Reading Reviews From Member: Jchrissy
851 Reviews Found

Review #1, by JchrissyDetox: Epilogue

1st July 2017:
I'm sorry, but this is going to be short and incoherent. I just spent three hours with wine and reading this story from start to finish. And I'm a mess. You're amazing with Harry and that gang, but nothing gets my feels like your ability to write Draco and Astoria. So many things I'd completely forgetten, this was so amazing to get to read in one sitting. I love these people. I love you for giving me these people. So. So. Much.

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Review #2, by JchrissyTales of the Death Hunters: Shades of Anger: Malice

6th October 2014:
You know what one of the best parts about reading your writing is? You don't leave out things that are vital to creating a full world, ever. Whatever the situation calls for, you let it unfold just how it should for the characters your giving us. Remember the way Esme was first introduced into Harry's life back in CoB? Well, obviously, you created it. I'm sure you realized there might be some people opposed to you giving Harry a female pre/during Ginny that caught his eye, but not only did you make it a realistic situation in which Harry and Esme bonded, but you did something that made him really human. In this story, Kaspar isn't being made more human by his actions with Mary, but instead of glossing over what he would be trying to do to her, feeling, wanting, you make it clear the kind of person he is my putting emphasis on it. Or I suppose, you made it clear the kind of monster it is.

Hi, by the way ;). I hope you knew you'd see me back in this little review box eventually!

I can't say this was the best thing to read in the middle of the night, but I can't even be sorry for that because it was such an incredible start. Knowing we're starting a new journey with these three, and knowing the insane amount of talent you have at portraying our group, is such an awesome feeling. No one does the trio better than you, m'dear.

You made Kaspar feel like like one of many during the war, one of the people who weren't quite part of Voldemort's circle, but who genuinely enjoys inflicting pain, destroying lives, and doesn't think twice about killing. I am one of those people who HATES when things are skipped to the 'happily ever after' without REALLY getting to see how we get there, so seeing you start a new story on the clean up of the war aftermath is so exciting!!!

Author's Response: Jami! I was worried I might never hear from you again, my dear. What a wonderful surprise.

Gritty, detailed reality is my middle name. Not really. That would be a ridiculous middle name. But I appreciate your compliment. You can't be afraid to include the bad parts of a story with the good. Life can be harsh and ugly, especially when the stakes are high and the "bad guys" are devoid of empathy and morals. Kaspar is an awful, awful human being. The sort who would have traveled from Germany to the UK to join the Death Eaters because Voldemort's ideals appealed to his ego and his belief in magical supremacy. He might seem like a monster, but you haven't truly seen a monster yet. Wait til the next chapter...

Yeah, I could see how this would not be great late-night reading material. But fear not, Ron and Harry will be there to save the day! Thank you for that compliment on the trio. It means a great deal. :)

I'm like you, I don't think there was an instant "happily ever after" once Voldemort's lifeless body hit the flagstones on the Great Hall. I imagine that the fight to purge Britain of his followers and their ideals went on for some time. I'm going to try my hardest to capture some of those moments in this series.

It's really, really awesome to see you back again! Thanks so much for reading and reviewing!

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Review #3, by JchrissyAcanthus: A Kaleidoscope

3rd September 2013:
This is going to be a pathetic short review, but tonight is the first free evening I've gotten and I want to review this amazing chapter before I go to sleep and get swiped back up into family time :P

I can not wait to figure out what this sand storm has done! Rose felt so disoriented, and you portrayed that really well throughout this chapter. I loved the way she sort of slipped in and out, and especially that you kept the confusions feeling as real to her as it does to us.

Even though we just got this short amount of time with them, I'm already excited to get to know these OC's! I have a soft sport or Charlotte but I'm not sure why yet :P

I felt so bad for Rose at the end of this. You really made her worry feel genuine, and the way she deducted that it had to have taken then back in time was so clever!

Okay, I'm so sorry again for this length, but it isn't any reflection on the chapter because I LOVED it.


Author's Response: Jami! I know how you feel given that my time spent on HPFF was seriously limited this summer, so don't worry at all!

Erm, whether the sandstorm had anything to do with Rose disappearing is yet to be revealed, but I like your predictions! I'm really glad that you found that her confusion real because it was quite a weird feeling to describe so I wasn't sure if I was hitting it or not.

I know how you feel because I have biography written for each of them I'm so excited about them :P Charlotte will appear a lot more, so don't worry about that!

Rose will improve a lot, so don't worry. I can't really say much but don't think is it is probably my best advice.

Don't worry at all about the length, I'm just touched that you made it over here with the business of your holiday! Thanks for an amazing review :D


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Review #4, by JchrissyIn A Heartbeat: In A Heartbeat

3rd September 2013:

You really cleaned up the confusion we talked about in your first scribbly, even though that was still awesome, but this has the perfect blend of abstract while still being a story. If that makes sense.

Dude, you don't mess with a mother. You don't mess with a Weasley. You DEFINITELY don't mess with the WEASLEY MOTHER. Bellatrix picked the wrong red headed matriarch to try and tackle, and I sort of with she'd have lived for just a few minutes longer so we could see how she took to being killed by Molly. THough I guess she couldn't have been lived and killed at the same time...hmph.

Your emotions in this were so dang powerful. I felt like I was right there going, 'no Molly! That's not how it's going to end! Get her Molly!' then when the real future finally unfolded, gah. You are too perfect.

Okay, I know this is a terribly short excuse for a review, but I had to come squee. I MISS AND LOVE YOU.

Author's Response: I can't help being perfect, I was born this way! :P

I'm so glad the confusion is gone. Sometimes it's just so hard to know how to express the image you have in mind... And it's also hard to fix it when you know something's wrong, but you've only just written it and the words are still new. So thanks for reading it and helping out :)

I know what you mean about Bella's death! I wanted her to suffer for a little longer too, but you have to take comfort in the way JKR wrote that shock is evident on her face - she realises what has happened. Defeated by a plump, freckled housewife who is one hundred times the woman and warrior she could ever be. She totally underestimated the power of motherly love, thinking her obsessional love for Voldemort is stronger than any other. Ha, sucker.

Thank you for squeeing! I miss and love you too!!! Back to normal life this week!

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Review #5, by JchrissyDetox: Climbing Back

3rd September 2013:
I seriously love the changes you ended up making in this. I'm sure I've said this on all the others, but this chapter really might be my favorite. Seeing Draco's emotions on such a thin string felt perfect. From snapping at work and cursing the doxi, although I guess it wasn't as much snapping since he was told to. But anyway, he wasn't planning on using that curse then his ability to handle our lovely half loopy boss brought out that sort of fire in him.

I'm going to back up to Astoria's section, which you know I loved. God, you couldn't pay me enough to be that age again. She's so sad and broken, I just want to hug her. I felt like you really had a good dynamic going with her parents. It's obvious that they have a certain type of standards that they live by, and a certain way a pureblood wife treats her husband, but she still stood up for what she thought was right concerning her daughter and I just love that.

You really havea a knack for Narcissa. She sort of levels Draco in a way that we see Astoria can too, more so in CoB though. Maybe that saying about men going for women like their mother's isn't all just talk? But unlike Narcissa, Astoria has managed to grow up a much more whole person who can stick up for herself... something it doesn't seem Narcissa learns until her later years.

I really felt bad for Lucius in this chapter, and that's something that doesn't happen often. Draco has been so angry at his father lately, and we understand why. But it's kept him from seeing how unhealthy Lucius really is. Ugh, why do you have to give me sad Malfoy family feels?!

OH now I really want to know who the bad boys have been meeting with if it's obviously not Lucius!!! And that ending! You better get to writing Mister, and I mean soon!

Author's Response: Last unanswered review! Yay!

I'm really glad you liked the changes sophie suggested. Before, I think I was sort of rushing Draco toward a certain point where I needed him to be, not really being completely mindful of how he was getting there. To me, it feels a lot more natural now. Draco is running on fumes emotionally in this chapter. Everything he's been working to build was taken from him when Astoria stormed off at the end of Daphne's wedding reception and now he's tolerating Madam Blishwick and her bizarre fascination with dark magic solely because "Malfoys don't give up" or something like that. All in all, it was a recipe for a meltdown.

Astoria definitely saddled up the Drama Llama in this chapter and went for a ride. I keep reminding myself that she's only 16, so she's going to have her moments of "woe is me, the world is coming to an end!!!" This was one of them. But her mother shows her a dim light somewhere farther up the tunnel. I always had in the back of my mind that Astoria's mother was stronger than she first seemed. And I've developed a strange fascination with trying to figure out the social dynamics of pureblood marriages.

Narcissa is fun to write! I just wish she'd stop stealing every scene she ends up in. Astoria does have a lot in common with her. As much as he tries to act like his father, Draco is a total mama's boy.

I was trying to hint earlier in the story that old Lucius wasn't doing well. In this chapter, I finally put all the cards on the table. I didn't really mean for people to feel bad for him. He's certainly done plenty to earn his lot in life. But I guess it doesn't really bother me, either.

I'm writing, I'm writing! Just had to take a little break to get that Puzzle story out of my system. 1,300 words down, lots more to go...

Thanks for all your support and encouragement! ::Hugs:: ♡ ♥ ♡ ♥ ♡ ♥

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Review #6, by JchrissyThe Puzzle: Fun for the Whole Family

3rd September 2013:
Daniel, I swear, your comedy brain is one of my favorites.

I was pretty curious where you were going with this and how the title would fit in with the summary. Then especially curious when we learned it was Lily's birthday.

I LOVE that you didn't ever have Lily in any sort of amazement over her present. She does a decent job pretending, but her adolescent girl comes across loud and clear and I don't know of any almost preteen that would be over the moon about a puzzle :P!

I think my favorite part of this would have to be the bickering between Ginny and Dudley. Or I guess Ginny's attacks on Dudley, haha! I think I like her the best after she's had a few too many :P. And the deal they made about who got to indulge in what depending on whose family members were there was so perfect! That and the constant battle between Kreacher and Molly over who would do the hosting :P

The family dynamics were done so well in this. You can tell that you've spent plenty of time among the craziness of it :P

This was such a fun story; your sense of humor is one of my favorite things about your writing. You always make it funny without even seeming like you have to try! Thank you for putting a huge smile on my face, and now I'm headed to Detox!

Author's Response: My comedy brain likes to make an appearance at the oddest times, like when I should be finishing the next chapter of Detox, for instance.

The whole story started with the idea of the puzzle. We all know how paintings behave in the magical world, and I was working a puzzle with the kids and I started to wonder. The problems that the inhabitants of a magical puzzle would face seemed rather dire, in a way. So I had my germ of an idea, I just needed a story to put around it. This definitely didn't seem like the sort of present Harry would be buying for James or Albus, so poor Lily took one for the team. I agree that it wouldn't have made any sense to see a ten-year-old-going-on-22-year-old girl being gaga over a puzzle, so I deliberately kept her reaction muted.

I've always imagined Ginny as being the sort of wife who would have taken to heart all of the anger that Harry should have felt toward the Dursleys. Which is not to say that Harry didn't feel angry at them, just not as angry as Ginny probably thought he should have been. So mixing her with alcohol and throwing in a dollop of Dudley seemed like a very volatile combination. I'm sure Molly never would have been able to handle sharing her kitchen with a house elf, and even sharing somebody else's kitchen with an elf as weird as Kreacher was surely a trial for her.

I'm really glad that you enjoyed it. It was nice to take a break from grumpy Draco and weepy Astoria for a while. But now it's back to the grind. Thanks for reading and reviewing!

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Review #7, by JchrissyCluedo: Snakes

3rd September 2013:
Hi lovely!

Lily's outburst in this chapter was awesome. I love that not only was she yelling at the about how she was done hearing about Quidditch, but she could prove how much she'd had to hear by reciting it! That was awesome and I was seriously grinning!

The bit of bickering you have between friends always makes me smile. They feel natural together, and I'm seriously falling in love with your Narcissa!

Also, the fact that you had James asking Henry to tell him about himself seriously felt in character. Just as in-character as the fact that we could practically feel him chomping at the bit to follow up on the lead.

This was another awesome chapter, darling! I'm so excited to see the revelation behind the cliffy!

Author's Response: Jami! Sorry it took me so long to respond dear, I've kinda been living life as a hermit for the past month or so :P

Lily in my head is the type to just go with whatever the conversation is about, but after 7 years, I'm pretty sure she's had enough of Quidditch. Not the sport per se, but the boys' constant talk of players, stats and plays that she has no idea about but had to pick up.

There's no point being friends with someone if you can't banter about with them and tease them ;) I do love Narcissa, she's slowly becoming one of my favourite characters to write and I can't honestly believe that there was a time when I didn't even contemplate writing her.

Yes, James' manners have a slight precedence over most of his characteristics, including his impatience- something that he wasn't great at showing for most of his time at Hogwarts, in particular around Snape and Lily.

Thanks so much for the lovely review! I'll have to get writing then :D

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Review #8, by JchrissyThe Last Few Steps: ek~

1st September 2013:
Hi darling!!! Sorry again about the lateness of this!!

Oh my gosh. This poor girl really isn't winning the 'best life' award right now, is she? I love how you started this at such a chaotic point in her life. Harry leaving her for the Ch person and the new baby, then it being even worse with them staying with her until they get settled in a flat! Talk about adding insult to injury!

I love how humorous her narrative is. And the kind of funny where it isn't trying to shove one liners down your throat but still so full of awesome OMG moments.

Nisha has such a great personality so far. Not overly nice but not some total jerk. She has a super loveable feeling around here where you can kind if sense she's a train wreck and just want to hug her because of it, haha!

Your writing in this is really smooth and so easy to get into. I think first person is a hard point of view to master, but you write it so flawlessly!! I can imagine what's going on so clearly but you didn't add in too many descriptions to make it feel bogged down of anything.

I absolutely love this first chapter! I hope you continue!

Also,,just in case this new archives messes with my user name, this is Jami :P

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Review #9, by JchrissyBig: That Feeling

12th August 2013:
Hi lovely! This was such an emotional chapter!

I really, really love the sort of separate character you gave 'That Feeling.' It was it's own thing in this one shot, that thing that keeps George stuck in that miserable place without even wanting/trying to get better. That was such a creative way to give his emotions a very personification, and i loved it!

I also liked the struggle it was for George to get back in the shop, and really liked the small mention of alcohol being Charlie's way to drown sorrows.

The comparison of it draping him like a child in a coat too big was so awesome, another really cool but of personification!!

Then the emotional move George made to understanding, with Angelina's help, that it wasn't JUST him. He wasn't the only one who lost, wasn't the only one who was hurting, all felt so realistic. I loved the easy way about one another you gave the two of them, and how comforting it just felt for them to be together.

There were a a few grammatical issues, like:
George said: do you want to come in? and Angelina said: Could you do with an extra pair of hands?

These would still need to be divided into different lines. The colon is technically correct, but in this case you'd be better off smoothing it out with a comma. Like:

George said. Do you want to come in?

Angelina didn't answer the question directly, but instead replied with, "Could you do with an extra pair of hands?"

Just small things like that :)! Your writing improves every time I read it, m'dear!!!

Author's Response: Thank you very much for stopping by again, Jami, your reviews honestly make my day and I am so lucky to have such an awesome reviewer like you! :)

Hahah, thank you! I really tried to personify the emotion to try and portray how it really feels to lose someone that close to you. I think George would've had to see the emotion like an enemy and a best friend, and he would've spent all day every day feeling it at first.

Everyone forgets about Charlie! Charlie is awesome too! I'm so glad you picked that comparison out, because I was so pleased when it came to me :)

I had to think of a way that George and Angelina would kind of click -- and I admit, I did reread the first few chapters of Before They Fall just to see how two people that hadn't seen each other for a while and kind of had feelings for each other conversed -- and how George could eventually stop blaming himself and empathise with Angelina.

That does look much smoother! I just wanted an excuse to use a colon, hahah! I will definitely read over it and help smooth it over to make it flow better! Thanks for pointing that out!

It was so lovely to hear from you again Jami, thank you so much! You're awesome!

-Sophie :D

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Review #10, by JchrissyAcanthus: Before the Storm

11th August 2013:
I can't believe I missed this chapter for so long! I thought I'd poke by just to check, and boom! Yay!

I LOVE Lorcan. He's kind, easy going, doesn't seem t have set boundaries, and really the dynamic between the three canon characters is amazing.

The start with the sand storm conversation began us with a perfect, eerie sort of feeling. We knew it would be coming, though part of me thought you were just trying scare us... I was pretty certain it would come.

Rose waking in the night and the storm almost seeming soft until she realizes what those little grains can do gave the story such an awesome shot of adrenaline! Things really sped in this chapter, both with the action and with painting us readers a clear picture of where Scorpius and Rose (love) are in terms of their relationship/friendship.

This is a small detail, but I really liked Scorpius's mention of why he had to get out and how overbearing his mum was. I can see that :P

Aww Kiana I feel like this was the start to a really amazing adventure! I wish you'd get yourself back in town so I can see what's on the other end of that cliffie you left us!!!

Author's Response: Jami! I'm sorry this has taken so long to reply to! Being laptop free really sucks!

I'm so glad that you liked Lorcan because he's going to be around for a lot more!

Haha, foreshadowing is such a fun technique! I'm really glad that you found it worked and that it matched up with Rose's section. The storm was a lot of fun too, so I'm glad you liked it!

Bahaha, I sort imagined her to be Narcissa when writing her! I'm back in about a week, so I can finally updated this story! Thank you for this wonderful review, Jami! :D

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Review #11, by JchrissyYou. (Me).: You. (Me).

9th August 2013:
Hi darling! We're totally on the same brain wave and writing odd Victoire one shots together, haha!!

I was really, really curious as to the conflicting thoughts (I know next to nothing about mythology) and LOVED when we learned it was both Teddy viewing her and her viewing her at the same time.

His thoughts seem to exemplify everything she dislikes about herself. He's thinking of how perfect she is, hurt that she doesn't see it, but he's thinking of her face, her outer shell, seeing the things he love about her just as she sees them and hates them. It was such a cool twisting, and I loved reading it a second time after figuring out just what was going on!

This was an really cool story. Your writing gets better every single time I read it, and I love the writing style you explored with this. Heavy descriptions and metaphors are so perfect for a shorter piece like this, and you used them all to benefit and enhance what you were saying.

Awesome story, m'dear!

Author's Response: It's another Jami review! ♥ Haha, great minds think alike!

I don't know anywhere near as much mythology as I should, but Victoire and Teddy seemed to work well for this, fitting with the myth and the story. I'm so pleased you liked the conflicting thoughts and the way that they were both viewing her at the same time.

You somehow always manage to pick up on what I hope readers will! I really wanted to highlight the differences in the way that they viewed her beauty, and twist the myth around a bit with Victoire actually hating her beauty rather than being in love with it.

Wow, thank you so much! It really means a lot to me that you think I'm improving! Thank you Jami!

Sian :)

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Review #12, by JchrissySpies: Trading Places

8th August 2013:
Ohhh I LOVE Peter in this. Okay, you know how we have to tweak parts of canon to sort of save ourselves? I'm sure you had to mess with a few things in Diamonds into Coal to make it more of a story you want to tell. Anyway, Peter is my canon tweak. I have to change a bit about him to be able to handle what he does, but this portrayal of yours is probably one of the most honest I've read.

He knew what they were up against. He didn't want to die. He didn't want to be on the losing team, and there was just enough separation between him and the group (that I"m guessing only grew, at least that's what I pick up from your story) that he was *okay* doing what he did. Your take on him isn't apologetic, it's not regretful, it's simple. Maybe he has those small flashes of regret throughout his life, but he made a decision to live and he's going to do whatever he damn well has to, to live.

I just really loved what you did with him.

Snape felt just like he always does with you. He's Severus. You keep him intense, you keep him bordering on dark, but he's focused on Lily and mainly Lily. Which I really, really like. I also like that he didn't seem interested in Harry until he met his eyes, Lily's eyes. That was another perfect thing to focus on, imo.

Obviously you made a few adjustments to what happened with Harry, but I really liked this. I also REALLY loved the celebratory party that isn't really one even if they don't know it yet. Wondering just how everyone found out and how they all reacted from the DE side really intrigues me. In the short bit of that you showed, it was almost manic.

I think your writing style was some of your best in this. You did the gorgeous work with descriptions that you're so well known for, but you let your story take the lead. You didn't put your characters or story second to description, and let the latter flicker in when it was natural.

This is probably one of my favorite pieces of yours, miss Amanda! Like I said, even if I won't be able to go the way you have with Peter, I think it's definitely the most true. Awesome job on some insanely difficult characters!

Author's Response: Jami, thanks again for the lovely swap :)

Yeah, I definitely understand that feeling. I try to stick to canon as much as I can, but of course there are little moments you have to change in order to make your story your own and to make it something you're happy with.

It's funny how much our perceptions of Peter differ. For me, that moment of separation, the first time Peter ever doubted that his friendship with the others wouldn't be enough, that's the hardest thing ever to write about him. This was much easier because it was already there. I tried to write it in Post Scriptum--well, sort of tried to write around it a little, I guess--and I don't know that I'll ever be totally satisfied with it. So I guess thinking of Peter before his betrayal is tougher for me. Anyway, yeah, I'm glad you liked my version and felt like I made a bold choice.

As much as I like Snape, I have to accept that he's not a good person without his affection for Lily. It only felt right to have that clearly being his entire motivation throughout this story. Again, this was easier than Post Scriptum because his betrayal was in motion. It was even tougher for me to figure out how to show his changeover from trying to be with Lily to trying to be a Death Eater in the novel. And again, don't know quite how I feel about it. Glad you liked the detail about Harry's eyes!

I guess what it boils down to is that these are both interesting, complex characters, and part of what I love about them is that there are so many different permutations that different authors can choose and they're all awesome :)

The ending of this was kind of interesting for me. I wanted to focus on the calm before the storm--the Death Eaters are celebrating, thinking they're home free, and the Order is grieving the loss of the Potters and wondering what in the world to expect next while not really understanding what happened to Voldemort and why Harry's still alive. I thought it would be a cool moment to describe given that we're more familiar with the aftermath based on what we know from canon. I'm happy that you liked my choice!

Aww, thanks! I really think this is my best one-shot to date and possibly my best story. It felt really good to write this and I'm happy that you also felt like it turned out to be good. Thanks so much for your awesome review!


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Review #13, by JchrissyWhen They Fell: Prologue

7th August 2013:
Hi there!

Wow, what a start! I get really intrigued when a writer shows the more complex sides of a marriage. There are so many happy couples in the HP series, and we usually see the best snapshots of them. I really liked that you did the opposite, and showed their snapshots as they spiraled down. Not at their best moments, but at some of their painfully, and probably most realistic, ones.

Each argument you chose to show felt genuine. Ginny's on edge a lot, understandable with how crazy their lives must be, and it doesn't feel like they've worked out how to cope with one another when they are in the middle of the stressed out times.

I also liked that you didn't stick to one character for the little glimpse's. I was a bit confused about what was going on with Victoire and Teddy's and how that related, then James came out ready to play and it tied in perfectly. Teddy seemed to take the part of uncle. Older, not a sibling enough to fight like siblings, and wiser. I think it was an awesome position for him, not removed from the family but also not in the middle of the heat. It made for a really great person to see some of it from!

The end had such a sad feeling to it, and I just wanted to cuddle Lily up. It definitely got the reader hooked and ready to continue on to find out if Ginny is up and leaving, going to file for divorce, and what's going to happen from here.

Awesome start!

Author's Response: Thank you! I'm so glad you like this. I'm also glad you liked the characters, because I tried to make them as realistic as possible. I hope you enjoy this story and keep reading :).

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Review #14, by JchrissySunset Inn: Sunset Inn

2nd August 2013:
Oh! I don't know what's wrong with my brain, because I had temporarily blanked out on what happened to Bertha. It clicked where this was leading when she mentioned the name also being in Albanian and oh my gosh my heart just dropped.

You work in an awesome amount of details and give her a real personality in such a short length. The fact that she enjoys traveling by muggle means, and not because she think it's this odd thing that she wants to concur but because she genuinely seems to like it, was such a great detail.

You really showed your ability for descriptions in this chapter without over doing them.

The sentence about the Ministry not being happy with her if they had to explain her miraculous survival was so bittersweet. She has no idea at this point that she isn't going to survive much longer, and the cushioning charm 'just in case' was the least of her worries. Oh Sian, now you've given me all these sad feels. Hmph :(

The easy way she goes about it, her normal thoughts about taking pictures and just going about her business, lures us into such a false sense of security. Then when she spots Crouch Jr (was that him or am I totally confused?) and Peter walks in, it all just drops and we just want to crawl in the story and save her.

This was a really lovely way to use the HC challenge, especially since this story doesn't need the travel prompt. It can stand perfectly well on it's own!

Awesome job, lovely!

Author's Response: Oh, I'm sorry for making you sad! Even if it kind of was what I intended to happen when people read this...

Bertha is hardly mentioned in the books so I had a lot of freedom writing her, and I wanted to give her a likable personality and make her seem real. I'm pleased you liked the descriptions as well!

I know! I'm mean, aren't I? But I figured that Bertha didn't know what was going to happen and for her this day was an adventure. I grew to like her character a lot with this (which is strange, since I wrote it) and I really wanted to make her last day one that she really enjoyed.

No, you're not totally confused! That bit was purposely ambiguous as well ;)

Thank you for the awesome review, Jami! You're really spoiling me here!

Sian :)

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Review #15, by JchrissyThe Peverell Society: 1. Beginnings

2nd August 2013:
Yay! I'm finally getting to read the first chapter of your new baby!

I loved the start. Both the fact that it was a bit eerie, and how you brought us from the outside it. That's one of my absolutely favorite techniques, and it worked beautifully here.

I feel like we never left Scorpius and Rose now that they're back to their playful banter. Rose is a really awesome combination of sensitive and fiery, and it's fun seeing Scorpius want to the relationship to move a bit faster with her taking baby steps. Part of me thinks that it might be possible she's just dragging her feet to annoy him, haha!!

Molly was characterized so perfectly and sweet in this. I love how the family, apart from Ron, were happy to accept Scorpius. And Ron's just being a butt -- we know he'll come around. He has to decide not to like it simply because he *told* Rose ages ago not to get too friendly with him. I loved that you added that, btw.

The parallels between father and daughter, Rose not moving in with Scorp to be half stubborn and Ron not accepting the relationship simply because he'd decide it wasn't going to happen years ago, and is also being stubborn, seriously made me giggle. I loved it. Like father, like daughter ;).

I think this was the perfect way to start your story off! Even if I hadn't read book one, I don't think I'd be confused. But I feel like I'm more intimately involved in the characters for having read it, if that makes sense.

Awesome start, my lovely Ral!

Author's Response: Jami! You came to see my new baby. That right now is of epic proportions and grows every day! I swear I have subplots and plot twists flying at me from all angles!

I wanted the start to be all dark and twisty and then show that is was just Rose being silly. The relationship has grown in the months that have passed since Twin Wands (which was placed during November-December), but Rose is still not there and that is something they will deal with later on, as the story progresses.

Molly is a dear and I can't wait for the next time she makes an appearance. Writing them gathering around the old house at the Burrow gives me the warm and fuzzies!

And Ron, is indeed, as stubborn as he was when he was young. He believes in a certain order of things, and a Malfoy in his family tree isn't in that order. But maybe something will come along to make him change his mind! ;)

I'm so happy you feel connected to my characters. I feel that way about them too, and I have this whole journey planned out in my head and I am so excited about sharing it with you! Also, I can't wait for your next project to start! We'll be raising our babies together! :D

Thank you for the awesome review and support! I just wanna hug you so tight! ♥

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Review #16, by JchrissyThe Calendar Girls: Celebrating

2nd August 2013:
Oh my god, Val, I seriously feel like i was just with all these women/girls for the day and I'm exhausted!!! You did such an awesome job showing their chaotic lives, and I loved the sarcastic/fun personality of Autumn.

I feel like people think large families has to be reserved for the Weasleys, so I LOVED that you gave us this awesome big family Christmas scene with an entirely separate family! Molly Weasley doesn't have the market on children, after all.

And of course you slid in some of your Frenchness into this, which I always love. That and the new adopted baby (who I hope we get to meet!) were awesome little details to help give us a good picture of this family and to open up the world a bit from the small Hogwarts tunnel we often get with next gen.

I'm such a sucker for Bill/Fleur (your grounded for that, btw) and their kids, that I loved seeing Dom as one of our MC. I hope ;). Everything about them felt very natural and like actual friends, not just characters you put together for the sake of plot. Also, do we get to go to France and visit Fleur and Louis?! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!

I really liked this first chapter, m'dear!

Author's Response: Trust me, that many females grouped together can only be exhausting (and I speak as a female too, random person hypothetically reading my response, so no need to get onto your feminist battle horse)!

People do seem to think that large families are only for the Weasleys, right? As someone who has a twenty first cousins, I wanted to recreate the sense of chaos and agitation that comes with family gatherings -- and come to think of it, this was quite mild compared to my family!

Yes, you do meet the adopted baby! (Also, of course there would be French, because I'm a snooty bilingual who likes to show off ;) )

I AM SORRY, PLEASE DON'T GROUND ME. But I've always felt that at least one Weasley couple would get a divorce (there's a 1/3 statistic, after all), and Ron and Hermione were overdone...

Thank you for the review, lovely!

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Review #17, by JchrissyThe Spider's Web: 1. First Day

2nd August 2013:
Hi lovely! I saw you post that you had a new story on the forums and wanted to come check it out!

I really felt bad for Lily in this first chapter, haha. I can't imagine it'd be easy for her to find a job without wondering/being told if it was only because of her father that she got it and not on her own credentials. She just needs to show them that, yes, she may be daughter of Harry Potter but she's still intelligent and capable on her own! Even if she did get hired because of her dad, that doesn't mean she can't prove to them that she's better than anyone else would have been.

Although... she isn't off to the best foot in this chapter, hahaa. Poor thing. Her family teasing her felt really realistic, and I like the combination of 'oh it's okay,' and 'wow you really messed that up' between the cousins. It made me giggle.

Her new boss seems a bit like Slughorn. He seems absolutely thrilled to have daughter of HP (and like a total suck up) in the office, where Bridget seems like she couldn't care less if Lily messed up and was fired on the first day. Well, I think she'd actually quite enjoy it. I can imagine she's just annoyed and maybe slightly jealous of Lily, so I"m excited to see how their relationship plays out.

This was a really awesome first chapter, Jenny!!

Author's Response: Hi Jami! Thank you for taking the time to stop over here and read my story! It means a lot :)

Thanks! I imagine it being really hard for the Potter and Weasley kids because of the pressure that surrounds them. You need good grades to even be considered for an Auror job so she has the capability but people will always wonder!

I wanted to give the cousins some different and contrasting personalities - Roxanne the joker, Rose the uptight one, etc, so I'm glad you appreciated that!

Yes, Ernie is definitely a character. I hadn't even realised the Slughorn comparison until now! Bridget is so fun to write, and yes jealousy is definitely a part of it but not entirely! ;)

Thank you lovely! :)

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Review #18, by JchrissyPassing ships : Passing ships

1st August 2013:
Hi there! And thank you for the lovely review ♥

I really like when stories deal with Ron and Hermione in a normal way to get to the Draco Hermione. A lot of them involve a ton of drama and a ton of things both parties do that are just super out of character. Too much bickering, too long of work hours in Ron's opinion, and not enough sensitivity to what she wanted in Hermione's opinion seem like really solid reasons for a marriage to fail. Especially one that was gotten into too quickly and both were still dealing with their own grief of the war.

I also liked that you didn't have Hermione just becoming this totally different person once she saw Draco and have them pal up instantly. They've both suffered and it's fun to imagine the bond that can create between them, but you did a good job giving them a few nights of the cat and mouse game!

The end, when she finally decided to go in, made me smile. She deserves to do whatever she wants. She's a grown, unattached women and I liked that she ended up proving him right.

This was a very sweet read, m'dear! Thank you so much for an awesome swap! ♥


Author's Response: Hi Jami! Sorry it's taken so long to get around to replying and you're very welcome for your review, it was well deserved!

This is the third Draco/Hermione story I've written and each time I always have Ron and Hermione separate on mutual terms, I really love Ron's character and I don't like when fanfiction portrays him as violent or a cheater, I just can't imagine it.

I did worry that their transition was a little fast paced and OOC but like you said, they've both suffered in similar ways so it makes sense they would gravitate towards each other.

I'm really glad you liked the story, thanks so much for the swap! x

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Review #19, by JchrissyAn Illusion of Sanity: The Revival of Chivalry

1st August 2013:
Hi there, and congratulations on your first chapter!!! I realized a few paragraphs in that it was super familiar, then remembered coming across it in the queue!

Anyway, I love the intensity you start off with. It's obvious Perri suffered some serious trauma, and the end of that section had me believing it was possibly a werewolf attack? Regardless, you definitely gave the reader something to sink their teeth into!

I liked Perri's nervousness at the beginning, and the way she seemed to blend comfortable in the group. Your grammar is great and I didn't notice any typos, which made the entire read really smooth!

You're going to face a bit of people commenting on a few cliches, but I don't think there is anything wrong with cliches if they're well done. Just make sure you flesh out a probable reason for Perri to be there and keep her from falling into Mary Sue land, and I think you'll have an awesome story on your hands!

You got the funny/teasing banter I always imagine of next gen down perfectly, and that balanced out the serious side of the beginning really well. It was fun getting to see the whole group through the eyes of someone who'd just stepped into their world.

I think you have a really lovely start so far, m'dear! Good luck, and thank you for the awesome swap!


Author's Response: Thank you so much! I'm really excited to be starting a story! I'm trying to stay away from cliches/making cliches too cliche! Perri definitely has a reason for being there! That's coming in the near future! Thank you! I'm glad you think they're funny! I always adore reading stories that have banter, so I wanted to try to add a little of my own!

Thank you for the absolutely lovely review! xx

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Review #20, by JchrissyCareful What You Wish For: Brothers and Sisters

25th July 2013:
Hi Courtney! I'm so excited about this new story of yours! First off, the feeling of realism is awesome in this. It brought back way too many memories of being late for school and my sisters either wearing my shirts or locking me out of the bathroom and *shudder* haha.

I think it's cool you write about twins. If anyone would be able to understand them, it would be you :P And I really like that you didn't seem to have them disliking one another in this or getting along disgustingly well. They're sisters! they love one another and one day will be best friends, but they can still argue and they seem to have their own personalities.

And now, of course, i'm crossing my fingers that there might be a little something there to discover between Dani and Oliver? Or maybe they don't know it's there yet and we'll watch it develop along the way? Sorry, i can't shush my romantic heart, haha!

This was a really awesome first chapter. It felt realistic, entertaining, and set some of our main players up perfectly so we know who they are but you didn't go into pages of back story. Also, your paragraphs are formatted REALLY well in this! I love that you've decided to stick with the longer ones you were getting into at the end of Missing. This whole story just has a more polished feel to it so far.

Really excited to read the second! hopefully in a few hours after I get some lunch and deal with some work stuff :D!

Author's Response: Hey Jami! It's lovely to see you here:)

My twin sister and I don't usually get on very well, I have to admit. However we certainly don't hate each other (most of the time) and so I definitely think Dani and Kat reflect the two of us in many ways - me being the amazing, cooler twin that everybody likes, obviously.

There may be something there to discover between Oliver and Dani...or there may not...or there may be something there completely unexpected...we'll have to wait and see!

I'm so glad you liked the first chapter! And the paragraphs! I'm quite happy you pointed that out, actually, considering its one of the main things I've thought about for this story. I definitely thing (hopefully) that my writing has improved since the start of Missing!

Thanks again for the lovely review.

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Review #21, by JchrissySilver Linings: Albus: When Secrets Become Burdens

24th July 2013:
OHH holy cow. This just got messy. Is Chris going to tell? Is Al? They have to say something, right? Or make her say something?

I think it's really realistic that she lied to Xavier when she found out why they couldn't be a traditional family, but it isn't any less sad. They could have been their own sort of family, and the baby would have even more people to love it and ugh. Okay. I'm all emotional now because I feel really sad for both her and Xavier and I'm very anxious to see how this will play out!

Oh Al, you poor boy. You're going to have to end up telling her, you realize this, right? Or I guess keep being mopey and Lexi will figure it out soon enough. Still. I really dislike Rich for the sole reason of the fact that he has no place in my Lexi Al +baby world. Maybe when she tells him he'll turn out to be really awesome about it and tell her he thinks she needs to give things a try with Albus since she's having a baby with him? No? I'm living in a dream land? Damn. well, at least it was worth a try :P

I'm so happy you had Albus realize his feelings though. It didn't do anything productive, but at least he knows they're there and he can't wait forever to act on them. Can he? See, this is as far as I got reading before, and now I don't know what to expect next, and ahh! At least I don't have to wait for new chapters :P!

A really awesome read, lovely!

Author's Response: Yeah, it got very messy. Oops. Who's going to tell is the question; you'll have to wait and see. ;)

I'm good you're sad, but still think it's realistic. I was very anxious about this part of the story, but I could imagine the thought of her raising the baby alone being a scary experience for her and it stemmed from there. Xavier and Tasha were only meant to have small parts at first, I didn't expect this, so I'm especially glad you like it. :)

Oh, Al. It would probably help of he stopped worrying so much, but then he wouldn't be Al. Aww, you can dislike Rich if you want to - he is getting in the way. I like your dream land. :D

Yes! He knows! Who knows what that will do? ;)

Thank you so much for leaving a review, Jami! I hope you enjoy the rest of the chapters!


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Review #22, by JchrissyGoodbye, Molly Prewett: One

24th July 2013:
I only have one heart! If you melt that heart, then I won't have anything to pump my blood all around, and I won't have a working brain, and I'll die.

So, basically, you wrote this with the intention to kill me.


I think one of my favorite parts was the first scene. Arthur is so new and green and Moody is still Moody, Rufus (did I spell that right?) and his conversation particularly chilling.

The comparison to this and Grindelwald's reign and now, only this being worse because they don't even know what they're fighting. They don't know when the next attack will be, how to make them stop, nothing. That's such a scary realization and I just want to take them all and cuddle them.

For the situation Arthur was in, he handled it so well. It just shows that this young man, who will always maintain his childlike spirit, also always had a moral compass of steel. He isn't going with the men out of curiosity, because he's never seen a crime scene, or anything like that. That flash of anger we see when Moody tell Arthur who was murdered, and that the old head boy married a Muggle. now him and his children and wife all dead because of it, shows that whole other side of Arthur we know. That's why he's able to commit himself to the Order in later years, and that's why -- even though he is pureblood and could be safe because of that -- he always keeps fighting for what's right. Because it's right.

Ugh, getting all emotional over here. Okay. Let's move on before i continue blabbering.

Molly was so perfect in every way. I love her concern for her father, and the pride she has in him. It didn't seem like she had this deep love for the flowers, but had that sort of love for her father which made her feel the same about the career and passion he'd chosen. AND THE BABY! I WAS SURPRISED! YOU SURPRISED ME!

When she thought about Arthur not coming over the night before i got really worried that maybe the dangers weren't all gone from the house they'd gone to. Poor man was so upset, and I loved that he told Molly all about it. That speaks volumes of their relationship. Two equals sharing everything, not Arthur feeling like he has to keep things from his wife. Future wife.

See, that proposal and their talk about wondering if he was just scared and gah. This is when I melted the most. The only reason I"m still typing is because I've somehow managed to force my puddles of fingers to squish along the keyboard.

But of course, you couldn't give me an easy elopement. You had to go and cause trouble, didn't you? I love how determined Molly is though, and more than that the fact that it shows how much she truly wants to marry Arthur, no matter the circumstance.

Oh Sarah. I don't know how on earth you can create such perfect stories, and it makes e very angry that midwife-ing keeps you so busy because i would like more of these. Daily ones to wake up to, perhaps?

This was beautiful. You captured these people perfectly. They aren't the exact as they are when we first meet them, and they shouldn't be. They're younger versions of themselves and you really created a clear image of how these young people would eventually grow into the Arthur and Molly we know and love. ♥

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Review #23, by JchrissyDetox: Errors in Judgment

24th July 2013:

The description of the potion is absolutely disgusting. Oh my god. I could never, ever drink Polyjuice. I remember thinking that in the books, now youve just reminded me why :P!

I love the irony of Draco feeling irritate about being around small minded, self important people. There wasnt a time so long ago where I can imagine Lucius, Narcissa and Draco sitting in a sort of situation where Narcissa might not think Draco was getting the respect he deserved and saying similar things. Hes come a long way, our Draco, especially to be able to recognize such annoying qualities in others.

Oh of course stupid Blaise couldnt keep a secret. I hate that Dracos had to become even more absorbed in this all. Honestly, I think the best thing he could do would be to tell Astoria whats going on, tell the group he wont be involved in it, and if they out him for the wedding... well, the idea that Draco tricked his way into the wedding to spend time with Astoria is still a lot more pleasant than him being involved in their mental idea to get things going again. Not that it would all be an easy encounter, and with the hotheadedness of his friends he might be dealing with them trying to take revenge, but at least if hes having to defend himself that will prove even more whos side hes on.

Okay, ramble over. Haha. I really like Astorias attitude toward Emery/Draco. She plays a long for a few minutes -- maybe to give him a chance to confess -- then, oh boy. Shes not letting him get away with this one.

Its nice to see Astoria acting a bit over dramatic. Shes always pretty composed, that watching her snap on Draco was a lot of fun! Ohhh Draco can be so sincere this time! I was worried he might get angry back, but I loved seeing him care enough to apologize!

I cant even... I dont know how to comment on the Astoria to Draco look what I can do section. You left her line off on a perfect one with her reaching her hand, and then Dracos what are you doing!

Aww now I feel sad for both of them :(. Astorias so hurt, and Draco seems genuinely willing to try and fix that hurt but he just doesnt understand. He wants to keep her safe, and I still think hes making a mistake by not telling her everything, but all that happens is she gets filled with all the doubt every girl will deal with once in a while.

I also love that shes already considering it as what she lost because everything really is that cut and dry at her age. She feels like thats it, not like theyll work things about, but that its just the end of it all. God, you couldnt pay me to be 16 again. Poor thing just needs a big hug.

This was a much more emotional chapter and really showed a lot of Dracos more caring sides. But I really liked to have it end with so much turmoil, and of course leave us to wonder how theyll work things out.

Another awesome chapter, Daniel! 

Author's Response: Hi, Jami!

I don't think I could handle polyjuice, either, but I used to think the same thing about bourbon. I suppose you can acquire a taste for anything, or at least learn to suppress your gag reflex.

Wasn't that some delicious irony? Draco is experiencing the world as "the 99%" lives it, and he's definitely learned a thing or two. I imagine that the Draco in this story would not be able to stand the Draco from the beginning of Marked.

It was pretty dumb of Draco to assume that Blaise wouldn't blab his secret. Zabini is in so far over his head that bits of information are really the only "currency" he has to maintain his status among his fellow conspirators. You're probably right about the long-term merits of the path Draco's chosen versus one where he simply comes clean with Astoria about everything. At the moment, however, he's just too wrapped up in his own bad memories of the war to see that. All he can think about is keeping her out of it. And as far as his old "friends" go, he feels as though he can handle them with little or no trouble. Spending time around Bellatrix and Voldemort messes with your sense of what's dangerous and what isn't.

Astoria was all kinds of confused in this chapter. She still has the conversation with Isadore ringing in her ears, and all the insecurities that went along with it. She was feeling a little hurt that Draco sneaked into the wedding without telling her. And once she realizes that Draco isn't planning to reveal himself, that hurt turns into betrayal. So she does saddle up the Drama Llama and ride. I'm glad you liked that part. I've really been trying to show her in a more realistic light for a 16-year-old girl.

Their relationship is definitely on rocky shoals now. As of the last moment you see them, both of them are pretty much in shock. Astoria has had a little more time to process what happened, but she's still far from being in a good state of mind. Don't worry, I don't want to have any 16-year-old girls around. Too much drama.

All I can say is that you know that things *will* work out in the end, it's just a matter of when and how it happens. Which is coming up soon. ;)

Thanks for all of your help, support and awesome reviews!

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Review #24, by JchrissyBig: In Hagrid's Hands

19th July 2013:
Hi lovely!

This chapter had such a sad but soft feel to it. I think if anyone would know what it was like to feel too big, it would definitely be Hagrid!

You really got is dialogue down, which is amazing! He sounded very in-canon Hagrid, and his thoughts felt really well placed too.

We see that he has tendencies to put himself down more than anyone, probably having adjusted to the teasing of others and wanting to make fun of himself before they do, and you showed that part of him really perfectly here. Then you added another important layer to his characterization with the proud sort of feeling he had when thinking he was on a mission for Dumbledore. I LOVED that!

Your writing gets better each time I read something of yours ♥ Your dialogue punctuation was perfect, and no errors popped out at me.

I think the only thing I'd suggest with this would be playing up your flashbacks a bit more and tying them more into the story. I loved them, so I don't think you should get rid of them or anything, but you could add a few sentences so that we could sort of follow his thought process. Like this the first, here's how you end that section:

.baby Harry to his chest with one hand and pressed down on the handlbar to sprint down the road in the other, taking off in a whirl wind of dust, in to the night sky.

And next you start on the memory of his spider. You could add something in there, just a sentence about knowing the importance of keeping the small child safe, and not wanting the memory of the last time he'd cared for a helpless creature and how that had ended to plague him. Then that would sort of transition us into the memory of when he'd failed to keep and care for his spider :)!

This was another really awesome chapter, and I'm so excited to see who you do next!

Author's Response: I only just remembered I hadn't responded to this review! Grrr I'm really sorry Jami!

Haha I agree! Hagrid is the physically biggest person I could think of, aside from giants of course. Thank you, I had to go read snippets of his speech from the books! I love Hagrid, and I had immense fun describing him, and his speech was one of the best bits!

I think there's probably a big vunerable side of Hagrid -- for a start, he attaches himself to creatures way too much, and empathises with them for being outsiders because of how they look and act -- and also, he's very sensitive, and soppy! Therefore, I think it makes sense that he likes to feel useful, seeing as he used to feel so big and useless, so being specially chosen by Dumbledore to do this made him feel good about himself :)

That's made me go all warm and fuzzy inside! I'm so happy you said that, thank you! &hearts

That is really awesome advice, I'll go back and try to smooth it out a bit more, so I can keep it flowing :P Thank you for helping me improve it!

Heheh thanks for stopping by again Jami, you're awesome!

-Sophie :D

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Review #25, by JchrissyFear and Loathing in Branson: Around the World, Wizarding Style

11th July 2013:
In your question on if we found it amusing, unsettling, or bizarre -- can I choose all of the above? :P

I really loved that you wrote all this through the eyes of a nobody in a place that seems like a nowhere. It was so funny to be inside Rick's very confused brain as Neville yammered on about things he ought not be yammering on about.

You know, I really don't think Mr. Longbottom would be one to hold his liquor well, and after this I think it's a pretty safe bet that he certainly can't.

I love that they chose to take the trip together, even if maybe it was a bit more than Neville could handle ;). And Luna, sweet innocent Luna... well, let's not go there.

The sort of camaraderie Rick was offering Neville, surely having been in the 'too much too early in the day,' really made the story. Here he is, a good ol' down home boy off seeing the sites with his wife, and deciding to befriend and chat an odd looking fellow... and what does he end up with? Tales about things he obviously thinks is rubbish, a conversation with one of the wizarding world most famous people as of late, and obliviated all because he wanted to be nice and chat. HAHA.

Throughout I couldn't decide if I felt worse for Neville or Rick. Poor Rick is trying to decipher between Neville being off his rocker and just intoxicated, and poor Neville is just trying to blow off some steam, ahah!

I really, really enjoyed this, Dan. We haven't gotten a comedy from you since Snape, and I forgot how good at humor you are!

Author's Response: Hi!

You can certainly answer "all of the above". I'm still trying to sort that one out, myself.

Aside from the fact that Rick was such a huge cultural contrast to Neville, he was also a pretty easy character for me to write. I just thought to myself, "what would my redneck uncles say and do in this situation?" The ball rolled downhill from there. ;)

Like you said, Rick really does want to help Neville, at least at first. He has that "christian charity" thing going on in his mind, along with a modest dose of the mostly harmless conceit of believing that he knows enough to fix another person's troubles. Boy, does he get more than he bargained for, though. Aside from Neville confusing the daylights out of him, he gets his brains rearranged at the end.

I'm still kind of torn about the way that Luna comes off in this. The thing is, I really can see her behaving in a way close enough to how Neville describes her that it would only amount to a small amount of drunken embellishment on his part. She tends to be emotionally disconnected enough that I think it's all just biology to her. I did really enjoy her appearance at the end.

I wish I could write more comedy. Honestly, it's harder for me to write than the angsty stuff because it's so rare that I come up with a genuinely funny thought that is both compatible with HP characters *and* ToS-compliant. You're familiar with a lot of the non-compliant thoughts and I'm sure you'll agree, nothing good could come of those. ;)

I'm really pleased that you enjoyed it! Thanks for the lovely review.

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