Reading Reviews From Member: draco_lover12
52 Reviews Found

Review #1, by draco_lover12Confronting Temptation: Pre Party Disscusions

13th April 2014:
Okay loads of spelling mistakes yet again; beginning and manor, not manner, being two of them. Loved seeing the paragraphs as their really important in story telling. But when your doing speech then obviously it won't have that.

Glad Albus is finally telling his parents about being gay, he needs to.

Draco and Astoria are actually being really nice. Rose needs to chillax about that and just go with the flow or she's going to stick out even more.


Author's Response: Yeah it is something about having to have the chapter posted on the site that makes me notice them. I went in and posted a new version of the Chapter in validation so hopefully it will be posted soon.
I think Draco and Astoria are being Draco and Astoria. She's just nervous, and I don't think she completely thought about what getting married would mean in terms of the family, she was just thinking that she loved Scorpius. Anyways all will be told. Thank you for reading and reviewing.

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Review #2, by draco_lover12Unexpected Parenthood: Chapter Forty-Three

28th March 2014:
So happy there's going to be a sequel as there needs to be. I want to know what happens to Flick, Albus, Aubrey and Bentley!

Laura x

Author's Response: Laura!

Yes there is a sequel! Exciting stuff, there does need to be. Especially once you've read the last chapter and the one shot I have planned which happens between this and the sequel, there is bound to be a million questions.

You'll find out m'dear!

Thanks for reading and reviewing. *hugs*

Soph x

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Review #3, by draco_lover12Confronting Temptation: Reacting Actions

14th March 2014:
I'm back again :P

I like to point out the lack of paragraphs. Two sentences is not a paragraphs and it can be slightly frustrating, and annoying that I can't read it in one bunch. Instead its like reading two sentences, stopping and then going again.

Also keep an eye on the , in speech because when it doesn't have say he said/she said after it it should have a . not a , . Hope this makes sense.

Ron is acting childish in my opinion and he needs a kick up the backside and just accept his daughter's decision. If he doesn't make an effort to get to know Scorpius how will he ever see he is different?


Author's Response: That's the beauty of novel writing. You don't have to follow the rules of standard composition writing. Fragments are actually more commonly accepted along with the occasional run on (although I know I have way too many of those.) Still I went back and I reread the chapter and I have to disagree with the paragraph lengths. A paragraph is a group of sentences that are related to each other. As an author a paragraph's spacing can also be used to emphasize a point. But even in those situations the paragraphs were more than two sentences. Now another reason for the spacing is that you can't have more than one perspective in a single paragraph, that is a big no no, and for that there must also be a space. I did notice that the spacing was much different in this chapter and it is because this chapter has a lot more internal thinking than other chapters, so I spaced for purpose and I personally like it that way.
As for the in speech, I did not know that about the ., so thank you for telling me. I will try to remember that when I'm writing.
Is Ron acting childish? for all you know he could actually be trying to mend things and Scorpius has just really messed up. If Ron didn't see how important it was to Rose that he get to know Scorpius I doubt he would have sent the letter. Also I'm sure Ron knows what it is going to take to get his daughter back, and it's not by bashing her new husband in a letter. But that is only one way to think about it.
Thank you for reading and for the tips.

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Review #4, by draco_lover12Confronting Temptation: From Ms. to Mrs.

12th March 2014:
I love this story but I am finding spelling mistakes and stuff as I read, and to be honest it can be distracting.

Stuff like beginning spelt wrong.

Is this being finished as I love Rose/Scorpius.


Author's Response: Yes it is the next chapter has been waiting validation since Saturday so hopefully it will be up soon. As for the spelling I try my best to catch it but usually I never catch things until after they are posted. I try my best to go in and fix it when ever I get the time. Thanks for reading and reviewing.

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Review #5, by draco_lover12Fighting Temptation: Epilogue

2nd March 2014:
Mmm.spelling mistakes glore in the beginning

Author's Response: Yeah the beginning is a huge mess not just with spelling but with grammar as well. I learned a lot over the three years it took to write it. I'm in the processing of editing it, it just takes time to do that. Thank you for reading.

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Review #6, by draco_lover12Albus Potter and the Potions Master's Solution: Secret of the Shack

8th February 2014:
I think, no know, Stuart killed Michael and maybe the Quidditch player, too.

Author's Response: It's possible. Thanks for reading and reviewing! :)

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Review #7, by draco_lover12Unexpected Parenthood: Chapter Forty

23rd January 2014:
Yay they graduated but why is her mother there, and will she tell Albus or will he see B&A and figure it out that their his, and if so how will that end?

Author's Response: Hi there,

Long time no speak :) Yup they've graduated at last, free from Hogwarts now! Her mother being there is explained in the next chapter. Flick does tell Albus very, very soon, in fact chapter 41/42 contain it!! All will be revealed.

Thanks for reading and reviewing!

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Review #8, by draco_lover12Unexpected Parenthood: Chapter Thirty-Nine

22nd January 2014:
Finally I have caught up! I can't believe I've never read this story or even tried to find it, but I hope you will finish it. Flick is doing my head in not telling Albus because he needs to know.

Author's Response: Hey,

I definitely will finish this, I have each of the chapters planned out right until the last one.

He sure does.

Thanks for R+R'ing!

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Review #9, by draco_lover12Albus Potter and the Potions Master's Solution: Elsie's Evidence

26th October 2013:
Young's got a time turner somehow!!!

Author's Response: It's possible! Thanks for reading and reviewing! :)

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Review #10, by draco_lover12Albus Potter and the Potions Master's Solution: Polyjuice Potion

15th September 2013:
I'm still reading this story and still loving it. The potions master is spooky and he's up to something for sure. Could he be somehow connected to the murder through brewing the Polyjuice Potion.


Author's Response: I'm very glad you still like it! Burke is definitely up to something, and you'll find out what it is by the end of the fic. Thanks for reading and reviewing! :)

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Review #11, by draco_lover12Albus Potter and the Potions Master's Solution: Slytherin's New Chaser

6th September 2013:
I've just tried to get your story sent to my kindle as I have the actual device and it on my iPhone

Author's Response: Very cool! I don't have a Kindle and my iPod is too old for the Kindle app to work, but eventually I'll get a new one and then I'll be able to use the Kindle button. Thanks for reading and reviewing! :)

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Review #12, by draco_lover12Albus Potter and the Potions Master's Solution: New Chasers

13th July 2013:
Wait, wait did I read that. Rose is telling Albus not to grass on John and Kaden for a prank? Seriously, what's gotten into this girl. Where's the old Rose gone?


Author's Response: You did! Rose is very loyal to her friends, despite her love of rules. She'd only betray them if someone were in danger from a prank. Thanks for reading and reviewing! :)

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Review #13, by draco_lover12Albus Potter and the Potions Master's Solution: Prefects

26th May 2013:
Yay my favourite stories are back and you know from our conversation last night I love these stories. I can't wait to see what mischief these five are going to get into!


Author's Response: I'm so glad you like them so much! Thanks for reading and reviewing! :)

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Review #14, by draco_lover12The Worst: The Worst Had Happened

30th March 2013:
lauradracolover with your review here.

I think the chapter and the feelings were spot on in terms of feeling etc and the reactions of her family. I think Dom needed to lash out.


Author's Response: Hey! Thanks for reading and reviewing. I am glad you liked the way the feelings were expressed and the family's reactions. Thank you!

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Review #15, by draco_lover12What If?: Mixed Memories

30th March 2013:
lauradracolover with your review, eventually :P

I think Rose needs to stop this wedding from happening because I get the feeling she is about to make a major mistake in her life. She is still in love with Scorpius and she needs to deal with this before she carries on with this.

I saw no CC's.


Author's Response: Hi Laura, don't worry about how long it took!

Haha with the wedding you'll only find out in the last chapter! I'm glad that you found no CC's :D

Thanks for the review,

-Kiana :D

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Review #16, by draco_lover12It's Not Love: Best Friends And All That Jazz

24th March 2013:
lauradracolover here with your review swap.

I actually liked Mikaela more in this chapter than the previous one - I somehow think she's going to get a shock when she finally meets Nicholas. She is more realistic that's for sure.

I saw no problems with this chapter CC wise.


Author's Response: Awww thankyou Lauraa xx

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Review #17, by draco_lover12Tale as Old as Time: I Really, Really Don't Want to Go Home

24th March 2013:
lauradracolover with your review.

Mmm.Madison seems to hate her home life and I am guessing there is some reason there.

I wonder if she will ever give James a try - he called her Madison. I just feel there is something going on between these two.

From a CC point of view - I would go through and close the gaps between the writing. I know its annoying but I do it on my own story. It just makes the chapter flow more clearly. You've got some really good descriptions in there regarding the guys in the story.


Author's Response: I do need to go and fix those chapter gaps; they bug me too! I'm glad you liked my descriptions, and more will be revealed regarding her home life and any James/Madison drama as the story progresses. Thanks for the review!

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Review #18, by draco_lover12It's A Muggle Thing: The Coming Of Magic (Backstory)

22nd March 2013:
lauradracolover with your review.

I pointed this out yesterday to someone about their usage of the word and - it's annoying me now when its used when it doesn't need to be.

At first Freya and I just hear a lot of arguing from the front door but before we knew it the man appeared in are kitchen out of nowhere and or Dad was left shouting at thin air - where the nowhere was, this could be changed or, nowhere, as Dad was left shouting into thin air.

I've been beta'd myself and she has helped me so much in all of my writing where there are errors. It makes myself a better one. Another one at the beginning, it should be Freya and I not I and Freya.

Apart from that it's a good start, and good descrption of the twins.


Author's Response: Thank you for the review!

I'm am very grateful that you pointed these things out to me as I find it hard to pick up on things like this myself and so will make sure to change them when I get around to editing this chapter.


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Review #19, by draco_lover12Resonance: The Offer

20th March 2013:
I've found this story quiet late and I'm kind of gutted to know the third story wasn't finished as I love this!


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Review #20, by draco_lover12Not Normal: {Chapter the First}

17th March 2013:
lauradracolover with your review, eventually.

Mmm...I'm not sure what to make of Ellie; she's certainly a typical teenager being full of herself, cocky and not wanting to do what she wants to do.

I didn't see any problems with this story, and if you want to request, please feel free to do so.


Author's Response: Hello!

Ellie is interesting, for sure. And she most definitely is a little cocky!

Thanks for the review!

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Review #21, by draco_lover12It's Not Love: The First Official Encounter Along With Presents

16th March 2013:
lauradracolover with your review, eventually.

The CC stuff first:

There was Adele King and Samuel King looking directly at me like I am a bloody monument! - this should or could have been written just as Adele and Samuel King.

Also I noticed capital letters where they shouldn't. I'm really beginning not to like this stuck-up person.


Author's Response: Haha thanks for the CC

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Review #22, by draco_lover12It's Not Love: Long Walks And Oversharing Of Tales

13th March 2013:
lauradracolover here with your review.

What a very touching scene between mother and daughter. I think it was needed and Mikaela is being so grown up in accepting her fate. Sweet story with the old couple, too.

Love the chapter but you need to change automobile to vehicle. Maybe you can go through the check they've all been changed. Also maybe close the massive spaces between each paragraph.


Author's Response: Aw thankyouu! Will do.

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Review #23, by draco_lover12Tale as Old as Time: Prologue

13th March 2013:
lauradracolover here with your review.

Some very cute scenes there. You give some great thinking into James mind and he is just like we all think he would be.

See you can go back over and do something about the spaces between the chapters.

A good start but try to add some more details. It would have nice to have seen James reaction to being right about being put into Gryffindor.

Feel free to ask for more reviews.


Author's Response: Gah, those stupid spaces! It looks fine on word, and then *poof* massive gaps. I do need to fix that soon. :)

Now that you mention it, I think that would've been a really cool piece to add. I may go back and do that very soon. :)

Thanks for the review!


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Review #24, by draco_lover12Lily Luna Potter And My Teenage Confessions: Confession 13 - Of Being Bored, Hospital Appointments And Late Parents

13th March 2013:
You know how much I love this story! But there were some issues. I'm going to get those out of the way first, then onto the nice stuff.

When your talking about the baby. As it's only one, they're or any form of is unnecessary and it doesn't sound like your talking about more than one.

I've also noticed your missing out , to break up those mega long sentences.

I like this chapter.

Lily/Albus - I can understand why Albus is as angry as he is, but at the end of the day it's Lily's choice.

Lily/James - Awww this was so cute and I loved the fact that James picked up on what was going on between his siblings. Ginny needs to wise up.

I get the feeling Lily won't be giving this baby up.


Author's Response: You seem to love this as much as I do!

I don't know why but I don't like it when people call a baby an it. I mean it is a person no matter how small, so I guess when I say 'they're looking pretty healthy' or something like that it's because I prefer it instead of it, if that makes sense.
But I might got back and change it. And as far as I'm aware Lily is definitely only having ONE baby :)

Lily/Albus - Oh boy he's angry isn't he, but as you said it's Lily's chpoice ad Al really doesn't get a say in it.

Lily/James - I realised there was so little of James since he isn't at Hogwarts and I wanted to do a scene between them since the last time they were together was when James/their parents founf out Lily was pregnant. And James has his uses, he can be wise at times like picking up on the little things between Lily and Al, especially since they're normally so close. And you're right, Ginny does need to wisen up but she also has a lot on her mind.

Who knows...

Thanks for reading and reviewing!!

Soph xx

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Review #25, by draco_lover12One Crazy Moment: The Interview

13th March 2013:
I liked the beginning of this story but I noticed at the beginning a few bits of grammer problems. Commas where they should be, breaking up long and winding sentences.

In overall you can get that Molly, if she doesn't like something, she won't go ahead and do it. I think she should give Cyrus a chance, because he seems charming and charisma.

I like the beginning of this.


Author's Response: Thank you for the review! I realise there are a few grammar mistakes and I need to go back and edit them at some point.

I'm glad I got that aspect of Molly across, because it was something I wanted people to understand.

Thanks again for the review!

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