesting to see how the war plays a part in all this.
Finally an interaction between Beth and Snape! I think you wrote their conversation very well - Snape definitely came off a little creepy, which I kinda think suits his obsessive tendencies. In fact, their conversation kind of made me wonder why it is Beth fancies him the first place...hmm.
Anyway, I'm looking forward to the next chapter, and definitely adding this to my favourites!
Courtney:) Report Review
I honestly wish I had something more intelligent or constructive to say in these reviews! I just have a feeling that as I keep reading your three novels (because I am certainly going to be doing that) all I'll be able to say each time is "that chapter was great!" or "I really enjoyed that chapter!" I guess that's a good thing though - your writing seems pretty flawless.
I love that the marauders have their own compartment! And also how you're adding in little details about each character that help us to get to know them a little better - like the fact that Peter is a bit of a worrywart (by the way, I forgot to mention this in my last review but I am so glad you actually included Peter! I've noticed that some authors just tend to make him...fade into the background) and that Beth seems to be a little timid and insecure about some things.
I also found that all of your characters were very realistic and normal in this chapter, like that conversation on the train. They just seemed to be an ordinary group of teenage boys (and girl) which I really like!
The entrance of Snape - I don't think you could have written it any better! I've always seen Sirius as being the one marauder who is the most horrible to him, and that definitely showed! I also think Beth's reactions worked really well - while she felt bad for Snape and wished her friends wouldn't treat him like that, she didn't really do anything about it. I think that definitely shows something about her character - perhaps that she relies quite a bit on what other people, especially her friends think of her. However I am definitely looking forward to seeing how the relationship between she and Snape works out - and actually begins!
Courtney:) Report Review
Okay, so I have been meaning to read this for so long now, and somehow haven't gotten around to it. But I am super glad I have now because this first chapter was awesome and definitely made me want to read more!
I've actually never read anything that features Snape as a teenager - at least not where he's a main character, anyway, which is weird because he's always been one of my favourite characters. In saying that, I've never really liked the idea of a relationship between he and Lily so I'm loving this idea of Beth, the fifth marauder, having a bit of a crush.
I've heard that the fifth marauder thing has been done quite a lot, but I've personally never read one, so I am definitely excited to see what happens next! I think the personalities of all five of your marauders seemed spot on - we didn't get to see an awful lot of them this chapter, but I can't wait to see how their personalities will be expanded.
This was a great first chapter!
Courtney:) Report Review
This was another great chapter. I really love your writing style, and I am definitely going to have to check out some of your other stories - it is really easy to read and I kinda like the fact that it is short and sweet.
I've said it before (I think) but I absolutely adore the idea of this story (I wish I had thought of it first - grrr!) and can't wait to see where it goes next.
Courtney:)Author's Response: Hello! Thanks so much for the lovely review, it means a lot. :) I'm so happy you like my writing style!
I know what you mean, I feel like that when I read other stories as well. :P
Again, thanks so much for the kind review! :)
~Rosie Report Review
Oooh, an update! How exciting!
Wow. If I'd spoken the above line I would've sounded like a warbling grandmother. Brilliant.
I love Edie and Lisa, I really do - sometimes they seem like such polar opposites that it's amazing they are friends. And that hot cocoa sounded really good - I'm kinda craving some, actually. I also really hope that Justin doesn't lose it when Lisa tells him she's pregnant!
Grr, Rose just makes me want to grind my teeth together in annoyance. That is really all I have to say about her - you do a great job of making me dislike her. A lot.
Hehe, Oliver wrote Edie a note! That made me laugh - especially the description of how red his face went. But now I am desperate to know what it said! Bad Edie! Why did you burn it up? I loved how once Oliver was out of the room she tried to recover the note...and failed. Just more disappointments in the life of Edie Lennox!
Ah, Seamus and Dean. Possibly two of my favourite characters. And I have to say, the description of their flat was very blokey! And I loved the line: “Do we have to wear black?” Dean wonders, rubbing his chin. “We probably should. But I don’t know if I have a proper black jumper. And it’s too cold out for a tee shirt…”
Great chapter, as usual.
Courtney:)Author's Response: Hi, hi, hi again! And there's nothing wrong with warbling grandmothers. They always have the best candy!
Lisa and Edie really are polar opposites, in a lot of ways. I think it's their loyalty and drive that makes them so similar (unfortunately, Lisa's the only one who's hard work ethic is paying off.)
I had so many Oliver feels while I was writing that scene! Like you, his face going all red got to me. I imagine him standing there, completely rigid, arm fully extended to an uncomfortable amount, stuck in this stupid pose waiting Edie to grab the note he's emabrrassed to be handing over in the first place.
And yes, total fail on Edie's part xD She was too proud to read it, even though she was dying to see what it said. Well, I guess we'll never know... ORWILLWEOMGPLOTTWIST.
I'm glad their flat came across as blokey, haha. There needed to be a legitimate reason why Edie would never try to live with them, so it's a complete pigsty!
Thank youuu!! Your reviews are always so wonderful ♥ Report Review
I'm going to have to make this review short because I'm supposed to be at school in ten minutes (sob!)
This was a great chapter, obviously - and I loved the article. It was great to some of Edie's writing. I loved that it was a tad snarky and definitely had a mean streak running through it.
I actually love Justin! I definitely see what you mean when you say he and Edie are pretty much the same person. Neither of them are very good with the whole lovey-dovey emotional stuff.
Lisa's pregnant?? Gasp! I love the way you revealed this big piece of news to us, at the same time Edie told Lisa she was unemployed.
I am eagerly awaiting the next chapter!
Courtney:)Author's Response: YESSS A JUSTIN FAN!! I am throwing confetti over here. I just love him. He's such an emotionally-challenged, nitpicky guy, but he absolutely adores Lisa (and he thinks Edie's cool, though he'd never admit it.) And anyone who likes Lisa is okay by me :P
The "I'm pregnant," "I'm unemployed" thing has been written for months and months--at the time I came up with it, Edie wasn't supposed to have a job at all. But it just wasn't realistic that she could have survived without going back to the ol' Rusty Knight, so I overlooked the fact that she's technically employed.
Thanks so much for the review! I hope you weren't late to school! ;3 Report Review
Wow, it feels like ages since I last read and reviewed this story and I have to say, I'd forgotten how much I love it! All of your characters are just so amazingly perfect and so real, you writing is clever and funny and so easy and fun to read! I'm pretty much fangirling over here, this side of the laptop screen!
Ah, Seamus. I think he has to be my favourite character. I absolutely adore the banter between him and Edie - the way he just casually mentioned he stopped by Edie's old flat because he was hungry, the way he exclaims: "You're getting laid!" He is just pure perfection!
I have to admit, I find the thought of Edie running quite amusing. I can just imagine her, all red-faced and sweaty. She'd probably look a bit like me doing exercise, actually. I'm generally more the sit on the couch and eat copious amounts of junk food type.
I liked how you talked about the war in this chapter - I've been wondering for a while what, if any, involvement Edie had in that, so it was great to find out more! I also liked the fact that you mentioned how Dean was on the run for the majority of that year and how he didn't like to talk about it. I wonder if we'll learn anymore about that time of their lives?
Edie's mum is great, which I've got a feeling I've already said before. And I love the way Edie just marches up to Jae and starts snogging him before she even says anything. She is the most magnificent OC!
This was an awesome chapter! And I agree with you about the dead-ness of the site and reviewers recently. It's really sad:(
Courtney:)Author's Response: Hello, you! Glad to see you're back. I am so excited about the reviews I've gotten in the last few days, but I feel so guilty because I've been too busy lately to return the favour :c But hopefully I will be able to have an all-day-lazyfest in which I read and review all of the things! Soon, HPFF. Soon.
Secret: Seamus is my favourite too. That scene was so much fun to write. Maybe not entirely integral to the plot, other than to show that Edie let herself fall for Oliver and start talking to people about it. But I just couldn't force myself to get rid of it! I actually had a dream the other night that I--as in, myself--was dating him. I'd say that's the beginning of the end, eh?
Yes! It was also fun to write Edie and Jae's impulsive face-smashing (as teh tarik so brilliantly called it!) She just wanted to feel like she was in control of something, and, well, she's not exactly one to think things through first...
Thanks so much for the review! ♥ They really are sparse these days... That's okay! Nerds like you and me will keep HPFF alive. Report Review
I love the idea of this story, and I think this first chapter was a great way to start it off.
Abigail is an awesome character. Yes, she seems like she's a bit of a snarky mean girl but I love how fresh and different that is! It's nice to see an OC who isn't completely perfect, for a change! And I think James kinda knew what he was talking about when he said: "It’s better than being a bunch of girls whose wands are stuck so far up their arses you can’t even see them anymore." I loved the banter between Abigail and James, by the way! Classically brilliant!
I liked the fact that Abigail seemed so confident when with her friends but, when she was alone, some of that confidence seemed to slip away and she found herself questioning herself a little bit more. I'm definitely intrigued to find out how her character will develop, and how her friends personalities will develop, too. At the moment they all seem a little bit the same, but I'm sure once you've had time to properly introduce us to them all, they'll turn out to be really exciting characters to read about.
I loved the idea of Abigail being the rope in her parent's tug of war - i think that will definitely add an interesting dimension to the story. And her bedroom at her father's house sounds amazing, what with that gorgeous view - I have to admit, I'm feeling a tad jealous right now!
I really want to learn more about Abigail's boyfriend, Blaise. From what we saw of him in this chapter, he seemed like a really nice, easy-going guy. But for all I know, he could turn out to be a complete asshat.
This was a really good start, and I'm definitely going to have to watch out for the next chapter!
Courtney:)Author's Response: Ooh, yay, I'm glad you like this so far!
As for Abigail, I was really trying to get away from the "perfect girl" stereotype, so I'm glad that that didn't go unnoticed! That comment from James was quite true, wasn't it?
There's definitely a little bit of pack mentality in Abigail, in that she's a lot more gutsy and confident around her friends and weaker by herself, and that'll come to play later on in the story. :)
I've had a couple of people say the same thing about her friends, and, looking back, I think part of that identicality was a bit intentional, to kind of show her friends as yes-men (or yes-women, I guess). They will be developed in more detail later as the story goes on, though.
Ah, Blaise. I have a lot planned for him. *cackles evilly* You'll just have to wait and see. :)
The next chapter's coming soon, I just have to edit it a little more! Thanks for the review!
Wow, I can't believe I just read the last chapter that's up! It feels so strange, to be caught up with everyone else.
Okay, so in this chapter there were A LOT of little bits and pieces that I liked and made me want to laugh and sob my eyes out and I don't know where to start (I realize that quite a few of my reviews are all over the place and probably don't make a lot of sense).
Haha, I loved how awkward James was when he asked Frank if he wanted to talk about what happened between he and Alice! And then Sirius just says: “Well, next time you piss (hope that's a 12+ word) Alice off,” Sirius began, “make sure you tell us so we can be prepared for the rest of them to be out of sorts. Common courtesy, really. Right, James?”
I also loved the line: “What Witches are Wearing?” James supplied, then instantly wished he hadn’t' because I can just imagine James blurting that out, and Sirius's reaction was just perfect!
James's thoughts about Peter and Remus both finding girlfriends and the war finally being over made me want to both laugh and cry at the same time. It feels horrible to think that the war isn't going to be over for another twenty years:(
The line: “Don’t worry, Wormtail. That’s why we’re here. To make sure no more of those bloody Death Eaters ever get the chance to talk to us.” More tragic irony! I love it and yet want to scream at the same time! I absolutely adore how you sneak lines like this into your chapters, as I've mentioned before.
And then there was the line: 'They could curse them so bad they’d have to spend the rest of the year in St. Mungo's' which just made me think of Alice and Frank:( I think I'm going to have to go back and read the Harry Potter books again with this story planted firmly in my mind. And I've just realized that this review is pretty much me quoting a heck of a lot of your magnificent lines, so sorry about that!
Oooh, the duel between Sirius and James was very intense! They are clearly very evenly matched. And McGonagall's look...I'm still not quite sure what all that was about, so now I am extremely curious!
Loved the girl's talk, which we haven't had much of for a while! Very sad that Frank and Alice had a fight, but I guess it makes them much more realistic! And Lily Evans, Head Girl and perfect student, skipping classes to talk about boys? Tut, tut, tut! I would have done exactly the same, though I'm not exactly perfect student material. And you just had to write a jam doughnut into there, didn't you? Now I am badly craving doughnuts!
This was an amazing, amazing chapter and I can't wait for the next one (I actually have to wait now - that feels really weird!)
Courtney:)Author's Response: How are you possible caught up?! You're super woman. You must be! As you know, my chapters aren't short. I can't believe you're here at the very end of the posted ones!!
All of your reviews make perfect sense and make me all mushy and happy! ♥
I hadn't written a just boys scene in a while, so it was really nice to be back with them without the girls. I know what you mean about about bad it feels knowing how much longer the war has :(. It's so sad that none of them ever see the end of it.
Hahahahh awww no I love knowing what lines you liked! Especially when they're the same ones that gave me more feels than the rest while writing it. that one about Sirius telling Peter not to worry definitely felt so bitter sweet when typing it out.
Hahahah the jam doughnut came from ME craving them, so I'm happy I've made someone else suffer along with me :P.
I'm so happy you liked this chapter, and I can't even tell you what the last 29 reviews have meant to me. Thank you so much, Courtney ♥
This was definitely not what I was expected for this chapter - it was 100 times better!
I loved that we got to have a little of Sirius's point of view at the start because I always enjoy his perspective. I love how stressed out he was getting at the prospect of going on a date with Belle, and worrying how high her expectations would be. And then he sees her just wearing plain trousers and a jumper - I could practically see him breathing a huge sigh of relief.
Poor Professor McGonagall! She actually often seems to be injured, protecting the people she cares about at Hogwarts - I hope she gets wells soon!
Love how protective Sirius is of Belle - I definitely think he forgets that she is perfectly capable of looking after herself sometimes, like we saw when she disarmed Bellatrix.
And Lily was so...Lily-ish, wanting to stay in Hogsmeade and make sure all the younger students were safe. I have to admit, I quite enjoyed Slughorn in this chapter - that description of him half waddling half running was perfect, and I got a very vivid image of him in my head
Grrr, Alrek! He's quite an unnerving character, actually, the way he is so cold and distant and focused on only one thing. I just hope that he gets caught out soon!
I'M ON TO THE LAST CHAPTER NOW! THIS FEELS SO WEIRD!
Courtney:)Author's Response: Courtney! I couldn't just give them a nice afternoon in Hogsmeade, now could I? :P
I struggle not to give Sirius too much PoV time. He's just so much fun to write, but I'm constantly reminding myself that this is more James and Lily's story than anyone. I'm so happy his relief was evident once he realized that Belle hadn't sprouted a tiara over night :P
I always try and remind myself that Slughorn isn't a bad guy. He always just sort of got on my nerves, more in the movies than the books, but I try and write him more humorous than anything. I'm really glad he played that part well in this chapter. Waddling is a gross word, isn't it? haha
I know I can't believe how quickly you got caught up! Really, can't I just reach through the screen and hug you?!
♥ Jami Report Review
Hehe, Gideon and Fabian reminded me so much of Fred and George! I definitely think they were my favourite part of this chapter - I loved Fabian's comment about the attractive barmaid working at the Three Broomsticks. I hope we get to see more of the twins!
I also loved the line: 'In many ways, she felt like a mother sending her children off to war.' Your characterization of McGonagall is really spectacular - you've really made me fall in love with her as a character!
I'm so glad that Lily suspected that Alrek might be the spy at Hogwarts! I just hope that he gets caught soon - they way Lily saw him looking at her really gave me the shivers. And the way that she realized he might have something to do with the Death Eaters was really well done, too.
Oh, and I think my favourite line of this whole chapter would have to be: "He could have invited us straight into Voldemort’s... house? People like him don’t really live in houses, do they? Lair? Lair sounds better." I can definitely not imagine Voldemort living in a house with a nice rose garden out front and perhaps a bird bath out back.
Violet is just that typical annoying mean girl. Grrr! That is all I have to say to her! I love how feisty Belle gets towards her, and how Alice and Lily have to remind her to restrain herself.
Speaking of Alice, I'd quite like to see some more Alice/Frank action. Is there any coming up, by any chance?
Remus has a date to Hogsmeade! Yay! And I hope Lily can persuade Peter to ask Ellie out (I have to keep reminding myself that Peter is not a baddie at this stage.)
Courtney:)Author's Response: Awww I'm so happy Fabian and Gideon reminded you of Fred and George! I really wanted to get a lot of them into that set of twins. I'm not sure if this has ever been said in canon or not, but it always seemed appropriate to think that Molly and Arthur named Fred and George using the same letters in honor of her brothers :).
Oh that's such an awesome thing to hear! I'll never find McGonagall easy to write. She's not like just slipping into one of the Marauders or the girls, so knowing the extra I spend to try and get her right is paying off makes me so happy!
Hahahah when my beta was reading through this he marked that line as one he liked a lot too. That sort of came from me own, 'what the hell do I call this?' feeling. And I figured if I didn't think Voldemort could really live in a house, Lily didn't either :P
Hahaha no, Peter is definitely not a baddie in this stage. I promise you'll know when that switch starts happening ;).
Thank you so much for another incredible review! ♥ Report Review
Ugh, stop writing such perfect chapters, you are making me far too jealous! On the other hand, don't stop writing such perfect chapters because I am now officially addicted to this story and your writing. I'm already dreading it being over, even though there's still a whole other book to go!
There were so many little bits and pieces I loved about this chapter (and wow, this review is taking forever to type, my fingers are so cold and numb and stiff they feel like they're about to fall off. Sorry. I just thought you might want to know that). Anyway, when Frank mentioned the werewolves, and used the words 'one' and 'it' I felt like I was going to cry at Remus's reaction! He's just too sweet and Frank's comment was so hurtful without him even realizing it! Sob!
OMG THE LINE: “I’ve known Severus most of my life,” she said, her words sharp. “He may want power, and yes he’s going about it the wrong way, but he would never lead me into something that would get me killed.” The irony! I love how you keep sneaking little pieces of foreshadowing like this into your chapters - it definitely keeps them very interesting!
Love the ending. Don't know why, I just do.
I'm so glad Belle and Sirius made up! I think you wrote Sirius absolutely perfectly in this chapter, especially when he started raging about the other members of the Black family. And I loved Belle's reaction to the Hufflepuff girl who was 'undressing him with her eyes'.
Courtney:)Author's Response: YOU are going to give me an ego the size of Texas. I'm still half convinced when people review or read my story it's because they talk to me on the forums and want to be nice or something, so I can't get over the fact that you're still reading ♥
That happens to me too, with fingers getting cold. You feel like you've been typing forever and then it's like one sentence, haha! Here, have a magic finger fixer potion. POOF!
I am a huge fan of irony, and us all knowing how their story ends gives me a lot of room to play with that. Now I just want to go tie Severus to a boat and send him to Argentina or something.
I'm so happy you liked their little talk! And I couldn't resist reminding everyone that Sirius is definitely still at the top of Hogwarts' girls lists, haha.
Ahh I'm on to your last review. You've seriously made laying in bed all night with strep throat so much better ♥ Report Review
I can't believe I'm already up to chapter 25! I have to say, I'm looking forward to being caught up with everyone else! I'm also a little amazed that I am still so hooked and captivated by this story all the way at chapter 25. Every chapter I read, I can't wait to find out what happens next!
I loved the idea of picture Lily! That was an awesome present and definitely demonstrated Lily's talent for charms! Actually, the whole of James's section was great - it was kinda nice to see a little bit of the old James shining through, especially when he heard those younger students playing exploding snap in their compartment. I also thought it was very in character how he thought: 'God, if any of his mates saw him acting like a lovesick puppy over this, they’d never let him live it down.'
Oooh, James's big revelation was that he believes someone is watching them...IT'S ALREK! I was almost pulling my hair out as he told them that - I so badly wanted to scream at them that it was Alrek who was spying on them. But alas, I do not have magical abilities and can talk through a computer screen.
I actually love how quickly Sirius snapped and assumed the spy was his brother. Out of the whole group, he has always been the one with the biggest temper, and we can see this temper shining through especially in Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, so it was great to see that teenage Sirius has a lot of this temper, too. I also liked James's description: 'Sirius was always the one to stomp about like a child if he felt even slightly off.'
Anyway, as I said, it was really nice to see Sirius lose it! I actually wanted him to punch Regulus, for being such a conceited little...probably not 12+ word so I'll restrain myself. And thought it wasn't exactly Belle's business, I do feel he overreacting a little bit by shouting at her like that - she was only trying to help, and Sirius would have done the same if their places were swapped.
I love the fact that it took practically all of his mates to calm Sirius down. And I think Sirius was very right when he said it looked like it was going to be a brilliant term. I'm excited to see what you have in store for these awesome characters!
Courtney:)Author's Response: I can't believe you're at chapter 25 either!! I really thought you'd read like the first ten chapters and be like, oh my gosh this is way too long. Totes peace out. haha. And I'm so insanely excited that the chapters are still keeping you interested!
James makes an adorable boyfriend, doesn't he? I think if Lily looks the other way, I might sneak in and take him. And Sirius. I want both. mwahaha. Greedy much?
Hahah don't pull your hair out! They're stubborn, they probably would have just looked at you like you were crazy if you managed to get through the computer. Lily would have given you detention for disturbing the peace :P
As much as I love Sirius, showing his darker side is important to me too. This is a boy who has enough of temper that he went after Peter, every intention of murdering him. Not that I'm saying Peter didn't deserve that, but most people would want to hear their friend out. All Sirius wanted to do was kill him. So showing that temper is there feels like the best way to make sure Sirius's darker side isn't ignored. And he's still gorgeous, even as a grumpy, bratty teen. :P
Courtney how am I ever going to thank you for all these amazing reviews?? I have little red hearts floating around my head! Report Review
First of all, I love the chapter image! It fits in absolutely perfectly with this chapter and all its fluffiness!
I love the idea of the girls making breakfast for the Potter's - it is such a sweet thing to do in light of all that has happened and I laughed at the descriptions of flour streaked all over Belle's face - she doesn't seem like she'd be a super domestic person. And I think that the fact that inside Lily is still thinking about the attack makes a lot of sense - she is definitely very brave, trying to keep a happy face.
Haha, another detail I liked about this chapter was when Belle screamed as she saw the cat and Alice's and Lily's reactions were great. Belle has to be one of my favourite characters - she has this awesome mix of humour and drama and depth and seriousness. And she's French!
The marauders prank was great - you had definitely got them down to the T - and I laughed when Augusta starting piling food onto Alice's plate. That seems like typical Augusta AND mother-in-law behaviour!
Lily and James's gifts to each other were perfect! James's especially was super sweet and thoughtful and the fact that everyone helped out with it really shows the bond of their friendship.
This was a lovely chapter than filled me with lots of warm fuzzies!
Courtney:)Author's Response: Isn't that the PERFECT CI?? I bookmarked that picture of Amy Adams months ago for the Christmas chapter. And heartfelt made it look so perfect all put together!
Hahah I agree, I don't think Belle would be the queen of the kitchen ;). I'm so happy she's one of your favorite characters. As much as I love writing this entire group, she definitely has a special place in my heart. So originally, she was going to be related to Fleur. Her mom was going to be Fleur's mom's sister, since we don't know much about Fleur's family tree. Then a few things happened that made it too difficult for that to happen without us ever knowing, and yeah. But I still wanted to keep her French, haha. Though every time I have to write a lot of dialogue for her, I sort of want to kick myself :P.
Hahahah I think Augusta would be the MiL from hell. Not that I don't like her, but I think she would be so overbearing. Haha. Poor Augusta :P.
I'm so happy you liked their gifts! And I'm even happier that I filled you with warm fuzzies ♥
Okay, I have to ask: first thing that shot into my mind when I started reading this chapter was the prediction about Lily and James defying the Dark Lord three times. So I'm guess this was the first defy??
I'm so glad that all of Lily and James' friends were there for them when they woke up, though I didn't expect anything less! I love the way all of their relationships are developing and it makes me even sadder to think that most of these characters end up dead or tortured to the point of insanity (sob - poor Alice and Frank.)
Dumbledore was absolutely perfect in this chapter! Your characterization of him was brilliant and i think the line: 'Lily watched as the professor’s eyes searched over them, and part of her was certain he was trying to decide on whether or not the truth was necessary. But they already knew, didn’t they?' kinda summed him up perfectly! I loved some of Sirius's comments while in Dumbledore's presence - he was clearly trying hard to hold off on the swearing!
I actually really like that you chose to end this chapter with Regulus's point of view, as we haven't seen a super huge amount of him yet. In away, his point of view was a little creepy, considering how young he really is. And I think the last line: 'Tomorrow was Christmas Eve after all, and he had his heart set on a new racing broom' was absolutely perfect and showed how young Regulus really is.
Courtney:)Author's Response: Yes! This was their first defy! According to JKR one happened before they were out of Hogwarts. She just didn't want to give our Marauders a break :(.
I'm so happy you like the relationships and friendships and how they're developing. It is so sad that we know how they all end up :(. Should I just go AU and write Voldemort jumping off a cliff or something? :P
Dumbledore is SO HARD to write. I'm so happy you liked it. It means that the billions of hours spent on him were worth it, haha.
I think we needed a step back from Bellatrix, and Regulus felt like a good way to keep it in the Black family ;). He really is so young, isn't he? I wish Sirius would have known what Regulus ended up doing. It would have been interesting to see how he reacted if he knew that his brother wasn't the boy he thought he was. At least not at the end.
On to your next completely amazing review! ♥ Report Review
I apologize (wow, I had to retype that word four types because my spelling is so crappy) in advance for how short this review is definitely going to be - a just have to get my paws on the next chapter after that HUGE cliffhanger!
There was so much awesomeness in this chapter: the Sirius, Belle, James and Lily scene: LOVE! Love, love, love. I'd say something more intelligent and in-depth but I'm in a lazy mood. Drunk Lily: love! Bellaxtrix: love!
Okay, I'm going to attempt to sound intelligent for a few seconds now. I liked reading the interaction between Bellatrix and Rodolphus, mainly because I've always seen the two of then as having zero chemistry, so that was definitely very interesting to read about! But god, all her plotting and scheming was creepy - I literally had shivers running down my spine!
No! No, no, no! You have no idea how stressed out I got when James and Lily were captured and how desperately James was trying to turn into Prongs and rescue Lily and...HOLY CRAP MY EMOTIONS ARE ALL OVER THE PLACE TODAY! But you really had me freaked out there! And then Belle and Sirius came bounding in and I forgot for a fraction of a second that Bellatrix and Sirius are related and then...
THAT ENDING! MUST. READ. MORE.
I'm just going to go now, before I end up sounding like even more of an idiot. Onto the next chapter!
Courtney:)Author's Response: Okay so obviously I know what happens after a chapter and stuff, and I knew everyone would be okay, but this was one chapter that I got really emotional while writing. Just imagining James in the situation where he was watching Lily but helpless to stop what was happening to her, and ugh. These two had to go through so much, why did JKR have to take them away from us :(! WHY!
Ugh I'm currently working on a Bellatrix short story and Rodolphus is being a pain in there. I just can't fathom how those two ended up getting married.
I'm sad/happy I had you freaked out! Obviously we know they have to live through, but I still hoped I would get some people just a bit nervous, haha!
I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'RE ALREADY THIS FAR. I was just thinking like a week ago that I couldn't wait until you got to this chapter, and now you're here! And you're reviewing them all and oh my gosh THANK YOU.
♥ Report Review
THIS. CHAPTER. WAS. AMAZING. That is all that really needs to be said in this review, but I'll waffle on anyway and try to sound like I'm semi intelligent.
There was so many wonderful things about this chapter. The whole thing was wonderful but that's not really the point. SO MUCH JAMES AND LILY FLUFFINESS! And gah, James was so adorable, offering to get two rooms at the hotel.
Loved loved LOVED the dinner scene with Vernon and Petunia. James' reaction to Vernon was great - I adore how protective of Lily he is. And Vernon was so...Vernon-ish, in the worst possible way.
Now, onto Belle and Sirius. Now THAT is what I call drama. Belle's parents really are awful - I don't blame Sirius for losing it. How could they bring in Christophe? How could they do that to their daughter! Gr, I honestly felt like screaming in that section!
God, I was so glad when Sirius punched Christophe and glad that Belle showed some guts towards her parents. And Belle and Sirius kissed! Yay! I'm so happy right now!
You can probably tell I enjoyed this chapter A LOT. And sorry if it makes no sense whatsoever or is utter garbage, I'm still so full of excitement from reading it and have this huge dorky grin all over my face. I can't wait to see what happens next!
Courtney:)Author's Response: Hahahah you're reviews always sound intelligent ;)! Probably much more so than my responses!
I loved writing all the James and Lily fluffiness in this! I'm so happy you liked that James wanted to get them two hotel rooms. It seemed fitting for him not to want to make Lily feel pressured or anything ;).
Eeek I'm so happy you liked Vernon. Him and Petunia would just be such a joy to have as siblings, wouldn't they? :P
Ahh I'm so happy you liked their kiss! It was never actually planned for them to kiss at the end of this, but then it just felt so right! And eek thank you so much for all your sweet comments on it! ♥
Thank you so much for your amazing reviews, Courtney! I can't even explain how much I just want to hug you! Report Review
Aaaah, amazing chapter!
The Bellatrix bath scene: I approve! Not that you need my approval obviously, I just felt like slipping that in there. I don't think I've actually ever read a bath scene in fanfiction so it was a very unusual (and creepy) experience. You write Bellatrix so well in all her insanity and creepiness. I loved the fact that she had to be in control, that she was testing herself by burning herself on hot water, staying under water for as long as possible. Give me your villain writing talent!
I loved loved LOVED the scene between Lily and Sirius! I don't why but the whole time I was reading it I just kept think of how Sirius got falsely accused of the murder of Lily and James and of all those years he had to spend in Azkaban and I just wanted to bawl my eyes out! And then you mentioned Peter's crappy dad and I felt even worse! In the best possible way!
Love the little scene between Sirius and James and James' parents (who are the best, by the way). I love (overkill of that word, I know) how easily Sirius is able to fit in and how Olivia and William see him as a second son.
I also enjoyed the scenes at Alice's house. It was definitely interesting, to say the least, to get a little glimpse into her life. Her parents seem like very stuffy people - it's a wonder Alice turned out so normal!
I am definitely looking forward to the next chapter - luckily I don't have to look forward for very long because I am going to read it right now!
Courtney:)Author's Response: I don't think I realized how odd writing her in the bath was until after I wrote it, haha. But I really liked the idea of her testing her own control though, even somewhere that most people feel relaxed. Poor crazy Bellatrix :P
Hahah I'm so happy you like how I write the baddies! It's definitely got to be a bit of an addiction.
I knowww isn't it so sad to think how someone who loved his friends so much, and cared so much had to pay for their death? Bah now I'm getting all sad!
When I first started this I had a hard time trying to figure out what to do with Alice's parents. We know they aren't involved in Neville's life at all, so something happened with them. I didn't want to kill them because we already had to say goodbye to Lily's parents, and eventually James's ;(. So that's kind of the base of their characterization. Their not bad people, just very engrossed in their own lives.
Can I just say how shocked I am that you're still reading this? I wish I could reach through my computer and hug you!
Haha, I love the fact that James and Sirius shorted Butterscotch's name to 'Scotch'- that definitely seems like something they would do and I loved how Lily was so disapproving of their little nickname.
And she referred to James as her boyfriend! *squeals dramatically* I'm so excited!
It was quite nice to have a little section from McGonagall's point of view in this chapter - I love how worried she is about James and Lily and her thoughts on having the Hogwarts castle much emptier than usual. It was definitely a great addition to the chapter, and I actually really like the way you characterize McGonagall!
I also like the way you ended this chapter with the friends all together, chatting away as the headed home for the holidays. And I was definitely having some strong Jily feels in this chapter! I think Christmas with the Potters would be a very lively, warm affair, and I am definitely looking forward to reading about it!
Courtney:)Author's Response: Hahaha it seems pretty appropriate for James and Sirius to want to shorter Butterscotch's name into that, doesn't it? ;)
Hahaha yay!! I love dramatic squeals!!
Writing McGonagall is still such a scary thing for me. She's nearly as scary as Dumbledore. But at the same time, I love what she can do for a chapter. And I figure I'll be writing her a lot more in book two so I better toughen up and practice now ;).
Anything on the train is always fun for me to write. Just that feeling you get from the leaving Hogwarts or coming back to Hogwarts... it was always my favorite part of the books. Well, maybe not favorite, but one of them :P
Okay, I seriously hope these responses are making sense. They make sense in my head, but as I mentioned I have strep throat so I might just be talking nonsense. Haha.
Thank you so much, Courtney!! ♥
Wow, it has been about a week since I have reviewed this story, and boy do I miss it! I was really enjoying this holidays, actually, with all that spare time in which I could sit down on the couch with my laptop and a pile of food and read and write until my heart was content. Now I have zero time and I'm so glad to be back to this magnificent story!
The idea of Lily actually enjoying her detentions made me laugh. She really is such a great character and I love the way you have developed each aspect of her personality. She seems like a very precise sort of person, especially in this chapter. I think she would make a very good Healer!
Oooh, Remus! The way you described his injuries really made me wince and Lily's reactions when she saw him were perfect. It was clear that Remus was extremely uncomfortable with the situation, but Lily kept pressing his anyway, determined to find out the truth and to help her friend, rather than let him suffer on his own. I honestly felt so sorry for Remus in this chapter and was happy when he sort of told Lily the truth.
And then, when Lily went out and began to cry for everything that Remus had been through, I actually realized my own eyes were watering, which shows just how great a writer you really are! I love how compassionate she is and I also love that we got to see a bit more of the Remus/Lily friendship in this chapter, because I've always seen the two of them as having reasonably similar personalities - at least in some respects.
The Belle and Sirius scene was great, too. I liked the addition of Sirius' story about he left home and I extremely curious about this scar of his, now. I think it is fair to say that I am looking forward to reading about the Christmas holidays - with Sirius and Belle going to France and James and Lily going to the wedding, it should definitely be interesting, to say the least!
Courtney:)Author's Response: Courtney! You are spoiling me so much!!! I'm laying in bed with strep throat and feel so pathetic, that having all your amazing reviews is such an awesome treat ♥
I like what you said about her being a precise sort of person, and completely agree. I'm so happy that you like how I'm developing her. She was one of the most intimidating parts about starting this story, but now that I'm at the point where she sort of writes herself, I really enjoy working on her.
I don't like the whole, I'm a werewolf, chapters in the Marauders fics. I think that Remus would have done everything he could not to tell her, even if she already knew. So making it clear that she knows, and that he knows that she knows, but not really having him give her an answer felt like the best way to go. And I totally agree with what you said about them having similar personalities. I think they do, too.
Aww I wish I could say I was sorry for making you tear up, but I'd be lying :P.
Now that you're passed the Christmas chapters, you know just how interesting it was ;). And Sirius seems like someone who would wear scars well, doesn't he? Not that I want him to have them, but I think it would just enhance his dangerous sort of feeling. Okay, I'm done gushing over Sirius. Really, half the time i'm tempted to change Belle's name to Jami ;).
Thank you so much for another amazing review ♥ Report Review
I definitely think you were right in leaving out the actual conversation between Belle and Sirius. Starting this chapter with the aftermath of their conversation, from Sirius' point of view, was a great way to pick up the story. You have this real flare with using different narrative devices to keep your plot interesting and original. I love the fact that sometimes (like when Sirius told his friends about the night of Lily's parents' death) you have a flashback rather than explaining the whole thing and that you skip less important, less interesting parts of the story effectively, and carry on from a suitable point. It means that your story is never dull to read, never has a dull moment.
I loved the fact that there was Sirius/James in this chapter! The way you portray their friendship is awesome and their personalities are just perfect! It's clear that Sirius has quite a bit of anger bottled up inside him and we all know that Sirius has a bit of a temper, so that's awesome to see. And I'm glad you added in that bit about the two boys matching stubborness for stubborness and then Remus and Peter having to act as mediators, because that reminded me a lot of me and one of my best friends, which made me laugh. We're both so stubborn that, if we have a different opinion, we can't find a halfway point and can argue for hours at a time.
I'm actually quite surprised Sirius ran away from Belle, though. Obviously her wouldn't exactly take her story well, but I do wish he would've acted a tad more...maturely about it. I hope the two of them are able to make up soon!
Abigail is horrible! She is like that classic female bully but she also happens to be a Slytherin who seems to hate muggleborns. That encounter with the Slytherins was really well written, and I'm so glad Lily stood her ground. You have a real talent for writing the bad guys!
I think the scene with McGonagall, Slughorn and Dumbledore was great, too. The addition of Slughorn's night cap was great - if I was Lily I probably would've burst out laughing and then would've ended up looking quite the idiot.
Anyway, another great chapter!
Courtney:)Author's Response: Hi Courtney ♥
With a story this long, hearing that it never gets dull is such a huge compliment! Thank you! I really love getting to play in the different heads of the characters. Sirius is one of my favorites. He's such a... chaotic person. Haha. I was really worried though that people were going to be angry they didn't get to see the entire conversation; i'm so happy you liked it this way! It just would have felt so redundant. We know what happened to Belle... and I can never write that much french accent again as I had to for her chapter, HHAHA!
I love that it reminded you of you and your best friend! I'm really not stubborn at all. Like, I'll have things that I get stubborn about, but for the most part I'm pretty, 'whatev,' so writing these two and how bullheaded they both can be is so much fun for me. And the fact that you were able to relate to that makes me think I'm doing a decent job at making it realistic! Yay!
I know, Sirius definitely didn't act his best in this :(. I think he'll redeem himself for his actions very soon, though ;).
I had so much fun writing Lily and the boys getting in trouble together. Especially with it being Lily that was sort of at the center of it all. I think she can be portrayed as almost too Hermioneish at times, and I want to show that, as good of a student and person as she is, that doesn't mean she's able to hold herself back all the time and walk away from an altercation.
And I totally would have laughed out loud too, haha. I got called into the principals office during HS once because I'd gone into the teacher's lounge and filled my coffee up (I did this all the time, but a new teacher who had a power trip apparently had an issue with it and told on me), and I was getting a lecture about what happens if every student did that and blah blah, and behind the principal was a window and outside of the window was a couple going to town on snogging. I started laughing SO HARD.
Okay, sorry, got off topic there. haha.
Thank you again for another absolutely amazing review ♥ Report Review
Hey there! So, I finally got around to reading your magnificent entry for my challenge! Sorry about the delay!
This was a really cute piece of writing! I loved your characterizations of all the characters, especially Sirius. I loved how dramatic he was, and I think you used the quote you were given perfectly - it seemed like such a Sirius thing to say! I think my favourite line had to be: “Ah, MacDonald, so little faith. But no, we aren’t,” Sirius replied, throwing an arm around her shoulders. That was just perfect!
I also liked how you added the discussion of the war, and how Peter seemed to be uncertain of whether he wanted to fight. It was sort of chilling, hearing all these characters who become a part of the Order of the Phoenix discussing the war, especially when they all end up dead (sob!)
Another little bit that made me laugh was this bit: “My parents told me—” The three boys snorted and he rolled his eyes and conceded, “Okay. I overheard my parents talking about how they wanted to start an organisation, like Voldemort’s—” Not only did we get a small glimpse into the beginnings of the order, but that such a James thing to say, and made me laugh.
I loved the Jily feels at the end of the chapter, and their discussion was so perfect! It definitely made me a little sad, hearing their hopes that the world would be a better place for their kids but I loved the way you ended this chapter.
Courtney:)Author's Response: Hello! :D
Don't worry about the delay, there was never any rush. :)
I'm so glad you liked it! As soon as I read the quote, I actually screamed: "SIRIUS!" :p
I felt like our poor Marauders didn't really have a very fun childhood, so I wanted to throw that in there. :'(
ahaha James was a mischievous little bugger, we all know that. And I could imagine him eavesdropping on his parents ahaha. :p
hehe what's a Jily fanfic without sad Jily feels? :p
Thank you for this lovely review, and thanks for putting out the challenge! :D Report Review
Hey there! Thank you so much for entering my challenge with this awesome piece and now, without further ado, I am here for my review. OH MY GOD! I just realized that rhymed! Go me!
Ahem. Sorry, I'm in a weird mood. Well, I'm always in a weird mood, but...
This was such a cute little one-shot! I actually adored it and my heart is melted like a scoop of ice cream on a hot day!
I loved how Ron practiced his speech in front of Harry - that was very funny and definitely something I can see Ron doing. I loved how in this one-shot, you not only showed the relationship between Ron and Hermione, but between Harry and Ron, too. I loved how though Harry was supporting Ron with all his heart, he was still mocking him a little, too. And it was very funny how Ron grudgingly admitted that Harry was better at all the romance stuff.
You have amazing comedic timing, has anyone ever told you that? You manage to slip in these little funny but random moments at exactly the right time that really make me laugh. Some of my favourites were the idea of Ginny squealing and crying which were then blamed on pregnancy hormones and Harry staying in the kitchen with Ron to make sure he didn't burn the house down.
I think you used the quote I gave you really well, and Ron's proposal was so sweet! It was an added bonus that you managed to use it twice;)
I loved this one-shot, and I can't really fault it. Oh, and before I forget, I loved the fact that you added little details about Ron and Hermione's home and their life - like the fact that Hermione had gone back to study her N.E.W.T's, while Ron had decided that wasn't the option for him.
Great writing lovely!
Courtney:)Author's Response: Thank you so much for such a lovely review and for giving me such a lovely quote to work with. Yours was the first challenge I had ever written for so I'm glad you enjoyed it (laughing at the heart melting like a scoop of ice cream part haha!)
I always imagined that the trio would remain very close even years after the war so as soon as I started writing this I knew that Harry would be a big part of this. Plus, lets face it, there's no way Ron could have done it alone!
No one has ever told me I have good comedic timing but I take it as a huge compliment, personally I think I'm hilarious haha! I'm glad that I got across the lightheartedness that I wanted to in this story.
The quote you gave me was so adorable, I couldn't resist not using it more than once :D
Again, thank you for the review and for the challenge, I'm looking forward to reading some of the other entries :)
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